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Gone Wrong

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“Guys, you won’t believe what I found!” Kirishima walked up to the group with bottle of pink liquid, smirking.

 

“What’s that?” Todoroki asked.

 

“It’s a truth drink!” He shook it teasingly. “Anyone want to try?”

 

“What does it do?”

 

“Well, you drink it and you have to tell the truth! It doesn’t work well, so it only lasts for about a minute, but hey!” He put it down on the table. “I might have stolen it off of Toga when we fought.”

 

“Are you sure this is a good idea guys?” Midoriya asked nervously.

 

Bakugo sneered. “Got something to hide, nerd? If it’s how useless you are, everyone already knows that.”

 

Midoriya looked Bakugo dead in the eye. He picked up the bottle and poured the entire thing down his throat, never breaking eye contact.

 

Bakugo laughed. “Thought so-”

 

The green-haired boy shook, his head drooping before shooting back up. “I want to die.” his eyes were blank, empty, emotionless. “Every day I wish I were dead. I know I won’t make it much longer. I hate myself. Nobody else loves me. I’m useless.”

 

“Midoriya!”

 

“I wish I- STOP! - was- NO- de- IT’S A LIE- ad” Midoriya was dead-eyed one second, screaming in pain the next. It was a horrible sight, he looked as if he was glitching. “I hate myself- HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO- and want to- STOP THIS- kill myself.” He was tearing at his throat, his eyes, his mouth.

 

“Do you hurt yourself?” Todoroki asked nervously as Midoriya’s knees buckled.

 

“Yes- SHOTO- I do. Every ni- WHY- ght.” Midoriya was on the floor sobbing now, as he robotically pulled off his shirt, hundreds of scars, mostly fresh, crisscrossing his chest and torso. The scrawny boy clamped his hand over his mouth, muffled screaming filling the room.

 

Kirishima ran forward. “I’ll get Mr. Aziawa.” He ran out of the room as fast as he could.

 

Midoriya suddenly jumped up. “No!” He lunged after him, Todoroki grabbing onto the boy as he thrashed and struggled.

 

“Calm down, you’re ok.”

 

“How could you do this to me?” he grabbed his jacket and ran.

 

“Dammit Midoriya!” Bakugo jumped after him, but he was already gone.

 

 

 

Midoriya had nowhere to go, so he bolted back into his dorm. He curled up into a ball, using his jacket as a shield. When did he put it on? When did he take it off?

 

He tried to ground himself. He was under his desk, the air conditioning was on, his back ached a little from the ball he was rolled into. He started to breathe easier, calm down. Maybe he was ok.

 

Footsteps pounded above him, and he panicked again, shaking and sniffling, his muscles clenched rock-solid. Why him. Why did he have to be like this, why was the world like this. He gripped tightly onto his razorblade and drew it across his cramping stomach muscles. WHY? He laid limply on the floor, tears and blood streaming weakly from his stomach. As the footsteps got closer, he pulled himself and his jacket up, tossing dirty laundry over the stain. He put his head between his knees and rocked lightly from side to side.

 

Bakugo threw the door open, and Midoriya’s head shot up as he squeaked from fear.

 

“Izuku! You’re safe. You-”

 

Midoriya couldn’t explain it, but he was mad. Enraged. He didn’t even know what he was doing. He pulled up his jacket, revealing the bleeding ‘why?’. “Are you happy, Kacchan?”

 

Bakugo dropped to his knees, looking like he had just been shot. Tears welled up in his eyes. Midoriya stormed past him and left, making it halfway down the hallway before breaking into tears. He slumped against Todoroki’s door, pulling the hood over his head. His shoulders shook lightly, his face wet and sticky.  He was so tired. Maybe if he just…

 

“Midoriya!” Todoroki ran up just as he closed his eyes. He knelt in front of the boy, pulling up his hood to stare into his flushed, glistening face. He cupped his cheek in his hand. “You’re ok. Let’s go inside.” Midoriya tried to stand, but Todoroki simply scooped him up into his arms, laying him down on his bed. “I’ll go get my first aid kit.”

 

When Todoroki came back, Midoriya simply looked at him with wide eyes. Icyhot sat next to him on he bed. “Can you take off your jacket?” He shook his head, tears welling up in his eyes again. “I’m not going to hurt you, it’s ok.”

 

“Can you just do it for me?” He asked, wiping his nose.

 

“Of course.” Todoroki gently pulled the fabric off the boy’s sticky skin. As soon as he was exposed, Midoriya pulled his arms tightly around his scars. Todoroki grabbed onto his arms and moved them onto the bed. He murmured quiet comforts as he wiped off the blood and dirt from Izuku’s skin.

 

After he was all cleaned up, Todoroki put his arms around Deku’s shoulders. They sat there for a long time, Midoriya burying his face in his chest.

 

“I should probably tell Mr. Aizawa you’re ok. Last I checked he was in his office.”

 

“Oh, ok.”

 

They quietly walked to his office, Midoriya feeling sick to his stomach. He turned to Todoroki. “I’ll see you soon, can you wait for me at your dorm? There was something I wanted to ask.”

 

“Of course!” Todoroki squeezed his shoulder. “You’ll be ok.”

 

“Thanks.” Midoriya walked towards Mr. Aizawa’s room, feeling the sickness in his stomach get bigger and bigger. He poked his head into the office, took one look at the gaunt man in the chair, and started gagging. He fell backwards, retching. He stumbled into the bathroom, barely making it to the sink.

 

Todoroki hurried in, wrapping his arms around the green-haired boy. He finished throwing up, then buried his face in Icyhot’s welcoming embrace.

 

“I can’t do it.” He whimpered. “He’ll expel me, won’t he?”

 

“You’re not getting expelled. At least, I wasn’t.”

 

“That’s good. Wait, what?” Midoriya glanced at Todoroki’s oblivious face.

 

“I’ll tell you about it later.”

 

“No, you don’t have to-”

 

“It’s ok. Do you want me to sit in with you? It might make it easier.”

 

“You’ll think I’m stupid.” Mumbled Midoriya.

 

“Nobody thinks you’re stupid, Deku.”

 

“If you’re ok with it.”

 

“Is that alright, Mr. Aizawa?” Todoroki looked at the man in the doorway.

 

“What?” Midoriya fell against the sink. “When did you-”

 

“Fine by me.” Aizawa shrugged, leading the way back to his office.

 

They sat there for about an hour, as Midoriya explained everything that happened to him. All his misery and pain, bullying, his father beating him, how useless he felt, his teachers, his mom. He felt himself gripping onto Todoroki’s hand after a while, but Todoroki didn’t seem to be fazed.

 

 

After they started to leave, Aizawa walked up and gave Midoriya a hug. It almost crushed his bones, but he leaned into it. “I’m sorry.” He quietly said, squeezing his student a little tighter.

 

 

 

Todoroki and Midoriya sat on Todoroki’s bed again, Midoriya’s finger’s absentmindedly picking at his bandages. They sat in silence for a little while, Todoroki pulling his hand away from his wounds. Midoriya spoke in a small voice “Do you think he’ll tell everyone?”

 

“He won’t. I promise you that.” Shoto rolled up his sleeves to show a few rows of lines.  “Listen, I understand. I know what it feels like to have nowhere to turn but your pain. But please, come talk to me. I’m here for you.”

 

“What am I even sad for? You’ve been through so much and I…” He was cut off by Todoroki cupping his face in his hand. Midoriya could feel his face heating up.

 

“Don’t say that. Just because someone else had it worse doesn’t mean your experiences don’t matter. Your teacher for God’s sake… that is worse than anything I can imagine.”

 

Midoriya gripped the sheets tightly at the mention of his teacher. Tears welled up in his eyes and he started to breathe rapidly.

 

“Oh no, come here.” Shoto pulled the tiny boy into his chest, kissing him on the top of his head and rubbing his back. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”

 

“It’s ok, I shouldn’t have overreacted.” Midoriya mumbled.

 

“Don’t apologize. You didn’t overreact, that’s called trauma.” Todoroki smiled slightly down at him.

 

“Thanks.” Sniffed Midoriya, pulling at his bandages again.

 

“Try just holding onto my hands to distract your brain.” Shoto offered out his hands. Midoriya grabbed onto them, blushing profusely. Icyhot was as oblivious as usual.

 

“Uh, Todoroki, would you ever, uh… want to go out with me?” stammered out Midoriya.

 

“Of course.” Shoto smiled slightly. “do you want to just skip that and date now?”

 

Midoriya almost fell off the bed. “Yes. Yes. One-thousand percent yes.”

 

“Aww, thanks.” Shoto broke out into a rare blush

 

They fell asleep curled up on Todoroki’s bed, Todoroki staying awake for a while to watch over the tiny boy in his arms.

 

 

 

The next day, Bakugo knocked on the door. Todoroki and Midoriya were sitting on the floor trying to learn how to braid hair.

 

“I’ll get it!” Deku chirped, reaching for the door. Bakugo threw his arms around his the second he saw him.

 

“I’m so sorry.” Rough tears poured from the bigger boy’s eyes.

 

“Come sit down Kacchan.” He was led to the bed, still holding onto Midoriya like he would slip away.

 

“I sat there for hours, I thought about all the ways I hurt people, I was so angry, I

m a monster, I’m sorry.” Bakugo sniffled. “I’m going to change. I swear. I have to.”

 

“I’m glad, Kacchan.” Midoriya pet his hair soothingly. Bakugo grabbed onto him again, sobbing into his shoulder.

 

They sat there for a while, Bakugo apologizing and Deku assuring him that he could change, he knew he had it in him. Todoroki just sat there. Kirishima came in to comfort Bakugo as well.

 

 

 

Both slowly started to heal, Bakugo making amends, Midoriya learning to love himself again. Midoriya still masked his sadness, Bakugo was still angry, but they tried. That’s what really makes a hero, right?