You groaned and sat up, glancing at the clock on your nightstand. 3:02. You wanted to scream in frustration.
Instead, you threw back your covers and opened your door, padding down the hall to the first floor. It was still an ungodly hour, darkness enshrouding the villa in menacing shadows. Still, it was peaceful; a nice contrast to the rambunctious cacophony that came with the day. You silently made your way into the kitchen, checking cabinets for the right size glass. You slipped three ice cubes in it and poured some water in, enjoying the little crackle that the ice made.
"Couldn't sleep?" Namjoon's voice was soft enough that he didn't startle you too badly.
Your eyes darted towards the sound. He was sitting on one of the couches of the lounge area, laptop perched on his thighs with its light turned low. Namjoon offered you a kind smile (of course flashing that adorable dimple of his) and scooted aside so that he wasn't taking up the whole couch. You wandered in to sit beside him, sipping quietly. He nodded in acknowledgment and returned his attention to his laptop, bracing his arm around the back of the couch behind you.
"New place, new sounds, same old insomnia," You muttered.
He quirked his mouth in sympathy.
"I know that all too well."
"Are you okay with me being here? Do you need space to work?"
"Nah, you're fine. I'm just drafting some lyrics, no big deal."
You glanced at his screen, but the text was in Korean. Not wanting to pry, you sighed and tilted your head back against the couch.
His presence was strangely comforting; here he was, an international superstar! Namjoon should have made you feel like fangirling into oblivion. (Perhaps you would still do so later.) But, somehow, all you felt was pleasant butterflies at his warmth beside you. Namjoon didn't make you incredibly nervous like you'd anticipated. He was introspective and soft around the edges, one of the original reasons you had begun to fall for him so long ago.
Indeed, it was very nice to sit in the near-darkness with him.
The two of you sat in comfortable silence for a while, just enjoying each other's company. You listened to the occasional soft clicking of his keyboard, lulled into a half-doze. You set your empty glass on the coffee table and sleepily snuggled up into his side, nestling your head against his shoulder. His arm came down around you, his fingers absently tracing shapes on your skin.
Your eyes snapped open after a few moments of bliss.
"Oh my god, I'm sorry. Is this okay? I should go." You moved to leave, but he pulled you back into his side, a soft chuckle rumbling in his chest.
"You're not bothering me at all. I actually find you soothing. You need the sleep, and you seem like you might not get it if you go back to your room. Stay a while with me."
Though still nervous you'd overstepped, you were able to settle back in against him. He was so beautiful, even in the low light of his computer. Maybe even especially so. His voice was even more transfixing in these low, quiet tones. Namjoon had definitely earned his spot as one of your biases.
"So, I've been meaning to ask you... What did you like most about my raps?"
You smiled softly in your sleepy state, snuggling your face further into his chest as you mulled it over with a low hum.
"You're so smooth. I like how you switch flows every so often, and you only repeat yourself if it's important. My favorite solo track was either seoul, tokyo, or moonchild. I loved it when you remixed Champion with Fall Out Boy. And I know it's a little older, but I loved Change with Wale. Your lyrics are always so heavy-hitting and honest, and combined with that voice of yours, I can't get enough. Been playing mono on repeat for a week now... and... mm..."
You trailed off into unintelligible little sounds that seemed like they should've been words. Realizing your mistake, you just grunted and moaned softly as you burrowed further into Namjoon's cocoon of heat. He would've laughed, if only that wouldn't have woken you up. You were fucking adorable.
Namjoon stroked your arm, grazing his knuckles over your skin delicately, and murmuring into your hair soft words you couldn't understand--his deep timbre helping you finally succumb to sleep.
Sunlight streamed in through the floor-to-ceiling windows, a sunbeam peeking through the curtains and falling precisely on your closed eyelids. The soft thud of a heartbeat beneath you didn't register at first, thinking it was your own in your ear. But as the sun warmed your face, consciousness returned to you slowly, and your shame began to become painfully obvious. You cracked your eyelids open, finding your face smooshed into the soft fabric of Namjoon's flannel sleep shirt. He smelled so pleasant and soft, like clean sheets that had been slept in by someone wearing expensive cologne.
His arms were wrapped around you comfortably, like he'd held you close in your sleep to keep you from falling. He had somehow moved almost completely beneath you, his long legs stretched out across the length of the couch and his head supported by a throw pillow. Your fingers were fisted in his shirt, legs tangled up in his. His laptop was resting on the floor, charging.
Though the whole scene was rather adorable and wholesome, you quickly became aware of how compromising a situation this was. It seemed as though it was *ahem* that time of morning. Namjoon's sleep pants were barely hiding a considerable problem, so considerable, in fact, you were surprised he was still sleeping so soundly.
His arms were heavy around you, but it just made you feel safe and secure. One of Namjoon's hands was resting over your own where it was gripping his shirt, his other comfortably draped around your waist. His chin gently rested on the top of your head.
There was no way for you to disentangle yourself from him without waking him up with your clumsiness.
Wincing and trying your very hardest not to be awkward, you gently wriggled out of Namjoon's grasp, aiming to roll towards the back of the couch. You planned to hop over the back of it and slip away. However, Namjoon would have none of this. His arm flexed around you and reeled you back in with a soft grunt, this time pulling your nose up into his neck for a beat. Your breath on his neck, however, caused his eyelids to fly open. You wriggled in panic, your thigh brushing his morning wood with an embarrassed squeak.
Seeming to recognize the situation, Namjoon gasped in surprise and sat up, releasing you like he'd been burned.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't want to wake you--!" Namjoon rushed to cover his very large problem with a throw blanket, "You were peaceful and warm, it was super late!"
He was so bashful, as though it was somehow his fault. You laughed nervously and tried to reassure him.
"No, no, it's my fault. You were just trying to help me sleep."
"I should've carried you back up to your room! I should've been a gentleman!"
"It's okay, Namjoon! I'm used to sleeping next to someone, is all. Please, calm yourself."
At first, he seemed to relax; until he realized you were used to sleeping next to someone.
"Um--Oh god, do you have a boyfriend? Is that why?" Now he felt a million times worse.
"No! God, no--I never would've come here if I did." You blushed, "Not like I expect anything from any of you! God, I need coffee--!"
You jumped up from the couch as though you'd been burned and raced into the kitchen to make some coffee. Namjoon could be seen out of your periphery slapping his forehead in irritation and embarrassment at his own silliness, a small smile spreading across your lips in spite of yourself. You proceeded to prepare a mug of coffee using the Keurig machine on the counter. Namjoon, apparently feeling that it was better to interact with you than wallow in his embarrassment, came to the kitchen island to watch you work.
Once it was brewed, you went to the fridge and poured in a large amount of flavored creamer. Once you stirred it, it was a very pale color, almost the color of sand. Namjoon scoffed at this, eyeing it skeptically.
"That's a lot of cream," He teased. "Don't you want to taste any coffee with your creamer?"
You laughed a little, tossing it in the microwave to heat it back up.
"Black coffee by itself is way too bitter for me. I like my coffee like I like my men: sweet."
You immediately regretted this comment, blushing like a beet and busying yourself with your mug to test the temperature. Instead of judging you, though, Namjoon offered a hearty chuckle before moving behind you to make his own mug.
At around 10:00 am, when you were just finishing the last of your very tall cup of coffee, Taehyung wandered into the kitchen looking sleepy and disheveled. His hair was fluffy and curly, sticking up in all directions in its silky dark waves. He blinked at you blearily, his voice gravelly with sleep.
"Normally, I don't like coffee, but I might need it today."
You laughed and indicated for him to sit down.
"Here, I'll make you one. What would you like?"
He paused, thinking about it, before yawning heavily.
"Something that'll wake me up."
Namjoon ruffled his friend's hair good-naturedly, his dimple flashing. You had to hide a squeak of appreciation behind your hand, turning it into a cough. You hoped nobody noticed.
As V nursed his mug, you sat down across from Namjoon, resting your cheek on your palm as you leaned on the counter. The sunlight was quickly warming the living area in the tropical morning, and there was the soft sound of birdsong that could be heard faintly through the glass.
Slowly, ever so slowly, more of BTS trickled in, one by one. Jin came in showered and dressed and raring to go; Jungkook was in sweatpants and a loose tee; Jimin, a sexy button-down with comfortable black slacks and no shoes. J-Hope bounced in just as Jin started making breakfast, his eyes glittering with the promise of food.
Suga was the last to rise, his eyes squinty and his demeanor dark. You had to hide a giggle as he plopped down next to you, grumbling something to Hoseok that made him laugh.
"What a beautiful day! I think we should go swimming, take advantage of this gorgeous weather, yeah?" Jin beamed, his smile as radiant as the sun outside at the sound of several affirmative noises. "Alright, youngest first, today..."
He quickly served up some omelettes, seeming to know all of his friends' preferences. Finally, he glanced at you, his discerning eye sizing you up.
"No, wait, don't tell me! Let me guess..." He stroked his chin, thinking hard as you two stared each other down.
He grinned and set to making your omelette without a word, using his best judgement. The plate that was put in front of you smelled heavenly, and as you took a bite, you groaned in ecstasy. Jin looked very pleased with himself.
"As always, our Hyung is a perfect 10!" Jimin encouraged.
Jin smirked, puffed up a little at the compliment. You snarfed down your omelette in less than a few minutes, earning an appreciative nod from both Jimin and V. Jimin's cheeks were rather full as he ate, reminding you of memes and videos you'd seen of him in the past; you fought the urge to giggle once more. He was just as adorable in real life, if not ten times more.
As the boys finished up one by one, drifting off to get ready for a day at the beach, you hung back. While you wanted to spend all of the time in the world with them, you were pretty insecure about yourself--especially since your most recent ex had made you question every ounce of self-esteem you'd once possessed. Now, logically, you'd known he was a dick, but it was pretty hard to get his harsh words out of your head. It made you pretty mad at yourself, but it was hard to shut out the anxiety bouncing around in your head.
"What's wrong? Do you not like the beach?" Suga was the last one sticking around, too. His eyes were only just now starting to perk up a little, even after two mugs of coffee with breakfast.
You winced, letting out a slow exhale as you wondered how much to divulge. His expectant, patient silence had your skin prickling with guilt.
"I... don't really like wearing swimsuits, no. I love the ocean and being on the boardwalk at the Oregon coast, but--I don't like my body. It's easier when I'm wearing clothing, I can hide a lot with the right outfit. Swimsuits don't really leave room for that, though."
Suga tilted his head at you, his expression doubtful.
"Bullshit." At your startled expression, he tsked and continued: "From what we've seen, you're gorgeous. My guess is you've got someone who called you names once and you've questioned it ever since."
For a moment, you just stared.
Suga stared right back. He was dead serious.
And, for the first time in a while, you felt seen.
Not in the obligatory sense, but--understood. You sighed and nodded hesitantly, to which he scoffed and turned to face you more fully. He gave you a once-over, eyes appraising and calm even as you squirmed under his gaze. With another disbelieving tsk, he turned to Jungkook, who was jogging down the stairs in nothing but a pair of small swim-trunks.
"Oy, Kookie, I need your opinion real quick."
Jungkook paused, tossing his towel over his shoulder, and approached the island with wide, curious eyes. Waiting.
"I want you to take a good, long look at Chickie here," Suga enunciated, "and I want you to tell her, with a straight face, what you think of her appearance. No lying, or I'mma get Namjoon-hyung to break that Switch of yours."
You blushed straight to the roots of your hair, glancing away to avoid his eyes. He looked almost as embarrassed as you were. But, still, you heard soft padding footsteps as Jungkook moved around the island to look. You felt fingers under your chin as he lifted your face, forcing you to meet his deep doe eyes.
Jungkook closely looked at you, going over every line and plane of your features, an attentive, observant expression on his face. After a few uncomfortable moments where you'd forgotten how to breathe, Jungkook spoke as he dropped your chin.
"I think she's beautiful."
"Don't tell me, idiot, tell her. She's the one who needs to hear it." Suga rolled his eyes, making you blush even harder, if that was possible.
Jungkook took a deep breath, and forced you to look at him again. Though he looked embarrassed, his voice was sincere.
"Y/N, you're beautiful. Don't let anyone tell you differently." He offered you a small reassuring smile before leaving the kitchen.
You barely held back the tears as Jungkook went to grab some flip-flops and wait on the patio for the others. Suga sighed and pulled you into him for a hug, patting your hair as you cried softly.
"Who did this to you, little bird?"
His words felt rhetorical, as though you weren't supposed to hear them. It had been so long since anyone had called you beautiful--and even longer since you'd believed them. You'd never in a million years would have thought that the golden maknae of all people would be the first to try to help you believe...
Some more footsteps announced the arrival of Jimin and V, both of whom looked rather alarmed at seeing you like this. Suga sighed and nodded them over, carefully letting you pull back. You dashed away your tears with the back of your hand in embarrassment, eyes finding your feet again.
"What--?" Jimin's eyes searched you for any injuries, worry creasing his face.
"Some dick told her lies," Suga supplied, "Like making her think that she's unattractive or some bullshit like that."
V's heart looked like it melted right then and there, his face scrunching up in empathy and hurt for you. With a soft coo, he pulled you into a hug, rocking you back and forth and running his hands over your back in an effort to console you.
"Hush now, you're beautiful. You're smart. You're incredible," Taehyung murmured.
Jimin agreed, squishing you between himself and Taehyung in a human sandwich. Jimin rested his cheek on the back of your head, gently rubbing your arms in an effort to calm you. You let out a soft sob, heart aching with the outpouring of love from these beautiful humans.
"I will personally deck anyone who calls you anything less than perfect," Jimin purred into your hair.
That caused you to snort, pulling back enough to momentarily lament ruining Taehyung's soft white tee.
"Please. You've known me one night--that's hardly enough to go on." Still, you wiped your eyes and offered them a grateful smile.
"C'mon, go upstairs and get that cute butt into a bathing suit. We're going swimming in a warm sea!" Taehyung gave your behind a gentle pat, pushing you in the direction of your room.
Suga watched all of this go down with mild interest before rolling his eyes at his younger friends.
"You two are hopeless flirts, you know that? Have you no shame?" His voice was quieter up here, but you could still see his irritated expression in your mind. You smiled in spite of yourself.
"There's nothing wrong with complimenting a lady when she needs it!" V protested.
"Obviously, she needs to remember her own worth. We can help guide her in the right direction, but ultimately she needs to decide it for herself..." Jimin's higher voice carried clearly through the house, fading once you shut your door behind you.
They were all so kind to you, so unerringly supportive and sweet.
Though you didn't want to let them down, you still fussed over which bathing suit to wear. You'd brought two separate suit sets, with the potential to mix and match with different items for different activities. For now, you decided on a plain black bikini top and some colorful striped swim shorts that ended halfway up your thighs. You pulled your hair up and out of your face, and only bothered with putting on some eyebrow pencil to help define your features a little. Opting for just some chapstick on your lips and nothing on your eyes, you came back downstairs with a large blue beach towel wrapped around you against the cold air conditioning.
Jimin and V were still in the kitchen, with Jimin now sporting blue trunks with a black dragon snaking up the right leg. V had shucked his shirt and was now just wearing his shorts, a soft grey material with a red drawstring at the waist. At least his hair was more tamed now, you thought with a smile. Your face flushed at the two very well-developed male chests, as well as the fact that you were quite exposed yourself. You felt your stomach tighten automatically, arms going to cover your chest self-consciously.
Jimin beamed at you as you descended, holding out a hand for you to take. V did the same, taking your other hand, his adorable boxy smile making all of the clouds in your head go away. You were now unable to hide from their appreciative gazes, the thought making your cheeks even hotter.
"Let's shed this towel, ah? There's no need to hide from us," Jimin cooed.
V slid open the glass door, leading the rest of you outside by his gentle tug.
On the patio sat Namjoon, Jin, and Suga, while J-Hope was already a small shape on the beach, chasing after Jungkook. You felt heat on your face as the three men saw you, eyes widening in appreciation.
Namjoon's hair had been swept back and he had a towel draped around his neck, his washboard chest and relaxed tummy sliding down into an attractive v shape that led to the hem of his dusty pink shorts. Jin had opted for simplicity, with navy blue shorts and brown sandals. Suga was in a white t-shirt and black shorts, his dark hair reflecting the sunlight with prismatic blue hues.
Suga offered you a slow smile and tilted his head towards the beach in a silent question.
"Come on! Hoseok and Kookie already beat us there!" Jin bounced off towards the surf with unrivaled enthusiasm.
Though Jimin and Tae seemed excited and ready, too, they hung back, staying with you and following your much slower pace. Suga took up position at the back of your little group, chatting softly with Namjoon as the five of you made your way for the beach.
"Did you sleep well, hyung?" Jimin's mischievous glance back at Namjoon made him stammer.
"I-ah--well enough, I suppose. I stayed up too late writing lyrics, you know--the usual."
Jimin and Taehyung giggled together at some shared secret, Tae's hand releasing yours to drift to rest at the small of your back.
"Are you sure about that, hyung?"
"Yes, why wouldn't I be?"
"Oh, nothing... it's just that Y/N's hair smells like your cologne."
Suga snorted at Namjoon's scandalized expression, though you weren't much better. You were blushing all the way to the roots of your hair.
"Tae, I swear nothing happened! I couldn't sleep, so I came downstairs for some water and Namjoon was on the couch with his laptop--!" You groaned in embarrassment and frustration as they laughed at your state. "We just chatted a little and I fell asleep on the couch!"
Namjoon seethed, frustrated at them for thinking he would ever be uncouth.
"You of all people should know it's never polite to wake a sleeping lady, Jimin--especially when she's sleeping on you."
Jimin quickly shut his mouth, but he couldn't hide his smirk.
"I'm not judging you, Joonie. Though, I hope for her sake that you woke up before her."
Namjoon huffed in embarrassment, earning a soft snort from you. You felt emboldened as the caffeine finally kicked in, full-force.
"I'm glad I didn't, Jimin--how else would I have found out the one thing every fangirl ever wishes to know about her bias?" You turned and took a pointed look at Namjoon's shorts before winking and grinning like the cat that got the cream.
Jimin blanched and coughed.
"Sorry I asked."
"Hey, it's not Joonie's fault that he's been blessed by the gods." You cackled at their startled expressions, finally starting to relax a little now that the conversation wasn't on you anymore.
Now thoroughly embarrassed and completely uncomfortable with the impressed glances he was getting from his younger brothers, Namjoon coughed and dodged around the three of you and jogged ahead to the sea. Suga wolf whistled after him, earning collective giggles from all of you.
"I wasn't gonna embarrass him any more to his face, but I can definitely confirm Y/N's report. Joon is packing some serious heat in those shorts." At your curious glances, Suga snickered and leaned in between your face and Taehyung's. "Jin said he could barely take half of his length."
You gasped loudly, jaw practically hitting the floor.
"Wait, Jin and Namjoon--?"
"Eh, ancient history, but they definitely used to."
Jimin and Tae seemed a little shocked, but after a moment of thought, Tae nodded in respect.
"Damn indeed, Tae. Damn indeed." Suga winked mischievously and squeezed Tae's and your shoulders before pulling back to hang behind you.
"While we're on the subject, what kinda relationships are y'all in right now?" You carefully ventured.
Jimin grinned and glanced back at Suga.
"Suga and J-Hope have definitely spending more time together than with the rest of us, that's for sure."
Suga glared at Jimin, but his voice held no venom when he responded.
"We're keeping that just between us. Do I dabble with him a little? Maybe. But if any of you breathe a word of this to him or anyone else, I will murder all of you."
It was less a threat, and more of a promise. You shuddered at the deadness in his expression.
"Cross my heart and hope to die," You muttered. "Scout's honor."
He nodded, satisfied, before falling silent once more.
"I want to clarify," Jimin began, "though there are a lot of fan theories and rumors about all of us being in one big gay gangbang or whatnot, most of those are just that--rumors. Everyone says Kook and I or Tae and I are together, but we're just best friends. I am totally unattached."
He shot you a wink before squeezing your hand in his. Tae nodded.
"I'm not into Jimin like that. I wouldn't mind doing a guy, but Jiminie and I are just too close for that. I know everything about this idiot, I don't think I have it in me to fuck him!"
Jimin feigned heartbreak, clutching at his chest dramatically.
"You mean, you don't think I'm beautiful, Taehyung-ah?" Jimin sounded so wounded, you couldn't help but giggle.
Tae threw back his head, playing along with the ruse as he hiked up his voice in a silly way.
"Of course I think you're gorgeous, babe. You're just too much of a serial flirt for me to be able to commit." He paused. "Though, if I had to choose, I wouldn't mind doing Kookie..."
"I think there isn't anyone who would mind doing Kookie, the boy is built like a mountain."
"I'd be jealous at that comment, but I can't disagree!" Jimin cackled. "Alright, we can gossip more later. We're on the beach! We need to have some fun!"
Jimin whooped and dropped his towel on the sand, raising both of his hands over his head as he sprinted towards the surf. Tae sighed and squeezed your hand before following suit.
Suga grumbled, coming up beside you to drape his arm across your shoulders.
"What a bunch of dorks."
You couldn't hide the smile that lit up your face as you watched the boys attack each other with splashes of water and sand.
"I dunno. I kinda like them." You bumped your hip into him playfully.
"Of course you do. It's impossible not to once you spend time with them." He gently rubbed your arm, glancing down at you. "So, whattaya say? Wanna show these losers how it's done?"
You met his gaze, your inner competitiveness making your eyes glitter evilly.