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Limerence

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Limerence is a state of mind which results from a romantic attraction to another person and typically includes obsessive thoughts and fantasies and a desire to form or maintain a relationship with the object of love and have one's feelings reciprocated.

 

 

 

 

 

Oikawa finish setting up the dinner when the hour shows exactly 7 o’clock. He uncertain whether to call Tobio or just come in to his room because of their conversation before. He decided the later would be much effective.

Oikawa saw from the outside that Tobio’s room was dark. Did he already asleep? That’s out of habit.

He knocked the door.

“Tobio, are you sleeping?”

Oikawa welcomed by silence.

He knocked again.

“I’m coming in. No flying pillow this time since I’m already asking for your permission.”

There were another silence.

Oikawa shrugged and turned the doorknob. His hand wander around the wall looking for light switch. When the light finally come in to his sight, he didn’t see Tobio’s pretty face anywhere. Instead, there was a pile on the bed with a pinch of black hair at the end of it. What is it this time?

Oikawa walked closer and squat down beside the bed equalizing the height with the rolled-up-inside-the-blanket Tobio. He lifted his hand on top of Tobio’s hair and pet it softly.

“Tobio, you need to eat your dinner first.”

Tobio only move his blanket down until his chin. His ocean blue eyes staring at Oikawa purposefully. Oikawa tried to digs what’s in there. Sad, angry, disappointed, desire? Oikawa tried to recall his memories. Oh, this situation ever happened before. When middle school Oikawa forgot to tell elementary school Tobio that he had other circumstances that won’t allowed him to play with him that day. That’s result the sulking Tobio refuse to got off from his bed all day and Oikawa need to bribe him with a lot of milk box. Oikawa wonder if that’s still gonna work for now. Just in case.

“Is there something happen?” Oikawa ran down his hand from Tobio’s hair to his cheek and his thumb caressed it. It’s really soft. Is it possible a high school student for having a baby cheeks or it’s just Tobio? It’s must be just Tobio. For sure.

Tobio didn’t answer. Instead, he got up from sleeping position to sitting. He still had his blanket covered him, from the top of his head and his hands held the blanket embraced him leaving only his face to be seen. Oikawa clenched his fist. He has no business to be this cute.

Oikawa folded his arms looking at Tobio patiently when yet again the younger boy still refused to said anything.

“So?”

Tobio bite his lips. His eyes wander around his room escape from Oikawa’s demanding one.

“Tobio, look at me. Tell me what’s going on.”

Their eyes met and Oikawa braces himself for any storms that will approach him.

“I was just talking to Tsukishima. He is the one with glasses.” Tobio saw Oikawa flinched but Tobio sweep his curiosity away.

“What were you both talking about?”

Tobio looked so terrified he didn’t dare to saw Oikawa in the eyes. Oikawa swore he will scheming Tobio with anything he could since he was so damn curious.

“He said that maybe I’m, uhh, in love?” Tobio himself didn’t sure with his choice of words.

“That’s not something strange, Tobio. You are at age to feel something like love. It’s okay, no need to be so confused.”

“The thing is that, i don’t sure about the one who i love.” Tobio dropped his sight in to the floor in his room. Is the floor always that brown? It’s so ugly.

“What did that four eyes do to you? Did he turned you down? Did he hurts you anywhere? Do you want me to revenge? I’m ready to throw hands.”

Tobio’s eyes widened in disbelieve.

“What? No, no it’s not him. Why would i like him. He doesn’t even has a single kindness in him. He always mean to me.” He scowled.

“Thank god.” Oikawa feeling somewhat relieved. “So, who is that person who get the privilege to being loved by you?”

 

“It’s you.”

 

 

Oh.

 

 

“I’m sorry, what was that?”

“It’s you.”

“Jesus Christ, Tobio, at least change a few letters.”

“Eh, but I-..”

Tobio stopped when he saw Oikawa waves his hand.

“Just to make sure, i heard you in the first time, okay. Just to make sure, you mean to tell me that you fell in love with me.”

Tobio only nodded his head.

“Since when?”

“I don’t know?”

Oikawa sighed in defeat.

“What make you sure that it’s love? It’s maybe just some, i don’t know, admiration? Familiarity? Since we both know each other since we were kid.”

“That’s what Tsukishima said before.”

Oikawa clicked his tongue.

“So you gonna believe everything that four eyes said?” Oikawa didn’t mean his words to coming so harsh.

Tobio looked like he about to cry. The next thing Oikawa knew, a pillow hits his face and then fell on the floor with a soft tud. One pillow followed by others while Oikawa didn’t move an inch.

“Get out.” Tobio voice cracked it’s hurt so much.

When Tobio runs out of pillow he reached for his school bag at the desk and throw it too. This time Oikawa shirk over.

“I said get out!” Tobio proceed to throw his penguin doll only for Oikawa to catches it. Tobio looked at him with bleary eyes. His shoulders heaving as he gasping for breath.

“I’m the one who get you this.” Oikawa stated as he looked at the doll.

“When you were seven. You saw a man get the elephant one from the toy claw machine for his daughter, and i can tell you envy her even though you refuse my offer to get you one too. You said you dislike stuffed animal because it’s childish, but i get you one anyway. I’m so touched you still keep this after all these years, Tobio.” Oikawa gave him a small smile.

Tobio still at his anger to realize that Oikawa has remember more about them than him. He leaned forward and extended his hand to take back the stuffed animal.

“Give it back, it’s mine.”

Only for Oikawa to lifted his hand high enough for Tobio to missed it.

“Listen to me.” He demanded.

“No, don’t say a word. Just give me that back and leave me alone, please.” Tobio begged.

Oikawa put down the doll. He pulled Tobio by he wrist and put him in his embrace. He felt Tobio struggle against him as he tried to release himself but Oikawa tightening his hugs.

“Tobio, please listen to me a minute. I’m sorry about what i did before, i didn’t mean it like that. I’m sorry.” Oikawa whispered on top of Tobio’s crown as his hand stroked Tobio’s back.

Instead of calm him down, that action made Tobio even sadder that he begun to cry. Tobio himself was perplexed as the small acts of Oikawa would made his heart vacillated even though his friends were already said the worst things to him but none of them would made him this resentful. What Oikawa said earlier was nowhere compared what Tsukishima or even Hinata said to him but oh well.

“Are you that disappointed you liked me? That’s why you crying so hard?”

Tobio jerked off his head so fast that made Oikawa worried about his neck safety. Tobio looked at him with bleary eyes while tried to look threatening.

“What do you mean? I’m not crying because of that.” He tried hard to answer between his sobs.

“Then why are you looks so dreadful when i asked who’s the person that you love?”

“Because you said you didn’t like me before.” Tobio averted his gaze. “You already rejected me. There is no point for me to telling this.”

It’s took Oikawa legit a minute to gain his consciousness.

“You mean what i said in the kitchen before?” He tested.

“Yes, what else?” Tobio nagged.

“Oh my god.” Oikawa really need a professional help for how much energy he used to deal with this kid. “Tobio, you can’t just asked people if they love you out of blue, can you understand? They need time to...think. It’s not as simple as choosing over milk or yogurt. And i thought you were just joking.”

“I still need time to choose milk or yogurt, though.” Tobio growled.

Oikawa took note. He needed to go to sauna after this. The audacity if this kid in front of him to argue when not a long time ago he thrown thing like a fucking toddler he is.

“Yes, my love. That’s so you.” He refused to argue any further or else he gonna lost his sanity.

Tobio’s face was as red as tomato upon hearing what word Oikawa used to address him.

“Don’t call me that.” He demanded.

“Hmm, why?”

“You don’t love me.”

“Who said that?”

“Huh, you? You told me before.”

“As far as i can remember, i only said i don’t have crush on you, though.”

“Isn’t it the same thing.”

“No, love, it’s not the same.” Oikawa grinning at him.

“Stop it.” Tobio groaned.

“No again, love, especially now i know that you feel the same.”

“...”

“...”

“What?”

“You heard that right.”

Tobio stuttered, “B-but,..”, only for Oikawa to cuts off,

“I don’t have crush on you, anymore, since I’m already in love phase. Does that help?”

Tobio stare at him with piercing eyes.

“Stop making fun of me.”

“I’m not. Tobio, can you at least trust me this time?”

“I can’t help it. Who’s the one who tricked me in daily basis.”

“Right, it’s me. But I’m being serious now.”

“Really?”

“Really really.” Oikawa rolled his eyes.

“Since when?”

“Since the very first time maybe. The fact that I’m willing to be your babysitter since we were child even though i barely know you brought me to my realization in the first time i saw you after years. I just like you, and then my feeling growing, maybe something like that. I’m not a professional in the field of love.”

“But you are Iwaizumi-san best friend. You can’t help it to be with me too. Also my mom asked you this time.”

“I swear to god why can’t you just accept it. Do you need explanation in everything? And just for your information, your mom didn’t asked me. I volunteered. Of course indirectly. ” He gave a half shrug.

“How?”

“Well, we’ve met before. By accident. I told her since I come back here she could entrusting you anytime. Wait, do you need me to explained too how, when, and where did we met?”

Tobio only gave him a small shake of a head. Tobio bites his inner cheeks as he received all the information into his brain.

“Anything else you would like to ask?” Oikawa asked.

Tobio glanced at him and shook his head again.

“No, you sure? So i won’t face any other sulking Tobio again?”

“I’m not sulking.” Tobio pouted.

“Of course you are not, love. Nah, since it’s turns out that we took the time too long to fix the misunderstanding, I’m afraid our dinner already turns cold. Let me warm it while you tidy up your room. How about that?”

“Okay.”

“Okay.” Oikawa planted a chaste kiss on his cheek and then walked out from his room leaving Tobio with flushed face staring at his bedroom floor. Is the floor always that brown? It’s beautiful.

 

 


 

 

The next day, Tobio bought Tsukishima the cake that he promised.

“Kageyama, how about me?” Hinata protested.

“Shut up you dumbass. I bought him this because he helped me before.”

Tsukishima chimed in, “And, how’s that going? Are you confessed yet, King?”

“I told him, and he said he likes me too.” Tobio couldn’t stopped the blood that rushed to his cheeks.

“Eww, disgusting Yamayama.” Hinata echoed.

Yachi giggled while patting Tobio’s arms, “Don’t mind him, Kageyama-kun. Hinata just jealous that you got a boyfriend before him.”

“Boyfriend?” Tobio repeated confusedly.

“Eh, yes? You said you confessed before.” Yachi asked back. She was as confused as him.

“I don’t remember we talked about boyfriend.” Tobio tilted his head slightly.

“So you both just said you love each other, and that’s it?” Tsukishima couldn’t believe his ears. In the back Hinata was laughing so hard till he bend down and hold his stomach.

“Yes. What’s wrong?”

“No, nothing’s wrong, Kageyama.” Yamaguchi interceding. “Stop it you guys. Maybe Oikawa-san just waiting.”

 

“Waiting? What was he waiting for?” Tobio asked.

 

“Waiting for you to grow some brain cells.”

 

 

All of his friends can no longer hold back their laugh.

 

 

 

 

 

Tobio wanted to unfriending his friends.