1:18pm 15th Sept
Cornnuts added Ihavethebraincell to the conversation
Cornnuts: It’s been three weeks
Ihavethebraincell: since what????
Thegrinch: dw heathers just a cryptic texter half the time
Thegrinch: shes referring to when you joined us in hell
Ihavethebraincell: oh cool
Goldenretriever: Hi Ronnie!!!!!
Ihavethebraincell: hey mac!!!
Ihavethebraincell: very noice username
Cornnuts: EXCUSE ME
Cornnuts: MY USERNAME IS FUCKING AMAZING
Thegrinch: its about fucking corn nuts
Ihavethebraincell: urs is about the grinch tho?
Thegrinch: yeah cos i despise christmas like the grinch
Thegrinch: heather just likes corn nuts
Ihavethebraincell: lmao why do u not like christmas
Thegrinch: cos my extended family are annoying as fuck and i hate them
Cornnuts: Me and grinch girl chose heathers username as she is pure innocence and to wholesome for this cruel world
Thegrinch: *grinch girl and i
Cornnuts: Fuck you grinch binch
Thegrinch changed their username to Grinchbinch
Grinchbinch: thank you for referring to me as my full name
Goldenretriever: Lol you all think Im innocent
Goldenretriever: Jokes on you Im a bastard
Goldenretriever: Anyway whats your userbame supposed to mean
Goldenretriever: I cant believe that this is where our friendship ends
Grinchbinch: bruv u wish
Cornnuts: Did you just say bruv
Goldenretriever: Let Veronica answer the question about her username!!!!
Ihavethebraincell: lol its cos me,jd and betty have like one braincell and i have it most the time
Ihavethebraincell: hence my 2000iq
Cornnuts: What about dumptruck
Ihavethebraincell: firstly dunnstock secondly shes a funtual human being unlike betty whos fucking feral, jd whose an angsty emo and me whos just sad
Cornnuts: Right whatever then i forget calling her that gets you all riled up
Ihavethebraincell: yea cos shes my friend
Grinchbinch: destroy her ass ronnie
Cornnuts: Shut up Heather
Grinchbinch: sorry heather
1:38pm 15th Sept
Ihavethebraincell: hi welcome to another episode of im regretting all of my life choices that lead up to where i am rn
Feralchild: oof sucks to be u
Martha<3: Oh no Ronnie, what did you do?
Martha<3: And that’s not nice JD! What is she’s in serious trouble!
Feralchild: im sure shes fine like the worst that could happen is an accidental murder
Notasferalchild: How tf can a murder be accidental
Notasferalchild: Like murder is intentanal
Feralchild: fine if it was accidental it wouldve been manslaughter
Martha<3:We are going off topic!
Martha<3: Ok so Ronnie, what’s happened?
Ihavethebraincell: its nothing serious im just questioning why i chose to join the heathers
Notasferalchild: questioning that as well
Ihavethebraincell: like one minute were just chatting and then the next duke and chandler are in mood with eachother while me and mac just kinda stand there unsure of what to do
Ihavethebraincell: and then theyll insult one of youse and then be surprised when im upset
Ihavethebraincell: its just really draining being friends with them
Ihavethebraincell: well friend is a bit of a stretch their more like coworkers and our job is being popular and shit
Martha<3: I’m sorry you feel like that Ronnie. Just remember that we’re always here for you [heart emoji x3]
Ihavethebraincell: thanks yall
Notasferalchild: omg jds rubbing off on u
Notasferalchild: dont become southern on me bitch
Feralchild: no join me in the depths of hell
Martha<3: Hey are you all able to hang out tonight?
Notasferalchild: u see ronnie that is how you refer to everybody
Notasferalchild: and ye im able to hang
Feralchild: i aint got nothing else to do so ill come
Martha<3: Okie dokie! Should we meet at the park at 4pm?
Martha<3: We would be able to hang at mine but it’s my turn to walk Lenny so… yeah.
Ihavethebraincell: thats cool well meet there then
Notasferalchild: am gonna steal ur dog martha
Ihavethebraincell: betty no
Notasferalchild: betty yes
Martha<3: Don’t worry Betty, I’ll let you walk Lenny :).
Notasferalchild: martha what did i do to deserve you
Martha<3: Being my friend.
Notasferalchild: ok im just going to happy cry goodbye
Martha<3: Nooooo don’t cry
3:05pm 15th Sept
Cornnuts: @Ihavethebraincell Tonight
Grinchbinch: she just want you over at hers tonight
Ihavethebraincell: oh thx
Ihavethebraincell: sorry cant me martha betty and jd already have plans
Cornnuts: delete them
Ihavethebraincell: my friends or the plans????????
Cornnuts deleted two messages
Ihavethebraincell: i saw them
Cornnuts deleted Ihavethebraincell’s message
Cornnuts: The plans
Cornnuts: Delete the plans
Ihavethebraincell: that isnt going to happen
Ihavethebraincell: ive flaked on them enough times already from joining your little lipgloss gestapo
Cornnuts: Fine then tomorrow morning your history
Cornnuts: Unless you can convince me otherwise ;)
Ihavethebraincell: ok then…
Cornnuts kicked Ihavethebraincell out of Traffic Lights
Cornnuts: Fuck fuck fuck fuck
Goldenretriever: You shouldnt have done that
Cornnuts: I KNOW I SHLOULDNR HAVE DOME THAT
Grinchbinch: here we see the texts between a useless lesbian and her calm friend 2020 colourized
Cornnuts: SHUT UP HEATHER
Grinchbinch: sorry heather
Cornnuts: YKNOW WHAT FUCK IT IF SHE REALLY WANTS TO BE IN THE HEATHERS THEN SHE BETTER FUCKING COME AND BEG
4:30pm 15th Sept
Martha<3: Betty stop yelling
Notasferalchild: THIS FUCKER HAS NO GAG REFLEXE
Notasferalchild: U DONT GET TO SPEAK U DEEP THROAT FUCKER
Feralchild: how tf else are u supposed to eat an ice lollie
Notasferalchild: FUCKING BITING IT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON
Ihavethebraincell: who tf bites a ice lolly
Feralchild: WHO THE FUCK DOESNT
Ihavethebraincell: M E B I C T H
Martha<3: Betty I don’t think most people bite ice lollies
Notasferalchild: well fuck them there doing it wrong
Notasferalchild: the only person who is allowed to not bite ice lollies is lenny
Feralchild: the only valid licker tbh
[JD is sat on a bench with a fruit pastel ice lolly in his mouth looking at his phone, eyebrows furrowed]
Notasferalchild: in fuvking cxackling
Notasferalchild: amd distgustaed tha u can fit a entire ice lol in ur mouth
Martha<3: Is it not hurting your mouth at all?
Martha<3: Like they’re really thick
Feralchild: theyre dummy thicc
Ihavethebraincell: im just going to start carrying around a spray bottle of soapy water so i can spray u when u say shit like this