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at least hold my hand while you drag me through hell

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The PE department won the match. Yaz did not go to the after party. Instead, the second Martha said she could go Yaz went straight home and she hasn’t stepped out of her door since. She’s sitting inside her house with her hamster watching comfort cartoons, wearing hoodies and pyjamas and eating so much food she shouldn’t and she’s been doing it all weekend. 

She can’t stop thinking about it. She can’t stop thinking about how she felt on her fingers. How she felt in her mouth, how she felt on her neck and it’s freaking her out because Yaz didn’t hate it. She knows for certain she would have let the Doctor finger her in that changing room all the way to climax if they had had the time because she’s dreamt about it. Her mind has played it out for her already for her. By Sunday evening she needs to tell someone about what happened in the changing room to save herself from going mad. So she texts Bill asking her to come over when she can and use the key under the mat to let herself in. 

Currently Yaz is sitting in bed under her covers with a hot dish of nachos filled with cheese, sour cream, guacamole, black olives, salsa all smothered in the chilli she spent all afternoon cooking. Food gives her something to concentrate on other than the thought of her and Doctor Smith alone in a changing room. 

“What the hell is this?” Bill asks. Yaz didn’t even hear her enter the house.

“I’m comfort eating.” Yaz says, mouth half full.

“Why?” Bill drops her bag on the floor so she can climb on her bed and cuddle up to Yaz. “What’s happened? Other than the black eye, that looks bad by the way.”

“You can’t laugh at me when I say it.” Yaz says. 

“Try me.” Bill takes a triangle shaped crisp and uses it to scoop up every element of the dish. 

Yaz feels the words tickle behind her lips and she gets nervous. She hasn’t even said it out loud to herself yet and it might break her when she does.

“On Friday in the changing rooms, once I’d been sent off, I started having sex with Doctor Smith.” Yaz goes ahead and says it- helping herself to some more of her food to ease the blow. 

“Oh. My God.” Bill stops chewing to digest the news. She puts back her half eaten crisp and moves to sit up on her knees, sending warning signs to Yaz that she’s going to be getting hell handed to her. 


“How? Why? What- wait oh my God does she say something really nerdy when she climaxes like ‘ to infinity and beyond!’ ?”

“I don’t know.” Yaz says. “I said we started. We didn’t… I didn’t… we got caught.” She says. She feels so ashamed at the fact they got caught- probably because she was on track to the receiving end. 

“You’ve kept this from me for two days ?” Bill almost shouts

“What am I going to do?” Yaz hopelessly helps herself to some more cheese infused chili.

“Who initiated it?” Bill continues her crusade of questions. 

“She did.” Yaz mutters. 

“And who… what was… who was...” 

“I’m not telling you that.”  Yaz says when she realises what Bill is insinuating with the way she’s looking at her hands.


“Bill!” Yaz shouts back her name with the same tone.

“Why invite me over if you’re not going to tell me anything?” Bill slumps back.

“I’m freaking out because it’s not like it was just a quick kiss or a declaration of… whatever. It just happened. We were arguing and then she jumped me and I let her.”

“Oh so it was like a hate sex thing.” Bill picks up her abandoned serving again. “This is really tasty by the way.”

“Not really.” Yaz shrugs. She dips the point of her crisp into the blob of guacamole closest to her. “Is it hate sex if you can’t tell if you hate it?”

“Oh no.” Bill sighs. “Now I understand the comfort food.” 

“I don’t know what to do.” Yaz grumbles. 

“I think talking to her might help.”

“Yes because all of our conversations go down well.”

“What are you actually afraid of Yaz?” Bill asks. "That the schools going to find out you had almost-sex in a changing room or the fact you might want to do that stuff again with Doctor Smith?"

“That I might want to do it again.” The words slip out her mouth without warning and Yaz is taken by surprise by her own certainty. “Don’t.” She says, shifting the tray on her lap so that she can eat the rest of it for herself. 

Yaz holds off as long as possible before entering the weekly staff meeting on Monday morning. She doesn’t want to go in. She doesn’t want to speak to her department and have to lie about where she went Friday night. She doesn’t want anyone to look at her and see the bruising just above her eye that will connect her to Doctor Smith. She doesn’t want anyone to talk to her about Doctor Smith. It’s only when Donna steps up on stage Yaz steps inside. She can’t make it to where her department is sitting so she stands at the side with her back against the wall, hoping it will almost make her invisible. 

“Okay, good morning everyone.” Donna says. The room falls silent. “Not much to say today. The Science versus P.E football match raised £478 which is brilliant. Fantastic display of sportsmanship on Friday even if it did result in a couple of black eyes.”

There’s a shuffling motion on the other side of the room that draws Yaz’s eyes towards it. Members of her department are pushing and poking Doctor Smith teasingly with her smiling as she stands there. She still has her bruise too. Their eyes lock together and the smile falls off Doctor Smith’s face. Yaz feels Bill slide up next to her for support. Or maybe just to stop her from doing something stupid.

“New break duty rotas have been sent out- any problems please email the appropriate staff.” I think that’s it for today.” 

Everyone in the room takes that as an informal dismissal and since they’ve finished literally so early everyone is using the opportunity to have a casual chat. Yaz would go to her form room, but Doctor Smith would turn up there at one point or another. So, she tries to start a conversation with Bill. Her mouth is open for a fraction of a second when she hears her name being called. She knows exactly who it is.

“Miss Khan.” 

Yaz turns to leave but Bill blocks her way. “I can’t-”

“Miss Khan.” Doctor Smith calls again.

“Yes you can.” Bill says and she almost pushes Yaz towards Doctor Smith as she does. 

Yaz stands sheepishly while Bill disappears and she waits for Doctor Smith to take the last few steps towards her. She can feel the nerves rattling around her body and her thoughts equally doing the same inside her skull. 

“Hi.” Doctor Smith says. 

“Hi.” Yaz says back. A common courtesy. 

“Can we…” Doctor Smith nods to the glass doors at the back of the school hall and Yaz blindly follows her out away from their boss and the rest of their colleagues. It feels like so many of them are staring at them leaving together. They get just outside the hall  “We need to talk about this.” 

“No we don’t.” Yaz refuses as a way of defending her own emotions. 

“We do.” 

“You’re the one that kissed me.” Yaz senses herself getting her back up in an action of defense. Stop, she tries to calm herself down. Now isn’t the time.

“You kissed me back.” Doctor Smith says. Her voice is too loud for Yaz’s liking.

“We can’t talk about this here. We could get fired.” Yaz hisses. 

“What for just a kiss?” 

“We both know that what happened was not just a kiss.” Yaz says. 

“And I feel bad about it. I should have stopped I- I should have made sure you were okay I should’ve-.”

“Yaz!” The glass door behind them squeaks open and Mr Smith bounces up to the two of them, imposing himself on their conversation. Yaz throws Doctor Smith a look that says ‘we’re not finished’ then acknowledges that her brother is there. 

“Hi… John.” Yaz says, unsure of how she’s meant to make herself sound. 

“How are you? Interesting game on Friday, right?” He grins. 

“You could say that.” Yaz exhales a shaky laugh, refusing to let her eyes drift over to Doctor Smith.

“Hope you celebrated the win. Jess just sulked all weekend, almost like she was having a crisis.”

“Shut up!” Doctor Smith goes to stomp on his foot but Mr Smith is smart enough to know it’s coming and steps sideways like it’s nothing. 

“What? You were- ow!” He doesn’t manage to jump out of the way of Doctor Smith’s fingers pinching the skin on his neck. 

“Doctor Smith, can I have a word with you in your lab please.” Yaz says. If she lets the two of them continue to bicker like children, she and Doctor Smith will never get the chance to address the elephant in the room today and it has to be today. The conversation has started now and Yaz needs it to finish it in one go to be able to live with herself. 

At the speed Yaz is walking it only takes them two minutes to get to L13, Yaz opening the door since she’s ahead, leading Doctor Smith like a dog handler taking her dog back to its kennel. 

“Did you tell him?” Yaz asks once they’re inside and alone. She doesn’t even bother to wait until the door is shut. 


“Did you tell him?” Yaz repeats her question with a matter of urgency.

“Yes.” Doctor Smith admits and Yaz feels the stress levels in her body rise. 

“Great that makes three.” She sighs.

Three?” Doctor Smith leans towards her in shock with wide eyes that are asking who the other two people are. 

“I told Bill.” Yaz says. 

“You told someone else and yet you want to have a go at me for telling my own brot-”

“Martha knows too.” Yaz says. She doesn’t care that Doctor Smith was just attempting to start yet another argument with her. 

Doctor Smith goes quiet as she tries to figure out how the nurse could possibly know. “You mean-”

“She saw.” Yaz nods, making a nervous fist in front of her mouth. “I don’t know how much but she saw.”

“Oh… shit.” Doctor Smith groans and crosses her arms in front of her forehead so that she can comfortably rest her head against one of the student desks. Yaz really really should not be intrigued by how her body looks bent over a table but everything is so messed up in her head anyway she doesn’t have time to unpack all that. Doctor Smith lifts herself up again looking totally and utterly defeated. Yaz watches as she lifts her arms in a kind of shrugging motion and opens her mouth to speak again. “I can’t say I regret it.”

Her unfiltered honesty makes blood flush hot in Yaz’s cheeks. 

“I can’t talk about this with you while we’re at work.” Yaz decides. Her form will be here in a minute. She needs to start up the computer and get ready and act like everything in her life is normal today when it’s not. 

“Wait!” Doctor Smith manages to take Yaz’s hand, preventing her from moving any further away. Yaz stares at it. Both their hands together. In some ways it freaks her out more than the initial reason why they’re having this conversation. “Yaz.” 

Yaz looks up. Doctor Smith’s face is soft and vulnerable in front of her. This is new. 

“Jess.” Yaz says. Her name. Her proper name feels fuzzy on her tongue like the centre of a lemon sherbet exploding. Looking at her with the addition of her hand in hers words rise up in her throat and Yaz doesn't push them back down. She lets them fall out in a whisper. “I want to kiss you again.”

Jess holds Yaz’s hand a little bit tighter. “Me t-”

The door to the lab flies open and Mr Smith tumbles in with it. He stomps his feet as he catches himself from going arse over tit and clears his throat as he stands up straight. Yaz lets go of Doctor Smith’s hand out of fear of being seen and equally Doctor Smith jumps back away from her. Mr Smith steadies himself, his eye jumping from his sister to Yaz his sister to Yaz his sister to the door.

“That’s a- that’s a very good new door. Nice handle very… very solid. Robust.” He coughs again and shoves his hands in his pockets. “I’m gonna go collect some money from Miss Oswald.” 

He wanders off not looking at either of them again, whistling a tune as he goes. 

“I’ll kill him one day.” Doctor Smith says once the door shuts again. “Can we talk somewhere people we know aren’t going to listen in at the door? Or interrupt- or anything?” 

“My house.” Yaz says. It’s not neutral territory but it’s where Yaz would feel most safe talking to her. 

“You- your house?” Doctor Smith does a double take at the offer. 

Yaz reaches over to the teachers desk and steals a sticky note and a pen to scribble down her address. 

“Come at five.” Yaz says, holding the note out in front of her for Doctor Smith to take if she wishes. Doctor Smith takes the note and nods like she can’t believe it. 

“Until then Miss Khan.” She says, trying to compose herself. 

They’re stuck. Both of them standing and staring at each other not knowing what else to say. Still very much alone with each other. Yaz can see Doctor Smith refraining from looking at Yaz’s lips. Yaz herself isn’t as controlled and ends up searching the body in front of her for signs of what to do. Do it now, the little voice in her head makes an appearance. Kiss her. Look at her face, she wants you to kiss her. Kiss her. Do it. Do. It. 

Overwhelmed by the pressure her thoughts are putting on her Yaz crumbles under their demands. Doctor Smith, clearly on the same wavelength, holds out her arms ready to catch her. But she never gets there.

The bell rings.

“Doctor Smith.” Yaz steps away and nods. Why did I just do that?

“Miss Khan.” Doctor Smith does the same, leaving the room entirely. 

Yaz finds herself making absolutely no effort to dress up for Doctor Smith’s visit. She wears the sweatpants she spent all of the weekend in and her hoodie. No tshirt, no bra, hell she would have put on her PJs if she could. It’s just what she’s comfortable wearing and she needs that comfort right now. It’s her house, but similarly, it’s her problem that she’s going to have to deal with. 

The knock on the door comes at five to five. Early, but Yaz doesn’t mind. It just means it’ll be over with sooner. Yaz opens the door to find Doctor Smith smiling awkwardly and holding a box.

“I brought Capri Suns.” Doctor Smith says.

“You remembered?” Yaz smiles and steps aside to let Doctor Smith in. She closes the door behind her guest while she kicks off her boots. 

“Yeah. I don’t drink either so I thought-”

“This isn’t a date, Doctor.” Yaz feels the need to remind her. 

“Your tongue has been in my mouth, please just call me Jess.” Jess mumbles. 

“Okay.” Yaz nods- flushed and embarrassed already.

“And I know it’s not a date.” Jess hands her the box of squash. “They should still be cold-ish.” 

Yaz welcomes her to her home as graciously as she can, considering, and leaves Doctor- Jess in her living room while she goes and puts the box of drinks in her fridge. 

“You have a hamster?” Jess asks.

“Yeah.” Yaz hands her a juice packet. 

“I’d’ve got a fish.” Jess says. 

Yaz lets her lips form a small smile at the coincidence as she moves over to the sofa, sitting with her legs tucked underneath her and one of her arms draped across the back. Jess comes and sits on the other side, mirroring Yaz’s sitting position but letting her legs dangle over the side rather than sit on them. Both of them punch the foil seal with their straws and silently take a sip. 


“How do we-”

They speak at the same time and both laugh quietly, turning their head back to their drinks and taking another long sip through the straw during the awkward silence. Yaz doesn’t know how to start a conversation like this let alone pick it up from where they left it this morning. It should be easier to talk about than this. Yaz looks up from the space between them on the sofa to find Jess with the orange straw between her lips, just looking at her. 

“You’re looking at me funny.” Yaz says. 

“Am I?” Jess’s brow knots into a frown. Yaz reckons she can probably make a second face out of how doughy it is. 

“Yeah you’re kind of… staring.” Yaz shifts where she sits. She can’t tell if she’s uncomfortable or just afraid to talk to her. 

“Sorry I just- I don’t think I’ve ever seen you out of work attire before.”

Yaz chokes on her drink and places the packet down on the coffee table. “I mean, you have.”

“Oh! No I mean-” Jess abandoned her drink as well so that she can speak with her hands. Does she teach like this? Is she seeing a whole new side to her? “you just- you’re um- you’re really beautiful.” 

“Jess how have we gone from shouting at each other in toilets to this? I honestly can’t figure it out.” Yaz cuts out all the crap, deciding they can’t keep going on like nothing else has happened the last few months. “You said you weren’t like this before I came to the school. What did that mean?”

Now Jess shuffles uncomfortably. Yaz finds it weird to watch her. It’s still weird to refer to her as ‘Jess’ and not Doctor Smith. It’s weird that she’s sitting in her front room and it’s weirder that Yaz doesn’t mind it as much as she thought she would.

“I started to feel… I feel… you make me feel a lot of things and I don’t know what to do with them.” Jess says. She can’t keep eye contact for more than two words at a time. 

“So you were just miserable towards me, for what? Fun?”

“No I…” Jess tries to think of the right words and it shows on her face. “I… am… very very attracted to you physically but mentally I’ve convinced myself I have to hate you because I thought you hate me. If that makes sense.” 

“I think I’m the same.” Yaz says straight away, not letting herself overthink it. She moves closer, intrigued as to how Jess will respond and where the conversation will go from here. “You don’t really hate me, you were just so attracted to me you didn’t know what to do?”

“I mean, don’t flatter yourself too much but yes.” Jess says.

“I’ve always wanted to know you properly but you’ve just been so defensive it was easier to decide to hate you and now we’re stuck.” Yaz hopelessly laughs at how ridiculous they’ve been. 

“So what do we do about it?” Jess asks. 

Yaz raises her eyes devilishly.

Do it, the voice from this morning reappears. Not as urgent, but still there. She doesn’t rush this time when their lips touch. It’s soft and sweet but when Yaz cups her cheek with her hand and Jess gasps she can’t resist gently slipping her tongue slip past her lips. She tastes exactly the same, just more sugar and less blood, and Yaz wants more. She switches sides just to move their lips together that bit longer before she remembers this is Doctor Smith and she really shouldn’t be enjoying it. Yaz pulls back, just to check she’s okay. From the delayed reopening of her eyes Yaz reckons she’s pretty okay.

“Okay, that works.” Jess whispers. She bites her own lip and Yaz knows what’s coming next. “I haven’t stopped thinking about Fri-”

“Do something then.” Yaz demands. 

She thought it would take a lot more than a few firm words to get Jess to do what she wants but it works. Yaz’s leg gets tugged so that it’s resting between Jess’s thighs and they kiss and grope and pull at each other like they’re each other’s water source in a desert. Any outsider would think it looks like they’re trying to murder each other rather than take part in foreplay. Yaz shoves off the braces and pulls on Jess’s shirts wanting nothing more than to see her almost naked again and maybe a little bit more. Jess’s warm hands equally find their way under Yaz’s hoodie and it isn’t until her hands touch the underside of her boobs her eyes snap open as she realises what it feels like. 

“For me?” Jess raises her eyebrows, looking pleased with herself.

“No. I didn’t- I wasn’t- I hadn’t planned that we would-  I just-”

Jess attaches her mouth to Yaz’s throat making her whine in addition to her hands massaging her boobs. Handsy. That’s her new way to describe her. Handsy and so far very good with her mouth. 

“Wait wait wait wait wait-” Jess breathlessly pushes Yaz away from her and Yaz can’t figure out what’s going to come out of her mouth next. “Before I kissed you- the first time- you started saying something. What was it?”

“You’re asking me that now?”

“Yes, your answer might change my mind.” Jess stands behind her question.

“I was going to say I’m actually starting to not mind being around you. At times.” Yaz reveals.

Yaz chooses to ignore the implications of that statement and lets her bodily needs take over completely. She reaches out and feels hard nipples through fabric, urging her on to awkwardly remove Jess’s bra over her head. Yaz knows exactly where she’s going after that, dipping her head down to take a dusky pink nub between her lips eliciting a deep reaction from inside the both of them. 

“Where’s your bedroom?” Jess asks. Yaz notices the other woman is finding it harder and harder to keep her voice steady. 

“No.” Yaz shakes her head deciding they don’t have time to waste.

“Here?” Jess squeaks.

“Uh-huh.” Yaz nods, pulling back to take off her hoodie that’s not making her sweat more than the idea of having Doctor Smith at her mercy. 


Yaz lets Jess marvel at her body and say her little prayer of thanks to give herself time to figure out how her trousers unclip and shuffle them and her underwear down bright white thighs until they can fall to the floor on their own. Her heart is in her throat as she places her knee between Jess’s legs again to keep them open and part of her questions if she can remember how to do this at all. The second a solitary finger flutters over her clit and Jess releases a moan like Yaz has never heard before her confidence comes flooding back. She takes it one step further and pushes her finger into her with ease. Jess is hot against her finger tip as well as against her ear, softly panting as Yaz pulls her finger almost out and fills her again with a second addition. She moans properly then and Yaz can feel it triggering heat to flush between her own legs. She picks up the pace, letting her thumb bash clumsily against her clit like it’s nothing. 

“I knew you’d be good.” Jess mumbles. 

“You really don’t have to try and flatter me, this is happening.” 

“I know but-”

“Oh my god just shut up.”

Yaz kisses her again to make sure she has no choice but to swallow her words. She grinds her own hips down onto Jess’s leg to chase some kind of release of her own- her remaining clothes are in the way but it’s something for now. Yaz keeps her hand moving fast and consistent, reaching deep enough a few times to make Jess groan from the pit of her guts. All the while Jess remains to be handsy, stroking the curve of Yaz’s backside, her hips, her stomach, her tits, everything to wind her up and get ready for her turn because it is so damn obvious Jess isn’t going to let her just walk away like last time. 

“Slow down.” Jess says all of a sudden, gripping onto Yaz’s shoulder. “Yaz- slow down- I’ll- too soon- I can’t- I’ll-”

“Isn’t that what you wanted me to do in the first place?” Yaz teases by whispering against her earlobe. Jess stays quiet, trying to control herself, so Yaz leaves kisses from the joint of her jaw all around to her chin, bringing her face up to let her see her mouth form the magic command word. “Come.”

Jess can’t hold herself together any longer and Yaz herself moans at the sensation of her inner walls gripping tight to the rhythm of her heart against her fingers. Removing her hand from where heat burns hottest Yaz cleans her wet fingers by letting her tongue and mouth lap over them. Yaz doesn’t note how she tastes as her only motive is to try and get her hand clean to remove the rest of her clothes but the action must have sent the scientist feral as her body is soon being lifted and laid down on the sofa. 

“You’re so fucking sexy.” Jess rids of Yaz’s joggers in a blink of an eye and hooks one of her legs up on her hip. “Please.”

“Don’t think I’m not taking notice of the fact you like to beg.” Yaz warns. She thinks if Jess says please one more time she’ll have to give her something she really has to beg for. 

Jess takes the hint to keep her mouth busy and heads down Yaz’s body, leaving a trail of kisses on her way. Yaz can only watch as Jess covers the whole of her vulva with her mouth and uses her teeth to pinch her underwear and drag it down her legs right to the very end. Suddenly very naked and exposed Yaz realises how much trust she’s actually putting into this woman but she has no more than a millisecond to think about it before she feels the tip of Jess’s tongue flick against her clit. She hisses, oversensitive from not being touched anywhere else down there yet. Jess works so beautifully around her Yaz’s hand flies over her mouth to repress her moan when She swirls over her nerves again. Just as quickly as her arm gets there, Jess’s hand is pulling it away, gripping on her wrist to stop her from ever denying herself from making sounds again.

“Jess.” Yaz says. She doesn’t have anything else to say. Just her name. Just as an encouragement. 

Jess’s hand removes itself from Yaz’s wrist and a finger goes straight into her core so that her mouth can focus on stimulating her clit. Yaz thinks she might explode- she might shout or cry or scream at how good it feels to have someone between her legs paying attention to her needs. If Jess thinks she was quick to finish Yaz is set to be quicker. She can feel it coiling around her entire body like she’s being strangled by barbed wire and Jess is the only one with wire cutters strong enough to cut through. And she snaps, rocking her body against Jess’s face to keep the orgasm rolling through her and to keep Jess’s finger in her for as long as possible. When Jess is finally set free she moves up and lays silently on Yaz’s chest.

“I guess this changes some things.” Jess says. 

“Don’t get smart.” Yaz mumbles.



“What are we calling this?” Jess asks as Yaz follows her into the hallway, fully dressed but with a bad case of post-coitus hair. 

“Nothing because no one’s going to know.” Yaz folds her arms to let her know she’s serious. Not a single soul is going to know about their little arrangement. 

“Bang buddies? Friends with benefits?” Jess suggests while she slips on her boots. 

“We are not friends.” Yaz snorts. 

“Okay fine, what about-”

“Jess, we're just two people that find each other attractive and can’t get it anywhere else.” Yaz cuts her short. It sounds harsh but the truth is often always harsh. 

“So you admit this is going to happen again.” Jess smirks. 

“If you don’t piss me off too much.” Yaz threatens. She knows she’ll probably give in to her anyway but she’s not going to let her know that. 

“Challenge accepted.” Jess smiles as she slips her coat on her shoulders. She’s kind of cute when she smiles.

Yaz opens the door to let her out and in a twist of surprise Jess kisses her again with one hand on her cheek and another on her waist. Yaz’s brain is still mush and she lets her kiss her like it’s nothing before kicking her out with a small wave. 


“You’re in a good mood today.” Bill says. Yaz let herself sleep in so she’s in the canteen to buy some food.

“Am I?” Yaz leans against the counter as far as she can without her head getting burnt by the heat light. 

“Yeah. Miles better than yesterday.” Bill continues to insist that Yaz’s mood has improved greatly. 

“I don’t know what you mean.” Yaz says, placing her finger on the scanner so that Bill can charge her. “Can I have a croissant please.”

“Eating sugar at work? Now I know something’s up.” Bill teases but punches in the cost on screen anyway and hands Yaz the pastry in a napkin.

“Nothing’s up I just-”

Bill coughs suspiciously causing Yaz to stop talking and look behind her. Doctor Smith is striding towards her with a cartoon of juice in her hand that she must have got from the refrigerated section. Yaz gets flashbacks to the night before as she gets closer, thinking about how close they got, how she took off her clothes, how Doctor Smith specifically took her underwear off. She has a certain spring to her step too and Yaz hopes Bill isn’t picking up on it. 

Instead of asking Yaz to move so that she can get to the finger scanner she grabs a bacon butty as well and leans in towards Yaz. her scent fills all of Yaz’s senses and it’s hard to keep her poker face. Once her finger is scanned and Bill has said she’s paid Doctor Smith stabs her drink with a straw. Only now does Yaz notice: it’s a Capri Sun. 

“Good morning Miss Khan.” She says, sipping on her juice. 

“Doctor Smith.” Yaz finds it impossible to hide a slight smile at how brazen the other is being. 

Doctor Smith walks off like nothing happened, leaving Yaz to fall under the cursed stare of her friend on the other side of the counter. 

“So.” Bill says. 

“So?” Yaz asks. 

“So.” Bill repeats. 

“What?” Yaz bites into her croissant so that whatever Bill asks next she’ll have a reason to have a delayed response. 

“What’s up with that?” Bill asks. Yaz chews until she can’t anymore, swallows, and is unable to think of any kind of acceptable answer so she takes another bite. Bill stares at her with a look of shock and at the same time disappointment. “Tell me you didn’t.”

“It’s just sex.” Yaz shrugs, keeping her voice low. 

“Just sex?” Bill raises her eyebrows, obviously not believing her. 

“Just sex.” Yaz nods. 

“Are you sure?”

“Yes!” Yaz opens her eyes and her arms wide to drive home her point. It’s not like she can shout it in the middle of a canteen already starting to accommodate a few of the teenage students. 

“Bet that’s what you sounded like last night.” Bill teases, collecting a new bun to cut in half and make another bacon sandwich. 

“I will throw these cornflakes at you.” Yaz says, grabbing the small single potion box in front of her. 

“Careful mate don’t get too close to the cornflakes, you might lose your appetite for her.”

Yaz grins and her friend taking the piss and throws it just hard enough to hit Bill in the chest. 

“What’s up? Why are you throwing my cereals?” Rose arrives to help Bill start serving more kids as the buses are starting to turn up. 

“Yaz had sex with-”

“Ssssh! We’re in a school!” Yaz tries to hush her into silence but silence is wishful thinking.

“That didn’t stop you the first time.” Bill says. 

“Whoa hold on I’m- I don’t understand what we’re talking about?” Rose asks. Yaz would be just as lost if she had entered this conversation at the same stage. 

“Yaz slept with Doctor Smith.” Bill says. Yaz just bites down into her breakfast again.

“Well shit.” Rose says, not looking very shocked or taken back at all. “I owe John money.”