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Scars on My Heart

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"It's just a stupid cut," InuYasha snapped as he tried to scramble backwards without wincing, "It'll get better in the morning. I don't need you to clean it."

"Oh yes. Whatever could go wrong," Kagome countered scathingly as she watched the black haired boy literally back himself into a corner, "Why bother cleaning a dirt covered wound? It'll just seal up all that dirt in the morning and you'll get blood poisoning. No big deal."

Inuyasha smirked despite himself before his glare returned full force.

"You just want to see me naked," he tried hoping her embarrassment would get her to leave him alone.

"Oh. You got me. That was my plan all along," Kagome bit back sarcastically before giving him a withering glare, "Shirt. Off."

"Make me," he snarled and Kagome sighed.

"You're so immature."

"You're immature."

"Great comeback," Kagome snorted, "Doesn't sound like something a child would say at all."

"I'm not a child!"

"Then stop acting like one," Kagome clipped back as she raised an eyebrow, "You want to keep going? We've got all night and I'm not backing down until you let me see your wound."

The stare down that followed would've sent chills down even Naraku's spine before InuYasha admitted defeat and began shrugging out of his clothes.

"Not like dirt even got on it," he muttered scathingly, "Stupid woman. Being all dramatic."

Kagome ignored the insult as she collected the linens and disinfectant she had laid out. Scooting towards the seething man sending daggers at her with his dark eyes, she gently wiped away the smeared blood before her hand paused. Wiping again, she realized that some of the dark pink streaks weren't blood smears at all.

"What are these?" Kagome whispered as she traced a few with her finger and Inuyasha's angry countenance faded as he looked down.

"Nothing," he replied indifferently, "Hurry up already. That shit burns my nose."

"They're scars," she whispered as her eyes traveled across his chest. It was littered with them. How had she never noticed before?

"Are you blind? They've been there woman," he hissed as insecurity welled in his chest, "Like I said. They're nothing."

"I've never seen them," she replied softly as her gaze drifted upwards to his neck. Several purplish jagged lines adorned his throat. Like multiple someones had tried to slice it at one point or another. A shaky sigh escaped her lips.

"When did these happen?" she asked quietly as she traced a particular nasty one on his throat with her finger causing him to shiver. Not because it felt good either. He'd always assumed she'd been able to see them. A cold feeling of dread settled uneasily in his gut.

"Years ago," he admitted nervously as his eyes searched her face. She looked so sad. He swallowed thickly and unfortunately the movement accentuated the pale purplish lines causing Kagome's eyes to widen incrementally.

There were so many of them. Not one or two or even three. Dozens of people had tried to slit his throat. Dozens.

Forcing his chin up so she could inspect them more thoroughly, she really should've seen what followed coming. Hell hath no fury like an insecure half-demon.

"Get the fuck off" he snapped as he roughly pushed her away before instantly regretting what he'd done when Kagome fell onto her back. Her head making a soft thump as it made contact.

"Wait. Shit. Are you okay? I didn't mean..." he hissed as he scrambled forward and gently helped her back up, "Sorry. I just..."

"It's fine, InuYasha," she sighed as she rubbed the back of her head. He looked more miserable and horrified than she'd ever seen before.

"I hurt you," he whispered as his human eyes seemed to scan her body for injuries before, finding nothing worrisome, he finally relaxed. Kinda.

"I tried to pop the personal space bubble," Kagome laughed softly, "Should've known better."

"The what?" he blurted before the rest of what she'd said registered.

"You think I'd hurt you," he accused as his heart broke and she shook her head.

"I'm not saying that," she comforted as she gave him a reassuring smile, "Just saying I shouldn't have tried to do that."

Whatever she was doing was having the opposite effect of what she wanted. InuYasha suddenly looked so incredibly lost and scared and unsure of himself. Obviously unnerved by what he'd done and upset about what she'd said. If it wasn't so sad, she might've laughed at the uncharacteristic behavior. It was weird. Just...weird.

"Do you want to look at them?" he finally asked as he cast her a quick glance. He could fix this, he thought. He needed to fix this. He'd hurt her. Oh god he'd actually hurt her.

"The scars you mean?" she clarified and he nodded. His mind still replaying the last excruciating minute over and over and over. His self loathing building until he very seriously almost puked. Stupid human emotions. Making him do shit and feel.

"Do you want me to?" She asked hesistantly and he shrugged in reply. Truth be told, no. No he didn't. He didn't like being stared at on a good day. Especially when those stares focused on part of himself that were different.

All this time he'd assumed she saw them. Even on occasion when he felt like punishing himself, he almost thought she found him attractive despite his married skin, and demon traits. The demonic traits she obviously wasn't bothered by but the scars she clearly had never noticed before did. They seemed to bother her a lot.

Was she disgusted by him now? He had just gotten used to her genuine acceptance too. Assuming that she really didn't care about his appearance but now he knew the truth. It was entirely possible her vision was so bad she just didn't know.

Maybe she couldn't see what he looked like at all. That would explain a lot actually.

Either way he needed to fix all of this. He needed to fix it now.

Swallowing thickly, he nodded as he moved back into the corner and waited for the doom that was inevitably coming.

"Why don't I see these when you're normal?" Kagome asked as she scooted forward and began looking at the scars of his chest more closely. The small line over his heart that had clearly been placed there by Kikyo's arrow. The deep purple puckered one where Sesshomaru had thrust his hand through his stomach. But there was a series of healed gashes wrapping around his side that had her particularly concerned.

"I dunno," he muttered awkwardly. Being examined so throughly made him uneasy. She seemed so intrigued by those marks on his skin and not in a good way. Had she really never noticed before? What else had she not seen?

"I normally have dog ears, ya know," he muttered in an unsure tone that had her looking up at him instantly in amusement.

"No duh," she giggled, "What do they have to do with these scars?"

Well that was one less thing bothering him. She wasn't blind as a...

Wait, what the hell? What did she mean what did his ears have to do with...

"Are you really that stupid? I only have these because of those ears. Because of what I am," he snapped angrily as he glared down at her.

"I didn't mean..." Kagome groaned as she sat back on her knees and gave him a patient glare, "I was just wondering why you said that."

"Because you're acting like this," he gestured to his exposed torso, "Is new. Like it hasn't always been there."

"I've seen you literally naked before and you don't have these when you're your usual self," Kagome pointed out with an amused smile that fell when he merely looked confused, "At least to human eyes, I guess. Can you see them all the time?"

He let out a shuddering breath as he tried to get his anger back under control. Why were emotions so much harder as a human?

"They're lighter normally. More silver," he admitted finally as he awkwardly shifted his weight. He'd always assumed...

Maybe the others couldn't see them either. The scars invisible to human eyes. Shippo noticed. InuYasha knew he had. There were times the stupid brat seemed a little too focused on the worst of these blemishes when he thought no one was watching.

"Maybe that's it then," she hummed as she glanced over her chest before her eyes drifted back to those deep grooves wrapping across his stomach from the back.

"What's this one?" she asked quietly as she reached out and ran her finger across one of the shockingly deep valleys. He cringed and sat up a little straighter so his back was nearly flush against the wall. The scars on his chest, though numerous and ugly themselves, were the least of his problems. His chest wasn't a veritable topographical map complete with enough sprawling grooves that someone might mistake it for tree bark. At least the part she was looking at now had some smooth areas.

"It's a scar stupid," he clipped back hoping that the insult would end this line of questioning before swearing silently when her hand suddenly slipped behind him and her eyes widened in horror.

"Let me see your back," she breathed and he shook his head.

"I'm still bleeding," he pointed out as he desperately tried to change the subject, "You need to finish what you started. What about blood poisioning?"

"The bandage will have to wrap around your middle which will require me seeing your back," she pointed out with a knowing look.

"It's not that bad," he argued weakly, "Just put one of those bandaids on it."

"InuYasha," Kagome warned, "Don't me say it."

"You wouldn't dare," he sneered although she could hear the genuine fear in his tone. She didn't sit him when he was human for a very good reason. The miko had done so once before when he was human and the spell had straight up broken his nose. Blood had gushed out all night after Sango had set it and the resulting bruise took two full days to disappear. To call the incident unpleasant would be an understatement.

"Then lay down and let me see your back," she challenged and the glare off began. Growing in intensity as they shot daggers and screamed at each other through expression alone. The problem he had was that he knew she would never let this go if he didn't fold. Might even be afraid to touch that part of him if she thought it might aggravate injuries long since healed. Kagome riding his back was definitely not something he had any intention of giving up. Which caused a conflict of It's own. If she saw, she might not want to touch him at all. Might be disgusted by the memory of seeing the mottled, disturbing sight.

"I just want to see," she finally asked in a soft, pleading tone as she batted her eyelashes at him and pouted prettily. His resolve wavered at the dirty trick.

"You're still you Inuyasha. I feel bad that I've never noticed before," she tried again in the sweetest, least cheesy tone she could manage and he folded.

Damn her.

Sighing, he slowly sprawled out on the floor, wincing when his still unattended injury hit the gritty floor. So much for worrying about the previously not covered in dirt wound.

Kagome's soft gasp felt like a thousand daggers in his heart. He turned his face away from her and rested his cheek on his arms. She'd never look at him the same again and a part of him grieved the inevitable loss.

"What happened?" she asked as her fingers trailed down the heavily grooved flesh. How could she have missed this? His back normally felt so smooth and this was far from the first time she'd tended to an injury.

"What do you think happened?" he chuckled darkly, "I got hurt."

Clearly, Kagome thought miserably as her eyes followed a strange series of wide loops. They had obviously been stretched over time. As he had grown, the skin had been pulled to match his larger stature.

"These are from when you were small," she whispered as she traced the asymmetrical grooves that were much, much deeper than they looked and were to blame for the wrap around blemish as well.

"Yeah," he sighed heavily. He knew which ones she was referring too. Those had been the first ugly marks he'd received.

"Are they from a whip?" she asked cautiously and he nodded.

"Why?" she asked quietly before huffing in frustration and backpedaling, "I mean I know why, why but I just..."

"My grandfather tied me to a post after mother died," he explained softly, "Something about the plague. I can't really remember."

She let out a shuddering breath and her fingers stilled for a moment.

"Is that how your mother died? She got sick?" Kagome asked as her fingers began lazily tracing the elaborate purplish groove once more and he nodded. Truth be told, it felt nice to have her touch him so intimately. When she usually tended to his injuries touch was just a means to an end. Deliberate and purposeful. This was...

He shivered slightly at the sensation.

"Sorry," she cringed as she retracted her hand, "Did that hurt?"

"No. Just cold is all," he lied softly, "You can keep looking if you want."

"There's so many," she murmured sadly as her fingers splayed out against his back and he had to bite his lip to keep from moaning. This wasn't bad. This wasn't bad at all. Why had he fought her again?

"What's this one?" she asked as one finger pressed lightly into a crescent shaped groove above his shoulder blade. He shrugged and the movement caused the marred flesh to crumple around her fingertip.

"I get injured a lot Kagome. You can't expect me to remember each time," he sighed.

"I..." the miko began as she lifted her hand and leaned over to look at his face, "I've been working on using my power to heal injuries. Since you're human right now, would you mind if I practiced? Maybe I can fade some of them. If you want."

The prospect of Kagome basically giving him a massage was very, very tempting. Whatever she wanted to try obviously wasn't going to work but who was he to say no to a pretty girl wanting to run her hands all over him?

He nodded before a satisfied hum escaped him when her palms suddenly pressed against the base of his back, applying slightly more pressure as they began sliding upwards before running down his sides. Again and again and again until he was panting slightly.

His mind lazily drifted into a less than innocent direction as he allowed himself to pretend that she still somehow found him attractive and her hands were running over him for an entirely different reason. It was especially easy to fantasize when her fingers trailed over his hip bone. A little too easy.

This needed to stop before he did something else to fuck up the best thing that had ever happen to him.

"I think that's enough," he sighed as he pushed himself back up into a sitting position.

"I got rid of a few," she offered with a proud little smile that had his heart melting.

"Did you?" he laughed before his face fell and his insecurity peeked out its head in his mind. He needed to get ahold of himself before he got his hopes up.

"I still can't do deeper scars but..." she admitted before trailing off when she noticed how he was withdrawing into himself.

"Hey, what's wrong?" she asked before mentally smacking herself upside the head. She was just winning the asking stupid questions game tonight, wasn't she?

"I have a scar too," she offered and he glanced at her in confusion, "Do you want to see?"

Before he could respond, she was pulling her shirt up and his eyes nearly bugged out of his head as smooth creamy flesh he'd never gotten a good look at before was exposed for his viewing pleasure. Not only was he allowed to look, he was expected to look and his little, very male heart could barely handle it.

"See? Where the jewel popped out," she commented oblivious to his inner struggle. It wasn't nearly as bad as she thought it was but it was still rather deep. The hot pink puckered blemish the only thing even remotely flawed about her stomach. His hand moved before he could stop himself. His calloused palm resting on her waist as his thumb gently caressed the mark. Trailing up and down over the scar while the sensation of his hand on her skin overwhelmed his system.

His eyes trailed over the light tan curves of her stomach. His mind trying to commit the sight to memory. Counting every freckle and taking note of every minute detail.

"Still beautiful," he whispered more to himself than her before he inhaled sharply and retracted his hand like it burned. He hadn't meant to say that out loud dammit. He hadn't...

" think I'm beautiful?" Kagome asked softly and his heart plummeted to the bottom of his stomach as he waited for the axe to fall. Her hands lowering her shirt slowly as her sapphire eyes tried to read his mortified expression.

Smiling softly, she scooter closer to him and he flinched.

"You think I'm pretty," she teased and his humiliation only grew as he glared at the floor to his side. That was a stupid thing to say. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. St...

He gasped softly when her lips suddenly were pressed against his own. Each meeting slow and lingering and coaxing him to respond and with a soft groan he did.

Panting heavily several long heated moments later, he stared at her in utter confusion.

"Why'd you do that?" he managed to breathe.

"Because I think you're pretty too."

InuYasha snorted before pulling her in so he could kiss her again.