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LOST MEMORIES

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Everything was all set for Gulf and his friends departure going back to the city. Gulf's stuff was already inside his luggage, except for two things, his picture frame with Mew and their couple bracelet. For the last time, Gulf stared at their photo together before placing it back on the nightstand. His gaze then fell upon his bracelet that he was wearing around his wrist. He caressed the bracelet before he slowly removed it and placed it on the night stand beside the frame.

"Are you sure you're going to leave that here?" Gulf's door was left open making Tong to witness the whole scene. He walked towards Gulf as he dropped the question.

When he heard the older's voice, he turned around to see Tong entering his room. "P'Tong..."

"Are you done packing?"

"Hmm, I'm done."

"But..." The older looked at the things that Gulf left on the nightstand. "What about those?"

"P'Tong..." He cutely pouted as he looked at the older. "Please throw it for me, Pi."

"Throw?" Raising his brows as he asked in shock.

"I don't have enough time to do it, Pi. There's too much stuff to pack. I spent most of my time last night packing all my things."

"Then why didn't you pack those things as well?"

Gulf sighed. "Pi..."

"These are important to you, right?"

"Not anymore, Pi. I already told you guys last night that I've decided to forget about him. So, it's better to leave these things here."

"Gulf..." Tong faced the younger with a serious look on his face. "Are you really sure about this?"

"I've thought about this a lot. I'm going back to the city. I'll be going back to work. I'll be busy. I'm sure I'll get through it."

The older stayed silent for a moment before he slowly nodded his head at Gulf. "I didn't know you're this strong."

"Of course I am~"

"Make sure you won' regret this."

"I won't Pi."

With an encouraging smile plastered on Tong's face, he gave the younger a nod. "Okay, let me help you carry your things."

Tong helped Gulf carry all his stuff going out of the house. Gulf let Tong left the room first, then he roamed his eyes around the room. Time flies so fast, he thought. A month ago, he arrived at the province with a heavy feeling in his heart because he was just forced to go there. But now, he still have that feeling but it wasn't the same reason as before.

For a month of staying at the province, it was one of the best experiences that he had in his life. If he's going to omit the sad part, he's happy because he got to spend a lot of time with his friends and also Tong. And also, he met First. Thinking about it, it made him sad because he's going to leave such a lovely place, but he needed to. Gulf took a last glance of his bracelet and the picture frame on the nightstand. A small smile crossed on his face before he turned around and left the room.

Outside, Mild was sniffing while putting their stuff inside the car with Boat. Tong also came with Gulf's luggage and paper bags, he handed it to Mild and when he noticed the younger sniffing, he snorted.

"Run, what's wrong with him?" Tong asked as he stood beside Run.

Run let out a soft chuckle first, before he answered. "He wanted to stay here, P'Tong. He said that he enjoyed staying here and he didn't want to leave."

"Aw! You guys can come back here anytime. Our house is open for you."

"Right! You guys are welcome to come back here." Tong's mother agreed as soon as she heard their conversation when she was heading out of the house with her husband and Gulf.

"We rarely have visitors. We'd love to accommodate you guys if you plan your vacation here again." Tong's father added.

"Last night, we talked and agreed to come here next year." Boat commented after he and Mild gathered with them.

"Or maybe before this year ends." Mild added with a sniff. "If we can get another vacation leave from our company."

And they all laughed.

"Calm down now." Gulf comforted his friend. "We'll be back here for sure."

"Are you sure?" His friends said in unison.

While they were packing their things last night, Run suddenly brought up New in their conversation and Gulf's face changed drastically after it was mentioned.

They were all interested about New, what's Gulf's plan about him. They all stared at him including Tong, because he wanted to know it as well. Gulf finally opened up to his friends and Tong about his talk with Kaownah. It made them furrowed their brows since they've never seen Gulf talking to Kaownah alone. But when Gulf told them that Kaownah came face to face to talk to him, they got amused.

Gulf told them how Kaownah kneeled and begged in front of him, asking him to let go of New. His friends were furious especially Mild, who wanted to storm out of the room and go to Kaownah's house. He also mentioned about Kaownah's illness and Boat asked him back if he believed Kaownah, in which Gulf turned silent afterwards.

All they could do was to let out a deep breath, expressing their dismay at Gulf. Their friend is kind and innocent, he easily believes in everything. So they were upset at Kaownah for manipulating their friend just to get what he wanted. Gulf explained to them everything on why he agreed at Kaownah's plead. He wanted to move on as well and finally let go of all the pain because that's the reason why he was in the province in the first place. Gulf said that he wanted to start a peaceful life once he got back in Bangkok. In the end, they respect Gulf's decision and gave him their support and encouragement, telling him that he's not alone and they're always there for him.

He rolled his eyes at his friends before saying. "Forget it, let's leave now."

The three just shook their heads at their friend who avoided the topic. They approached Tong's parents afterwards, giving them a hug as they thanked them. Also Tong, he received a warm hug from Mild, Boat, and Run. The three of them were really naughty and playful, but when it comes to friendship, they always give their everything. Just like how they left their jobs in Bangkok for a while to accompany Gulf at the province. It amazed him since no one have ever done it for him.

Next to them was Gulf, just like what they did, he embraced tightly the elders and expressed his gratitude to the two before his gaze fell on Tong. Thinking about the older, a sad smile crossed on his face and he launched himself to the older with a pout.

Seeing the two hugging each other, Tong's parents looked at them in an awe. The last time they see Gulf and Tong that close was when they were still kids. They could see that Tong treated the younger so well while Gulf was staying at the province.

"P'Tong~ I will miss you. Thank you for being a big brother to us, for taking care not just only me but to the four us."

Tong was really glad and he smiled while listening to the younger. "I will miss you also. Don't be sad. I'm going to see the four of you after two weeks."

"After two weeks?" He pulled away from the hug and looked at Tong. "You're going to the city??"

"Yes!"

"Tong will take his masters degree in Bangkok, not here in the province. His exam will be two weeks from now." Tong's mother said.

"And we already asked your parents to let him stay at your house while he is there." His father added.

Gulf and his friends smiled widely after knowing that they could still meet the older in the city.

"Really?!" Gulf exclaimed. "I'll look forward to that. Then... I'll prepare your room as well, so that you'll be comfortable while staying with us."

"Aw! There's no need to do that, I can just sleep on the couch."

"If Gulf let you sleep on the couch, you can call us Pi." Mild suggested.

"We can give you a nice room." Boat added.

"Let's see when I go there." Tong stated. "Okay, you guys talk a lot. You should get in the car now."

With a laugh, they obliged and got inside the car. As soon as they got inside, Gulf kept on roaming his eyes around. And with that, Tong followed to where the younger was looking and asked. "Why? Are you waiting for someone, Gulf?"

"Hmm, it's... First. He said he would come to send us off."

"Ohh~ let's wait for him for a while."

"Maybe not Pi..." There was a reluctancy from Gulf's voice as he answered the older. "It's getting late already."

"Are you sure? We can wait for him for five minutes, Gulf." Run said.

But before Gulf could give an answer, he heard First calling his name. And he saw him, running while breathing heavily. "Gulf! Wait!"

He got off from the car. "First?"

"Oh! First, you're panting. Are you okay?" Tong's mother asked when he saw the younger breathing heavily.

"I'm fine aunty." He answered with a smile, then he looked at Gulf. "I'm sorry, I'm late."

"They're almost leaving already." Tong commented.

"Sorry Pi." Then he reached his hand to Gulf as he gave him a soccer ball. "Here, that's for you."

"A soccer ball?" Gulf raised an eyebrow. "What's with the soccer ball?"

"It's... just... hmm..." First stuttered as he tried to think of a good answer. "Whatever! I gave you that because I can't think of anything as a gift."

"Ohh~ I see." Gulf cooed and nodded his head. "Thanks." Then he hugged First and whispered in his ear. "Thank you for being there when I need someone."

First was taken a back when Gulf hugged him and when he heared Gulf whispering in his ears, he smiled and nodded his head afterwards. "You're always welcome."

The two broke away from the hug when they heard their friends clearing their throats. Tong's parents were smiling at them while the rest were roaming their eyes around, like their eyes were avoiding Gulf and First's sweet moment. They shook their head, Gulf thanked First once again before he got inside the car.

"Run, be careful in driving, okay?" Tong's father reminded him.

"Yes, uncle. I will."

"We'll get going now, see you soon!" Mild exclaimed.

"Gulf, send my regards to your parents." Tong's mother said.

"I will aunty. Thank you!"

They waved goodbye at each other, then Run started the engine and drove away going out of the gate. When they were already at the main road, they said goodbye once again, before Run drove away. Tong, his parents, and First, let out a deep sigh while staring at the car slowly fading from their sight.

 

Sad look were painted on their faces after they started their journey going back to Bangkok. They really had good memories at the province and they wished to just stay like that always. As they took their path going back, Gulf who was holding the soccer ball that First gave him, stared at it and noticed a message written on the ball. His brows furrowed in curiosity then he read the message.

Hope you won't cry the next time I see you.  - First

And he finally got it why First gave him the soccer ball. It was the reason why they met each other. He was crying that time and First suddenly appeared out of nowhere, holding his soccer ball. He smiled and looked out of the window. Gulf then thought about Mew when he saw the beach outside and it reminded him his last trip with Mew. Though he felt sad for not being able to bring him back, he was happy that he spent a day with the older for the last time.

"Gulf?" They were all silent when Mild called Gulf's name. "Are you really sure that we won't bring P'Mew back?"

Boat and Run took a glance at Gulf as they waited for his answer.

"I know, we've talked about it last night. But I just want to make sure. We can still go back."

"I'm sure, P'Mild." He turned to look at Mild sitting at the backseat with Boat.

"You don't really have to keep that promise with Kaownah, Gulf." Boat commented as well.

"Promise is a promise, P'Boat. It shouldn't be made to be broken."

"What about his family?" It was Run.

"His family... I planned to tell them when I got back. I can't keep this information from them." He answered. "And if they don't believe me, I need you guys to testify."

"And after that?" Mild was eager to hear more of it.

"I'll give them his location in Surat Thani and from there, it's all up to them. Surely, they'll find him and bring him back. But... I don't want to be part of his life anymore. My role as his fiance has finally ended already last night."

"Do you think you're really doing the right thing, Gulf? Why do you put someone else's happiness first before your own?"

Gulf didn't answer. He already talked to his friends about that matter and Gulf thought that he's done explaning everything to them. He stayed silent and looked out of the window instead of answering Mild's question. When they receive nothing from Gulf, Boat waved his hand at Mild, cueing him to just stop asking.

 

 

 

Breathing heavily,  New ran as fast as he could from Kaownah's house going to the cafe to stop Gulf from leaving and to tell him that he got his memories back. But when he arrived there, the cafe was closed. He went to the bar, but he only saw the staff and not Tong. He then ran going to the older's house and pressed the doorbell nonstop.

Inside, Tong, his parents, and First were talking at the living room when they heard the nonstop ring from their doorbell. They all glanced at each other, then Tong's parents asked him to check who it was. His parents thought that maybe it was Gulf and his friends came back because they've left something.

Meanwhile, Tong thought that someone was playing with their door bell. And so he came out with an annoying look on his face and prepared himself to vent out his anger. But to his surprise, it was New, panting as he pressed the doorbell continuously and waited for someone to open the gate.

"P'Tong! Finally!" He exclaimed as soon as he saw the older after searching him everywhere.

"New?" Tong muttered in confusion and he glanced at the ziplock bag that New was holding then going back to the younger. "What are you doing here?"

"Pi, where is Gulf? I need to talk to him."

Tong's confused face turned into a sad look when New asked about Gulf. New was already too late. He put on a small smile on his face and said. "They've left already, New."

His shoulders dropped after finding out that Gulf had left already. He needed to talk to the younger and sort things out. But how? He tried to think of what to do next and there's no other way but to follow Gulf to Bangkok.

"New, are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Pi. But, I need to go now."

When he was about to run once again, to go back home, get his things, and go to the train station, Tong suddenly held him. "Wait wait, where are you going?"

"I will go to Bangkok."

"Now? But the last trip going to Bangkok will leave soon. You can't make it on time." Tong could see the dismay on New's face. "Calm down, okay? Tell me. What happened? Why do you want to see Gulf?"

With downcast eyes, New glanced at Tong, then his eyes moved swiftly from Tong to the ziplock bag that he was holding. Tong looked at it as well and he saw the bracelet that was the same as to what Gulf left on the nightstand.

"That bracelet... it's similar to Gulf."

"It's our couple bracelet. I remember I bought this two years ago."

"Two years ag---" Tong came to a halt and with eyes wide he said. "You have your memories back?"

New nodded his head at the older before he slowly launched himself at Tong and cried. Tong was still in the state of being shock, but he hugged New, caressed his back to shushed the younger. He looked like an older brother who's trying to comfort his another younger brother.

Tong took a long time to come back inside, his parents and First got curious and so they followed him outside. There, they saw Tong hugging someone. At first, his parents thought that the man was Tong's lover, but before their son introduced the man he was hugging to them, they all went inside and had their discussion at the living room.

 

 

 

A loud cry was echoing around the house when Kaownah's parents came home. Their housekeeper came towards them and told them that New and Kaownah had a fight. Hearing what their housekeeper said, both of them got totally surprise because in almost a year of being together in the same roof, Kaownah and New had never fought to each other.

Before they could head to their son's room where they could hear him crying, Turbo's car arrived. The younger was in a hurry, he got out from the car as soon as he parked it outside and went inside where he met Kaownah's parents. He told them that he got a call from Kaownah sobbing while asking him to come.

They went upstairs and found Kaownah sitting on the floor as he cried. His mom as well as his dad crouched down on the floor and hugged him.

"Mom, Dad... P'New has left already." Kaownah said in his cry.

"It's okay, my son. It's okay." She replied, caressing her son's back to shush him.

"He left me, mom. What should I do?"

Seeing Kaownah in that state and glancing at Kaownah's laptop on the bed showing New and Gulf's picture, Turbo assumed that the older might know the truth already and had gone to see Gulf. He felt so sad seeing his bestfriend that way, but he knew that Kaownah would overcome the sadness soon. Because he knew that no matter how much Kaownah held on to New, sooner or later, New would know everything and would go back to his real family.

 

 

 

Tong then introduced New to his parents, telling him that he's Gulf's boyfriend and fiance. As expected, his parents were totally shock after knowing that he's alive. They knew him only by his name, but they have never seen him. They were invited to attend Gulf and Mew's wedding. If the wedding took place, then it was supposed to be their first time seeing Gulf's fiance.

Their son also explained that New had an amnesia, the reason why he couldn't go back to his family and stayed in Surat Thani for almost a year. After he introduced New, his parents left them saying that they'll prepare food for their dinner and also to give them time to talk.

"So, all of you know that I am Mew?" He asked while taking a quick glance to First and Tong.

"Well... at first we didn't know." Tong said. "Gulf and his friends hid it from me, not just only me, but from the people around them. Those kids, they talked about their secret like they were the only people in the world, so I accidentally heard it."

"Same as me." First confessed as well. "I heard it first from you and Gulf."

"From me?" New pointed his finger to himself.

"In Khao Sok. Both of you had a talk late at night at the pool. That time, I came down and saw you together. After what I heard, I asked Gulf the next morning and he only told me the same thing. I heard more of it from P'Mild and P'Boat, when I came at the cafe to help Gulf made a cake for you."

"The chocolate cake..." He muttered silently. "But... why did he keep it from me when he could tell you about it."

"Gulf was afraid. He thought that once he told you, you might not believe him and pushed him away. Instead of telling it to you directly, he and his friends planned to help you regain your memories, by showing you things that you might remember. But it didn't work."

"And also, Gulf kept on dreaming about you choosing Kaownah over him. I once witnessed it when he slept at my house."

"My boyfriend slept at YOUR HOUSE?" New repeated, stretching the last two words.

"There's no need to worry. Other than lowering his temperature because he was sick, I didn't do anything anymore. I just took care of him." First defended himself right away.

New squinted his eyes at First before he nodded with a small smile and said. "Thank you for taking care of him."

"You're welcome." He smiled back. "Ohoo~ how unlucky am I. When I wanted to start hitting on Gulf seriously, your memories suddenly came back."

"Oh! Speaking of memories, how did you find out about it all of a sudden?"

With Tong's question, it made New to let out a deep sigh. "Kaownah..." Mumbling that name, a picture of Kaownah pleading him not to leave appeared on his mind. "He knew it, but chose to hide it from me. I used his laptop today and found out that he has been stalking Gulf's social media. I saw a lot of things about us from it, making me to slowly recall everything. That..." He pointed his clothes and bracelet placed on the coffee table in front of them. "...that was my clothes when they found me. He kept it, he said he forgot to give it to me."

"Ohh~ So that's how it was." First stated.

"You know, whether you push him away or not, Gulf was about to tell you everything. The day before you two went out together." Tong stated, ready to reveal the reason why Gulf left without saying anything. "But before it happened, Kaownah came here."

"Here?"

"Yes, here. He confronted Gulf. He kneeled. He cried. He begged. He did everything just to make Gulf keep silent and let you stay here with him." New and First listened attentively to the older as he speaks. "Of course, Gulf didn't agree. But Kaownah said that he has an illness and you're the one who's giving him a reason to live."

"Kaownah is sick?" First immediately asked. "What's his illness?"

The two looked fixedly at New, waiting for his answer. But the look on New's face was telling them that he didn't have any idea about it as well. "I... I've never heard that he has an illness, like a serious illness. I know he has a phobia, but it wasn't that severe."

"Kaownah has a phobia?"

New nodded his head at Tong. "Monophobia. Kaownah is scared of being alone. That's why he always stick to me at home and with Turbo at school. Even in their internship, Kaownah and Turbo worked in the same company. He always needs someone to be with him."

"So it was just a show? Kaownah tricked on Gulf so that he would agree?"

"Well... we can't blame him, First. People with this phobia, they need another person to feel safe. And I think, Kaownah feels safe with New, so he wants to keep him just like how he keep Turbo."

What Tong said was actually true. Kaownah didn't want to lose either Turbo or New, so he's trying his best to keep them. But the younger's biggest fear was finally happening. New left him. After what happened to him and Kaownah earlier that day, New didn't know how was the younger doing. New left him when Kaownah was pleading for him to stay.

 

 

 

 

With his mother hugging him, Kaownah calmed down and fell asleep in his mother's arms. She let her son rest on the bed before she went down to the living room where Turbo and her husband was waiting for her. She sat beside her husband who's sitting on a couch across Turbo.

"How is he?" Her husband asked her.

"He fell asleep." She replied then she shifted her attention to Turbo. "Turbo, do you know anything that's happening? Why did New and Kaownah have a fight?"

"And why is it our son keeps on saying New left him? What does it mean?" Her husband added.

"I'm not really sure, but..." Turbo nervously pursed his lips. "Kaownah is keeping something from P'New. He knows about P'New's past."

"New's past?" She repeated.

Turbo nodded. "He found out that P'New has a fiance before he had an accident in Rayong. And that person was with us when we went to Khao Sok. P'New's fiance is here in Surat Thani."

"Wait, New has a fiance?"

"Yes, uncle. P'New was actually getting married days before his accident. I saw his wedding invitation from his fiance's account."

Kaownah's parents' eyes widened. They looked at each other in shock after what they heard from Turbo. Then she said. "Then... New finally got his memories back after seeing his fiance, right? Why Kaownah is still hiding it?"

"Unfortunately, P'New couldn't remember his fiance. And he's not saying anything to P'New as well. That's why Kaownah hides it. I told him to tell P'New, but he didn't want to. And he even let me promised to keep it as well."

"He? New's fiance is a man?" He asked in which Turbo nodded once again.

"I heard that P'Gulf, P'New's fiance will go back to Bangkok today. I think... P'New just got his memories back and went to see P'Gulf."

Finally realizing what was happening, Kaownah's father heaved a deep breath and said. "That's why. I'm not surprise anymore why my son cried this hard. Even from the start, I know he has a special feeling towards New."

"My husband is right, Turbo. We know it." She agreed. "We're not saying anything, but we know Kaownah sees New not only as a brother. And... this is what we're afraid of. New's situation won't stay like that until the end. We know that, eventually, his memories will comeback and he will leave us to go back to his normal life. And it's finally happening now." Kaownah's mother reached for Turbo's hands and held it. "Other than New, you were the one who's always there for our son. Please, as a mother, can you stay with Kaownah? I don't want his anxiety to reoccur once again and see him suffering just like before."

"We need your help, Turbo. Even though we're here for him, it's not enough for Kaownah especially when we were the reason why he has an anxiety disorder. As his parents, we lack in giving him our attention."

Turbo knew how difficult it was for them to see their son suffering. With an encouraging smile painted on Turbo's face, he stared at Kaownah's parents and nodded his head. Even though they wouldn't plead for his presence, he's still there for Kaownah no matter what.

 

 

 

 

After they had finished eating their dinner which was prepared by Tong's parents, First thanked the elders before he bid goodbye. He promised to come back the next day to accompany Tong in sending New to the train station. When he left, Tong brought New to the guestroom where he could take a rest, it was the guestroom where Gulf was staying.

Once they entered the room, the picture frame and bracelet left on the nightstand had caught New's attention. He slowly walked towards the nightstand and stared at the photo on it.

"Gulf asked me to throw them away." Said Tong while staring at him.

He turned his head to look at the older. "Throw? Why?"

"Last night, when they were packing, the boys asked him about you and Gulf said that... he'll forget about you. For the sake of Kaownah's happiness, he had given up his own."

"Gulf... he always thinks about other people. It's one of the reasons why I love him. He's so pure that I want to protect him from anyone who wants to hurt him." He paused. "But I hurt him."

Tong reached New's shoulder and tapped it. "Don't blame yourself. You lost your memories, I know you didn't mean to hurt him."

Though New couldn't help but to blame himself, he was thankful at Tong for understanding his situation. And he's hoping that just like Tong, Gulf would understand and forgive him as well. He let out a sigh, letting out the heavy burden of guilt that he was carrying. Then he nodded his head.

"And also, New..."

"You can call me Mew, P'Tong. That's really my name."

"Oh, Mew... It feels odd calling you this name." Tong chuckled before he turned serious once again. "Mew, forgive me and the boys for keeping the truth from you." Tong said, apologizing to the younger for keeping what he had known. "We really wanted to tell you that truth, but Gulf had his own reason why he decided to keep it."

"It's okay, Pi. I understand." New smiled reassuringly. "And I'll bring these things tomorrow. No need to throw it away."

"I know you'll say this." Tong snorted. "You should take a rest now. I'll bring you a pair of clothes for you to change. You can also take a shower, I'll just leave the clothes on the bed."

"Thank you, Pi."

"It's nothing." Tong smiled.

The older went out of the room to get some clothes. While he was out, New took a relaxing night shower. And just like what Tong said, he left the clothes on the bed. New temporarily used those clothes after he finished taking a shower.

He roamed his eyes around the room before he sat on the bed and grabbed their photo from the night stand. Before, it was Gulf who used to stare at their picture, but now, it was New's turn. The picture frame that Gulf brought at the province, he remembered that it was the frame that Gulf had in his room.

While staring at the picture, he recalled his accident in Rayong at that night. He was driving going back to Bangkok, smiling as he was thinking of finally seeing Gulf who was really worried at him on that day. He couldn't wait to hold the younger and shower him with lots of kisses all over his face. Mew's attention was focused on the road since it was already dark, but when he reached a road curve, an eight wheeler truck was moving on the wrong lane, approaching his car.

As the truck was rapidly approaching him, he quickly steered his car into the other lane to avoid the truck. But it was too late when the truck forcefully hit the side of his car causing it to whirled around before it hit the roadside barrier, flew over it and fell off the cliff. His car landed in an upside down position on the rocky area with a loud thud. Mew accidentally knocked his head on the steering wheel and on the window, the reason why he lost his consciousness for a moment.

When he woke up, he was hardly breathing but he still mumbled Gulf's name. He searched for his phone, but it was nowhere to be found. Then, Mew smelled the car's gas and noticed that the gas tank was leaking. He was injured, but he knew that he needed to get out of the car or else he would die.

Although he was already weak, Mew tried his best to get out. He thought about his family, friends, and Gulf who's waiting for him. And what gave him more strength was his wedding with Gulf. They promised to stay together for a long time, so he must survive from the danger he was in. And finally, he managed to get out from the car and the next thing that he needed to do was to ask help from the passersby but in order for him to ask help, he must climb going back to the main road.

His eyes were welled up with tears. He felt so weak, exhausted, and he wanted to give up already. But he knew that he needed to fight for his life. "Gulf... I will come back. I promise." He murmured to himself.

Using all of his strength, Mew did his best to climb all the way up to the main road. He climbed as fast as he could to reached the main road on time. And when he reached there, his car exploded afterwards. He stared at it before he started to feel the pain on his head. He touched his head but furrowed when he felt something like liquid, he brought his hand in front of him to check what was it, and found that it was blood.

Help. What he needed at that moment was help, he turned his head from left to right, but he saw no one. He attempted to stand up and find someone who could help him, but he had used up all his strength in climbing up. He fell on his knees, his vision was slowly becoming blurry, then he lost his consciousness and everything went black as soon as his head landed on the ground.

When Mew woke up after the accident, he found himself lying on a hospital bed. He didn't know where he was and who were the people around him. The nurses who were there with him suddenly called someone, and a doctor came. They started talking to him, but he didn't know what they were talking about. He got furious when they kept on asking him and the only thing he could say was 'I don't know'. The doctor and nurses calmed him down and they told him about why he was there at the hospital. They left after they couldn't get any information from him and to give him time to rest as well.

He looked out of the window and there was a bright beam of light suddenly appeared on his mind, the sound of car crashing, and an explosion. He placed both of his hands in each side of his head when it started to hurt.

Then after almost half an hour, two men and a woman came inside his room. Mew stared at them, but he didn't know who were they, until they started introducing themselves as the ones who found him. Not knowing what to do, Mew gave them a wai. They invited Mew to go home with them when no one came searching for him. He agreed to go with them and was given a name New.

And that's how he was away from Gulf for almost a year. Remembering those days, he didn't have any idea about what happened to Gulf after he went missing. A tear suddenly dropped from his eyes but he was quick to wipe it away.

"Boo..." He murmured. The voice that he heard that day when he was in Bangkok with Bosser, he was so sure that it was Gulf. The younger saw him when he went to Bangkok and after a week he met Gulf at the shore.

He sniffed. He remember how he questioned the sadness in Gulf's eyes on that day, without knowing that it was all because of him. Gulf was delighted to see him, but it turned out that he couldn't remember him. He wondered how did Gulf feel about him not being able to remember his lover. It must be really heart breaking for Gulf, he thought.

But since that day, he couldn't stop thinking about Gulf and he had a constant dream about a mysterious man. He even wished to met Gulf again, so he always go to the shore where he met Gulf, but he never saw him anymore. That job advertisement was an instrument for him to see Gulf once again. He thought that the heavens heard his wish because they let him meet Gulf at the cafe. He was so happy after seeing Gulf for the second time, although he couldn't understand his feeling to why he's happy just by seeing the younger. But he was confused at the people working at the cafe, they were all shocked to see him. It's like they saw a ghost when they looked at him. Yes, one of them called him a ghost actually.

An audition was going to happen and he needed to prepare a piece for it. He must win. If he wins and get hired, he could always see Gulf. He searched for a perfect song to be played on stage, a song that could make him win. He found a good song and it was really familiar when he tried to listen to it. But he skipped it and decided to choose a song from his favorite singer.

The song from his favorite singer that he praticed all night became useless. The night before the audition took place, New dreamt of him singing a song to someone, but he didn't know to whom did he sing that song for as the image of that person was blurry. He suddenly woke up from his sleep and he decided to change the song he's going to use for the audition. He listened to that familiar song once again, and chose it as his audition piece because it was the song from his dream.

When he sang that song on stage, he focused at Kaownah to get rid of his nervousness, but it wasn't working at all. He was still nervous. But when his eyes landed on Gulf, he eventually felt comfortable and he was confident enough to sing in front of many people. His lips curved into a smile as he was singing while staring at Gulf.

His hard work was paid off when Tong accepted him as the guitarist at the older's bar. It just meant that he's going to see Gulf always. On his first day of practice with Run, Gulf came with cookies put on a plate. Once he saw the cookies, blurred images started appearing on his mind. It was him, happily baking cookies with someone. They were not only baking because New could also see that he's feeding that person with cookies.

It's not only the cookies that made those blurry images appeared, because when he saw Gulf's bracelet. Another image flashed on his mind, he saw the two bracelet wore by two people. But he didn't see who were they. At night, New dreamt about the cookies and bracelet. He dreamt that he was choosing a bracelet for him and for another person. He's getting confuse already. Since he met Gulf, blurred images have regularly appeared than before. And even his dreams, although it's blurry, they were longer and detailed.

But it wasn't the end of the appearance of images on his mind, because it continued almost everyday. Everytime he's at the cafe, bar, or with Gulf and his friends, he usually recalled something. The first time he had dinner with the people at the cafe, he found out that Gulf loves eating stir fried basil. While Gulf was happily staring at the dish, he muttered loudly the name of the dish which made them to look at him.

He never tried cooking stir fried basil in the province, but when he saw it, he saw a picture of him, cooking that dish with someone. And it was like Mild was reading his mind because Mild just mentioned that he cooked it. Although Mild stopped his statement midway, he still heard him saying that he did cook it.

Leaving the shore and going to the mountain for a short trip was a great idea, but not when Kaownah was there following him. He wanted to spend some alone time with Gulf during the trip, but how when he's with Kaownah. Thankfully, he remembered talking to Tong the night after they had their dinner at the cafe. New opened up his interest in getting closer to Gulf, so he asked help from the older and the older made a promise to help him. During the trip, he could feel that Gulf was taking care of him by being attentive to the food that was given to him. He never tell anyone that he doesn't like spicy food, even Kaownah, but suprisingly, Gulf knew about it. And he wondered how did the younger know.

They went to the jungle and at the end of their trip at the rainforest, Gulf tripped his foot. As soon as he knew about it, he wanted to carry Gulf and take care of the younger by himself. Much to his dismay, First volunteered himself right away. But since Tong didn't forget about him, the older rejected First's offer and asked him to carry Gulf in which he agreed without thinking twice. As expected, New did recall something when he had Gulf on his back. In his memories, he was happily carrying someone on his back just like how happy he was while carrying Gulf. And also, he didn't feel like carrying the younger was something new to him. In fact, he felt like it was a normal thing to do, like he's already used to it.

Not only New had a chance to be with Gulf, but he also had a chance to talk to the younger when he saw him in the middle of the night going out of the house and sat at the pool. Since First's vacation house was located near the lake, the wind was expected to be cold. New quietly went back to his room and grabbed his blanket before he went back downstairs and approached Gulf at the pool area. Instead of calling the younger's name, New decided to slowly place the blanket around him which made Gulf to jolt in surprise.

That night, he knew more about Gulf, but it was also the reason why New's mind was flooded with lots of questions. After their trip in Khao Sok, New found himself sitting at his desk, with a paper and pen in front of him. He tried to take note all the information he got from Gulf from their late night talk. Gulf's fiance's accident and his accident were the same. Gulf's fiance likes water and he likes water as well. But, Gulf's fiance died. At this part, New wrote a question mark on it. Behaving in a paranoid manner, New started suspecting Gulf's fiance. He had a strange feeling that this man, wasn't dead at all.

As a part of his monthly routine, New went to the hospital with Bosser. He couldn't drive after his accident, so Bosser always sent him to the hospital to accompany him. Approaching the entrance, someone accidentally bumped into Bosser and when he looked at the person, he was shocked to see Gulf. Gulf at the hospital? Why? When he asked, the younger just told him that he went to check on his foot. But when New arrived at the office of his doctor, Mr. Chantaviriyavit, the doctor suddenly shared to him about a man who came just before New to consult about amnesia. New, who was curious, tried describing Gulf's appearance to his doctor. And to his surprise, the doctor acknowledged Gulf as the person who came to ask about amnesia. He's starting to formulate questions again, on why Gulf was interested about it. Gulf was keeping something and New wanted to know what was it.

The candlelight dinner that Gulf made for New had gone wrong. New made a big mistake to Gulf. He hurt the younger when Gulf caught him almost kissing with Kaownah. When Gulf went missing, the only thing that New wanted to do at that time was to find Gulf and clear everything to the younger. So he waited at the cafe, sitting at the table that Gulf set up for them. But Gulf never came back. Tong advised him to go back home and take a rest instead of waiting there the whole night. At first, he disagreed and insisted to wait for Gulf. But at the end, he obliged and went back home with the cake that Gulf baked for him. Tong gave it to him since it was really made for New.

New took a few bites of the cake that Gulf baked for him before sharing it to the people in the house. On the same night, he dreamt about the same dream that he had before. He was at the temple, making merit by feeding cows, and someone suprised him with a chocolate cake at the temple. In his dream, he was so happy while blowing the candle and gave that someone a hug. New suddenly woke up in the middle of night with tears in his eyes. He suddenly felt like missing someone, but he didn't know who.

In the morning, he went to the cafe to see if Gulf came back, but still he wasn't there. And just like what he did the previous night, he waited for Gulf. When Gulf's friends came, Mild started venting out his anger at him. But he couldn't fight back, because he was really the one to be blamed. Then, Mild started saying things that made him curious, confused, and made his head hurt. They turned silent when Gulf suddenly arrived, stopping Mild from continueing his statement. It's like Mild had something important to say that he needed to know, but Gulf forbade Mild to say and forbade him to know.

Days had passed and Gulf never showed up in front of New again. New missed seeing the younger. Everytime he has to play at Tong's bar, Gulf was always there to watch him. But Gulf might not want to see him anymore after what happened. He then focused himself on practicing, but he could feel that there's something off. He could feel that someone was staring at him. Because of that, New lifted his head and roamed his eyes around before he saw someone standing from a far, staring at him. It was the person he wanted to see the most, it was Gulf. When New saw the younger, he wanted to jump in happiness. He wanted to approach him, hug him, and apologize to him after what happened. But to his surprise, Gulf walked towards him and when he tried to bring up what happened, the younger told him that he already forgot about it. To show that New was really sorry, Gulf suggested the older to go on a trip with him, only the two of them together. Upon hearing it from Gulf, of course, New agreed right away.

It would be his first time going out with Gulf, like they were on a date, so New wanted everything to be perfect. He suggested to the younger that they should plan on what to do with their trip together. After New's practice, they stayed at the cafe and made a plan. Tong and Gulf's friends, were at the counter staring at the two as they gossiped about them.

In front of the heart-shaped mountain, New had the courage to ask Gulf to be his boyfriend. New was really serious at that time, but the younger didn't take it seriously and said that they would become a couple only for a day. Although it disappoints New, he just go with it. New thought that a confession in front of the sunset was really romantic, so when they sat on the sand and watch the sunset, it was when New decided to make a move. He held Gulf's face, he promised to be with the younger for a long time and sealed it with a kiss. But when they kissed, hundreds of memories flashing on his mind and it ended with a voice making him to unintentionally pushed the younger, breaking their kiss. He apologized and said that he suddenly got a headache when he wasn't because he couldn't tell Gulf the real reason why he did it.

On their way home, New kept on staring at Gulf. They had their first kiss at the beach, but he didn't feel like it was their first kiss at all. Gulf's lips were so familiar to New. He also thought about the voice that he mentally heard, he didn't know whose voice was that, but he has a strong feeling that he always heard that voice everyday. Thinking about all those things, he couldn't help but to stare at Gulf.

Their trip was memorable to New, they've got to enjoy a lot of things together, but it didn't end happily when Gulf cut ties with him later that night just to make someone else happy. New remembered how much he cried at the shore after Gulf left him. He cried so hard that he fell his knees on the ground. He was so broken. All he wanted was for Gulf to come back to him. But after finding out the truth, he realized that it wasn't Gulf who needed to come back. It was him.

Tears continued to drop from his eyes as he hearkened back to days when he still had his amnesia. His head was throbbing the whole time but he couldn't bring himself to care about it. Back when he was talking with First and Tong at the living room, he heard Tong telling him that Gulf and his friends' plan to regain his memories never worked and that was wrong. It did work, New thought. All those plans made him recalled lots of memories, the problem was that they were all unclear. New also tried his best to connect all those memories he recalled and to find the mystery man in his dreams, but he always thinks that his disease was too powerful for him to beat it. He once suspected himself as Gulf'a fiance, but never told Gulf about it because he didn't want to assume things.

Until he finally uncovered the truth by himself  and all of his questions were finally answered. Why Gulf was so familiar to him? Why Gulf made him remember hundreds of memories everytime they were together? And that's because Gulf was the missing piece of his incomplete puzzle.

He placed the frame back on the night stand, wiped his tears before he laid himself on the bed and drifted himself to sleep. He has a long day waiting for him because he would be finally coming back home.