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sleepless night

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When Joe couldn't sleep, Nicky couldn't either. It was not like he was being inconsiderate with lights on and unnecessary noises; it was the way Joe moved in bed, turning from one side to the other, his hands unsure if he was holding Nicky too tight, sometimes not even touching him at all. And Nicky? He was the most patient guy in the universe, according to his family, and he would usually turn around and talk to Joe about his concerns, but at that moment he couldn't act; in fact, he was about to combust because he was as exhausted as one would be after two days without getting any proper sleep during a mission.

— Yusuf? What's happening? — Nicky blinked, eyes trying to remain shut, but his mind started to anticipate the answer and what if- what if Joe was about to tell him he was no longer healing? Well, trying to sleep was no longer an option.

— Would you have loved me if we were not immortal? — his voice carried the weight of the last two days without seeing his husband's eyes, without sleeping with his warmth in the bed, without touching him.

That question was definitely not what Nicky was expecting; he raised an eyebrow, biting his lower lip. If he was honest with himself, the thought had never crossed his mind before because he already knew the answer. He was always honest, especially with Joe, so he shared.

— We would be dead.  — he answered in a slightly cold tone. It was a simple fact.

Joe sighed and Nicky turned to watch the minute his husband sat down and buried his hands in his own hair; a look of pain mixed with frustration for receiving  the wrong answer all over his face.

— No, no. Would you love me if we had met during dinner to discuss the event where my step-mother and my dad would renew his vows?

That was oddly specific.

— You've put some thought into this, haven't you? 

Nicky sat too, resting his back on the pillow as his hand moved to Joe's back while rubbing circles there in an attempt to bring some comfort. He felt how tense Joe was and a smile almost appeared in the Italian's face the minute his husband relaxed a little when he felt Nicky's touch.

— Nile and I watched this show when you and Andy were away. It was well written, a nice piece of work, we laughed a lot- it was great to bond with her. I'm trying to find things to do with her because she misses her family and even though this was definitely not a routine because she was a marine, we had a good time. Popcorn, chocolate, we even ordered pizza. 

Nicky couldn't stop himself anymore. He was grinning. The man next to him had been the love of his life for a little less than a millenia and Joe still found ways to make Nicky's heart beat faster and smile like everything was a new discovery.

— There were two seasons, alright!?

I have no idea what it means, but sure. Nicky made a mental note to ask for clarification later. He nodded.

— Okay, in season two the protagonist falls in love with a priest. — Joe looked at Nicky in a loving way, like he always did, but this time something was different. He had doubts. — And Nicolo, pay attention, — he closed his eyes and grabbed Nicky's arms, holding them with a certain desperation, before looking at him again; it was when Nicky understood that he not only had questions, he had already created certainties in his head. — She asked him if he was going to choose God or her and he chose God. 

That was the easiest concern to dismiss because it was in Nicky's veins, in his heart and in his brain since the day they had put their swords down. 

— Yusuf, he may have chosen God, but God chose me. — he answered, his hand moved from Joe's back to his cheek and he caressed it sweetly, almost like Joe was made of porcelain. — God chose me to love you. Period. You're my miracle, my blessing. That's how I see it. That's what it is.

— Nicolo, — a whisper came out of Joe's mouth, before he pulled Nicky by the shirt to kiss him. — I love you, habibi. — he whispered against Nicky's lips.

— I love you too. — he answered, a smile on his lips; he rested his head on Joe's shoulder, eyes almost closing. He was so tired.

— I'm sorry for disturbing your night. — Joe kissed his forehead, touching Nicky's waist gently to indicate that they should go back to their usual position; legs tangled, Joe's arms around his husband, face buried in his neck.

They were almost falling asleep when Nicky realised he had never answered the actual question.

— For what it's worth it, I would have chosen you. — Nicky murmured, and he could feel Joe's smile against his skin.