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What if?

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What if?

Chapter 1

 

It was too quiet on the WaveRider, Sara was a little concerned about what her team was doing. It couldn't be that late can it? Usually, there was some noise, Nate in the library or Mick getting another beer or even ray doing laundry because apparently doing it at night keeps his clothes cleaner. Yeah, she didn't get it either. Or maybe the whiskey finally hit her, and the silence is her brain playing tricks on her. Either way, she was going to sit there and drink till she can't even remember why she's feeling so sorry for herself.

 

Ava walked into Sara's captions quarters, took one look at her, and sighed. "Sara?" Sara continued to look blankly at the floor with an empty bottle on her desk and a half-full cup in her hand resting on her thigh. "Sara?" she tried again this time she kneeled in front of her. Sara didn't even move when Ava softly caressed her cheek hoping that would bring Sara out of whatever slumber her drunken mind has her trapped in. "babe!" she tried once more with a bit more force behind it and finally Sara looked up at her.

 

Sara's stormy blue eyes were in so much pain Ava had to hold back a gasp. "Sara, my love what's wrong? Talk to me, you are scaring me. Please, baby, tell me what's going on it that beautiful mind of yours" Sara continued to stare as if Ava hadn't said anything or worse wasn't even there. Then suddenly she locked eyes with her and said "Ava tell me again why I can't save my sister? Please tell me why?" Sara spoke with such a haunted tone that finally it all made sense as to why she found Sara in this state of utter despair. It was the anniversary of laurel's death, Sara's sister and now with her father gone as well, Sara was the last lance alive.

 

"oh, baby I am so sorry, tell me what you need? I will do anything to get your mind off this." As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she knew that it was a mistake. Up until this point, Sara was basically comatose but when she asked what Sara needed the laugh that came out of her mouth was simply scary and the fire in her eyes now was almost enough the shake Ava to her core. Sara jumped up and started to yell and pacing her office looking more like a caged lion than a woman. "what I want is for everyone to stop asking me that and for someone to tell me why I can't fucking save my sister. And the fucking timeline isn't good enough anymore. When I died laurel risked everything for me, fucking everything and now years later I can't return the favour. It's not right and it's not fucking fair."

 

As Sara yelled, she got angrier and angrier. At one point she grabbed her forgotten glass that Ava put on her desk and thrown it as hard as she could. Ava simply watched it shatter and fall to the ground with sadness filling her heart. But towards the end, the anger died down and all that was left was pure grief. The absolute sorrow in her voice as she said the last bit was the breaking point for both. Ava stood and slowly walked towards her; she knew her anger wasn't aimed at her, so it was safe to approach this extremely deadly woman. And wrap her arms around Sara and finally all the pain and heartache Sara has felt since Rip told her, her sister died and there was no way she could save her came out. And for the first time in an awfully long time, Sara just cried and sobbed in Ava's arms.

 

Ava pulled them both to the couch and slowly sat down, Sara had no more fight left, she just let Ava lead and sat with her. Sara cried for what to her felt like hours but really it was maybe ten minutes before the alcohol and just straight-up exhaustion finally caught up her. She fell asleep right there in Ava's lap. As Ava ran her hand through Sara's hair, she thought over what had just happened. Laurel was a huge part of Sara's life and with her being the white canary, and how much Sara has told her about her sister. about how she got the name canary when she was with the league and how laurel turned it into something good. And that it was laurel who was the one who told Sara to join the legends. Ava felt like she knew her already just from the way Sara talked about her. she never left out any details even though it pained her. She just wished there was a way to save laurel and not break time again.

 

With that thought in mind after about another five minutes, Ava picked Sara up so she could bring her to her chambers to get a proper night's sleep because she knew her girlfriend would have one nasty hangover in the morning. She changed her into some sleepwear, grabbed some water and aspirin for her in the morning. Once it was in a place where Sara could easily find it, she left the bedroom and walked to the library. Once she got there Gideon made her presents known

"director Sharpe, what do you think? Is it possible to save miss lance without hurting time?" Ava sighed and wondered how many times this has happed that even Gideon was hurting for Sara. "I don't know Gideon but fuck I wish there was a way because after seeing that all I want to do is say "fuck it all we have a lance to save" but I know we can't because if we could then Sara would have done it already right?" Ava sighed with defeat "because from where I am standing there's no way to save her without causing unknown harm to the timeline."

 

"that's where you are wrong, Director" Gideon replied with as much smugness as an AI could. Ava scoffed "okay, do you know something I don't." Gideon answered with a chuckle "I know a lot of things you don't Director" Ava looked to the ceiling with a raised eyebrow as if to say seriously "but the point is there is one thing captain Lance hasn't looked into and quite frankly last time she got piss ass drunk and I brought it up she threatened to disconnect me" Ava nodded because yeah that sounded like Sara. "okay what is that?" Ava questioned "miss Tomaz's loophole program," Gideon said as if she had all the answers to life. Ava wanted to slam her head into the table, because of course why hadn't she thought of that. "Gideon, you are a genius" Gideon hummed as if to say duh "where is Zari now?" "miss Tomaz is sleeping in her room" Gideon answered with a hint of excitement because finally, someone was going to try and actually see if there was a way to save laurel.

 

Ava pretty much ran to Zari's room, she needed to know if there was a way to save laurel. If not for any other reason other than so Sara can finally let, go of the guilt she carries for not using the WaveRider to go back and tell laurel not to go the prison that night. Or something along those lines. Once she got to Zari's room, she thanked the gods (more accurately Gideon) that the door was unlocked. She walked in and shook her awake "Zari I need you to wake up right now!" Ava yelled in her ear. Zari opened an eye and looked at Ava, groaned rolled over and tried to go back to sleep. Ava was having none of that and ripped to blanket from her body. "holy fuck Ava there better be a fire, or I am literary going to kill you. Sara's girl or not!" Zari snapped angrily, sitting up and looking at Ava with hate for being woken up. Ava's heart flutter at the mention of being Sara's girl, even after all this time she still gets butterflies when someone brings it up. But the look on Zari's face made Ava put that thought away for later.

 

"there's no fire" Zari groaned "I need you to run your simulation to see if there's a way we can save Sara's sister." Zari scoffed with disbelief "you want me to try and hack history? You of all people! Fuck I must still be dreaming." Ava shook her head because of course nothing with the legends is ever easy. "yes, I want you to see if there is a way that we can save laurel without jeopardizing the timeline." Zari just looked at Ava for a solid minute trying to decide if the one thing Sara told her never to do is exactly the same thing Ava just woke her up in the middle of the night to do. Fuck that hurt her head she was way too tired to deal with this. "you know Sara has forbidden me from doing exactly that right?" Zari just had to ask because seriously why was it always her getting caught up in shit like this

 

"yes, she has told me as much back when you first joined the team." Zari sighed "okay fair enough I will run the simulation under a few conditions, one, we don't tell Sara unless there is an actual way of saving laurel two, we do this my way and three it's just us. I don't trust anyone else not to rat us out to Sara as soon as she gives them her "mom look" so with that what do you say Sharpey do we have a deal?"

 

Ava shook her head "don't call me that again and I completely agree with you." Ava stuck out her hand for a handshake. Zari grabbed her hand gave it one hard shake and then she completely took the wind out of her sails "we start tomorrow because I am tired and want to go back to sleep." at Ava's pout Zari sighed and shook her head "Ava go to bed I am sure Sara is missing you" at the mention of Sara, Ava sighed because she knew Zari was right she should go to bed. "fine goodnight and hey, thank you. You don't know how much this will help and mean to Sara if it works." Zari nodded her head "I have an idea, I may not have known Sara before her sister died but even when I met her I could tell she carried the weight of the world on her shoulders and was haunted by a past very few could live through and come back on the other side. So yeah, I know how important this is. Goodnight Ava, you make her happy you know. More then I think you even realize." With that Zari's door closed and Ava was left speechless.

 

Ava sighed and shook her head turning to digest what Zari had just said to her. She decided that it was late, and she really should get back to Sara to make sure she was okay. When she got to their bedroom and opened the door, she just had to laugh at what she saw. Sara was star fished on the bed snoring and drooling a bit. She walked over to move the hair out of her face when she pulled her hand back Sara's gorgeous blue eyes were open. "hey where did you go?" Sara asked, "to the bathroom my love, I am so sorry I woke you." Ava apologized. Sara hummed "was already awake" She replied lying and already half asleep again.

 

Ava smiled and nodded "okay babe you mind moving over so I can get some sleep too?" Ava asked. Sara made a ridiculously cute noise, nodded her head, and said, "yes I want cuddles" Ava just laughed, she loved Sara like this. With her guard down. When she was like this Ava could almost see the girl, she was before getting on the Queen's gambit. She crawled into bed and Sara wrapped herself around Ava as soon as she lied down. "goodnight my final girl I love you." Sara wisped in her ear "goodnight my beautiful girl I love you too" they both fell asleep with a smile on there faces and ava's last lingering though before she succumbed to sleep was "what if?"