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Great Demon Overlord Fuckface

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MC could feel Lucifer’s glare from his seat in the student council meeting room as they held eye contact with Lord Diavolo. The rest of the brothers shifted uncomfortably in their seats, not knowing what to say as they’ve already given the human all the signals to stop moments ago. Mammon openly gawked at them in sheer horror while Leviathan, Asmodeus, and Beelzebub shivered in their seats in fear of what was about to come for their exchange student. A flash of mirth washed over Satan when he stole a glance at his eldest brother’s provoked state but his left hand gripped at his chest and his well-practiced polite smile trembled as even he could not completely hide the anxiety from the tension in the room. Belphegor, alert and wide awake, sat up stiffly in his seat, debating on slipping into his demon form too to protect them in any way he can in case everything goes to hell.

They stood their ground, ignoring Lucifer’s burning gaze and continued to look at the Demon Prince who also did not break eye contact with them even when he took a sip of the tea Barbatos just poured.

“Would you please elaborate?” Lord Diavolo finally asked after a few tense seconds that kept the demon brothers on the edge of their seats.

“Of course, Great Demon Overlord Fuckface!”

Lucifer almost snapped right then and there. 

You see, the explanation to this whole incident is quite simple.

It was MC’s second year at RAD thanks to a certain sorcerer who dragged them down to hell- pardon me, to the Devildom. This time around, Lord Diavolo requested that they take part in being an active honorary member of the student council along with Solomon and Simeon. They mostly spent time with Diavolo when it came to this business, answering his questions to the best of their abilities with human school events and how they could be celebrated as well in RAD. It served as a way for them to become better friends with the prince who insisted that they adopt a first-name basis whenever nobody except for Barbatos was around after becoming close months into the school year.

“Hey, Diavolo,” the prince hummed in response, not lifting his head from the surveys answered by RAD students on which celebratory event from Human World schools they would like to celebrate in the coming month. “How does a demon compliment another demon here in the Devildom?”

“What do you mean exactly?” he asked.

“You see, there’s this type of cliché in human world media where characters that are on the more wicked side of the spectrum compliment each other differently,” they explained. “Instead of the usual compliments like: “You look nice today.” or “Your dress looks good on you.”, they’ll say things like, “You look absolutely dreadful this horrible morning.” or maybe “Your outfit is straight up awful.”.”

“Why?” Diavolo questioned in pure confusion, finally looking up from the papers to give them a quizzical look.

“Because they’re “evil”, and “wicked”, and “dark”,” they answered, putting emphasis on each word with the flexing of their pointer and middle fingers to depict quotation marks in the air. “But it can be kinda funny at times, I think.”

“Well then,” the demon leaned back into his seat and looked at MC with a childlike grin. “What if we play a little game?”

And so began the competition of who could give the best bad compliment between them. The first rule was that there would be no low blows and if the other started feeling uncomfortable or hurt the round would end. The first to laugh, giggle, or chuckle would lose. At the start, both of them were quite nervous, staying polite with their words and the game would end with just giggles from one of them. As time passed by, however, both MC and Diavolo got bolder with their profanities and insults were nothing more than comedic material.

So there MC was, sitting in one of the seats in the student council room with Solomon next to them and the brothers in their usual chaotic states in their respective throne-like chairs. Lucifer wanted to get to the meeting room early and invited MC, who then invited Levi and Beel to come along since MC stumbled upon them on their way out to meet with Lucifer on the front gates of the HoL which caused Asmo to want to join when he passed by and heard their conversation who then dragged Satan along and Belphie decided to go if his twin was already while Mammon didn’t want to be the only one left behind while going off about how he was MC’s first [demon they made a pact with] so of course he had no choice but to come with them.

Simeon noticed the whole House of Lamentation household on their way to the Student Council room when they bumped into him in the hallway and told them he’d just make a quick stop to attend to something before getting to the meeting room.

Solomon, well, he just popped in.

 

Diavolo
Why did everyone decide to come in early?
It’s quite embarrassing for the president to be the one who comes last. 

MC
Don't worry about it.
Everyone is aware that we're all here earlier than expected.
No one's gonna think you're late.

Do you want to play a round when I arrive?

In front of all the brothers?
In front of Lucifer of all demons?
Sounds like a recipe for disaster.
I’m game.

Barbatos and I are on our way.
Let’s do an Archery round.

 

MC gaped at the request. An Archery round was a category in their little made-up game where instead of having an exchange of bad compliments, only one person would be receiving the “compliments” and the other had to keep their cool and they lose the round if they laugh like the general rules of the original game. They did this alternatively and in the last round, Diavolo was the archer.

 

MC
You know that it’s your turn to be the target this round, right?
With Lucifer in the room…
Don’t let me die.
Please.
Read

 

As if on cue, the doors to the Student Council room moved to make way for the Prince of the Devildom and his butler to enter. Everyone stood up to acknowledge his presence and greeted him in unison to pay respect to his status.

"Good morning, Lord Diavolo," the room echoed and he returned the salutation with a greeting of his own. He caught MC's gaze and the two nodded in agreement to start the game.

"You look like you have something to say, MC?" he grinned. Bright eyes twinkling with a mischief only the other understood as their little fun was about to begin.

"You look exceptionally horrendous today, my Lord. Did you do something with your face?" they asked, taking note of the rigid expressions that overtook the once relaxed occupants of the room. Lucifer and Simeon in particular had wider eyes than anyone else in the room.

"Thank you for noticing!" Diavolo beamed, not losing an ounce of optimism in his voice despite the subtle yet obvious anxious mood that was slowly creeping into the room from their comment. "Barbatos recently acquired a new skin care product from the country of South Korea in the human world for me. It must be working well enough for you to have noticed." Barbatos himself still kept his small smile unmoved, used to the unpleasant humorous exchanges between the two and even joining a few times which he would always end up winning. Barbatos never had to resort to vulgar terms as there was just something about him employing a passive-aggressive tone with insults that sounded like they were last used by Shakespeare that made him so funny without much effort.

"Well," Diavolo took his place on the table. "Shall we start?"

The whole meeting was even more tense than they usually were. With all participants seated around a large circular table, MC sat between Solomon and Simeon who would nudge them in alarm every time they opened their mouth to send a direct remark towards Diavolo. Solomon just watched them in interest, having an idea on what was going on when Diavolo seemed to be taking their words that increased in offense yet managed to remain subdued with the lack of real venom with every comment in stride. Having grown up knowing about that particular cliché in human media as well, he would say their comments were what one could expect from a supernatural flick.

The brothers, however, were not as calm. Belphegor and Satan looked the most composed but their eyes that would shift too often at the human betrayed their calm facade and Belphie looked wide awake as opposed to his usually drowsy state. Beelzebub's stomach rumbled and grumbled as usual but the volume increased while their time intervals decreased as a result of the worry he had. Asmodeus' smile was strained, shooting glances filled with caution at his darling little human and Leviathan couldn't even look at them in the eye as the poor demon looked like he was trying to make himself look smaller in his seat. The most effort he made at communicating with the human to stop with whatever suicide mission they were hoping to complete was having his brothers secretly pass little notes along with Mammon’s own short letters filled with nervous advice to stop with the passive-aggressive remarks. Aside from the letters, Mammon would mouth at them ever so often things like: “Are ya stupid?”, “Stop it.”, and “You’ll die.” while secretly pointing at his older brother who was seated right next to him. 

Lucifer, oh dear Luci was pissed as fuck . If looks could kill, MC would have already been nothing but a cold corpse by their third try. He had already attempted to lash out and reprimand them several times in the past hour but would always get interrupted by Diavolo himself who would always speak up before the Avatar of Pride could even utter a word of hostility against the human. 

There was a tinge of disappointment in the prince as he was expecting more from MC but he supposes he can’t really blame them for holding back and resorting to the low-key “compliments” that resembled those from their early rounds when the demon who has sworn complete loyalty to him was silently simmering in outrage next to him.

Little did he know, the punch among the pokes was just about to come.

“What do you think, MC?” The prince asked after pitching out one of his ideas for the upcoming Sports Fest they planned. He kept his refined smile from slipping into an expectant grin when the human deviously smirked back.

“That’s a godawful idea, Great Demon Lord Fuckface!”

Diavolo’s smile slipped from his face and the twinkle of amusement faded from his eyes. The entire room fell into deathly silence that every nervous gulp, every hitch in breath, every heartbeat that thumped wildly against the chests of the people in the room seemed to thunder against the human’s ears.

“MC,” Lucifer growled out in warning. From the corner of their eye, they could see the two sets of pitch black wings twitching behind him and the curve of his horns protruding from his head, the tell-tale signs that he was mad beyond reason which caused him to shift into his demon form. “You dare refer to the Demon Prince with such obscenity? You? A lowly human who-”

“Barbatos,” Diavolo called out to his butler who has been obediently and quietly jotting down notes this whole time, effectively cutting Lucifer off from the start of his prideful admonition with a calm yet commanding tone fit for the heir of the Demon King. “Tea, please.”

“Would you please elaborate?” The absence of the cheer in his eyes that was there ever since the moment he entered the room would have made them stop in their tracks in fear they had gone too far but MC knew Diavolo. The joyless eyes and clenched jaw weren’t omens of death to them. It didn’t mean that they were moments away from facing the consequences of offending the Demon Prince. 

It simply meant that Diavolo was overcome with hilarity and steeling himself was his last resort to not losing the game.

“Of course, Great Demon Overlord Fuckface.”

Lucifer stood from his seat and slammed his gloved hands on the table which caused some of his brothers to shoot up as well in alarm. Simeon gripped onto MC’s arm, panic gripping the angel at the sight of the dark malicious aura that manifested around his friend.

“You.” he raged, his regal face contorted in fury which really didn’t do anything to make him look less appealing.

“May I please request that the Demon Lords kindly take their seats,” Barbatos finally spoke after staying silent throughout the meeting with only the scratching of the quill against parchment being the sound that came from his place on the table the whole time. “And may I also ask that you two heathens stop the game or put it on hold for the time being so we could proceed with the meeting.”

For a moment, Diavolo and MC, whose jaw dropped, simply stared at Barbatos. When their gazes met, they broke out into laughter.

“I lose!” MC sputtered between fits. “I have to give it to Barbatos this round.”

Heathens!” Diavolo hollered, hunched over the table with the side of his fist pounding against the wooden surface. “He called us heathens!”

“It’s not even funny but when it’s Barbatos it’s peak comedy,” they whined. “It’s not fair. How are you this effortlessly funny?”

“But I have to applaud your attempts too, MC. I almost lost it at the spontaneous ‘Great Demon Overlord Fuckface’ after all the low-level compliments. If Lucifer hadn’t stood up and startled me at the second time you would have won this round.”

“Damn it, Lucifer!” they pointed an accusing finger at the extremely baffled demon who could only look at the two gleeful students.

“What is heck going on?” A desperately confused Mammon cried out amidst the boisterous laughter.

“You see,” MC started, calming down from their hysterical high. “Lord Diavolo and I have a little game-”

Barbatos cleared his throat, “May I remind everyone that we still have details to smooth out before this meeting adjourns?”

“Yes,” MC straightened up in their seat. For the nth time that day, they caught Diavolo’s gaze and after a beat, with the most posh voice they could muster, keeping Shakespearean plays in mind, they turned to the butler, “Thanketh thee f'r remindeth us, thou scandalous flap-mouthed nut-hook.”

It took quite a while for Diavolo and MC to calm down from that.