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I Found You

Summary:

After breaking it off with her husband of 13 years, Katara goes to the Fire Nation with her kids. She just wants a change of pace, a chance to catch up with her old friend and move forward but ends up getting much more than she'd bargained for.

Notes:

Guys this is my first fanfic ever and I’m so excited yet so scared. Excited because I’ve convinced myself to try my hand at something new and scared because I don’t want to mess up this story that has grown into something beautiful in my head. But I’ve long since got tired of waiting for someone else to do this, so it’s time to take matters in my own hands. PS: I’ve never watched TLOK, just read enough metas etc online so bear with me. Trigger warning: marital issues and divorce.

Chapter 1: Katara realises a Vacation is in Order

Summary:


Artwork by the absolutely wonderful @momochi_owo on Tumblr!! I cannot thank you enough for this. It nearly made me cry when I first saw it. The background is the summary for this fic.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text


It had been a month at that point.


A month of tears and questions and confusion. A month of people staring at her, at her necklace, at her kids. A month to the day Aang had flown off on Appa, no explanations given to anyone. A month since she’d broken it off with the only man she’d ever truly been with.


The first week had been the worst. She had had to come to terms with what she’d done. How she had perhaps irreversibly fractured the future which she’d laid out for herself at the tender age of 14. She hadn't been able to leave their home in that week. She’d reminisced over the good times…


You’re my forever girl


Which had been immediately followed by the bad: the crushing loneliness, the feelings of inferiority, the horrible last argument and all the arguments leading up to it. She’d shut herself in, refusing to see anyone. The kids were with Sokka anyway. He had come by, every day, twice a day to try to talk to her. Towards the end of the week, Hakoda had started coming too. He’d just sit outside waiting for her and leave by evening. Suki had just checked in once to say she’d take care of the kids. But Katara didn’t want to see anyone. She didn’t want to cry. She just wanted to swim in the cool pool of memories and the good old days, when nothing was so quite so complex and occasionally wallow in some self-pity. When it had got to be too much, she had tapped into her secret stash and drank until she couldn’t remember anymore. It had been an ugly morning after when Suki, tired of waiting had finally broken into the house, stale with the smell of vomit, alcohol, left overs and week-long grime. Katara had wondered how she'd appeared to her: long, wild hair unkempt, dark circles under possibly bloodshot eyes with clothes on that she hadn’t bothered changing for the last few days. She must have noticed that there was the old blue band around her neck again instead of the yellow but had chosen not to say anything. After Gran-Gran’s passing, Suki was the only other woman in the family, and Katara had never appreciated their bond as much as she did in that instance.


Suki had simply cleaned up and cooked and stayed. Made her some tea and got her to take a bath but kept quiet otherwise. Katara had to appreciate that her cooking had improved by leaps and bounds over the years - although Sokka was the better cook, penchant for experimentation notwithstanding. Finally, by evening, Katara had managed to gather the strength to rasp out her first words in days, “Aang and I are over”.


You’re my forever girl


“For real? Or is this a break?”


“For real, I think. I did return his necklace and tell him we’re done.”


Suki hadn’t asked her if she was sure about her decision or anything about what happened that night, and Katara had realized that even with all the saving each other’s lives they’d done as kids, she had never appreciated her more.


Instead she’d asked, “Is that all there is to it? With all the ceremony for your wedding, isn’t there a… longer process?”


Katara sighed, “The Water Tribes don’t really do divorce. It’s considered shameful. You know that. And the Air Nomads had no concept of marriage in the first place. We’re winging this as we go.”


“Oh.”


“Yeah, oh.” Katara had said derisively.


Suki had seemed to think about this a bit and then said, “I stand by what I said that day, you know. We are on your team one hundred percent. You can talk to me whenever you’d like, you won’t see any judgement here. But I strongly advise talking to Sokka sooner rather than later. He’s going up the walls with worry and you know what that means”


“Stress eating?” Katara had asked smiling wanly


Suki considered this a small victory. “We are going to run out of food,” she'd confirmed.


“I’ll talk to him first thing tomorrow.”


“Good. I’ve got to head back now. It’s late and I need to make sure the kids or Sokka haven’t turned the house into a heaping pile of snow yet,” she'd said as she turned to leave.


“Suki?”


“Yes?” she'd asked, turning around.


A beat.


“Yes, Katara?”


“Nevermind.”


The next morning she’d cleaned up and gone to see Sokka, who was now the acting Chief of the Southern Water Tribe, a mantle he’d accepted only a year ago. He’d begun his family years after Katara had. This was primarily because Suki had needed time to find a way to juggle her duties on Kyoshi Island and now as the Chief’s wife. And also because as a man he simply didn’t have the same pressures she traditionally did. Even now, Suki still travelled to and fro often. They’d had Yue, a beautiful daughter, a non-bender but the pregnancy had put a strain on her. And knowing what happened to Mai, it had been mutually decided that one child was more than enough.


Sokka had been more than overjoyed to see her. He’d bear-hugged her for a solid 5 minutes as soon as she set foot in the room. Over the years, her brother had only grown taller and stronger, and his hugs too had changed.


“Let go… Sokka… choking… me.”


He’d let her go his eyesight immediately falling to her neck where instead of the 13 year old yellow band with its wooden pendant, lay once again their mother’s old necklace in its seat of honour.


She’d seen his face go through a range of emotions: shock, anger, concern before settling into a grim line. “What happened?” And as she’d looked at him blue eyes to blue eyes the exact same shade and shape their mother’s had been, it had felt like she couldn’t stop the flow of tears that she’d kept at bay next to Suki. Here was her brother, her best friend, her partner in crime. They’d barely ever been apart since childhood. If he couldn’t understand her, who would? It was like a dam had broken somewhere and an inescapable torrent of emotion had just burst forth. He held her through it all. She was shepherded inside and made to sit on furs. A mug was thrust in her hands and the whole story came tumbling out. The whys the whens.


Somewhere in the middle of it all had come a small voice, “Mom-?”


“Room, Bumi. Now.” You couldn’t say no to Sokka’s Tribe Chieftain voice.


And the horrible sobbing had gotten worse. It had felt like all the frustration and fear that had accumulated over the week had been leaking out. Then some time later there had been the rambling “they’re all going to hate me, all of them, what have I done? I have kids. What will Dad say? He will hate me, won’t me. I’ve caused an international incident and now we’re in trouble.” Somewhere along the way, her speech became incoherent. After around 15 minutes of this she’d just started hiccupping.


Patting her back, Sokka tried his best to console her “Shh shhh. Okay. Okay. First: Dad will totally understand. You know he was never fully on board with you marrying Aang in the first place, clash of cultures and all. Second: as the leader of the Southern Water Tribe, I can guarantee you that there will be no repercussions. We are strong in ourselves and Aang’s not one to take out his anger on others.” Katara sniffled, not one to argue with that logic.


“Finally, the kids will understand. Might take ‘em some time but they’re good kids and they love their mom. It won’t be easy, but we’ll get you past this. We will. You trust me, don’t you?” It had taken a lot more convincing and talking. They’d even called an ‘Emergency Meeting’ with their dad who, as promised, was completely understanding once he’d been told of what had happened.


Chief Hakoda, now with streaks of white in his hair, had never been one to mince words, “I support you, no matter what. You’re my daughter and nothing could take away from that. But you have to realise that we’re simply not a progressive people. Sokka and I will always have your back but I can’t say that for everyone else and you know it.” She'd nodded. She loved her home but she knew all too well that there was still a lot of regressive thinking prevalent, courtesy of the Northerners who’d brought their outdated values and prejudices with them when they moved down South. It was sometimes the only reason Suki left to go to Kyoshi, and Sokka would then get her back a few weeks later. Attitudes were changing, but not fast enough.


She was pulled from her thoughts by her father staring at her sharply. “Katara, I’ll ask you this just once. Are you sure?” His forehead crinkled in worry.


You’re my forever girl


“Yes.”


“Okay then. We’ll consult the elders tomorrow since there really isn’t too much of a precedent for this,” and as she’d moved to head home, Sokka had insisted that she stay with him.


The next day, she’d had to state her case to the elders who had all looked at her distastefully, but knowing her status as healer and war hero, couldn’t do much else to ‘punish’ her. She’d then had to explain to the kids what had happened, and it hadn’t been pretty. They had wanted to know if they’d see their father again. They had wanted to know if he still loved them, if he’d fought for them. They had wanted to know if it was their fault, her two eldest especially.


“What about Tenzin? Tenzin needs me! The world needs him! 
“You aren’t even going to argue about Bumi and Kya? You never take them with you, always praise Tenzin in front of them even after we’ve argued about this multiple times! They feel guilty about disappointing you, about not being airbenders. Do they matter so little?”
“Stop putting words in my mouth Katara, you know as well as I do that it’s imperative that I stay in Tenzin’s life to rebuild my culture. I don’t intend to die as the last airbender.”
“Oh it always comes back to YOUR CULTURE doesn’t it? ...”


“Of course he wanted to stay with all of you. He loves you all. None of this is your fault.”


It had taken a while to convince them. Even then, she was sure they hadn’t grasped the magnitude of the situation. Bumi was 12 so he did, and she watched in pain as he withdrew into himself. He’d always been a loud child and an incurable prankster. Always one to live up to his namesake, but he’d gone quiet. The only person who could bring him out of his funk had been Sokka occasionally. The kid adored his uncle.


8 year old Tenzin was still mainly confused and kept expecting his dad back any day now. It was always depressing answering his excited “Is he here yet?” with a negative every time. Perhaps it was a good thing he had a bubbly Yue his own age to keep him occupied.


Katara honestly thought Kya had been handling it well. She’d always hero worshipped her mom. There had been some crying but nothing they couldn’t handle. Until one day, she came hurtling through the door and screamed, “It is not our fault he’s gone, it’s YOURS!” at Katara. Apparently she’d heard some women talking earlier. Nothing flattering had been said.

Surprisingly, it was Bumi who had risen to her defence immediately. He’d yelled back at his sister to “Stop yelling at Mom!” and then pulled her away. Katara had felt her heart physically breaking.


She had heard the whispers too, try as she might to pretend they didn’t exist. Her own people calling her horrible things. Home breaker. Soulless bitch. Slut. She’s going to die alone now. She thinks she’s better than the Avatar? He can do so much better than her. This is why women shouldn’t be taught bending. Makes them think they’re superior to us all. Those poor kids…


There had even been quite a few women who with the best of intentions had given her tips on how to ‘appease her man’. Each suggestion had made her more nauseous than the last.


A week ago the council had nearly pushed her out. Apparently her prowess as healer and master waterbender meant nothing if she couldn’t hold her home together. Sokka had gone ballistic that day. Parents of her students wouldn’t meet her eyes and some had even stopped their kids from attending her academy, afraid that she’d ‘rub off on them’. These were people she’d healed. With whom she’d spent cold winter nights huddled in the communal hut singing their poems. Telling their stories.


It had felt like each day the fight had gotten worse. Her kids were angry at her, her community hated her and she was just so so tired. So that night, a month later, she went to Sokka in his room. “I should call him back, shouldn’t I?” Sokka startled, dropping the boomerang he was sharpening. “This will all go away. We might be happy again. I’ll apologise. Say it was hormones or something. Convince the elders somehow. They already think poorly of me, it can't get much worse. At least the kids will have an easier time of it,” she said morosely.


Sokka moved to grip both her hands tightly. He sounded panicked when he finally spoke “No, Katara. Don’t do that. Please.”


“Why not? It’s the easiest way out. Besides what do you want me to do? We both know that this can’t go on. I can’t stay here like this”


“Okay listen, I really didn’t want to say this, but please don’t go back to him. Aang is my friend too, and I was glad you two found each other though I really could have done without the oogies.”

“Hey, as if you and Suki are much better, and where exactly ARE you going with this?”


“It’s rude to interrupt your elders, Katara. Where did you learn those manners. Let’s sit. We need to discuss this. Back to what I was saying. I’m glad you found each other but all those years when you were with him, it was like you weren’t yourself anymore.”


“What do you me-”


“No, no listen to me! You’ve gotten yourself captured to free prisoners, you’ve fought and healed on the frontlines of a war and travelled all over the world but after you got with him, you just… changed? I don’t know when or why. I can’t pinpoint it. But it was like a ghost Katara. You have to understand, I grew up with that terrifying girl. To see her vanish in front of my eyes was… awful. Now I see a spark of her back in you, and I can’t let that go. Give me some time, we’ll figure out something else. Just don’t call him back.”


Katara was struck dumb. With wide eyes she asked, “Did... did all of you think that?” Sokka actually looked a little sheepish and said, “Well, Suki and I may have talked about this once or twice, but you know dad likes to keep his own opinion, and I don’t really know about anyone else. It’s been so long.”


And it had. The last time she’d met Zuko or Toph had been when? At Suyin’s birth? That had been 6 years ago. Toph hated the ice. She couldn’t see on it and Zuko had an entire country to run. As for Katara, she had stuff to do here too right? Take care of her family, heal, help Sokka. She wished she could meet them again. Toph would say something crass and sarcastic while Zuko would… she liked to think he would be there for her too. They had grown close to each other in the summer before his marriage. She remembered sparring at dawn, afternoons by the turtleduck pond, quiet conversations by nightfall. Then she’d gotten married and moved back here. They’d kept up with their letters for a while but then those had stopped too. She wondered why.


And there she had her answer. It must have struck her brother at the same time because his eyes lit up.


“You could visit Toph.”


“I could visit Zuko.”


“I mean, that’s cool too. Zuko did promise that we’d have a place there whenever we wanted it. I remember he swore on his honour,” he snorted. “Besides, he has a whole palace, and the kids haven’t seen the Fire Nation yet have they?” Sokka asked.


“No, they haven’t. It’s summer now, the Cherry Blossom might be in bloom.”


“Then that’s decided. There’s a merchant ship docked. It leaves in two days. Go with them.”


“Two days! Sokka, are you sure?”


“You doubt me? MY plans? Tell me ONE instance when they’ve failed. Ever.”


“Seriously? We might just end up sitting here all night.”


And that’s what they did. Midway through, Suki joined them, and Katara felt lighter than she had in a long time.

Notes:

Edit: finally getting myself to re-read this stuff after my beta pointed out the grammatical errors. Glad to say that there aren't too many inconsistencies though I feel that I ought to clear some stuff up. The Air Nomads (according to me, a lot of meta, and other fics I've read) didn't have the concept of a nuclear family. Hence, there was no concept of divorce, definitely not something that Aang would remember at age 12. The Water Tribes value the Tui and La dynamic and hold sacred the institution of marriage. Especially the North that has distilled and purified its sexist traditions over nearly a century of being closed off to the rest of the world and they have set up camp in the South. Thus, there isn't much of a precedent for what Katara has done and is really brave, considering the community she lives in. This is why it would be relatively easy to call Aang back because there was no paperwork or excessive formality to be done.
Also, Gods above is this chapter sad. The sadness continues for a while before getting better. I commend those readers who've stuck with me so far and promise the new readers that I've got good stuff in store for our girl too.
Idk how the Avatar Studios news is going to impact the fandom and the ATLA world, please bear in mind that this was written a fair couple of months before news of this and the 15 yr time jump got out.

Chapter 2: Farewells

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

It was night, and she was sitting on the threshold of her home looking into the far distance.

Waiting.

It had happened again. They’d gone over this before and it had happened again. He’d up and left with Tenzin for an ‘airbending training trip’. They were used to these by now, though. He’d come and go mostly as he pleased during the summer months and even during these, he’d take off with Tenzin for days at a stretch. He never stayed during the colder months. She understood why of course: he despised wearing animal pelts and he couldn’t regulate his temperature all the time in winter. She thumbs the yellow ribbon around her neck and looks up at the star spangled sky.

Waiting.

Kya and Bumi had been upset obviously. Though over the years even they’d grown to expect it somewhat. She had successfully managed to put Kya to sleep after wearing her out with bending practice. Bumi had been more difficult. He had insisted on waiting up with her, going so far as to sneak out of bed all of five times. It was finally Sokka who had sent him to sleep with detailed “battle plans” of all his “great victories”. Her mouth lifts up in a smile.

But now, thoughts of Sokka just send her back to that last glance he’d shot her while leaving. He hadn’t said a word. Not one. Not that he needed to. After all these years, she knew what he was thinking. She was thinking it too as she looked up at the heavens.

Waiting. 

It seems like it's all she does these days. Oh yes, she heals. She looks after her ever growing tribe. She holds a seat on the council, more out of Sokka’s insistence than anything else.  And she undertakes the most important task of all: raising the Avatar’s children. A woman’s true duty. Take care of home and family. For more than a decade, she had done just that, rebuilding, rarely leaving. Playing her part. She has a responsibility here. She’s the Avatar’s wife.

Dimly, Katara wonders if today’s acolyte of honour is taking care of Tenzin.

An hour. She should probably head inside. One more. Next thing, Sokka is waking her up. She’d fallen asleep sitting up and he needs her help on the trade rights issue. She can’t bear to look him in the eye.

Now, a little over a year later, she looked once again in his eyes as she said her goodbyes.

It had been a harried two days. Since having Bumi 12 years ago, she could count on both hands the number of vacations she’d had and all of them had been with Aang. Though to think about it, he never was very helpful so his not being here could only be seen as a plus.

She’d gone about it methodically, packing all the necessities and then some. She remembered how red everything was in the Fire Nation and remembered to pack their blue quilts, whale bone ornaments, their sealskin clothes. Although none of it would be very useful in the tropical climate of the Fire Nation, never mind their extravagant fashions, she’d hoped to repurpose it to some extent during their long journey. She had also made sure to get extra rations of seal jerky. The rest of the world just didn’t know how to salt their meat right. As it were, she’d have to have a talk with the cooks regarding how spicy all the food was.

She had handed over the running of her academy to Nanurjuk, the first of her new students to become a master bender and supplied another of her students to replace her in the healing hut. She had the sneaking suspicion that their otherwise all-male council had been glad to see her leave even if it was temporary, going out of their way to wish her fair skies and favourable seas.

The kids had had mixed reactions. Bumi seemed to be cautiously happy, Kya clearly did not want another change thrust upon her while Tenzin was happy to travel with his mom for once. But then their grandfather had sat down with them and talked about the Fire Nation’s sandy beaches, lush forests, colourful birds (and decidedly not the squalor of their prisons) and that had seemed to do the trick. In hindsight, this was a double-edged sword because now Yue had decided she wanted to go too and was alternatively nagging her parents or holding silent protests.

When the morning of departure came, there was a small party to bid her farewell: her family, her students and most of the people of the original Southern Water Tribe along with quite a few immigrated northerners. After the month she’d had, this outpouring of support made her quite emotional.

“Ah great, she’s going to start tearbending again” Sokka complained and Suki snickered. “Now all we’re missing is an impromptu speech on the power of hope.”

“Sokka, you’re such a fucking idiot I swear,” she said lowly, smiling despite herself.

“Dad!! Katara said a bad word,” he laughed but the meaning behind her words was understood.  “I’ve written to Zuko to give him a head’s up, but haven’t told him what happened. Figured that’s up to you.”

She nodded. “Also about the fishing rights issue…”

“Katara, it's fine. I’m sure we’ll be able to sort it out.”

“Write to me. About anything. And everything. I want to know. I want to help.”

“I will. Promise.”

They hugged each other tightly and Katara whispered, “Thanks again Sokka. For everything.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll miss you too.”

She let go and chuckled, “Try not to screw up too badly when I’m gone. I still intend to come back here.”

“Har. Har.”

Hakoda’s hugs were as tight as ever even with his failing strength. “You’re pulling a Gran-Gran,” he said, pulling back to grasp her shoulders.

“I kind of am, aren’t I?” she wondered. “Except that I do mean to come back.” Her father just smiled at her sadly. “She would be proud of you. I am proud of you. My beautiful daughter. Not for nothing did you receive the mark of the brave. ” 

“Dad! You’re not making this easier!” she sniffled, hugging him again and he chuckled.

Just then, Sokka butted his head in the middle. “I know I was teasing you about the Speech of Hope thing but I think these people really are expecting one.”

“What? What am I supposed to say?”

“I don’t know, just channel 14 year old Katara. It’s what I do when I need to motivate people … or actually public speaking of any kind” he shrugged. She didn’t know if this was a compliment or insult. In fact she couldn’t believe her teenage self was more inspirational than she was right now.

So Katara just squared her shoulders and went to walk a little way up on the gangplank and turned to face everyone. It was a larger number by far than she’d spoken to at once in the recent past. She felt a little green. From the crowd, Suki gave her a discrete thumbs up.

“Who is she? Why is she addressing us?”

“That’s the Avatar’s Girl. She’s supposed to be a war hero too.”

“Well tell her to get a move on. We want to see the Avatar! He’s so handsome and funny, what does he see in her anyway? She’s a regular stick in the mud.”

“Don’t mind them, Katara You know you are perfect. My forever girl. Though I think it’s better if I take it from here.”

Pushing past the sudden nausea, she took a deep breath and memories of a different time flashed through her head. Talking to generals in the Earth Kingdom. Inciting a mutiny on a prison boat.

She could do this.

“Friends, family, I see all of you gathered here today and I am so overwhelmed. We have come a long way have we not? From our small village with its single saviour...” Here she smirked at Sokka, who bowed his head “...to the booming community that I see. The Water Tribes truly embody the spirit of family. In those days, we stuck together and built a life for ourselves against all odds. Now, after more than a decade of working alongside each other, we have a city to rival our sister tribe and better trade relations and supplies than we have ever had in the past. Water is the element of change and we have adapted remarkably to the changing times and ushered in a new era of peace and prosperity. We have welcomed new members to our family including more waterbenders who continue to amaze me every single day with their feats, be it healing or combat. Your achievements are yours alone, borne of your determination and hard work, and I’m glad to have been given the chance to guide you. We have all of us shared many moments together, happy and sad, all of which I am grateful for and as I embark on another journey today, I thank you all for coming here to see me off and supporting me in these times.”

There went up a loud cheer and as she made her way down again, she was shocked to see a face-splitting smile on Sokka’s face and actual tears in his eyes before she was accosted by her students. They surrounded her, talking over each other, trying to get her attention. “None of that excuses you all from daily practice!” she yelled. “I will be receiving weekly reports!”

It actually went on for quite a while. People wishing her a safe journey, telling her they’d miss her presence, that the place wouldn’t be the same. At one point, Bumi came up to her and squeezing her hand softly said, “You spoke well, Mom”. Tenzin grinned toothily and nodded from behind him.

 Finally, the captain loudly reminded them that they still had a schedule to stick to. The second time he did it, the crowd seemed to let go of her and she made her way to Suki, patiently waiting her turn.

“Take care of them, sister.” She said as she hugged her.

“You know I will.” Suki said, pulling back. “Take your time there. Give the jerkbender hell. Tell him he still owes me for what he did to my village.”

“How long are you going to keep playing that card?"

"Hey. That card has never failed me. That card is the best. You could say it is the Phoenix King of cards or wait, gimme a second I might be able to come up with something better”

“No, no Suki, we’ve been over this. No jokes.” Suki pouted comically and Katara snorted.

“Chin up soldier” were the last words she said to her as Katara turned to leave. 

With her hair in her old braid complete with hair loops, wearing her travelling clothes and her mother’s old necklace she felt 14 and ready to take on the world again. With one last look at her family, she started up the gangplank, pulling the kids from their weepy goodbyes. Yue was all out bawling at that point with Tenzin awkwardly tried to comfort her while sniffling himself. Bumi was also clearly fighting tears. “You are allowed to cry you know,” Kya smirked up at him. “Shut up. I am a man. We don’t cry.”

“Pretty sure I saw Uncle Sokka cry.”

“Wait, what?!” and he rushed to hug him one last time. Sokka returned the embrace, ruffled his hair and pushed him away.

As they set off, the ice getting smaller in the distance, she could feel a shift in the air, maybe a whiff of excitement, maybe a bit of hope. 

Notes:

So for this fic, I had two versions of Aang to work with. The sweet ball of sunshine we saw till season 2 and the entitled Nice Guy we saw s3 onwards. Because this fic plays out between the comics and TLOK, I've decided to go with the latter. Also, for the sake of the fic, Katara is 31, Zuko is 33, Sokka and Suki are 32. Bumi is 12, Izumi and Kya are 10, Tenzin and Yue are 8. Because this is my fic and also because I doubt they would have waited for 15 years of marriage till they finally got an airbender kid. Same goes for Zuko and ensuring his line of succession remains intact.
Edit: Reading it again, this feels a little unsatisfactory to me, but I'm terrified of the ramifications on the fic by clubbing two chapters or deleting a whole chapter. I am super proud of the speech that I came up with though. It was a spur of the moment thing.

Chapter 3: The Journey There

Notes:

Hey everyone! Thank you for reading till this point. A light word of caution going forward : I do not claim to be an expert on the stuff my characters are going through and nor is this fic going to be a deep dive on divorce. I’m trying to be as empathetic as I can, but do heed the trigger warnings and get back to me if I’m being insensitive (but be nice about it pls).
PS: trigger warning: divorce and separation

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

After the war, she had wanted to go back home. They’d been away long enough and now the war was won. They had accomplished all that they had set out to do and then some. The world was finally at peace. So the Southern Water Tribe was where they’d stayed, for a while. It had been nice to see Gran Gran and the rest of them again. She had so many stories to tell, so many homemade meals to eat, so many new abilities to show off. She’d missed her living quarters, she’d missed the ice and snow and glorious sunsets. Then her Dad and the rest of the warriors had returned and it had been lovely. There were so many tears to be shed, both happy and sad. Even with all that they had lost, they had come out of the war alive. They were a tribe reunited. Those few weeks might have been some of the best in her life.

There was also a lot of rebuilding to be done, a fact that was made glaringly obvious as more Northerners arrived and subsequently received a rude shock about how different the living conditions in the two sister tribes were. She had helped out with Pakku in the early stages and some of the planning but they had soon realized that this would require time and effort: maybe years of it. It was then that Aang had grown restless. He was a nomad. He was the Avatar. The world needed him, which is why he needed to travel and he needed her with him. How could he do without her? She was the only constant he’d known since waking up a hundred years later to a horribly changed reality.

 Katara never turned her back on people who needed her. And right now, it was her boyfriend who did. There were more than enough waterbenders to replace her in the construction work.

So she had spent nearly three years on Appa’s back. Sokka accompanied them on some of their adventures while also having some of his own. She helped where she could: she backed Aang up in battle with men and spirits, she supported him in councils where he argued the lost philosophy he was taught as a child (some of which she didn’t understand herself, truth be told) and stood by his side on stage in front of the adoring masses. Aang was perfect as the Avatar: he was charismatic, helpful and kind, not to mention a truly powerful bender. On those rare occasions that he got angry, she was always able to calm him down.  The people loved him, as did she. He was their saviour, their beacon of hope. He was perfect.

Sometime in the middle of it all, they had stopped referring to her as Master Katara and started calling her the Avatar’s Girl. Because that’s what she was, wasn’t she?

 Sokka was the next Chief of the Southern Water Tribe, a strategist, a genius and an inventor. Toph had her ever growing Earthbending Academy and the title of the First Metal Bender ever and The Greatest Earthbender in the World (which went unquestioned once old, mad King Bumi finally kicked the bucket). Zuko was the Firelord, the man who was almost single handedly turning around the economy of a warmongering nation and bringing about great peace. Suki was a highly trained warrior, head of the Firelord’s personal guard and leader of the Kyoshi Warriors. She had started teaching more young girls the world over the way of the fan and was greatly respected for it. Aang was the Avatar, of course. And she was the Avatar’s Girl: master waterbender, healer and the envy of every young woman.

Her tribe seemed to know it too when she finally made her way home. If you could even call it that at that point. The marriage age of girls was 16, which she had long since passed, but no one pressured her like they did the other girls. There were no men lined up for her hand, betrothal necklaces at the ready. Instead everyone would talk about her proudly, make some innuendo about air and water and then smile cheekily. She herself had wondered if she’d gotten married without realizing it. They all seemed in on it but the only one who out right confronted her was Gran-Gran. She had asked her if he’d proposed yet. Katara had actually snorted, “He’s 15!” Her grandmother had just looked on grimly. She had asked her if she was happy. Katara had been confused. She had everything a girl could want didn’t she? How could she be unhappy? Her old grandmother had just looked sad.

“You don’t look yourself, child. I hope you realize it soon.” But she hadn’t deigned to elaborate. That had just served to confuse her some more. Now she understood Zuko’s frustration with his Uncle. Old people never gave a straight answer.

Aang had been called urgently by Zuko and she had decided to stay for as long as she could, trying to get used to her father's new girlfriend and this new version of home. Sokka seemed to have an easier time of it. But then, he had always been easy going. Aang returned the next summer: the summer of her 18th year. The problem at the Fire Nation Palace had been taken care of. Apparently it had been quite an adventure which had only served to bring Zuko and Mai back together once again. They would in fact be married within the next few weeks and there would be much celebration! According to Aang, she absolutely could not miss out on Fire Nation festivals and a Royal Wedding would be a very big deal. Team Avatar could reunite again! Katara was excited to see her friend get married. And so it was decided that that’s where they would all go.     

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Leaning against the railing, she inhaled deeply. En route to the Fire Nation once more, somewhere between the mountains that housed the Southern Air temple. It was night time and she was on the deck. The moon was out, washing everything in a silvery glow. They’d been at sea for more than a week now. With nothing to do, she had been stuck with thoughts rattling around uselessly in her head. What was, what is, what could have been.

It had not been a good time.

Despite it all, she felt strangely light and her element surrounding her gave her solace. When the whirlwind in her mind picked up speed or made sleep impossible, she would stand by the bow, sea spray tickling her, salt in her hair. Katara sometimes spent hours there at a stretch. No one dared question her. She also practiced her bending every night under the moon. It gave her peace, stilled her mind (and it tickled her to freak the sailors out with exactly how powerful she was). The first week she’d been at it alone. Then Kya had given in and joined her. They had practiced wordlessly for a few days, maybe just pointing out mistakes and correcting them. That was how she thought this session would go too, and that’s exactly what had happened, except halfway through, Kya dropped her form.

“Why? Why did you do it?” she asked, softly at first, looking out onto the sea. Put off guard, Katara did not know how to respond and after a while just crossed her arms protectively while looking downward.

Impatient and annoyed, Kya finally looked at her and started shouting in an increasingly rising pitch, hands turned to little fists by her sides, “Why? Why? I deserve to know! Why did you leave him? And don’t tell me it was the other way round!” Her little frame was trembling, and the sea was rolling in time to her anger. Of course it would. She was her daughter after all and equally, if not more powerful.

“Do you not love us anymore? Do you not care?” And that snapped her out and she’d pulled her below deck somehow. This conversation was not for prying ears, and she was afraid that the ship had enough of those.

Sitting her down on the bed, she crouched so as to be on eye-level with her. Blue eyes: the same shade as her mother’s and her mother before her. “You’re a big girl Kya, and you deserve to know. I’m sorry, really, that I didn’t give them to you earlier. I still can’t explain everything right now…

“Ugh”

“It’s too painful, my star. I did not want to burden you, and some answers I don’t know myself, but I will try to tell you as much as I can.”

She took a deep breath and started, “So, see the thing is I know that you’ve learnt that once you marry someone, you’re bonded for life and that is the meaning of true happiness and whatnot. I believed it too for the longest time. It is what we are taught in the water tribes after all: that every marriage is as inevitable and complete as Tui and La, but…” And here she fidgets playing with her braid, “I just wasn’t happy, my love. And it’s not your fault or your brothers’.” The fidgeting continues but she holds her gaze. “I tried so hard, for so many years, convinced that this was what my life should look like, but I was lying to myself. Your father is a good man, a great man, and he will stay your father. That won’t change. He’s upset at me right now, not at you. But… I just don’t think we’re right for each other. I am sorry it took me so long to realize.”

"You.. you were unhappy?" Kya asked her with a tremulous voice. Katara nodded.

After a while, Kya followed up quietly with -"Was it our fault?" 

"NO! Not at all! My love, the reason I held on for so long was the three of you. It was not you fault. None of it. It was your dad's ... and mine..."

More silence and soft sniffles. Then-

“You’re not going to go back to him are you?” Kya asked, voice trembling, wiping away snot with one hand.

You are my forever girl.

Katara shook her head, tears gathering at her eyes, “No, I’m not.” As she said it, she knew it to be true. The future was unclear and unmapped but she’d made her decision and would stick to it, for better or worse.

“I understand why you’re angry and you have every right to be. I would have been furious too. It's only fair. ” She pressed her wrists to her eyes to stem the overflow. She had to be strong. There was silence in the room save for the soft sniffling now coming from both of them. Katara gathered her thoughts and made to speak but her daughter beat her to it.

“I heard you yelling at Dad the other day about us.” Katara gawped at her, eyes wide “You were angry because he only paid attention to Tenny and not to us.”

“Oh no, my star. You were not supposed to hear that!”

“It’s okay, Mom, I’m a big girl, you said it yourself. You can’t protect me from everything.” She then continued more quietly, “That was another reason wasn’t it? Why you left?”

Katara just nodded again. “I didn’t want you to find out this way. I didn’t want you to blame yourselves. Because that is on him. That he didn’t treat you equally. He still loves you, it’s just terrible being the last of your kind.”

“You’re still making excuses for him.” She had nothing to say about that.

There were tears dripping down Kya’s cheeks which Katara wiped away. “I think I get it Mom,” she said after a while with a tremulous smile. “I think it will be okay”.

They stayed up some more, mostly in silence broken by a question or two on Kya’s part to do with how long they’ll take to get there and what they’ll do once they reach. That night was the first time in a long while that she sang her daughter to sleep next to her in bed.

After that, the journey was smoother. It seemed like the prospect of a holiday and a change of scenery had affected them all. With every passing day, she felt a little more light. Her mind actually let her sleep for hours on a stretch on some lucky days. Kya was talking to her more, Bumi seemed more chipper too. She wondered why he hadn’t brought up the topic with her the way Kya had, so she’d gone to speak to him about it.

“I really don’t want to have this conversation Mom. It’s fine, I understand.” Katara did not think it was fine and she said so, but he simply wouldn’t discuss it. After the third request to “Drop it mom. Seriously.” She let it go. At least he didn’t look mad at her. Sometimes she wished her children hadn’t inherited her stubborn streak. It made everything so much harder.

Tenzin seemed to have convinced himself that their dad had taken another of his long vacations but in summer this time.  Katara had tried to hint otherwise in regular conversation, but these hints were never well received by any of them and she absolutely detested bringing it up. She was only dreading the day it would strike him, especially because she was afraid her son might be as much of a flight risk as his father.

The air had gone from crispy cold to thick and muggy around a week after her talk with Kya. They were moving at an abnormally fast pace primarily because waterbending practice now involved propelling the ship forward clear through the Sea. After more than three weeks of travel, they were nearly upon the Fire Nation Capital. Red banners had started showing up a few days back. They’d stopped in one port town along the way where she’d bought an extra large pack of fire flakes as a joke for Zuko. She remembered how he’d added them to everything when they were camping together. The real gifts were of course the blue dyes and jewellery that had been sent with her.

The town, small as it was had been a bit of a culture shock for the kids. The red clothes with their different cut had Kya staring with her mouth wide open. That had been a little embarrassing but less so than when Bumi had to be nearly pulled out, frothing at the mouth from a shop selling spiced meats. Thank the spirits, Tenzin was a quiet child.

“We will see all this and more in the Caldera. Right now, we are on a schedule,” she had chastised after indulging them for a bit. Yes, definite proof she was turning into Sokka. He would asphyxiate with laughter if he could see her now.

After that, excitement on the ship grew palpably and she had to applaud the captain’s patience when he answered an “Are we there yet?” at least 20 times a day from each of the kids. She herself had not yelled at them yet because she could feel it too. The excitement. It was in the air and the scents it carried, it was in the sea that had changed colour, it was in the stars that formed different constellations, it was in the beaches and lush greenery they saw from afar.

A startled shout pulled her from her thoughts. It had become twilight already, how long had she been standing here? It seemed Kya had gotten mad at Bumi again and iced over the deck. Again. Bumi had promptly gotten his ankles stuck and fallen on his butt.

“Kya, don’t freeze your brother” she said exasperatedly as she melted the ice.

 “He was teasing me about Magic Water again!”

“Bumi don’t bully your sister”

“Tell her not to be so bullyable – OH!”

They turned around to look at what he was pointing at. They had rounded a turn and the Gates of Azulon loomed up ahead. Looked like they had reached it earlier than anticipated. The two majestic statues on either side quickly grew larger and suddenly, she was back to the day of the invasion. Then too the two statues had levelled their judgmental stares at her. She and her family and nearly everyone she loved risking their lives for a chance at taking down the Fire Nation. She had come so close to losing them all. And then there had been the kiss. 

The difference was that now she was an honoured guest. No hostile missiles met her, no burning nets. Instead, in the pink twilight, Caldera City docks twinkled in the distance.

“We’re here! We’re here!!” Bumi yelled as he and Kya rushed to lean over the railing.

“Mom! Let’s make the ship move faster!”

“Not this time. I’m going to get Tenzin and make sure we’re packed. Do NOT lean too far ahead.” She doubted either of them heard her as they continued staring in the distance, all wide-eyed wonder.

When she got back up, they had reached much closer, probably because Kya had started bending by herself. Katara sighed.

“Kya, stop it. You’ll tire yourself out. We’ll get there when we get there. For now, enjoy the view.” And what a view it was. Vessels of different sizes seemed to have sprung up around them apparently from thin air. The bay was lined by thousands of shimmering lights which resembled the fireflies local to the area. These, along with the pink of the sky were reflected in the water, now disturbed by naval craft that were either moored or sailing by. A breeze was blowing and it carried with it distant sounds of a Tsungi Horn from somewhere. A soft, lilting tune. And although the place smelled of fish and sea salt, the scent of fire lilies seemed to flit through her mind.

And wasn’t it weird that just then she felt a slight prickle on her neck, hairs standing up.

Zuko.

Almost involuntarily, she smiled.

Soon, individual figures could be made out standing on the docks. One group especially grabbed her attention. There was a man standing at its head with a ramrod straight posture, a flame shaped head piece in place, flanked by six others and an even larger group waiting in the back, forming a protective circle. It looked like the Firelord himself had decided to grace them with his presence.

Notes:

So, I think that considering Katara’s mental state, she wouldn’t have divulged too much when she had her first conversation with her children. Bumi fully accepts the flimsy explanation because he heard more than he should have the day Katara wept to Sokka (which will come up later), Kya blamed herself (even now, she doesn’t fully understand how unconditional and impartial a father’s love should be) while Tenzin has convinced himself that their dad is off on a long vacation after an argument. This chapter was initially supposed to feature more Zuko but it got a bit too long. I think that mother-daughter moment was necessary though. Just to clarify for the uninitiated, Bumi is a non-bender, Kya is a waterbender, Tenzin is an airbender.
Side Note: I love ofbuttsandbombs, she is quite literally the best.

Chapter 4: The Palace

Notes:

This one took me some time because it's a two part flashback in this chapter and the next, so you can expect the next one sooner!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

They travelled on Appa again. Her, Aang, Sokka and later Suki and Toph when they picked them up. She would never get tired of how excited her brother got whenever he was reunited with Suki, who was really looking forward to the wedding too, especially because she’d gotten much closer with Zuko over the years when she’d served as the head of his Royal Guard. Toph had been to see him a couple of times and seemed to be thriving: her academy was going great, she was on much better terms with her family and she also had a suitor who she absolutely refused to talk about. Even Aang had changed: over the last few months, he had grown, with his extra inches, he was taller than even Sokka. He’d been in and around the Caldera for a while, rounding up what Ozai supporters he could find and building up support for Zuko and the New Peace. It felt nice catching up with everyone in person and not just via letters. Katara herself mentioned that she was teaching some of Pakku’s students and working in the healer’s hut while also helping with the last of the rebuilding. At this statement, Toph had asked impatiently, “And?” Katara had been confused. “And what?”

“And what more are you doing sugarqueen?”

“She’s a healer and a waterbending master Toph, what else would you have her do?” Aang had laughed. “She’s also the tribe’s favourite, everyone loves her. Isn’t that right, sweetie?” Katara only smiled back at him. “Besides,” he continued, “soon the two of us will be travelling again, best not to make too many people depend on her back there.”

 They would travel?

 Again?

When was this decision taken?

She felt eyes on her, and Suki sensing her discomfort, changed the topic. But the whole conversation did not sit right with her. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to travel again for some time, but if he’d asked, she’d probably have agreed anyway, so she couldn’t put a finger on why his statement upset her.

Flying on Appa meant they did not have to go through those gates and relive memories of the invasion, which was a relief. They simply landed in one of the inner gardens of the Royal Palace and frightened a couple of gardeners. Zuko had not expected them for a few more days at least so all the servants got really distressed that rooms weren’t ready and service wouldn’t be up to the mark. Of course none of them really cared. What was important was that they were reunited again. All of them, after years. There was so much to be discussed.

Katara wanted to know every single detail of what she had missed in the others’ lives, Suki wanted to assess Zuko’s current Royal Guard, Sokka and Aang wanted to take an active role in wedding planning, Toph wanted to provide the Fire Nation some much needed statues of herself, Zuko wanted to keep the gardens safe from Toph and his wedding safe from Aang and Sokka. Between the five of them, they managed to convince Zuko to take a day off for the first time in months.

But somewhere, at the back of her mind, The Conversation kept niggling at her. The first night, she tossed and turned, unable to sleep. The second was a full moon so she gave up and went to practice her bending by an isolated fountain near the edge of the grounds. On the third, she was interrupted.

She sensed him before she saw him and had a dagger of ice ready before he spoke, “Stop Katara, it’s only me.” She recognized that voice.

“Zuko? What are you doing here? It’s past midnight!”

“I could ask you the same? And it’s MY palace.” He said, stepping out of the shadows.

“Why are you wearing- Oh wait. You were sneaking out, weren’t you?”

“What gave me away? Was it the black clothes?” Zuko snorted. “I thought Sokka was the detective.”

“I am ten times the detective Sokka will ever be. Now tell me, where were you?”

“Erm... out.” There was enough moonlight to see his nose scrunch up and eyes widen. She held in her laughter.

“Oh, really? And what’s in that bag?”

“Uh… rice cakes. That man only sells late at night.”

“Share them with me then.”

“I um ate them all?” Right on time, Zuko’s stomach rumbled in the silence. And it was Katara’s turn to snort.

“How can you be a politician and such a terrible liar, Zuko?”

“Fine, I’m a liar.” He huffed. “That doesn’t explain what you’re doing here.”

“I was bending.” Katara said haughtily.

“This late?” his eyebrows shot up.

“The moon.” She said by way of explanation.

Still, he prodded, “The moon has been up for hours now.”

“Fine! I couldn’t sleep, alright! Sue me.” She said, getting annoyed. Not five minutes alone with him and he managed to get under her skin.

He was silent for a while, as though contemplating her words. “Do you… want to talk about it? I could make some tea to relax you.” This startled her. Sometimes she’d still be surprised by this Zuko, not the arrogant and hot-headed prince who’d hunted them years ago. When she didn’t respond immediately, he quickly followed up with, “I’ve gotten much better now, Mom says she likes it and Uncle can actually stomach it these days, don’t worry. Okay, that does not sound reassuring.” Katara wondered how the housekeeping even let the Firelord near the kitchens, and Zuko took the moment of contemplation as hesitation because he then blabbered on, “On second thought, if you’d rather be by yourself, you’re more than welcome, sorry for bothering you, I’ll just go away-"

“Okay, stop.” She said, holding her hands up. “Wait, wait. I’d like to take you up on your offer. That sounds lovely.”

They stole in through secret passages in the Palace without the guards knowing. Who knew that the tapestry of the ugly Fire Sage hid a secret door to the Fire Lord's chambers? When asked about the security issues, he was flippant, "Ah, don't worry. No one else knows about it."

Katara was not convinced."If you say so," she sighed.

He apparently had a private tea room in his apartment suite and called for some rice cakes while he steeped the leaves. Once they were comfortable, he asked her. “If you want to tell me what’s wrong, I’m all ears.”

She sighed. Might as well. Zuko wasn’t one to break confidence. “I’m thinking about my relationship with Aang.” He only furrowed his brows. “It’s just that I get the feeling sometimes, that he doesn’t really see me. Like he takes me for granted.” That last part had just spilled out. She wondered where it came from and in the ensuing silence, he asked, “Have you tried talking to him about it?” he asked while sipping his tea.

“Talk to him about what? He’s always so considerate of me, so romantic. And he thinks so highly of me. The other day he got me a whole bunch of roseblossoms, for no reason. I don’t want to make a mountain out of a molehill. We don’t really fight. I don’t want to change that. We’re happy.” Why did it have to sound like she was convincing herself?

Zuko furrowed his brows a little more. “If I were uncle, I’d understand right away and offer you a proverb for all your problems. As it is, you’re stuck with me and I’m a little confused.”

So Katara, between sips, replayed the conversation that had gotten her so worked up. When she spoke it out loud, she seemed to realize exactly what it was that had troubled her. “It doesn’t feel right, Zuko. How could he just assume that I’d go with him? I probably would, but he can’t take decisions on my behalf like that! This is good tea by the way.”

“I think you should tell him. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt, it is to let it out instead of keeping all your feelings bottled in. You guys have known each other so long, I’m sure he’d understand. And thanks.”

“It’s not just this one thing, though. I think it may be many smaller instances. They sound so trivial. You won’t get it.”

“Try me.”

Katara shook her head. “It’s stupid. Some of these are ages old and some are ridiculous. I personally let them go at the time.” Zuko looked like he was about to interrupt, with a finger raised, but Katara was faster. “Nuh-uh. You want me to tell you all my secrets yet you won’t even tell me where you’ve been.”

“I went to see Mai. My heart yearns for her,” he replied readily.

“You’re lying again. But at least this one isn’t an insult to my intelligence.”

“How did you know?” He asked, genuinely confused.

“That’s for me to know and you to find out.” She smirked. “Seriously though, why won’t you tell me? I’m your friend. I’m worried.” 

At this, something seemed to shift in his expression. For a single moment he seemed sad before a mask fell. “There’s nothing for you to worry about. I can take care of myself.” Picking up the tea things, he said “It’s late. I need to get changed. Goodnight, Katara”.

She was confused. What just happened? “What’s wrong? Did I say something? Did I do something wrong?” He shook his head, “It’s nothing.”

Wait. Zuko was upset. He was legitimately upset. With her. How the tables had turned. She didn’t know what to do so she just sat wringing her hands as he turned his back to her. An idea. “Okay... So, um… I was thinking, we haven’t sparred in ages, would you like to have a go? Or are you afraid I’ll beat you again like every other time?”

That got his attention. “Tomorrow, at dawn,” he finally replied.

“Of course," Katara said drily. "Who needs sleep?”

They sparred the next morning. He won and she demanded a rematch. She won the morning after that. And the morning after that. Katara had forgotten how exhilarating sparring with him was. She hadn’t had this much fun in ages. There was no holding back, it was an equal give and take of two master benders. As the days got hotter, he took to removing his upper garments and she suddenly began a losing streak with her focus all over the place. The guards half the time didn’t know if they should run in and protect their ruler or not. Zuko seemed to enjoy them too, but there was no progress made with him. He’d run off with some excuse or the other. They all had dinner together, she saw him in the passageways, he brought Mai along to some of their wedding planning sessions but she never got him alone. He hadn’t returned to the fountain again. Not to mention that she still hadn’t talked to Aang. One afternoon, a few days after their talk, she decided to resolve the one thing she could and went to find her boyfriend. When Appa’s stable didn’t work, she tried the gardens. She hadn’t expected to find Zuko instead.

He was sitting by a pond in one of the inner gardens, feeding the turtleducks. There was a sakura tree above him and carefully tended shrubbery and firelilies ringing the small pond. His headpiece was laid aside so that hair fell on his face and shoulders. The turtleducks seemed to love him, clambering on his lap and nipping at him. She hadn’t seen him look more at peace than he did in that moment. Disturbing him felt like a crime. So she stood in silence behind her tree for a while, just observing.

“Do you want to feed them too?”

She startled “How did you know I was here?” He just shrugged.

So Katara came by and sat next to him. Here was her perfect opportunity to broach the subject, but she faltered. So they just sat in silence for a while broken by the quacking of what she thought were the cutest creatures she’d seen. He looked deep in thought as she took the grain from him.

“Did you talk to him?” he asked, still not looking at her.

“Not yet,” she replied.

More silence.

She sighed. “Please tell me what’s wrong, Zuko.”

“Nothing’s wrong.”

“You’re lying.”

“I am not the person you should be confronting.”

“That’s neither here nor there. Zuko, please. Just tell me what I did.” He simply pinched the bridge of his nose. “Zuko-”

“NOTHING, KATARA, you haven’t done anything. That is the point.” He nearly yelled out. The turtleduck that had snuggled up and slept in his lap frantically flapped away. “Do you know the number of assassination attempts I survived? The crap I had to go through with the people who should have been trustworthy? How difficult it is overhauling an entire economy, education system and council of ministers that is bred only for war?” He was getting more agitated. “Do you know the stuff I was going through during the Yu Dao fiasco? Suki was with me through it all, Sokka always wrote, Toph visited too from time to time, Aang was just here sorting out that shit with the Ozai loyalists. You never visited, almost never wrote, and the only reason you came to help with Mom is because I called Aang! I thought we were friends, Katara, what happened?”

And in that moment she felt wretched. She’d written some perfunctory letters but hadn’t visited because she was fully committed to travelling with Aang and hadn’t really kept in touch with any of the friends she’d made while travelling. She’d gone where she thought she was needed most. Had she really just blocked out everything else? Now that she thought about it, she was on good terms with Suki and Toph only because they had joined on some of their adventures. In fact, she had hardly spent any time by herself for herself, out of love and duty. When she told him this, he just looked sadly at her.

“You sound different these days Katara,” she looked up at him sharply. She couldn’t help but feel like he was echoing Gran Gran’s sentiments. “You have no say in where the two of you go, what you do and you still wonder why he takes you for granted?” That one got her right between the ribs. She wanted to protest that they were happy, that Aang was the perfect boyfriend and explain why exactly his assessment was so wrong, but this was neither the time nor place.

“I’m sorry, really sorry. I wish I could go back and change things. I don’t even know how to ask you to forgive me or where to start,” Katara replied instead, wringing her hands.

Z uko finally looked her in the eyes and sounding perplexed, said, “You’re sorry? Honestly, after everything I’ve put you through during the war, I don’t think I’ll ever be done being sorry. As it is, I’m lucky all of you took me into your group. I just thought that after what we went through together, maybe we’d …bonded, that we understood each other better, perhaps it was just me.”

“No, Zuko, this is all on me.” She said, latching on to his hands. “I am in the wrong. Let me make it up to you, please?” He didn’t reply just looking at her with wide, confused eyes and she went ahead and hugged him – an awkward, sideways hug. He didn’t return it as such, but leaned into her. Good. She’d take her small victories. Also, Katara noticed that he smelled nice: a combination of the clean sandalwood smell of expensive soap and faintly- woodsmoke - ? It was soothing and she leaned into him to get more of it. They sat in silence for the rest of the afternoon. Except now she felt that it was more of a companionable silence than before.

Later, she had her talk with Aang. He was confused and kept asking, “You don’t want to travel with me anymore?”

“It’s not that. I love travelling. Maybe I don’t want to right now, but that’s not the point.”

“I don’t get it. Why not? You’ve always enjoyed it. We've had a great time right?”

“I think for now I’d like to spend more time with friends and family. It’s good to have people who love you around you.”

“But you stayed at home for so long.”

“It’s still not enough. Everything’s changed so much, I want to get used to it a little. They need me there. I also want to stay here for a while with Zuko.”

“I was thinking of visiting the outer islands...” he said wistfully.

“You can still do that. I’ll wait for you here,” she replied firmly. She had a say in her relationship, she decided, no matter what Zuko, that bird-brained idiot thought.

“But I love you sweetie. I need you too,” Aang said, and he finally pulled the largest weapon in his armoury: the sad puppy-panda face. Internally, she groaned; she hated hurting him, but she had to be strong.

“And I love you, but I need this,” she said, putting her foot down. He visibly deflated but she had to soldier on. 

“Also Aang, maybe next time, don’t take decisions for the two of us by yourself? I didn’t like it when you announced our plans to everyone without consulting me. We are a team, aren’t we?”

At this reminder, he smiled. “Yes, we are. I thought you didn’t want to travel with me and Appa anymore. Got me a bit worried there.” Now that he towered over her, he could fully enfold her in one of his hugs. With his chin on her head he said, “You are my forever girl, Katara. I’ll let you know before deciding for the two of us in the future.”

She was fairly certain there was a small Toph in her head yelling that she didn’t need anyone deciding anything for her; that she was her own person but then she remembered herself. Baby steps. Aang would understand, she just had to go about it in a way that didn’t hurt him too much. So although she was still unsure that he’d actually got it, she let it go. That night she saw Zuko by the fountain, again in his black clothes. “I did it,” she told him. He only nodded at her.

But he came back to spar with her, and she sat and fed the turtleducks with him the next day. And the next. And the next. It was a ritual of theirs. A few days later she caught him sneaking in once more and asked to speak with him.

“Uhh Katara if it’s advice you want again, I’m really not too great at that, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment instead?” She’d actually cracked a smile. But considering that he was the only one who had ever been in her current situation, she went ahead and asked him anyway.

She asked him what it had felt like, coming home after 3 years of banishment: if it had lived up to his expectations. He seemed surprised that she was bringing this up now, but still spoke of exactly how out of place he’d felt.

“The home I remembered was lazy afternoons with mom, summers on Ember Island with family, sword fighting and firebending training, a palace staff that knew me. Everything here was the same: the gardens, Ember Island, the Palace itself, but also, somehow things couldn’t have been more different.” Zuko sounded sad, like he was grieving something which he had lost with no hope of regaining. 

That just about summed up her situation back South, Katara thought, and together they explored over hours what it meant when what they’d considered home had become more of an idea than anything else. She told him about the new version of the Southern Water Tribe, the one she’d missed out on as it had taken shape. “Nearly nothing is the same anymore, not the people, not the village, not Dad. They all moved on, and they did it without me.” It was the first time she’d voiced her thoughts, but he seemed to understand. 

The next night, he snuck out of the Palace instead of sneaking in from outside. This time, she asked him about his mom. It had been on her mind for the last few days. He seemed to consider for a second then sat next to her on the edge of the fountain and told her: about his mom, his new sister and step-father. She tried to be as supportive as he had the previous night, but she could tell that there were some bits that he wasn’t telling her. They came out over the next few days. As well as her true thoughts on her father’s new girlfriend, Aang’s fan club and Sokka and Suki’s relationship, his hopes and fears about Azula, the farmer's revolts in the Wester Sector and what Sokka's plans for the bachelor's night were. Despite his self-deprecatory comments, he was a good listener and it helped that they had such common opinions.

Some things she hadn’t confided in anyone else, but under cover of darkness, with the gush of the fountain behind her and him by her side, she felt like she could talk about anything and everything. There was nothing outside this little bubble of theirs. She was surprised; if anyone had told her a few weeks ago that she would have nightly heart-to- hearts with the current Fire Lord and erstwhile Angry Jerk, she would have laughed out loud. But soon, these became an indispensable part of her daily routine and over the days, they leached into their afternoon sessions too. They still hung out with everyone else, but these meetings of theirs were sacred and an unspoken secret. There would be no discussing them or anything that had been discussed in them with anyone else. Sometimes, she caught Toph looking at her oddly, but the girl wouldn’t say anything.

One afternoon, after a particularly stressful wedding planning session, he got frustrated and told her exactly what the barebones of the ceremony were supposed to look like. “This is how it’s supposed to be! Not this gaudy monstrosity that no one but Uncle or Sokka will enjoy.”  

“I’m certain I will enjoy it too." She pointed out cheerily.

 “Yes, go on.” He huffed. “Laugh. Cheer while you watch my soul being sucked out.”

“Well, it’s better than ours, anyway.” She said sourly, “It used to be this simple thing, but now it seems the Northerners feel the need to improve our marriage customs too.” She threw a pebble in the pond and watched it skitter away. Zuko waited patiently for an explanation.

“Betrothal necklaces are common to the Northern Tribe. I wear the one Gran Gran brought with her when she ran from the North. She gave it to mom and I inherited it after she passed away. Us Southerners are simple people. The couple approach the elders, there is some chanting and then the man cloaks the woman in pelts of the finest animal he’s managed to kill. Marriages are official only after the birth of the first child. But now we have the new and improved version: a subtle reminder that the woman belongs to the man every time she looks in her mirror, because it seems we are not cultured enough - Why are you looking at me like that?”

He spluttered, blushed and ran his hand through his hair nervously. “I’m sorry, I uh didn’t mean to creep you out or anything. I just enjoy listening to you go off passionately about these things, Tara.”

“You weren’t being creepy and… wait. What did you call me?”

“Um…Tara?” he blushed some more. “I thought friends did nicknames, uh forget it.” He mumbled. She just knew a big blustering apology was headed her way, so before he could start, she smiled widely and said, “I love it.” Zuko beamed back: definitely the largest smile she’d seen so far. “I’m glad.” His eyes shone gold in the dappled afternoon sunlight and for some unknown reason, she felt warmth across her cheeks. Finding that for once, she couldn’t hold his gaze, she looked away and plucked a firelilly to tuck behind her ear. A soft breeze ruffled her hair and it nearly fell out, but a warm hand righted it again, lingering perhaps half a beat too long against her skin. And so that afternoon passed too: just the two of them, feet dipped in the pond, sitting a little closer than was strictly appropriate.

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She could see Zuko’s figure getting steadily closer, standing tall, broad and stiff in his red robes and flowing cape. She hastily checked up on whether her kids remembered any of the etiquette they’d been taught in the last few days. They just feverishly nodded at her, eyes wide. When the ramp lowered, Katara was the first one off. She was personally still unsure what she’d say to him beyond the formal greeting. It had been so long since they’d written to each other and even longer since they’d met.

She walked up to within a few feet of him and bowed her head, hands folded in the traditional Fire Nation greeting. “Fire Lord Zuko. I sincerely thank you for welcoming us into your beautiful home and for coming all the way to greet us.”

He bowed back before stepping closer to clasp her forearm in the Water Tribe style. “The pleasure is all mine, Master Katara. I hope you had a good journey.” And oh, hearing those words, it was like a heavy weight off her chest. She had been so afraid that he’d refer to her as the Avatar’s Wife, that she’d have to awkwardly correct him in front of the gathered crowd and his Royal Guard. She still would have to tell him what happened, but at least now it wouldn’t be in front of an audience.

So she squeezed his forearm back and answered, “We did” before finally chancing a proper look at him. Her first thought was that he’d grown his hair out. Even with his topknot, it reached beyond his shoulders, sleek black tresses blowing in the evening breeze but he’d kept his face clean shaven so that his jawline looked sharp as ever. He looked good, he always had, but now he also looked serious- as though he rarely smiled, a face marked by harsh lines. Wondering if she could still see a trace of that bumbling 20 year old idiot she’d left behind, she looked into his eyes and found that they were the same. Even if all of him changed, she would recognise those eyes. Golden like the sunrise and currently assessing her the same way she was him. Then they flitted to her neck and appeared confused. She whispered, “Later” and Zuko gave an imperceptible nod before turning around to greet the children. 

They bowed to him and he bowed back, smiling wider than he had previously; which wasn’t really saying much. Turning to Kya, he crouched down and said, “That was a very impressive display of bending. I must thank you for not keeping me waiting too long.” Kya absolutely glowed and Katara’s heart seemed to expand in her chest. “Don’t encourage her,” she chided fondly. Breaking all decorum, Kya stuck her tongue out at her before turning back to Zuko and saying, “You’re welcome, Firelord Zuko.”

“No, no. Just Uncle Zuko please.” Looking at the boys on either side of her, both doing their best to stand stiff and straight, he said, “And I suppose this miniature Sokka is Bumi? I’ve heard you’re as good as him with a boomerang?” Bumi puffed up with pride and in a rare show of humility said, “Not yet.”

“You will be,” he said, patting him on his shoulder.  “And this is our newest airbender! Got any tricks for me?”

“Yes, Fire- I mean Uncle Zuko, if you want to see.” Tenzin looked down shyly, shuffling his feet.

“Go ahead then,” Zuko said, and Tenzin made a tiny ball of air in his hand with pieces of stone flying around. Distantly, she heard gasps and out of the corner of her eyes, she saw Kya rolling her eyes. Zuko smiled even wider and ruffled his hair. “That was amazing! Now if you will follow me? Master Katara, kids.”

Katara’ he'd said. Her smile flickered a little. 

“Of course, Fire Lord,” she replied stiffly, and this time it was his expression that wavered.

As expected there were palanquins ready to take them back, with curtains shielding them from view of the common people. Katara and her children were seated in the larger one while Zuko took the smaller yet clearly more embellished one. She definitely did not like this part, and her children, brought up in the Water Tribe way of community and hardship also looked uncomfortable with the fact that there were essentially people carrying them. So she took this opportunity to ensure they knew how things worked here: in the Palace and the Fire Nation as a whole; from the clear class hierarchy to the formalities expected of them. “I will instruct you as and when the situation arises, but be on your best for now. I don’t think Zuko would mind so much, but the nobility is uptight and mean.” Even as she said it, she realised that she wasn’t sure. She wondered how and why her friend had changed, and what, if anything that she knew about him still held true. How did people behave in these situations, when they met old friends that they hadn’t communicated with in years?

Peering through the curtains, they could see as the capital passed by, beautiful houses with red tiled slanting roofs, well-maintained gardens, men and women in flowing robes all stopping to stare at the royal procession, trying to get a glimpse of their ruler. The splendour slowly increased the closer they got to the palace. Soon, the main gate and grounds came into view and beyond that, steps leading up to the real building. They were carried up these too, and then a couple more gates, finally disembarking in front of the palace entrance. To Katara, it looked like nothing had changed since she was last here: lit sconces providing more than enough light to appreciate the majestic red structure looming above them with its wide sweeping roof, supported by columns which had golden stone dragons coiled around them, and the wide tiled courtyard and small army of servants and guards. So though she herself gave no response, she heard three very audible gasps behind her. Yes, that would be her reaction too, seeing this place for the first time. Such as it was, that had happened after the Agni Kai and it was safe to say that she had been in no mood to appreciate architecture at that point.

At the forefront was a thin old man and a young girl standing demurely in pretty pink robes and wearing what were they called? Yes spectacles. Won’t do to forget that word. As the party approached, she could just feel her children scrutinising the child, who looked on inquisitively. Zuko strode on ahead with Katara slightly behind him, back straight, hands by her sides carefully avoiding the sweep of his cape. As they approached, the man bowed. “A very good evening to you, Firelord Zuko.” Zuko nodded at him. Then turning to Katara, he said “My lady, it is our great honour to welcome the Avatar’s Wife into the Fire Nation, my name is …” And the rest of his words were lost to her.

You are my forever girl.

No. Stop it. Focus.

Digging her nails into her hands, she forced herself back to the present, and realized that Zuko was speaking in a tone that she hadn’t heard before. He sounded… intimidating. “Minister, you are talking to one of the greatest waterbenders ever and a gifted healer, I would advise you to refer to her as such, at risk of insulting her and her bending prowess.”

The old man looked terrified for a moment. “Of course my Lord, I extend my sincerest apologies, Master Katara.”

She forced a smile onto her face, “Thank you for the lovely welcome and for correcting yourself. I would indeed prefer Master Katara.”  

“This is Minister Yoshida. He is in charge of the Palace and Caldera City. And this,” he said with a clear softening of voice, beckoning the girl forward, “Is Izumi, my daughter. She is ten years old. Izumi, this is my old friend Katara and her kids: Bumi, Kya and Tenzin. Kya is your age, Bumi is 12 and Tenzin is 8. Show them around the Palace. I hope you all will get along well.”

Taking this as his queue, Bumi cracked a toothy smile and moved forward, hand extended.

Kya hissed, “No Bumi, come back!” but now it was too late. Izumi looked confused and Minister Yoshida’s eyebrows had lifted off his forehead. After a beat, where Bumi’s smile wavered, his hand still extended, and then Zuko moved forward.

“See he’s shaking hands with you, it’s a gesture of friendship. You grip his hand back like this,” Zuko demonstrated. He let go and Izumi tried it, a little hesitantly at first before squeezing back. Happy that she had mastered something new, she smiled up at them brightly and said, “It is wonderful to have you all here!” 

Minister Yoshida then introduced her to Aki, her lady in waiting, who would take care of all her needs. Knowing how fruitless it was to refuse and argue, Katara simply nodded. They all then went inside, where she gave the gifts she’d brought with her and parted in the entrance hallway with a promise to meet for dinner in some time.

Through red columns and hallways lined by paintings they went. Though she remembered the place vaguely, she would have to learn the passages again or risk getting hopelessly lost. It helped that the layout was more or less the same so she had a good idea where they were and she smiled to herself as she passed the Ugly Fire Sage. It did not help that everything was red and gold. The guest chambers still had the painting of the woman in gold robes outside it but the interiors had been slightly changed. Their rooms (all ridiculously large and well furnished) actually had blue elements in them. The curtains and sheets were blue with waves painted on the folding partitions.

“Mom, I don’t want to EVER leave!” Bumi yelled flinging himself on the large bed. Next Kya jumped on it and they began bouncing up and down, trying to convince Tenzin to airbend them higher with every jump. “This place is amazing!!” Kya squealed.

“Please don’t break the bed.” Despite herself, Katara started grinning. “But yeah it kind of is, isn’t it?”

They made it just in time for dinner in the Fire Lord’s personal chambers and would have a hundred percent gotten lost had it not been for Aki. Katara tried to memorise the directions from the tapestries: left from the rooster-eagle, right from the bald fat man and so on. She’d need to work on it.

Dinner itself was a strange affair. Zuko asked them about their journey, about their training, about how they liked their accommodation. Kya and Bumi burst out with very effusive answers and they kept the conversation going. They LOVED their rooms, the journey was a bit dull, and Kya and Tenzin were well on their way to become masters.

Zuko was good with kids. Huh. Who knew.

Izumi was quiet for the most part except when Katara asked her about her studies. She went on for quite a while about that topic. “The scholar in the family,” her father said affectionately. She blushed and proceeded to tell him all about her grades in the recent history exam. “I lost a mark there because they misspelled Fire Lord Atsuki, and wrote Atsuji instead, which is totally unfair, don’t you think so, Dad? And when I pointed it out, she called me a snoot! Can you imagine?! ” her righteous anger suddenly gave way to embarrassment when she realized she had forgotten some five rules of table manners somewhere in this conversation. Not that anyone at the table actually cared.

Kya asked her, “She sounds like a horrible person. Why didn’t you just burn the paper? It would have sent a strong message.”

“Kya!” Katara cried exasperatedly.The girl in question just shrugged.

“Um, I’m not a bender,” Izumi said, suddenly fidgeting with her sleeves. “But I have my knives. Just like Mom” And a wistful smile appeared on her face. “Oh and Aunty Ty is also teaching me chi-blocking! She’s really cool!”  

There was a beat of silence across the table, and then, “You’re a non-bender too?” Bumi asked in wonder.

“Yep” she replied, and Bumi's eyes flickering to Zuko who had the most adoring smile on his face. It was quite something, to see those austere lines soften drastically “She’s fantastic. She can beat most benders her age,” Zuko said.

 “You’re embarrassing me, Dad!” his daughter squeaked out, hiding her face behind her hands. After this exchange, Bumi was silent through what was left of dinner.

At the end of it, Katara spoke up, “Zuko? A word?” He nodded and led her towards his private tea parlour as the children were shepherded to their rooms. He pushed open the ornate door, and déjà vu hit her full in the face. The last time she was here alone with him was the time she’d brought up her problems with Aang and now more than a decade later, she would discuss their divorce. The irony was not lost on her. She gravitated towards the seat she’d taken then and same as before, Zuko took his after making them both a pot of tea. Facing her in all seriousness, he said, “I’m all ears.”

And oh, how she wished she could recognise that face, that rigid tone of voice, how she wished that she could still call him a friend. Why exactly hadn’t they kept in touch? She wanted to believe this was the same troubled boy with the scar but it felt like too much had changed in the last 13 years. He had changed and so had she. Still, she prepared herself. He had accepted Sokka’s plea after all, no questions asked; the least he deserved was an explanation.

“So… you probably noticed the necklace”

“Hm? Oh, oh yes. It’s your mother’s isn’t it? What happened to-” and it must’ve been at this point that he noticed her downcast expression because he stopped himself and said, “You don’t have to explain anything that you don’t want to.”

“No, no it’s okay. It has to be said. I gave Aang back the necklace he gave me when I broke up with him. The tribe knows and I wrote to Toph but no one else yet.”

“I … had no idea. When did it happen?” Zuko asked in a quiet voice, and she could not read the expression he had on in that moment.

“Around two months ago,” she replied.

“I’m so sorry. I never imagined that you two of all people would divorce.” Again, she could not make out his expression.

“Me neither.” She said, waiting for him to ask the next big question: why. But he never did. He looked a little pained now, but stayed silent. So she continued, “I know it’s a common concept here and in the Earth Kingdom, but back home, marriages are sacred. I may be the first one in … Tui knows how long." She paused for a bit, collecting her thoughts. "It’s such an ugly word. Divorce that is. That too from the Avatar. Suffice to say I am no one’s favourite back home.” She barked out a humourless laugh. “I decided to get away for a while when it all got to be too much. It started affecting the children, and I couldn’t let that happen. So here I am now, trespassing on your hospitality.” She could feel the tears coming and hid her face behind a long sip of tea that burned her mouth. She coughed some out of her nostrils and spluttered, “That’s some good tea.”

“Thanks. I have improved over the years. Uncle actually likes it now. Also, you can stay here for as long as you want. Trespass away. Even if people found out, no one will judge you here. As you said, separation and divorce are common here: and they can be initiated by either parties. Honestly, after all these years, some of your tribe’s customs still confuse me.”

She smile wanly, “Me too. There has been an improvement, but we have a long way to go. Also, why doesn't Izumi know how to greet people from the tribes? She’ll need to know how to greet dignitaries at the very least.”

“Yes, yes," he replied. "They'll be taught all that in the next school year. She has enough of our own etiquette to master before we go there. The most boring things but apparently necessary if she’s to be taken seriously as a ruler.”

There was a short silence wherein both of them just sipped tea. She searched for conversation topics when she remembered, “I got you something.”

He just raised his good brow quizzically. “You already gave me quite a few somethings.”

“Not that, silly. This is for you.” And she brought out the fireflakes packet from her bag.

“You remembered!” and for the first time since her return he smiled at her: truly smiled, eyes sparkling with mirth. How could she forget the days at the beach house when he finished off packet after packet as a ‘light snack’.

“Of course,” she smiled.

And then he proceeded to eat them by the handfuls in between sips of tea.

“Gross. Where are your manners, your majesty?” she asked, but she was beaming too now. There he was, she could recognise this boy. But even as he ate, she found herself floundering for more common topics.

“The weather is lovely, though I was expecting more cherry blossom this time.”

“They bloom for around a week a year- a little unpredictable. You just missed the season.”

What else could one say about the weather? Alright, then about the journey here: “You asked about our journey didn’t you? It was a bit more eventful than the kids would have you believe. Bumi got drunk with the sailors once, Tenzin nearly sneezed himself off the ship thrice and I’ve lost count of the number of times Kya has hit one or both of them in the face with ice or water, mostly just because she could.”

“That sounds… eventful.”

“Kept me on my toes throughout. Also, thanks for coming all the way to pick us up!"

"Ahh, it was nothing. The captain had orders to send a hawk when you reached the Black Cliffs," he said flippantly. 

"Well thanks anyway. Enough about me, how have you been?” she tried again.

“Me? Same old, same old,” he said, looking away. 

But what was same old? She didn’t have much of an idea what went on in his life, so she latched on to the one thing that she did know. “So you still sneak out?”

“I’m old now Katara. I have a daughter. It’s been 13 years,” he said, sounding tired. And it crept on her again, the sadness. She wanted to talk about all that had happened in the last few years, about why there had been no communication between them, but before she could even broach the subject, he said, ”I have back to back meetings tomorrow. I’m afraid, I must turn in now. Good night, Katara.”

Katara. Again. 

“Good night Zuko.”

Notes:

Yes, that was a Chandler quote I snuck in there. As for Zuko, if you've seen Favlie's Long Haired Zuko art anywhere, I'm using that as inspiration (because it's amazing). Also, I feel he would be great with kids: he was good with Lee, the Earth Kindom boy, Kiyi his 8yr old step-sister in the comics, and A+ dadko in gaang shenanigans. Also, I know Sandalwood is an Indian thing, not Imperial Japan, but forgive this brown author for absolutely loving the smell of it. If you want to chat with me, I'm on Tumblr! @that-turtleduck
PS: about the Kataang dynamic- I don't think either of them is a bad person, they're just bad for each other: where K is always protective of A, always goes along with his ideas and never actively confronts him about the things which upset her and he doesn't understand or challenge her and is always made to believe he's infallible. I really hope I'm putting my point across.

Chapter 5: Making Friends

Notes:

I'll be honest, not super duper pleased with this one, idk why. But I'm tired of being stuck on the same chapter, so here we go :)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Their meetings continued. There was a sense of peace and security to them now. She let her guard down and talked to him about absolutely anything that had crossed her mind that day. The spicy food, the people she met- friendly or hostile, the latest baby duckling. He must have felt the same because one evening he accidentally let slip that he’d learnt to play the Tsungi Horn as part of his royal education. Which was a mistake on his part because there was no way she was dropping that topic. He still hadn’t told her where he went at night, but she hoped that he would one day.

“Tara, let it go” he pleaded with her the third day after the slip up.

“Nope.”

“Tara, please.”

“Tell me if I have ever in my life ‘let go’ of anything.”

“Well, what about the Aang stuff-“

“No, not that! That’s another matter!”

“If you say so,” he replied carefully.

And that got to her for some reason. She just looked away, staring into the mid distance quietly and he seemed to understand that he’d crossed a line.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry," he said.

She just pouted some more and turned farther away. He sighed. “Will you forgive me if I promise to play it for you tomorrow?” At this, she looked back and smiled at him.

True to his word, he’d gotten the Tsungi Horn and played Four Seasons to an audience of Katara and the turtleducks. It was the most beautiful thing she’d heard. She said so and requested an encore. He ended up playing the same song six times in the end, after which she presented him with a bunch of firelillies as a gift.

“You plucked these from my own gardens in front of my eyes!” He laughed, but accepted them. It was a singularly lovely sound and made her stomach flutter. A feeling she steadfastly ignored.

One evening, after an especially ugly fight with Mai, he sat and told her their shared history of ons and offs. “She’s the perfect choice for me, really. She's known me since childhood, we’ve been together for a while now, she’s a Fire Nation noblewoman.” Katara agreed. Mai with her cool attitude, intelligence, family connections and regal appearance was born for the post of Fire Lady. “Then why do we fight so much? Why do I always have to walk on eggshells around her? This is the way forward. I know it is. Then why do I still feel uneasy?” All she could do was hold him and try to smooth away his doubts. She herself had only the experience of a single relationship. But he wasn’t looking for advice. He just needed someone who’d listen and not consistently talk in proverbs. At one point, in true Zuko fashion, he apologised for talking too much, for ‘making it all about him’.

“Oh, hush Zuko. I want to listen, I want to help. I’m here for you willingly.” He still looked unsure, but after observing her expression for a while, he nodded.

“Thank you. That means a lot to me. I’m here for you too, Tara, if you should ever need me.  Now and always.”

He never called her Katara anymore, it was always Tara and she’d gotten used to it. On one such evening, he told her that Mai had found out about their “‘clandestine meetings’ quote unquote”. Katara didn’t ask why he hadn’t just told her about them himself. After all, she hadn't told Aang either. Zuko said that Mai hadn’t been pleased and they’d fought again. He didn’t come by to see her the next two days. He was back on the third. They didn’t discuss it again.

Sokka asked her where she disappeared during a dinner when they were all sitting together and she just said she liked going for walks. To help with her digestion of course. Toph snorted next to her and chimed in, “Perhaps you should cut back on all the Fire Nation spice. You too, Sparky.”

A ang had wanted to accompany her, but Katara requested ‘me’ time.

“Sure you want your friend around for your ‘me time’ Tara?”  Zuko joked that evening. She swatted his arm and watched as his eyes glowed in the moonlight, an easy smile on his face.

 When she finally found her way to her room later that evening, a shadow called out “Hello” to her.

Katara yelped and jumped four feet back before realising who it was. “You scared me half to death, Toph what are you doing here? At least put on some lights!”

“See, the thing about being blind, Sugarqueen, is that I don’t really care if a room is lit or not. The more important question is, what are you doing?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Katara replied, nose in the air. It was a futile attempt and she knew it.

“I think you do. Your heartbeat is through the roof. I can feel it all the way from here," the other girl said.

"If you’re talking about me spending time with Zuko, we’re just friends. Nothing more.”

“Then you won’t mind me tagging along the next time, I’m sure.” Katara found that she had nothing to say to her, because of course she minded- it was her and Zuko’s time, after all, and she intended to keep it that way.

“I stopped your boyfriend from following you today, just saying,” Toph said casually. This shook Katara, but the other girl just looked bored. Having apparently said her bit and lost interest, she got up to leave.

“Toph, you have the wrong idea” Katara said with a shaky laugh “I don’t know what you think is happening but-“

“What I think is there’s going to be drama.” Toph’s words were cutting, but rang true. “Which sounds fun, honestly, but I don’t want to see my friends get hurt. I don’t know what’s going on with you, but figure out your shit quickly.”  There was no sleep for her that night.

A few days later, there was a dance in honour of the royal couple, organised by Iroh, and going absolutely against Zuko’s express wishes. The whole thing was part of Iroh and Aang’s idea to ‘bring culture and dance back into the Fire Nation after a century of oppression’. Worded like that, Zuko had had no choice but to go along with the scheme and Iroh went all out. Katara thought his apprehension was because he was a poor dancer, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. He brought the same grace and refinement into dancing that he did in firebending. It was hypnotic to watch. He and Mai cut an awe-inspiring figure, swathed in their robes of crimson and gold, turning in time with the music, and she saw more than a few nobles nodding in approval. Aang grabbed her hand and suddenly they were dancing as well. Theirs wasn’t the formal stiff dance of the Fire Nation nobility, but he was a performer at heart, and both of them were master benders, able to captivate their audience easily. More couples joined in and distantly she could see Sokka and Suki twirling away as fast as possible. She shared a smile with Ty Lee as she pulled a very grumpy Toph along.

 Katara thought she was enjoying herself, the attention and the fast pace of the music, her head spinning. After a bit, the music changed and she found that she could recognise this tune: it was Four Seasons, slow and melodic. On some impulse, she looked up beyond Aang’s shoulder – and somehow straight into Zuko’s eyes. They held hers as they both continued dancing with their respective partners and for a moment she felt suspended in time. Everything else melted away and it was just the two of them in the room. He had on a look: strange yet familiar, sad yet hopeful, full of some meaning which she was yet to grasp but it gave her the irrational urge of setting everything aside and stepping into his arms. She wanted to smooth away the melancholy in his features, she wanted to drag him away from this stuffy room, she wanted to sniff the strong, heady smell of him, she wanted... The music changed, Aang twirled her away and the spell broke.

After some time, they changed partners and she did her fair bit of socialising before fleeing to a balcony for a respite from the endless line of nobles wanting to dance with her and her own swirling thoughts: only to find it occupied.

“This is my hiding spot. Find your own”, he grumped at her.

“You are the HOST, Zuko!” she chided.

“And?” he asked, tipping his chin forward.

“People are searching for you.” She couldn’t believe that she had to point this out.

“So? I’m fairly certain people are searching for you too right now.”

“I’m not leaving.”

“Well neither am I.”

She fumed silently for a while before he held out his hand. She looked at it and then him, a little shocked. “I’ll go back only if you do.” A dance with Zuko? She would be lying if she said that she hadn’t thought about it before. Truth be told, she had given it far more thought than necessary.

Stepping closer, she pointed out, “That’s unfair. I only just got here. What makes you think I’d want to dance with you?” She pretended to think a little, just to watch him get flustered and try to withdraw his hand. But before he could start bumbling again, she leaned towards him and continued with a smirk, “But I will if you ask nicely.”

He smiled shyly, pulling out a Fire Lily to offer to her and leaned further in, such that she could feel his warm breath tickling her face. Clearly relieved and raking his free hand through his hair, he asked in a voice of melted honey, “Tara, Princess of the Southern Water Tribe, may I have the honour of the next dance?”

Carefully accepting the flower, she blushed and placed her hand in his, when suddenly a high pitched voice squeaked out, “Tara-?”

There stood Aang. He looked confused. He looked furious. She had not noticed him approach them. “What is going on here?”

“Nothing!” Both of them said simultaneously. And oh, she realised what this must look like so she pulled her hand away from Zuko’s at the same time that he shifted away. Aang for his part did not look like he believed them at all. If anything, he looked angrier than before, almost as angry as when - and the sudden visual of him going in his Avatar state then and there popped in her mind.

“Sweetie, there’s nothing going on between us, I just came out for some fresh air. I think I’d like to go on Appa. This place is stifling. So let’s do that?” It didn’t look like he’d heard her because he just stood there, glaring at Zuko, eyes wild as the storm, clothes fluttering in a breeze that only seemed to affect him, “You are going to be married in a week! How could you?!” Zuko refused to take the bait, because he did not respond. This only seemed to infuriate Aang more, “She is MY girlfriend. Do you have no honour?”

This seemed to be enough to rile Zuko up, evident by the flare of the sconces around them and he gritted out, “I have done nothing wrong. You are clearly imagining things. Calm down, Avatar”

“I’m the one imagining things?-”

Katara grabbed Aang’s hand. “Come on sweetie, let’s go. Let’s talk elsewhere. We don’t want a scene, do we?” Still he refused to budge. Placing one hand on his cheek she asked softly, “Please? For me?” This apparently worked as he diverted his attention to her and she managed to pull him away. Once they were mid-air on Appa, he burst out, “What exactly is happening between the two of you?”

 “Nothing, Aang. We’re just friends.”

“Sure you are! Is that what you talk about on your nightly moonlit strolls? Your friendship?” And she startled, mouth falling open.

“Don’t deny it! I saw you two!”

“We’ve just got into the habit of meeting up and talking. That’s all.”

“That’s all? You spar together every morning and, you don’t even invite the rest of us. He has a nickname just for you AND the two of you meet up at night?” She stayed silent, there was really no reply to this that she’d not given already. She was just glad that he didn’t know about their afternoons.

After a while, he continued in a monotone, “We’ll be leaving the capital the day after the wedding. We’ll visit the neighbouring villages before that conference in… Katara are you listening to me?”

She snapped back, “Yes, I’m listening. Aang, we’ve been over this. You can’t decide for both of us. I want to stay here for now.”

“Of course you want to stay here with Zuko.”

“It’s not that! I just don’t feel like travelling for now. As I explained before,” she said, crossing her arms in front of her.

“What do you plan on doing once he’s married?”

“We’re just good friends, Aang.” She said, suddenly tired. “It has been nice catching up with him. This has nothing to do with his marriage.”

“We’re destined for each other, Katara, I’ve always known that. We were friends for a long time before you even tolerated Zuko. I mean, remember how you hated him so much, you wouldn’t even talk to him. I don’t know what changed-”

“THERE IS NOTHING GOING ON BETWEEN THE TWO OF US.”

This seemed to alarm him. She rarely yelled at him. There was a reason why everyone envied their relationship: they hardly, if ever fought. This was their biggest argument to date and she was not liking it.

“I mean it, Aang. Promise.” She said more calmly. This seemed to relieve him somewhat.

There was silence for a while and she looked at the moon, praying to Yue for strength. He broke it first when he asked, “So why aren’t you coming?”

“I just said that I don’t want to travel again for a while.”

“But that’s what being a nomad is," he said confusedly.

 “I’m not an air nomad, Aang.” Why wasn’t he getting it? “But you will be -” and he clapped his hands to his mouth.

Oh.

“I didn’t mean for it to come out this way!” he groaned. “I prepared a whole speech. Okay, let's redo this.”

Was this happening? Right now? Apparently it was.

“You were the first person I saw when I opened my eyes and I have loved you since then. You have been there for me through everything so far. You’re the most kind and caring person I know. You are perfect,” he said, sincerity etched in his face. “And we are perfect together. We’re both powerful benders, we have each other’s backs, we never fight and you completely understand me, support me and look after me, we’re destined to be together. You’re the only one who can calm me down, heh. I love you, sweetie, and I want many more adventures with you.”

“Katara, will you marry me and live life by my side?” he asked her, finally holding up a beautiful yellow necklace with a wooden pendant complete with a carving of the symbols of air and water. His grey eyes sparkled, the wind whistled through the air and their clothes fluttered.

Powerful bender. Aunt Wu’s prediction rang in her mind. Memories of the last four years floated by. Yes, he was right. This was her destiny.

She accepted. The yellow band took the place of the blue.

They announced it as soon as they met up with everyone else. Aang was ecstatic. He immediately began introducing her to everyone he met as his wife. That night there was much celebration. Zuko opened the doors to his cellar and the wine flowed. She laughed, she danced. Her fiancé never let go of her for too long. She had everything she had ever wanted. It was the happiest night of her life yet...

She managed to excuse herself after some time. Not that anyone would miss her, they were all wasted at that point. Without realising it, her feet brought her to the fountain. Everything that had happened in the last few hours rushed at her and suddenly it all felt like too much. The world was closing in around her, the cicadas were getting louder, the air colder and was someone calling her name-

 “Katara. KATARA!”

“Huh?”

“I said congratulations.” Zuko had found her. Standing in front of her, he was smiling, yet he wasn’t. She’d seen him truly smile and this wasn’t it. The molten gold of his eyes wasn’t shining at her.

“Are you happy?” He asked when she failed to answer him yet again.

“Are you?” she asked him in turn.

“Katara-”

“Don’t call me that. Please. Call me the other one.”

“Tara.” It looked like he was going to say something, but he stopped himself. Finally he said, “Do you want me to leave? Or is it your ‘me time’?” That brought a smile to her lips.

“Stay.” And so he did. That was the first night they spent almost completely in silence.

The Sakura bloomed and the gardens and the Fire Nation as a whole became stunningly beautiful. Zuko always found the time to spar with her and stick to their schedule, but it felt like a curtain had fallen between them. She could still see him, but it was different now. They didn’t talk as freely and most of their meetings were shrouded in silence. She felt strangely hollow. Once or twice she caught him looking at her when he thought she wasn’t paying attention. She always was.  

The wedding day arrived and brought with it more confusion than Katara could handle. On the day an entire country celebrated, her own friend’s wedding in fact, she felt… lost.  Sokka was still recovering from the hangover of their Men’s Night the day prior with Suki helping him, so she couldn’t really consult either of them. Perhaps sensing her discomfiture, her handsome husband-to-be made a point of staying next to her and kissing her. She smiled up at him. That smile never left her face as one by one strangers congratulated her on her engagement. Surprisingly, it was General Iroh who looked a tad upset. At some point in the proceedings, Toph made her way next to her and squeezed her hand.

The ceremony finally ended and Mai was crowned Fire Lady. The crown suited her.

As soon as she was done paying her dues, Katara left the premises. She had to pack for the next day, after all. On her way back she ran into Zuko who was predictably running away too. “I see that your soul did not in fact get sucked out,” she remarked. He smiled the same smile he’d had on all morning. “Appearances can be deceiving.” Yes, she knew that very well. Still, she had to keep up hers, so in a valiant effort at normalcy, she commented, “Well you look very handsome. She’s a lucky woman.”

“Thank you. You look beautiful in red," he said, and it was her turn to smile before remembering what she was supposed to tell him.

“We’ll be leaving tomorrow morning,” she said tonelessly, looking away.

He just bowed his head.

“I may not be able to see you off,” he replied in the same manner.

She could feel something plummet deep inside her. “I- I suppose this is farewell then. I'll write to you. Goodbye Zuko.”

“Goodbye Tara. Visit soon.”

And as she turned around, she thought that she would remember him like this. Standing tall in that corridor, wearing resplendent wedding robes lined by gold thread, top knot spilling out some strands, angular face set and expressionless. But his eyes. He’d never managed to keep the emotion from his eyes. They always gave away the lie and right now, they looked like bottomless pools in whose depths thrived something nameless. 

 It was the last time they’d see each other for years. 

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“Mom, where’s Izumi?” Kya’s voice pulled her out of her thoughts.

“Hm? Oh, in her lessons, my star,” Katara answered distractedly. They were sitting in the veranda of the largely empty guest wing, enjoying the cool evening air as Tenzin practiced his forms nearby.

“All day?!” Kya asked-  for Kya, her waterbending lessons happened at night for a few hours, and school in the tribes was only for a couple of hours in the morning.

“Well they are sort of particular here about the stuff their kids must know, and she is the princess. She has extra lessons. Why don’t you ask her during dinner?” Katara replied. 

“Why is that the only time that we see her? Or Uncle Zuko? He seems pretty cool but how’s he always working?” Bumi asked. “I mean Uncle Sokka and Gramps are our leaders but we see them all the time!”

“The Fire Nation is much bigger and more developed than our tribe, my wolf pup. Zuko is a very busy man.” Katara could make his excuses for him, but the truth was that they’d been there for more than a week now and she only saw him during dinners and that too when he didn’t choose to have it next to his paperwork. 

“Bumi, let’s ask Izumi tonight. This place is great but I’m getting bored,” Kya complained, drawling out the last bit. “There has to be something more to do!” Well, it was time, Katara had honestly thought she’d be having this discussion sooner. She had been enjoying herself so far, but the restlessness had begun and she wondered how long it would be before she put them all on the first ship back home. It wasn’t like she’d expected to stay longer than a couple of weeks.

“Tenny come here” Kya commanded. Tenzin leapt and landed gracefully on the table in the middle of all the food.  “We need you to pull the snow puppy face for us when we tell you to.”

“Cool! Who are we using it on?” Tenzin asked.

Just at that moment, Katara was called by the Palace Cook to discuss food and cuisine, but she hoped her little monsters had the sense not to embarrass her.

That night at dinner, Bumi brought up the topic. “Say, Uncle Zuko, you’re a busy man aren’t you?”

Zuko seemed to have had enough years of fatherhood thrust on him to smell something fishy. “Mhmm,” He said, non-committal. “And Izumi too?” Kya asked, innocently and he told them what their mom already had. “Well kiddo, Izumi has school and her lessons.”

“It’s just that we’ve been here for a week and we never see you or her,” Kya pouted.

“Yeah, Uncle Zuko, even Tenzin is getting bored, aren’t you, Tenny?” Bumi asked and on cue, Tenzin pulled out his snow puppy face. Bringing up the rear, Kya asked innocently, “Is the Fire Nation this boring? Mom always has such fun stories to tell about you and the country?”

Tenzin asked shyly, “Are you boring, Uncle Zuko?”

“Yeah, Uncle Zuko what do we do all day?” Bumi continued. “I don’t want to tell everyone how dull everything was but…”

 Katara had let it get so far out of sheer dismay but found that she absolutely could not deal with this train-wreck of a conversation anymore. Dropping her chopsticks, she hid her face in her hands for a moment in shame. Then removing them she said, “Zuko, I’m so, so sorry. Please excuse these tiny heathens. KIDS-” She said, turning to them “ROOM. NOW. MOVE.” And she made to get up, pulling water from the cups to form extensions to her arms to further emphasize her anger. Her children paled immediately, seeming to realise that they had messed up.

But the tension of the moment was undercut with Izumi whispering loudly, “WHOA! SO COOL,” and then immediately clapping her hands on her mouth.

In the silence that ensued, Zuko actually chuckled. “Emotional blackmail at the dinner table out of the blue? This reminds me of Uncle. I think I’ll send him a hawk tonight. He loves to dote on kids, after all. Katara, please sit down, I’m not offended at all.” And he had the nerve to laugh some more.

“Zuko!” She hissed, “You can’t be serious.”

“What?! I’ve been called “Prince Pouty”, “Jerkbender”, “Sparky”, “Angry Jerk” and many, many other things over the years, most of them by Sokka or my crew, which I can’t repeat right now. What’s one more?” He put his hands behind his head and leaned back, evaluating the children. “You have my attention, what are your demands?” Katara released a loud sigh and put the water back while everyone in the room below 5 feet of height relaxed.

Kya started, “We want to explore the Palace, the Caldera and everything else that we can see while we’re here.”

Bumi continued, “We want to spend more time with you and Izumi.”

Tenzin took up the pace, “I wanna learn firebending!”

There was a moment’s silence at this proclamation. Then Kya and Bumi spoke together, chiming in with, “We want to go shopping and wear those pretty dresses” and “I heard you have a dragon? I want to ride it. I mean, we want to ride it.”

“That’s enough.” Katara glared at them and they shut up.

“And what will I get in return”, Zuko asked, still clearly amused.

“Our eternal love, gratitude and devotion.” Bumi counted off on three of his fingers.

“Okay, that’s fair.” Zuko said thoughtfully, rubbing his chin, “How about the three of you join Izumi in school? She goes to the Royal Academy. You might like it there. Your dad certainly loved the one he attended. You’ll make more friends and there are field trips every two weeks. You’ll also get to spend more time with her and you’ll get to see firebending and incorporate it in your bending if you want to,” Zuko said pointedly to Tenzin. “Also, it is a complete no on the dragon. Don’t even think about it. You can go and shop and look around the Caldera whenever you want, just tell Aki, but honestly, I’d wait for Uncle Iroh if I were you. He knows all the best spots even though he barely lives here anymore. You can come to my office at any time, with anything, but I’d prefer it if you didn’t seek me out between breakfast and lunch because that’s when all my bigger meetings happen. Will that be all?” he asked, eyes twinkling, a slight smile on his face.

All three of them and Katara gaped at him. She managed to gather her wits and said weakly, “Well what do you say, kids?” All three of them gave dazed nods.

“That’s settled then,” Zuko said with finality. And she noticed him giving her the most smug look she’d seen. Before she could comment however, Bumi loudly interjected, “Let’s spit on it, Uncle Zuko!” and Zuko actively winced. Turning to Katara, he said, “Your brother is disgusting. Tell him I said that.” But he left his seat and completed the whole ritual as asked.

After dinner was done, Katara tried to signal Zuko that she wanted to talk for a while, but he seemed oblivious to all her efforts. This wounded her pride and she gave up. That night was a full moon yet again, so instead of following after him, she took that opportunity to train Kya in the fountain outside their quarters. The girl tired after some time and Katara decided to take a walk by herself through the gardens. With cicadas screeching in the background and the moonlight painting everything in shades of silver and black, she swept through carefully tended lawns, feeling the power thrumming through her. The moon was at her back and her element was calling to her, and she felt limitless, as though she were walking through a kingdom of her own. Somehow, by some subconscious memory, her feet ended up taking her to a derelict fountain at the very edge of the inner gardens.

She recognised this place. It had not been tended for a while, she knew not why, but she’d recognise it anywhere.

“Are you happy?”

“Are you?”

She cleaned away some vines and sat on the ledge of the fountain drinking in the crisp night air and indulging in some of her fondest memories. One particular face featured prominently, and she got so lost in her thoughts that she nearly missed the slight rustle next to her. As it was, her battle hardened reflexes hadn’t completely lost their polish and she was ready with a sphere of water in one hand when the voice in the shadows sighed out, “It’s only me, Katara. Who else.”

“Zuko! What are you- But you said-” and then his words from a week ago registered as she exclaimed, “You lied to me! You did!”

Stepping out of the shadows, once again in black clothes, his bag slung over his shoulder and hair tied up, he said, “I didn’t really lie. I just evaded your real question. You always were after me to improve my poker face after all. You should be proud.”

Her brows drew together even as a sad smile made its way to her face, “I was after you, wasn’t I. Good for you, then. Managed to finally fool me.”

Zuko just stared at her quietly. Then nodded and made to leave and she knew that she couldn’t just let him go. “Wait. Stay with me. Let’s talk.” He looked confused, but took a seat by her side anyway. 

There was silence for a while, then he said, “Reminds me of when we were young.”

“Yes, it does,” she said. Some more silence. “It was impressive what you did today, tricked them all into attending school.”

“Well, it was the best option. I had given this some thought previously, you know. Babysitting Kiyi taught me early on how short children’s attention spans are. Speaking of which, I don’t think there was any point in my life when I was anything less than a complete and absolute bore. I can’t believe you actually called me fun?” he asked in disbelief.

“That’s because you were! And um, probably still are? Anyway, I was never bored around you.” She said firmly. At this he gave her a wan smile, “Don’t you think that’s because we were fighting for quite a lot of the time that we actually spent together?”

“That was such a long time ago. 17 years now. We’ve had some peaceful times too. More than enough to cancel out all the rest of it. You’ve grown old,” she said, pulling at his soft, straight hair “It suits you.”

“Thanks,” he said, offering her a shy smile. “You don’t look like you’ve aged a day, Katara.”

“Looks like someone has been taking Uncle Iroh’s tips on wooing older ladies,” she said with a chuckle, which made him sputter and Katara laugh louder. When the last of it faded away, she finally said what had been on her mind a long time, “I’ve missed this.” Her words were impossibly loud and heavy, in the otherwise quiet night air.

“Me too.”

“How did we lose contact? It feels like ages since we last exchanged letters.”

This statement was met with silence. A heavily pregnant pause and the awkwardness which had been dispelled for some time returned. Somewhere, a bat-eagle screeched.  “How indeed, Katara.”

This made her pause. What did he mean by that.

“It’s late now, let’s talk later? What I said to them also applies to you. You can trouble me anytime you want,” and with that, he got up to go, stretching as he did. He made it two steps away, when she asked, “I can trouble you anytime, but just not right now?”

“I’m sorry?” he asked, turning around to face her, nose scrunched.

“Nevermind.” She looked away from him, heart growing heavier by the second.

“Katara…” and then he shook his head. Whatever it was that was on the tip of his tongue, disappearing. “Maybe some other time.” And without further ado, he left. In the resounding silence that ensued, she swore she heard a 20 year old boy say to his friend,

 “I’m here for you, Tara, now and always.”

She wasn’t sure if the voice made her feel more lonely or less. She just knew that she wanted that boy in her life again, by hook or by crook.

School began with the start of next week. Katara had to hand it to Zuko, he’d thought of a solution that would be good for the children and would keep them out of their hair for some time. The idea was very cleverly hyped too, so that they’d look forward to it. Izumi tried to help with this perception, of course, by gushing about her studies but this seemed to have the opposite effect.

The first day, all three of them came back in high spirits. Bumi would not stop talking about the number of people he’d met. There was some talk of a dance party which Katara pretended not to hear. Kya and Izumi were in one class and returned as thick as thieves. There was much giggling and whispering which continued throughout dinner. She only raised an eyebrow at Zuko who shrugged back. Tenzin meanwhile, was all praises about a Jiao who taught him pottery in the crafts class. No one at school knew who they really were and everyone was under strict orders to keep all bending under wraps for security purposes.

The next two weeks passed similarly. Even as the initial excitement dimmed, they didn’t tire of going nearly every day and almost always returned with wild stories. Katara supposed she had Aang to thank for that part, if such things were genetic. Bumi had already been given detention once in that period for disrupting class with fart noises. Even reticent Izumi was included in these adventures and she could tell that Zuko was very pleased. Katara was too. It seemed like the change had done them all a lot of good and she herself took the opportunity to read up in the Palace Library all that her children were learning at school, so that she too could contribute to the conversation at the dinner table. Soon enough though, she realised that sitting in a comfortable chair with a pot of tea before her, learning new things was a decent way to spend time and ventured into their medicine volumes to see how her healing differed from theirs. She spent many afternoons like this with just her, her thoughts and the books for company. Aki and the rest of the palace staff were nice to talk to as well, but they were always much too deferential and busy with one thing or the other. She’d tried to help and get involved, but this seemed to them an affront to their skills and service, so she’d stopped. And this was how, by the end of one month in the Fire Nation, they all knew several new fables, more of the world’s history and politics than before and much more maths than any of them knew what to do with (although Bumi and Izumi seemed to enjoy this too).

Izumi sometimes came for their waterbending lessons in the evenings. She was in awe of the fluid movements involved and the way that Katara could miraculously cure any scrape, defying all laws of the Fire Nation’s very modern medicine. One time, when Kya was feeling particularly homesick, Katara turned half the water in the fountain into snow and made it fall atop the girls (in what she considered a particularly masterful display of bending). Kya was overjoyed while Izumi was initially baffled at this strange powdery cold thing that she’d only read about in geography books. It didn’t take her too long to figure out how it worked, though, when Tenzin hit her in the side with a well-placed snowball. She retaliated, but missed and hit Bumi and then it was all out war between the boys and girls, with Katara responsible for making sure that the snow didn’t melt away. It was exhausting but a fascinating exercise in focus and very rewarding once she saw their smiles. She also thought she saw a figure in black in the shadows, but he didn’t acknowledge her, so neither did she.

Zuko was always too busy for her, in meetings or with paperwork and she didn’t want to impose on him in his work hours. She frequented the fountain, but never saw him there again. She did not try the pond, only because she felt guilty intruding, when he very clearly did not want her near him. Thus, the only time that she did see him was dinner or rushing by in the corridors, when he waved at her hastily. Katara assumed that Zuko hadn’t managed to fulfil at least one aspect of his promise then, because he was simply never available. That’s not to say he was ever rude. In fact, he was always polite and courteous whenever they spoke but it was the cool façade of a stranger, never the warmth of a friend. One day, she couldn’t find any of the others before their daily dinner although they’d all come back from the Academy. When asked, Aki just told her that they were “In Firelord Zuko’s office.” It turned out that he really was always free for them. They would visit him at all hours, ask him questions and Bumi even claimed that he’d helped with the paperwork. He would teach them whatever they hadn’t understood in school that day or they’d make paper fliers which they’d race across the office. She’d tried telling them to not trouble him, but all parties claimed that it was no trouble. She found that while she was glad her kids had found themselves a new friend, she was missing hers. Which was why she finally decided to take matters into her own hands.

Notes:

Canon Aang is possessive and has gone into the Avatar state on losing his temper and that is what she's afraid of. Of course, the Best Relationship Ever has no communication, as seen in the show. This is Katara's fault as well, honestly and I hope I'm not coming across as Anti- Aang because I really am not.
Zuko has a reason to be kinda upset with her, I'll address that soon and as for what happened to Mai, I have dropped hints through the chapters, but will be talked about explicitly a few chapters later. Thanks for reading!
Edit: if there are any Indians/ Desis reading this, I took the dance scene out of Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na, the Bollywood movie. Did anyone notice? Also Aang overheard the prediction and is reminding her of it in his proposal. Idk how many people got that, but I'm specifying it now for future readers.

Chapter 6: Burned Bridges and How to Repair Them

Notes:

From this chapter on, the past i.e. the part in italics will have marital discord bits in it. So you can avoid that if you wish to.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Katara married Aang with much ceremony. The wedding took place in the Southern Air Temple and was attended by a number of dignitaries: from the Fire Lord and Lady to the Earth King to the Chief of the Northern Water Tribe and all the War Heroes. They had managed to research Air Nomad traditions and borrowed some from their sister tribe since the South’s were deemed too simplistic for an affair of such epic proportions.

Aang looked handsome in his orange robes, tall and proud with the widest smile on his face. Katara wore robes of yellow and blue, adorned by fur trimmings and beads with her hair half down and tied with feathers. They served food from all over the world and had a week of festivities before the actual ceremony with dance and games. There was an endless line of people calling them the most beautiful couple they’d seen, wishing them well, congratulating them, and Katara was satisfied. All was going as predicted. She had married a tall, powerful, handsome bender and a near deity- the saviour of the world. She had married an old friend, and they were in love.

The first few months went great. They journeyed across the world as before and everyone was delighted to meet the newly married Avatar and his wife. The only problem was that they always referred to her as such. She or Aang corrected them a few times, her temper bubbling, but there was no end to it and she realised that, yes that was indeed who she was. Fulfilling a chiefly ornamental position was her role. Might as well own up to it. But that did not mean she liked it. Back in the Tribes, she was at least known as a Master Waterbender (though there too ‘Avatar’s Girl’ had been a major talking point).

They visited the towns they’d been to in that one year of frantic running from the enemy and a few more. Even before Appa would land there’d be the locals crowding together, cheering. While she did enjoy the adulation, there was an incomplete feeling to it all. Adventure, sight-seeing and meeting new people was fun but she needed a home, a destination to come back to and constants in her life besides Appa, Momo, Aang and the clouds and skies. She had been wondering how to bring up the topic when she found that she was pregnant. It was a surprise. They hadn’t really planned on it, but she supposed they hadn’t taken any measures against it either. But Katara was excited; she felt that motherhood was something she’d accepted very early on and looked forward to since she was a child. She also had a wonderful feeling that things had worked out in her favour at just the right time, for now they would have to stay at one place that she could call home, a place where she could contribute in her own way. Aang was ecstatic too. He tried communing with his past lives every day and searched and searched for scrolls on raising children. Soon enough, word spread that there would be another air bender within the year and congratulations started pouring in from every corner. Aang understood that constantly being on the move was not a good idea and so they chose to go to the only place that he’d known as home and had stayed for prolonged periods and also the right place to raise an airbender child: the Southern Air Temple, currently undergoing reconstruction. So that was where they went along with all the Air Acolytes.

The Fire Nation had done its reparations and cleaned it up, sparing what funds it could but they all understood that there was only so much Zuko could do, what with his country’s struggling economy and the hate he received from some factions of his society every time he ‘gave away money to filthy foreigners’. It was thus an ongoing project running parallel to changing attitudes in his nation, but they all knew that the only way the temples could be restored to their former glory was with the return of the air benders. Living there was slightly difficult; the place was large and empty excluding their group, and some parts were in shambles. Still, she knew how important this was for Aang, knew that he had no other real home and let it slide. She was of water after all, she could accommodate when needed.

However, it grew on her slowly- the feeling that she had no role here either. At least back in the Tribe she had been teaching and healing, contributing in some small way to the community. And with this feeling, her homesickness grew too. The need to do something to occupy her time and the slowly growing loneliness of having no one to talk to had begun gnawing at her, especially when Aang left on missions for weeks at a stretch. The acolytes were no help at all. They all idolised and (Katara privately thought) fancied her husband. They’d be deferential, but not friendly, respectful but only because of her status as Aang’s wife.

Her friends’ letters kept her company in the lonely nights when her husband was away. That was how she found out that Sokka had begun training as the next Chief, Suki was thinking of ways to manage her duties on Kyoshi Island while trying to figure out a way to fit in with the very backward lifestyle of the Southern Tribe- honestly, after seeing the respect and positions women over the world were given, Katara couldn’t fault her for her hesitation- and that Toph was tasked with removing the walls in Ba Sing Se. But she looked forward to one person’s letters the most.

She would tell him exactly what was on her mind and eagerly await his reply. These were always prompt. She’d then read the correspondence once, hastily, then again slowly and then a third time while penning a response. He would somehow understand her perfectly, even though she herself didn’t at times and even asked her for advice which he seemed to value. The acolytes would frown with disapproval every time the Fire Nation Hawk made its appearance. She didn’t think much of it, but the acoustics of the temple were fantastic and she heard on more than one occasion:

“Looks like her boyfriend wrote to her again.”

“I’d heard rumours that she had an affair with him last summer.”

Allegations like these against her character made her queasy. Random people cheapening her time with Zuko to a sex thing made her nauseous. She tried confronting a few of them but this just seemed to perpetuate the notion that she and he were indeed a thing. They must have told Aang, because he questioned her about it the next time he returned.

“I don’t understand what the big deal is. We’re just friends. Am I not supposed to be excited by letters when I have no one else to talk to here?”

“The acolytes are here, I don’t know why you don’t get along.”

You mean your female fanclub? I’d rather not.' Although Katara itched to say this, it was not worth the argument that would inevitably ensue. The girls had willingly taken up this hermit- like lifestyle to propagate his culture. She was being delusional. So she just shook her head, eyes downcast with an “I don’t know.”

The whole thing played in her mind though, especially when the whispers seemed to grow with each correspondence. The only solution she could see was to reduce their frequency. Zuko noticed something was amiss and though he repeatedly asked her, she did not give her reasons. Doing that would serve no one.

Nearing the last month of her pregnancy, she received an alarming letter from Sokka telling her that Gran Gran was getting really sick and so, instead of calling her here for the delivery, she decided to go back home.

Home.

Because no matter the changes it had suffered, it still was the place she was born and raised in, not this ruin where she had lost her foothold and nearly fallen twice since becoming pregnant, scaring the living daylights out of her. That is why, when her husband returned, she put her foot down. There was no way she would continue staying here, friendless and in such hostile territory.

She gave birth to Bumi, a beautiful baby boy, named after Aang’s longest friend. She had insisted on ‘Kya’ if it was a girl, so Aang called dibs on naming their son. He was a perfect mix of the two of them and her pride and joy. It was a wonderful few weeks, surrounded by the love of her family.

However, soon enough the happiness faded as Gran- Gran passed away having held her great-grandchild. Aang was there for her, along with Sokka and her father. It was a difficult time, dealing with the loss of a mother figure yet again, opening up deep seated trauma that she had never truly healed from.  Zuko had offered to come by, but she’d declined. However his letters were always a comfort- he seemed to know just what to say, even more so in writing than he had face to face. She still beamed like a madwoman on spotting the hawk, she still dropped everything to read his letters, although they were less frequent now. And she still got odd looks for her behaviour- this time from her tribespeople as well as the acolytes. Aang in particular detested it and brought it up a number of times. Katara tried explaining repeatedly as calmly as she could. Women were not supposed to yell at their husbands in the Tribes and shouting matches always got unwanted attention one way or the other. However, her husband need not have brought it up, because the letters stopped abruptly for some time after that. Which was just fine by her. She had her people here, her family and her beautiful baby boy and he had a life there, a nation to run. She wouldn’t miss him. Certainly not. 

He wrote again, much later, but it felt different. The tone was colder. In fact, it was from the acolytes that she heard that the Fire Nation’s Royal Couple were trying. The girl who told her was quite gleeful about it and seemed to become even more so on seeing Katara’s face fall. He needed an heir so this was to be expected, but that didn’t explain why he hadn’t told her himself. It also didn’t explain the sharp pain in her chest. On further reflection, this whole episode confused her and she didn’t reply to the next two letters. The third one told her that they’d lost the child. She felt horrible about herself after that.

Aang still travelled. It was Avatar duties and couldn’t be avoided, Katara had people to take care of her since she’d opted to stay in the Southern Tribe for the foreseeable future. She immersed herself in teaching, healing and occasionally advising Sokka. Suki married him around the same time that Katara fell pregnant again. The letters between her and Zuko had nearly stopped by then. He attended the wedding day, but they didn’t speak apart from the perfunctory greeting. She wanted to try and talk to him the next day, but he’d left. Later, she learned from Suki that Mai was expecting too, which was why he hadn’t stayed. It was for the best, she told herself. The confusing fluttering in her heart that surfaced every time someone mentioned him would finally stop. The summer felt like a far off dream. Katara found that she was happy for him, for the two of them, truly. It was high time and even they’d heard the dissent from the Fire Nation about their ruler’s inability to produce an heir.

When she was six months along, an urgent message came through, though, that the Fire Lady was in need of healers. It was an emergency. Luckily Aang was with her at the time and they flew as fast as they could to the Palace, but it was too late. The Fire Nation had gotten its future ruler at the expense of its empress.

Zuko was distraught, inconsolable at the loss of one of his oldest friends. He had loved Mai and he clung to his baby, frail as she was, unwilling to let go of her. He blamed himself, wouldn’t talk to anyone and barely ate. Katara and Aang tried their best to get him to feel better, but there wasn’t much more to be done and they had to head back for the delivery of their second child. Ty Lee decided to stay back. She, Kiyi, Ursa and (to their collective surprise) a still recovering Azula stuck around with Zuko. All of Katara’s letters to him went unanswered and the few that were, got very clipped replies.

In a few months’ time, Katara had Kya, a beautiful and healthy girl who, she was fairly certain, was a water bender. She just knew and it became apparent by the time she reached one year of age. It was also apparent that no amount of waiting around or showing him air currents or frozen water was going to turn Bumi into any sort of a bender. Aang tried to hide it, but he was disappointed. It was apparent in how he was more distant to his children than before and was away on duty longer.

They tried one more time. This time there was no tragedy midway or immediately after her pregnancy. The way her husband’s face lit up when they realised that their youngest could air bend was a sight to behold. He was attached to the child in a way that he hadn’t been to the other two, and although it didn’t sit right with her, she understood that this was his way of dispelling some of his own deep-seated loneliness and pressure of being the last of his kind.

And for a while, all was as it should be.

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The next afternoon, Katara walked up to Zuko’s office. She reasoned that he had offered her an open invitation after all- he had no reason to mind. The guards let her in no questions asked, staring straight ahead. On entering, she realised that this too was a large complex with lounge rooms and meeting halls large and small. Finding the way to his personal office - which was an inconspicuous door with only the embossed twin dragons on the handle serving as a give-away - took a bit of time. She knocked and a raspy but deep voice called out, “Come in.”

Inside, she found a harried looking Fire Lord hidden behind stacks of documents, the top of his crown barely visible and his daughter doing her homework next to him, sitting cross legged. He stood up to greet her, ink on his face and smooth black hair unbound. On noticing who it was, his forehead creased, “Ah, Katara, good afternoon, what can I help you with?”

“I just wanted to talk to you, privately if possible?” She asked, a nervous smile on her face. Zuko looked over at Izumi who nodded, gathered her things and left with an “I’ll be coming to see the waterbending practice tonight, Auntie Katara, wait up for me!” Katara grinned back “Of course.” The lessons would simply not be the same without her and Kya loved having an audience to perform for.

“You know, she never comes to see me firebending? Says it’s just too early for her to function.” He said, looking at Izumi’s retreating back fondly. The door swung shut and he gestured at the vacant seat in front of him, sitting only when Katara had taken it.

“Well, she’s right. You wake up at an ungodly hour.” He just huffed and then looked at her expectantly and Katara realised that there was no skirting the issue.

“You’ve been ignoring me,” she said, point blank, looking at him, arms folded in front of her. Direct confrontation had always been her favoured style, though for reasons unknown, she hadn’t chosen it when dealing with... Never mind. He avoided her gaze. “No, I haven’t.”

“No?” She arched an eyebrow. “Then how come I never see you?”

“You see me at dinner, and at other times... I have stuff to do – meetings, some crisis or the other, proposals to look at, which reminds me…” he trailed off rubbing the back of his neck and messing up his hair even more as he looked around helplessly. She persisted.

“Tell me how I can help. Give me something to do. If you don’t have time to spare, you’ll find that I have lots of it. I can work with you.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose, still firmly avoiding her gaze. “It’s nothing that you can help with, Katara. All business that comes to my table is mine and mine alone.” Which was funny because he was trying to sound serious, but in the state he was in, it didn’t really work. But still, a change of tactics was required. “All business that comes to this table is mine and and mine alone”, she repeated, deepening her voice to imitate him and he finally looked up at her, eyes narrowed.

“Ha ha, real mature Katara that has to be the worst impression of me that I’ve heard.” He replied imperiously, but she could see a smile in his eyes and she answered with, “Thank You, my Lord” as loftily as she could. There was a slight pause and shaking her head, she tried one more time, softly, sincerely.

“Zuko, I’m tired of this. I don’t know what happened in the middle, what went wrong. The letters slowed down and then stopped, and then we weren’t talking at gatherings and it must have been my fault as well, and I’m sorry, but let me be your friend again. Let me help you, please,” she beseeched. She hoped that one day they’d have a conversation regarding this. It was long overdue, but for now it was baby steps. He looked a little lost, contemplating her words, and sensing weakness she finally went for the kill, pulling a snowpuppy face of her own, that she knew for a fact had worked on her old friend. Sure enough, he took one look at her and snapped, “Stop that!” face scrunched up in disgruntlement like a baby rabbaroo.

“Then let me do the paperwork with you,” she countered, sitting up straight.  “Bumi said he did it and if that’s true, then so can I.”

“He’s exaggerating!” But he knew when he was beat and sighing loudly, he rolled his eyes and pushed one stack towards her, “Fine... help yourself… And don’t look so smug!” She hid her smile behind her hand then, pulling the first document she could reach.

He was right- all of them were addressed to him, but some were so ridiculous that she rejected them without a second glance while the rest she passed on. She was fairly certain that Zuko wanted nothing to do with building spikes on footpaths so the homeless were driven to the forests or with legalising Komodo Rhino fights to the death. After a bit, she suggested that she go through all of them first –she’d eliminate the terrible ones so that Zuko’s energy and time were saved for the worthier causes.

Quite a few of them baffled her, like the pensions to war veterans and what the big deal with opium farming was. But Zuko kept them in the important section with brief explanations as to why, so she resolved to read up on those topics and discuss them later. Some of the Fire Nation’s issues were so far removed from anything she’d seen in the Tribes. But it felt good to be of help, of a sort, after more than two months of sitting on her ass. Even though it was clearly not the most thrilling job in the world, she felt fulfilled. Going through yet another ridiculous proposal, this one fourteen pages long, citing the minister’s reasons and arguments she pondered out loud, “Hmm, Zuko what do you say about making blood orange the new official colour of the Fire Nation?”

“That has to be Minister Han. Pretentious little shit. Bin.” and he pointed in the general direction of the dustbin, not even bothering to look up. “I don’t know, Zuko,” Katara said thoughtfully, still going through it. “Some of these arguments make sense. Red is for the masses and you would indeed look ravishing in blood orange robes-” At this, he looked up with an expression of utter disgust, pulled the proposal away from her, ignoring her outraged “Hey!” tore it up into pieces which he then set on fire. Her alarm morphed into quiet amusement. “You should consider an alternative career in drama,” she commented drily, picking up the next one. He didn’t reply, but she saw his grin as he too returned to work.

From time to time, she’d look up at him to compare how much they’d done. The ink on his face was irritating her; he himself didn’t notice it, and she desperately wanted to wipe it off, but didn’t dare. She already felt like he didn’t want her here, not really and this would be a direct invasion of his boundaries. So Katara pulled her attention away from him, scratching her nose with the tip of her brush and turned it back to the matter at hand. She missed the look he shot her immediately afterwards.

“The Northern Water Tribe sure is a bunch of assholes,” he said out of the blue after some time. “No offence.” Noticing that he was going through Ambassador Panuk’s proposal, she said, “He’s asking for more fishing territory isn’t he, as war reparations? I thought you were done with those, at least for the Northern Tribe?”

“We are!” he yelled, outraged. Throwing the document on the table, he massaged his head as though soothing away an incoming headache. “This is just him trying to emotionally blackmail me. Did you read the wording, making me out to be some sort of… Ozai.” He sighed, and put it in the ‘maybe’ pile. “Can’t come off as a genocidal maniac,” he muttered. She sympathised with him.

She knew all too well how manipulative Northerners could be. Sokka had had enough complaints of his own. “I’ve had a few dealings with them. I could try to help you out, let me think a little” she offered.

“Thanks Katara, I’d love to hear it” he smiled back.

 More than two hours later, they were finally done and she stretched, getting up to go. She was quite pleased, the mission had been a success. They’d actually spoken to each other, and worked alongside. He’d chuckled at her jokes (although no one else did) and appreciated her meticulous system of dividing work and filing papers (although he already had his own). Even when they were younger, he’d be the only one laughing at her jokes and she at his. The others had always seemed exasperated but it had made her feel valued, like he enjoyed her company. When she worked alongside Sokka, he’d get worn out by her ‘constant and obsessive nagging’. Time spent with Zuko felt like a welcome change. She didn’t enjoy the paperwork, but she did enjoy working next to her old friend. And since she was here for a limited period, she thought it best to find a new pastime and this would do for now. She also felt like maybe he wasn’t lost to her after all. That all those years of silence were turning to dust in front of her eyes.

Getting up to go she said, “This was fun, let’s do it again.”

This statement was met with silence. The resounding type where one can hear a pin drop. After a while, it settled into something awkward and heavy. Her breath sounded loud to her own ears. She turned back to him expectantly.

 “Uhh… let’s not.” Zuko replied, after a while, rubbing the back of his head and looking away from her.

This puzzled her. She thought their afternoon had been fun. Hadn’t it? Had she been mistaken? Was their friendship that irreparably broken? The lightness surrounding her evaporated along with her smile and she asked him quietly,

“Why?”

He didn’t reply, finding something interesting on his desk to stare at. Of course, she realised. He’d only been humouring her. There had never been any real connection. She could almost laugh. Why would he enjoy her intruding in his life? Katara could feel her heart breaking. Again. Tears had begun forming in the corners of her eyes as she resolutely turned her back and walked towards the door, her shoes loud on the stone floor. No matter what he thought, she could take a hint. She was not wanted, not here, nor anywhere else. It was foolish of her to think otherwise.

You’re my forever girl.

 Her head was beginning to hurt. Water bending was not happening that evening. Dragging herself to dinner would be a feat. She could only hope that he wouldn’t turn up, though what reason he’d give, she didn’t know, since they’d completed all his work. Katara was nearly out the door when she finally heard his voice, so quiet that she half-thought she was imagining it.

“Because I could get used to you.”

That night sleep eluded her. His words played in her head on repeat. Katara had no idea what to make of them. One moment he was friendly, another he was aloof, next he was cryptic. But one thing she was quite sure about: that there was no point in staying here. She’d announce it the next day. Hadn’t he made it amply clear that he wanted nothing to do with her?  He didn’t want to build the bond that they had back up again, wasn’t that what he meant? It had to be, and if so, no amount of laughter-drenched memories could keep her here anymore. Because that’s what they were, memories.  She had burned her fair share of bridges and it was not his fault that he did not want to build them back. It was fine. She’d understand. But she couldn't force someone to like her, she wouldn't beg. Even after all the blows her pride had taken, she still had some left.

But still, somehow she couldn’t believe that he was so… so indifferent to her. She didn’t know why.  She spent hours tossing and turning. Considering all the possibilities for her future and that of her children. Perhaps she would visit Toph. She had two daughters too, they’d all get along just fine. She didn’t understand her reluctance to leave this place. Finally, frustrated, she wrapped a robe around her nightgown and walked out of her room with every intention of nicking a bottle of wine from the kitchens. The insomnia had to be dealt with one way or the other. Her mission was derailed when mysteriously, once she was halfway there, a light breeze fluttered her night robes in the otherwise still night. She looked around to see a trail of moonlight leading out of the Palace proper and into the Gardens.

Yue, is that you?

She had travelled with Aang enough to not discount spirit interference. This could very well mean nothing, but it could also be a message. And so she strolled out, waving away the concerned guards. Moonbeams guided her through the still night to a track covered in hedges and shrubbery, a place she hadn’t noticed before. It was poorly tended and brambles caught on her clothes. Wildflowers grew everywhere and there were patches where overhanging branches nearly blocked the moonlight. It felt like she was going farther away from her rooms. Gradually though, the path widened and opened out to a place she recognised. It seemed she’d taken a shorter cut to the abandoned fountain at the edge of the grounds. Except at that moment it wasn’t abandoned. A figure in black was hunched over it, holding the ledge for support and slowly moving along as though in great pain. The figure turned to show a nasty gash on their abdomen and a scarred face. She gasped.

Zuko!

She ran to him, uncaring if her clothes caught in the nettles or got muddied anymore. She was frightened, truly, her mind running through a constant stream of possibilities as every moment that brought her closer to him painted a more grotesque picture of his injuries. A cacophony of alarmed sounds and half voiced fears had begun playing in her head, and all she could think of in that moment was: no, no, no, please no. This couldn’t be happening. He couldn’t die. Yue wouldn’t have brought her here just to watch him die, would she. Katara had nearly seen that once. Lightning flashed through her mind and her speed increased. There was no way that was happening again. She would make sure of it.

She could pinpoint the moment he noticed her because he startled and looked like he was about to take a bending pose when he noticed who it was barrelling towards him. “Katara…?” he managed to croak out just as she reached him and took hold of his shoulders. Pushing him towards the ledge so he sat down, she ordered him to remove his upper garments and examined the damage. There were two lacerations running across his torso, both of which were bleeding profusely. She could smell the metallic tang of blood freely flowing. He looked really pale, face scrunched up in pain. The breath caught in her throat and she took a minute to steel herself. She had to focus. She had to believe that she could heal him. He was counting on her. She grasped his hands firmly, squeezed them, and once she’d collected herself, her instincts took over. Immediately, she pulled the water out of the fountain and began going over his injuries. He yelped at the unexpected chill.

“Shh… Oh Zuko. what have you done?” she asked, almost to herself.

“Well if you notice the angle of the wounds, they were clearly not self-inflicted”, he forced out through gritted teeth, trying for a smile but only managing a grimace.

“I should have known you were doing something ridiculously dangerous out there,” she muttered, ignoring him completely.

“It’s not-”

“You really are an idiot with a death wish.”

 “Hey!”

“Oh hush.” The next half an hour she focused and continued talking to herself to ease some of her stress and to reassure him (but mostly to reassure herself). And also because he kept nodding off as she worked, and she couldn’t let him fall asleep. The wounds were not as deep as she’d feared and she thought she was doing a reasonably good job. His vitals seemed steady and once she was satisfied, she woke him up. “Come on, we need to get you to your room.”

He just looked at her dazedly. “Hm? Oh okay” and made to stand up and nearly fell on her.

 “It’s okay, I’ve got you. I’ve got you, big guy.” She supported him on one side, one of his arms around her shoulder, one of hers holding on to his waist and his pack on her back. He leaned on her heavily as they trudged through silent hallways while avoiding the guards.  Zuko was still aware of his surroundings enough to be stealthy and they snuck through the door behind the Ugly Fire Sage to enter his quarters. He stumbled to his bed and sat down, lighting the lantern next to it. “Where do you keep your bandages? You must have them around here somewhere,” she asked and he pointed at his bedside drawer. She pulled them out along with a pot of salve.

“This feels vaguely familiar,” Zuko mumbled as she began applying the mix on his wounds. Katara just glared at him.

Trying to make light of the situation, he smirked and said, “Thank You, Katara.” This did not get the reaction he’d expected, because she increased the intensity of her glare and he got an adorable (not that she would ever say it out loud) confused-sleepy expression on his face.

“You nearly died. Again. And you’re making jokes about it. Really, Zuko,” she said stroppily. He had the good sense to look sheepish. “Raise your arms,” she ordered. And with more force than was strictly necessary, started wrapping him in the bandages.

"Ow! Okay, sorry! I’m sorry. Won’t make jokes again,” he gasped out and she slowed down.

“Will you at least tell me where it is that you go? What you do?” she asked, nearly pleading in her approach.

He hung his head and she sighed loudly, returning to her work but this time in silence. She was slightly disappointed but not surprised. She tried not to think about it, the dangers he might be facing every time he left and focused only on her work. Soon, the only sounds in the room were the occasional eagle-owl and their own breathing. His breath brushed her neck as she bent over him, and suddenly she was acutely aware of the situation they were in. He was sitting less than a handspan away, alone in his apartments, in the near dark with her fingers on his bare skin. He always ran warm and this time was no different. His skin was calloused with scars new and old, but beneath that was firm muscle. She slowed down slightly, taking him in and running a finger across a particularly nasty looking scar. She wondered where it had come from, how long ago. It was rough to touch and she found that she couldn’t move away.

 Her eyes flicked to him, only to see him already looking at her. She held his gaze for half a beat, the proximity to his gold eyes hypnotizing. There was something heated in his gaze, something different. It drew her in and made her think of another time long ago when he’d asked her for a dance on a balcony. He held still as she lifted her hands off him. Then she cleared her throat and both of them looked away quickly. But Katara could feel warmth on her neck and cheeks. She leaned down one final time to tie up the last bits and where his skin touched hers, it tingled. Suddenly, she felt very shy.

It was his turn to break the silence as he mumbled, “I have no idea how I’m going to stay up through tomorrow’s meeting.” This immediately alerted Katara. “What meeting? You’re going nowhere. If you think I’m going to let you out of here until you’re completely healed, you have another thing coming,” she said, voice rising in pitch.

“Kataraa…” he beseeched, “It’s important. Agricultural subsidies…ugh kill me now” he facepalmed as he lowered himself on his bed.

“They can wait. Everything else can wait. It’s bedrest till you fully recover,” she replied firmly, hands on her hips, staring him down. He surprised her by suddenly smirking at her, propped up on one elbow. “Joke's on you, remind me who among the two of us rises with the sun?”

That did it. She sat herself on the bed, swinging her legs over and leaning on the head board. “Try to leave and face my wrath.” There was no way she was letting him out of her sight till he was fully healed. There would be no more near-deaths or ugly scars if she had anything to say about it. Katara snuck a look at him through the corner of her eye to see that he was staring at her wide-eyed. She looked away.

“Are you going to just sit here the whole night?” he asked in wonder.

“Yes,” she replied, staring straight at the opposite wall.

“Do you realize how improper this is?” He asked her again and she just raised an eyebrow at him.

“Don’t worry, I won’t take advantage of you,” she said loftily.

This made him snort, but he caught her by surprise with his next words, “Sleep next to me if you insist on staying here. Sitting will just give you a bad back tomorrow.”

“Don’t you worry about me.”

“Katara, I insist. There’s enough space on the bed,” he said, rolling to the far side. This she had to agree with. The bed was bigger than the entirety of her sleeping quarters back home.

 “Fine.”

Removing her outer robe, she pulled up the blankets to tuck them both in. “I will see you tomorrow, in here, resting. Or so help me, Yue.” She commanded, even as she heard muffled laughter from his end as he put the lights out. And then the only light was through the window. She burrowed herself in the sheets, feeling her exhaustion start to pull her under almost instantly. The last thing she remembered was a voice saying softly,

“Good night, Tara.”

 She slept more soundly than she had in a long time.

Notes:

Thank you all so much for all your lovely comments! I cannot express how much I appreciate them. Writing romance is hard and maybe I'll never be able to spin words into poetry, but thank you for reading the stuff I put up. Also, if anyone is up for beta-ing this work, let me know! You can reach me on my Tumblr @that-turtleduck
PS: today I learned the difference between burnt and burned.
Edit: I found myself a beta!

Chapter 7: A New Project

Summary:

Katara wakes up to a unique problem, makes a new friend and takes on a New Project.

Notes:

I'm really sorry this is late. I'd initially planned on updating every two weeks (I have made a rough outline of this story) but then my work life intervened. I have to thank my amazing amazing beta @myrsinemezzo for going over my work so diligently. Really, a lifesaver. And thank you all for your comments and kudos, I did not expect this story to become as popular as it has and I hope I won't disappoint with this update. Writing the flashback was a bit painful, I must admit. It'll last only till chapter 9/10. If you feel like you'd rather skip it, go ahead. It gives the present story more depth, but won't alter it otherwise. Once again, tw:divorce.
Also, I'll just remind everyone that I haven't read the comics cover to cover, because honestly, no one should be subjected to that.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

As the years passed, Katara of the Southern Water Tribe settled into her life. Peacetime was very different to everything that she’d experienced before they’d all gone and changed the world. She had all she’d wanted as a child. A lovely family, married to a good man, a way to contribute to the world via her waterbending and a respectable position in the tribe. Every morning she’d wake up early, do the housework and set out for the healing huts. Here she’d work till the evenings after which she’d teach her batch of pupils, mostly girls who would not have been recognised under male teachers. As the Southern Tribe’s numbers increased, so did her patients and students. She’d also take part in all festivities, and was one of the key organizers each time, because as she pointed out, it wasn’t her fault that no one else knew how to do these things right.

Katara of the Southern Water Tribe was generally regarded as a celebrity - the Avatar’s Wife. In that, her primary duties were to take care of the Avatar’s children and tend to her husband when he returned to stay with them. This was a fact of life, of which she was reminded daily in a million different ways by a million different people. The Avatar himself visited only in the summers, never in the winters. It was far too strenuous to bend himself warm every time and he refused to wear animal pelts or eat their meat-based diet on principle. Katara understood of course. It was only that sometimes, the loneliness got to her. All that time in those harsh cold months when she’d notice couples keeping each other warm, families complete and revelling in their little bubble of a home, she was reminded of that missing part of her own family, currently in some other corner of the world.

But she was a patient woman. She waited for him and he returned with the spring. People praised their love and commended her, but most times she just felt a tiny bit empty inside. The time that he did spend with them however, was some of the best parts of the year. The people loved him and there was always joyous merrymaking when he came- nearly a week or so of festivities in his honour. Team Avatar would have a mini reunion which was made even better every time Toph joined. They’d bring news of the developments around the world, especially the new city they were planning on (they were still undecided about the name). It was the beginning of a new era and everyone was excited.

Katara of the Southern Water Tribe also rarely left the Southern Water Tribe. She had nearly stopped going with Aang on adventures, because she’d found that there was clearly no need. He was more than enough to handle most problems and it was he who the people really wanted. The few times she went, she realised that her role was the same as before- mainly ornamental along with the added bonus of supporting and looking after him, a job which one or two of the acolytes could do easily and much more enthusiastically. A person of Katara’s skill was not required; she could do more good staying where she was at the Southern Water Tribe where she had children to raise and was actually required.

That’s why, every time he asked her, she’d state that she was just too busy and that she couldn’t predict when medical emergencies might arise and thus, couldn’t leave for long periods. This argument worked just fine for the first few summers, but later he became antsy. His face would fall and he’d sulk every time she declined. One fine day, when they’d already had a quarrel beforehand, he suggested they take a week-long trip to the Eastern Air Temple.

“You know that the journey itself will take a week, I can’t leave for that long” she sighed into her sewing, and he finally burst, the way he had done only one other time, in the desert so many years ago.

“Why won’t you even consider it? You aren’t even looking for a solution! No Katara, the problem isn’t that you're busy, it’s that you don’t care about me enough. For spirits’ sake, we’re married, can’t we spend some real time together? Am I not a priority too?” She could have brought up that it was he who never stayed in winters or kept leaving in the summers but she didn’t. Instead she looked away, trying not to let the anger and frustration rise. Seemingly getting more worked up with her silence, he went on, now all-out yelling at her. “You don’t want to go to the Southern Air Temple because you hate the acolytes, you don’t want to go to the Southern Earth Kingdom because we’ve been there too often, you don’t want to go anywhere else because it’s too far away and you don’t want to visit our friends because you’re busy and they might be busy and it’s rude to interrupt. Did I get all that right?” She had nothing to stay to that as well but wondered if everyone would know about their quarrel already before her first healing session tomorrow.

“Let’s take a vacation as a family, Katara, you used to enjoy that. You used to love travelling and seeing new things, you wanted to meet new people, what’s different now?” Here she tried to speak but he just huffed in frustration, “And DO NOT say you’re absolutely needed here again. I’ve seen your healing huts, they could easily work without you there. And someone else could teach in your absence. You’ve trained enough masters.” And then finally, he beseeched her, “Come on Katara, if not as a family, let’s go somewhere, just the two of us. As husband and wife.”

But Katara had stopped listening some time ago. Her head throbbed and everything had started looking blurry and it felt like the room was converging on her. Aang was still saying something, but she turned around and walked out of the house.

It was Sokka who found her, hours later in the ice cave that used to be their secret hideout. He casually sat himself next to her, stretched out and started talking. Most of the first part didn’t really filter through to her brain, but she managed to focus a little later “…They’ve decided on Republic City as a name. Still think they should have gone with Boomerang Town. So much cooler. I actually suggested it but was vetoed out. Zuko voted against me, our friend Zuko! It was such a betrayal. My heart broke. In two. So we had to duel to level the playing field. I won of course. He is heavily invested in this project, you can make it out in his letters. He can’t shut up about it.” And there was a very pointed silence.

“I wouldn’t know, we haven’t really communicated in a while.” She said silently. She missed him, especially in times like these. So much. He’d know exactly what to say while also bumbling and messing up some quote from his uncle which would then make her laugh. She missed him.

Sokka paused as he studied her. Then: “Anyway, as I was saying, this place is going to be really cool. A melting pot of all cultures and people, benders and non-benders! Come to the next conference with me, you’ll love it. And we’re building the place, so statues for all of us!! Or whoever is in Toph’s good books anyway. Speaking of, she’s also playing an active role in this, routing everyone trying to derail this project in some way, like some sort of police. She still won’t tell me who the fathers are…” He kept going for quite a while. Talking about everything and nothing. Somehow, Zuko’s name did not come up again. Finally, nearly an age later, he shut up after she put her arms around him. He hugged her back, tightly, not making a single comment even as she started sniffling in his furs. When she finally withdrew, he only said, “Throat’s parched, bend me some water will you?”

Once that was done, Sokka bravely dived in, “Why don’t you just go with him?”

“I’m busy wi-”

“No, Katara, the real reason. You and I both know that you’ve trained enough benders here for them to carry out your duties for a while at least.” She opened her mouth to reply, then shut it. Sokka waited patiently next to her. “You don’t know that, what if there was some emergency that only I could handle, you need my help too sometimes, so does dad-”

“We’ll manage somehow, you deserve a vacation.”

“-and I can’t just leave the children and roam around the world, I have responsibilities-”

“Suki and I will look after them-”

“I’m more than just his wife, Sokka!”

At this he shut up, though he still looked confused. “Even though everyone else is intent on forgetting that” she continued, although speaking was getting more difficult by the minute as she struggled to voice all that she’d felt over the years.

“I have a role here and I’d like to think I’m not all that replaceable in it.” She said finally, her shoulders slumping. Her brother held her, his expression turning unexpectedly serious.
Sokka apparently took her words to heart, and his solution was to involve her more in his council. When before he’d only requested her presence for anything to do with waterbending or healing, now he’d bully her into attending and involve her even in those matters that she felt she didn’t have enough expertise in. Katara didn’t have any formal role in these proceedings since all those were already taken and they couldn’t just give her one or make a new one without accusations of nepotism, especially since Sokka himself wanted to institute a system where the people chose their leaders in the future.

This strategy worked in that now, she knew more about international politics, the squabbles between the sister tribes, the plans and execution of Republic City and Air Temple Island near it (the other Air Temples had been cleaned up, but would be nothing more than relics till there were enough air benders to occupy and maintain them). Her status grew in both the Tribes due to her changing role and ever increasing duties (courtesy of Sokka) and when in a year, she started proposing plans and policies and trade agreements, it was with a changed outlook and a sense of freedom. There were more and more who looked at her as a councilwoman and problem-solver. She always had the people’s best interests at heart in everything she did and the people were beginning to realise that. It also helped that she truly enjoyed the work that she did.

However, the problem lay in that, no matter how much she did for them, the fact was that almost all the seats in the council were taken by men with only Suki acting as an Earth Kingdom ambassador. Most were of the opinion that as Avatar’s wife and Healer in Chief, she was shirking her duty by attending these meetings. Some were upset that her words held as much weight as theirs and the fact that she- a woman- often had more knowledge than them. Subtle taunts were made, her talents undermined and allegations thrown that the only reason she had her seat was because she was related to two powerful men. Suki was exempt from much of this because she was essentially a foreigner and it was obvious that she’d be progressive and different than their tribal women who were made primarily for housework. The result being that she had to struggle that much more to be taken seriously and had to learn to make her proposals watertight. She had to plead, reason, argue and on more than one occasion threaten misogynists. Truth be told, she loved doing it and was passionate about bringing a positive change. Attitudes began changing, slowly but surely, though often the effort involved in this endeavour left her completely drained.

Still, no matter how she improved the drainage system or built shelters and ice parks, the fact remained that she was first and foremost the Avatar’s Wife and that was how her people saw her. It simply was an inescapable fact of life.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Katara woke up to sunlight on her face. She blinked dazedly, why was it so bright? Had she forgotten to close the curtains before sleeping? Ugh. Trying to block out the light, she pulled the red sheets over her head, but it was much too bright. There was nothing to it, she'd have to close them. A pity too, she couldn't remember the last time she'd slept so well. With a sigh she moved to sit upright. Or she would have, had it not been for the band on her waist holding her down. She was confused for a minute, and then her head cleared a little.

Wait. The room was too red, the bedding too firm, it couldn't possibly be hers, where was she?? Her shoulders tensed, preparing for a fight or flight response and she racked her brain for answers as the events of last night rushed back to her: the walk, finding Zuko, patching him up, going back to his room, staying there. She relaxed, but then, it struck her: the sunlight. It was too harsh, what time was it? The sun was higher in the sky than it usually was when she awoke and definitely higher than whatever time Zuko was used to. Had he gotten the better of her after all? Slipped out while she snored away like an otter-penguin? She groaned. Well she'd just have to chase him down and make him pay. He was her patient now, and honestly should've known better than to cross her. Katara tried to get up once again and the thing holding her down shifted, tightened its hold and breathed out on her hair. She felt more than heard a rumbling from below her.

Oh.

As she craned her neck up, she finally fully came to her senses and realised her position. The band pressing on her waist? That was a pale arm. Her legs were tangled with his and one of her own arms was on his chest, which she'd confused with bedding earlier. Speaking of which, his torso was bare save for the bandages and she could feel muscle underneath. Apparently, she had rolled sometime in the night and was now sleeping almost atop him while he held her, chin on her head. She could feel every breath he took, and when she looked up, all she could smell was him: slightly smoky with a hint of the sandalwood she remembered. In sleep, he looked more at peace than she'd ever seen him and much younger. He looked more than anything like the boy she’d left behind. When she tried to get up again, he brought up his other arm to hold her to him. Warmth enveloped her, and Katara inhaled deeply, closing her eyes. Almost of their own volition her fingers traced scars earned long ago, revelling in the feel of the skin underneath. For a minute her train of thought took her to an imaginary land where Zuko held her every night in the harsh winters of the poles and she snuggled closer. He sighed out loud, nuzzling her head and she felt irrationally happy. This was lovely, she thought, this was cosy, this felt right. She could almost believe she felt at peace too. As if she could stay like this forever.

You are my forever girl.

This was wrong. She should move. If someone saw them, they'd get a completely wrong idea and if Zuko woke up like this, he'd be disgusted and she’d be embarrassed and things would get even more awkward and she shouldn't be thinking the stuff that she had been thinking and she had to move. She tried to worm out of his hold and he just tightened it, frowning a bit. Next, she tried to loosen his arms, but that didn't work either, he just wouldn't let go, only making a whiny sound in response. Frustrated, she felt like making one herself, or better yet, snuggling and going right back to sleep. But it was getting late, the children would be up and there would be people asking for both of them. She struggled a bit more, and finally, he woke up, arms relaxing.

Groggily, he asked her, "Katara.. what..." Then looking around, he came to terms with the situation much faster than she had, pulling his arms away and putting about three feet of distance between them faster than she could begin explaining.

Without his warmth, she felt bereft almost instantly. A little empty, a little exposed and cold. A breeze flew in through the window and she pulled up the sheets to her chin, hugging them to herself. Come back half of her wanted to cry out. The other more sensible half told her she was being ridiculous. Zuko for his part, was lying facing the ceiling, with his hands covering his face. She could clearly see the dark red blush on his cheeks all the way to his chest and was pretty certain that she had a similar colour tinting hers.

"Look, I'm so, so sorry." He began, voice still rusty from sleep, "I'm such an idiot and I honestly don't even know what to say to you, I did not intend to paw at you like some pervert and, ugh, you have every right to be angry... " Katara privately thought he was being hilarious since angry was the very last thing she'd felt but there was no stopping the barrage of ill formed sentences that an embarrassed Zuko would let out.

She smiled a bit. Some things just don't change.

After a minute or so of this, she cut in, "Zuko, please stop beating yourself up. You haven't done anything dishonourable and I'm not upset. It was a mistake, my fault more than yours, clearly... I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable." She said the last part slowly and softly, for of course he'd despise her even more now, for literally throwing herself at him. As though he wasn't irritated with her for invading his personal space as it were. Hearing this, he removed his hands and turned to look at her with wide eyes and a puzzled expression, forehead scrunched as though he were solving a complicated math problem.

"I wasn't uncomfortable," he said, really quickly. And this time Katara widened her eyes as the daydream from earlier made its way to the forefront of her brain. She blushed some more, averting her gaze, when he followed up quickly with, "That's not to say we should do that again, of course not. Neither of us would want that. Obviously. I just meant that I wasn't uncomfortable."

Katara plastered on a smile, irrationally disappointed, "Obviously. This was a mistake, it won't happen again"

"Exactly. Just so we understand each other," he said in a monotone, face turned away from her.

And then there was silence, for a while, before he nearly shrieked out, "What's the time??!! The sun's high up, I'm late!!" And flung away the sheets to get out of bed, wincing as he did so.

Katara scooted across and closed the distance to latch on to his arm, "Oh no you don't! Not on my watch!"

"Katara I have a meeting!! It's important! I'll have to skip tea as it is, let go!!"

She only tightened her hold, now gripping his knee as well. "No. You are badly hurt and so you are staying RIGHT HERE IN BED where you will heal and I can keep an eye on you."

He struggled some more, trying to loosen her grip, but it was futile. It was also clear that every movement was causing him pain. She wound her arm through his keeping him down just as there were knocks from the door and a woman's voice called out, "My Lord, are you alright? May I come in?"

Katara and Zuko shared one alarmed glance, then he quickly called out, "Oh no, Reika, please don't. I'm uhh... I’m indecent. Just woke up...can’t find my clothes… nothing you'd like to see," Katara snorted at this, and he spared her an annoyed glance as he said, "Please keep the breakfast outside, thank you very much."

There was a pause, and then a highly suspicious, "If you say so, Firelord Zuko.”

Once they felt the coast was clear, she said to him, careful to keep her voice low, "You are not leaving this room. Or I will drag you back here from whatever meeting of subsidies you feel is more important than your health, that too in front of all your ministers and freeze the exits shut."

He must've seen something in her expression that reminded him of the time she'd nursed him back after the Agni Kai and relented. She made him promise to call the Palace Doctor and snuck out herself back to her rooms to get ready for the day. Here she was greeted with a chorus of questions but managed to convince her overprotective kids that she'd just been out for a long walk. Then, she doubled back to Zuko's chambers to officially 'find him unwell' after ‘a training session gone wrong’.

She began her second round of healing and started giving friendly suggestions to the palace staff on how to care for him. The older ones who recognised her didn't bother putting up resistance while the younger ones looked confused and slightly insulted that a guest was telling them how to do their job. But they all listened to her nevertheless as she sat at their ruler’s side and bullied him into cancelling all his meetings while he only looked on in fond exasperation. There was much activity as warmed water and clean bandages were brought in. It was to this setting that a short, well-groomed man in his forties walked in.

His brown eyes surveyed the scene and noticing his presence, the servants bowed and filed out quickly. His gaze then turned to Katara, fully expecting her to leave as well, but she raised her chin and glared back, still holding a wet cloth and sitting right next to Zuko. He walked up to them, looking mildly confused and bowed low, "My Lord."

"Good Morning, Doctor Nakamura, thank you for coming so promptly. I seem to have gotten in a bit of a scrape and I was so fortunate to have a friend to help me out. This” he said gesturing, “Is Master Katara of the Southern Water Tribe. Katara, this is our Palace Doctor."

The man's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open as he turned to her, "Master Katara! I had no idea! It truly is an honour and a privilege to meet you! Why, the woman who is an inspiration to the medical community the world over is before me! I've heard so much about you!" and he bent at the waist again, nearly as low as he had previously.

Katara was flustered. She fiddled with the cloth, blinked twice and then gathered herself enough to bow back and say, "It's a pleasure to meet you too, though I do think you flatter me too much."

"My lady is too modest. Suffice to say that the nation is very grateful to you for saving our Firelord's life" and here he paused, surveying Zuko's wounds at a glance, "Even though he himself cares very little for it. I suppose it's the usual thing your majesty?"

"The usual thing-?"

"Ignore him Katara,” Zuko interjected. “Nakamura as you can see, I'm well on my way to recovery so please tell Madam Bossy here to leave me alone."

"To answer your question, Master Katara," he said, completely ignoring Zuko while sitting himself on a chair and opening his big bag of tools, "He gets into such scrapes on the regular, I suspect, but calls me only a few times a year when they're really bad. I can point out the scars if you want. And even then he doesn't rest properly. I'm glad you're here, maybe you can knock some sense into him." At this, she glared at Zuko, who had the sense to look very sheepish as he helped remove the bandages, allowing himself to be examined again.

"These look quite nasty, how are they..." And the doctor looked up at Katara, realisation dawning on his face, "It seems the Fire Nation is once again indebted to you, Master Katara. Your healing prowess is truly beyond anything I have seen and I’ve been all over the world. Your majesty, you will be up and about in a week's time provided you rest. I can prescribe a painkiller and an antibiotic, but I suspect you don't need me for much else."

After he had told her about the fascinating solutions and pastes they’d be using, he got up to leave when suddenly, an idea struck her. Getting up to move closer to him, she said, "Thank you, Doctor, we'll be in touch. On a more personal note, I have been studying some of the medical books in the Palace Library for a few weeks now and was wondering if I could discuss them with you? Whenever you're free of course. Waterbending is all very well, but I've seen the cure for some ailments only in your science, quite a bit of which I don't understand."

The idea made sense to her: improving her abilities would help her serve the community better. And she couldn't possibly leave till Zuko was up on his feet. Might as well make good use of her time. The Doctor nodded back, "My office is in the Caldera Central Hospital and I usually get free by early evening, so we could have tea, my Lady. But you're free to drop by anytime you want, it would be an honour to have you. And if I may be so bold, we'd love it if you helped with the patients too, it feels like we're always understaffed." This was again pointed at Zuko, who steadily ignored him. Sighing, he said, "Good day, Master Katara, My Lord." And the door clicked shut.

She chuckled, picking up the medicines he’d left behind. "All you people are really obsessed with honour aren't you?" She could feel Zuko staring at her, something clearly on his mind. Pointedly avoiding him, she continued her task at hand.

Soon enough, he spoke: “I’m sorry about what happened in the office yesterday. I was unimaginably rude when it was completely uncalled for.”

She spared him a glance and nodded. Tentatively, she asked, “I know we haven’t been in touch and I’m a little unsure what exactly happened, but I’d like to be friends again, Zuko. If you want that too?”
“Friends,” he said slowly, as though tasting the word on his tongue. And then he smiled. And she smiled back.

Soon after, he started, “So, you wanted to learn what the problem with the Northern Water Tribe is…” They talked for a while. It was halting and there was no mention of their history or Aang or anything heavy, but it still felt good. Like they were peeling back the years. Resetting time.

A few hours later, Izumi flew into the room, followed by the rest of the kids and jumped on the bed, hugging Zuko tightly, hiding her face in his shoulder. He hugged her back, wincing all the way. “Daddy, daddy are you okay? Look at all these bandages, what happened? You never take a day off from work!” Then she pulled away and started sobbing, “Are you dying? Please don’t die too, daddy, please please don’t!”

This startled him into speech and he held her closer to him, kissing the top of her head, “No, no of course not sunshine. It’s nothing. It was Auntie Katara who forced me to take the day off-” Katara cleared her throat “- the next two days off while she heals me.”

“So you’ll be okay?” Izumi asked, pulling away slightly, glasses skewed. “Yes I will be.” She stopped crying then, but burrowed into his side nonetheless, sniffling quietly.

Kya piped up from behind them, “How did you get hurt, Uncle Zuko?”

“Was it while you were on a super secret mission fighting criminals?” Bumi asked excitedly and Zuko suddenly started coughing violently.

“Grow up, Bumi. He’s the Firelord not some ninja.” Kya quipped as she jumped on the bed to thump his back.

Bringing up the rear, Tenzin said sincerely, “I’m happy you’re alright, Uncle Zuko. We were all worried.”

Zuko smiled back warmly, “Thank you, Tenzin. I’m touched, really. Now come here, I want to know all about what happened today.” Izumi settled into bed next to him and Kya next to her as they all talked about their day and the upcoming field trip to the hot springs. They ended up having dinner in his chambers.

The day after was a school holiday and so she kept all the children on Zuko-sitting duty and made her way to the hospital where she asked for Nakamura. He seemed surprised to see her this soon but offered a tour of the place nevertheless.

It was a large structure, renovated fairly recently with five wings: one for the patients requiring surgery, one for the patients not requiring surgery - most of whom where here with infectious diseases, one for the rich and politically connected (this was by far the most fancy and clean), one for pregnant women and children and a final one which served as a nursing home for dying or untreatable patients. There were a large number of patients and a disproportionate number of doctors. Her host was always quick to impress this fact on her along with pointing out their dwindling supplies. She supposed it was because he thought she had the Firelord's ear. However, she soon realised that the situation was indeed difficult- not just in this hospital, in others as well. There were not enough trained doctors and making more would require an overhaul of the existing system. Nakamura could understand that Firelord Zuko was trying his best and had his hands full, but they did need more doctors and they needed them soon. So when she asked to help out for the day, he happily assigned her to the trauma wing.

Most of the cases she saw in the clinic room were fairly simple, and with waterbending she worked through them quickly. One after another she treated burns, cuts, scrapes, some deeper wounds, some more burns, immersing herself in her work. After finishing more than her share of patients, she moved to the wards to see the more difficult cases.

At fourteen if someone had told her she would come to love healing and in fact be as good as she was now, she would have laughed at them. She'd always fancied herself a warrior. But now, she realised that she had missed this, the quiet concentration that was required, the gentle flow of the water, the smiles and gratitude when patients left cured. The last one perhaps most of all, it gave her the motivation to continue even after she realised she was exhausting herself. A couple of hours later, she decided to take a break, looked up and was startled to see a crowd of people gathered some distance away, watching her enraptured.

Noticing her alarmed expression, they all fell over themselves apologising, praising her, thanking her, all talking over each other. It was quite overwhelming, and she was a little too tired to process it all. The only thing she could truly register was that they were all healthcare workers delighted to meet and observe one of the best doctors in the world at work. They wanted to compare styles of healing, and some firebenders were curious to see if they could learn from her, in a fashion. There was no mention of the words, ‘Avatar’ or 'wife'. It turned out to be one of the best afternoons of her life.

At tea, she and Nakamura discussed their different styles of medicine: the Fire Nation had a wealth of flora which could be used to make an assortment of pastes, poultices, syrups and powders. Some of it she'd read about, but some was very new. She was suggested some books to read to improve her knowledge. Towards the end, Nakamura brought up the topic, "How long will you be here Master Katara?"

"Not sure as yet, but I suppose at least till Zuko feels better," she said, taking a sip of tea. The doctor looked thoughtful. "If I may be so bold, could I request you to come by whenever you can? You could see a few of our patients, it would exponentially reduce our load and maybe you could also take lessons for a few of our firebenders so that we too may learn how to heal using chi. The principle must be the same everywhere, after all. And I'll teach you our version of medicine."

She thought it over, it was too good a proposal to pass up, though it would mean staying for slightly longer than she'd planned. "That sounds perfect!! I'd love to help out!"

He looked relieved when he said, "Well that's settled then."

The next day, she went again, beginning her day with a class of five firebenders to teach healing to. It was slow going but she was hopeful. Towards the end, one of them asked her if they’d get a visit from Avatar Aang anytime soon and she informed them of the latest developments in clipped words. It seemed the news then spread like wildfire because after that, not one soul breathed the word ‘Avatar’ near her again, but she did get a lot of odd looks.

And so it was, that she left everyday with the children, except that where they went to school, she went to the hospital. Her day would begin with teaching healing using chi flow. Their progress was slow and barely noticeable, and it was difficult teaching a waterbending technique to users of the diagonally opposite element, but there was progress and one student almost healed a full cut the other day.

Next she'd see patients in the clinic, then the wards and finally over tea she'd learn a different brand of healing. It was exhausting, all of it, but also rewarding. Those days, she was more excited than the kids to talk about her day. Zuko would listen too when they moved to his chambers for a pot of tea after dinner. These meetings for Katara held a dual purpose- the second being to ensure he didn’t sneak out again. She'd fall asleep as soon as she hit her bed.

This continued for a fortnight, a fortnight in which she felt the most productive she had in a long while. She was learning and teaching at the same time, they were on to something that would change the world, and there were so many new possibilities! She'd never say it out loud, but she was enjoying the love and appreciation she received here as well. As a result, there was now a new idea brewing in her head which sounded exciting but also terrifying. She had to run it by Zuko.

This was how she found herself walking into his office once again, and once again he looked surprised to see her from behind piles of paperwork. Except this time there were no formalities as she let herself in. "I thought you’d be at the hospital-?"

"Took an off-day. Had to speak to you"

His forehead scrunched up, "What about?"

She seated herself at the table, "Do you remember the other day in your room a week ago?"

Zuko first looked startled, then swallowed and then blushed as red as the firelillies outside his window. He let out a strangled "Ye-es?" It took Katara a full minute to realise what had gotten him so flustered. She could feel the heat rising to her cheeks as soon as she did. Still, bravely holding his gaze, she said, "I'm …ahem… talking about the discussion we had about the Northern Water Tribe."

"Oh." And then they were both awkward, looking at different points in the room till she gathered her wits again enough to say, "I have a proposal for you. A way to handle the issue."

This got his attention. Zuko scratched his chin, "I'm listening."
She took a deep breath. Then started. "What they want is your metal for their ships without having to provide anything in exchange. And you feel you don't need anything more from them, definitely nothing that the South can provide as well, that too at a better cost."

Zuko nodded, gesturing for her to go on.

"There is one commodity however that the North does have, that the South still has less of. Fully trained healers. Your healthcare system is overburdened with the large population, and waterbending can work through most injuries and a number of other diseases quite quickly. It can be a barter wherein one batch stays for a few months. We can do a trial run first with a small group. If they want they can learn your medicine and teach the others like I'm doing. I can spearhead this project myself, it will give you more credibility."

There was silence. For a little too long. Katara wondered if he'd shoot down her idea. The thought hadn't occurred to her so far, but now it played havoc in her mind. Did he think she couldn't handle this? Or that it was a terrible idea? Was this actually something she could do? Or was she only useful for playing a supporting role? Was she even a decent healer... and so on her. Her thoughts growing legs and running away from her. 

"That is actually a fantastic solution," Zuko said, finally and Katara looked up sharply at him. He continued, "A sharing of knowledge serves to bring us together and benefits everyone involved. And it is best to have you involved. I'm doing all I can, but there are still so many misconceptions about us. You could draw up the initial draft for the proposal and we'll have a meeting with Ambassador Panuk in..." And he checked the scroll at his right, "Will a week be enough for you?"

"More than." She said grinning widely. Well, it looked like she'd be staying here for the foreseeable future. And it looked exciting.

Notes:

I hope Katara and Aang's arguments feel authentic and true to character. The Katara we see is the one that existed after the comics. She was reduced to trophy wife and I have Thoughts on the subject. In that, this fic has been really cathartic for me so far. I have come up with the Kataang dynamic and its inbuilt problems after reading one too many metas. The Fire Nation's problems in the healthcare set up are directly inspired by my real life experiences as an HCW. As always, let me know how I can improve!

Chapter 8: Swordbending

Summary:

Bumi gets a new teacher and Katara moves ahead with the Project.

Notes:

Thank you all for reading!! I'm actually floored that so many people like this story. Fair warning, this chapter is going to be Anti-Aang, so um, reader discretion advised?

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

As the days would get longer and the temperature warmer, Appa would be spotted in the skies. Everyone who saw him would gather around cheering. Katara would be called from whatever else she was doing and passed from hand to hand to the front of the crowd. Once he’d landed, Aang would leap out, and land on the ice with unnatural grace. He’d kiss Katara to raucous applause and then run up to the kids and pick them up, youngest first, swing them around and show them the gifts he’d brought along. Bumi and Kya got something nice and shiny but it was always Tenzin who was given something extra special, a memento of the Air Nomads, or scrolls or orange robes. He’d also spend the longest time talking to him or teaching him and later on, they also went on 'study trips' every few days, just the two of them. 

She kept thinking that he’d have such holidays with Bumi and Kya too, but he never did. When she finally confronted him, all he had to say was, “They’re not airbenders Katara, why would they be interested in learning about traditions that are of no use to them? You know we only go to the Air Temples so that I can teach him about history.”

“They may not be interested in history and traditions, but they are interested in spending time with their father!”

“They’d just get bored”, was his complaint, but took them the next few times he travelled. Katara came along as well whenever she could. They went to a number of places then, not only the Air Temples but wherever they did go it would end up with Aang teaching Tenzin- the two of them really getting into it while the others had to find a way to entertain themselves. Sometimes they’d see them passing by on gliders and would later find that they'd journeyed to the nearby waterfall. Katara would grow exceptionally frustrated at this because it took away from the whole point. Her elder two would get bored and stick with her or each other and neither would end up bonding with their father.

Soon enough, it was the children who refused to come along, with Kya telling her, “It’s alright Mom. I’d rather stay here and play with Yue. So would Bumi. We don’t have anything to do on those trips anyway.”

Once more, she confronted Aang.

“I always said we’d be learning airbending- these are study tips after all," he replied.

Here, she tried to interrupt him and he continued, "Katara, you know I'd love to spend more time with them too, but this is too important. For once, I have someone to share my culture with. There's so much I want to show and teach. I'm not the last airbender anymore!  And I don't want to screw this up. I spend enough time with them while I’m here. Now please, let’s stop with this nonsense, you know I hate it when we fight.” This way, the trips were restricted to only him and his air bending child. Even though most times they went to places which Bumi and Kya could have enjoyed and they all knew it. This was because because Tenzin would come bounding back with tales of the incredible beasts he’d seen or the breathtaking views or how kind the people in so-and-so's town were. 

Katara knew that seemingly minor things like these hurt the kids. Earlier they had been confused, when he wouldn’t take them along and the few times Aang left with prior notice, she’d see one of them asking if they could come along on the adventure too. This was always met with a ruffling of hair and a, “We’re not going on an adventure, this is a learning trip. We need to make a Master out of your brother as soon as possible and I don’t want you two to get bored! Maybe next time, when your mother can come too, so that you can spend time with her.”

“But last time you guys went to the Great Divide! We wanted to see it too, why didn’t you take us?”

“That? Oh that was just a detour. Nothing too adventurous. You know how busy I am, with the Avatar stuff and this new problem with the Fire Nation... I’ll take you as soon as I get free.”

Later this turned to anger.

“Ugh, an ice festival again? How interesting.” Bumi said, rolling his eyes as Katara tried her best and took all three of them to see the yearly ice festival. “Why is everything here about ice and snow and water? It’s so stupid!” Bumi whined.

“I don’t know, Bumi. It sounds cool to me! Waterbending is so magical, wish I could waterbend,” Tenzin said dreamily and Katara beamed.

Noticing this reaction, Kya laughed scornfully, “Oh you want to waterbend too now? Ask the Spirits for earth and fire too while you’re at it! Might as well become the next Avatar.” 

“Kya don’t be mean to your brother!” Katara reprimanded, and it was the girl’s turn to roll her eyes as Tenzin looked down at the floor. He had at first prided himself that his Dad paid the most attention to him, but he was a sensitive creature and wise beyond his years. He’d stopped gloating a long time back and even tried to include them whenever Aang made plans. But his father, his hero was completely infallible in his eyes and there was no way to dispute the superior logic and reason he put forth.  

Over the years, anger festered into resigned acceptance when Aang reasoned with them over and over again that, “It was airbender training” or “It’s Air Nomad culture and history, and it’s not necessary for you to know it.” Statements like these couldn’t really be argued with, especially by children. She herself always tried to reason with him whenever small upsets happened. Because as she’d learned so many years ago, that the calm and cool gentle coaxing approach worked best on Aang when something was to be explained. He didn't respond well to her flying off in a rage. But it chipped away at her- the bottling up of all her anger. Sometimes she felt it turning into something truly bitter and vile. On these occasions, she’d confront him about how he treated the kids, how he never seemed to stay with them and he'd understand and reassure her, justify his actions and make some small change.

On Bumi's ninth birthday, Aang was missing again with Tenzin in tow, and Bumi asked her quietly, “Why does Dad not love us?”

That finally sent her on the warpath and it was one of the few times she’d truly gone ballistic at Aang. He gave the same explanations and apologies and she understood that the gentle approach was clearly not working. After this, the fights only escalated. 

However, this new approach didn’t seem to work either as he soon began retaliating with the idea that he was the wronged party because she didn’t love him enough to prioritise him over her tribe and the work she did there. That she never wanted to come with him. And every time they fought, he flew off, matter unresolved, sometimes for days on end and she'd have to face judgemental stares and questions. It was all in all a mess. 

The years passed and suddenly her baby Kya was ten. All of them now had children, even Toph, though she wouldn’t say who the fathers were. And it kept growing, the dissatisfaction. With herself, her life, her husband. It came to a head one innocuous day at the beginning of summer.  

Aang had been staying with them as he usually did. A few days back he'd left with Tenzin on vacation and now the cheers and waving at the sky alerted her to his return. Sure enough, there he was- an orange figure gesticulating wildly from Appa’s saddle. She waved back as her Most Powerful and Wonderful Husband jumped out on the ice, beaming. As usual, a crowd gathered to greet him, but this time, she hung back. 

“And now, for the real hero! TENZIN!!” There was a chorus of oohs and aaahs as Aang coaxed a terrified looking Tenzin forward to showcase the good old marble trick. The pride on her husband’s face made her feel warm inside, but it was also tinged with something bitter. She couldn’t remember the last time he’d looked so proud of his other children. Tenzin then proceeded to run straight into his mother’s arms while Aang stayed out awhile, demonstrating airbending to his adoring fans. Katara left, having seen it all before, and he missed her exit.

She found herself dreading lunch. There was a storm coming, the mother in her could sense it, she'd weathered enough of these to know. She just had to find a way to steer through it somehow. Her brother and his family joined them and they all sat down around the table in their home. Aang at the head with Katara to the right and Sokka and Suki to the left. Kya sat next to her mother while Bumi, Tenzin and Yue sat at the other end.

Almost immediately Aang burst out excitedly, “You will not believe what we saw this time! The rainbow koi! How about that! Everyone was saying that they went extinct, but there they were, hiding off this small island in the Eastern Earth Kingdom! They are exactly as I remember them. Huge! And friendly! Tenzin has a way with animals too it seems, they seemed to love him! We rode them for that entire afternoon.”

Yue clapped her hands and asked him to tell her more, Kya leaned forward in her seat clearly waiting for her turn to speak while Bumi just picked at his food. Suki exchanged a look with Katara.

“Their fins glint in the light and throw off rainbows. Much better grip than the elephant koi too! Haha do you remember guys? Best day of Sokka’s life that’s for sure!” Aang looked around expectantly, but it was only Yue who squealed, everyone just looked around expectantly. Katara was surprised, her brother always enjoyed that story, but right now he was just frowning at his food.

Taking advantage of the sudden pall in conversation, Kya nearly leapt off her chair in a bid to get his attention, proudly presenting the bubble of wine she’d managed to raise from her uncle’s cup “Dad, DAD LOOK AT THIS!! Mom taught me, isn’t it so pretty?? I can make it dance too!! ” And she proceeded to twist it into a shape nearly resembling a koi.

“Wow, that’s very nice sweetheart, I think Tenzin can do something similar, can’t you?” Tenzin got to levitating the cup in midair to chase the wine and Kya’s concentration slipped. The wine drenched Sokka who proceeded to let out a very undignified yelp.

“I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry!” Kya managed to squeak out.

 “That’s alright sweetheart, we just need to get you some more practice with mom don’t we?” Aang told her. Kya looked about to cry and not even Sokka could make a comment about Magic Water.

Katara tried to bend all she could of the wine from her brother's clothes as the table went silent again. Clearly trying to defuse the situation, Sokka began a conversation with Aang. Bringing up the recent conflict in the Earth Kingdom, he said “They’re messing with our supply chains. Help them sort their shit out bef- “

“Sokka!!” Suki cried, exasperatedly.

“Sorry, sorry. Forget you heard that word, kids. Back to what I was saying, tell them to sort themselves out, it’s beginning to impact us as well”

“The pirates are giving us a lot of shit,” Bumi parroted. 

“Bumi!!” Katara cried exasperatedly.

 “But that’s what uncle Sokka said that day, Mom!” he replied.

Katara sent Sokka a glare, the one she’d perfected over the years that said ‘you fucking idiot’. Sokka looked sheepish.

Aang stepped in, barely holding in his laughter, “Aah don’t worry about that. Kuei has agreed to send some troops. Which reminds me, I-“

“Why didn’t you take me and Kya with you Dad?” Bumi interjected.

A very pregnant pause.

“We’ve already talked about this, Bumi. These are airbending lessons, you are a non-bender”, Aang explained, slowly as though he were talking to a 6 year old not his 12 year old son, mature beyond his years.

“We could have still ridden the koi!”

Aang frowned “Oh yeah, huh. But it was after the lesson, you'd have gotten bored in that time. Oh well, next time definitely.”

But Katara knew, and so did everyone else in the room that this promised next time, like all the next times before it, wouldn’t come. Bumi looked like a kicked puppy, Kya looked teary, Tenzin was confused.

Aang continued, “So as I was saying, I have great news! With Zuko and Kuei’s help, Air Temple Island is nearly ready! Which means we will all be moving next summer!”

Shocked silence.

 Then Bumi, always the quickest to catch up said, “We’ll be leaving home?”

“Well yes, but we’ll make a new home! What do you think, Katara? All polished and new for you. You'll have waterbenders in Republic City to work with too!”

She knew that this had been coming up sometime in the future. He’d mentioned it in passing. But they’d never really discussed it. The implications of such a move. They had children for La’s sake and only one of them could air bend. They couldn't move to the air temple where air bending was absolutely necessary to move around freely.

She felt like crying and the only reply possible at that moment was a garbled “That sounds very nice, sweety."

 Suki shared a look with Sokka and declared with finality, “The kids can all sleep over at our place. Yue dragged home another stray and as much as I want the poop monster out, it is cute. I guess they’ll love it.”

As the rest of dinner passed in small talk decidedly away from any and all koi topics, Katara understood again that there was a storm coming and this time she did not feel like holding back.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

"Well if it isn't Master Katara of the Southern Water Tribe! I did not expect to see you here!" Ambassador Panuk's voice boomed as soon as he entered the room and had dispensed with the formality of bowing to the Firelord. They were seated in one of the smaller meeting halls in the office complex. 

"It's good to meet you again, Ambassador. Do you miss your friends at the South now that you're posted here?" she asked, smiling back as they gripped each other's forearms with more violence than necessary.

"Oh yes of course, I particularly miss the times when we had ...uh differences of opinion. Some of our altercations were... quite lively. But enough about me, tell me, what business does the Avatar's Wife have in The Caldera?" He asked, settling down and making himself comfortable and thereby missing the way Katara stiffened and Zuko's blank face twisted into a scowl. 

You are my forever girl.

But before Zuko could say anything, she corrected the odious man herself. "I'd prefer if you stuck to Master Katara, Ambassador. We've had this conversation before, it is what you'd call a man of my talents after all. And it's ex-wife now, I thought everyone knew already." 

Though she'd said this quite amicably, the tribesman paled and stared at her wide eyed, "I'd heard rumours, but..." 

"I believe this conversation is neither here nor there." Zuko snapped. "Ambassador, I called you here to discuss your communique regarding metal trade and Master Katara is here because she has some valuable input on the subject. So if we may begin?"

Katara took her seat to Zuko's right and Panuk struggled to school his expressions. The meeting was not off to a strong start. Fingers steepled in front of himself, Zuko started " You have requested 300 tonnes of metal as further war reparations. I have two primary issues with this. First, although I deeply regret the hurt that has been inflicted on your people by the actions of past rulers and military commanders, we have deliberated on this subject at length already in the Ba Sing Se Summit. The Fire Nation has apologised and given remuneration. By asking us for more, you imply that you do not trust us and the New Peace. Is that what this is about, Ambassador?" 

"Absolutely not, Firelord Zuko. We do trust you and treasure our partnership and the New Peace. But you must realise, the lives destroyed, our very own princess dead, all for your Navy's glory. You yourself kidnapped the Avatar- it's not something that's easily forgotten. We need to defend ourselves better from outside forces now, which is why we ask for the metal." 

Katara could identify the beginnings of a guilt trip and before it could begin true and proper, Katara interjected, "Ambassador, forgive me for interrupting, but you'll realise that the Fire Nation did their fair share of damage to the South as well, but we would rather accept the terms of the Summit and foster better cooperation with them than keep bringing up the painful past especially when Firelord Zuko has taken such efforts in international cooperation." 

"Well Master Katara , we can't all be blessed with friends in high up places, can we, to foster better cooperation, " he sneered and she saw Zuko clench his fists under the table. She shot him a look, begging him to calm down, which she could only hope he understood. She herself was fairly calm since she'd dealt with this enough. 

Zuko apparently did understand and ploughed on through gritted teeth, "The second issue I have is that even with the raw material, you simply do not have skilled labour necessary to actually build ships the right way." 

"The Earth Kingdom are our allies -"

"They are also at least 20 years behind us in terms of shipbuilding and other technology"

Panuk was silent for a while and Katara took this as her opportunity to begin. "Luckily, we have thought of a solution that will benefit all parties involved." 

"Oh you have? And are we going to listen to these people who lived in ice huts till what? 5 years ago?" He asked Zuko.

"Yes, we are. Master Katara, knows her stuff and has the requisite experience. She has come up with quite the solution.” Turning to her, he said, “Master Katara if you will?" 

Katara unrolled the scroll before her and started her presentation.

"The Northern Water Tribe needs raw material and skilled labour to build its navy. Both things which the Fire Nation can provide. For 100 tonnes of metal and twenty engineers and architects who will oversee and coordinate the project, they request 200 of your trained healers. They will be posted in cities and some of the larger towns and for a few months at a stretch on rotation. We will begin with a trial period of ten and if it's successful, we shall continue with the project. You will find that a sharing of knowledge is in the spirit of the New Peace and the strengthening of ties. As a Water Tribe healer who has worked in the hospital here, I will oversee the whole project and ensure their safety as I hope you will ensure the safety of those that will be sent to the North. If any member of either side has any cause to be distressed, there will be repercussions for the other side. What say, Ambassador?" 

Ambassador Panuk it turned out, had a lot to say. Some of it was questioning Katara's ability snidely- here Zuko would enlist all her qualifications. Some directed at the untrustworthiness of the Fire Nation - here Katara would mention all that Zuko had achieved in his reign. Eventually he had to admit defeat when faced with a combined force of Katara's persuasion and Zuko's outright support.The Northern Tribe would consider and get back to them.

"That went about as well as can be expected." Katara said as she collapsed in her chair.

"That went well? The things he was saying to you..." Zuko began, concern on his features.

"Oh that. I've gotten used to it. And it wasn't anything worse than what he was saying to you." He looked over at her, "I will never understand how some things work in the tribes" he said, removing his headpiece and shaking out his hair. It fell like a sheet, obscuring his face from view. 

"What would you know?" She asked, affronted.

"It's not regular or anything, but Suki writes to me. She was the head of my personal guard, you know. And Sokka talks way too much when drunk."

Katara sighed. "I don't even want to know what he's told you. Panuk will come around, don't worry." She said, getting up. Then, just as she was stepping out, she called out, "Don't be late for dinner. And thank you for having my back."

"Thank you for having mine," was what she got in response. 

 

That evening, dinner was an exciting affair- letters had arrived once again from the South and everyone was reading theirs over and over again. Uncle Iroh had also written that he was on his way to visit, having been detained by some business with the Order. 

They were almost done, when Bumi, who'd been silent almost throughout, asked Zuko out of the blue,  "Uncle Sokka wants to know if I've seen your twin swords yet. What does he mean? I didn't know you were good with swords, you have no need to be!" 

"Ehh... It's not exactly come up in conversation," He shrugged. "I did learn since I was 8. Uncle asked his friend to teach me." Katara looked up sharply. She could guess what was coming and she willed Zuko to react appropriately, for her son's sake. 

However, the topic changed without Bumi asking his question. Katara wondered at that, should she ask on his behalf? She'd have to do it later, when it was just the two of them -

"Can you... Can you teach me? To wield swords, I mean." Bumi asked suddenly, softly and cautiously, shrinking in his seat as he did. 

Zuko looked surprised at the sudden change in attitude. " Why not? I'd love to!" He replied, without missing a beat. "I didn't think you'd be interested! Let's start tomorrow itself, maybe in the evenings?"

Bumi hastily nodded, "Whenever you want Uncle Zuko, whenever." 

"That's decided then. Anyone else wants to learn?" Both Kya and Tenzin politely declined and Bumi looked relieved. 

 

They met by the training grounds the next evening and she saw him without all his regalia for once. The shoulder plates, the heavy gold belt, the multiple layers were all gone. His hair was tied but without the crown, wearing only a loose tunic and two wooden swords. Katara was immediately reminded of the Western Air Temple when he'd joined them in similar clothes. She herself was in her simple blue kuspuk, hair tied in a loose braid, sitting with Kya on the sidelines in case anyone needed a healer. Bumi, who'd been sitting with them, jumped up immediately the moment he spotted Zuko. Katara suspected that he'd thought Zuko wouldn't turn up.

"Let's get started Uncle Zuko! I can't wait!! I'm going to be all FWOOSH! And SWISH! SLASH! SHWICK! and it's going to be so cool!! Let's go, let's go!!" 

"Calm down." Zuko interjected sternly. "The Way of the Sword requires the greatest focus and discipline. You won't be given a real sword any time soon. We'll start with warm up exercises for balance."

"But Uncle Zuko-"

"No buts! And here you call me Sifu." Katara smothered her laughter at the expression on Bumi's face. It seemed that Kind and Accommodating Zuko had been replaced. By Strict Disciplinarian Zuko. As it was, she enjoyed that session thoroughly. Zuko was completely focused in his new role. 

"No, do it again, slowly. If you wave a real sword around like that, you'd cut off your arm!" 

"HOLD THAT POSE!"

"Better." 

"No, not like that, you're getting ahead of yourself. Raise and balance. Get used to the weight. Thaaat's it."

"Focus, Bumi. You can see the birds after our time's up."

"20 firesquats, NOW!" 

Kya was cowed and Bumi was thrown off. Zuko had never so much as raised his voice in front of them before. But after the initial shock, Bumi recovered and to his credit, tried his best. He cut himself a couple of times (which she used as healing practice for a very meek Kya) but bounded back every time, determination written on his small face. By the end, he was sweaty, sore and completely drained and Katara was really proud of him. He and his new Master bowed to each other and Zuko took both swords, swung them around in a neat arc and easily sheathed them to wide eyed wonder from his young audience.

"Show off" Katara pouted. He smirked at her, sweat glistening on his face and arms. This was extremely distracting for some reason and she stared, mesmerized as a rivulet rolled down corded muscle while he reached for a cloth to wipe it off. She snapped back to reality when she realised he was staring at her, brow furrowed, the picture of confusion. Katara floundered for something to say to him, annoyed at her inability to focus on literally anything else. 

"You were much more difficult with Aang. You’ve grown soft in your old age.." she said, finally. The kids gawped at the idea of Zuko being scarier than he was now. 

"No, I think it's because your son is simply a better student," he said, scratching his chin. "He gets that from you, you know."

Turning to Bumi, he patted his shoulder, "Well done. Very, very good job. You're off to a strong start. Tomorrow, same time?" He asked with a raised eyebrow and the boy nodded eagerly. Once he was gone, her son gave her one of the biggest smiles she'd seen, hands on his waist like he'd just conquered the world. Which lasted all of two seconds before Kya drenched him in water. "Stinky!" She said, nose wrinkled. 

"I'm going to get you for that, you little-"

 

This continued for the next couple of weeks. True to his word, Zuko took Bumi under his wing. Katara knew that he could have passed up the opportunity or appointed a master but there he was, every evening, sparring swords in hand. She could see the hero worship in Bumi's eyes increase every time and hoped for his sake that he wouldn't be let down. 

Tea after dinner had become a regular occurrence. He'd make the tea, she'd pour it out and they'd discuss mundane everyday topics. She’d almost forgotten that the reason she’d proposed these meetings was to keep him from his dangerous nightly activities.

When Zuko was in a Mood, he’d vent about his ministers and his day. He’d get so animated, a far cry from the expressionless facade he put on for the sake of his court and she loved that she was once more part of the few who he let see this side of him. One day he told her:

“Some of these idiots want a statue of Sozin on the anniversary of the Great War, as if that wouldn’t send the worst message ever to the world and completely counteract everything I’ve been trying to achieve and be massively expensive at the same time.”

“Yeah, terrible idea. Counteract with a different offer, maybe a park? Or something else  instead? A celebration?” she suggested.

Another day it was:

“Azula has sent people to spy on me!”

“Are you surprised?” she asked, sipping her tea.

“No” he sighed, “Just irritated.”

The next day it was:

“We’ve just finalized the subsidy system! It will benefit farmers across the nation. Grain and fertilizer at lesser prices, we’ll have more than enough crops to export and it’ll keep the poorer population fed on more than just fish from polluted rivers.”

(She loved these days the best, when he got to passionately talking about his country and his people and the reforms he’d planned.)

Another time it was:

“Our Mayor had smoked opium again before coming in here. It was really obvious. And the worst part is that he holds so much clout, I can’t even get rid of him!”

“Maybe you should try it yourself, might get you to relax,” was her suggestion for the day.

Zuko had winced at that.  

She looked forward to this time of the day, there was such a serenity here. She had no idea how she'd gone so many years without. If only he'd call her Tara again...As it was, Zuko listened to all she had to say. On a few occasions, she even argued with him regarding policy. As a result, she was inadvertently getting very well versed with Fire Nation politics. 

Katara had already been to see the Health Minister, a wizened old woman named Chiyo who'd given her the go ahead for her project, provided she was kept in the loop. The Northern Water Tribe had agreed too and she'd had to suffer through a one on one meeting with Panuk to hammer out the details. 

"You know what his parting words were? That I'm on 'thin ice'" she said with finger quotes. "What the fuck is that? A threat? A bad joke? There's no coming back from this, I'll never be able to take him seriously now." Zuko barked out a laugh at this and she continued, "Anyhow, the first batch of healers are now on their way..." 

 During one such tea, she asked Zuko point blanc how serious he was about teaching Bumi and for how long. It had been on her mind for a while and she just had to clear some things up. "I am completely serious about teaching Bumi! Why wouldn't I be? At least till however long he wants to stay here and learn. I do actually like the little guy you know. And since Izumi has decided on Mai's knives, I have no one else to mentor. Have I done anything to make you doubt me?" He asked, clearly confused. When she didn't say anything, he waited for her to speak. 

"He looks up to you." She said quietly, staring at the floor.

He snorted, "A bad idea for very many reasons, but which one are you thinking of right now?" She stayed silent and he must've caught on to her mood. 

"Katara -?" 

"Don't let him down." She said, finally looking up to face him. 

His brow furrowed quizzically for a moment before smoothing in understanding. She could see anger and determination glint in his eyes, and wondered for the first time what it was that Sokka had drunkenly rambled to him. Zuko reached out to grasp her hands in his. They were large- completely engulfing hers, sword-calloused, and very warm. She was surprised that it was him initiating contact, but revelled in the feeling. 

 "I won't." 

She gave him a squeeze back, along with a wan smile. "I believe you." It was a while before it occurred to her to let go. 

 

On the tenth day of training, a familiar face popped up. "Kataaaraa!!" There was a body in pink bounding towards her and crushing her in a tight hug before she could truly register what was happening. "It's been so long! Wow you look so pretty!!"

"It sure has, Ty Lee. And you look gorgeous too!! How have you been?" 

"Can't you tell?" She asked, letting go and twirling around, "I've been training my favourite princess! My aura is glowing! Ooh and yours doesn't look bad too. It's this pretty sea green. A little murky though I was expecting much worse you know. I'm glad! I must tell Suki, she has been worried. And look, it's getting clearer! Oh hi, Zuko! Didn't see you there!" 

The session commenced as usual. Ty Lee got talking to Katara about all the gossip she'd missed out on. They were busy planning a shopping trip in the near future, which is why they were all caught off guard when Izumi ran up and tried to chi block Bumi mid- movement. Except that she either wasn't fast enough or had not given enough credit to Bumi's innate spontaneity because even when he was slowly turning limp, he managed to stick out a leg and trip her up before falling on her. Poor Tenzin tried to help them but tripped on Bumi's outstretched arm and fell on them in a heap. Kya laughed so hard she had tears in her eyes and she looked over to see Zuko chuckling too, before hauling up the kids one after another and dusting them off. 

"Tenzin- take care of yourself before helping others, Bumi that was very spontaneous and exactly the instincts a warrior should have, Ty if you will -" he said, placing the limp boy in Katara's lap, "Izumi, great effort. Are you hurt little Wildfire?" And he handed her to Kya, "Try healing her by yourself," he instructed. When Kya nervously shook her head, he insisted, "You can and you will. I have full faith in you." Katara found that she could not look away from the scene unfolding before her.

She was suddenly aware of Bumi calling her, and pulled her attention back to the boy in her arms. "Can you try Ty-?" She asked, turning around only to find the other girl studying her. Feeling slightly self-conscious, she quickly looked away, refocusing her attention on how her daughter was doing. 

One evening, she was late to come to the training grounds. Kya and Tenzin were learning chi blocking with Izumi so it was just her that day. Surprisingly, all seemed to be quiet and on closer inspection, she saw Bumi talking to Zuko. 

"- I firmly believe that you should know how to defend yourself, bender or non-bender. Unfortunate side effect of growing up in war is that I think everyone should know how to fight from a young age. Your mother will disagree ofcourse." He chuckled, "Save their innocence she'll say. But I made sure Izumi started training with knives a year ago and chi blocking two years ago. She's fantastic at it." Katara could hear the pride in his voice even from a distance. 

After a minute's silence, Bumi asked him, "Aren't you upset that she's not a firebender Uncle Zuko?"

Zuko was quick in his reply. "Not at all. She's smart and hard working and fierce and brilliant and everything I could want in my daughter and heir. Who cares if she's not a bender? She's my baby girl and I love her - Bumi? Bumi what's wrong?" It seemed her boy had started sobbing. It was all the more heartwrenching because she'd rarely seen him cry. Katara wanted with all her heart to run to him, but something told her to wait. To let Zuko handle it. And that's what she did, hiding behind the shrubbery. 

"Why doesn't Dad feel the same way? Why doesn't he love us like he does Tenzin?" This caused Zuko to inhale sharply. 

"Fathers love all their kids, I'm sure if you asked Aang-"

"He's never there! He doesn't care!! And Mom knows it too! It's one of the reasons they broke up, I heard her tell Uncle Sokka about it!" 

Katara could feel her knees buckle and she stifled a cry with her hands. 

"Why am I such a failure? Why am I never good enough?" Bumi cried outright.

At this, she saw Zuko hug him tight. There were tears in his own eyes as Bumi sobbed into his shirt and he continued holding him. It took quite a while for him to calm down. 

Finally, Zuko replied in a voice huskier than normal, belying his underlying emotions, "I know you Bumi, you're no failure. You are more than good enough. You have Sokka's penchant for strategy and tactics, your father's fun and impulsive nature and you're as caring, kind and hard working as your mother. You're brilliant Bumi, never forget that." 

Bumi sniffled, and continued staring at the ground. "I'm not an air bender," he replied finally.

For the longest time, Zuko didn't speak. 

"My father gave me this, you know." He said, pointing at his scar. Bumi gasped and looked at him really quickly in shock. "When I was 13, for disobeying him. He always praised my sister and most of my childhood was spent in her shadow, trying to get his praise. Never worked. I was always the inferior one in his eyes. Then I was burned and banished and" here he used finger quotes, "'stripped of my honour'. I spent three years trying to get it back, but all I really wanted was my father's love." 

Bumi was now staring at him, wide eyed. "And though I'm not saying our situations are anywhere similar, I understand you more than you know. It took me a long time to realise that parents are supposed to love their children unconditionally, no matter how much they screw up. That you don't owe them anything. If your father doesn't love you as he should, then it's his loss and his fault Bumi, not yours." 

"Maybe, when you're ready, you can sit and ask him for his reasons, but for now, know that you're loved. Your mom's here for you, so is Sokka, Kya, Tenzin, Izumi and me. You can always count on us."

"Is it unmanly if I cry again, Uncle Zuko?" 

"Of course not! I cry all the time, are you calling me unmanly?" Bumi burrowed his face in Zuko’s tunic once again and shook his head aggressively. Zuko smoothed the back of his head with one hand and wiped his own eyes with the other.  

"It's not my fault that they aren't together anymore, is it Uncle Zuko ?" And Katara could not hold herself any longer. She rushed out and Bumi startled at the sudden movement. Gathering him in her arms she cried out, "No love, it's not. Not at all. And neither is it your fault that your father acted the way he did. It was all his. Believe me, please. I'm terribly sorry if you ever felt that way." 

"I love you Mommy."

"Love you too, my Wolf." 

The next time she looked up, Zuko had walked away and she and her son had a long overdue conversation. 

 

That night, her hands shook as she poured him tea. "Thank you."  

"You have nothing to thank me for. Are you alright?" 

"More than I thought I'd be." She said, through watery eyes and some liquid sloshed out of the cup and on the table. 

"I'm not good at this," Zuko said, fidgeting and looking away from her. "But would you like a hug? Before you waste all the tea?" 

Katara bit her lip and nodded. Through blurry eyes, she saw him getting up and opening his arms, an awkward smile on his face. She set the teapot down with a clatter and blindly rushed into them.

Oh, this was familiar, this was safe.

She closed her eyes and settled into his comforting warmth as he brought his arms up around her. The hurt and distress peeled away in layers as she clung on. Katara could almost imagine that they were back on that Ember Island Pier, surrounded by sea and sunset. Then, her fingers brushed over his longer locks and she was pulled into a more recent memory, of sunrise and red sheets. One of his arms held her to him as the other played with her hair, fingers lightly touching her scalp. She nearly purred. Looking up into molten gold eyes, his face held the softest expression yet. 

"I've got your back", he whispered. This caused her to smile and further burrow her face in him, nose grazing his neck and breath puffing out near the hollow of his throat. She could see him swallow, up close as his arms tightened. Much better, she thought, taking a deep breath, his smell permeating her. Hugs were the best when all you could see and feel and smell was Zuko. There was an idea tingling at the very edges of her consciousness and she was lost in the feeling of never wanting this to end- 

 Aaand he was inhaling sharply and putting some distance between the two of them. 

"Tea's gone cold, I'll make a fresh pot."

She felt giddy for a bit. Reeling from the sudden emptiness, but Zuko had his back to her and she managed to gather herself enough to sit back down. She felt a little bit at a loss of what to say when there was a knock at the door. Zuko looked at her curiously before calling out, "Enter.

A messenger came in, handed him a scroll, bowed and left. Breaking the seal, Zuko read out, "The healers will be here in two days' time." 

Notes:

I hope I haven't done Aang too much of a disservice! He was canonically a bad father (which sucks honestly) and I ran with that. Let me know how the interactions were!! It's my first time with everything, including angst! This chapter was Bumi and Katara centric and I wanted to develop a strong friendship between her and Zuko before romance. But we shall advance a bit more with the slow burn in the next chapter :)
Huge shoutout to my amazing beta @myrsinemezzo !!

Chapter 9: Destiny

Notes:

This will be the big kataang fight. If you wish to avoid it, don't read the parts in italics. Also, I know I promised more on the romance front and I wrote those scenes as well. I really wanted to include them, but decided to keep for later. Booo, I know. But that means the next chapter is already halfway done.
All the usual disclaimers guys.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Katara had looked forward to the day she began her own family for as long as she could remember. Sokka still teased her about her meticulously set up house party games and the dolls that attended them. She had been one of the best at cooking and sewing and the most reliable babysitter all at the age of fourteen. She would make an excellent wife. Everyone knew it and so did she. And then it had happened: she had wed the most desirable bachelor in the world, a tall, handsome and powerful bender. Just as destined.  

Aunt Wu’s prediction rang in her mind. It had formed a habit of doing that these days. And whenever it did, she questioned herself- was this the great romance she was fated for? It all felt hollow now. A blank white emptiness just like the tundras of the south. Sometimes disturbed by a howling storm. She had had quite a few of those too. There was another one going on- unwanted, unavoidable. It raged through her mind, ruffling up thoughts she’d neatly kept suppressed over the years. She could focus on nothing else, certainly not on the bowls she was supposed to be cleaning. Finally Suki grabbed them from her hands and said forcefully,

“Talk to him.”

Katara looked at her sister-in-law and saw understanding and sorrow. “Whatever else happens, we are by your side. Stay strong. You’ll see this through”, Suki told her fiercely. Katara pressed her palms to her eyes for a minute, looking downwards, then nodded.

Soon, everyone else had left, her children staying over at her brother’s place and she felt Aang approach her. “It was nice of them to give us the house for tonight,” he said as she felt his arms come up around her from behind. For a moment, she leaned into his embrace, reveling in the calm before the storm, trying to enjoy what should have been by now familiar and desirable. She found that she couldn’t. Just as he went to nuzzle her neck, she disengaged and turned around to face him, “Aang, stop. We need to talk.”

“About?!” She would have found his befuddled and frustrated expression funny had the situation not been so dire.

“You did not take Bumi and Kya with you. They feel left out and for good reason,” she began, calmly enough.

"Oh, come on! Again?” he asked, gesticulating wildly. “I told you that’s not my fault. We were just going to-"

"Practice airbending- I know, so why can’t you do it here? We already see you sparingly, then you decide to just up and leave for days?"

Aang made a frustrated noise, “Why do you seem to have a problem with everything these days? You know why I can’t stay in one place too long! I’m a Nomad! It’s just not in my blood. I’d take you too, except you never want to come anymore!”

Katara ignored that last part. They’d had the same argument over and over again, and she didn’t want to derail the conversation. "Fine, but then you just had to go and see the stupid fish by yourself didn't you? Did it not occur to you that the others might want to ride it as well?"

"It was a spur of the moment plan!" 

"Why are ALL your plans spur of the moment? Don't you even consider Bumi and Kya? Sometimes, I wonder if you even care about them," she demanded, hands on hips.

"That isn’t fair, Katara. Of course I care. Alright, alright. Next vacation, that’s what we’ll do. I'll take them as well so that they can get bored and come back and say they don't want to come along,” he continued in a monotone. “And honestly, why would they?" 

"They're your children as well! They need to spend time with you and understand their traditions whether or not they show interest right now! And do you mean to say that Tenzin will know none of my world? Is that how it is?" She could feel herself getting worked up, but for once did nothing to quell the feeling. She had been calm, quiet, accommodating for long enough. Now it was time to rage. 

"Katara, please understand, there are no more Air Nomads left except the two of us -"

"I DON'T CARE. He's my son too. He WILL wear water tribe colours, he will learn our stories, he will eat our food unless he CHOOSES not to." She shook her head when he tried to interrupt her. “It always comes back to YOUR CULTURE, doesn’t it? Does my culture mean anything to you? The Water Tribes value family beyond all else. Have you ever come to the communal gatherings in the winter? Where we tell our stories? Have you gone on a hunt with the men? Have you taken our children fishing? They ARE half water tribe, you know! And honestly, Kya and I are the last true Southern Waterbenders, as well! I have nothing left of my heritage, no link, no connection. So yes, I too have a duty to my ancestors, but you don’t see me deserting half my family for it!" 

Aang raised his hands in a gesture of surrender and spoke in a placating voice. "Katara, please understand. There are NO other air benders. I have no people, I have to keep our traditions alive all by myself. It’s a heavy burden. Also, this is the first time I’m hearing of this and had NO CLUE that you felt this strongly.”

“You had ‘no clue’? Really? Didn’t you pay attention at all?-”

“Okay, okay. Let’s end this here. I’ll try to do my best in the summers but really, I cannot participate in some of your ... customs." He shuddered slightly. "Anyway, this is getting away from us. If you want me to take them along next time, I will." And then, something seemed to occur to him because his expression changed. "Unlike you, who can never make it anywhere! You accuse me of being a terrible father, but I'M not the one who keeps cancelling every single family holiday because they're 'needed in the healing huts'!"

"There was an emergency! They needed me! Despite what you think, I actually have a purpose here!"

"There are other healers, Katara!! You are not absolutely required here!! Perhaps you should take your own advice and spend time with your family!"

"Like YOU do? All I say is that I can’t make it for longer trips and instead of accommodating me, you keep throwing it in my face? I am always here for the family! Since I was 18! It’s what I do! Do you know the pity I see on everyone’s faces when you go away? 'Oh look, there goes Katara- married but no man to keep her warm in the winters'."

"What has gotten into you lately, Katara? You were never like this! You know why I don’t stay the year round! Honestly, sometimes I find it impossible to believe that you're the same sweet, kind girl who found me all those years ago." 

"You left out the part of HOW I found you, Aang. But I'll remind you- it was because I was so absolutely livid at Sokka that I cracked open an entire iceberg all by myself, at a point in time when I had NO waterbending training. I was always like this Aang. You just never saw it." 

"Oh, I never saw it. Me, your husband of what thirteen years? Let's just go to sleep. I'm tired of this constant bickering."

"Oh, you know me so well? Do you even know the real reason I don't travel with you anymore?" 

"I'm not a mind reader, Katara-"

"DID YOU TRY TO FIND OUT? IT'S BECAUSE I. HATE. BEING. REDUCED. TO. JUST. YOUR. WIFE. AND NOW YOU TELL ME THAT I'M NOT REQUIRED HERE?!! WHERE EXACTLY AM I REQUIRED THEN, DO TELL." There were cracks forming in the ice walls now. Quickly sealing them himself, Aang asked, nearly shaking with anger, "Now you have a problem with being my wife? Was there another outcome you expected when you married ME?"

"Again, you refuse to understand. I am your wife, but that is not ALL I am. I don't like it when people refer to me as such and you should have understood that by now. It just feels like you never really listen to a word I’m saying. And now there’s the air temple issue."

"What I don't understand is why you didn't tell me all this before? How am I supposed to magically know everything? And what air temple issue?" he asked.

"You did not consult me about it. Did you even consider us in your big decision?" Katara scoffed.

"Hey, hey you knew it was getting ready and that we might move. You're actually on the council here. And it's next summer. Gives us all plenty of time," he said, raising his hands in a placating gesture.

"But did you ask me, did you wonder what I'd want in my new home? You just CASUALLY mentioned in passing conversation that we’d all be moving there in a few months' time!"

"Katara, this is getting ridiculous. I have taken care of everything, we just have to go there. And well, a few months is enough time isn't it?"

"You've taken care of everything? What will be my role there? What about my role on the council, my work in the healing huts? What shall I do all day besides cook for you? What about the children? Will they have anyone around their own age? Bumi and Kya aren't air benders, will it be safe for them?" 

"Well, some stuff we'll figure out as it comes. And you know yourself that someone else can do your work for you here, don't worry. You're being a little selfish. Don't you see? What's important is that we'll be together! We love each other, we’ll make it work!"

And that’s when it hit her. It was not a big moment per se. Just another part in their apparently never ending arguments.

“Not enough.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Katara was restless. It was now five months to the day she’d upended her entire life. In the weeks immediately after that, she’d had sleepless night after sleepless night. When sleep did come, it brought with it nightmares.

It had been the worst.

This was with the exception of that fateful night when she’d almost decided to go back home (the night that she couldn’t get out of her mind for so many reasons no matter how she tried). After that, she’d begun her stint at the hospital and quickly found out that if she worked hard enough, she’d just collapse on her bed in a dreamless sleep by the end of the day. Recently, she’d had to stop this too after several complaints about her work schedule.

“You don’t rest for a minute throughout the day. It’s just one thing after another. I understand that you’re enjoying this, but it’s just not healthy!” Zuko told her once.

Katara appeared to look thoughtful, hand rubbing her chin. Then, she asked, “Wait, what’s that I see?” She edged forward, expression searching, “It.. it can’t be…”

Zuko also looked around wildly, trying to find whatever it was she was looking at, “What is it?” he asked.

“Is that… Is that the pot calling the kettle black?” Katara finally asked.

“You work too much, Katara! You need to take care of your own health!” Zuko nearly yelled at her and she giggled at his frustration.

“I’m a healer. I know how-”

“Otherwise, we stop tea at night so you’ll get more time to sleep,” he said with finality. That gave her pause.

“Low blow. I’m disgusted,” she said, crossing her arms in front of her. He just shrugged and started packing up the tea things.

“Fine, FINE! I’ll come home sooner than before. Now give me my tea, server boy!”

At this Zuko gave her a full blown triumphant grin. “Won’t take a minute.” His face was transformed when he smiled. He looked boyish, young and she wished he’d do it more often. Katara vowed to take efforts to see his face light up that way again. As it was, it had distracted her momentarily from the fact that she’d referred to the Palace as home.

She didn’t want to mention to him that she’d rather the exhaustion than the never ending turning of the wheels in her mind. But to her pleasant surprise, she no longer needed to tire herself out, and most nights she had peace- comfortable in the soft bed with blue cottonberry sheets that she’d grown attached to. But then there were some nights when her mind played out that last conversation in her head in an infinite loop. On these occasions, she’d walk around the gardens to clear her head or practice waterbending. Sometimes she had the eerie sensation that she was being watched, but could never pinpoint it. That night was proving to be one of the latter.

It was but expected. She was beginning something new the next day, a large international project and a major step in healthcare. It was exciting, yes, but she was also nervous: about how successful an endeavour it would be and slightly worried about the judgement she’d have to face outright. So far, in the Fire Nation, everyone had given her her space, but these were water tribe women. She just hoped that the prejudices they held against her wouldn’t sour the whole deal. As it was, a lot depended on how the two groups would interact and on Katara herself.  There was no sleep for her and she wandered through the shrubbery, talking to Yue. Sometimes the breeze would ruffle her hair or a beam would caress her face and she’d imagine it was calm, sweet, wise Yue reassuring her. That night too, she was half convinced that there was someone or something nearby but even if they really were there, clearly they meant no harm if they hadn’t acted so far.

The next morning, Zuko came to her chambers with tea and breakfast and bad jokes. After a bit, even Bumi who’d joined them requested him to stop because ‘his brain was melting’ and then countered with bad jokes of his own. She appreciated the distraction, truly, but found herself playing with her hair throughout. After a bit, Kya reached out from her seat and stilled her hands with a smile and a, “It’ll be alright, Mom.”  Before leaving, Tenzin hugged her tightly and all three wished her luck.

 For the first time, she found herself alone with Zuko in her chambers, sunlight and sea breeze painting the room beautiful shades of turquoise blue. She smiled weakly at him, “Let’s go?”

Placing her water bag in its place of honour, she began striding out, when a hand closed around her wrist. She froze. Turning around, she saw a pale hand gripping hers and walked back towards its owner. He didn’t let go of her and she felt her skin tingle and burn with his touch.

It was just Zuko, what was happening? Was this a firebender thing?

Looking up at his face in the morning sunlight, she couldn’t help but notice that he looked handsome and more regal than ever: with that sharp jawline and sharp cheekbones. Except for his eyes. His eyes were soft and kind and worried and shined with shades of gold and ochre so that when he spoke, a nervous smile on his face, it took her a moment to come back to reality.

“I don’t understand why you’re this worried, Katara. Don’t you see? I couldn’t find a better leader for this project if I tried. I’ve seen you work and arrange everything. It’ll all be fine. Not that it needs to be said, but I’m with you in this. Whatever you need.”

Walking even closer to him, she held his gaze, the first hint of a smile on her face. “That was what I needed, Zuko. Thank You.” She closed the remaining distance between them, rising up on her tip-toes to kiss his unscarred cheek lightly. She lingered for a moment longer and breathed in deeply realising that her earlier statement was a bit of a half-truth. This was what she had truly needed.  Placing her other hand on his shoulder for support, she leaned on him slightly, eyes closed, revelling in his smell and feel and warmth for a bit, sunlight hitting her face. She allowed herself this-this moment of peace before letting go. Things could go pretty badly that day and she’d lost count of the number of terrible scenarios that had run through her mind the previous evening. She needed this- this calm before a possible storm. It was not the most comfortable with Zuko wearing all his regalia with the metal rimmed pads and everything, but she didn’t mind. Maybe she’d do this later when they were off... Katara dragged herself back to the moment - the last thing she needed was for him to take her for some creep sniffing at him.

Zuko’s face had gone curiously pink and he looked down, rubbing the back of his head. “Uh yeah… Shall we, Master Katara?” Then, realising that he was still holding on to her wrist, turned a darker shade of pink, letting it go. Katara giggled, but didn’t tease him. As it was, her hand was still tingling from where he’d held it.

“We shall.” And they made their way to the docks, side by side.

As the ship pulled up, the first healers walked out on the pier, nervous and defensive. Katara greeted them followed by Zuko: the ten brave women who'd volunteered to step into what they probably still considered enemy territory. He thanked them and praised them and assured them of their safety and comfort and with a last lingering smile and touch to Katara’s arm, walked away with his retinue. She saw the women tracing his path and then turning their sights to her. There was some judgement in their eyes, but more than that was genuine curiosity. She smiled back and started the walk back to their accommodation, showing them some of the city in the process. She’d figured the palanquins would only serve to make them more uncomfortable.

They were all housed in one of the guest wings and she herself gave them a tour of the place. This was partly because she wanted to see their expressions of wonder first hand and also to get to know them better. Though they all seemed to love their quarters and thanked her profusely, they were mostly apprehensive and didn’t speak much around her, even at dinner when they all ate the Water Tribe food she’d carefully instructed the cooks to make. Her children joined and helped defuse the awkward silences. After a day of rest, they were introduced to their workplace and their jobs. 

Katara was nervous, she didn't know how the two groups of people would interact. On the first day, she gathered all parties involved, the healers and all the main senior hospital staff. Standing on a dais alongside Doctor Nakamura, she began:

“A very good morning to everyone assembled. Today is a fine day, is it not? A fine day to begin something new, a fine day to make history? Today, the water tribes offer their services to work alongside the Fire Nation away from home for the first time in more than a century.” She took a pause, surveying her audience. Seeing that she had everyone’s attention, she continued. “Our countries have a horrible history, it is true, but today we come together with a shared purpose: healing. And I don’t refer only to patients here. I’m referring to the nasty wounds the war has left on all of us as well. With this endeavour, we try to move ahead and embrace a new world of kindness and togetherness and international cooperation. These ten brave women are talented healers and have left their families for a month’s time to work in this hospital. They will be directly reporting to me, and I request you to cooperate with them and show them some of the wonderful hospitality that I’ve received. They will be posted two each in each of the five wings and shuffled after a week. All parties will do well to remember that they are representing their nations and behave accordingly. Should any issues arise, they are to be brought to me. Thank you for your time.”

There was a round of applause and serious head nodding at this from all the folks wearing red. The women in blue looked various shades of taken aback and awestruck, but immediately followed suit. Then Doctor Nakamura had a short speech of his own, welcoming the healers and thanking them for their services. He bowed to Katara and shook her hand in the traditional Water Tribe way. There was more applause at this.

As everyone began dispersing, Katara walked up to the women, “Any questions, ask them now. We are representing the Tribes in a foreign land here. Their ways are different, no doubt, but you will get used to it in a week or two. I will be teaching a class of fire benders healing using chi in a while, you can help me if you so want, and I will also be learning their way of healing with herbs and pastes in the late afternoon. You can join me there as well. The Northern Tribe needs this deal to work, but so does the Fire Nation. We tribeswomen are proving that we can move on and we can do it with more flair than them. Anyone troubles you or bullies you or puts you down in any way, come to me. Be kind, be good, but also take no shit.  Am I understood?” she asked. And all ten of them nodded back at her seriously with a chorus of “Yes Master”s.

Katara kept her nerves to herself, managing to go about her day as usual. Her class was really coming along and she was really proud of all five of them. If any of the ten would be interested, she could expand it soon. The clinics and ward rounds were also business as usual for her, except that day there seemed to be fewer crowds and more of a managed set up. People nodded to her as she swept past and some approached her with specific medical complaints. As she worked alongside Tapeesa and Yuka in the medicine unit, the staff and older patients greeted her, the friends she’d made stopped for a chat, some invited her over for tea and some asked her for advice. These were commonplace for her, but that day she saw herself through the eyes of the two women. And it struck her, how much had changed in the span of a couple of months. She saw the expressions of confusion melt slowly into reverence and pleasant surprise when most of these people extended the same respect to them.

That evening, she had dinner with the women and it was much less quiet than previously. Still, they wouldn’t include her in their circle but she had broken a barrier, she could feel it. Tea was an unskippable affair with Zuko. She had a lot to tell him about her day and rambled on as he listened. During one point in the evening, after a solid ten minute rant, she asked him nervously, “Are you bored?”

“Nope,” was his ready response. “I love listening to you Tar- Katara.” He blanched, and hurriedly continued with, “Do you want more tea?” But it was too late. She’d heard him. As Zuko quickly changed the subject, Katara hid her face and her disappointment behind her hair.

The next day was the same, and the next and the next. With every day, she grew closer to the women. She found that Tapeesa and Yuka were young widows without children. They weren’t accorded much back home and were enjoying their newfound respect in this strange land. Yue, Yue and Siqiniq were unmarried and quite young but had volunteered in a bid to explore their world before it narrowed down to their home and husband. Uki, Ikiaq and Cupun were old women, set in their ways. They weren’t unhappy in the Fire Nation but they weren’t too impressed either. She felt like they talked about her the most behind her back. Asiaq and Kirima were married, the former happily while the latter- not so much. All the younger women joined her in learning about the medicine here, surprised that some maladies which had been earlier thought as incurable were easily treated here. Tapeesa and Yue volunteered to teach with her as well and her class expanded to fifteen firebenders. If towards the end of the month she saw Tapeesa agree to go out on a date with one of the men, she said nothing about it. Except to Zuko. But that didn't really count. 

The architects who’d gone North had had a more difficult time adjusting to the climate, but had settled in after a bit. The people in charge did want this deal to work badly and had been more than hospitable to the foreigners. The project was a roaring success, and she received letters and flowers every day thanking her. She was already thinking of ways to expand it so that there were healers in all of the Caldera’s hospitals. Maybe they could expand beyond, also? It was an idea. For now, the ten would stay for another few months as ten more healers arrived in a few days.

It was now six months to the day she had upended her life. The hot and humid summer had settled into a cool and pleasant winter, nothing like the snowstorms of the poles. She had not intended to stay for this long, but there was work to be done here as well, and when this project was well on its way, she'd go back. Sokka was adamant that she stay. He said that he had a plan in mind and that she should trust him and remain where she was. They planned on visiting soon, while Uncle was due to arrive the next day. Zuko had assured her many times that she wasn't trespassing and she hoped that her work here was enough for now. The children missed their father, she knew- the youngest more than anything- but she couldn't say the same for herself. They’d had a couple of letters as well, and that day she'd finally received one addressed to her. It felt heavy in her hands like it was dragging her backwards as she wandered the gardens in the stillness of the night.

To read or not to read. 

It had arrived on the dinner table and everyone had looked at her with varied expressions. Bumi and Kya were stony-faced, with Bumi shaking his head slightly at the ground. Tenzin looked hopeful, while Zuko... For once, she'd not been able to get a read on him at all. He'd worn his Politician's Mask. It was like a shutter coming down and blocking anything from being visible. Why her first reaction at that moment had been to reach out to him, to convince him that she wasn't going back, she didn't know. Tea had been a silent and quick affair. And as expected, there had been no sleep that night. 

She was pulled from her thoughts by the same instinct that told her there was someone there.

Watching her. Again.

This time she didn't let it go. It was a full moon night and she was irritated. She focused on where she thought the intruder was and reached out while appearing to study the flowers at her feet. Sure enough, a human being. Blood bending was wrong her ex-husband would say. She was not Hama, he would say. She didn't agree.

In a moment's notice, she lifted her arms and froze the intruder. A strangled cry went up. Pose held, Katara calmly walked up to the man. He was all in black, a bag slung across his shoulders. He was... "Zuko!" she cried.

She released him immediately and he collapsed. "I'd hoped you'd never pull that on me," he said shakily, trying a weak attempt at a laugh. 

"What the fuck are you- You're still sneaking out aren't you?" 

He looked sheepish. "It's what I do when I'm stressed, Katara."

"Can't you deal with it like a normal person?! Take a walk or I don't know, stress eat? You have to go out and put your life on the line, you complete idiot!" 

"Katara-"

"Ugh!" She grunted and stalked away. To her complete annoyance, he got up and easily kept pace with her. "Don't talk to me!" she yelled, still looking straight ahead and trying to outpace him. 

"If that's what you want," he said softly, again easily matching her stride. They both quietly walked on for a few minutes. And Katara kept getting more angry.

"Why are you walking with me now? Go away! You've seen me here many times before haven't you? Ignore me like you did then!"

"I didn't think you'd want to talk to me. It looked like you needed space. But I was worried, so I kept tabs on you."

"Leave then. You've kept your tabs for today!"

"I was in fact just going to approach you today. Thought you'd need someone to talk to."

She just huffed and crossed her arms in front of her and continued striding. He too was quiet for a while. Then he stopped and said, "Katara-"

"WHAT?"

"The fountain's this way." She turned to him, eyes widening. In the soft moonlight, his features were thrown in sharp contrast. Yet she had rarely seen him more vulnerable. He rarely, if ever, acknowledged that summer . The summer in which they’d spent every night side by side on the fountain, talking about anything and everything.

I’m here for you too Tara, if you should ever need me. Now and always.

She debated whether to spite him just for the sake of it, but then decided against it. So she changed her path to stalk ahead on the one he'd pointed out, because dammit she was still angry! 

After a bit she asked him, "Is there anything I can do to stop you from this stupid business of sneaking out?" He shook his head and she snorted derisively. 

"I can look after myself. I promise not to do anything too risky," he claimed.

She wanted to argue that clearly he couldn't with the number of scars on his body, but supposed that was the best deal she could get and moved on to the next question. "What stressed you out today?" She asked, observing his face. He'd been staring straight ahead, but just then, he turned, his eyes shooting towards her and locking there. For a minute she thought he looked sad, like there was something bubbling underneath. But the next, his mask was slammed back on. "Just work, Katara." 

"Liar," she said. 

He gave her a half-smile but looked away. 

They'd reached the fountain by the time he asked, "Did you read it?" She didn't reply. 

"You should," he continued when she finally shook her head. "Maybe at least hear him out?" She was silent. The letter sat heavily in her lap and she half wanted Zuko to burn it to a crisp. Katara sighed. 

"Will you sit with me as I read it?" she asked, uncertainly.

"If you want me to." he answered and with shaky fingers, she broke the seal. 

Dear Katara,

I'm sorry it took me so long to reach out to you. The circumstances of our separation were not great. I'm sorry for leaving, but at the moment I could not stand to stay there. 

Maybe we were too hasty. It was just an argument after all. The children need their father and I need my wife. I still love you, I haven't stopped since I was 12 and I know you love me too. You're my forever girl, Katara. We're meant to be.

 I've screwed up, so let me make it up to you. Now that you have taken a break of months from your work in the South, maybe you can take some more and we'll sort this thing right out. If you want, we'll go somewhere all of us! I will be taking Tenzin for training before, if you don't mind. It has already been too long. Please think it over! I will be reaching the Caldera in two days of you getting this letter, I suppose. 

Love, Aang

Folding it, she handed it to Zuko. "Burn it." He fumbled, dropped it and looked confused. "Burn it, Zuko." She repeated. The letter went up in flames. She spoke only once the charred bits had remained. 

"He wants us to get back together." She said, looking down, uprooting bits of grass. "He never understood. He still hasn't."

"Maybe you should give him a chance to explain, then," Zuko said, sounding nervous. 

"We've had enough explanations and fights. There is nothing more to be said." Shaking her head she continued, "He only mentioned Tenzin. That he'd be taking him for training. Oh, he'll be here in two days, by the way." The silence stretched on for some time.

"Do you want me to leave?" She asked him suddenly. "Because I will if you want me to."

He had the audacity to look amused at this. "Katara, I swear in front of all my forefathers that that is the last thing I want."

"That means nothing, Zuko. Swear on your honour!" she cried out. They both knew his forefathers didn't amount to anything great. And he laughed. "No, Do It!!" She said forcefully. 

"Alright, alright. I swear on my honour." He chuckled and she nodded. Then, she shuffled closer and leaned her head on his shoulder. He pulled his arm around her waist and she snuggled in. His clothes were soft and smelled of sandalwood and sweat. Katara burrowed in and almost immediately felt better, safe. She couldn’t believe it had taken her a month to hug him again like this since the day the new waterbenders got here. Without the frankly uncomfortable shoulder pads blocking the way, she sank into him. He sighed, hand holding on to her even more tightly than before. Mumbling into his shirt she said, "I don't want to leave, either."

"Then don't," he said softly, moving nearer to her.  Up close, she could see him gulp. "Stay. I need you here." At this, she lifted her head to look him in the eyes. That might have been an objectively bad idea because she found that it was difficult to look away. It didn’t help that he wouldn’t turn away either. She could make out the blush on his cheeks in the moonlight and the sincerity and hope in his features.

"You do?" she asked.

"Of course. I love having you around... and you've done so much in such a short period. Commendable." That snapped her out of whatever funk she’d been in. He was her friend who enjoyed her company and was thankful for all she’d done for his country. She looked away, trying to hide the confusion that must be apparent on her face. He must have misread it because he continued hastily with, "That is not to say that you should stay. Or that I'm forcing you to stay. You should make your own choices, I'll support you no matter what. In fact-" 

Katara started laughing. "Oh, Zuko. You are not forcing me into anything. The very idea!" And she laughed some more, head thrown back, holding onto him for support. Every time she sobered, Zuko’s incoherent babbling made its way to the forefront of her mind again and she laughed anew. When it finally died down and she looked back at him, he was staring at her, the softest look in his eyes, a small smile on his face. He looked intoxicated- like he’d just drunk a bottle of the finest red in that minute or so. His eyes were wide and glassy and he had just the smallest smile on his lips. He also looked slightly pleased with himself and wouldn't stop staring at her. She blushed and tucked strands of hair behind both ears. Strange, she mused, looking down at her lap. She thought she’d outgrown the habit. As it was, it only reared its head when she was with someone she-

Katara, darted a look back up at him to find that his expression had  softened some more. 

Clearing her throat, Katara remarked, "I never imagined that I'd be working in the Fire Nation learning and teaching so much. At one point I thought I wouldn't step out of the Tribe."

“Destiny is a funny thing,” Zuko replied. Katara stilled as she was transported across time and space to a night so many moons ago..

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And that’s when it hit her. It was not a big moment per se. Just another part in their apparently never ending arguments.

“Not enough.”

“Katara – what -?”

"That’s what you think of me isn’t it? A glorified follower," she says dazedly.

"What? No, come on Katara, how in the name of all the spirits you came up with that is beyond me."

"Yes, you do… I never know where you’re going to go, what you’re going to do. Just the odd letter from some corner of the world and I’m supposed to sit here waiting for you? Why? So you can disappoint your children again and again?" Somewhere, she realized that there was no going back from this, but at the moment, there was no calm thought in her head. "You leave me hanging here, to keep your house, raise our kids and then wait some more. Tell me, is this meant to be my life? Is this meant to be my destiny?"

"We both need to cool down," he said, turning. "I’m out of here."

"Oh, that’s right. Leave. Run away. That’s all you know how to do right? Run away when the going gets tough. Just like before the comet. Just like you always do-"

"That’s enough!" For a moment, his eyes glowed and Katara panicked. Then he took a deep breath and they returned to grey. "I came here to unwind after all the work I had to do in the last few months, because I AM THE AVATAR AND AN AIR NOMAD. I didn’t ask for it, but this is how things are. I will have to travel and leave. It is my destiny. And Tenzin is the second-to-last Airbender, which means it is up to me to train him. He will play an important part in the future, as a Nomad, not part water tribe- part air nomad, a FULL- FLEDGED AIR NOMAD and that is his destiny-”

“-You don’t get to force him into-”

“It’s not a matter of forcing him into anything! It is his future! Even he knows that and he’s eight, Katara! And you are my wife, and his mother and as such you have an equally important role in the future of the world, and that is your destiny! We all have our parts to play!"

For a moment, she believed him. After all, who was she in front of the world’s last great hope? In the grand scheme of things, there were always those who supported the major players. There was nothing inherently wrong in that. But as soon as the thought flashed through her mind she was immediately repulsed. 

She was no meek supporter. She was no simple wife. She had a role in her own story. She was Katara, the last true Water bender of the Southern Water Tribe, the greatest Waterbender there was, the best healer the tribes had to offer, one of the Avatar's masters and a War Hero. She was her own person. 

And it was then that she knew. 

She didn’t cry. She couldn’t. There was no emotion left in her. There was also no choice. He’d made it himself when he had spoken that last bit.

Unclasping the orange necklace around her neck, she said softly “Don’t you remember what General Iroh used to say? Destiny is a funny thing.”

By the next day, her mother’s old necklace was back in its place of honour, and Aang had flown away. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Katara? Katara? Earth to Katara. Oh good, you’re back.” Zuko peered at her in the darkness, “Are you okay?” 

She gave him a tremulous smile, tears pricking her eyes as she leaned back on her hands to look up at the sky, feeling the wind brush her face. Once again, it felt like Yue was smiling down upon her. She was okay, her children were okay, she had a purpose, she was doing good work, important work, and she had her family and friends.

 “You know what? I think I am.”

Notes:

So that was it! The last flashback! I'm so glad that's done so we can move on with the next phase :)
I'm no meta writer, I can't organise my thoughts well enough, but I'll try to explain my thoughts as best I can. The comics and TLOK stripped Katara of her agency. She went from badass to the Avatar's gf in my opinion so as to satisfy Bryke's Kataang dynamic. My aim was to show how that could have taken place and how she comes out of it. With a little help from Sokka, Zuko and Suki, she manages to become her own self and is now at a good position and maybe ready for something new? (btw the double tuck was shamelessly stolen from Amy in B99 if anyone realized). This was important for me and I couldn't have the relationship between her and Zuko look rushed and forced or God forbid, a rebound. This is my interpretation of Aang is taken from how he's depicted in canon(season 3) and comics (The Promise, Love is a Battlefield). He is considered infallible by everyone and doesn't have a partner to firmly set him right and thus never grows out of his infatuation and as a character. The glaring lack of communication is visible when there is no confrontation post the non-con kiss. Even in the comics, where Aang goes, Katara follows and this just enforces his beliefs that she likes this lifestyle and will continue to support him happily. For me, this is majorly OOC of Katara who has always forged her own path. She is no side character. She is front and center in her story. She is also super considerate and caring and honestly, had Aang on a bit of a pedestal herself (I think she convinced herself early on that Aunt Wu's prophecy referred to him) so it takes her a bit of time to realize it.
Thank you for reading my explanation, I hope you've enjoyed your ride so far! If anyone is reading this story in one go, I'd suggest a halt at this spot (not an original idea, but oh well).
Major, major thanks to the amazing @zutarawasrobbed for hyping me up and suggesting ideas and the altered layout of this chapter (especially loved the 'Not enough' suggestion). And as always, my lovely (and long suffering) beta @myrsinemezzo who keeps my grammar sane and supplements my enthusiasm with hers.
If you don't agree with my take, let me know, but please don't be mean, I'm sensitive and will cry.

Chapter 10: Tea and Turmoil

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Uncle Iroh reached them the very next day. Zuko went to pick him up, but Katara only saw him at swordbending (she hated that she had started calling it that too). He looked older than before, with new wrinkles and an even larger potbelly, but his eyes were sharp as ever with their pronounced smile wrinkles.

“Lady Katara! How lovely to see you again! You look as radiant as the moon lilies themselves!” he said, moving towards her arms outstretched. Behind him, Zuko facepalmed. Katara hugged him back warmly. “It’s wonderful to see you too, General Iroh, we heard you were busy with the White Lotus?”

“Please go back to calling me Uncle again, my dear. This old man would love more family. And all that nasty business is sorted now. It was just some ridiculous infighting. Your brother was instrumental in its quick resolution. He really is one of our better recruits. I see a bright future for him!” he said, nodding his head in approval. “And who might this be? Young Bumi? Bumi the second?”

“I’m Tenzin, Gen… uhh Unc- uhh..” the boy stuttered.

“Oh call him Gramp Gramp, Tenny. He doesn’t bite!” Izumi bellowed from afar, and Uncle laughed. “Gramp Gramp is just fine, young airbender. Where are your brother and sister? I have sweets for all of you!”

“You have WHAT?!” Bumi asked, bounding over.

“BUMI! After practice!” Zuko commanded, holding him by his collar like a kitten-seal. Bumi’s face fell drastically.

“Always so serious, isn’t he?” Iroh mused out loud, coming to sit next to Katara with his unopened box of sweets.

“I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve seen him laugh,” Katara replied, looking fondly at Zuko and he scowled over at the two of them.

“Which reminds me, this time when he was fourteen…” Uncle Iroh began regaling her with stories of Zuko’s teenage and pre-teen years. Soon Izumi, Kya and Tenzin joined in and they made an impromptu picnic of it. Uncle had a lot of stories to tell.

After a while, Zuko’s voice reached them, “Uncle please, let them have a shred of respect left for me by the end of your visit!”

Uncle just laughed his concerns away with a wave of his hand, launching into a fresh tale as Bumi bounded over to them, all pretence of practice gone after the fifth time Zuko told him to do hot squats for not paying attention. Zuko himself came and sat next to her, leaning back on his arms, sweat dripping from his brow. Katara poured him some tea and reached over with a towel to dab off the sweat from his face and neck before handing it to him.

He took it from her, fingers brushing hers and she once again, felt warmth tingling in her hands. It was a pleasant feeling, but strange. She sat on them to stop it, looking up at Zuko through her lashes. His tunic had fallen open at the top and a pale chest was visible with sparse dark hair. It was difficult to look away, truly. But then the spectacle of Bumi imitating Zuko started and she pulled herself together realising that Uncle had gone silent.

He was observing the two of them with interest while the kids carried the conversation. She met his gaze, and he smiled cheekily at her. She blushed a deeper red than the fire lilies.

Afterwards, she walked with Uncle Iroh through the gardens and the two of them got to talking. She told him about Aang. He didn’t pry into her reasons, but seemed to understand all the same. “I had the feeling that he could see right through me,” she later told Zuko that evening by the fountain where they had for once mutually decided to stroll, instead of happening on each other, because she couldn’t sleep.

“That’s Uncle for you,” he replied. “I always told that you were coming to the wrong person for advice.”

“I would prefer my advice without the overextended tea metaphors, thank you very much,” Katara informed him.

The next morning, she told her children the news. “Your father is coming. He wants to meet us and he may ask you to come with him. I will be staying here for a bit with Uncle Zuko, but you are free to decide for yourselves. I’ll support you no matter what.”

She was very uncomfortable about the whole situation and honestly still doubted if she was strong enough to meet him and face the last 13 years head on. It was made worse by the fact that everyone had caught on to what was happening. The maids were told to get a new room ready, the stable boys were getting ready for a large animal and the cooks were told to prepare vegetarian dishes. She could feel the stares on her and locked herself in her room as soon as she could.

It was evening when she heard the cries outside her room. She saw him at dinner. He’d grown a beard.

As she entered, he gave her a tight smile, already seated between Tenzin and Kya. She nodded back and took her spot between Bumi and Iroh. The table was the quietest she had seen it in a long time. All conversation was stilted, even with all of Iroh’s talents. They each talked about what they’d been up to. Aang was jubilant that his kids had followed his example and joined school (“Have you made a noodle portrait of Zuko yet?” Aang had asked and Tenzin had nodded bashfully). He’d heard of Katara’s project and was all praise for it. He himself had been near the Eastern Air Temple, trying to relearn the Guru’s teachings and sort out skirmishes between rival gangs in that area.

“You know what we should do?” he said towards the end, “We should take a family trip somewhere close by tomorrow. Catch up some more. It’ll be fun!”

“Uhh Dad, we have school tomorrow.” Kya said.

“I’m sure they can make an exception for the Avatar’s kids!” Aang said and Katara grit her teeth. “Actually, Dad, they don’t know who we are,” Bumi explained.  “And also, I’d miss swordbending. Uncle Zuko says I’ve gotten really good at it too! He says that we need the utmost discipline and focus to learn it.” This last bit was said with a hint of pride and a hopeful smile.

“Oh, don’t get scared of Zuko. He’s a softie underneath all the scowling.” Aang informed him and Zuko scowled at him.

Bumi corrected himself, “Oh, I’m not scared of him! Not really. I think he’s cool and I… don’t actually wanna miss our lessons,” he said.

Zuko looked oddly touched. “I think you’re pretty cool too, Bumi.”

After this, Aang was more adamant than before and managed to convince all three of them to come with him. Just as they were done and she was getting up, he turned to her and said, “We’ll mostly go to Lapis Lagoon, Katara. Bring along some towels if you can.”

“Aang, I’m not coming tomorrow,” she said, as calmly as she could. The table went deathly silent and she could feel eyes on her.

“Why?” he asked shrilly. “Another day working for you?”

“Come back tomorrow and then we’ll talk about it. Oh, and meanwhile, take Izumi with you.”

“I don’t mean to impose…” The girl started and Katara exited the room as quickly as she could.

“Zuko, come on,” she called as she left and he followed behind her. Once the door to the tea room was safely shut, she started, “That was the most awkward, horrible, tense dinner of my life. How does he still not understand is beyond me.”

“I’ll brew something stronger,” was Zuko’s only reply. Katara was just about to start on a full-fledged rant when the door swung open. Iroh and Aang walked in, the former looking apologetic, while the latter looked determined. What ensued was a tea more awkward than the dinner, and she fled as soon as she could. And though she sorely wanted to, she couldn’t meet up by the fountain because of the irrational fear that Aang would catch her there as he had all those years ago.

So she tried to sleep that night and tried to hide her dark circles the next morning and tried to stay alive throughout the day. News had spread, and she got more people side-eyeing her than usual, which truly didn’t help matters. By the end of the day, short Yue approached her, asking if she wanted to spend the night in their quarters, and she gladly agreed. Cupun made dinner, and no one mentioned marriage or the Avatar.

The next evening, Aang asked if she could take out time the next day. “I can’t. The next batch of healers is due to reach here tomorrow, and I need to receive them.”

“Oh, that’s tomorrow? I’ll come with you!”

No. No, no, no. This was her project. This was her thing. He had no role in it and his presence would be unnecessary and would only result in unnecessary gossip. She was just wondering how to phrase all of this so as to not upset him or make everyone uncomfortable, when Zuko spoke up.

“Actually, Aang, I need your help tomorrow.”

“But-”

“I’m afraid it’s important,” he said in his gravelly voice. Firm, giving no room for questions.

Katara gave him a look of gratitude and he gave her a flicker of a smile in return. That night, he snuck in through her balcony as she was getting ready for bed. The sudden movement startled her, and she nearly attacked him.

“Who- What? Zuko!! You have got to stop doing this, or the next time it’s a real intruder, I’ll assume it’s you!! And how did you get in anyway? The walls and terraces are too steep! Aki said it was “Nearly impossible” and “Stupidly dangerous.”

Zuko just shrugged and said, “We’ve missed tea one too many days in a row," gathering the pot and cups as he did.

It was true, she realised. She’d missed this. The easy camaraderie, the dissecting their respective days and the occasional childhood story. Katara wanted to meet Ursa and Kiyi again, and Zuko promised that the next time he visited, he’d take her as well. And though it was wonderful to have this little bit of peace at the end of her day, she couldn’t help but think that he was distracted. He also kept sneaking glances at her when he thought she wasn’t paying attention. “Is the night gown making me look funny?” she finally asked him. “I thought this is what your women wear to bed. And it is really comfortable…. Is it that bad?”

He spluttered and hastily replied that it wasn’t. “You look lovely, Katara,” he said, before blushing a deep shade of red and muttering something under his breath. It was adorable, if sort of confusing. He was such a gentleman, but really, she didn’t find their situation all that inappropriate for him to have such a reaction. He seemed even more wound up the next night when she wore a red one instead, and she found that mortal danger aside, she liked this setup better than their previous one. In fact, it made up for suffering through those awful dinners where Aang still tried to get her attention.

He stayed the week. Every day he’d try to talk to her and everyday she’d make herself unavailable. At first he even came to Bumi’s training sessions. This was a nuisance for everyone involved because he didn’t agree with Zuko’s style one bit. The third time in a row when he interrupted him to say, “Oh chill out, it’s just a small mistake! You don’t need to punish him for that!” Zuko burst. “He’s my student, Aang. We get along perfectly fine. I’d really appreciate it if you kept the commentary to yourself.” 

“Okay, okay.” Aang replied, hands raised in surrender. But he interjected again, five minutes later when Zuko snapped at Bumi to pay attention. Zuko just pinched the bridge of his nose while Bumi turned around and told him off, “Stop it Dad. You’re interrupting us.”

“Just looking out for you, that’s all,” Aang replied. “There’s no need,” was the stiff response. Towards the end of the lesson, Bumi squealed, “Do a cool trick Uncle Zuko!!” And Zuko complied by swinging his twin swords in front of him in a flurry and then sheathing them in another fluid movement. This got him wide eyed applause from his young ward and in return, Zuko gave him a rare smile and a “You did well today.” 

“That was amazing!! Will you teach me?” Bumi asked him. “Yes. All in good time,” he replied.

Aang, sitting on the sidelines, looked aggravated. “Sitting with us?” He asked him. “Nope, Uncle Zuko says that I have to do my cool down first,” Bumi informed him. Two days more of this and Aang found the timing and venue of these lessons shifted. This was personally vexing for Katara too because now, even she couldn’t attend and supervise them. And if she enjoyed supervising Zuko a bit more than strictly necessary, it was no one’s business but hers.

After successfully avoiding Aang for so long, he finally brought up the elephant-tiger in the room one evening after dinner. “Katara, I need to speak to you.” She realised that there was no escaping this, and no amount of subtle hints would make him go away. And so, she agreed. Zuko let them use one of his smaller offices.

“You know what this is about. And I need to get it off my chest, Katara. Just listen to me, okay? It’s been a couple of months- a bad couple of months. Hopefully you’ve calmed down by now and- and I really think we made a mistake. Splitting up was a bad idea,” he said outright.

“Aang-”

“I need you sweetie-”

“Not your sweetie.”

“-now more than ever. And I love you. I always will. You’re my-”

“No Aang, we can’t keep doing this. My decision was final.”

“But just consider! I know where I messed up! This time will be better. We’ll make it work! You can travel with me and heal people the world over. You can start all the projects you want and -”

“Aang, we had our chance. We tried for thirteen years. I will always treasure those memories, but that’s what they are now- memories. I don’t feel that way about you anymore. I haven’t for some time now.” She said, as gently as she could, averting her eyes. When she looked back, his face was twisted in shock and disappointment.

Finally he said, voice grim, “I never thought of you as a glorified follower. I can’t believe you’d even think that.”

Katara hung her head. “But the fact remains that I always felt side-lined. I just… wasn’t happy Aang. I’m sorry that we have to go over this again, but you need to know. I’m happier now, I think you’d be too. You don’t need me for that, you’re a full and amazing person by yourself. I’m sorry for the stuff I said that evening, and I’m sorry for now. We are over. Really and truly. It's better to accept it as soon as you can.”

He was quiet for a while. Then he asked, “Is it Zuko?”

“What?”

“You love him, don’t you? That has to be one of the reasons. And as soon as you could, you came back here-”

“NO! HE’S JUST A FRIEND. After all he’s done, how dare you-” Katara said, heating up.

“Yes, you’ve always been such good friends and now you have ‘tea’ together every night-” Aang mocked.

“I DO NOT THINK OF ZUKO IN THAT WAY, I – I – I’M NOT INTERESTED IN HIM. THERE’S NOTHING BETWEEN US. I DON’T LOVE HIM.” Her voice had steadily risen in pitch and volume with every word till it reached a terrifying crescendo and the two of them stood in shocked silence for a moment.

Something was twisting and unravelling inside Katara. True, there was nothing between the two of them, she realised, except for the fact that he’d supported her, comforted her, cared for her, made her laugh, given her freedom, made her … happy, when she thought she never would be again. His kind and easy smile from last night floated back to her and she felt a rush of emotion. But her own words reverberated in her ears and Katara folded her arms protectively in front of herself, distraught, trying to untangle this new complicated web. There was a sudden movement and her eyes slid to the door.

There he stood. Zuko.

Tall, rigid, impassive. She wondered what all he’d heard. She tried to catch his eye, to get some reassurance from him, but he didn’t bother looking her way. There was no slight smile on his face now, no kind look in his eyes. “Forgive me, it seems I’d left a scroll here somewhere. I’ll leave.”

“No, Zuko. We’re done here. If I may have a word with you?” Aang asked stiffly. The other man nodded and it was Katara’s turn to wait in the corridor. She again tried to catch his eye as she walked out, but he wasn’t paying attention. Somehow the web in her chest became tighter and began to hurt. She slumped against a wall, trying fruitlessly to hear what was being said inside, but it was no use- the walls were too thick.

A couple of minutes later, Aang stalked out with a, “Tell the children I want to speak with them tomorrow morning. If you can make time for us.” She ignored him and padded up to Zuko, tentatively putting her hand on his arm. He flinched back and she withdrew, shrinking away. “What did he say?” she softly asked.

“Nothing I didn’t already know,” he answered coolly, looking straight ahead and walked away himself. She held herself tighter. There was no tea that night.

The next morning, they had a family meeting. “I’d like you all to come and travel with me for some time. It’s been so long since we’ve truly been together and we can all have fun again, can’t we?” Aang asked them.

“Is mom coming?” Tenzin asked. “No, she is not.” Aang replied grimly.

“Um Dad, I think I’ll stay right here with her. You can go ahead and train Tenzin, I have sword bending here and and I’m helping Uncle Zuko with some stuff.” Bumi said flippantly and sat down. Aang looked distressed.

“I’ll come with you, Dad. I can’t wait to practice air bending again!” Tenzin said, happily. The smile returned to Aang’s face. “That’s wonderful! We can travel all over the world and see all the temples, we’ll make you a master in no time! The next few months are going to be legendary.”

“Wait, wait Dad. I can’t leave for more than two weeks," Tenzin said. "I have school, I’m learning so much!! And we have an exam coming. I have to study for that. Izumi’s helping me.”

“Tenzin, I’m glad you’re enjoying school. I did too, but this is not up for negotiation. You HAVE TO LEARN AIRBENDING.” Aang said and Tenzin shrank back.

Katara tightened her hands into fists. “You are not going to force him into anything. You’re his father, you have a responsibility for his happiness. And he wants to stay here.”

“The kids need their father, you said it yourself.”

“Then they will call him when they do. They are closer to each other than they’ve ever been and just need some more time. We’re all still healing and recovering.” Aang’s face fell, but he still asked Kya what she wanted to do. “I don’t know…” she said, shuffling her feet. “Izumi and I made plans for next weekend and Mom’s here…”

“Come on Kya, it’s just two weeks!” Tenzin pleaded. It would definitely be more than two, they all knew that. It took a bit more convincing, but in the end she said, “Fine, I’ll come with you and Tenny.” And so it was decided. 

 They left that evening, and Katara made a beeline for Zuko’s office. She felt so unbelievably free, she couldn’t wait till tea to meet him. The stress seemed to evaporate like fine mist. Pushing open the doors, she walked in just as Zuko was finishing his sentence.

“- Don’t worry about me. I’ve gotten over it before and I’ll do it again.” He was sitting with his Uncle and the two were sorting through paperwork.

“What have you gotten over?” She asked, picking up one stack of scrolls and sitting between Zuko and Iroh (who also had a stack of scrolls next to him). “What?” Zuko looked panicked. “Uh, you misheard, Katara. I said, I’ve gone over it before and I’ll do it again. New policy that I’m instituting.”

“Oookay?” She didn’t really believe him, but chose to let it go for now. Enough time for nagging later, she decided. 

 Except, there wasn’t. Iroh joined them for tea in the evening as well. He was there that day and the next and even the day after that. It’s not that she didn’t like the old man. She admired and respected him. But as things stood, this was the only time of the day that she got alone with Zuko. She… she had started looking forward to it. The mornings were always busy with meetings, as his guard would inform her. Evenings were spent focusing on Bumi.

She put a valiant effort into not letting her face fall too drastically every time she opened the door to see Iroh there. She didn’t understand why the evenings and and (she was sure) the early mornings weren’t enough. Why did he have to hog her Zuko time? And the worst part was that Zuko didn’t seem to mind at all! He would be at ease as his Uncle made the tea that he used to make and gave lengthy anecdote upon lengthy anecdote. She took to waiting out in the balcony afterwards in her nightgown, wind rustling her hair as her eyes searched for his silhouette. But the only company she got here was Yue’s and she’d wake up the next morning with dark circles under her eyes. Her friends commented on them, and so did Uncle Iroh. She grit her teeth and accepted his offer of a sedative tea. After a few days of this, she started her walks in the garden again, hoping to run into Zuko and even snuck into his room through the secret passageway. He wasn’t there. Neither in the gardens, nor in his rooms and nor in hers with the tea. As more than a week passed, she began getting antsy. She’d try to speak to him any opportunity that she got, to emphasise the need of spending time together, just the two of them, but he was always with others. She saw him every day, talked to him, ate with him, but he seemed to be going further and further out of her reach.

It all came to a head that weekend. The previous evening, she’d taken all the tribeswomen to a local theatre that she’d gone to earlier with the kids. As with all of the Fire Nation, their stories too were different to theirs. They enjoyed the show, laughed and cried with the audience and afterwards went out to eat.  They ordered the least spicy food available, but still found themselves with tears streaming down their eyes. Since there were shops right next to the food stalls, it felt criminal to not visit them. There were people who stopped and stared at them, their different complexions and hair, but a good number came up to the group and her specifically to thank them as well. She had never felt more like a celebrity and the rest too were extremely flattered. All in all it was a lovely evening and they returned very late and she missed tea.

The next morning, she got dressed and marched up to his quarters. It was still fairly early and she wondered if she’d catch him at breakfast. She had so much gossip, this time about Nakamura himself. Zuko would laugh and laugh, won’t that be a sight! She couldn’t wait. 

Outside his chambers, the guards positioned looked distinctly uncomfortable as they denied her entry. “Perhaps now is not the best time, my lady. Lord Zuko might be… busy.”

“What nonsense, Itsu! It’s the weekend, he has only one big meeting today. Besides, it’s only me. I’ve literally seen him at his worst. Relax.”

“My Lady, please-” But she’d already barged right in. Walking through the ante-room, she couldn’t find him anywhere. Maybe he was taking it easy and was just asleep. Oh well, it was late. Time to wake up. She’d never let him forget this. The time she was actually up before him. Throwing open the doors to his bedroom she was greeted by the sight of a half-naked lady pulling on her clothes. 

She was gorgeous- ebony black hair, high cheekbones, doe-like brown eyes and from what she’d seen, well-endowed. Katara’s eyes widened in panic as she realised what the guards had meant when they’d said Zuko was busy. “I’m so sorry!” she squeaked out and turned to leave. Unfortunately, this meant getting an eyeful of Zuko hastily fastening his robes. She immediately rushed out.

There was just so much to process, Zuko had a girlfriend. Zuko had a girlfriend who he’d spent the night with. Zuko, who never opened himself up to anyone, had found a woman; a beautiful woman to be vulnerable with and hadn’t told her. She just couldn’t explain the rage and disappointment welling in her.

“Katara! Katara, wait!!” As if. Ugh, why were these rooms so obscenely big? One couldn’t even storm out in style. “Katara, please, stop!” She heard again.  She grit her teeth and doubled her pace.

“Katara, let me explain!” He said, catching up to her easily on those long legs of his. He took hold of her wrist to halt her and she felt tingles shooting down her arm again. This made her inexplicably angrier. 

“What Zuko? What do you need to explain?” She asked, looking in his eyes. He looked harried, with strands of hair falling out of his top knot. “I’m an adult, I get it. You have a girlfriend. It’s clearly none of my business.”

“It’s not like that!” Zuko beseeched her, hair falling over his face. “She’s… a friend.”

“Oh wow, a friend? I haven’t had friends before Zuko, so do tell me, do you have sex with all of yours?” She asked, voice dripping acid, and he winced, dropping her hand. She was too angry to care. From behind them came a melodious voice, “Oh, so this is Katara!” Katara froze and turned around. “I’ve heard so much about you, darling,” the woman drawled out. “In fact, you’re all our dear Firelord can talk about, especially when-”

“Kuwa-!” Zuko yelped, but the woman just smirked. Meanwhile Katara, replied with a smile pasted on her face, “It’s Master Katara or Lady Katara to you. Can’t say the same, I’m afraid. Though I am pleased to see that you’re dressed.”

The woman let out a peal of laughter. “I’m Kuwa. The Lady of Silk Mulberry Park, blah blah blah. I’ve been friends with Zuko here,” she said walking up to them and trailing a finger down his arm;  Katara froze at the familiarity, “for many years now. We have an arrangement of sorts. Mutually beneficial, I assure you. You’re welcome to join, I would love it! I’m certain Zuko would too.” And here she elbowed him in the ribs. 

“Kuwa, please stop it,” Zuko pleaded.

But Katara wasn’t paying much attention, all her focus on the blooming hickey on the side of his neck that had been exposed by the sliding of his outer robe. Kuwa snickered, “Guess that’s my cue to leave. You two need to sit and have a lengthy conversation. Consider my offer as well, while you’re at it. Till next time, Firelord. If you still want to, that is!” 

The door swung shut and Katara asked, as calmly as she could, “WHAT WAS THAT. WHO WAS THAT WOMAN.”

“She’s a fri-”

“Say she’s a friend one more time, I dare you-”

“Look, I don’t have anything serious with her! I’m not going to marry her. But she is trustworthy and... single. I call on her when I …. Um … need to.” 

“Does she know this? Or does she want power? Don’t you think she’d abuse her position to get more power? What if she gets pregnant?”

“Oh, she definitely abuses her position to get more power. She is a member of nobility after all. As for the rest, she is truly not interested in ruling. She’s happy with her status and her late husband’s money. And don’t worry about the pregnancy part. We have enough safeguards in place.”

“It’s still wrong! And her? REALLY? Izumi needs a good mother. Not her!” Katara said, gesticulating wildly.

“I told you, we’re not serious.” He informed her and she snorted. The hickey was pulling her focus from the conversation and she couldn’t bear to look in the vicinity of his face. 

“We aren’t!” He said forcefully. 

“Sure.”

“Katara, how many times- But why do you care? I’ve been widowed for over ten years, why are you so upset?” He asked defensively.

“Why? WHY AM I UPSET? Why? Why, you ask?” She yelled back. Truth be told, Katara didn’t really know either. “Because you didn’t tell me, that’s why. All this time we’ve been friends and… and I find out now? That you’re seeing someone? Like this? Do I mean nothing to you?” It didn’t matter that she didn’t know her own reasons. What mattered was that she was still seeing red.

“Katara.” She turned her head away. “Katara, please,” he sounded distraught. She looked back at him, and the anguish on his face nearly broke her. “You mean so much to me. So much. I didn’t think this was important. I’m sorry for hurting you.” 

Katara fumed silently. She was still vastly disgruntled and looking back at him meant noticing the love bite again. She stayed quiet, clenching and unclenching her fists.

“Is there anything else that’s troubling you? Why did you come here? Has something happened?” He asked, slightly worried. 

She just bit her lip and shook her head, and meant to stride away. He called after her, sounding desperate now,  “Katara? Katara please, come on. At least tell me why you’re angry!” Halfway out the door, she turned and walked back towards him, face still turned away. “Sit,” she ordered. 

He complied, looking confused but relieved that she’d returned. She bent some water out of a nearby vase and flower, crushing it in the process. Placing it on his neck, she worked on the bruise. “Katara- that tickles!”

“Shh!”

He looked at her with wide, confused eyes as she healed him. It would look bad for him to stride out with such a large hickey, she told herself. At one point, he reached out to grasp her elbow and she shook him off. 

Once she’d made sure that he was presentable, she called out a “You can thank me later,” as she walked out. She did not look back even as the man behind her let out a howl of frustration, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. 

Notes:

That last scene was just a lot of fun. Jealousy sucks irl, but damn if it doesn’t make an interesting read. Don’t be too mad guys 🙈

Edit: I think I should clarify some points which may or may not have come across. Zuko is trying to protect his heart any way he can, because he can sense the beginnings of something and was hopeful that the feelings were reciprocated, but then...It is wrong of him to expect anything from her just yet, but also consider that he’s flawed and the past has been painful for him and he’s being super careful. Also, the night dress thing of the last few days has been a massive turn on and he feels if he can take care of his baser desires, everything else will hopefully sort itself out. But then he says the wrong name during sex. (Did anyone get that part?) Katara too sub consciously realises that there’s something going on on between the two of them, but doesn’t want to confront it, which is why she’s so angry and Zuko is defensive because he knows she’s angry with him and hates it. He can also sense the undercurrent of emotion and does not want her to think that he’s had a gf all this while (and to him as well it feels a tiny bit like cheating). It’s also a rude wake up call for our girl. Next up, conversation and some understanding.

I have so many people to thank! We’re one-third of the way there! Firstly my amazing beta @myrsinemezzo for the grammar lessons and for her feedback. It was to her that I asked, “If Zuko were to have casual relations, would it be one-night-stands or paid women?” And she answered, “Neither. Acquaintances with benefits.” Zuko didn’t really really love Mai for him to stay celibate all these years. And he’s an emperor as well as a man with needs, this made the most sense.
Also @zutarawasrobbed for giving me some great ideas for the kataang scenes in this chapter as well. And for Gramp Gramp
And my lovely, lovely Internet friend @risemaclay on Tumblr who made me some lovely fanart for this fic of mine. Absolutely the best.
If you want, say hi to me on Tumblr! I’m @that-turtleduck. Please tell me how to include links in my description as well.

 

I will be going back and editing my pre beta-ed parts in the next few days so there might be minor changes (ngl it’s difficult making myself read my earlier work).

Chapter 11: Turtleducks

Notes:

I had a lot of fun reading the comments for the previous chapter!! Some of you were outraged for Zuko and some for Katara. I edited an Author's Note later on, but for those of you who didn't catch that, I'll add it here as well, before we enter the next one.
Zuko, in the previous chapter decided to put some distance between him and Katara to protect himself from getting hurt when she inevitably goes away. He can sense the beginnings of something and was hopeful that the feelings were reciprocated, but the overheard conversation and Aang's words remind him of their situation. It is wrong of him to expect anything from her just yet, but also consider that he’s flawed and the past has been painful for him and he’s being super careful. Also, the night dress thing of the last few days had been a massive turn on and he feels that if he can take care of his physical desires, everything else will hopefully sort itself out. But then he says the wrong name during sex. (Did anyone get that part?) Katara too sub consciously realises that there’s something going on between the two of them, but doesn’t want to confront it, which is why she’s so angry and confused and angry because she's confused. Zuko is defensive because he knows she’s angry with him and hates it. He can also sense the undercurrent of emotion and does not want her to think that he’s had a gf all this while (and to him as well it feels a tiny bit like cheating). It’s also a rude wake up call for our girl. Let's all remember that she has a heck of a temper when crossed. And she's obstinate as hell. And right now, she's angry AND confused.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

After that incident, Katara stopped seeking Zuko out. She skipped their tea (anyway, he had his Uncle to keep him company now), she brought her work along with her in the evening training sessions so that she wouldn’t have to pay any more attention than absolutely necessary. She went out for as many dinners with her friends at the hospital and the Palace as she could. The attention and love she got was addictive- from the men and the women. After the first day of confusion, and another few of inaction, Zuko seemed to get a move on. This time, it was he who tried to reach out to her. He’d try to engage her in conversation, ask her if she’d like to talk to him, take a walk about the gardens or maybe share some tea. The answer to all of it was always no. So this way, the only time she saw him was when they’d pass each other in hallways and he’d try to meet her eyes. She’d stare straight ahead. One time he’d tried to pull her aside and she’d frozen him solid to the wall with a hissed, “Don’t do that ever again.” He hadn’t. That left a few dinners when he’d try to speak to her. This was always unsuccessful because she was not interested in exchanging words with him of any sort. As a result, these occasions had turned into relatively quiet and morbid affairs.

Truth be told, she was surprising herself with how angry she was. The singular emotion was pulling her through weeks on end. Zuko’s tone of voice seemed to become increasingly despondent with the passage of days, but she held her ground. Instead of him, she found herself spending time with Izumi, who in the absence of waterbending practice with Kya, would learn sewing with Katara.  She found that she liked Izumi. There was no forced conversation and the girl did her own thing, coming up to her with questions and showing off her handiwork. As with her studies, this too was done with the utmost focus and Katara was impressed. They had a set of clothes ready for all her old dolls soon and would have another with the amount of fabric Iroh continued to supply them with. Instead, Izumi wanted to make her father a scarf for when they inevitably visited the South with Kya, Bumi and Tenzin. It was being made with violet dyes and they were working hard into getting tiny yellow suns embroidered at the edges. To Katara, it felt like another daughter had landed in her lap, as she held her smaller hands and guided them patiently. But unlike her failed attempts at mothering Toph, Izumi seemed to actually enjoy it when she gave her constructive criticism, and even more when she gave her praise. Then, she’d grin toothily up at her, her spectacles a little lopsided, which made Katara melt. They’d share some chilled sugary tea afterwards that Katara had invented herself out of necessity. It made her miss her other babies that much less.

Noticing her popularity and the success of her project, other Ministers had started coming to her for advice as well. Over the course of months and her discussions with Zuko, she had a good idea about Fire Nation politics and policy, and what she didn’t know, she was taught by those around her. Thus she knew how to formulate her plans and how to lobby for her ideas and with whom. She’d slowly gotten herself involved in a new pipeline for fresh water, cleaning up polluted ponds, fishing rights issues much like the ones she’d helped Sokka with, and Trade. In the last one, her connections with the Beifongs of Gaoling, Kyoshi, the Southern Water Tribe and Old Chief Arnook of the Northern Water Tribe helped. She enjoyed it all immensely. She’d try to find new things to interest her and involve herself in, and had even become good friends with the Minister for Social Welfare. At the moment, the two of them were working on a plan for schools in far flung areas. There was so much to do that she barely had time for anything else as it was. Zuko would sign off on almost anything that she suggested and the stuff that he didn’t, was argued on her part by another minister.

At one dinner, the only time of the day that they truly met anymore, he told her ruefully, “You could just come and talk to me, you know. There’s no need to send those puppets who speak with your words and ideas.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said loftily. “Sure you don’t,” was his surly reply. “I’m just saying, you could come to me directly…” he said, fidgeting a little, uncomfortable with the sudden pall in conversation and the four sets of eyes on him. “I’d, um, like to speak to you about all this.”

“I’m managing fine, thank you,” she said in a voice as cold and brittle as ice.

“Mom, maybe you should talk to him…” was Bumi’s almost suggestion but the sharp glare that Katara sent his way was enough to shut him up entirely.

The rest of dinner went by in the silent scrape of utensil on utensil interrupted by a single long-suffering sigh from Iroh, before Katara strode away to bend under the light of the moon. Same as always, she felt the presence of someone else there, but she ignored it.

That is not to say that she didn’t miss him. She missed him terribly. His shy, gentle smile, the warmth of his eyes, the poor jokes, the heated discussions, the soft and bashful glances, the way he smelled, and oh, when he held her… Just thinking about his hugs made her ache with longing. She missed him so, so much. Enough that it, in fact, fuelled her anger. Why should she miss him at all? When he was right there in her vicinity? Why should she care that he had started looking a little gaunt, that he was not taking care of himself, that she never saw him smiling anymore, that he gave her forlorn snow-puppy eyes, that it gnawed at her heart… She continued with the sedative teas Iroh had taught her to make. The sleep they provided was not as restful or fulfilling, but she knew well what a dangerous monster overthinking could be and planned on avoiding battling it completely. On some mornings, she awoke to dreams of ghost hands caressing her face, fingers pushing hair away from it, lips mumbling painful apologies and desperate requests.

Kya returned a fortnight later. She wouldn’t say it, but there was disappointment written on her face that evening. “Tenzin and Dad are airbending, but he’ll be back in a week or two. I wanted to come back earlier,” she told them all in a monotone. She wasn’t too responsive about the details, and Bumi and Izumi took it upon themselves to change the topic. Later, when Katara followed her daughter back to her room, she asked her, “How was it? Did you have a good time?” Kya sniffled a little, voice wobbling as she said, “Yes.” But then she sniffled some more before hiding her face in her mother’s lap. “He’s trying Mom. I think he is, but he just doesn’t get it. I don’t know why.” They ended up sleeping side by side that night after a lengthy conversation. The next day, she and Izumi skipped school as Katara took them both for a Girls Day at the spa.

A couple of days later, she was studying a proposal for a health camp at the evening training session when she heard voices from behind the bushes. Zuko had slunk off after she’d dismissed all his dismal attempts at conversation, and she heard Kya asking, “Why is my Mom mad at your Dad?”

“I don’t know,” Izumi said. “But I hope it ends soon.”

“You don’t know??” came Bumi’s voice. “Coz I do! I heard the cooks telling Aki and they’d heard it from Reika who heard it from one of the guards and-”

“Get to the point, Bumi!” came two sets of voices.

“Uncle Zuko has a girlfriend and Mom found out and got mad.”

“Why??” came Kya’s voice.

“Dad has a girlfriend? How cool!! I want to meet her!” came Izumi’s. Here, Katara decided that she’d heard enough.

The next day, she decided that she was holding herself back, and when the pretty architect working on the water pipeline flirted with her, she flirted right back. Katara decided that she’d broken so many of the Tribe’s rules already, what was one more? She already knew enough people who had relations outside of marriage in the Fire Nation and so did Tapeesa and Siqniq. And if Zuko could do it, why not her? She was single too. She had a bit of fun with the other woman, before she went back to her hometown a day later. It was an altogether different experience for Katara, who’d only been with one other person her whole life. They didn’t go all the way, however, something that Katara blamed on her high profile divorce. Funnily enough, it had not been large grey eyes that had flashed in her mind at that moment, but golden. There were a few more similar instances after that, before a very nervous doctor asked her out for dinner. She knew him: he was smart, funny, tall and handsome. She agreed and they went out.

She had a good time with Fumio, but still faltered when he called her over to his place and he did not push her. It was difficult getting used to the whole institution of casual sex that was part of the culture here after spending her life in the Tribes and abiding by their outdated customs. Part of her wanted to, but another part of her resisted. And for some reason, every time she considered it, her thoughts slid to a place with red sheets, strong arms and a scarred torso.

They went out twice more. Her missing dinner at this point had become quite a regular occurrence, so no one questioned it.  No one except Zuko. He asked her a few days later, “Will you be joining us this evening, Master Katara?”

“No.”

From afar, Bumi’s voice sang, “Mom’s got a daaate!!!”

She heard Zuko approaching her then, and he asked in a slightly shaky voice, “You… you do?” Katara finally looked up from Sokka’s latest letter. Zuko was trying hard to keep his face expressionless, but she could tell that there was clear distress in his eyes. “Yes,” she simply said. And then on some impulse, “Don’t wait up for me.” She didn’t even know if she’d go ahead with it. Fumio was definitely nice… she just felt nothing special for him. Zuko’s words pulled her out of her thoughts.

“Oh, that’s… That’s good then. Good for you. Ha- have a good time,” he said, trying for a smile that did not reach his eyes. There was pain there calling out to her, and for a moment, she wanted to forget all of it- the anger, the date, the Kuwa, all of the last few weeks in fact, and rush into his arms, hug him tight. But he turned away and she remembered it all.

The date went well, and she went back with him to his place. He was a considerate lover (not that she’d had too many to compare him with). But she found that she was just not in it. It wasn’t something that she could pinpoint. It didn’t help that his black hair reminded her of someone else, that she kept expecting rough skin when she cupped his face, that a pair of golden eyes haunted her. Before even reaching her rooms the next morning, she knew that there wouldn’t be another meeting.

While rushing to Minister Chiyo’s office a bit later, she ran into Zuko. He looked unwell, with deep dark circles under red rimmed eyes. In an instant, she forgot her anger. “Are you alright?” she asked him, worry rising to the forefront of her mind. “Just fine,” he replied with a wan smile.

That evening, Ty Lee sat with her on the sidelines as they watched Izumi train with knives and Bumi with swords. “Kataaraa, what is going on?? Your aura used to be so bright and clean and the prettiest shade of turquoise, now it’s this murky thing like the colour of that polluted pond you’re working on.”

“Gee thanks, Ty Lee.”

“And Zuko’s is even worse. Wow, it seems like his went from rust coloured to brown black overnight. And he’s snapping at everyone and being all grumpy - I’m worried about you two.”

“It’s probably nothing,” Katara said. “Zuko’s got a girlfriend. I’m sure he’s very happy. And I am too. Just peachy.”

“Girlfriend???” Ty Lee nearly shrieked out.

“Not so loud, Ty!! But yeah, I caught him with this woman- Kuwa, Kuma or something.” Katara said, her mouth twisting in distaste.

Ty Lee gave her a keen, assessing look, and was silent for a while, which was highly unlike her. Then she sighed and said, “We tried to get him to date for the looongest time. To see someone, telling him that Izumi would need a mother, someone needs to take the Firelady’s office, blah blah blah. But he flat out refused. He loves Izu more than anything in the world. He wouldn’t risk her happiness by marrying someone who wouldn’t love her right. Some advisors suggested concubines, for more children when he refused to remarry. He got reeaaallly angry at that, I remember. I introduced him to Kuwa two (or is it three?) years ago, she’s one of my school friends-” Katara inhaled sharply. Why was it that everyone else was okay with this woman? “Zuko and her have an arrangement. I don’t think that they’re very close.” Here, Katara snorted derisively. “And honestly, good for him. Sex is fun and I’ve heard stuff about the Tribes, but it’s totally cool if you do it outside marriage here, without it having to mean anything. I think there were a couple of women before her, but now it’s only her. I think he prefers someone he knows and maybe, trusts.”

“She’s… not his girlfriend?”

“Oh, definitely not!” Ty Lee laughed. “She really isn’t interested in him. Trust me, I know these things. Dating Zuko comes with a lot of baggage and it’s just too much effort for her. He calls her when he wants to and she drops by.”

Katara didn’t know what to say to that. Looking up, she found Zuko averting his gaze just as she turned hers towards him. They sat in silence for a while.

“Just out of curiosity, would it be so bad if he did have a girlfriend?” Ty Lee asked her cautiously. Katara was indignant, “I don’t mean offence Ty, but that woman would not be my first candidate for Zuko’s girlfriend. She’s just so… ugh!! I thought he was being… thoughtless.”

“She’s actually a really nice person you know, lots of charity work-” Katara’s expression curdled even further “- but yeah, maybe you’re right. Sooo, you’re okay if he has a girlfriend, you just don’t think that it should be her?”

Katara squirmed. The thought of Zuko with a nameless woman, laughing, sharing moments, sharing a bed did not sit right with her. It made her stomach turn. But that wasn’t something she could explain to her friend. So instead she asked something else that had bugged her. “Aren’t you upset on behalf of Mai? He did love her didn’t he?”

“I… I would like to think that, for both their sakes. She was my best friend. But, at the same time… they just didn’t seem right for each other. I don’t know Katara, you’ll have to ask him this. But she was one of his closest friends too. She’d want him to be happy. As do I.”

They both relapsed into silence again, and Katara watched Zuko carefully guide Bumi through a series of lunges and swings. He looked tired and she clutched her skirts, pride warring with the irrational urge of sitting him down smoothing the stress away from his face. The latter won, and she walked up to him. Zuko looked shocked when she caught his wrist and pulled him aside, with a “Pause, please. medic coming through!” He was still staring at her in awe as she placed both her hands on either side of his head, bringing water to her palms and focusing. She heard a soft sigh and looked back up to see him lean slightly into her right hand, eyes closed. It struck her with full force in that moment, that this was the closest she’d stood to him in the last month. Oh, she’d missed him so much. Standing in front of him, feeling his breath on her forehead, skin beneath hers, she was lost. Almost of its own volition, her thumb caressed his cheek and his eyes fluttered open. There was such an intensity to his expression, sad yet hopeful at the same time, as he looked down at her. Katara’s breath caught. “Zuko…”

“Mom!! What’s taking so long?” Bumi called, and she dropped her hands. “You need to sleep,” she instructed Zuko.

“Katara-” he whispered.

“Later.” He hung his head, disappointment flooding his features for a moment, before he walked away and she went back to her spot on the sidelines.

“Hmm I can totally understand why you’d be so upset at seeing him with someone,” Ty Lee said, almost to herself, “but honestly, I don’t think you have anything to worry about.”

 “What do you mean by that?” she asked her, but Ty Lee just smirked and shook her head. After a while she continued, “He’s been so lonely for so long. It’s just him up there, usually, working himself to an early death. It’s so sad. His aura is supposed to be a very nice gold. Very sparkly and pretty! I’ve seen it before his wedding and when he first held Izumi. Then all that shit happened. He’s always happiest when he’s with his little princess but these days he really looked… cheerful! Happy! His aura had started shining again and everything!! I thought that maybe… he’d found someone,” she said, side-eyeing Katara. “Then a month ago, when Aang dropped by it became gross again. And now it’s just filthy. It cleared a bit right now, though…”

“You’re really perceptive, Ty.”

“I don’t know about that, everyone is always calling me an airhead. And I am! It’s a fun thing to be! But I care about my friends too. Now go and talk to him as soon as you can please, before he makes another adviser cry." Katara nodded, truly glad that she had a girlfriend with her in these times. She had to hang out with her more.

The next day was another weekend and she resolved to find him. It really was just her luck that he was nowhere to be found in the Palace. Slightly frustrated, she walked out onto the grounds and wandered aimlessly. She had no idea she’d say, but figured that it would come to her when she saw him. All she did know was that this could not go on. She was tired. And confused.

She wandered for quite a while and just as she was about to give up, heard voices from behind the shrubbery.

“- That is the mother turtleduck. She is really protective of her babies, so don’t cross her. And those are her chicks. They hatched yesterday.” This was Zuko, with his raspy deep voice and she rushed in his direction. A smaller, thinner one called out, “Have you named them Uncle Zuko?” and she slowed. Tenzin? When had he returned?

“Nope. Not yet. You can if you want to!”

“No, that will be unfair. I’ll name one, and then you, Mom, Izumi, Kya and Bumi can name the others, one each.”

“Well, that’s alright. Izumi and I have already named plenty and the others will get a chance when they sit with me like you have,” Zuko said.

“No, no, it’s unfair, Uncle Zuko. Everyone should be treated equally. You can’t play favourites!”

Zuko was quiet for a while. Then he asked, “Is there something you want to tell me, Tenzin?”

Peering around the fauna, she saw her youngest stroke a turtleduck in his lap absent-mindedly. After a bit he said, “Dad always plays favourites with us. I think it makes Bumi and Kya sad. They used to say some really mean things to me. But they’ve stopped now! But Kya came this time and Dad mostly taught me air bending. He talked to her too, but…. Yeah. I think it made her feel left out. He can water bend too, right? She just wanted to spend time with him. That’s why she came back earlier. Don’t tell anyone I told you. And then I felt really bad. It’s not my fault, is it Uncle Zuko?”

A+ parenting, Aang. Wow.

Meanwhile, Zuko was reassuring Tenzin, “It’s not your fault, little turtleduck.” Tenzin giggled a little at this. “And your secret’s safe with me,” he said seriously as a turtleduck climbed up his arm. “Sometimes, parents aren’t perfect. Nobody is. I’m definitely not. Your Dad should not have acted like that, and maybe next time, you can tell him off. And talk to your sister if you think she’s sad. Sisters usually try to appear brave but they are really mushy inside.”

“When can we meet yours, Uncle Zuko?”

“….. not anytime soon. Why don’t you show me what you’ve learned?”

Tenzin promptly got up, and made a tiny whirlwind around himself before opening his glider and flying around the pond for a bit. Zuko clapped and the child grinned. He was just going to sit when he abruptly stood up again. “Actually, I think I’ll go right away, Uncle Zuko. I hate it when Kya’s annoyed with me. I always end up frozen somewhere. Thank you for the advice!!” Running away, he shouted back, “Keep my secret!”

Katara shook her head in dismay and pondered whether she should go over to Zuko now that he had grain and birds all over him. She didn’t have long to think when Zuko called out, “Do you want to feed them too?”

Stepping out, she asked him, “How did you know I was here?”

“I always know when you’re there.”

That was cryptic, but she took Tenzin’s seat next to him anyway, dipping her feet in the pond. Grasping some seed, she held it out and waited for the birds to trust her. A few moments passed in silence, before she managed, “I need to talk to you.”

“I’m listening,” he said, carefully and without looking at her. She gulped, took a deep breath and began.

“I- I can’t do this Zuko. I don’t know where I stand with you. Am I your friend or am I not? It feels like you’re always pulling away from me. Whenever I think I know you, whenever it feels like I’ve got you, you disappear in a puff of smoke. I don’t want to keep running after you. I don’t like it. What do I do? What do you expect of me?”

“I… don’t understand,” Zuko said softly, brow furrowed as a turtleduck nestled in his unbound hair.

“Why did you stop writing to me?” The words left her mouth before she could stop them. This was apparently not what he’d expected, and he looked at her sharply in surprise. Voice laced with indignation, he cried out, “I never did!”

“Once a month?! Once in two months, really?!! You grew tired of me, just admit it.” Her raised voice was alarming the birds and more of them flocked to Zuko.

“Katara, I wrote to you every week. Every single week. Your replies slowed down and then stopped! And then started again, out of the blue. You grew tired of me !”

“I slowed down with the replies because people started assuming things about us back home!! But I never stopped writing to you! I NEVER grew tired of you! I needed you, Zuko, and you just stopped being there for me,” she cried out, looking straight in his eyes.

“Katara, Katara – is that why you were angry?” he asked her, sounding agonised. “Because I swear, on my honour, my life, anything you want, that I never stopped writing to you. Well I did eventually, when no letters reached me. But I wrote for months and you’d send one for every four letters and I just assumed… I didn’t know…” At this point, he pressed his eyes with his palms, groaning.

Katara felt a bucket of cold water pouring on her head.

“Why have you kept his letters, Katara? His and no one else’s?”

“I know. Or I think I do. Aang was with us whenever your letters decreased in frequency.”

“What, why would he-” Zuko asked.

“I was right, wasn’t I? You two had a thing going on!”

“Nevermind that. He was probably still a little insecure about the whole balcony incident. And the acolytes also kept saying the worst things about us.”

“Destroy them, please. For my sake.”

Katara suddenly had an epiphany. “Is that why you avoided me in the first few days after I returned?” Zuko just looked at her sadly. “Oh, you thought it was just like last time!! When we were kids! You thought that we’d become friends and I’d left you high and dry with no explanations. And then I’d swung by because I had nowhere else to go, barging into your life. Oh, you must have hated me!”

He choked there, “I’ve never hated you, Katara. I never could.” She looked at him with wide eyes. “Surely, when we were on opposite sides of the war…” He just shook his head, looking away.

“Why didn’t you tell me about Kuma?” She asked, finally reaching the heart of the matter.

“Kuwa-”

“Whatever. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t know that there was anything to tell,” he said, still confused. “I don’t care for her in that way. And she doesn’t for me. I hadn’t met her for months before that day and I don’t think I will meet her again.”

“I thought you were risking Izumi by marrying-”

“WHOA! Marrying?! Where did you get that idea? And Kuwa, really? Come on Katara!” he said vehemently and the beast in her chest that had been baying for blood all these days, calmed down, tail between its legs, inquisitive for once.

“Well I heard you telling Uncle that you’ll ‘get over it’ and then I saw you with her. You can’t blame me for connecting the dots!”

“Oh, Katara…” Zuko groaned, facepalming.

“Soo… you two aren’t a thing?” she asked. Some of the turtleducks had decided to brave her lap and one had made itself very cosy there.

“I haven’t had a ‘thing’-” he said with air quotes, “- with anyone since Mai. I won’t do it. Marry some noblewoman who is only after power and watch as she tries to push my daughter aside. And besides,” he said, giving her an evaluating look, eyebrow raised, “if I’d said I’ll get over her (which I didn’t), doesn’t it mean that I probably will get over her and- maybe, just maybe- won’t marry her?”

“Oh, you know how it is…” Katara mumbled, playing with her hair and looking away as her face heated up, “You’ll deny it, but then the two of you will talk it out, and you’ll realise she loves you too, because how could she not, and then end up together…” Zuko burst out laughing. It was a full bellied laugh, as he leaned back and dislodged three very comfortable turtleducks. It rang in their small enclosure, and she found that she couldn’t look away.

“I’m very happy that Mom’s old collection of romance scrolls are seeing the light of day again Katara, truly, but I don’t think they’re very realistic,” he said, between snorts. Slowly, Katara started giggling as well. She loved it when he laughed, it was such a lovely sound and it felt like the world shone a little brighter because of it. “You’ve read them too, I’m sure,” she pointed out. “Maaybe?” he replied, beaming.

Katara had started feeling very odd; all light and happy, like she was floating on clouds. Everything was saturated in a warm yellow light. She could feel the horrible deadweight in her stomach disappear. Instead, there were a couple of flutterflies that seemed to be making a home there. But the longer she looked at him, the more she realised how tired he looked. Reaching out, she tucked a strand of jet black hair behind one ear, caressing his cheek. Abruptly, he stopped laughing and she saw his expression soften.

“You’ve not been keeping well. Have you had any sleep?”

“I’ve had enough,” he replied. She huffed.

“Zuko, that’s not okay. How many times do I tell you that whatever you do at night is not worth your well-being. It’s dangerous, you could get seriously injured, and now look, you’re tired all the time. Seven hours of sleep are absolutely necessary…” she continued. It was imperative he got it all through his thick skull, but midway through she caught him staring at her, with what she could only call the fondest, softest look she’d seen so far, eyes sparkling and a slight smile on his face.

“What are you looking at me like that for?” she asked, heat rising to her cheeks. That seemed to snap him out, and he blushed like a boy caught doing mischief, rubbing the back of his head. “Nothing, it’s nothing,” he hastily replied.

“Did you catch a word I said?” she asked, and he looked embarrassed. Sighing, she said, “Nevermind.” They sat like that for a few minutes. She could see him sneaking glances at her through the corners of her eyes. After a bit, he seemed to pluck up the courage to ask nervously, “Are you angry still?” She shook her head. “Not anymore. Friends again?” she asked him softly.

 “If that’s what you want.”

“What do you mean?” she asked, confused.

“I’d like to stay in your life Ta- Katara, however you’ll have me. Just… just don’t stop talking to me, like that again without explanations. Be angry, rage at me, give me a chance to clear the air, Agni knows I have my faults, but don’t shut me out. I don’t think I could take it. I wasn’t lying when I said I needed you.”

“Zuko…” she said, softly. He was fidgeting now, but seemed determined to say his bit. “I thought that...”

“You thought what?” she asked

“I thought you’d leave. Again. I really didn’t know what to do with myself.”

She was getting teary now. In a wobbly voice, she asked him, “Do you want me to leave?”

He shook his head. “Stay here, stay with us,” he said, painful honesty on his face as he pleaded with his eyes. It was the most vulnerable she’d seen him.

“Then I’m not going anywhere anytime soon,” she said firmly, grasping his hand. He smiled widely then, grasping hers in return. They sat like that, hand in hand and she wondered how this had happened. She had never imagined she’d be here for this long. It had been more than six months in the Fire Nation, and the occasional bout of homesickness aside, she really did not want to go back any time soon. A part of her wondered how much of that was due to the man sitting next to her.

After a while, he commented, “Well that’s good, because I had an idea.” Katara perked up at this. “Sokka sent me a letter, telling me that Ambassador Tulimak was retiring.” Ambassador Tulimak was the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador to the Fire Nation. Katara was surprised. An odious man, he was as cunning as they made them. It seemed unlikely that he’d just leave his position.

Zuko continued, “The position has opened up now and you were my first choice. You know both places, peoples and your work is fantastic. You're so passionate and driven and you’ve done so much already. In fact, you’re better than most of my ministers and advisers, and there is no one I’d rather ask. Sokka probably thinks the same.” Katara was struck speechless. Misinterpreting the silence, Zuko stumbled on his words, “You would have to keep travelling between the Southern Water Tribe and the Fire Nation and stay here for long stretches, maybe the next few months at least. It’s a lot of thankless work, and I’d understand if you don’t want to do it and-” He didn’t get the rest of what he was saying out, because Katara lunged at him. Dislodging several turtleducks, she wrapped her arms around him, clutching at the fabric of his robes and muffling her face in his front. He held the back of her head and her back as he supported her in her sideways hug, chin atop her head. It felt like coming home. The familiar warmth of him enveloped her and she drew closer to him, almost sitting in his lap. Everything else melted away, and it was just the two of them, holding on to each other like their lives depended on it. 

“I missed you,” he whispered softly, stroking her head.

“I missed you too, like you wouldn’t believe” she whispered back, the words grazing his neck and he shivered. She felt his heart gallop faster to match hers and she pulled impossibly closer, inhaling the scent of sandalwood and woodsmoke that had quickly become her favourite. She found herself enjoying this small bit of peace that she’d got after so long. He let her go after a while and she reluctantly disengaged.

“So… Ambassador Katara?” he asked, tentatively.

“Ask me properly, your majesty,” she pouted.

Zuko sighed dramatically, but got up, plucking a nearby Firelily as he did. “Will you please do me and my country the great favour of accepting the title of Ambassador, Master Katara of the Southern Water Tribe?” he asked, offering her the flower.

“Hmm… okay!” she said brightly, taking the flower from him and placing it behind one ear. “Thank you,” he said, bowing deeply and sitting back down next to her. The flower fell out, but before she could right it, a warm hand was tucking it back in, smoothing her hair carefully as it did. It lingered a moment too long against her skin and as the sweet smell filled her senses, she was reminded of a time long past. Katara could feel the odd tingling sensation spread from where he had brushed her face as her face went up in flames. Looking through the corner of her eyes once again, she saw him observing her. She blushed deeper, averting her gaze and double tucking hair behind both her ears. Stop it , she tried to tell herself. Pull yourself together. He reached out to touch her elbow with a “Tar-” 

Katara swivelled to look at him, heart pounding but then they heard a cacophony of voices coming towards them and the moment was lost. Looked like Tenzin had gathered everyone to name the turtleducks. 



Notes:

Long and terribly rambly author's notes:
In defence of Katara's actions, 1) I am of the consensus that she should experience some form of casual dating outside of her two serious relationships in this fic. It's only healthy. Coming from a relatively conservative society myself, it was easy for me to put myself in Katara's shoes and empathise with her internal struggle. I also HC both, her and Zuko as Bi!
2) Katara thought that they might have had something going on. The fact that she could be jealous, that people are thinking that of her, makes her defensive. Was what she did a bit childish? Maybe. But she's just trying to find a bit of happiness too after all.
Zuko put some space between the two of them in earlier chapters, but now that she completely stops talking to him, he realises that this hurts more. He is willing to do anything to come back into her life. Also, I think that the entire staff of the Palace is watching the little royal drama unfold with popcorn and bated breath. But they do love and respect their ruler, so they're rooting for the two of them as well!
Another thing is, I honestly don't know if I can fully hate Aang for his actions. Immature- yes, but how terrible to find out that your s/o keeps their maybe ex's letters safe and looks forward to them. He isn't an idiot either, he figured there had been something between them that summer. Not saying it was all his fault, both K and Z were idiots too, who instead of confronting each other, just assumed things. Also, they each were dealing with shit in their personal lives and what with everyone assuming the nature of their relationship, K also slowed the letters. It was a combination of factors, is what I'm trying (very badly) to say.

Also, guess who wanted to surprise you all with a two chapter update but then the next one decided to take longer than expected? Sigh. But honestly, this one and the next one were supposed to be a combined thing. But I learnt after the chaos of the last chapter that I can't take my fic roadmap that seriously and should treat it more like guidelines than rules. So instead of one monster of a chapter, I've split it in two. I'm really excited for the next one! It'll be up in a couple of days.
Edit: someone pointed out that they have to apologise to each other still, and it’s kinda my fault that I wrote some of their conversation in a later scene, such that when the chapter got spilt, it went in the next one.
Again, I must thank @myrsinemezzo for dealing with all my many insecurities and for her encouragement and @zutara wasrobbed for the think tank that she is.

Chapter 12: Tara

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

That evening, they had a feast in honour of Tenzin’s return and the birthday that they’d missed because he was with Aang. Katara sat next to Zuko as course after course arrived. She giggled at every single one of his jokes and went on about the new health camps that she was launching with the help of the Ministers for Health and Social Welfare when the next batch of healers arrived. Zuko listened to her, smiling and offering advice where needed. At one point, he got some soup on his chin and she reached out and wiped it off herself. Everyone else just sat shell shocked. After the painfully awkward dinners of the last few days, this was a welcome change. Tenzin, who’d never known any different, babbled on about what he’d learned and gradually they eased. Iroh spent most of dinner in silence, choosing to only watch speculatively. He offered to take everyone shopping and they decided on going by the end of the week, Katara with them.

They had tea again that night after ages. Katara walked in the antechamber, fully expecting General Iroh to be there as well, but it was just Zuko, brewing a pot for two. “No Uncle today?” she asked. 

“No. In his words, he’s ‘old and needs his sleep’,” Zuko shrugged.

“Oh, well. That’s old people for you,” Katara answered, feeling her chest swell irrationally with another bubble of happiness. But once he was seated, she told him, feeling a little stab of guilt, “I’ll be honest, a part of the reason I was so mad was because I thought you were ignoring me again.” Zuko froze. “Why would I do that?”

“It was stupid, nevermind,” she said, waving him away. “You’d not seen your uncle in so long and probably just wanted to spend time with him. And I know you can get a little busy, but I thought you were pulling away…” she said, playing with her hair again. “I missed you in the week after Aang left and we didn’t get to spend much time together. I, um, waited for you in my room as well, after tea,” she said, self-consciously. “I just, I mean I just mean to say…” Spirits, what had gotten in her, was Zuko’s nervous bumbling contagious? “I want to apologise for shutting you out. It was petty and I hated it and I just don’t want to do that again.”

“Well I did it first, when you came here, so I probably deserved that,” Zuko said, contemplatively. “I need to apologise as well. I was a complete ass to you. You needed support and friendship and I… Agni, I’m embarrassed to even think of my actions. I was so rude!” he said, looking pained. “I promise from the bottom of my burnt out shell of a heart that I will never shut you out again. That we’ll always meet, just the two of us, at least once a day and talk.”

“‘Burnt out shell of a heart?’” Katara chuckled. “Remind me to catch a play with you one of these days. And I promise as well. No more avoiding each other. We solve our problems like adults.” She then steered the conversation into safer waters, discussing her job and when she’d formally start it. Turned out, there were a number of things to be done before that, including a formal introduction to the Council. Sokka would have to handle things in the South on her behalf, she decided. They discussed politics and council members well into the night. It was slightly awkward with him still, but she believed that they’d be alright.

Just before she left though, she heard Zuko ask, very casually as he put away the tea things, “How was your, uhh, date? You didn’t say.” Memories of that night resurfaced, where in spite of being with one of the most sought after men in the city, she could think of only one person. And that person had not been her date. She blushed a little, saying, “It was fine,” and quickly made her exit. What more could she say? That for more than one occasion that night, she’d imagined him there with her? Yeah, right. She could see how that would go- with him trying to be kind to her or maybe pitying her or maybe he’d be outright disgusted. In any case, she’d just end up breaking this tentative peace they’d built. Behind her, she could hear a grunt of frustration. 

After that, they’d meet throughout the week, often more than once a day, now that she had shifted to doing more administrative work than hospital work. Though she still loved healing, she’d trained enough of her women and understood that her talents and knowledge were better suited to helping others in her new role. She’d written to Sokka and sent the letter immediately with the fastest messenger hawk they had. She’d received his reply within days: 

Of course you should take up the position, Katara! It was made for you! I was going to suggest it myself. Will you please remind Fire Lord Grumpy that appointing Ambassadors from my nation is my purview and he can only agree to it? Or disagree if he has solid proof. What will he do next? Ask Suki? I need her here! But also, I’m glad it’s you I’ll have to correspond with now instead of that idot Tulimak. Let me know if you want any advice from your older and more experienced brother.

Missing you terribly, but not enough to call you back home,

The superior sibling.

PS: Remind Bumi that I’m his favourite, not that jerkbender.

PPS: Make Bumi read his letter out at your dinner table.

PPPS: Suki and Yue send their love.

Uncle Iroh came up to her towards the end of the week to tell her, “My dear, you look simply radiant. What a marked change since a few days ago I wonder what caused it?”

“We just cleared up some misunderstandings, Uncle,” she responded.

“Ah yes, misunderstandings. A single moment of misunderstanding is so poisonous that it makes us forget the hundred sweet moments spent together in a minute. Though was it something more than that, I wonder? My nephew won’t tell me anything.”

“I don’t know what you mean, Uncle.  We do miss you at tea though. Why did you stop coming?” she asked.

“Do you now?” he asked her, one eyebrow quirked. “These old bones are not what they used to be and I would rather a warm bed,” he said, sighing. “And besides, tea tastes best with just the right ingredients, nothing more and nothing less. You young people carry on. I don’t think you need me intruding.”

“Uncle, I’m sure you’d give me a run for my money in a bending battle right now, if you wanted to,” Katara remarked, and Uncle’s eyes twinkled. “And don’t worry about intruding. You haven’t met Zuko in more than a year, have you? The two of us, we’ll talk some other time.”

“Hmm, is that so?” he asked, rubbing his chin. “Maybe I’ll take you up on that offer one of these days then. You’re a lovely woman and I’m very glad that my nephew has found you again,” he said, giving her a very disturbing wink.

“Uncle, it’s not like that between the two of us!!” she nearly yelped out, now blushing furiously. “We’re just… we’re just good friends.” 

“If you say so…” he sang and walked away, leaving Katara extremely confused. 

That evening she told Zuko, “I feel like I’m making you choose between me and Uncle. I invited him today and he said he feels like he’s intruding. I can’t help but feel guilty.”

“You’re not!!” Zuko exclaimed immediately. “Making me choose  that is. I have my morning tea with him. He comes for my bending practice, he attends my meetings and wins over my ministers. He attends evening sessions and I have to watch the respect leave the kids’ eyes as he goes on with one awful childhood story after another, I am okay without him one-upping me with you here. How is it that my old uncle has more charm than me…” he fumed. Katara snorted and they went on with their evening.

Even now that she was accepting the title of Ambassador, she would still continue her earlier projects in some capacity. Just that day, she’d had to yell at the completely inept Mayor of one of the farther-away islands. The fishing rights issue, according to her, would not be an issue at all if people would just stop being so blockheaded. 

“I  think the poor man is more scared of you than he is of me,” Zuko mused. 

“Oh, shut up.”

Towards the end of the evening, as she was leaving, Zuko asked her in the most careless tone of voice she’d heard from him, “So, you’re not dating anyone?” 

It took her a full minute to figure out what he was talking about. He looked very casual, looking out the window, but he was also biting his lip. He only did that when he was stressed about something. That was odd. 

“I did go out for a while with that one man recently...” she replied and saw him clench his fists. She had no idea why he was getting aggravated. 

“Who?” he asked, sounding a little curt.

 “Meh, no one you’d know,” she answered, heading out. He’d just reminded her of her last conversation with Fumio. That man had looked at her with such pity when she’d stated that she didn’t think she could see someone else as yet. It made her blood boil. 

The next evening, she detected an undercurrent of tension in Zuko’s interactions with her. “What is it, Zuko? Spit it out.”

“Nothing, it’s nothing,” he said, before changing the subject. She narrowed her eyes, but didn’t nag him. That would come later. Towards the end of the night though, just as she was walking out, he asked her again, “Are you still seeing them?”

Oh, so that’s what’s got him all worked up. This was too good an opportunity to pass up, she decided. Turning around, she strolled back toward him slowly. He was leaning against the wall and scrutinising his nails. The very picture of nonchalance.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” she said, eyes glittering.

He narrowed his eyes at her. “Are you meeting them again?” he asked, still cool.

“Maybe. What’s it to you?” she asked, walking even closer.

“Nothing,” he said, tightly. “As your friend, I am interested in your life. That’s all.”

Something seemed to come over her in that moment. Stalking closer, she tapped his chest with a finger. “Well, I think you’re jealous.”

Zuko sputtered, “Jea- jealous? Me?” he scoffed. Then scoffed once more for good measure. Katara smirked, she’d begun this to tease him a bit, but he was falling for it, hook, line and sinker. It pleased her. “I’ll have you know that the date was lovely,” she sighed exaggeratedly, as she looked into the distance wistfully. “He was kind and handsome and intelligent…” she could see Zuko stiffen, something flashing in his eyes, before he schooled his expression again. She continued, “… and really boring. I had a good time, but we won’t be meeting again.”

“Oh no, that’s too bad.” Zuko said, not sounding upset at all. Katara shrugged before closing the distance between them with a quick peck to his unscarred cheek. She heard a sharp intake of breath. “It is what it is. Goodnight, Firelord. You have nothing to be jealous of.”

He startled, blushed, and then seethed for a while in quick succession. This had been way too much fun, Katara decided. She winked and turned around, walking towards the door, when his voice reached her. “After that whole thing with Kuwa, I suppose you would understand jealousy more than most.” 

He wouldn’t dare.

She turned back again, fire blazing in her eyes, fists clenched. He was smirking easily, as he passed out of the door at the rear end of the room, connecting to his bedroom. “Goodnight, Katara.”

The next day, they went shopping. She and the kids went with Iroh, who was under strict instructions to keep them in control and NOT spoil them rotten. Instructions he steadfastly ignored even with Katara’s moderating presence.

“Lady Kya, you will look lovely in this one, come I’ll show you. It’s in violet too…” Kya, thoroughly enjoying being called a Lady, gave her mother snow puppy eyes. Katara laughed. “Oh, go ahead,” she said and Kya grinned and followed Uncle, pulling Izumi with her. At one point, they came across an all-you-can-eat pig-chicken stall and that was it for Bumi. None of the rest had any interest in observing the incoming spectacle and left him there for a while. Tenzin maintained the no attachments, no personal belongings rule for quite a long time, and Katara was proud. But then he was shown a sky-bison stuffed toy and started audibly reasoning with himself. Ruffling his hair, Katara bought it for him. “I’ve already bought it for you, see? I’m making you take it,” she explained. Uncle found it all amusing and went ahead and bought him another large golden koi toy as well. A little later, they came across a library and Izumi spent an hour there, Katara keeping her company. 

After that, they all wandered a bit more and Uncle took them to his favourite Mochi seller by the docks. He really did know the best places to go to, even though he rarely visited anymore. “Your children are delightful, Lady Katara,” Iroh told her. “You must be so proud.”

“I am very, very proud,” she said, and all three of them beamed. “And I’m proud of you too,” she said in an aside to Izumi later. “If you’re done with the scarf, do you want to move on to something else?” The girl nodded happily.

When they got back, it was just before dinner, and Zuko was waiting at the entrance to their quarters. “Uncle Zuko!! Do you wanna see the cool sword Gramp- Gramp got me today?” Bumi asked, nearly jumping at him.

“Uncle Zuko, tell me how my dress looks! It’s new!!” Kya said, twirling. 

“Kids…” Katara sighed, but Zuko laughed and took his time appreciating everything they’d bought. “That’s all you ate?!!” he asked Bumi. “I can eat twice that!” Bumi’s mouth dropped open, hero worship shining in his eyes as Tenzin pulled Zuko’s clothes from behind. “Say hi to Fluffy and Goldy, Uncle Zuko.” 

The older kids muffled their laughter, but Zuko duly acknowledged both new members of the team.

“Uncle Sokka’s sent letters, everyone! Let’s go, let’s go,” Katara said finally, ushering them all inside. “Katara,” Zuko said, catching hold of her forearm before letting go immediately. She giggled, “It’s fine, Zuko. I’m not angry anymore. What is it?”

“There’s something I need to show you,” he said, holding out his arm tentatively. “If you will…?” She smiled and took it.

 “What is it?” she asked and he pulled her along. They presently came along to the office quarters. Going in, he opened a door that she’d just walked past in all the times she’d come here. He quickly lit the lamps and Katara gasped.

Inside was a room with wooden and blue furnishings. Furs were carefully placed on the floor and in the centre was a table stocked with writing utensils and scrolls and a Firelilly in a vase. The ceiling had the motif of the Southern Water Tribe arranged in blue mosaic tiles.  Floor to ceiling windows opened to a view of the sea in the distance. A breeze blew in from the West and she just knew that she’d be able to see the most magnificent sunsets.

 Katara was struck completely speechless. Covering her hands with her mouth, she kept looking around, blinking very quickly as though to dispel the dream. “Do you like it?” came an anxious voice from beside her and she looked up at him with wide eyes. 

“Do I like it? I LOVE IT. I LOVE IT SO MUCH, IT’S THE BEST GIFT I’VE EVER RECEIVED!!” she squealed, hugging him tightly.  Slipping off her footwear, she ran through the room, feeling the fur under her feet. She ran her hands over the table and the walls, peering out through the window, and then walked back and twirled once, laughing out loud like a maniac. With a shit-eating grin on her face, she looked back at Zuko who was smiling tentatively. “It’s your new office, if you haven’t guessed. Your friends from the North helped get some of this stuff, and you mentioned that you missed home that day...” he said, rubbing the back of his head.

“Oh, this is so thoughtful, ” she said, grasping his hands and pulling him forward to the centre of the room. She was still soaking it all in, this little bit of paradise that he’d gifted her, before her gaze settled back on him, falling on their entwined hands for a minute. His were warm and calloused with sword fighting injuries- new and old. They nearly engulfed her own, smaller ones, rough with the hardship expected in the Tribes. She revelled in the feel, as he squeezed once and she squeezed back. Katara couldn’t help but think back to the time they’d first interacted, when he’d dangled her mother’s necklace in front of her, and now.  “Why’re you so good to me?” she asked him, looking up, straight in his eyes. 

“Because you’re the best person I know,” he replied simply.

“Don’t say that… I’ve been awful to you,” she said, the guilt sweeping through her. 

“As have I. It’s water under the bridge. All of it,” he said firmly and she smiled. 

“Thank you, Zuko,” she said gently, weight behind her words. She wasn’t just thanking him for the lovely gift. And perhaps he knew that, as he said, “You have nothing to thank me for.”

Then, he tugged at her hands and she reluctantly let go. As soon as he got them free, Zuko walked over to the table and picked up a scroll. Offering it to Katara, he said, “You are now formally the Southern Water Tribe Ambassador. Sokka sent me this today. Everything is in place.” 

She took the document and unscrolled it to see two sets of signatures. She hastily penned hers and dried it before giving it back. 

 When they finally arrived at dinner, conversation was already in full flow and Bumi called out to Zuko as soon as they entered, “Uncle Zuko, Uncle Zuko! I read Uncle Sokka’s latest letter. It was very confusing, but he said that I should ask you to help me out!”

Immediately, she could see Zuko get his guard up. “What is it?”

"Uncle Sokka says I’m a man now and wants you to tell me about the facts of life! Something about a man's oar entering the woman's igloo? And... Penguin sledding? I mean no offence, Uncle Zuko but I think I know more about that than you do." 

Zuko choked on his food and Uncle Iroh spewed out water from his nose as he laughed. Katara was grinning behind her hand as well. She'd be sure to overhear this conversation one way or another. Bumi continued, even more confused than before, “And there was something about wooden mornings… No morning wood…”

 “Uhh, sure thing Bumi.” Zuko cut him off, sounding a bit queasy. “Maybe some other time. It’s for men only.” Then, almost to himself, he muttered, “And I’d thought I’d avoided this by having a daughter. Sokka, you...” Katara cleared her throat and Zuko clamped his mouth shut.

"I wanna know the facts of life too!!" Izumi interjected, disgruntled with all the secrecy.

"Don't worry my wildfire, Auntie Katara will tell you all about that, won't she?" Zuko smirked. His daughter turned pleading eyes towards her, and she had to respond with, "O-of course. You and Kya both. When you're a little older, maybe." Then, changing the topic before any more unnecessary questions reached them, she said, “I have been appointed the Ambassador of the Southern Water Tribe to the Fire Nation.”

Immediately, a chorus of “Whoa” and “Congratulations” went up. “Very well deserved,” was Uncle Iroh’s comment.

"So does that mean we're staying?" Kya asked hopefully, always quick to see the point.

 "For a couple of months at least." 

At these words, a chorus of whoops echoed across the hall and Katara had to suppress a smile. "Apart from that, there's also a  few things I need to help Uncle Zuko with, if you all don't mind? If anyone is feeling homesick, I can see you home. We can arrange something,” Katara said, worriedly. She’d rather stay with her babies, but it would be wrong to keep them somewhere they didn’t want to be.  

"Nope, I love it here," Kya said, immediately.

"I'm learning sword bending!" Bumi nearly screamed.

"I don't want to say bye to my friends!" Tenzin interjected.

"Yaay!! There's still so much I want to show you all! Oh, and the monsoons are coming. You can't leave before those!" came Izumi’s voice over them all.

“OOH, I CAN’T WAIT-”

Through the chaos, Katara noticed that their host, with his chin supported by his hand, had eyes only for her. She met his gaze across the table and the air changed, charged with something electric, palpable only to her. If she stuck her tongue out maybe she'd taste it. Maybe Zuko could feel it too- eyes sparkling and a light smile playing on his lips, neither of them willing to look away. And there it was again- the curious fluttering in her tummy that she thought she'd crushed years ago. 

Oh.

The cacophony of arguments and shouting seemed to incredibly seep into the background and it was just him and her. He was looking at her in that way of his- that inscrutable expression on his face, and it was then that she realised it. Perhaps she’d always known, perhaps it had been denial. Perhaps it was the beginning, but far more likely was that she was in the middle with no idea how she got there. 

She had a crush. 

On Zuko.

The hopelessness of the whole situation could almost have made her laugh. She had children for Tui’s sake. She couldn’t risk their happiness, what with all the recent emotional upheavals. Then again, they were both political figures, there would be ramifications on ramifications if they even thought of going through with it. And that is, if he did like her. He probably wasn’t even looking for love. Ty Lee’s words wandered back in her mind. He had his daughter to think of and wouldn’t even consider dating anyone. But still, the flutterflies wouldn’t leave. Oh, this is not going to end well.

At that moment, Bumi called for Zuko's attention and she looked away, tucking strands of hair behind both ears and looking downwards, before realising what she’d done. She really did have it bad. 

That night they swapped the tea for wine.

“To Ambassador Katara!” Zuko toasted.

“To a new partnership!” she toasted back.

The wine warmed her throat and her belly and the flutterflies residing there. She found that they seemed to beat faster when she impersonated Panuk and coaxed a chuckle out of him. They beat faster when she caught him looking at her through the corner of her eyes. And there was chaos when their hands brushed and he handed her a refilled glass.

She lost count of the number of glasses, as her world reduced to a cozy little room with her crush friend for company. They talked about the usual things. He went on about how little he was looking forward to the conversation with Bumi and then she talked about their shopping expedition before feeling the need to clear something up from the previous night. Everything was warm and slightly fuzzy and she was in a sharing mood.

“I was NOT jealous. I was NOT. How, how, how DARE you insti- insit- insinuate such a horrible thing,” she vehemently pointed out, because she wasn’t. She wasn’t, she wasn’t, wait was she?

“I was just teasi-” 

“I mean, I was disappointed you know?” She asked Zuko, who was looking quite amused. “You are this amaaaazing father, seriously you’re so good at it. How’re you so good at it? You’re all kind and understanding and still strict and sweet and patient and loving-”

“Thank you. I-”

“Shhh, don’t interrupt. Like I was saying, you’re such an amazing father, but that day I thought you were dating that ridiculous woman! And I was like, ‘But what about Izumi?’ She needs a good mother, someone who is good, you know what I’m saying?”

“Uh Uh,” he said nodding away.

“So that’s why I was upset! And she even left a mark on you, what would people say!” Katara had been most disturbed by it, he should be grateful that it was gone.

“Actually most people know-”

“So my anger was justified.” She said, nodding to herself. “And I thought you hadn’t told me about your girlfriend! Aren’t we past that? Am I not your best friend, Zuko? Tell me Zuko, tell me!”

“You most definitely are.”

“Good. Because you are mine as well. And you’ll tell me if you start having feelings for anyone?” She didn’t know why it was so imperative to have an answer.

“I promise that I will.” And she nodded at him sincerely, satisfied with this response. “More wine, please!” His fingers brushed hers while he was handing it over and the flutterflies returned in a swarm. She downed the glass in one go in a hope to drown them. It did not work. 

“Wine is so nice. I really think it understands me,” she said. “Water is my favourite, you know, because I’m a WATERbender,” she giggled. Zuko did too, and she was encouraged to continue. “And five flavour soup reminds me of home and I love it too, but sometimes it burns, but wine- wine is just so good to me.” 

“I agree,” Zuko said, “but maybe you should give water a chance now. You’ve been partial to wine for too long.” 

“Hmm, not a bad idea, Firelord.” Perhaps that would drown the flutterflies once and for all. Still she couldn’t risk neglecting the wine, so she picked it up as well.

“Which flutterflies do you want to drown?” he asked her, but she’d already gotten up. Or she would have, had the Earth not betrayed her and gotten her to stumble.

 “Bad Earth!” she admonished as Zuko rushed to steady her with his hand on her waist. This just caused the flutterflies to beat faster. His touch warmed her wonderfully and she wanted to get closer to him. And so she did, because he was her friend and friends held each other.

“Light weight," he said, a smile in his voice.

" 'M not," she affirmed. The nerve! Accusing her of being a lightweight!

"Well, since we've had about the same and I'm better off, you are the lightweight," he told her.

She'd said that last part out loud? 

"Yes, you did" he informed her now, struggling to contain his laughter. She loved hearing him laugh, not a chuckle, not a snort - a laugh. It was like music to her ears, she never wanted it to end and she grinned happily, proud of herself for accomplishing this feat. When he managed to rein himself in, she said if a little dopey, "No, no. Don't stop. You sound so happy!" 

"Okay, that's enough. You're cut off Katara." He said, trying to pry the bottle from her hand. 

"Tara," she corrected him.

"I'm sorry -?"

"Call me Tara. I'm Tara to you, always have been," she explained. 

"Katara -" He looked a bit worried.

"Nooo, why aren’t you getting it?” she cried out, placing a finger on his lips. They were really soft and full and nice. Why was he blushing? Had she said that last part out loud too? 

"Ta- ra. Say it. Say it," she nagged. 

"Will you stop drinking then?" He asked from behind her finger. 

It was an interesting proposal. She rubbed her chin with her other hand. "Okay!" She answered brightly. He sighed, the breath puffing against her skin and gave her a lazy smile. She was yet to remove her finger and he grasped her wrist, pulling it away. She could feel her heart skip a whole beat.

"Tara,” he finally said out loud. Oh Spirits, that felt wonderful to hear.

"Again."

"Tara,” he said, softer. 

She could feel him rubbing his thumb on the back of her hand. “Again. Please,” she said softly, matching her voice to his.

“Tara.” This time he’d whispered, but she’d heard him. They were standing so close now, she could spot the beginnings of stubble. "Never stop. Promise you won't," she whispered back, suddenly serious, beseeching. 

"Never." He promised, eyes soft, looking intensely into hers. There was a saying about a dragon's gold eyes at the back of her mind. Something about hypnotism. And Katara was certainly hypnotised. There was no way she could look away. She turned her hand such that his fingers grazed her wrists and the electricity from before returned. It shot up her arms and coursed through her veins. When she recovered enough to focus again, she noticed Zuko staring slightly south of her eyes, chest heaving. She licked her lips, leaning slightly towards him, and watched him do the same.

The bottle slipped out of her hands and crashed, breaking her out of her stupor.

She looked away with an, "Oh!" The bottle was broken, with glass and wine on the floor. She tried to salvage what was left of it and then tried to pick up the broken bits when a large hand stilled hers. "No, don't! You'll cut yourself." 

"Then I'll heal myself," she explained. 

"You're drunk Tara, maybe tomorrow okay? I'll escort you back to your rooms,” he said, pushing her away. 

“I’m not!!” she cried out, but he steadfastly ignored her.

She made it to the door before reeling. “Ugh, the stupid Earth is at it again,” she explained. “Bad Earth! Bad!” 

He slid an arm behind her for support, “Then we must be extra careful.."

She barely noticed him nod at his security before marching her down the corridors. Her feet dragged and it was slow going. And she was very upset that Zuko was keeping a respectable distance between them now. Boo. But then the Earth actually helped for once. The next time he stopped to steady them both, it attacked again and she pitched forward.

"Okay, that's it," she heard him say. Suddenly, the world tilted, she was horizontal and moving at a much faster pace than before. She could see the red columns whoosh past. There was a warm chest next to her and she rested her head on it, placing both hands around his neck. This was what she’d been thinking about. It was so nice here. Warm, and comfortable, and, oh- muscles...

“Tara-” came a strangled voice.

“Shhh.” The rocking motion was making her sleepy. And that was perhaps why she said what she said next, eyes still closed. "You smell so good. I could stay like this all day.”

He stilled and looked down at her. She could not believe she’d actually said that out loud, he was probably going to think she was some sort of creep now. Katara burrowed her face in his clothing, not daring to look him in the eye. There was a pause then, that to her felt like years. 

Finally she heard him say, “You do too. Like the Jasmine-lotus in bloom. Like afternoons by the pond and late evenings by the fountain. I can’t get enough of you.”

At this, she squeezed her eyes open for a minute to see him looking at her with such… tenderness. There was an intensity of emotion behind his eyes which she couldn’t understand. It confused her. It pleased her. Then she closed them back, a smile on her face, and cuddled further into him. He tightened his hold and she fell asleep before they even reached her room.

The last memory she had of that night was of hands tucking her in and ghost lips brushing across her forehead. Which was odd, because ghost lips should have been cold, but these were warm. And left tingles in their wake. 



Notes:

A/N: I wrote that last bit while sleep drunk, in an overnight train a few weeks ago. It didn't fully fit in that chapter, so it kept getting pushed back until now. This was supposed to be posted a few days ago, but real life intervened. Unfortunately, there's a lot coming up irl and the next update might take a little longer.
So, I've seen in a lot of fics that penguin sledding is popularly considered slang for jerking off. I just decided to continue it.
As always, I have my beta to thank :) and all my readers, for sticking with this story.
And Mochi: you’re absolutely amazing. I’m still trying to work out how to include fanart on Ao3, but I cannot thank you enough for it.

Chapter 13: Dragon Riding Is Dangerous

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The next day, Katara awoke with a terrible headache and a remedy for it by her bedside. The events of the previous night were still a little woozy. The sun was high up in the sky when she finally got round to cleaning up and instead of her nightclothes, found that she was wearing the previous evening’s dress. Slowly, as the steamed water washed away the last day’s grime, everything came back to her and brought with it wave after wave of embarrassment. 

She wished with all her heart that she could just crawl under a rock and die, but that was not an option, seeing as it was her first official day as ambassador. And besides, she’d promised that she’d be an adult about everything hadn’t she? So, she squared her shoulders, straightened her back, and went about her day.

It was a near miracle that she got any work done, considering that every few minutes she’d be reminded of what she may (or may not) have said the previous evening. All this as she juggled her duties in her new position and all her many previous projects. The reservoir was nearly cleaned and newly renamed, but the next batch of healers was due any day and she had to build the proposals for the health camps, there were a number of patients waiting personally for her and she’d recently started dabbling in some welfare projects as well. Maybe Zuko was right, maybe she really didn’t know where to stop with these.

Maybe he’d swing by her office to reprimand her, maybe he’d walk up to her, whispering “Tara” as he held her from behind, breath hot against her skin, hands on her waist…

“Madam Ambassador Katara,” came a voice from the door.

“Yes, yes I’m here!” she all but yelped out as the Minister for Trade entered the room. He stayed for a while, far longer than she’d have preferred. She wrapped up the meeting as soon as she could and as soon as he was out the door was reclaimed by the daydream. Now where were we…

“Ambassador Katara?” the voice squeaked out from the door again.

“What is it now?!” she barked.

The minister shrank back and she sighed. Her head was still hurting and apparently there was another set of legislation that had to be gone over. She tamed her frustration, and got to work- she had to give a decent impression on her first day if nothing else. He left after a while and immediately her thoughts flashed back to the previous night. She didn’t even know what she’d say to Zuko, how he’d greet her. Had she really insisted on him calling her Tara? 

Well done, Katara. You’ve made a good situation extremely awkward. How she’d explain to him the reason why she’d waxed eloquent about his lips and -oh spirits- smell, she didn’t know . Speaking of his lips… There was another knock and a servant came in with a message.

There was another minister after that, then a merchant, then finally a clerk with even more documents and now she was glad that there was other work she was involved in that involved getting out from behind the desk. Finally, the last person rushed out, scrolls tucked under his arms and she relaxed.

What was I thinking about… yes, you’ve successfully invaded all of his prized personal space. Speaking about invading personal space… He’d probably come up to her, whisper her name, run his nose along the shell of her ear…

“Tara? May I come in?”

She immediately snapped back to reality. Zuko was leaning against her door. What would she say to him, what could she say to him, should she apologise, she probably should, wait… what did he just call her?

“Tara? You okay?” he asked, frowning at her.

“Yes, yes absolutely. What happened?” she managed.

“Uhh… nothing, just uhh… decided to swing by. See how you were settling in.” He looked nervous, and she could tell he was twiddling his fingers even though his hands were hidden under the folds of his robes. Curious.

“I’m doing fine, but I think I need to apologise for last night,” she said, as she got up, the words rushing out. Zuko’s nose scrunched up. She explained further, “I was way out of line. I probably creeped you out and was an utter nuisance while you were just trying to be a friend to me. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry-” She was broken off by the sound of Zuko chuckling. 

“You don’t need to worry, Tara. I’m used to you being an ‘utter nuisance’-”

“Hey!”

Zuko chortled, “You’re such a lightweight and you say the darndest things when drunk.” Then something seemed to occur to him. “Can I still call you Tara?” he blurted out.

A smile broke out on her face. “Yes, I think I’d like that. And can we forget the rest of the night? I didn’t really mean any of it. Must’ve been too many romance scrolls… heh…” A lie, and a very bad one, her hands were twisted up in the folds of her dress with the effort, but he looked to have bought it. His face seemed to crumple for a bit before righting itself. 

“Oh- why are you still at the door, come in!”

He shook his head, “Busy day. I actually have a meeting, which will start… exactly five minutes ago,” he said guiltily. 

“Oh, go then! I’ll come by later!”

He was still fiddling, and had begun looking slightly green “Yeah, I should, shouldn’t I?” And turned to walk away. Katara heaved a sigh of relief. Well, at least he wasn’t annoyed with me.

He returned a little later, looking as nervous as before. “Uhh, still doing fine then?”

“Yes? Do you need something?” she asked distractedly, in the middle of drafting a proposal for the council.  

“No- no…” he said, before leaving. 

He was gone all of five seconds, before he returned, resolve written all over his features. “Iwantedtoknowifyou’dwatchaplaywithme.”

“Huh?” Was he having a stroke?

Zuko gulped and repeated, “Will you, um watch a play with me?” There was something interesting going on with his face where he looked like he was trying to be stoic but was turning redder by the minute. “They’re playing Love Amongst the Dragons and I know you haven’t watched it yet and you said the other day that you’d like to catch a play with me. And now that we’re friends again and, you know what, I’m sorry for presuming. Spirits, I sound like a school boy. Maybe you’re busy. I’ll just go now.”

“I’d love that.” 

It had just burst from her and she could feel her face heating up as well. Which was stupid, because it was just an outing with a friend. He’d said so himself.

“You would?” he asked, eyes wide. 

She nodded, fighting the urge to play with her hair. “When are we going?”

“There is one showing in three days in the theatre by the docks and one in ten closer to the market.”

“The docks it is.”

And then he fully smiled at her while still looking slightly nervous. Tui, he’s so handsome… Then he rushed away, leaving her wondering what exactly had happened. She spent the rest of the day terribly distracted.

As soon as she could, she called on Ty Lee’s help. They were walking through the corridors after an hour of the most boring tea with some nobility.  “Do you have any clothes I could borrow? Something in the Fire Nation style? I’d like to blend in when I go out next,” she asked, as casually as she could. Ty Lee shot her a shrewd glance. 

“With??”

“With myself!” Katara yelped, but just then, Zuko strode past with his entourage and still in his regalia. He waved at them discreetly and Katara felt herself blush again. Spirits, she was hopeless. She turned around just in time to see her friend grinning at her. 

“So, it seems you two talked some stuff out?”

“Yeah, we did,” Katara said, finding a very pretty bird to look at.

“Well, your aura looks really pretty today. I’m glad!!” Ty Lee chirped from beside her. “ I have a better idea. Instead of you borrowing my clothes, let’s go shopping!” 

And so, the next evening found them both navigating the women’s shopping section. It was exhausting, because along with the heat, humidity and crowds, Katara had to deal with a very bubbly Ty Lee dragging her to shop after shop. Typically, Katara would be handed something scandalous to wear and she’d reject it on first sight. She’d then pull out a more sensible outfit and Ty Lee would boo loudly. 

“Everyone here wears these clothes, Katara!!” she said finally, at the fifth shop. It was another extremely revealing dress Ty Lee had picked, which showed a lot of her tummy and a good hint of cleavage. Wearing something like this as a child was okay, but now…

“That’s not true. Your nobility is always fully covered!” Katara pointed out, thinking of Mai’s dresses.

“That’s because they always stay indoors! The play comes to them! If you’re going out and don’t want attention, you want to mix with the commoners!” Ty Lee exclaimed. “And besides, it is so HOT these days.”

“It’s always hot here,” Katara said grumpily.

“No, Katara, it’s especially HOT these days.”

“I did not notice any new changes…” Katara said, wondering if the heat was getting to her friend’s head. The shopkeeper also looked confused.

“It’s HOT with all these FIREBENDERS around. You know what they say about them. You will need to be prepared if you are to SPEND TIME with them. Dress weather appropriate, Katara. WEATHER APPROPRIATE.”

Oh yes, she would be spending time with the best fire bender there was. Golden eyes, strong arms, his hand around her…

“You know what? You’re right, it is getting… hotter around here. I should probably dress… weather appropriate.”

“Yess!!” Ty Lee exclaimed gleefully. “Now just you see, you should buy this top, but the bottom is far too high up, we will need… yes- that! And then…” 

After that, Katara all but gave up and let Ty Lee play her dress up games. Later, Katara asked Ty Lee, “What exactly do they say about firebenders?”

“Oh, this and that…” Ty Lee said, distractedly and wandered off to look at a gemstones shop. Katara reached her rooms with a significantly lighter purse. 

The day of the play dawned and even her children could tell something was up with her. “Mom, will you just tell us what’s on your mind?” Kya asked, as Katara kept distractedly playing with her hair that morning. “Hmm? Nothing, it’s nothing.”

She didn’t even know why she was behaving like a teenager on her first date. She was a fully functioning adult who was just going on an outing with her friend, Zuko. Her friend with whom she’d had a million evenings drinking tea. With nothing else happening between them. 

She forced herself to focus on the day’s tasks. When midday came, she realised she needed to get a scroll she’d kept for some midnight reading and went back to her rooms for it. Just before reaching the entrance though, she saw a battered and bruised Kya slip in. 

“What-” Katara rushed after her, pulling her to a stop. Her baby had a black eye and cuts and bruises on her arms and legs, some of which looked like they’d been halfway healed. Katara began to see red.

 “I didn’t give myself away. I didn’t bend,” Kya placated her.

“I don’t care about that!! Who did this to you?! Oh, my star,” Katara said, caressing her daughter’s face, immediately bringing healing water to her hands. “What happened? Where?” On realising that her mother wasn’t angry, Kya relaxed. 

“If you think this is bad, you should see those people,” she replied, grinning proudly.

“People-? WHO?? WHAT?” Alarm bells began ringing in Katara’s head while Kya just shrugged. Katara begged for answers. Then threatened, bargained and pleaded, all the while as she healed her daughter and forced food on her. Kya just wouldn’t give anything away.

“I’m not telling you, Mom. Can you please drop it? I’m fine now! Stop smothering me!!” After a number of unsuccessful tries, which only made her daughter increasingly irritable, Katara tried a different strategy. However, this failed too because Tenzin appeared genuinely clueless and Bumi started making up extravagant lies on the spot. 

Why, oh why did my children have to inherit my stubborn streak

Besides, she’d honestly thought it was Bumi who’d get in a scrape of this magnitude first, and being left in the dark like this was quickly getting on her nerves. Had someone finally identified them as her children? Was this a targeted attack? Shutting the door behind her, she was about to make her way to Zuko’s office, when she felt a hand tugging at her sleeve. 

“She was defending me. That’s why she got in trouble.” A small, bespectacled face told her. “If it’s anyone’s fault, its mine. Don’t be angry at her please.” The girl actually looked scared and Katara wondered if she really gave such a bad cop image. “I’m not angry, sweetheart,” she said, crouching down to her level and Izumi looked relieved. “Just a little worried. I don’t want any of you getting hurt.” Now that she was paying attention, she could see that this girl was sporting a faint black eye and bruised knuckles too. Katara felt her temper flare even further. “Come, let’s get you patched up and maybe you can tell me what happened.” 

They reached Izumi’s room and Katara began her questioning as she healed her, crouching down as Izumi sat on the edge of her bed. “How did this happen? I just want to know who it was. And what happened. Has someone identified you?”

“No, Auntie K, it’s not that, don’t worry. But I can’t tell you what happened,” Izumi said, looking away.

 “Were they your own age?” 

“No, a bit older.”

Katara curled her fingers into fists, “Did they try something with either of you?” 

“What do you mean?” Izumi genuinely looked confused. This made Katara feel slightly better. “Let it go, Auntie K, I’m telling you that there’s nothing to be done about the whole situation. Why do you want to know their names?”

“So that when I challenge them to an Agni Kai, it’ll all be fair and above board.” Katara was only half joking. 

Izumi gasped. “You won’t!! Dad won’t let you!”

“Hmm, I’m sure he will, once I tell him that someone beat you up!” Gotcha.

Izumi's eyes widened even further. “No, no, Auntie Katara. Please don’t tell him about this! I don’t want to worry him even more!”

“Then tell me what happened or I’m going right this instant.” 

Izumi was silent, as she looked down at the ground. Katara held her hands, peering into golden eyes. “Sweetheart…” she whispered.

Izumi finally looked up, teary eyed, “It’s my fault. People hate me because I’m not a bender. Fire Lords are supposed to be benders. There were these older boys-” Izumi hiccupped “-who were saying that I was unworthy and all the usual stuff. I usually ignore it. I’m used to it. But Kya got angry.” Tears were streaming down the child’s face now. “She said some mean things to them. One of them punched her and she got up and hit him back. Then it was the two of us against five of them. Luckily, I always have my knives on me and Bumi ran up to us with his swo-” Here, she clapped her hands to her mouth, looking alarmed.

Katara sighed. She and Zuko had suspected that Bumi took his training sword with him everywhere. “Bumi ran up to you with his sword withdrawn, then what happened?” she asked.

“They were already losing, so when Bumi reached, they just ran… Please don’t be mad, Auntie K,” she pleaded tearfully.

“I’m not, sweetheart. If anything, I’m glad you two held your own and those idiots got what they deserved. Now, Izumi, tell me. Could Fire Lord Sozin bend?”

“Yes.” The girl was still sobbing.

“And Fire Lord Azulon?”

“Y-yes.”

“And Firelord Ozai?” 

 Izumi just nodded meekly. “And were any of them good Fire Lords? Or good people? Do you think they deserved to lead a country?” Izumi shook her head, looking at Katara with wide eyes. Her tears had begun drying up.  “If I remember my history…” Katara continued, pretending to think, “they were all horrible people. Leading the longest war there was.” 

Izumi spoke up at this, “Noo Auntie K, the longest war in history was between the five feuding clans of the Earth Kingdom, six hundred years ago, it was Avatar Yangchen who-” she broke off to see Katara smiling at her.

“What is it that Uncle Iroh says? Those who know their history have a lesser chance of repeating it. You know your stuff. You’re so smart, my sunshine. And good and kind. You’re brilliant with your knives and as sharp as them. You probably got that from your mother- she was a great stateswoman.”

“You knew Mom?!!” Izumi asked her, eyes wide.

 “Not well,” Katara said, thoughtfully. “We got along well enough, I suppose. Mai was a little icy to outsiders but fiercely devoted to those she loved. She was really intelligent and brave as well. Truth be told, it was terrifying having her as an enemy during the war, and she’d be so proud of how you held your own today.” Then, focusing on the girl in front of her, she said, “She was a non-bender and an amazing person. I see her in you.”

Izumi threw her arms around Katara’s shoulders, sniffling into her clothes. “You really think so?”

“I know so. You are worthy, Izumi. Never forget that. You will be a wonderful Fire Lord- if you choose to take up that mantle.”

“I don’t have a choice, Auntie K,” Izumi sniffled. 

Katara pulled back to look at her. “That’s not true! Do you really think your Dad would force such a large responsibility on you if you didn’t want it? We’ll figure something out!”

Izumi smiled weakly at her, but wouldn’t leave her side that day. Katara postponed some of her later meetings to tell Izumi stories about her mother. They sewed for a little while, had another heart to heart and then called for some sweets, after which they talked some more. Izumi, it turned out was quite talkative when she was comfortable with someone. 

That evening, Katara asked Zuko if it was possible to postpone the play. Zuko’s face fell quite drastically for a moment before he fixed it back with a “Sure. It’s alright if you don’t want to come, Katara. I didn’t mean to force you. I won’t feel bad about it.” Then, with a plastered on grin, he continued, “It’s fine!! It’s fine! It’s fine.”

She rolled her eyes fondly. “Except that you’re not forcing me. I do want to go with you. Not today, though. The girls had a Day and I think they need me. You said that the play was available on a later date as well?”

Zuko nodded, a guarded expression on his face. She smiled, “Great! Let’s do that, then. I’ll see you later tonight. I’ve got to rush now.” 

After that, all the way through dinner, Izumi sat next to Katara, who paid her extra attention, ladling food into her bowls and smoothing back her hair. “Mom, stop smothering her!” Kya called out finally.

“I’m not-” Katara started.

“It’s okay. I like it,” Izumi said happily. Katara let out a breath.  “And I like you, my sunshine.” Izumi demanded that she sleep with her that night, and Katara agreed.

Later at tea, Zuko asked her outright, “Is everything okay with Izumi?”

“Oh yeah. We had to discuss certain things. Girl problems. Nothing for you to worry about right now,” Katara said, sticking to her promise and hoping that much like every other father she knew, Zuko would not venture into ‘Girl Problem’ territory. He was quiet for a while, but then started getting an increasingly panicked look on his face.

“Tara,” he said abruptly. “Please don’t tell me my daughter has a boyfriend. It’s too soon. It’s far too soon,” he beseeched her and Katara let out a peal of laughter. “Not yet, don’t worry.”

“Oh, thank Agni.”

However, that brought back that afternoon’s conversation and Katara sobered pretty quickly. Izumi, Mai…  

“I’m sorry.” It just burst out of her. 

“What about?” Zuko asked, turning his head to look at her. 

“For not reaching in time, for not being able to do enough for her. I know I’m years late, but -”

“Tara, what exactly are you apologising for, here?” he asked, thoroughly perplexed.

“I couldn’t save Mai,” she whispered, finally putting to words the heaviness she’d felt since the moment she’d seen his daughter. The greatest healer in the world and she couldn’t save her friend’s wife from dying in childbirth. She’d failed at the one thing she was supposed to be the best at, with disastrous consequences. And she’d rather not even think of how upset she’d been when she found out that he was to be a father the first time… She got up and started pacing, wringing her hands as she did so.

“You’re blaming yourself? Come on, Tara. You were heavily pregnant with Kya at the time. No one actually expected you to even turn up.” 

She couldn’t explain it, but this statement hurt. “Well, why wouldn’t I? You are both my friends. It was my duty and privilege to help you out in your time of need. And I failed.”

“Katara,” he said, getting up and pulling her to a stop, hands on her shoulders. “You did all you could. You travelled all the way while you were with child and tried your very best. Stop beating yourself up for it. Mai was unwell the first time she got pregnant as well. She understood the… risks the next time around, but was adamant.” At this point, his face fell. “If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s mine,” he sighed, pulling his hands away to gesticulate wildly. “This stupid office, this stupid title… We would have been happy without children, or we would have adopted! And that’s what I told her, but she insisted. She said that I’d need a legitimate heir. And she was probably right- she always was better at politics than I. But at what cost…” he said, looking away wistfully in the distance. 

There was a spell of silence, and Zuko went back to his seat, looking deep in thought.

“You loved her, didn’t you?” she asked him sadly.

“I did,” he answered, still not looking at her, and irrationally, she could feel her heart grow heavier. “She was my best friend, my closest confidante,” he said. The night air chilled Katara to the bone. “You still love her,” she said quietly. And here I’d started entertaining hopes. What a fool, an absolute idiot I am.

But he wasn’t paying attention. Distractedly, he continued, “She deserved much more than me though, much more than the love I could offer. She deserved the love of a lover who understood all of her and appreciated her for her. Not someone who she constantly argued with, someone who could never give her his all, someone who had feel-” He cleared his throat. “And she deserved to be in a relationship that wouldn’t kill her,” he finished softly.

Katara’s neck had cricked with the speed at which she’d turned to look at him.  “What do you mean? Zuko, she loved you. And you loved her back. You just confirmed it.” 

He met her gaze and shook his head with a sad smile on his face. “Do you remember that conversation we had? Back in the day? Everyone said that we were this… this fantastic team, that we made a lovely couple.  She was the perfect choice, but we… never seemed to work. I never could love her the way she seemed to love me. I tried. By all the spirits, I tried.”

 Zuko’s voice cracked at the end, and she could see his eyes brimming with tears. Katara engulfed him in a hug and almost immediately felt his arms come up around her. She felt moisture on her shoulder and wasn’t the first to let go. Her mind was abuzz with everything he’d told her and her mind flashed back to her and Aang- they had made for a fantastic team and a lovely couple as well. But underneath it all… 

Ty Lee had hinted that perhaps Mai and Zuko hadn’t been well suited for each other as well. She felt that there was still something that Zuko was hiding from her, but didn’t really know how to ask.    

He made them another pot of tea with trembling fingers and they had it in silence. Katara broke it finally. “You did love her Zuko, you said it yourself. And if she wanted to have children with you, it must’ve been because she loved you. You made her happy, Zuko. We could all see it.” He looked up at her as she said this. “If all this is not my fault, then neither is it yours. What you’re feeling is survivor’s guilt, and I understand. It’s only natural.”

“I mean, all relationships have their ups and downs. She was your childhood sweetheart and your wife. She probably was the one for you. Besides, what is love? You were good friends. You liked each other enough to have a child together. Who do you have to compare her to? Especially since you haven’t loved another.” At this point, she wasn’t sure if she was talking to him or to herself.

He just stared at her, and stared and stared. After a while, he asked her quietly, “Haven’t I?”

And on this enigmatic note, he bid her a good night and left.     

The conversation played in her mind repeatedly over the next couple of days. Especially the last part- it played games with her overactive imagination. She tried to bring it up again, but he shut her down. The next few days got awkward for a bit, but then one day, she saw him talking to Ty Lee. She’d come with an idea for their healthcare system but stumbled upon her comforting Zuko. For a moment, she felt a flare of jealousy, which she wasn’t proud of, which then morphed into concern. Zuko’s face was turned away, but Ty Lee saw her. She smiled sadly and waved her away. Later that day, she told Katara, “He’ll be alright. Nothing for you to be worried about.” 

Sure enough, she saw his mood change that very day. Over the next few days, he visited his mother and spent more time with Uncle. She wanted to ask him about it, but even for her, it felt like overstepping.

 Soon, it was the day of the play again. The entire day she was racked with nerves once more, but tried to keep it to herself. The last few days, Katara had felt some distance in their interactions and wanted to bridge it with this evening. She took her time getting ready. She applied the lip tint and black lining to her eyes just as she’d been instructed, (a good thing that she had Aki to help, or that would have taken forever) and wore the golden bangles and her new outfit. She felt exposed when a gust of wind blew by her bare belly, but braved it. As she walked out, Izumi and Kya’ s mouths dropped open.  

“Mom!”

“Whoa, Auntie K!”

“Are you going on a date, Mom?” Bumi asked her, all too innocently.

“Not a date! Hah, that would be the day…just a friendly outing with Uncle Zuko,” she said sheepishly. But her son didn’t seem to pick up on it.

“Uhuh… so both of you will be gone?” 

Katara narrowed her eyes, “Gramp-Gramp will still be here.” There was something afoot, but Katara couldn’t find it in herself to care.

Zuko was waiting by the fountain. On hearing her footfall, he turned around, and she watched as his eyes widened and mouth fell open in slow motion. He wouldn’t look away from her, even as she stepped closer. 

“Well?” she asked nervously. 

“Huh?” he looked like he’d been clobbered on his head.

“Well, what do you think?” she asked impatiently. Is it too much (or rather too little)? I’m not in my twenties, I have stretchmarks and a lot of emotional baggage…

“Ugghhg,” he managed. When she looked at him quizzically, head tilted, he tried again, “You- you’re gorgeous Katara. I- I don’t know what to say.”  

 She beamed up at him then with a “Looking pretty hot yourself, Firelord.” This just got him more flustered and she giggled. Zuko was wearing his casual clothes, ones like he’d worn out in Ember Island. Except now, his hair was longer and in a top knot, his face all sharp lines and if she focused, she could trace the muscles bulging on his arms. Was it just her imagination or did he smell extra delicious nice today? Mmm…

“Here, take this,” he beckoned, opening a cloak. She turned her back to him and he draped it around her. His fingers grazed her neck, lingering perhaps a moment too long, and she felt the warmth spread through her like wildfire. Then they were gone, as he fastened his own cloak and she tried to pull herself together.

“Come on,” he said, gesturing her forwards. Wading through perhaps the most unkempt part of the gardens, they reached the far wall. Zuko cleared away some shrubbery and she found herself looking at an opening, fit for one. Crawling through, they reached the other side. Then he jogged ahead, with a “Quick, before the patrol arrives!”, leaping over a low wall. There were two more jumps, one over the low hanging roof of the Agni temple. They slipped through an imperceptible crack in the final wall and she was immediately assaulted by the smell of dried spices and noises coming from the distance. Zuko threw open the doors to the warehouse that they were in, and they were off into the night, the streets of the Caldera bustling before them. 

Slipping their hoods back on, they turned into the main market area. It was a bustling hub of shops, people and food. People pressed into her, shopkeepers beckoned and the humidity stuck to her skin. Just as she felt like she was going to be pulled under, Katara felt a large hand slip into hers and pull her forward through the throng. She tightened her grip on it and it squeezed back. Suddenly the crowd ceased to matter as much. He pulled her through winding lanes passing between houses and shops, and soon they were at the doors to the theatre. Katara handed their tickets over while Zuko looked downwards, hiding his scar. She noticed a cooling system of some sort inside and was eternally grateful for it as they made their way to their seats. It seemed like they were just in time too, as the hall darkened almost immediately and slow music began to play. 

The buzz died around them, and Katara was suddenly acutely made aware of their seats, how close they were sitting, and the fact that she was still holding on to Zuko’s hand. Get a grip, Katara, this is not a fucking date. She let go of it immediately, folding hers in her lap to keep them from misbehaving. She tried to focus on the stage and not the ridiculously hot man next to her who smelled way too much like forbidden fruit. 

Zuko was right, the play was beautiful. And he was also always sure to point out the good parts. Theatre kid through and through, he’d lean over and whisper, “Now pay attention to this bit,” or, “I’m unsure of this character. I think she’s nuanced, but no one else likes her,” or, “ugh, they’ve messed up- this scene could have been way better.” But Katara was not annoyed by any of this, because she was a good friend and didn’t want to be rude. And also because whenever he leaned towards her to say something, his breath slid against her ear- it was such a lovely feeling. It reminded her of pirates, and ropes… She got goosebumps every single time

Towards the climax, when the lovers were getting reunited, she realised Zuko had stopped with his comments. She looked over, slightly worried, and saw him completely immersed in the experience, eyes brimming with tears. She waited for the scene to finish, then leaned towards him to say, “Does the Firelord need a moment to compose himself?” Zuko jumped up in his seat. He sputtered, “I- I wasn’t… that is… I was- ” Katara snorted, “Tearbending?” 

Zuko narrowed his eyes at her. “How could that scene not make you emotional?” 

“You know us waterbenders. Hearts made of ice,” she said loftily as she swiped some moisture from under his eyes. It had been a pretty good scene, though she wasn’t one to weep at such things. She continued ribbing him all the way out as they went to get food. They had some sake and fish at one stall, and then some pig-chicken at another. Emboldened by the sake, she held his hand again, warm against her skin, for fear that she’d get lost and for no other reason. He didn’t seem to mind. 

They passed by shops selling different things: gemstones, household items, garments and others. They discussed the play in parts and enjoyed the silence in others. A beautiful scarf caught her eye, golden like the sunset, golden like someone’s eyes. The sheer material winked at her, and she just knew it was extravagance she’d have to do without. She closed her eyes and tried to walk past, when the hand in hers stopped, pulling her to a halt with it. “Come on,” he said, walking over to the stall. 

“What? Zuko, no… It’s alright…” she tried, but he’d already fished out a purse of coins and paid the shopkeeper more than what was likely necessary. “Zuko,” she huffed as soon as he reached her again, parcel in tow. “You shouldn’t have!”

“It’s a gift. Please?” he whispered, looking into her eyes. His own were wide with hope, yet his hand trembled slightly and he looked unsure of himself.

She took it from him with a whispered “Thank you.” Then, with a peck on his cheek, she went  back to the shop and asked for the shop assistant’s help in wearing it. She came back, fairly certain that there was red dusting her cheeks as she looked up at him through lowered eyes. He looked like he’d been clobbered yet again. 

“It… uh, looks good on you,” he said and she smiled back at him. They both stayed like that for a bit, dopily looking at each other before Katara snapped out of it. “Let’s go back?”

 Zuko nodded and took her hand once more. She tried not to observe their intertwined fingers and imagine a future so unlikely that it felt like the spirits laughing at her. They decided to take a more circuitous and pleasant route back home. 

Soon, they’d left the main area of the market and the only noise was their feet on the cobbled streets. It was then that they heard it. A roar from afar as a shadow crossed the moon. 

Katara lifted her eyes to see a large winged creature flying past. And then another set of voices reached them- high pitched, excitedly screaming. It sounded like her children…

“Oh, Agni,” came Zuko’s voice from next to her.

Disengaging her hand, he jogged on ahead and reached the gates of the palace. The guards looked on in dismay as the Firelord and Ambassador of the Southern Water Tribe rushed in wearing commoners’ clothing. As soon as they reached a clearing inside, Zuko put two fingers in his mouth, whistling loudly. The beast above seemed to rear its head and went in a nose dive, its passengers shrieking, coming to an abrupt halt in front of them. 

It was a dragon, half as long as the Unagi and as wide as it. Katara took a step back. She took stock of large horns, long whiskers and red scales as it bowed its head to Zuko, hissing out steam. It was then that she noticed the figures sitting on it. A small girl in blue slid off and emptied the contents of her stomach in a nearby bush, while the other three stayed stock still, staring at them. Katara went to hold Kya’s hair back as Zuko levelled them all with a furious stare. He didn’t say a word, yet there was pin drop silence for the next five minutes.

“What did I say about dragon riding?” he finally asked.

More silence.

What. Did. I. SAY ?!” he yelled. Katara had to give it to him, for all the gentleness he showed, he was terrifying when angry.

“Th- that it’s dangerous,” answered Bumi tremulously. 

“That Druk is still a baby.” Izumi supplemented.

 Kya continued dry heaving. Everyone else slowly slid off and stood in front of him, staring at the ground.

“And did you listen?! Druk is a child!! As old as you in dragon years! He cannot carry all of you!! He hasn’t learned some things yet! There is only one person here who knows how to ride him and that is me!” Zuko’s eyes blazed with anger, yet his brow was furrowed in concern. “What if you’d fallen? You could have gotten hurt!! Druk could have gotten hurt!”

Everyone hung their heads, as more silence ensued. This was undercut with Druk giving Zuko a lick and a nudge, which looked like the dragon reassuring him. “This is your fault too!” Zuko said, turning on him. “You know you’re not supposed to take anyone else yet! You put everyone in danger today.” Druk’s face fell and he went away to curl in the corner, casting hurt looks their way.

“It’s my fault, Dad. I led them to Druk,” Izumi offered meekly.

“No, it was my idea. I’m sorry,” Bumi said softly.

“I bribed Druk with meat.” This last one came from Tenzin, and Katara was shocked.

“We’re sorry. We won’t do it again, Uncle Zuko,” Kya managed and they all nodded furiously.

Zuko lifted up a hand for silence. When he had all their attention, he said solemnly, “I’m not angry, just disappointed,” and everyone’s faces fell even further. Then, after a beat of a dramatic pause, he said, “Now, scram!” 

The children didn’t need to be told twice, they ran to their bedrooms fast as their little legs could carry them. “I’m impressed,” Katara told him grudgingly and he smirked at her.

“Want a ride?”

“On your baby dragon that could drop me at any moment? Sure!”

Zuko then placed two fingers in his mouth and whistled loudly. The dragon who’d so far been curled up in a corner, reared his head up in interest. “Come on, boy!” Zuko called out.

Druk snorted smoke and shot out towards them, trying to nuzzle his master. Zuko patted his head exasperatedly. “Yes, yes, you’re forgiven. This is Tara, my friend. Tara, Druk.”

Druk turned to her and she raised her hand slowly. “Go ahead”, Zuko said and she proceeded to pet the dragon in a way she hoped was right. 

“Oh you’re gorgeous, aren’t you? So handsome!” Druk snorted some more fumes and looked at her with half-lidded eyes, so it seemed to be working. “Such a good boy!!” she said and he proceeded to try and nuzzle her. She laughed, and next to her, Zuko hmphed.

“Alright, alright. Tara- on the dragon. Druk- stop flirting.” Katara giggled and protested, “But I like it!” as Zuko gave her a leg up before climbing up behind her.

Druk reared up and started a steep ascent and Katara held on to his scales for dear life, wind whipping her face, air billowing out behind her. She wondered if proposing a saddle would be insensitive. She was pushed back into a large broad chest – circumstances she could have appreciated better had it not felt like she was going to die. Then Druk shook himself and straightened, and she caught her breath. The man behind her chortled, the rumbling resonating from his body. 

“Go ahead, laugh!” she said, angrily. “Don’t mind me, I’ll just quietly fall off and die!”

At this, he laughed some more. Though annoyed, she was also feeling quite pleased with herself at this achievement. Then he said from behind her, “You won’t fall. I won’t let you.” And though the wind blew all around them, occupying all her senses, she could feel a warm hand moving across her bare waist to steady her. 

The dragon reached its altitude and slowed down, but the hand stayed where it was. Rough, sword-calloused and very warm. And this time, it was an inferno that spread through her at his touch as she let out a silent, shuddering breath. She would have to thank Ty Lee later, but for now, she settled for inching back into him. The night sky was moving around them, stars twinkling above and Earth rushing by underneath. There were the lights of the Palace, and there the marketplace, and in the far distance were the docks. It was magical, but all she could think of was the man behind her and his skin on hers. Druk took a sharp turn, and his hold tightened as she was pushed further back into the solid wall of muscle behind her.  

“Are you certain?” She asked, surprised at how breathy her voice sounded, very much unlike her own. 

His voice came from right next to her ear, breath tickling her neck. “Very.”

So far, she’d been enjoying this, but now she was made aware of a throbbing coming from her centre. Katara leaned back some more, as much as possible and he touched his head to hers, inhaling deeply. She could feel his breath as it skittered down her back, and it seemed quite ragged, perhaps more than her own.

“I've got you,” he whispered, breath ghosting the shell of her ear and leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake. 

He splayed his hand out across the exposed expanse of skin on her abdomen, covering most of it. Her breath hitched. She'd dreamed of this before, but nothing could compete with the reality of the situation. It might’ve been the sake they’d had earlier, but Katara was lost. Enveloped by warmth and the smell of him, the only thing keeping her tethered was the skin to skin contact and the insistent throbbing from her lower body.

Zuko was now rubbing his thumb in circles on her skin and she nearly whimpered. Don’t stop , she prayed. Don’t stop . He didn’t. He instead splayed out his hand some more, so that his fingers skimmed the topmost part of her exposed skin. The most delirious thoughts began in her head. A series of what ifs. She’d place one hand on top of his and pull it higher, much higher than it was now. She’d feel plenty through the silken material of her top. Maybe he’d pull it down to palm at her. Oh, that would be brilliant, rough skin on hers as he’d knead and pinch and tease and when they’d get down…

Druk suddenly took a dive and as Zuko fell back, trying to control him, the moment was broken. Spirits, what had she been thinking? What had she almost done? She had children who were still recovering from the drama a few months ago and Zuko was one of her oldest friends. Did she really want to put all those bonds at risk? If she tried anything with Zuko, it would not be just a fling and the situation was complicated as it is.

Zuko seemed to be similarly embarrassed and landed them both quickly. They walked in awkward silence to her quarters, footsteps echoing across corridors. At the door, he finally turned to her, “Tara, I’m so-”

“No, please don’t.” Katara didn’t think she could bear it if he apologised or worse, called it a friendly gesture. “We’re good, Zuko, it was an accident... we’re both a little touch starved, these things happen,” she said firmly, looking anywhere but at his face. He just stood there for a while, stock still, before nodding. 

“Well, then. Goodnight, my-” he stopped, bit his lip, and left, unspoken words trembling in the air.



Notes:

I know it's been a while, so bigger chapter to try and make it up to everyone following this story :) I truly enjoyed writing that one. It was such a respite from studying (for an exam which is still a month away btw). That last line: '"Good night my-" he stopped, bit his lip and left' has been directly taken from Jane Eyre. I read that book too early in life and it's left a profound impact on me.
I don't think there is anything to elaborate on the Maiko relationship that isn't implied already. I think Mai's really cool, but the relationship is kind of dysfunctional and neither seems to understand the other. Though with her upbringing, Mai would make a great Fire Lady. I wanted to show that Zuko had a thing for Katara, wrestled with it and felt guilty. But he's had ten years to heal and it's not really something that Katara can help with, not at this stage in their relationship at least, and that's why it's 'off-screen' since everything is from her PoV.
The Katara- Izumi scene and Katara- Ty Lee scenes have been playing on my mind for ages now, but angry Zuko came later. And the dragon- riding one... I'm going to be unsatisfied with forever, but might as well post.
Huge thanks to my beta @myrsinemezzo as always, for her support and suggestions!

Chapter 14: Push and Pull

Notes:

Hey everyone! Not dead, just had to go through an eventful May. Also this was a challenging chapter for me: it's the one in which we earn our rating! Though it won't be exactly what you expect. I stand by what I say in the tags, the smut can be skipped, and if you don't want to read it, just ignore the part between the two **


Art by the lovely momochiowo on Tumblr. Thank You so much, and I’m so sorry that it took me this long to figure the add image thing out.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Katara of the Southern Water Tribe swept through the corridors of the office complex. The blue kimono was impractical to her and difficult to manage, but today was an important day and she’d rather not display exactly how much of a foreigner she was. It was a last minute buy just for this very event. Aki had incorporated some Fire Nation ornaments in her usual Water Tribe hairstyle. She was looking to impress high society after all. And perhaps a particular Firelord…

No. Best not to dwell on it. 

She sighed. 

They had not spoken of it. They just hadn’t.

After all that talk about being adults and facing their issues head on, neither of them had brought it up. The whole deal felt wrong to her. It felt incomplete. She’d get the urge to bring it up, but then she’d get a glimpse of his face, peacefully drinking tea, steeping in his own thoughts and wondered what she’d even say.

  Hey Zuko, so I have a massive crush on you since Tui knows when, and the dragon riding incident got me all hot and bothered and I cannot stop thinking about you and have had at least thirty six instances of wanting to kiss you senseless since this morning. 

He’d run away as fast as his long legs could carry him.  

And on the off chance that he did reciprocate, did she really want to do this? Begin a… thing with him? There were so many things to consider and if things soured somehow, she’d lose one of her closest friends.

No, best to ignore those pesky feelings for now and hope they went away. 

It was all made worse by the fact that she’d catch him staring at her when he thought she wasn’t paying attention. His expression was usually unreadable, but sometimes he looked… wistful. 

Longing.

It made her heart ache and mind spin. Their meetings too had felt a little stilted. While they had tea together regularly, they always seemed to be in the chokehold of things unsaid.

Meanwhile, Katara had had regular meetings with Health Minister Chiyo and Social Welfare Minister Akinari and had finalised a proposal to set before the council. It had taken a lot of planning and she was well aware of how expensive and difficult it was. It would involve a complete overhaul of the current system. Even if the council approved of it, it would be set before the lords and she’d have to get a majority of two-thirds for it to move forward. It was overwhelming to say the least, what with all her Ambassadorial duties as well, but she was determined. One step at a time. 

So that day, a few days after the Dragon Riding Incident, she found herself waiting outside the throne room at the far end of the Office Complex, trying not to play with her hair. An attendant announced her arrival and as she walked in, was almost immediately felt repulsed by the literal walls of fire ringing the place. They simmered down slightly, and her vision adjusted. She supposed that she had Zuko to thank for that. A bevy of old men and women were staring at her from around a table while Zuko himself was sitting on an elevated dais, just a silhouette with a flame shaped head piece. She tried to fathom his expression, but he looked impossibly out of reach. The ministers she was familiar with gave her small smiles of welcome, but most were impassive and a couple directed hostile glances her way. 

Straightening the fold of her dress, she took a deep breath and began. 

“Greetings, Fire Lord Zuko and Esteemed Members of his Council. I approach you as Master Waterbender Katara, a Healer from the Southern Water Tribe and I thank you for giving me an audience. As you may be aware, I have been involved in the recent changes to the health set up in the city. With the new alliance between the Northern Water Tribe and the Fire Nation, the hospitals of the Caldera and the neighbouring towns are doing much better, patients and healthcare workers are happier and there are a number of Fire Healers along with Physicians. Also, there are currently sixty healers in the country and we are expecting forty more. While we can station them in the Caldera to further lessen the workload, I have come up with a plan that may benefit the farther away islands as well.”

She looked up to Zuko, in the pin drop silence that ensued. He replied after a slight pause, “We are grateful for what you’ve done for us. Please continue, Master Katara.” His voice was rigid, aloof- the tone he used with other ministers. It didn’t sound like her Zuko at all. 

He’s not yours, he’s not yours.

A little shaken, she continued, “When I visited here many years ago, there was a village on the banks of the Jang Hui river. It was far away from the main cities and had no support. There were no healers and the people tried to look after themselves. It is these people that I am trying to reach out to with the Health For All Programme. The Fire Nation has many talented physicians in its towns. But these are individuals who operate by themselves, and may be inaccessible or too expensive for the average fisherman. With Health For All, we build a primary health centre for every five thousand people and a secondary one for every fifty thousand, located in larger towns. These would be under control of the tertiary centres, one for each region. Facilities and services would get increasingly complex in the latter two. Healers: Water Tribe and Fire Nation alike would be place in the secondary and tertiary centres-”

There were interruptions from each side of the room. 

“And where do you think we’d get the money from?”

“The system works just fine!”

“Are you out of your mind?”

“SILENCE.” Zuko’s voice rang out through the room. “We shall let Master Katara finish her presentation before posing any questions.”

There were glares coming at her from every corner now. Squaring her shoulders, she soldiered on. “This will involve a rework of the existing system and can be done in stages. The money will be diverted from those Government sponsored ventures which have become liabilities and which don’t even offer any benefits for the people. I have identified a few such so far and shutting them down will be more than enough for stage one. The further stages-”

“You have identified liabilities now, have you?” A voice called out from the table. 

Katara turned to see a wizened old man, looking at her through beady eyes. “To be honest, I’m amazed a peasant such as yourself even knows the word.” 

“Minister Han!” Minister Chiyo’s distressed voice came through. Minister Han just curled his lip. 

“Of course you’d defend her. You’re friends with her now. As is the Firelord.” The last part was said with a sneer. “Water Tribe peasant, you walk into our glorious country and try to fix us? Our system? You came here a few months ago, from what is basically an ice shelf. What do you even know? You and all your people would have been dead had it not been for-”

“That is quite enough, Minister Han.” Zuko’s voice came through, sharp and cutting like a shard of glass. “In your great history lesson, you seem to have forgotten that it was Master Katara who saved our life. If you have nothing to do except spew vitriol, we urge you to leave this chamber.” His words carried finality with them. This would be counted as strike one. Strike two had consequences. 

The Minister either didn’t care or understand as his sneer returned in full force. He now turned his attention to his Firelord. “ And why did you put your life in danger in the first place, Your Majesty? To save the life of your… ‘ friend ’?” he spat out. “Oh yes, I’m sure you would have done it for just anyone . And your personal life is your own. But we are talking about Government money here. We can’t just give it away to every lovely lady that catches your eye.”

For a moment, there was silence. Then, the fires all around them soared in a burst of energy and Katara could sense that Zuko was about to go on a rampage.  But this was not his battle to fight. She needed to assert her position. And so, before he could begin, she interjected. 

“Though I appreciate the compliment, there do seem to be quite a few accusations you’ve thrown my way, Minister,” she answered coolly and the fire died a little, as she pulled the attention of the room to herself. 

“Let’s start with the first: I am from the Water Tribe, yes, but I’m also the Chieftain’s daughter. If the South had the same systems as the North, that would make me a princess. Next: It’s true that I haven’t had any formal schooling in the same fashion as all of you, but I’ve travelled the world, met with scholars and administrators. I have also been training for a leadership role in the Tribal Council for a long period and have been involved in Fire Nation politics first as an observer and then a participant for a few months now. The project that I’ve suggested has been envisioned with the support of your esteemed colleagues.”

“That means nothing, you do not have any right to dictate what we should be doing-”

“I am also one of the best Healers there is, and my knowledge of health systems around the world puts me in the best position to spearhead this project. Do my credentials satisfy you, Minister?”

The fire raged on, as all eyes turned to Minister Han. “None of that gives you any right to meddle in our business. I don’t care who you’ve consulted or consorted with. You are a foreigner and you don’t get to tell us what to do!”

“Why is it so wrong to accept a foreigner’s help? We do know a thing or two, Minister. And as Avatar Aang has said, we do need to work together to create a harmonious future.” She was rapidly losing her calm, but she was determined to keep a level head.

“Oh ho ho! So the Avatar’s Girl has finally spoken! I was wondering when she’d rear her head!” The scorn in his voice hit her hard in the chest. “Because that’s all you’ll ever be, isn’t it? No matter how much you pretend-”

Suddenly, the verbal diarrhoea stopped. This might have been because just then Minister Han found himself unable to speak as every single drop of sweat on his body turned to tiny shards of ice, pressing into him, his neck and face and despite the flames all around, a chill descended on the room.

 Katara was now angry. Well and truly. 

Voice trembling, she said, “You’d do well to remember that before I was the Avatar’s girl, I was the Avatar’s Waterbending Master. The youngest there has ever been in recent history and arguably the best there is right now. You hate me and everything I stand for? Challenge me to an Agni Kai. I dare you, old man. Do it.”

Eyes wide with fear, he shook his head rapidly and she let him go. “While we’re on the subject, I expect you to call me Master Katara or Lady Katara and nothing but. I assumed that this would have been obvious given the lessons in etiquette you people go through, but apparently not.” She then paused, her voice finally losing its tremble. Then with a coolness that belied her roiling hatred for the man, she continued, “Do you know why I think you’re so upset?” 

He just looked at her fearfully. So did the rest of the room. “I think it’s because in my list of liabilities to demolish are three of your factories. They produce nothing of importance, they suck money like slime leeches and only serve to pollute the environment.”

“Those were built by my father, you dare-”

“YES, I DARE. You funnel money meant for the common people into building your own vacation houses, you prevent a healthcare plan that would benefit the masses, you insult me in front of the Royal Council and then ask how I could possibly dare to retaliate?”

“Well-”

“ENOUGH.”

There was a whoosh of fire, flames crackling and popping all around them. The Firelord had risen, head piece glinting threateningly. Clenched fists and a broad figure lined by flames, he looked terrifying. A silence descended on the room. 

Zuko finally said, “Master Katara, on behalf of the council and our people, we extend our deepest apologies. You have done so much for us already. This unwarranted attack shall not be ignored. Minister Han,” he said, turning to the man, “You are hereby barred from all proceedings till the time I am done reviewing your position as a member of the council and the turnover of the industries that Master Katara has brought up. Please leave the room.”

“Stupid boy! You underestimate my power! I can easily dethrone you! You defile the purity of Agni’s throne by your pre-”

“That will be all. Lord Han, thank you for your kind words, you are hereby stripped of your position as Minister. Please get out of my sight before I do something I may regret later.” Zuko’s voice was controlled, but there was an edge to it. If the council was scared before, they were downright terrified now. Their Firelord clapped his hands once and guards appeared out of thin air.  

Lord Han was escorted out and Katara took a deep breath. “Are there any other questions about the project? Or should I continue with my presentation?”

It turned out to be a very fruitful session. Many points were covered and there was actual headway made into involving and convincing most of the council. There were still a couple of people who had their noses in the air, but dared not say anything. The vote would be passed in a few days with luck and the next step would be to convince the lords. 

The mealtime bell rang and everyone began packing up. She was already halfway at the door, ten steps into planning how to go about this next venture when suddenly the stiff voice from the dais called out, “Master Katara. A word if you will.”

She nodded, holding her scrolls to her as the last woman ambled out, shutting the door behind her. It was then that the fires around them fizzled out and the Firelord nearly jumped from his position in his rush to get to her. As her eyes adjusted to the change in light once again, she noticed a worried look on his face. 

“Tara,” he said finally, softly, in the tone she knew so well, and she understood that it was her Zuko in front of her now as he gripped both her shoulders. It was the closest that he’d come to her since…

Not yours, NOT yours.

“Are you alright? I’m so sorry that you had to go through all that. Please believe me when I say that most of them love you. My people love you. Spirits, they might just love you more than they do me! I mean, you are amazing and perfect and you’ve been a blessing. Please, please don’t leave - Okay, I’ll just stop now.”

Katara had begun giggling. “It’s okay, Zuko. I knew I’d face resistance. I was prepared,” she said, taking the opportunity to play with his long, shiny black hair. 

“But that man was outright insulting you! I should have thrown him out much earlier,” he said, his face drawn.

“It was not your fight, Zuko. I needed to do this. Besides, you had my back when I needed it. You gave me this opportunity to help people. To do so much on such a large scale. I don’t need your protection as well. I’m not fragile. And I don’t get intimidated that easily,” she stated, looking into his eyes.

“I know, I know you don’t. But I will always be there for you, I will always have your back. I hope you know that.” He said, sincerity etched into every feature. Then, he looked down at the ground, mulling over his own words. Snorting derisively, he continued, “And the things he was insinuating about the two of us… that can’t have been too pleasant either.” 

Katara could feel her cheeks flush, as she managed to let out a “Hmm..” with some difficulty, still playing with the black locks that rested on his chest. He looked sharply up at her and she could not evade his piercing gaze if she tried. Flushing some more, she disengaged. 

“I’ll go for lunch then, see you around.”

She meant to walk around him to the door, but a few steps away, a warm hand grasped her fingers, trapping her to the spot. Electricity seemed to course through her body as she looked back at him. Molten gold eyes greeted her: hopeful, earnest, as Zuko gulped visibly.  

“Well at least he got one thing right. You look lovely, Tara. You always do. And this dress…” 

Katara’s heart had started thumping quite erratically. “Thank you, I didn’t think you’d notice,” she replied. 

I had hoped, but dared not presume.

It looked like Zuko was going to say more, but then a servant came in, calling for him. She disentangled her hand and shot out. She thought she heard him calling after her, but she was too busy cursing the circumstances and cursing her younger self for not having the foresight to chase this wonderful man when it was a simpler and less socially disastrous time. 

And they carried on with their charade of nonchalance, neither wanting to slide off the fragile tightrope they were treading. They’d meet throughout the day and have tea with Uncle Iroh at night. It was fortunate that he was there because extended time alone with Zuko at night seemed like a bad idea to Katara. She really couldn’t account for what she might do, and it was great to have Uncle to gossip with. It had become a competition between the two of them to see who could procure the most of it. She had an arsenal of women at her disposal working across the city and neighbouring areas who heard all sorts of things. 

“I don’t get it. Don’t people understand that they can hear and understand what they’re saying? That even though they’re foreigners, they speak the same language?” she once wondered out loud. Zuko just shrugged. “It’s free entertainment. Why complain?”

Meanwhile, Uncle being Uncle, used his Uncle viles to beat her nearly every day. He also helped her in scoping out which nobles to approach and in what manner. She enjoyed her time with the old man - he was a natural strategist. So, when the vote was passed by the council, she immediately turned to him for advice. Most Lords could be handled with luncheons and walks in the garden. Some others needed some cajoling and minor favours. Her very last card in the tough cases was to mention Zuko in an offhand manner. No one wanted to get on the bad side of the woman who had the Firelord’s ear. Then there were the few who outright hated her. She learned to distinguish between these three categories in the first few minutes of a meeting. It saved her some time. 

And so the days passed. 

It was another evening spar more than a week after the Ride. Bumi was coming along nicely and progressing faster than expected. Katara was sitting on the side lines with Ty Lee and the kids as the two of them went about their routine. She loved these moments, when she’d see Zuko at his most tender, slowly guiding his student through the forms. First Zuko would demonstrate, then they’d go through them together and then Bumi would try to perfect them. 

Katara would discretely keep a keen eye on the proceedings so that no one got hurt. If her attention was pulled by a man with a jawline sharp enough to cut glass and a physique to rival the Sun God himself, then it was her and her problem only. Actually, it was Zuko’s own fault for looking so tempting, she reasoned, power underlying every fluid movement as he wove through forms. Sometimes, when Ty Lee was with them, she’d shoot little knowing glances at Katara, which were studiously ignored. Katara’s interest was purely medical, it had nothing to do with the insistent heat she felt, or the beast in her belly which reared its head up with great interest only in these moments. Usually, Zuko was oblivious to this mental war that he instigated almost every evening, but that evening was different. 

That evening she wasn’t quick enough unfortunately, and the man in question turned just then to catch her gaze upon him. She hurriedly turned away as she felt her face go up in flames. Best not to give him the wrong idea. She was just looking out for their safety is all. As a medic. For no other reason. Definitely not because she was wondering what the droplet of sweat rolling down his cheek would taste like. Mmmhhhh. 

After a little bit of examining the grass at her feet, she deemed it safe to look back up… only to see Zuko shedding his upper tunic. Katara’s breath hitched audibly. She’d seen him shirtless before, but that had been a life and death situation- she’d been distracted. Now, she wasn’t. Scars criss-crossed his torso and rippling muscles were on display as they tapered into a defined valley. Wearing only his pants, he pushed his hair up into a tight top knot. Katara did not know what it was that kept her from spontaneously combusting right then and there.

“Want to see something cool?” he asked Bumi, though she felt like his eyes kept sliding to her instead. Of course Bumi nodded enthusiastically and Zuko started a complicated series of leaps and somersaults, shooting fire out of his hands and feet. He set the swords on fire as well, swinging them with expert precision. It was a masterful display by one of the most powerful benders of their generation.

Wait… powerful bender…

There was something niggling at the back of her mind, but at the moment, she was neck deep in some very vivid fantasies pulling her down like quicksand and couldn’t be bothered enough to figure out what it was. Also, there were two Kataras arguing in her brain at the moment, and they were making a LOT of noise.

-Go and trace his abs.

-NO, DON’T! What, are you crazy?

-Come on, please!!

Suddenly, she became aware of everyone clapping, and was pulled out of her thoughts. Good thing too, because it had begun to feel like sensible Katara was losing. It was a cacophony of sounds of amazement all around her,  but much like the dinner that night, she found Zuko’s eyes burning as he looked directly at her and only her. Heat rushed to her face as she looked on with an interest that she knew she couldn’t hide. Eyebrow cocked and with an easy smile on his face he asked, “See something you like?”

That snapped her out of it. No matter how ridiculously hot he looked, she would not be taunted. “Show off,” she commented, nose in the air.

He then had the audacity to smirk at her. “Well, at least we’re all agreed that I’m the best bender here.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “You wish.” And to the sound of cheers all around, she got up and took a bending stance opposite him. This felt familiar- the number of times they’d done this routine – in battle, evenings between training Aang on Ember Island and later, during that very confusing Summer.

She began the round with an offensive, pulling shards of ice from the pond. These were easily dissipated as a roaring jet of fire reached her in their place and she counteracted with her own water as steam hissed all around them. From further away, she could hear her kids cheering them on. Even before the steam cleared, she noticed movement at the corner of her vision and readied herself. He came flying at her, propelled by fire and she had to cut it off with pellets of water as they met again and again in the middle of a field of steam: red and blue, fire and ice. 

From somewhere far away, she could hear Ty Lee say loudly, “We’re all going in now, to eat candies and play games. It’s JUST THE TWO OF YOU here.” 

They went on for a while and it seemed evenly matched, until all of a sudden the steam cleared from before her, and there he stood: eyes blazing, bending stance in place, all taut muscles and temptation tapering down to a line of hair above his... The beast in her belly reared its head again, insistent and demanding and all of a sudden, Katara found herself incapable of motion and soon, surrounded by fire daggers near her throat.

“I win,” he proclaimed, sounding way more satisfied than he had any right to be.

“Again.” She would not give up without a fight.

The unnatural phenomenon of lost concentration repeated itself the next time as well, as she found herself in close combat with him: far too close to warm skin and blazing eyes. Soon enough, she was lassoed by a ring of fire and after that, and again, the third bout as well. 

Stupid firebender with his stupid attractiveness and his stupid unfair advantage making her think of red sheets and dragon rides and… wait.

If she had been affected that evening, then so had he. She remembered all too well ragged breaths at her back and the warmth of his skin on hers, as he’d pulled her closer, nuzzling her hair almost as if he were breathing her in. ‘I’ve got you.’

It was then that she finally acknowledged the solution to equal the stakes. 

“Again,” Katara said, for the third time, pulling at the belt holding her kuspuk together. 

She heard a strangled sputtering from behind her. “W-w- what? What are you doing-” 

“Too hot,” she said simply, pushing off her top and rolling down her bottoms to stand in front of him in her bindings. When she looked up, Zuko seemed to be choking on his own tongue. Inwardly, she smirked.

“Come on, Fireboy. Let’s see what you’ve got!”

He was soundly beaten within the minute. He grunted out an “Again” from within the ice he was encased in, and Katara grinned ferally, launching the next attack that he was barely able to evade. This was indeed a much better idea. Much more freedom of movement. Also, every time Zuko got a good view of her he would be struck dumb, mouth flapping uselessly open, his eyes sparkling with an emotion she did not want to name. It made her feel powerful, like a Goddess. 

It took him a while, but he managed to recover himself, just enough to be able to defend against her attacks and hold his own. She didn’t know which of them initiated it, but she found herself fighting in close quarters with him yet again, neither wishing to further the distance between the other. It was a dance now, as they circled each other, both trying to get under the other’s guard. 

Katara had thought she was holding her own, but Zuko managed to corner her one last time, and in a moment of inspiration, she swept out her leg to topple him. The fire snapped out and he wobbled and fell, and she pursued him down and locked him in place with bands of ice as she finally proclaimed, “I win.”

“You cheated,” he said, in a voice huskier than normal. She took him in, the gold of his eyes a thin ring as he stared at her with dilated pupils. Her cheeks heated as she took stock of the situation. She was lying atop him, skin on skin, her chest pressed against his in the best way possible, rough skin against her own, her legs tangled with his. He licked his lips and she felt heat coil in the bottom of her belly.

“All’s fair in love and war,” she breathed and watched it fan across his mouth. He wasn’t even making an effort to escape, staring at her lips forming the words as though entranced. She felt the coiling in her belly turn into something more insistent. 

-This is not a good idea.

-Oh shut up.

But before either of the two Kataras could actively do anything, she felt her thigh brush against something. And unless he was carrying a knife in there… She shifted her weight and felt it twitch, rapidly hardening. Her mouth dried up and she stopped all attempts at motion, instead choosing to focus on his lips as he rasped, “And which is this?”

This was close, too close. 

“You pick,” she breathed, and felt one of his hands come up to tangle in her hair- she hadn’t even noticed him get free. 

“You’re leaving it up to me?” he asked her, eyes smouldering. “Good.”

He’d gotten closer than he had been and she leaned in. It felt inevitable, until suddenly, there was a cracking of twigs from nearby and voices reached them, snapping her out of her daze.

“Mom! Bumi pushed me and I got hurt, LOOK!”

“She pushed me first!”

And she was off Zuko like a shot, as he too scrambled to right himself. 

“Oh, you won, Mom? Cool!” Bumi said, as they both crowded around Katara, claiming her attention. By the time she’d looked up, Zuko was gone. 

She was entirely too distracted after that. There was one thing and one thing on her mind only, and it made any sort of thinking impossible. The rest of the day passed in a daze. 

At one point during dinner, she and Zuko reached for the pot at the same time, and she could swear that a bit of static passed through her when their hands brushed. They both shrank back into their seats and she was satisfied to see that his blush was as deep as hers. The sudden awkward silence was interrupted by Uncle. He’d been stroking his beard for quite some time, and now said thoughtfully, “You know nephew, it really is a shame. You’ve had guests all this time, and you haven’t shown them around our magnificent country at all.”

“I’m the Firelord, Uncle, in case you haven’t noticed. I can’t take breaks when I wish it.”

“Well of course. But I was thinking, Ember Island is particularly beautiful at this time, you know, the calm before the monsoons hit us…” he said with a twinkle in his eyes. And this is how Katara knew he was up to something. Zuko sensed it as well. She could see him firmly set up his guard. 

Uncle continued, “They have all those beautiful beaches and hot springs-” and here he looked at Kya and Katara, “They have the best cow-pig meat in the country-” and here he looked at Bumi, “Our old house has those tomes written by Avatar Roku-” he said, looking at Izumi, and finally finished off with, “It’s flapper turtle season too,” this last one pointed at Tenzin. 

Zuko suddenly found himself at the business end of five very pointed glares. 

“Dad-”

“Sifu-”

“Uncle Zuko-”

“Zuko-”

“Please-”

It was a merciless battle. There was pleading, wheedling, bargaining, and some very fake tears. Zuko tried his very best, but he was hopelessly outnumbered. With an exasperated look aimed at Uncle, (who continued eating, the very picture of calm) he said, “Very well. I can get my work done in the next couple of days, and we can leave five days from now. If that’s okay with you, Tara?”

“Should be fine.”

A chorus of cheers went up. And then all hell broke loose as preparations for the trip picked up in full stead. Katara was excited too. She loved Ember Island. The beach, the house, the memories, the possibility of a shirtless Zuko… mmhhh. As if he’d sensed that she’d been thinking of him, he caught her gaze and she turned away, turning a deep red as she did. She’d have to get weather appropriate clothes for this trip as well.

“A very wise choice, Nephew,” Uncle commented sombrely and received a dirty look in return. “I’ll rule in your stead. You can take your time.” 

“Why is there always emotional blackmail involved at this table?” she heard Zuko mutter and stifled a chortle. 

And though the dinner had been a welcome distraction, the Bending Incident played on loop in the back of her head, followed her into bed and wouldn’t let her sleep. She took to reading one of her romance scrolls. Just the thing for this situation. 

The girl – who had thought the guy was out of reach all this while- had just learned that he had nearly died for her. He had subsequently recovered and when asked why he’d done this, had said that his heart burned for her . She’d especially liked this dialogue since it seemed that this was the sort of thing that Zuko would… Anyway. The confession was followed by one of the most delicious sex scenes she’d read. It was exactly what she needed.

Unfortunately, that took her back to her earlier problem. The look in his eyes, the feel of him under her, the proximity… oh how she wanted him, needed him almost. It was insane. 

After another hour and no sleep, she figured that there was nothing else to it. The curtains fluttered and reminded her of the times he’d come to her room. How she wished he’d come by right now. 

Lightly tracing her breasts over the flimsy material of the gown, she began an old and trustworthy routine. 

**

 

 

 

 

She flicked her fingers over her nipples, plucking them as arousal flared through her body. After the day she’d had, it didn’t take much. One hand began moving downwards, sliding over silk and if she stretched her imagination a little bit, she could almost imagine that it was someone else’s. 

  Larger warm hands clutching her waist as he breathed into her neck. She could feel the press of his tongue at her pulse point as he sucked down and all she could smell was the familiar smell of sandalwood and smoke as she arched into him...

Wait. She wondered if she was imagining Zuko…? No, she decided. Definitely and absolutely not. That would be way too much. This imaginary man would have brown hair and black eyes and a round face. Not Zuko. Not him.

She went back to her fantasy, a calloused hand kneading her breasts, as she brought her hands up around his scarred back. A soft breath escaped her. The hand travelling down her belly was his, as he pushed apart her legs with his, and pulled up her gown. 

‘Tara’ a husky voice breathed in her ear and she jolted. 

No, no, no, she was not imagining Zuko, it would be all sorts of wrong and she did not have that big a crush on him, it was all manageable. This was a different man, who did not call her… that name. Ugh. 

She sighed and went back to her imagination. He was now tracing a finger around her opening as he leaned down and put his mouth on one clothed breast. Mouthing at it, he sucked - teeth scraping against her. She half moaned as he undid the fastenings to palm at her without cloth in the way as his other hand made maddening circles around her bud. 

Please,’ she whispered.

He closed his lips around a nipple then, tugging firmly, and she groaned. Encouraged, he tugged harder, until she was a panting mess. Then he let up, lifting his head, golden eyes staring into hers as his hair formed a curtain around them both. He smirked, eyes glinting as he leaned in and whispered in her ear, ‘Getting off to thoughts of me in my palace, were you?’

Zuko. 

There was no denying it. It was his voice in her head and it was doing things to her. Well then, fuck it. She’d continue with where her mind was leading her.

‘Did you think I wouldn’t know, Tara? Did you think I wouldn’t catch you?’

He brought one hand up, along her waist, pulling her closer to him, and she could feel him now, all of him. Everything she’d been fantasising about since longer than she cared to admit. She groaned and he squeezed her even closer. 

‘Or maybe, you wanted to get caught? You wanted me to see you like this,’ Zuko asked her, as he finally, finally touched her there, at her centre. She arched her back off the bed. 

‘Yess!! Right there!’ she exclaimed, completely lost to it all. He breathed heavily, nuzzling her ear and leaving feather light kisses along her jaw as he continued rubbing the bud. She could feel herself begin to be drawn under.

‘You’re beautiful,’ he said, speeding up his movements. He applied his mouth to her other, neglected breast and sucked relentlessly, as he continued the onslaught on her senses.

‘I could never imagine doing this without you now,’ she admitted.

 ‘Is that so, my love?’

Those last two words were like a drug. She could feel herself climbing harder and faster than ever before. Finally, he reached out with his other hand and slid a finger in.  She clenched around it. It was fantastic, it was incandescent, but she wanted, needed more.

‘My heart burns for you, Katara.’

And then she was climbing higher and he was adding another finger and it was the best feeling in the world as she rode them, begging for more. 

‘Please...’ she said, looking up at beautiful golden eyes, and he smirked.

‘You take me so well, love. Look at you, all wet, taking my fingers, what would you do if I..?

He curled his fingers inside her and she arched off the bed, riding wave after wave as the strongest climax she’d ever had slammed into her. It took her a minute to come back to the ground. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**

Breathing heavily, she came back to herself.

Had that really happened? How intense. And with an imaginary Zuko that too. 

She brought her hand back up from where it had been rubbing and pumping furiously, to see it soaked. Ugh.

Katara tried to recall all the Very Logical and Sensible arguments about how going out with Zuko would be a Bad Thing and she didn’t even like him All That Much. He was her Friend. 

She groaned. 

Who am I even kidding? I’m fucked. Doomed to be attracted to a guy who very clearly isn’t even looking for a stable partner. 

She wondered if coming to the Fire Nation had been a bad idea after all. 

by @momochi_owo again. The dress that Katara wore on the Not Date. Thank you so much for this and the cover art. I love it to bits. Honestly, can’t stop looking at it.


Art by @fghartwork on Tumblr. This is kind of how I imagined the scene, so it's PERFECT. Also, I really love your Druk!!

Notes:

And the slow burn keeps on burning. Not for much longer though, so don't worry about that! I'll try to be a bit more regular with updates.
About the throne room scene: I wanted to empower Katara without making Zuko look like an idiot in his own throne room. That scene was incredibly fun to write and the healthcare system she proposes is very loosely inspired by the one in my own country.
About the sparring scene: this scene has been on my mind since ages!! I'm really happy with the way it turned out. The first attempt to write it was shit, but I think it evolved nicely.
And finally, about that last scene... I'm so terribly nervous!! First time writing smut- it was a bit daunting. My beta @myrsinemezzo okays it though and @ofbuttsandbombs has been insanely supportive. Poor thing, I make her read things for a fandom she has no clue about.
Edit: 'My Heart Burns For You' is from the ATLA Chibi one shots!

Chapter 15: Embers Part One

Notes:

This chapter does get slightly anti-maiko in bits.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

They left exactly five days later. Those five days were so action packed, that Katara barely had time to breathe. 

Once she told Ty Lee about the plan, her friend nearly yowled in joy and did a little victory dance. “This is what I’ve been waiting for. We are going to make you look so good, Zuko won’t know what hit him. We are going to dress you up and you’ll wear the tiniest swimwear and come out of the sea looking like a Goddess, oh Spirits, I can nearly see it. My entire life has led up to this moment!! WE ARE GOING TO HAVE SO MUCH FUN…”

“You know that he doesn’t think of me that way, don’t you?” Katara interjected softly, folding her arms in front of her protectively. 

Ty Lee snorted loudly, “He couldn’t be more obvious if he tried. You two are like two hippo-rhinos dancing around each other in some weird mating ritual. Cute hippo-rhinos,” Ty Lee corrected herself, misinterpreting the distress on Katara’s face.

“I- I don’t like him that way… heh… he’s a very close friend,” Katara informed her, tucking her hair behind both ears.

“Don’t lie Katara, it pollutes your beautiful aura,” Ty Lee said dismissively. “Now come along, we need to realise my vision of you in a dark blue backless swimsuit. Or wait- a crimson two piece swimsuit, he’ll probably get a nosebleed, that is if the blood doesn’t go rushing somewhere else, heh…” she continued, speaking more to herself than anyone else.

The kids decided that they wanted to start getting ready as soon as they could too.  Packing and shopping took all of a day because Bumi just had to have that hat to complete his look, Ty Lee was obsessed with finding a blue swimsuit and Kya’s fascination with Fire Nation outfits was getting a little overwhelming. Meanwhile, sweet Tenzin just held her hand and said in his usual serious way, “I’m so happy to be going on a holiday with you this time, Mom.” And Katara’s heart melted.

Midway through it all, she realised that there was an upside to this trip that she hadn’t considered earlier - she wouldn’t be packing Aang’s bags or planning out food and supplies and pitstops. It truly felt like a holiday for once. Not that Katara minded being the one in charge of everything. She still had to handle her kids who’d decided to start a sock throwing fight in the middle of packing and get them all in order. But this was different. It felt like she’d shaken loose another shackle. 

After the sock fight had subsided, a bashful Izumi came up to her, tugging at her skirts, “Can you help pack my bag too?”

And although Katara could visualise the mountains of paperwork piling up, she could also not say no. It went quicker than expected. Izumi – the organised sweetheart that she was, had already picked out what to get. She just seemed to love it when Katara directed her on how to pack her bag. Something which her own kids seemed to find ‘smothering’ and ‘bossy’. 

The kid hugged her at the end, with a “Thanks, Auntie K!” and Katara’s heart melted some more.

Katara had  been too shy to approach Zuko after that night. She kept hiding from him for the next couple of days, sure that he’d see the guilt on her face as clear as day. What’s worse was that recollections of what she’d imagined still got her all hot and bothered. It was a cycle of shame and lust. And looking at his beautiful face made everything more confusing. So she just didn’t, hoping her conflicting feelings would somehow sort themselves.

Finally, a day before they left, he caught her arm as she’d once again tried to rush out of the room without greeting him properly. 

“Tara,” he began in a tortured voice. “Tara, please look at me. Just talk to me. I’m trying to figure out what I did wrong, and I really can’t and it’s driving me insane. Give me a chance to explain! I’ll promise to do better!”

Shocked, she looked up at him properly for the first time in the last few days. He had those dark circles under his eyes again, and she felt a different kind of guilt settle in her tummy. “Oh Zuko,” she said, running her hand over his scarred cheek. “I’m not mad at you. Really. It’s me who is sorry. I… I was just going through something. It’s not important now,” she said, looking away. 

“Tara, you know that you can come to me with this stuff?” he asked her earnestly, leaning a little into her touch.

“ I know… but you were busy,” she explained. It was a half-truth – he had been busy the last few days, getting his office sorted for an impromptu vacation. 

“I will never be too busy for you, Tara,” he said with conviction, and then Katara had no choice but to hug him. He didn’t ask any more questions about what she was going through, but just brought his arms up around her instead. It was like magic. Suddenly, all her cares in the world disappeared. She nuzzled her face into his neck, breathing in as much of that scent of aftershave as she could. 

“I’m sorry for making you feel like I was ignoring you. I hate not talking to you,” she murmured. He tightened his grip on her, “I hate not talking to you as well. Are you feeling better now?”

“Mhhmh. Much.”

“Just tell me if I mess up, alright?” 

She hummed in reply. Zuko’s hugs were the best, she decided. All warm and cozy. Just imagine how amazing his kisses must be… And on this line of thought, she disengaged.

They set off in the early hours of the next morning on a small, nondescript boat. The solution  to less security was sneaking out before anyone could realise their absence or figure out where they were. Too early, Katara decided, staring morosely at the stars which were still out. Sitting on the deck, she didn’t even realise when she fell asleep. When she awoke, she was on the bed in one of the cabins, covered by a thin blanket. Kya and Izumi were curled up next to her. She dragged herself back up to see the Sun now fully risen and Zuko teaching Bumi and Tenzin how to sail the boat. On catching sight of her, he grinned. 

“Good morning, beau- Good Morning.” 

Katara narrowed her eyes at him in confusion and Zuko gulped. Meanwhile, Bumi scratched his head. “How can you think Mom looks beautiful right now? Her hair is a cuckoo-pigeon’s nest!” Katara rushed back down to get herself cleaned up. 

When she was back, she learned that they were clear of Caldera waters and that Zuko had carried her downstairs. She was a bit annoyed that she didn’t remember any of that, but didn’t let it distract her. For now, there was wind in her hair, sea spray on her skin, and she couldn’t keep from beaming. This was her element. This was her time. She stood at the prow and propelled the boat forward at breakneck speed, keeping pace with dolphin koi bounding next to them. After an immeasurable amount of time, she turned around, finally tired. Zuko was leaning against a beam with windblown hair, not even trying to adjust the sails anymore, just looking the picture of satisfaction. 

It took them two days, but they still made record time. 

The house was almost exactly as she remembered it from more than a decade ago. Except this time, Izumi had a room to herself and Zuko took the Firelord’s room (newly refurbished) and the rest made a mad scramble for the rooms with the best view. Katara was left with the one at the far end of the corridor. 

To prevent anyone from noting their presence, very few staff were present on the grounds. This was done to prevent anyone from figuring who they were so that they could enjoy themselves without invasive crowds or a large security detail. There were just enough helpers to keep the place running. Thus, Katara’s first order of business was to get the kids to help out the old caretaker in cleaning the place. Naturally, everyone complained, but she could be quite … persuasive when she wanted to be. 

“No slacking, Bumi!”

“Tenzin, you can explore the garden later!”

“Kya, if you’re going to waterbend as a shortcut, you might want to do this…”

“Izumi, sweetheart, you’re dusting it towards yourself, it should be away.”

The only person she didn’t have to instruct was Zuko. He seemed to know exactly what needed to be done and did it without her telling him twice. It reminded her of the last time they were here. Even then, he had been the one person she could rely on to step up and be the adult along with her. She remembered how this had confused her earlier on, but later she got accustomed to leaning on him. 

He'd help in the kitchen whether it was cooking or doing the dishes, he’d help in organising everyone to shop or clean up. He’d train Aang and then spar with her. Then, in the nights they’d talk. About anything and everything. All this had made travelling without him that much harder afterwards. They had become close that summer. She wondered if she’d known even then… Everyone had teased them at some point. And now, years later - she could admit to herself that this part of his nature was incredibly sexy to her. 

“Nickel for your thoughts?” Zuko asked her, dusting off the higher shelves with one hand and reaching to grab an about-to-make-a-run-for-it Kya with the other. She smiled and shook her head. 

Katara cooked that night with Zuko’s help. Bumi gawked a little, as one of the most manly men he knew meekly followed his Mom’s orders in the kitchen and later helped with drying the dishes. 

The next day, they went to the Beach. Though the summer house had a private beach, they decided to keep that for later. Zuko stayed out of the way under an umbrella, making sandcastles with Tenzin and Izumi while Bumi and Kya made a run for the sea.

Katara wished she could do that too, but a semblance of maturity was needed. So she slid out of her robe when Zuko’s back was to her. “Join us soon,” she said, as she made to leave and he turned around with a, “Sure….” 

She raised a brow at him, but he seemed to have some trouble speaking. He was just staring at her, wide eyed, mouth agape. It reminded her of the sparring match.

  Ah, that’s it. I’m wearing the blue swimsuit. Guess I have to thank Ty Lee again. 

She smirked, straightened her back, and walked on ahead with a swing to her hips. This also meant suffering through stares that random men threw at her, but she held her head high through it all. 

Soon, Izumi and Tenzin came too and they all splashed around in the beautiful clear waters. Bumi had made it his personal goal to annoy the girls and Kya was exceptionally frustrated that she couldn’t retaliate with bending. Tenzin fell over during all this and Katara had to sort him out.  When she finally looked up, it was to see Zuko making his way towards them. He’d shed his robe as well. Her mouth dried up, heart beating loudly. He was shirtless and now glistening with water. He was utterly distracting. Oh, how she wished it was just the two of them here that she could leap into his arms…

This train of thought momentarily distracted her, and she missed the yelling coming from farther in the sea. Zuko did not, and immediately took action. By the time she understood what was happening, he was already half-way there, swimming with powerful strokes. He pulled the drowning girl with him and then carried her in his arms back to the beach. The twenty-something was all aglow by the time they reached, clutching at him more than necessary. 

“Oh, my saviour! Thank you so much!” Katara heard her say, with a kiss to his cheek. “What’s your name?”

“Lee,” Zuko grunted, clearly flustered. 

“I’m Aimi! Do you want to sit with me? We could talk… or maybe do something more exciting?” Katara gritted her teeth, while Zuko made his excuses and Aimi went back to her friends, giggling. 

The nerve!

This happened again sometime later with a different girl. What was funny was that she was in the shallows right next to Zuko when it happened. Once again, he rescued her and was invited to sit with her and her friends. Once again, he got flustered and nearly ran back. Katara could feel steam hissing out her ears. 

Izumi decided that she wanted to swim with her Dad, and he obliged by placing her on his back. She clung to his neck and was having the time of her life, when once again another twenty something squealed for help. But this time, before Zuko could even make a move, there was a roaring tidal wave pushing her out of the depths and onto her friend group of giggling girls.

While everyone else on the beach wondered where the sudden wave had come from, Kya whispered nervously from beside her, “Mom? You said no bending, right?”

“Yes. How fortunate that La decided to spare her life with a timely wave. How benevolent of him,” Katara replied drily.

When this phenomenon happened once again, Zuko interjected with a meek, “Um, Tara? Maybe I’ll just rescue them the next time?”

“ABSOLUTELY NOT.”

He did not dare suggest anything after that, and luckily for them, there were no more drowning mishaps that day. 

After a bit, Izumi, Bumi and Kya found kids their age to play with, Zuko took to reading under the umbrella and Tenzin took his Mom to collect seashells. The beach had quite a few and they wandered about for nearly an hour. This also meant that Katara got more unnecessary attention directed her way - which was annoying. She was about to give those idiots a lesson on how staring was rude, when she felt a strong arm come up around her. 

Zuko was holding her waist, thumb brushing her hip and giving everyone who dared look their way what could only be called a death glare. Katara groaned inwardly at the macho posturing.

Turning to him, she said, “I can look after myself you know.”

“I know. I – I’m sorry, I can’t explain it. Please just bear with me,” he said through grit teeth.

Katara sighed, shaking her head. Then, with a glint in her eyes, said, “Looks to me like you just enjoy holding me.” She then had the pleasure of seeing Zuko turn a delightful shade of red. He tried to withdraw his arm, but she laughed and held on to it. 

No one turned their way after that. 

Tenzin was tired by the end of the day and Zuko carried him on his shoulders, one arm still around Katara as the kids trailed behind them. Izumi and Kya helped her cook that evening and Zuko practiced sword fighting with Bumi in the arena. 

After dinner, Katara was looking forward to some alone time with Zuko, when Izumi started the demand for storytelling. The others didn’t really understand, but then Zuko gathered everyone in the living room and started with the scroll Izumi had picked. As the story progressed, Katara understood the reason for the girl’s earlier insistence. 

Zuko was a fantastic storyteller. 

He did voices and dramatic pauses and just the right noises. He made it an immersive experience and had the perfect tone of voice for it as well, and one by one, all four children fell asleep where they lay.  

Katara was groggy as well, but Zuko shook her awake. He lifted a finger to his lips, collected Izumi and gestured at Katara to pick up Kya. Once the girls were safely deposited in their rooms, they did the same for the boys. Zuko then told her to wait on the veranda as he brought a bottle of wine out of the cellar along with two goblets. 

It was a beautiful night, the moon was nearly full and they had a full view of the beach from where they were seated, a table between them. They talked about the day, the kids, everything and nothing at all. It was nice to be there with him in that moment. To just be.

Zuko. Her best friend. The one person she had treated the worst and the one person she trusted more than anyone else. But there was only so much wine to be had and they had an exciting day planned and it would be absolutely wrong to ask to share a bed with him, so they parted ways in the hallway. 

The next day it was mutually decided that they’d stick to the private beach. She sparred with Zuko in the morning, and he tried to remove his tunic this time as well, but Katara nearly yelled at him to keep it on. He just gave her a perplexed look but agreed. And so they managed to keep the spar as ‘professional’ as possible. 

The children came down one by one, following the smell of food. As they all sat about the table, Katara couldn’t help but imagine more mornings like this, revelling in the quiet domesticity of it all. This was exactly what she’d wanted, all throughout her childhood. Except she wasn’t a child now and this wasn’t just a game. This was Zuko. She’d have to bring herself out of this soon, she realised sadly.

That day, she decided on the crimson two piece that Ty Lee had insisted she buy. When she walked down, the rest were going over some of the books in the library. Zuko was the first to turn around at the sound of her footsteps. He stared at her for all of a minute looking concussed, until Kya pulled him away with a, “Uncle Zuko, Uncle Zuko, pay attention!”

At times like these, she could almost imagine asking him out. She could almost sense a future for the two of them. And she could feel her blush spreading from her cheeks to her neck and further below. Fidgeting with the straps of the top, she turned around to see Zuko staring again at her, though this time his gaze was focused South of her face. Realising that she’d noticed him, he went beet red and rushed out of the room with some harried excuses. It took him some time to come back down.

It being a private beach, they could waterbend that day, and Katara had a great time. They surfed the waves and she took the kids on rides. They held on to her waist as she cut through waves easily. She offered Zuko a turn too, but he stiffly declined. He decided to keep out of the water for a while, so it was just her, teaching Kya, playing with the kids and waterbending them air bubbles so they could explore the shallows better. Here, she found a beautiful, perfectly formed seashell. Picking it up, she made her way back to Zuko. He’d been in a Mood for most of the morning, and she didn’t know how to right it.

“Hey Zuko?” she asked, approaching him.

“Yeah?” he said, still not looking in her direction.

“Um, I got you something.”

“What?” he asked, a little harshly, and for a second there, Katara considered how lame the situation was . I’m offering a seashell to a fully grown man. How childish. Sokka would be laughing his ass off.

“Ugh, it’s nothing. You know, just ignore it. I saw a pretty seashell and I don’t know what came over me - I just had to give it to you because you’ve been in this Mood. But I see how it’s lame, I know it’s lame. So let’s just forget this.” Ugh, Zuko’s sputtering IS contagious, I’ve developed the same symptoms after spending too much time with him.

“Tara,” he said, noticing the seashell for the first time. His face softened, as a peculiar expression crossed it. “This is beautiful. Where’d you get it?” 

“Right there, in the shallows. Do you …  really like it?”

“Well, yes!” Zuko grinned at her, and Katara felt her face splitting into a huge smile. It was childish, but she felt flutterflies in her tummy again. He liked her gift! He liked her gift! She leaned in and planted a kiss on his cheek. “I’m glad!”

“Mom, can you please chill with the flirting? You’re grossing us all out!” Bumi yelled at her from afar and Katara’s face burned.

“Anyway,” she said, playing with her hair and looking away, “Are you okay? You’ve seemed upset since morning. Is there anything that I can do to help you?”

Zuko’s face got very red again, as he coughed and said, “It’s not important, Tara. Let’s go for a swim, yeah?”

They went in the deep, swimming till they got tired. They tried to make a competition out of it – which Katara won. She was accused of cheating, but it wasn’t anything anyone could prove. Then Zuko took a turn playing with the kids as Katara lazed around on the water. She may have also observed from afar the way his muscles would flex when he moved, but again, no one could accuse her of anything.

That evening, everyone helped out in the kitchen and it was Katara who did the story telling this time. She’d say she’d gotten pretty good too, over the years. This is what they did to pass the time after all,  in the cold, cold winters down South as they huddled together for warmth.

They had drinks on the veranda again after that. Whiskey this time. Zuko seemed to be especially pensive as he looked out at the sea. There was something on his mind, and she waited patiently for him to bring it up. Finally, he drained the contents of his cup and said, “We were what you’d call childhood sweethearts. Mai and I.”

Oh. This. He misses her again.

Katara felt the familiar clawing at her chest as she looked deep in her own glass.

“In her own way, she tried to be there for me since the very beginning of our acquaintance. Every time I disappointed Father, it’d be her who found me somehow. Azula and Ty used to tease us and Mom used to laugh. Naturally, you couldn’t show too much weakness around Azula, so whatever time we spent together was limited. But even at that age, I knew we’d be perfect together. She was a pretty girl and she was born and raised nobility. I was a Prince. It was how it should be. It was destiny.”

Katara inhaled sharply at this.  

Destiny.

“We started dating when I returned from ‘killing the Avatar’ of course. I had everything I’d ever desired – my home, my throne, Father’s ‘love’ and the perfect girlfriend for the perfect Prince that I was. But something felt wrong. I could never pinpoint it. And usually, I’d end up blaming my dissatisfaction on her.”

Here he paused for a bit. “ Mai… tried I suppose. As much as she could. But we were both just teens with too much of a responsibility on our shoulders, and we were floundering. She was also raised to be seen not heard and she hated these passionate outbursts. She just didn’t know how to react to them and I grew angrier at her for it. We had some of our worst spats on this very island. We broke up, then made up and repeat. Then I left her to run away with you all. I broke up via a letter, if you’re wondering.”

“Zuko!!” Katara said, exasperatedly.

He rubbed the back of his neck, “Yeah… very classy, I know. She threw it at me when we were caught in prison. Then, she helped us escape. And in return for her momentous sacrifice, I forgot to free her after becoming Fire Lord,” he said, snorting derisively. “She loved me, so she forgave me. And we got back together. How could we not? She was the perfect girl for me. We were so similar – everyone said so. It was destiny. And things were perfect … for a while.”

He sighed. “You’d think we’d work on our communication issues now that we didn’t have a life or death situation going on, but no. And 17 year old me was a shithead going through so much more than he could handle. We fought, we broke up. We got back together and I proposed. And then…” he stopped and looked over at her. He shook his head.

“Zuko?” she prompted.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, looking down.. “Sometimes I wonder if I ever truly loved her. Sometimes I wonder if she ever saw me as more than the boy she knew before he got banished. We made a fine couple I’ve heard, and everything led to Izumi, which is the single best thing that’s happened to me. But sometimes… sometimes I wonder if things could have been different.”

Katara bit her lip. This had not been what she was expecting from the conversation. Keeping her glass on the table, she stepped away from where she’d been – leaning next to him on a railing. Instead, she brought her arms up and around his torso, holding him from behind. He stood stock still in surprise before bringing his hands up to hold hers. She could feel every breath that he took and they stayed like that for a while, till he stopped shaking. She turned him to her, looking in his eyes and holding on to his arms. The moon highlighted his features, and she could make out the sorrow in his eyes.

“I… I don’t think that makes you a bad person, Zuko. Maybe it wasn’t the dramatic love that we see in plays, but you did love her in a way. As a friend if nothing else. That counts for something. Especially in marriage- isn’t that what we look for? Friendship and companionship? Seems like you had both going for you. I may not have known her all that much, but I don’t think she’d want you to keep beating yourself up about this.”

Zuko smiled ruefully at that. “She’d probably tell me that I was boring her and that I should move on.”

“Well you’re not boring me, but you are being unfair to yourself,” Katara told him matter-of-factly. “Marriages aren’t perfect. I think you were lucky to be with someone you could call a lifelong friend. And you’re doing a really good job with Izumi.”

“Thank you, Katara.”

He collected both their glasses and she followed him to the kitchen. They ran through the plan for the next day as he lit the sconces and washed the glasses. 

“Have I told you that you look beautiful?” he asked her and she nearly dropped the glasses he’d handed her. 

“Not in so many words, your majesty,” she replied. 

“Well you do, waterbender. Red suits you,” he told her firmly, but she could see a dusting of red on his cheeks.

Katara had chosen every outfit with care. She’d told herself that it wasn’t a big deal, but it most definitely was. She clutched the red silk of her skirt and said shyly, “Thank you.”

It was curious the effect the word waterbender had on her when spoken by him. Once again, she found herself unable to look him in the eye. Once again, they parted ways in the passageway between rooms. Once again Katara had the strongest desire to follow him into his. She just about managed to close her own door, leaning against it to calm her impulses. She really wasn’t sure how much longer she could hold out.  




artwork by fghartwork on Tumblr! I edited this one in pretty late, so I added it here as well in case anyone missed it!

Notes:

Not super duper pleased with this one, but oh well. Zuko calling Katara 'waterbender' is a hc taken directly from pineapple frenzy's recent artwork, for those who noticed! About Maiko, I don't think this was a very wise choice. For me, Mai was a stand-in for all that Zuko thought he wanted but didn't fit in with who he became post-banishment. It did not make sense for her to continue being his love interest. Instead, they should have developed the dynamics between Ozai's Angels. Both Zuko and Mai could do better.
Anyway, about Ember Island- I loved writing this bit! I hope the family and fun feels came through! I've written quite a bit of the next one before I decided to split them.
Also, there has been a lot of discussion in the fandom on racism recently. As a POC, it has affected me some. I want to finish this work, but sometimes I check Tumblr and am genuinely disgusted. Basically I'm just saying that your hateful anons affect people. If you don't want content creators driven out of fandom, please don't harass them for expressing opinions, unpopular or otherwise.

Chapter 16: Embers Part Two

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The next day they went trekking through the lush green jungle on the island. There were trails made for all difficulty levels, and before they left, Zuko instructed them on what to look out for. According to him it was an easy trek, but there could be some animals and plants on it that they were better off avoiding. Their group didn’t encounter any of those, just a couple of spider-snails that got a bit too close for comfort and a bright orange lizard-snake. Zuko frightened the animals away with fire, but after the lizard-snake incident, Kya stuck close to him, clutching his robes with one hand while Bumi made fun of her. Tenzin wanted to leap out and befriend the animal of course. 

Kya was still in awe of all the green around her and was getting overwhelmed a little easily. The flora and fauna were very different to what they were accustomed to down South, so she and Bumi asked the names of every pretty flower they saw and Izumi the little scholar would answer. When they walked back it was dark and the shrubbery was buzzing with fireflies. It was magical and they were all entranced as the tiny glowbugs lit up the path and drifted off into the distance. For once, there was utter silence from their group.

 When they returned, everyone pretty much just sank into bed. Zuko made a pot of tea for himself and Katara, and they talked for a bit as usual, before heading up themselves. Unfortunately, a fitful sleep was in store for Katara that night. After tossing and turning for ages, she finally gave up and padded downstairs. Picking up a scroll that had captivated Izumi the other day, she went out on the veranda to read it. Time passed and with only the slow rolling of the waves to keep her company, she really didn’t know when she drifted off. 

She woke up in bed with sunlight filtering through the window and sheets pulled up to her chin. There was yelling coming from somewhere in the house and all she could remember was a faint memory of being pressed to a warm body. 

Ugh. Next time he carries me anywhere, I swear that I WILL be conscious. 

She wanted to roll back into bed, but the voices from below wouldn’t shut up. So, pulling her robe around her, she padded downstairs and into the kitchen where the yelling was coming from. 

“NO ONE PUTS THAT AMOUNT OF SALT IN THEIR FOOD, ARE YOU CRAZY?” That was Izumi’s voice.

“LET’S JUST DO WHAT YOU’RE DOING THEN, AND MOM’S MOUTH WILL BE ON FIRE!” Kya. Unexpected. The two of them didn’t fight much.

“GIRLS. THAT’S ENOUGH.” And that was Zuko. “I leave you alone for all of five minutes… That is too much salt Kya. If she wants some more, she can add it herself or the rest of us won’t be able to eat any of it. Izumi – you have no idea how happy I am that you like spicy food as much as I do, but we don’t want to kill everyone else. Now, hand me the ladle…

Katara leaned against the doorway, watching the scene unfold. Zuko was making breakfast with his two helpers, while Tenzin was airbending foam around a pile of utensils in the sink. He noticed her first, “Hey, Mom’s up!”

They all turned at the same time with varying levels of surprise and disappointment on their faces. “Good morning everyone?” Katara asked, a little confused at this reaction.

Zuko was the first to recover, “Morning, Tara!” His enthusiasm sounded forced.

“Mom!! You’re not supposed to be up yet. We were going to surprise you with breakfast in bed,” Kya explained dejectedly. 

“Oh, is that so? Okay then. Back to bed with me!” Katara said, turning around with a smile. “And where’s Bumi?”

“He was supposed to make sure you didn’t come down, Auntie K. He must’ve gotten distracted,” Izumi said exasperatedly and Katara snorted. She nearly collided with him on the way up.

“Guys guys, I can’t find Mom! I think she’s awake!!” he was yelling.

It was like a mini tornado barrelling down, but with expert precision, Katara picked him up. “Come on little wolf. Let’s go.”

There was no more yelling after that, and soon everyone came up with bowls of hot congee. It was still a bit spicy for Katara’s taste, but she was sure to make all the right sounds of appreciation and their faces lit up. The kids crowded on the bed and discussed what they’d do with the rest of the day. In the end, it was decided that they’d go to the hot springs. They all filed out to get ready till it was only Zuko and her in the room. 

“Thank you, Zuko,” she told him.

“I didn’t do anything. It was the kids! They wanted to surprise you,” he said defensively.

Katara smiled at that. “Well then, tell them the food was really delicious. They should cook more.”

Zuko grinned, “I’ll be sure to do that.”

It was an eventful day. The hot springs were as beautiful and isolated as they’d expected. Clear water with steam hissing all around and plenty of large smooth rocks to sit on. Zuko instructed everyone in his no – nonsense voice that there would be no diving or other foolishness. That they would have fun calmly. Katara surrendered her bad-cop duties to him and relaxed against the rock, feeling her stresses and worries come undone. She felt him slide up next to her after some time. 

“We should come back here. I’m going to convince Sokka and Suki to come as well and we’ll have a mini- reunion,” she told him, eyes closed.

“Uhuh.”

“And maybe-” she continued, but just then there was a shriek as Tenzin slipped off a rock and fell in the pool. Katara strode through the water to console him and heal his scrape. It took some time, but the tears finally progressed to hiccupping and Izumi pulled him away. She made her way back to Zuko, sitting slightly closer than she was before. “I stand corrected. Next time, we’re coming here all by ourselves.”

“I’m going to hold you to that waterbender.” Zuko rumbled from beside her and she giggled like a schoolgirl, inching even closer to him. After a while, she felt his arm come up around her shoulders. A little surprised, she looked up to find him very red. She leaned slightly into his touch, just barely managing to not squeal out of happiness. They both missed the glances the older children exchanged with each other.

They made their way back by evening and Bumi started begging Zuko for a training session. Zuko tried to refuse, but softie that he was, Katara could tell that he’d cave soon enough although he was in no mood to get sweaty again after that soak in the hot springs. And that’s when it struck her.

“Bumi, why don’t you ask Uncle Zuko to play the Tsungi Horn for us?”

Bumi whirled around to ask, “Uncle Zuko, you know how to play an instrument?” and Zuko shot her a panicked look.

“Yes, he does! And he’s really good too! He used to play it for me all the time!” Katara exclaimed loudly. That caught everyone else’s attention. And then there were four children begging to hear him play. Zuko wore a betrayed expression that seemed to say, ‘ I’ll get you for that.’

Katara simply raised a brow at him . ‘No, you won’t.’

 And so the instrument was brought out and dusted off. Zuko went out to practice for a while before re-entering. “I haven’t played in a long, long time, so I may not be good. Don’t say I didn’t warn you all.”

And then he started, softly at first. It was a beautiful melody, lilting and captivating. A little sad but otherwise exactly how Katara remembered it. Four Seasons, once again. Zuko looked in her eyes just then, and she was transported to a spot next to a pond years ago, faint quacking of turtleducks in the distance. In her mind’s eye, there was a boy and girl sitting next to each other. The girl was mad at him for something or the other.

“Will you forgive me if I promise to play it for you tomorrow?” 

He’d asked the girl with such sincerity. And then he’d followed through. The girl had been entranced. It had been like magic, the notes spinning and dancing around her on the beautiful summer day. She’d requested that he play it again and again and then presented him with a bouquet of firelilies.

“You plucked these from my own gardens in front of my eyes!”

He’d laughed and the girl had discovered her new favourite sound. She remembered the stirring in her chest she’d felt then. The stirring that she felt now. The song ended too soon. This time, she didn’t have to request an encore. The children did it for her as she discreetly wiped her eyes. 

He began playing again, but this time, the song felt more melancholy than before to her ears. And though the years had done a number on them both, the boy was here. He was so close, yet so terribly out of reach. 

Each of the kids took turns trying to play the instrument. Zuko patiently tried to teach them, but he wasn’t very good at it. He hadn’t been very musical as a child when music lessons had been forced on him, and though he was getting slightly frustrated with everyone, he wasn’t exactly surprised that he couldn’t teach well. Finally, she pulled them all away with stern orders to go to bed, picking up a mat from the storeroom as she did. Prying the instrument out of his stiff fingers, she set it aside. 

“Come on,” she whispered, and he got up, as if in a trance. They walked down to the beach. For the longest time, there was silence, save for the cicadas and crashing waves. Further inland she could see fireflies hovering about.

“This place is beautiful,” Katara said, taking in the starry sky as they walked on soft sands. 

“We came here at just the right time,” Zuko replied. “The monsoons will roll in any day now and in this region they’re quite heavy. The Caldera gets cold winds but lesser rains. I know it’s not the same, but it’s our equivalent of a winter.”

“Rain…” Katara mused. It had been a while since she’d seen it.

They were silent again for some time, till Katara said, “Here. Let’s sit here.” There wasn’t anything particularly special about this patch of beach, but Zuko didn’t question her.

Laying down the mat, they sat down side by side, Katara trying to make sure that no sand slipped into her Fire Nation style skirt. After a while, she broke the silence. “Aren’t you going to ask me why?”

“Why what?”

“Why we broke up, Aang and I.”

“You’re the one who’s always made everyone else’s business your own, Katara. I didn’t want to pry,” he said, turning to her. “But I hope you know that I’m here for you whenever you do wish to tell me.”

Katara found that she couldn’t look in his eyes as she laid down next to him, finding courage in the star-spangled sky. “I haven’t really talked about this with anyone, but the last few months have given me plenty of opportunity to consider how exactly things could go so very wrong,” she said, pausing. The words stuck in her throat and she really didn’t want to say them. But this was a conversation that she needed to have.

“I… I did love him in the beginning. He was my friend. Kind and sweet. He was perfect. He was the saviour of the world and he needed me. Everyone expected it of us. Like you said, it was… like destiny. Am I making any sense?” She was quiet for a while, waiting for his response. 

“You are,” he finally replied. He sounded tense, so she chanced a glance at him. He’d laid down next to her, his face set in that horrible expressionless mask and his eyes focused skyward. Yet, he seemed to be listening, so she went ahead.

“I can’t be sure how or when, but something changed. Maybe I did, or he did or maybe it was a bit of both of us? Or maybe we didn't and over time, simply understood each other better. He wasn’t perfect, and neither was I.”

“He’s always seen me as this idealised version of myself. And I became what he needed. His teacher, his girlfriend, his caretaker, and lately, a motherly figure who wanted to stay at home and look after the kids and wait for him with bated breath. It took me some time, but I finally realised that it was all about him, and I couldn’t keep up. It was exhausting. It didn’t help that he was never there for me: when I needed him. He didn’t understand what it was about that life that I didn’t like. And I had no room to argue.” The words rushed out of her in a breath. 

Zuko leaned on an elbow and looked at her with concern, “Wait. No room to argue?! That doesn’t sound like you. I’ve never known you to take any shit from anyone.”

Katara chuckled, but it was without humour. “I don’t think I was myself. Sokka says I wasn’t. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t all Aang’s fault. I never stood my ground with him. Even when we were young. I always believed him to be fragile. I never corrected him when he messed up, and in this way, I helped found the dynamics of our relationship. And as fucked up as all this sounds, I would have found a way to be okay with it! I thought that perhaps that was my lot in life – I’d done my bit in the war, now it was time to stay home and… and be the Avatar’s wife while he did his Avatar duties,” she finished despondently. 

“Well, Toph and I always wondered why we never saw you at international conferences anymore…” Zuko said cautiously and Katara barked out a harsh laugh.

“My place was taking care of my children, Zuko. I was the Avatar’s girl. Nothing more, nothing less. What would I know of conferences and war and peace?” she asked bitterly. “In fact, the only person who helped me through it all was Sokka. Idiot never stopped believing in me. He kept trying to pull me out of that quagmire I was in.” Her throat was beginning to tighten, and she couldn’t trust her own voice. Taking a deep breath, she carried on.

“But there was a tipping point. The one thing about him that I found that I absolutely could not put up with – the way he was with the kids. You probably know already. I couldn’t bear to see the disappointment on their faces each and every time he left them or favoured Tenzin. It showed up in a million different ways, big and small. And he just didn’t get it. We fought and fought and I could feel the love I had for him wither away over the years.” She didn’t dare look at Zuko as she felt a tear slip across her face. A warm thumb brushed it away, but this just prompted more tears.

“We really got into it one night. He’d just come back with Tenzin after yet another trip. He didn’t even acknowledge Kya’s bending progress or Bumi’s questions about why he was never there. It was business as usual and we fought again. We really got into it, and one thing led to another and he said that it was all because of destiny. It was Tenzin’s destiny to keep up the traditions of the Air Nomads, it was Aang’s responsibility to teach him and Aang’s destiny to be the Avatar and fly around the world and it was my destiny to be his wife and take care of the rest of it. And I snapped,” she said, through teary eyes.

Everything was blurry through her vision then, but she was pulled against a strong, warm wall of muscle. Resting her head on his chest, safe in his arms she cried and cried her soul out. “Why is his destiny greatness, and my destiny to look after him? What makes him so superior to me, Zuko? Why was it my responsibility to be his wife, while he played the hero? What makes me lesser to him? It truly hit me then, that this is what he'd begun thinking. That this is what I had let him think, that this is what I had begun thinking myself!” There were tears and snot on Zuko’s tunic but he didn’t complain.

It was the first time she was verbalising all her thoughts to someone. Her family in the South had been told briefly about what had happened that night, but this was the first time she was giving someone the whole picture after months of reflection and repressing her anger. Zuko didn’t impose on her. He didn’t give any false pity. He simply soothed her, patting her back and holding her tightly. Once she’d calmed down a little, he said, “You are the strongest person I know, Tara, and I do not say that lightly. You're not weak or lesser to anyone. You don’t deserve to be trapped in a relationship where you can’t grow. You’re kind, and good and have so much to offer the world. You need someone who’ll support you and be there for you and… and treasure you. I… I don’t know if it’s my place to say this, but I think you did the right thing. It must have been incredibly painful, and yet you pulled through.”

She wondered at how this awkward, socially inept turtleduck could find just the right things to say to her every time she talked to him. Hugging him tightly she said, “You’re too kind to me, Zuko.”

“I mean every word, Katara. And about the kids … I only wish that he was a better father.”

Katara started sniffling again at this. “Why can't he just love them all equally?! They miss him. Tenzin especially. I can see it in their eyes. Do you think they will ever forgive me for breaking up our family? Because that’s what I did. You should’ve seen the look in Kya’s eyes when she found out it was me who’d left him, and I can’t even imagine Ten-”

At this, he pulled her up, sitting her in front of himself, and illuminating both of them with a tiny flame from his palm. “Tara,” he said looking into her eyes. “They already have forgiven you. They understand. Believe this if nothing else.”

She just looked back blearily, tears rolling down her face. “I promise, Tara. I notice these things. They love you. Tenzin might take a while once he’s understood the entirety of the situation, but Bumi and Kya know what’s happened, and they’re healing. They’re happy for you. Trust me, my information comes from a very reliable source,” he said and the fire brought out the seriousness in his features.

“Izumi?”

“Who else?”

After a bit, she calmed down a little, finally progressing to hiccups and he consoled her a bit more. Tired by the whole ordeal, she leaned her head against his shoulder.

“May I ask you something?” he asked quietly after a while. She nodded.

“Do you miss him?”

“No,” she said immediately. “I really don’t. I mourned our marriage for a long time, and I felt horrible for the kids, but I haven’t missed him in months.”

Zuko was silent for a while. “Why did you stick with him for so long?”

She considered her answer. “Well, apart from the fact that divorce is absolutely taboo in the Tribes? It was destiny, Zuko. I’ve always known he was the one. A fortune teller told me that I’d marry a tall and powerful bender, and there he was.” 

Zuko had the audacity to chuckle at this. She looked at him with mild annoyance, “If you’re going to taunt me, save your breath. I’ve heard them all from Sokka.”

“Oh no, I wouldn’t dare. I was just going to say that of all the tall and powerful benders in this world, what made you think it was him?”

Katara furrowed her brow, “Well because he always went on about how we were destined to be together and that I was his forever girl and… Oh Spirits, you’re right.”

He chuckled at this, and she could feel an odd weightlessness rise in her and she laughed as well, the sounds disappearing into the night air. The stars winked at her, and for a minute she was reminded of the girl and boy by the turtleduck pond. He grinned at her, clearly pleased with himself.

“Destiny is a funny thing, Katara,” he said and she placed her head back on his shoulder, sighing softly as she did a mental count of the tall and powerful benders she knew. There were a couple of waterbenders who were pretty good, a few earthbenders (she wondered if Haru was married and if he still had that disgusting moustache) and then… there was Zuko. 

What if…

But no, she refused to let herself go down that path again. She would not let another woman decide her destiny from now on. If she was to go out with someone, it would be because she liked them, not because a fortune teller told her to. But even then, her mind was spinning. She tried to shut it down, but all that she could think of was the look in his eyes when he’d played that evening. 

“Zuko, I’m tired. Let’s go back?” 

He agreed. On the way back, he stopped by the kitchen to make her a pot of relaxing tea. 

“Thank you for listening, Zuko. You’re a good friend,” she told him.

"Whatever you need," he said simply, a bittersweet smile on his face. Katara wondered about that, but didn’t have time to focus on it. She was out like a light the moment her back hit the bed. 

The next two days passed in a blur as they neared the end of the vacation. They’d spend the day with the kids usually. One day, she took the girls to a fancy spa, and on another she took them all shopping. She and Zuko would spend the evenings together. After their conversation that night, she felt lighter. Free. It was like she’d demolished the last of her shackles and had nothing holding her back. Plans were being formed every waking moment, and she would get herself invited to the next Four Nations meeting one way or another. She also had a couple of things planned for the Fire Nation that she wanted to get started on as soon as possible. Usually, she couldn’t keep her ideas to herself, and Zuko would prove a good sounding board. He’d tell her about the feasibility of her plans and how he could help, while also discussing his. He’d also found music scrolls in the library and had managed to pick up some new songs to play for her as they sat on the veranda. On the third day, the sky was overcast with clouds, so they all stayed in and packed their bags in preparation of departure the next day.

“Looks like monsoons are finally here, Auntie K. You’re going to love them,” Izumi told her. And Katara agreed, she probably would but they just didn’t start. The sky stayed grey the full day, and finally fed up with being cooped inside the house, Katara pulled Zuko for a walk with her after nightfall. The caretaker would look after them for an evening. 

“Where are we going?” he asked her as she strode on ahead.

“To the pier. Been a while since I saw it.”

Katara was proud to say that she found the place all on her own, without prompting from Zuko. They settled on the wooden platform, the seat of so many conversations from years ago. Fears about the war, jokes about their friends, or maybe just a companionable silence. Inhaling the salty air deeply, she said, “I’m going to really miss this place.”

“It’s just something about this island,” Zuko told her. “I’ve been told that it’s a place for reflection and improvement more than once. And it’s true.”

They stayed that way, mostly in a silence that didn’t need to be filled with unnecessary words. It was here that Katara felt the first droplet of water splash against her skin. The cloud had finally burst.

She laughed out in glee, getting up from her spot. Then she was twirling and dancing as more fell from the heavens. Tiny bits of joy all around her. Arms out wide, she turned her face up towards the skies, letting droplets wash over her. She’d missed this. The rain was picking up its pace very quickly and she bent the water around her to make dragons, sending them after Zuko. He laughed and waved them away, now soaked to the bone. 

It felt wonderful, to be surrounded by so much of her own element, even as the skies above her thundered. The rain was now cascading everywhere, and it was difficult to hear her own thoughts.

Then Zuko was pulling her away, yelling, “We have to go now!! Rain is going to get much worse and we don’t want to be stranded here!”

“I’m a waterbender, Zuko!” she yelled right back.

“You still probably don’t want to get a fever,” he reminded her and she scowled. “Come on, I know a nice place where we can wait for it to calm down before heading home!” 

This sounded like a half-decent idea, so she let him pull her on. She made an umbrella around them, and some of the lanterns were still lit inside their glass cases, but it was still difficult to see through the storm. She wondered if every rain shower in the country was this intense. As if in answer to her question, Zuko told her, “The rains are pretty bad in this part of the nation, especially towards the beginning. It’s relatively calm everywhere else.”

They finally saw a roof up front, and he led her there. As he quickly lit the sconces, she realised that they were in a gazebo in one of the gardens. She’d seen it a few days prior; one of Iroh’s ideas and a new addition to the property. 

She dried them both and proceeded to take a seat on the ledge. The rainstorm was still raging outside, even though the inside was relatively toasty. She was yearning for a pot of hot tea, when she heard footsteps coming towards her.

“If memory serves me right, you still owe me a dance,” came his voice and she turned around. Zuko stood there. Eyes twinkling in the torchlight. He had extended a pale hand and was looking down at her softly.  

“Huh?” she asked, non-plussed. 

“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten? The night of the party…?” he prodded.

And she remembered. The night of the party, so many years ago. He’d danced with Mai and Katara’s chest had felt heavy the entire time. She’d done the sensible thing and tried to hide, but stumbled on him instead. 

“I’m not leaving.”

“Well neither am I”

She’d fumed silently for a while before he’d held out his hand in a truce and an invitation to dance. She remembered all too well how her heart had thumped unsteadily and she’d stepped closer to tease him a little. 

 “I will if you ask nicely,” she’d replied.

Memories came rushing back to her, and as if no time had passed, her heart picked up its erratic rhythm. So instead of answering, she focused on the obvious.

“Zuko! There’s no music! And I don’t know any of your dances.”

And right on cue, there came the beginning notes of Four Seasons from the distance. He smirked at her, “It’s the start of the monsoon season here- there’s always a festival. As for the second part - I’ll teach you.” That silenced her and she looked away.

“Please, Tara?” he asked breathlessly, a fragile hope in his eyes, his other hand clenched in a fist. How could anyone say no to that face, she wondered.

“Only if you ask nicely,” she said finally, a slight smile on her lips.

Zuko’s face split into a large grin. Taking a moment to compose himself, he smiled shyly, clearly relieved. Raking his free hand through his hair, he asked in a voice of melted honey, “Tara, Princess of the Southern Water Tribe, may I have the honour of the next dance?”

He remembers, he remembers!

Katara smiled nervously and accepted his hand, “I must warn you though - I wasn’t being falsely modest. I really don’t know any of your dances. I’ll probably step on you all the time.”

“I don’t mind,” he said as he slid an arm around her waist. Pulling her closer, he led them on. This time there was no jealous Aang to push them apart, and Katara let herself wonder what could’ve happened had they had that dance that night. 

For a few minutes, she tried focusing on the footwork and twists and found out soon enough that if she followed the rhythm and the same set of steps, it was quite easy. Push and pull. 

That’s not to say that she didn’t step on her partner’s feet a few times, but he never complained. As the song went on, they sped up and slowed down in parts and she started focusing on his face instead of their feet. He was already looking intently at her. 

“Easy enough?” he asked. She only grinned in response and pulled herself closer to him, willing him to go faster. He complied. 

It was pouring outside and the only lights were from their gazebo. The scent of petrichor was in the air and music flowed from the distance as they spun about in their small circle and she felt like they were in a world of their own. He twirled her suddenly and then, with both hands on her waist, lifted her and swung her around easily. Katara let out a wild laugh. She’d never been carried like this. She noticed that Zuko’s gaze never once slid from her face. 

“What are you thinking?” she asked him, once her feet were planted firmly back on the ground and the world had stopped spinning.

“You’re beautiful,” he said, almost immediately. Then, as though realising what had just happened, his eyes widened. 

Katara chuckled and they began moving slowly once more, “Well, you’re really handsome as well.”

His face reddened even further as he said, “You’re just being nice.”

“Honest!!” Katara exclaimed. “Get Toph here and she’ll prove me right. In fact, I was wondering earlier why you didn’t have more partners! Anyone would be lucky to be with you.”

He was silent for a bit, and she felt a strange feeling wash over her. “Well, I was just waiting for the right one I suppose,” he said with a sudden intensity. Katara felt herself blush involuntarily. She was pulled into his orbit as they slowed down further. She took the opportunity to sniff the scent of the soap he’d used. Mmmhmmm...

“What would the right one be like?” she murmured, entangling her hand with his hair and playing with it. The proximity to him was doing things to her. He seemed to think a little as his hand tightened its grip on her waist. Her skin burned from the contact. Firebender that he was, he was setting off sparks where he touched her, and now it felt like her body was aflame.

“She’d be strong, passionate, intelligent, loving, kind, beautiful and just a little bit crazy,” he said softly, matching her tone, his expression playful, yet there was some truth to his words. Some deep seated feeling in the depths of those golden eyes.

  “Where are you going to find this woman?” Katara asked, frowning a little. There was a heaviness beginning to settle in her heart. It probably wasn’t her. There were so many incredible women in his council and his country, it couldn’t possibly be her. She tried to tell herself that repeatedly, trying to quash the hope that had arisen quite spontaneously. She was distracted by a chuckle. 

Zuko’s hand slid across her waist as he dipped her smoothly, “What if I tell you that I already have?” 

Time seemed to slow down as blood rushed to her brain and her heart beat so loudly that she was afraid he’d hear it. He was everywhere: holding her, supporting her, the scent of sandalwood distracting her endlessly. He raised them up slowly, much closer than he’d been before and she felt his breath tickle her neck. Her own breath hitched. 

“I’d like to meet her then,” she whispered. His face was so close to hers now, and she felt completely incapable of coherent thought. They had nearly stopped moving, golden eyes being all she could see. 

“She’s right here,” he answered. 

Katara’s eyes widened. They searched his and found only sincerity there, along with a feeling that she couldn’t name. Her mind was a mess and she couldn’t think of anything as her gaze travelled to his lips of its own accord. Soft lips, she remembered, and slipped out her tongue to wet her own. He groaned softly, a deep rumble that seemed to resonate from his chest. She looked back up at him to see that he was staring at her mouth as well, his own just inches away. Waiting.

But Katara was tired of waiting.

She reached up and placed her lips on his softly. A quick peck, nothing more, to satisfy the deep seated longing she’d been holding on to. She caught herself a bit later, when he didn’t react. She pulled back, highly embarrassed. He was looking at her with a glazed expression.

He clearly didn’t mean me, he meant someone else. Oh shit oh shit oh shit I kissed Zuko!!!

“I’m so-”

And then he was leaning down to kiss her back. It was slow at first, a gentle press of lips. One of her hands found itself tangled in his lovely hair, pulling him closer as the other felt his heart beat out the same unsteady rhythm that hers was. A perfect duet she thought, deepening the kiss. His other hand made its way to her face. She leaned into his warm touch, sighing softly. 

Kissing Zuko was a heady feeling like no other. It was like she’d just drank an entire bottle of age-old Firewhiskey. She’d be lying if she said that she hadn’t imagined this, but her fantasies couldn’t hold a flame to reality. The hint of smoke on his soft lips, his hands on her, it was like nothing she’d experienced before. It felt good, it felt right and she felt like she could go on forever and ever. Something pressed against her lips, asking permission and slipped in, a hot tongue intertwining with her own as they both got way more into it than she'd imagined. He was persistent, chasing after her, even after she pulled back to draw a breath in and his hands were firm. She was quite convinced she would have slipped to the floor in a puddle had he not held her.

Katara had no idea how much time passed this way, but she was the first to let go, leaning her head on his shoulder while panting lightly. There was silence for a while, save for the sound of their breathing as the rain wound down outside. 

Did that just happen?    

 Touching her still tingly lips lightly, she looked back at Zuko. He glanced at her once, then screwing his eyes shut as though in pain, asked through grit teeth, “Are we supposed to pretend that that didn’t happen either?”

This question surprised her. “Is that what you want?” she asked him quietly. 

He shook his head. “I thought I was pretty clear about what I wanted. Or rather, who,” he said, opening his eyes once again to look at her. He looked so much like a kicked snow puppy in that moment. But taking a deep breath, he dived in, “But if that’s not what you want, tell me so at once and I will never bring this up again.”

Now or never, she realised, looking into tortured golden eyes. 

Now or never. 

She made her decision, lifting her hand to hold one of his. His eyes widened with surprise. 

“I want to try this, this thing between us. What about you?” she asked breathlessly.

He nodded, a wide smile of relief breaking out across his face. “I’d love that.”  

“But…” she interjected and his face immediately became guarded. “But you’re my friend, Zuko, and I don’t want to mess this up. Let’s take it slow? Keep it light and breezy? We'll see where we go from there,” she asked worriedly. If he was only after something like what he had with Kuwa, he should be forewarned, she thought.

“I don't want to mess this up either, Tara. Light and breezy it is,” he said, the happy smile breaking out on his face again. 

“And… let’s keep it a secret for now? Because…” she continued, picking a strand of her own hair to play with, but he cut her off. 

“I understand,” he said, tucking the strand behind her ear. She let out a breath of relief, grasping his hand to entwine it with hers. The gesture made him smile and she realised that she loved seeing him this happy. It made her feel warm all over.

They didn't stay in the gazebo for long after that. The rain had slowed down around them by then, so he guided them both out, this time with a hand around her waist as she bent them an umbrella. She leaned into his touch and was glad she could do it without overanalyzing her actions. On the way he cracked some jokes about waterbenders and umbrellas in the rain and though she knew realistically that they were really bad , she just couldn’t keep laughter from bubbling out of sheer, giddy happiness. 

He likes me! He wants to be with me! He kissed me!

And looking at her, he laughed as well. It made no sense, but she was flying high, and nothing could bring her down. As they neared the house, he took his arm off of her, and Katara missed the contact immediately. The caretaker, having already put the kids to bed, gave them an odd look as they walked in giggling like a couple of drunk teenagers. 

“Good night Lo!” Zuko called to her. Poor Lo, looking very confused, said, “Good night, your Majesty,” back to him. They both giggled some more at the look on her face as they made their way up. On the landing, Zuko caught her hand once more. 

“So no sex tonight?” he asked playfully. She swatted his arm, but felt her face heated up.

“Good night, Zuko,” she said with finality. And then, with an enormous effort of will, she pulled away and shut the door on him. Leaning against it, she closed her eyes, letting out a puff of breath and recalling the events of the evening. Some part of her mind was cursing her for giving in to those pesky emotions. Her heart had recovered from that last ordeal very recently and after months, leaving her wary and guarded. There was a lot of baggage in her past, and a lot in his as well. She was scared, like she was standing at a clifftop. One wrong step and her world would come crashing down.

But this was Zuko. She liked him, truly and she'd take the risk for him. No one could predict the future with certainty, but she could find her happiness right here and now.

She went to bed with a smile on her face. 



Notes:

A/N: We’re done with Phase II of this fic! Now there’s only Phase III left! We still have a long way to go, and these idiots are just getting started. So stay tuned for Painted Spirit shenanigans, Politics, Ursa, some smut and a confession of love that I’m super excited to write.
But before we proceed, I want to thank everyone who has supported this fic with their kudos and lovely comments. So thank you, from the bottom of my heart. I’m sorry that I’m a bit late responding to you all, but truly your kind words make my day.
About this chapter:
Four Seasons is heard in Season 1 and I think it's beautiful. That Zuko plays it for Katara is a head canon from Emletish's Stalking Zuko series on FF.net. It's a fantastic read, trust me! I've mentioned it in one of the flashbacks in the earlier chapters as well.
This discussion on Kataang is something they needed to have before moving ahead with their relationship: for Katara's sake if nothing else. They are now both on somewhat equal terms regarding their past relationships, though Zuko does have one well kept secret up his sleeve.
The gazebo scene is inspired by an old-ish South Asian movie. You could say that it was one of the first scenes I thought of when planning this fic, all those months ago. If anyone figures which movie it’s from, let me know in the comments! Also, I really don't know if there were any couple dances in medieval Japan, so I've tried to keep it a bit vague, if any East Asians have corrections for me, let me know and I'll edit the chapter.

PS: Light and breezy from B99 and ‘tell me so at once’ kinda from Pride and Prejudice.

Chapter 17: Revelations in the Night

Notes:

Chapter is unbeta-ed, I'm really sorry for any mistakes, I'll correct them later!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The next morning dawned, bright and clear. Sunlight burst through Katara’s window and she could hear a parrot-hawk from afar. Getting dressed, she made her way downstairs to the smell of tea being brewed, memories from the previous night swirling through her mind like fresh falling snow. She still couldn’t believe all that had happened. 

Zuko was in the kitchen, slicing up fruit and stirring a big bowl of congee. “You’re up early,” he called to her without looking back, and she smiled.

“How can you always tell it’s me?” she asked, walking towards him, a tiny bit exasperated. She leaned against the counter, next to him and watched him work (she loved watching him work, there was just something so inexplicably attractive about it). Though he seemed focused, and she’d rather ogle him all day, there was a crinkle on his forehead which said he was worried about something.

“Zuko, what is it?” she asked, finally.

“It’s… Well… How did you…” his face went through a gamut of emotions before settling into resignation. He sighed and turned to face her reluctantly, “Look, I’m sorry if I came across too strong yesterday, Tara. Knowing everything that you’ve gone through… I really don’t want to force you into anything you’re not ready for. If you want out of this, just say the word. I promise it won’t affect our friendship. I won’t let it, because you mean too much to me and I can’t-”

He was cut off by a kiss to his lips. Initially surprised, he caught on pretty quickly, and then talking was made impossible. Katara, for her part, thought this was a brilliant start to her morning. His hands slid around her and the rest of the world ground to a halt. He kissed sweetly, breath blowing on her face and though she could tell that there was yearning for more. Katara broke it off after a while, pulling back to look him in the eyes. “Here is my answer. Clear enough?”

He nodded meekly, eyes still trained on her lips. “Crystal,” he whispered, leaning down to try and capture them again so that they could continue. He was nearly there, when they heard voices from the doorway, “I think Uncle Zuko’s cooking again,” Kya was saying.

“Yeah, his congee is better than Mom’s, wonder if she’s up,” Bumi replied.

Zuko and Katara jumped apart, haphazardly trying to find something else to do. And that was how, when the kids entered the kitchen, Katara was furiously eating sliced mangoes and trying not to loudly and righteously proclaim her status as Best Cook and Best Parent. Meanwhile, Zuko was sweet as honey, wishing them both morning and sending her a knowing smirk. Which just proceeded to distract her more, because those lips… 

They left within the hour. It was a bit heart wrenching saying goodbye to the good times they’d had, on the beach and in the house. It had been the happiest she’d felt in ages. But as her hand brushed against Zuko’s, she was reminded of everything ahead of her. A world of possibilities and she was terribly excited.

The journey back took nearly three days. Katara stood at the helm again, steering their vessel as they avoided a storm on the usual route. This time they went past small fishing villages, where they’d stop for the night and exchange stories as weary travellers. The people didn’t know who they were, so they were open and honest about their lives, and she could see Zuko mentally taking notes. She also caught him staring at her more than once, glances which weren’t too secretive and never failed to send a rush of heat up her cheeks. This was probably the reason most locals assumed they were married. The kids were usually near the boat anyway, so she took some pleasure in threading her arms through his, as they shopped for food. 

She finally acknowledged him on the second evening, shooting him a smirk when she knew he was looking. He smiled back, and walked towards her slowly, pulling his arms up and around her waist on reaching her. She leaned into him, letting go her control of the sea for a bit as she let him hold her, arms folding on top of his. He leaned down to trace the lobe of her ear with his lips and she shivered, leaning further into him. Zuko always ran warm, and now with his heat seeping into her, she couldn’t help but think of cold winter nights in the South, some furs and a fireplace in a hut. 

“From what I can see, there definitely is a powerful bender here – one who controls the seas and the very blood in my heart,” he murmured, and she smiled to herself, turning around to meet his gaze.

“Cheesy,” she whispered back, reaching for his lips. This time, when he begged entry, she did not deny him, opening her mouth for him to slip in.  There was smoke on his tongue, and heat lingering underneath the surface, and just for a minute, under the moonlight, she let herself go, the silence shaken by ragged breaths and soft moans. Her arms crept around his neck, as she leaned her head against his chest afterwards. They stayed that way for a long time. 

Iroh descended on them as soon as they arrived back at the Palace and she noticed Zuko keeping more distance from her than she thought necessary. She understood of course. It was too soon to tell anyone about them. “Ah, it’s so good to have children back here, this place has been so dull,” Uncle proclaimed. 

“We missed you too Gramp-Gramp,” Izumi said, rushing to hug him. 

“Yeah, wish you’d come with us. Maybe then Mom and Uncle Zuko would have been less icky,” Kya said, shaking her head. The Mom and Uncle Zuko in question froze. And then began speaking at the same time. 

“Ha, ha, Kya. What do you mean by that!”

“Come on, kids, we need to sleep early now.”

But it was too late. Katara managed to catch the gleam in the old general’s eyes which meant trouble in the days to come. “Yes, yes, you should all go to bed. Speaking of which, are there any… changes in sleeping arrangements to be made?” he asked in an aside, to Zuko, which was heard by Katara as well. It did not help that he accompanied this statement with a very obvious wink aimed at his nephew.

“Uncle!!!” Zuko hissed, face contorting into a mixture of embarrassment and mortification, an expression which Katara felt her face bore too, but Iroh just sniggered. 

“It’s great to see you as well, my Lady,” Uncle Iroh said. “I’ve missed our strategizing. I hope you’ve come up with more plans?”

“Yes Uncle. Let’s discuss them over tea tomorrow?” she asked, trying to rush over and forget the earlier incident. It wouldn’t be until much later that she’d realise that Uncle had called her ‘My Lady’ and not ‘Lady Katara’. The distinction being that the former was used for consorts of the Fire Lord alone. 

The days passed. Katara was busier than ever as a new deal with the South meant that there was more work to be done and her Healthcare scheme was beginning to draw traction. There would have to be some decisive steps taken soon if she wanted it quickly implemented. She’d see Zuko at tea as usual – an affair that now included good night kisses along with the usual discussion of how their day was. Some of these were more lingering than others. Sometimes, Zuko cheated by nuzzling her neck, and then they’d spend more time kissing like teenagers on a date. Sometimes, Katara would cheat by tracing patterns on his chest. This would always elicit a deep growl from him before he deepened the kiss. His kisses were like nothing she’d ever experienced, and they’d never fail to send sparks through her body. 

More often than not, they’d meet passing each other in the hallways, in a rush to somewhere or the other. Most days she’d wave at him, but she knew his timetable like the back of her hand and it wasn’t a coincidence that she always ran into him before the bigger meetings. She’d wish him luck, smoothing his robes before he went into the chamber. She’d derive great pleasure from watching the stress bubbling behind his eyes simmer and settle on seeing her. But they were still in public, so all he’d show outwardly was a small smile. It was in these moments that she wished that they didn’t have to be so secretive, that she could just lean up and… Later, he would thank her properly, lips tasting of jasmine or ginseng and she felt like she could get addicted to the taste of it. “You’re my lucky charm,” he told her one evening. “How did I even manage without you?” he asked and she flushed with happiness. 

Some days, it was he who intercepted her. After all, he knew her schedule as well. He’d make formal small talk in front of his ministers, eyes smouldering as he pushed a stray lock of hair behind her ear. She loved it when he did that, hand lingering a touch too long against her skin, making it tingle. She’d always have a fantastic day after that, although she’d chide him later for being so obvious. All he’d do was laugh, “I can’t resist!” 

The palace was rife with rumours about the two of them, Katara was very aware. The maids especially, were very audible in their adoration. 

“They went to Ember Island as a family, A FAMILY-”

“Saw them on Ember Island last week…”

“He couldn’t take his eyes off her-”

“Have you seen the way he looks at her here as well?”

“The way she blushes when he touches her slightly-”

“And I heard she got so angry when any other woman tried to pay him any attention-”

“Looked like a little family-”

“They meet every evening for tea -”

“Do you think they’re going out already?”

It was not just the maids, it felt like everyone in the Palace was slightly more courteous to her. This was most evident in the lords who thought they could curry favour by flattering her (she and Zuko had a good laugh about them on most days).

All this was not helped by the fact that Iroh kept her company with tea every single day. He’d treat her warmly, and introduce her to his friends and the rumour mill would start spinning. 

The kids weren’t immune to it either. She saw sidelong glances thrown at Zuko as Bumi and Kya visibly struggled with accepting that their mother might be dating Uncle Zuko. The same Uncle Zuko who’d become a father figure to them and accepted them. They loved him, but were understandably more guarded, unsure of what it would mean for all of them in the long run. However, neither was brave enough to bring it up. Katara, herself still didn’t know how to broach the topic. Meanwhile, Tenzin had become more surly towards Zuko and had begun asking about his father quite often. Katara had been forced to write Aang a letter requesting him to take Tenzin for a trip. She had also had to have a very necessary and long overdue conversation about the nature of her relationship with Aang.

The dinner table was quiet that day. Tenzin wasn’t touching his plate. 

“Do you want me to tell the cooks to make something else? Eat something, Tenzin,” Zuko chastised him gently, not knowing what had gone down earlier.

“You’re not my dad.”

Deathly silence on the table. His siblings started-

“Ten-” 

“Tenny-”

“I want to meet Dad, where is he?” The boy was adamant.

“He can’t come right now, snow pup, he’s stuck in urgent Avatar business at the Northern Water Tribe,” Katara told him apologetically. 

“Ugh! He’s not coming because of you! You’ve ruined everything!” Tenzin screamed before storming away. Katara recoiled, arms folding around herself protectively. 

“He doesn’t mean it, Mom,” Bumi said, getting up from his spot to hold her. Katara sniffled. It wasn’t like Tenzin to yell at all, he was such a gentle and pensive soul. And even if he hadn’t meant it, what he’d said was true. She had ruined everything. She almost didn’t catch the nod he threw at Zuko before pulling Kya along with him. 

“Don’t worry, Mom. He’ll be fine. We will all be fine,” Kya told her with a squeeze to her shoulder before running out behind Bumi. Izumi followed a bit later, with a half-smile thrown her way. She’d been even more friendly with Katara since the rumours started, going out of her way to spend time with her and looking very pleased when Katara fussed over her or approved of something she did. 

Katara sat with Zuko and Iroh in silence after everyone had left, appetite disappearing. Finally, Zuko ventured softly, “Tara…” but she just shook her head at him. Iroh interrupted.

“Nephew, can you get us that tea blend from my quarters? The one I told you about? I think this is as good a time as any to open it,” Iroh commanded and the Fire Lord complied with a worried glance her way. Once he’d left, she felt the old man’s attention turn to her, yet for the longest time, she didn’t venture a single word. Attendants came and quietly cleared the dishes away, and still they sat in silence. 

“What should I do, Uncle?” she asked finally, with no one else to turn to for advice.

“Well that’s a direct question,” the old man chuckled. “And since we don’t have much time before Zuko returns, I’ll give you a direct answer.”

Katara looked at him expectantly, wondering when the long and drawn out tea metaphors would begin. 

“Be happy,” he said without skipping a beat, and she was thrown by the bluntness of it. “It’s the only thing that matters. Does my nephew make you happy?” he asked her and she could feel those experienced golden eyes see right through her. There was no point in hiding it from him.

“Yes. He does. Very much,” Katara admitted. Iroh’s face lifted immediately. Alarmed, she continued with, “We don’t know where this will lead, we don’t know how serious this could be. We’re not rushing into anything and now, with Tenzin…” she said, dropping her head in her hands. 

“Nothing good ever came easily, my dear. You mean a lot to Zuko, I can tell. If he truly does make you happy, you will need to work together to move forward.” Katara raised her head at his words. He continued, looking directly in her eyes, “You have raised your children well, my Lady. They will come around. This is but the first challenge in a long series. And you will have to decide every time if you are happy, if what you have with Zuko is something you are willing to fight for.”

Katara blinked, and then nodded at him. “Thank you, Uncle. I needed to hear that.”

He grinned cheekily at her, “That advice wasn’t free, my dear. Come, play Pai Sho with this old man some time. I’m afraid my own nephew thinks very little of the game.”

And as though summoned by the spirits, just at that moment, said nephew burst into the room. “Uncle, I looked everywhere, I can’t find your stupid tea!” he raged.

“Oh yes, I remember now!” Iroh exclaimed theatrically, getting up from his seat with surprising fluidity. “Piandao and I finished it the other day. I’ll just take my leave,” he said rushing out the side door as Zuko looked about ready to explode. But just then, Katara giggled, and his attention shifted to her. 

“Tara…” he said, and she sighed softly, patting the spot next to her. He took it, and she rested her head on his shoulder. He brought his arm up around her.

“Are you going to break up with me?”

“We need a game plan.”

Both spoke at the same time, and Katara chuckled. “No, you’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

“Good,” he replied, his whole body sagging with relief, “You had me worried there for a while.” 

It was Izumi who found Tenzin a few hours later on one of the terraces of the palace. Katara didn’t have all the details, but she’d talked to him for a while before Bumi and Kya found them and they all came down much later, just when Zuko had begun thinking of sending a small army in search of them. 

“We need to discuss this,” Bumi said, in his own version of the Chieftain Sokka Voice, arms crossed across his chest as everyone gathered around in the antechamber to Katara’s quarters, looking various levels of uncomfortable and displeased. Katara sighed.

“Zuko and I are friends, very good friends,” she began, and eyebrows rose. 

“So you aren’t-” Kya began.

“Let me finish,” Katara interrupted. “Lately, we’ve found that we care for each other in a way that goes beyond friendship. I cannot guarantee where this will lead us later, and it’s still very new. I… I don’t know how to explain this, other than…” she trailed off looking at Zuko. He smiled at her, in a way that was supposed to be reassuring, but belied his own nerves. She took his hand in hers, it gave her the courage to say the next few words.

“He makes me happy. And I want to try this,” she finished, not knowing what else to say. There was a pause, as everyone pondered her words. Then Zuko spoke up. “She makes me happy as well,” he said, gripping her hand more firmly. “And I promise never to hurt her or any of you,” he said, looking at the three of them with utmost sincerity. Both of the elder children perked at this. It broke Katara’s heart just a little bit.

Bumi nodded, then called out, “Team, huddle! Sorry Izumi, not you this time.” The girl frowned, but stayed back. Then she bounded up to Katara and hugged her, a wide grin on her face, “I’m glad it’s you, Auntie K,” she said into her shoulder. Katara held on to her like a lifeline, as Zuko ruffled her hair.

Next to them, the huddle was broken, and Bumi announced, “We’re okay with this, because Uncle Zuko is cool and because he makes Mom happy and because he has a dragon we are going on rides on,” he said in his no-nonsense voice. Kya didn’t look too sure about the dragon ride, while Tenzin looked sullen.

“That’s still a no, Bumi,” Zuko reminded him.

“Then the council will have to reconsider,” Bumi said, pretending to think it over.

Zuko sighed, defeated. “Fine.”

Bumi extended his hand to him, “Just so we have our understanding, man to man.” Even at twelve, his eyes were serious, and had more meaning behind them. Zuko shook it, seeming to understand. 

Katara interrupted the moment. “Just to clarify, you are not supposed to tell anyone about this. You’re all big kids now, you know how to keep a secret.”

“What are we supposed to hide? That Uncle Zuko is your boyfriend? Everyone knows it already, Mom!” Kya exclaimed. 

“Everyone suspects it, my Star. No one except us and Gramp Gramp knows .” Four tiny faces nodded in understanding. There weren’t many more questions, and Katara’s initial worry led to a small amount of relief. They'd take some time getting used to it, but just maybe... it would all work out. And she began smiling slightly. 

When they’d all left, Zuko sidled up to her, “Looks like I’m your boyfriend, Tara.”

Katara’s face went up in flames. “Oh, just shut up and hold me. And stop looking so pleased,” she chided, but she was smiling as well.

Later that night, she felt a small body crawl up in bed next to her. “I’m sorry for today, Mom,” Tenzin whispered. “I just want to see you happy as well.” 

Katara’s breath caught in her throat. “I love you so much, baby. So much,” she whispered back, hugging him tightly. It was unfair she decided, that her children would have to grow up so quickly for her sake. The situation did not make her happy either, however... Zuko would make a good father figure to them, and they'd have a complete family for once. It would all be worth it. 

And then things settled, for a while. Her children were still wary of Zuko, and it hurt her to see the earlier obvious love and trust they had for him fade a little. It was obvious in little ways: when Bumi and he had their swordbending lessons, when Kya and Tenzin sat with him around the turtleduck pond. Everything was slightly more awkward, slightly more strained. And she knew it hurt him as well, but he didn’t complain. 

A few days later, she went for a visit to the hospital. These had become increasingly rare over the months, but everyone still celebrated her arrival. She was brought up to speed on the goings on of the new medical education department she’d opened which incorporated Water Tribe healing and also saw the chronic patients. There was always something so enjoyable and soothing about healing, and there was a lot she got done that day. Satisfied, she was about to head out around evening, when Chief Physician Nakamura called her aside. “One tea before you leave?”

She nodded and stepped into his office. He was courteous as always, but this time she sensed that there was a hidden purpose to the meeting. Tact and patience did not come as easy to her as they did General Iroh, but she tried her best. Eventually, he said, “If you haven’t guessed it already, there is something that I need to discuss with you.”

“You have my full attention.”

“I debated this the entire day. Whether to say something or not. You might brush it off as unfounded claims. The person they involve is quite powerful after all.” Katara’s brow scrunched in worry. 

“What I’m about to tell you, has to be handled with utmost discretion. I cannot trust anyone with this knowledge. But you – you’re not from here. There is no way you could be connected to this person, and you’d never fail to act, so there’s some hope.” Nakamura sighed, rubbing his face as Katara leaned forward.

“The hospital needs supplies to function. Powders, pastes, bandages - they don’t spring from the ground. There is one Minister for each province who oversees this. For months now, our supplies have dwindled. Earlier, we made do, but now it’s increasingly hard to come across all the goods which should have been easily accessible to us. When I checked this with the accounts department, they said that we were getting all the supplies we had been allotted. And after some uhh not very legal digging,” he said, scratching his face, “It turns out that what we have been given is a fraction of what we ought to get. Patient care is being compromised, it is heartbreaking when we don’t have the medicines at hand when required. Some incidents could have been avoided.”

Katara’s eyebrows rose. “So then where-”

“Don’t you wonder, Ambassador. How mercenaries and terrorists are always so well stocked?” 

There was silence for a while, as Katara chewed on what had been said to her. She was rapidly beginning to see red. Then, “The Minister in charge, is it Yoshida?” she asked, thinking of the kindly looking man who’d stood beside Izumi and welcomed them all to the Palace. Nakamura nodded, even as he looked furtively at the door, as though expecting him to pop out at any moment. “Please be careful, Lady Katara. This man is not to be trifled with.”

“Well the good news is, Chief Physician, I’m not someone to be trifled with either. And now I’m angry,” she said hotly. “One last question. Why haven’t you gone to Zuko with this directly?”

Nakamura turned his gaze downwards, looking miserable. “I did. A month ago.”

Icicles spread from her fingertips, coating the table and everything on it.

Katara stormed back to the Palace, fire in her eyes as a trail of ice followed her footsteps. Courtiers and servants parted in front of her, like the waves of the sea. Doors opened, and people whispered. She did not register much on her walk to Zuko’s office, except that there was an Imperial Firebender blocking her way. “He’s… he’s in a meeting,” he squeaked. All she had to do was raise an eyebrow, when he said, “Right away Lady Katara, right away.”

This door too opened, and she walked into Zuko listening to the Minister of Agriculture and his retinue. She caught the tail end of the sentence, as the man droned monotonously, “We do not need to worry about rice this year and can go on with the taxation plan of the last 5 years which involves-”

This was when Zuko spotted her. “Ambassador to what do we -“

“This is urgent,” she stated, as calmly as she could. Zuko stared at her.

“Dear woman, you must see that we are in the midst of something important!” the old minister exclaimed, when he was cut off. 

“You heard her, this is urgent. Everybody, out!” the Firelord commanded. 

After some shuffling, the door shut behind them, and Zuko turned his attention to her with a small smile, “I must thank you for saving me, I suppose. Any longer and I would have gone insane-”

“You know that the hospitals aren’t stocked well.” It wasn’t a question. Zuko’s eyes sharpened. 

“What are you going to do about Yoshida? Why haven’t you done anything yet?” she demanded, and his shoulders fell. 

“Nakamura,” he stated.

“That’s not the point, Zuko.”

“I’m doing something, I really am-”

“There haven’t been any legal proceedings begun against him, what exactly are you doing?”

“We have to be careful-”

“You are the FIRELORD. You are the ruler of this nation! People are dying! Why do you have to be careful -”

“Because he’s got too much power alright?! The entire problem with this messed up system is that individual lords have nearly small armies prepped and ready to go! What stops this country from imploding is holding them all together! Father and grandfather did it with fear and bloodshed, but they all know I don’t do that! This man knows the weak points of the Palace, he knows when and where our children are at nearly all times of the day!”

There was silence. Sharp enough that Katara could’ve heard a pin drop. “So you’re going to do nothing,” Katara said, disgust colouring every word. Zuko flinched back. 

“Tara, wait. Listen …-”

“Don’t call me that,” she snapped. Zuko looked torn and deeply upset. As he should, she thought. 

“Coward,” she spat out. Then turning on her heel, she stalked out of his chambers. 

The rest of the day was spent in the confines of her room, brainstorming. Zuko was right in that this matter needed tact. And irrefutable proof that this man was stealing. That would give enough rights to the Firelord to seize his land and people and dive into legal proceedings quickly. The more she thought about it, the more she realised that there must be documents about exactly what supplies are taken, for accounting purposes if nothing else. If only she could just get her hands on them… 

Her gaze fell to the red nightdress hung outside her wardrobe. 

She skipped dinner, using the time to perfect her outfit. There was enough paint in Bumi’s room to paint the Palace red, along with a very broad brimmed hat that she hadn’t seen him wear after the first day at Ember Island. For the finishing touch, she tore a piece of gauzy material from the curtains of her room. 

It was a full moon night, which would work in her favour should she need it, she decided, sliding out of the secret route Zuko had shown her earlier. Zuko… she still hadn’t fully processed her disappointment in him. She was well and truly rattled, and well on her way to questioning every single thing she knew about him. 

“Fucking asshole, acting brave and kind and strong and perfect. Deceiving innocent women,” she muttered under her breath as she rushed to what she knew were Minister Yoshida’s quarters. She knew the basic layout, having been there for lunch. Zuko was right, there were a lot of guards doing the rounds. She whipped up a slight mist and slipped into the first room she could get into. This turned out to be the guest quarters. Which meant, to get anywhere close to his personal office, she’d have to slip past a lot more guards and walk across the length of this very large house. 

It wasn’t too difficult, as she slowly made her way. The soldiers were all wearing heavy armour, making them easy to spot and get past. Soon, she found herself in one of the meeting rooms, and the real search began. This was slow going, sifting through stack after stack of scrolls, in all the many rooms. She had to give it to Yoshida. He was a meticulous man. 

As she worked through the scrolls in the third storeroom, there was a clinking at the window. Dropping the paper, she hid behind a column. This must be a different kind of guard, she decided. The standard ones around the house could be heard from a mile away. 

A body in black dropped in, soundlessly. She couldn’t make out the face, but there were two swords strapped to the back. A ninja, she realised, pressing into the shadows as the man walked in her direction. Go away, go away, she willed, but he seemed intent on passing by her hiding spot. 

Realising there was nothing to it, she struck a bending pose. Water flowed out of her pouch and manacles formed around the man and he toppled with a thud, his face turned towards her. 

Except his face looked like a demon.

She barely held in a gasp. It was a mask. A blue mask. The blue spirit. She remembered from her travels all those years ago. He’d been a wanted man in the Fire Nation. Sokka had looked up to him as a highly skilled swordsman and he’d even saved Aang’s life. According to all the rumours he was dead, the bounty on him retracted, except apparently he wasn’t. He was instead, sprawled out on the floor, incapacitated and staring at her through those black eyes.

“Tara…?” he whispered, and Katara startled. She knew that voice, she heard it every day, except how could it be…? 

“Who’s there?” a guard called sharply from outside.

Katara unfroze the manacles and pulled the Blue Spirit/Zuko hybrid into her hiding spot. The guard searched the room and left as both held their breaths. Then, wordlessly, she pulled off her hat with one hand, tugging on his mask with the other. It wouldn’t budge.

“It’s me, Tara,” he whispered.

“How-?”

“Not now, we need to get that damn document today before he moves its location again. I have a fair idea of where it could be. Come,” he whispered, moving in the direction she’d come from.

“That’s the guest-”

“Yes, I know. He’s quite intelligent. It was the last place I would have searched as well. That’s why it took me so long to get to it.” 

Katara’s mind was reeling. She could barely comprehend the turn her night had taken. Then she remembered. That night in the palace, by the fountain. Many, many moons ago. 

“Zuko? What are you doing here? It’s past midnight!”

“I could ask you the same? And it’s MY palace.” He said, stepping out of the shadows.

“Why are you wearing- Oh wait. You were sneaking out, weren’t you?”

“What gave me away? Was it the black clothes?” 

The number of times she’d found him sneaking back in from near the old and abandoned fountain dressed in black. The number of times she’d seen him with unexplained wounds. That one time he’d nearly died in front of her. She’d always wondered and nagged at him, and here she had her answer. 

“Have you always been the Blue Spirit?” she asked him as they rounded another corner.

“Have you always been the Painted Lady?” he retaliated and she chuckled softly. 

“We really are a match, aren’t we? When were you going to tell me?”

“Never,” he said decisively and she swatted his arm. They ducked into an empty guest room and he pulled a lever to expose a hidden passageway with a room at the end. It was stuffed with scrolls. Yoshida, it turned out, was involved in a lot more than they’d thought. 

“I thought you weren’t going to take any action,” she said.

“I never said that, I said we just had to be more careful.”

As they went through scroll after scroll, Zuko told her about the case. He’d been aware of this for a few months, but couldn’t take any action because that would endanger all of them. He’d sent his spies to figure out the most likely location of the documents and then investigated the house himself. Katara was stunned. But more than that, she also felt guilty and slightly betrayed.

“I’m sorry for doubting you,” she said quietly.

“Not your fault, you didn’t know,” he said, rifling through the drawers. She wished she’d begun this conversation when she could actually read his expressions, but now she had to make do.

“Why didn’t you tell me all this before?” she asked quietly.

The mask turned to look at her with soulless eyes. “I didn’t want to put you in danger. You already have a lot on your plate-”

“And you don’t?”

There was a pause. “You’re my closest friend in the world Zuko. Don’t keep these secrets from me, please,” she begged. And Zuko nodded, seeming to understand as he leaned forward and touched his forehead to hers, the glow of the single lamp illuminating the room strewn with papers. She wished she could’ve seen the look in his eyes at that moment.

“I… fine, I will.”

And just like that, her mind seemed to clear, and she could breathe more freely than she had the entire evening. They went back to going through the papers, with Katara sidling slightly closer to him. Finally, Zuko let out a sound of victory. “I’ve got it. Let’s go.” 

They made their way out, through layer after layer of security. At one point Zuko grumbled, “Easier with you here. The mist helps.” Katara smirked at this.

Unfortunately, at that very moment, they were spotted. One stray guard that they hadn’t accounted for raised the alarm. “INTRUDERS!”

And then they had an entire platoon descending on them. Katara whipped the mist thicker, freezing the farther away soldiers to their spots and pulling Zuko along as he engaged with the remaining ones and parried their attacks. They were nearly clear, when Katara turned back to see a guard lunging at Zuko’s unguarded side. He was battling three others at once, so he wouldn’t be able to leap out in time, she realised with dawning horror. Time seemed to slow as she understood what would happen without it happening.

And that is when she acted. Out of desperation. Out of fear. The one thing that she swore she wouldn’t continue in a fight. Under the moonlight it came to her naturally, and like puppets, all four soldiers stilled. Their eyes widening with fear as they fruitlessly searched the fog for the source of this otherworldly power. It was difficult to keep up this level of concentration, and she knew that she couldn’t hold them for too long, but it was enough time for Zuko to slip out and pull her with him. They ducked past their exit and flew through dark alleyways before reaching the Palace Wall. He leaped over it,  graceful and agile, pulling her up as well. They were soundless as they crept past the guards and back into Katara’s room and she let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding, collapsing on the floor. 

“This was fun,” she proclaimed, tossing her hat on the table. Zuko grunted. She looked over to see him hunched over, cradling his arm.

“Do you mind-” he managed to ask, before she was pushing him onto the bed, and stripping him of his upper tunic. “You know this is not exactly what I had in mind for our first time,” he said ruefully.

“Oh, hush” she said, pulling out the water to begin healing him. He untied the mask with his other hand and it clattered to the floor. She looked over at him, as the moonlight threw his features into sharp relief. Not for the first time she thought, “You’re beautiful.”

He blushed, golden eyes dancing, “Focus,” he chided her. But it wasn’t a very big wound and didn’t take much of her focus. Which was why, soon she found her hands wandering. They travelled from his upper arms to the muscles in his chest and slowly downward, tracing every crest and trough on his body. He made a sound that was almost inhuman. “Careful, waterlily.”

“Waterlily? A new nickname?” she giggled. He placed an arm around her and reeled her in between his legs. 

“You like it?” he asked huskily. 

She hummed an affirmative, but there was still something else on her mind. 

“Zuko… about this morning…”

“I told you to let it go,” he said looking up into her eyes. 

“I’m sorry, for doubting you,” she whispered.

Placing his palm atop one of her own, he dragged it up to his chest. She could feel his heart racing. “Make it up to me then.”

She was pulled into his orbit, and the next thing she knew was that his lips were on hers, and he was kissing her, with a passion she hadn’t seen before. He traced her lips which parted for him, and then he was dipping his tongue in her mouth. The room was filled with the sounds of ragged breaths. 

“That was my favourite nightgown of yours,” Zuko complained between kisses. Then, winding both arms around her, pulled her onto the bed. Her hands trailed over his chest, over everything she’d dreamed of touching for a very long time and he nearly growled. This was dangerous uncharted territory. This was terrifying. This was exhilarating. 

Emboldened, she pushed herself further into him, dazed and drunk and wanting more. And he clutched at her, now kissing down her neck, leaving heat and open mouthed kisses as he went. 

They were rapidly reaching the point of no return, Katara realised, arching her neck for better access. The thought was faintly buzzing at the back of her head, but she was too busy revelling in the hardness against her thigh, in the hands that were now cupping her breasts, in the harsh sounds her boyfriend had begun making in an effort to control himself. 

Even so, with every ounce of willpower she had, she pushed away, “Promise me you won’t engage in this Blue Spirit business without telling me. Promise me you won’t keep this a secret from me!” she said forcefully.

Zuko’s eyes were unfocused, pupils blown wide, as he mumbled, “Tara...?”

But she held her stance, pushing him slightly away from her.

“You don’ t fight fair!” he complained. She kissed him once more on the cheek, her eyes searching his patiently. 

“Fine, I promise,” he said, giving up and sighing like all the burdens in the world were his to bear. Katara smiled, clearly happy with this outcome, snuggling into him. “Cheater,” he complained, as he pulled the covers up around them. 

“Mhhmm,” was her only response as she felt lips ghosting her cheeks, and a body protectively curling around her.

 



Notes:

There was a lot going on in this chapter I think, I just hope that I was able to pull it off! Sorry that this is later than usual, I had a bit of a writer's block.
I feel that these two idiots would be too obvious, how much ever they try and though they took efforts to conceal their identities, someone must have identified them in Ember Island. It would then be natural for rumours to spread and the kids to hear of them. Izumi, never having met her mother, is excited at the prospect of having one. The other three are wary. God knows I would be, had I been in their place. But Zuko will prove himself to them, this time as a father and not just an Uncle, and they will come around.
I feel this fic would be incomplete without Painted Spirit shenanigans! I've been looking forward to writing them for ages!
The no medical supplies problem is one that is there in my country, unfortunately. I don't know what exactly happens to them midway, but I suppose they are hoarded and sold on the black market. It is awful, especially to healthcare workers who feel tremendously guilty for then asking patients to buy them from a pharmacist at a higher cost. I've thought that Katara in particular would be extremely affected by this problem, and it might be my only way of letting out my own frustration.
This fic has now crossed 550 kudos, and I'm so happy about it!! As always, thanks to you guys, who keep reading despite my erratic posting.

Chapter 18: Distance

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

When Katara awoke the next morning, Zuko had already left. All she had left of him were hazy memories of soft kisses in the faint blue of the early morning. He’d tried to kiss her awake, she remembered. And then, slightly embarrassed, she also remembered the way she’d nearly thrown him off the bed and mumbled threats of bodily harm. 

She got dressed and went about her day. She noticed additional guards accompanying the children to school and wasn’t surprised to see more milling about the hallways and office complex. Though it did irk her that there seemed to be a couple tailing her as well. Midway through, she heard a commotion from outside her room, located as it was in the office complex. It seemed that Minister Yoshida had been stripped of his title and lands and all power. In one fell swoop, the Firelord had seized everything. The lords had made a terrible scene, but when there was such irrefutable proof of wrongdoing, there was nothing anyone could say. The family would be banished within the day and the head of family would be interrogated and imprisoned. 

Katara slipped in the Firelord’s office towards the end of the day with a pot of tea. She found him with his head in his hands, surrounded by mountains of paperwork. “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes,” he nearly groaned. 

“I wish I could’ve been there with you through it all,” she said, walking around to stand behind him. 

“I wish you could’ve been there as well,” he grumbled as she took out the flame shaped headpiece from its place of honour. Then, shaking his hair loose, she ran her fingers through it, massaging his scalp softly. Zuko sighed, “You could’ve managed the situation a lot better than I did, honestly.” 

After a bit, she drew water out of her pouch and made a ring around his brow, healing his headache. 

“So now you’re fine with touching me?” he grumbled. “Earlier this morning it was all about cutting my …”

“Oh, hush,” Katara said, blushing. “And you should know better than to wake me up early.” Then, she poured some tea out for both of them, and Zuko slowly told her how awful his day had been. The tea was finished by the time he was done, and they began making their way to the training arena. Katara protested that Bumi would understand if he missed a day, but he just shook his head. 

“You’re tired, Zuko! You need to take care of yourself!” she exclaimed

He just hummed, and then suddenly grasping her wrist, pulled her into a secluded corner. Suddenly they were very close and Katara could feel every inch of his broad chest. He rumbled in a low tone, “How about you take care of me, then waterbender? After the day I’ve had, don’t you think I deserve it?”

Katara felt his breath wash over her, as she too leaned up, her fingers tracing his lips as she drawled, “Maaayybe…”

He leaned closer to her, as he questioned, “Just maybe?”

She murmured with anticipation, their lips almost touching, “Defini-”

“EWW!! EW EW EW EWEWEWEWEW!” 

Turning around, they noticed three people in the hallway near them: Bumi who was mimicking vomiting, Izumi who looked aghast and Ty Lee who was making heart eyes at both of them, looking like she was holding in a squeal with a lot of effort. And then it was just a bunch of explanations and apologies as they put some distance between each other. Even so, they all heard Bumi whisper sometime later, “Zumi, I think our parents are having S-E-X.”

“Sex? What does that mean?” she asked innocently. 

Katara butted in, “It’s an adult thing sweetheart, I’ll tell you when you’re as old as Bumi is.”

Later that evening, Katara found Zuko again. He smiled warmly at her, and she smiled back nervously. She hadn't had the opportunity to tell him during the day, but she’d have to now. “Zuko… do you remember discussing my Healthcare project?”

“Mhhmh,” he said, without looking up from his tea brewing.

“And how we’d discussed that we need to figure out the exact need for this sort of thing in different provinces. Where we’d place the waterbenders, where we’d build the bigger hospitals and such?”

He still wasn’t looking up, as he went about making the tea. He just nodded to show that he was listening. Uncle, who’d sat in silence so far, seemed to realise where this was headed and looked up with interest. 

“Well. It’s been decided that I’ll be going. With Tapeesa and Yue. We’ll be covering the Northern Islands, and then they’ll do the Southern ones by themselves, because the data isn’t as outdated and by then they’ll understand how to go about this-”

“Wait. What?” Zuko finally looked up, eyes alert. 

“I’ll be gone for a month or so,” she explained. Zuko was very quickly getting a panicked look in his eyes and Iroh excused himself from the room, complaining of ‘White Lotus Work’.

“Why do you need to go? Send someone else!” Zuko burst out.

“It’s only for a little while,” she said, moving towards him. He still looked sullen. Katara hmphed, then gathering her skirts, went and placed herself in his lap. “It’s only for a little while, I’ll be back before you know it.” 

"But-"

"This project needs to be perfect, Zuko. I can't leave anything up to chance."

"But that doesn't mean that you have to do everything by yourself! That's why you have a team of people!"

"And I will let them handle things once I'm sure that they can," Katara said firmly. "I'll be back in time for Kya's birthday."

Over the next few days, it felt like Zuko had been transformed into a teenager again with the way he went on brooding. When he wasn’t doing that, he was going over her security detail and every minute aspect of her journey. It had been adorable at first, but now she was annoyed. Finally, she’d burst at him over a dinner three nights later, about how overbearing and overprotective he was being. This earned her a snicker from Kya, as she said, “Now you know how it feels to be on the other side of it.”

The kids were honestly being more accommodating than he was. That’s not to say some tears weren’t shed. They were. Doubts were also voiced, but she placated them as well. They’d have Uncle Zuko and Gramp-Gramp here. It would be fine. She’d be back soon, bearing gifts. Still, it was difficult for her as well. She was fine with the travelling aspect of it, but she hadn’t been without all three of her kids for a very long time.

Zuko saw her off at the docks early in the morning. They were in the public eye, so he couldn’t do much other than offer some stiff words of farewell. It didn’t matter she decided, as his figure got smaller, their real goodbyes had been said the night prior. 

 After that, for a month, that ship would be their home. The women with her helped her waterbend the tides and they cut through the waters towards their destination, which was the last island at the tip of the Fire Nation archipelago. They could make out glaciers from here and she saw Yue get slightly teary, while Tapeesa just turned away resolutely. There weren’t too many people and those that were had to travel a couple of hours by boat for the nearest physician. Yet, there was a messenger hawk centre, with a hawk waiting for her. She read through the letters it carried all at once, quickly and then kept them aside to read later. For now, her work took priority and it looked like she had her job cut out for her. 

The people were wary of them, with most responses they received being curt. No one engaged and instead rushed away to peer at them from afar. While walking through the streets, Katara was hit by a projectile that spattered red all over her face. It turned out to be a tomato sent her way by a young boy. 

Her security looked outraged. The team leader asked angrily, “Lady Katara, do you want us to apprehend-” But Katara lifted a hand, stopping him then and there.

Looking around, she realised that most people were either avoiding meeting her eyes or actively glaring. She wasn’t surprised, but it hurt nevertheless. She wondered how many of their friends and family had died fighting in the war. Or drowned in the icy waters up North. Conscription in the army had been mandatory, Zuko had said. And they had been the enemy not too long ago. Meanwhile, her rumination was interrupted with a terrified scream from farther away. The tomato thrower had run away on a rooftop, but had consequently slipped and fallen. Katara rushed to the scene.

People had already begun crowding, voicing thoughts about taking him to the physician the next island over. As Katara pushed through, the crowd seemed to get increasingly aggravated. 

“Water witch-”

“What’s she doing?”

“Don’t touch him-”

“Gah! The water’s glowing!”

“What are you soldiers doing watching? She’s killing the boy!”

“The pain’s less!” At the boy’s exclamation, everyone fell silent. He tried to get up and walk away, but Katara smiled gently and pulled him down. 

“What’s your name?” she asked.

“Kuzon,” he replied shyly. 

“That’s a lovely name, Kuzon,” Katara smiled at him. “Mine’s Katara. We’ll get you fixed in no time.” She turned to the crowd and said, “Can someone direct us to Kuzon’s house? I will need to tell his mother how to care for him. And we’ll need someone to carry him as well.”

Katara took the time to clean her hair of tomato pulp as the crowd dissipated uneasily, while some others came with her. It looked like now more people were sending her curious glances instead of just outright glares. The house wasn’t far away, and the mother turned out to be another woman who just wouldn’t look her in the eyes. Over the course of the conversation, as she was told of the partially healed fracture, the woman looked at her in surprise and awe, though the wariness remained. 

As they returned to the town centre, they were accosted by another woman. “Please, please I… I’ve heard of you. They say you’re a miracle worker. Please please come with me, my sister needs help!”

Katara nodded at Yue and Tapeesa to go on ahead with their work, and went to see the patient herself. It was curable, she realised. It would just require the right combination of Water Tribe and Fire Nation healing. After an hour’s work, the patient’s fever went down and the woman - Hina-  delirious with happiness, invited them to stay the night as a gesture of thanks. The waterbender accepted, and met up with the rest of their group in the town centre. 

A count of the population was made, along with the facilities present and size of the island. The people of the island distrusted waterbenders, yet they desperately needed a physician on this island and a set of healers in a hospital setting for the nearby islands. 

As they neared the Hina’s house, they realised that quite a crowd had gathered. She and the guards tensed, expecting mob violence of some kind, but instead a girl came out, and clung to her hand, “My brother is really sick, please can you take a look at him?”

It turned out that news had spread and everyone gathered was a patient and the rest of the evening was spent in healing them as the hut was transformed into a small clinic. 

“I heard what happened in the marketplace, Lady Katara,” Hina said as she helped Katara out with a patient. “You must understand, we’ve lost a lot of good people over the years in the war. Now we get lovely pelts for the winter and jewellery of bone. Trade gets us more coin as well. But old fears are difficult to overcome. Kuzon has lost his brother in the battle up North.”

“I lost someone as well,” Katara said, as the all too familiar guilt and sadness crept in. “One of my closest friends. She was a brave soul. It is difficult to forgive and forget what happened. I can't expect that of you. All I need is a chance to show that we can grow beyond the war and hate in our past to create a better future.”

And at that moment, Katara knew what had to be done, though she didn’t like it. Later that night, she began writing the letters to her family and Zuko telling them that she’d have to prolong the tour.

It caused a pang in her heart, thinking of separating herself from her family for this long. The letters helped, and she read them over and over again. The first was from Zuko, inquiring into her health, asking whether she was overworking herself, telling her the latest about what was going on, about the new taxation scheme he was thinking up, of how well Bumi and Kya were doing at school, and how he missed her. 

She missed him too, terribly. She could imagine him speaking these words he’d written, could imagine herself sharing a tea with him and if she focused enough, she could imagine that the parchment smelt of him. Tapeesa walked in when she was thus sniffing the message and promptly stifled a chortle. 

Spirits, Katara. You’re such a sap.

The other one was sent jointly by Bumi, Kya and Izumi. Aang had picked up Tenzin nearly as soon as she’d left, staying a day at the Palace. He had apparently shown some interest in Bumi and Kya, and for that she was glad. Though the two still sounded resentful in their letter. Katara sighed, he should have stayed for Kya’s birthday at the very least. 

They left the island two days after they arrived and went to the neighbouring one. It was a similar story as she slowly won over the people’s trust. The next set of letters were already there.  

The conference is indefinitely postponed, Kuei says that he needs to take care of a group of mercenaries before anything of that sort can be hosted. So you can take your time… Tried to cheer up Bumi and Kya after Aang left. Don’t know if I was successful.

Though Zuko’s letter was lovely as usual, there was something off, something unhappy about it. Both Bumi and Kya had sent her letters about the recent parent teacher meeting at their school. She’d thought Iroh would go, but it turned out that Zuko had gone himself for both along with Izumi’s. 

He came and sat with me Mom! Bumi’s read . We had to wait there for ages, and then when he saw my grades he was so happy! He bought me my first real sword as a gift! And then I spent the day with him in his office. Next day he said we should… And then we talked about… And then he took me for a dragon ride….! He thinks I’m really smart and we’re thinking up things that I can do when I grow up! 

It just went on and on about his and Zuko’s exploits together, with a note on how Kya was doing and a hope that his mother was not overexerting herself. Kya’s wasn’t much different:

He makes sure I practice waterbending and spars with me! It’s so cool to have a firebending opponent, I even beat him once! I thought because you weren’t there and Dad’s… you know, that I had no one to come with for this parent teacher thing at school, but he came! You know I’m not the best at all these tests, right? I mean, I did fine, but it’s nowhere like Bumi or Izumi. But he was so proud of me. He thinks it’s okay if I’m not good at these tests, and there’s lots of other stuff which I’m really good at! Then he tried sewing with me!! He’s pretty good at it, he said he had to stitch his own clothes in exile did you know? And then we… And then he said…

She was glad that her children were well cared for, and even happier that they were regaining their trust in Zuko bit by bit. It seemed Zuko's tactic had worked. They didn't seem too upset about Aang. If they were, they didn't let on. Even so, she made sure to ask them in the response she sent. Bumi’s next one caught her off guard:

Today Zumi, Kya and I decided that it would be super cool and totally amazing if we were real life brothers and sisters. I mean it feels like that already, but just imagine!! We even figured out how to make it work! 

Yes, that would be quite pleasant, she caught herself thinking.

The days passed as they travelled from town to town. It was the same story everywhere and they’d sleep at the end of each day completely exhausted but satisfied. The news spread of the miracle workers, while those nearer the Caldera that knew already, welcomed them happily. 

Uncle Zuko and Gramp Gramp took us to the hot springs for my birthday today, Mom! It was so much fun!! Wish you’d been there… 

Kya’s message made her miss them all even more. At that point it had been over a month. Katara had planned on being back by then. She hoped that they had a good time, and felt terrible for pulling an Aang, and she missed them all so much. She couldn’t wait to get back to the bickering and toothy grins and warm hugs and sheer nonsense they’d get up to. Her children might be the most understanding and lovely in the world, she thought. She’d have to make it up to them somehow. 

What surprised her was how strongly she missed Zuko. She missed talking to him, she missed sparring with him, the way he just knew when she was upset, the way he knew how to calm her down, the way he’d smile, the way he’d make her blush, and oh when he held her… It was almost visceral and it was most definitely terrifying. It would get worse with the next island she’d be visiting, the last one on the itinerary. 

There was a gathering of people waiting for her at the docks of Sunrise Island. Katara stepped off the boat first, slightly confused, when a tall woman came forward. She wore the deepest red, and the most regal look on her face. Katara identified her immediately.

“Lady Ursa! It’s so good to see you again!” she said, bowing in the customary fashion.

“You too, my dear! Oh, you’re more beautiful than I remember!” Katara felt that this was high praise coming from Ursa, who in her opinion was definitely one of the most beautiful women she knew.

“You’re too kind. You really shouldn’t have come all the way.”

“It was no trouble at all. Won’t you introduce me to these ladies?” And so, introductions were made and stories exchanged as they made their way back to the grand manor Ursa lived in with her second husband Ikem and daughter Kiyi. There were well manicured gardens with ponds and tiny waterfalls and red tiled roofs all around. Ursa had promised a surprise waiting for them inside along with food and refreshments and Katara wondered what it could be. As they walked into the guest quarters, she swept her arms open, “Make yourself at home. You all must be so tired.”

Yue and Tapeesa’s eyes widened at the living arrangements and the prospect of a warm and comfortable bed after months away. 

“Oh, and Katara, this way.” Ursa said,  “I’ve set you up elsewhere.”

Surprised, Katara followed her to the section of the house meant for close family and was shown into a much larger room, equipped with a balcony. It had a mosaic pattern on the ceiling made of tiles, giving the effect of rippling water as the light hit it. She walked in, taking in the grandeur of the place, when a voice gasped from behind her, “Auntie K? You’re finally here?”

“Izumi!” Katara gasped, turning around. And then the child was bounding towards her and Katara was leaning down to hug her tightly, pulling her close to herself. “I missed you,” the girl sniffled.

“I missed you too, sweetheart. All of you,” Katara said, discreetly wiping a tear.

From behind them, she heard Ursa say, “Surprise! It has been Auntie K this and Auntie K that for too long. Izumi would have gone searching for you as well if you didn’t come sooner.” Katara didn’t understand what the ‘as well’ meant, and looked up to see the woman smiling pleasantly from the doorway. But behind her…

Behind her stood her son, tall and proud. Face closed off and emotionless to the outside world, jet black hair pulled back, beautiful golden eyes, soft lips… Once she’d seen him, everything else fell out of focus. There was only him and her and how long had it been since she was in his arms, since they’d laughed together since she’d felt those lips… 

She wanted to run to him, to leap in his arms, and kiss him in front of everyone: Ursa, Kiyi, the maids, and guards. She wanted to pull him into the room with her. She wanted… It was all she could do to just walk out calmly, Izumi’s hand in her own and bow her head in polite greeting. He bowed back, giving nothing away and the air buzzed with words unspoken. 

Kiyi said cheekily from next to them, “We’ll be having dinner soon, escort our guest won’t you, brother?” There was a smile in her voice, and Katara averted her gaze as she saw him nod from the periphery. It wouldn’t do to appear too eager, she thought. 

The relationship is relatively recent and he probably hasn’t been as affected as I have. He certainly doesn’t look like it. Safer to act aloof.

“This is so cool, Auntie K! Your room is right next to mine! I’m sorry the others aren’t here. Tenzin came back some days ago and then he just wanted to stay at the Palace and play with the turtleducks for a while, so Bumi and Kya stayed with him. But I wanted to visit Grandma and Aunt Kiyi! We didn’t know for sure when you’d turn up, but we were hoping you would…” Izumi kept a constant stream of conversation as Katara went inside to freshen up and change. There was a lot she had to tell her, about her grades, about what they had all been up to, about the recent school trips. Most of which Katara knew from the letters, but it was nice to hear just the same. Finally, the girl took a minute to catch her breath. The next words out of her mouth threw Katara off balance. “Dad missed you. Even though he’s not showing it now. It was plenty obvious.” 

 “I missed him too.” Probably more than he missed me...

At the end of the hour, she went out in the passageway and he was there, arm outstretched, all politeness. His eyes smouldered when she stepped out though, dressed in Kiyi’s pink robes and this pleased Katara greatly. The walk to the dining area wasn’t long, so she began talking right away.  

“How have you been?”

“Fine. And you?” he sounded guarded.

“I’ve been fine as well. I… I missed you,” she said softly, a little uncertainly.

She could feel his gaze on her as though he was about to say something. But just then, Kiyi found them. “There you are!! So, what are your plans now, Katara?” she asked.

“I plan to visit the Southern islands as well,” Katara replied. 

Zuko went stiff next to her. 

“I miss everyone at the Palace, I might stay there for a while before continuing, but I think it’s necessary to go on,” she continued.

“Why can’t you send someone else like you’d planned earlier?” Zuko asked suddenly. 

“Because I’m needed there, Zu- Your Majesty,” Katara said, confused at the gruffness in his voice.

“Well you’ll have to send the others, because we need you in the Caldera. The Four Nations Conference will take place there this year.”

“But I thought…” Katara said.

“Kuei definitively cancelled it from his end, and no one else can do it at such short notice. So I’d appreciate it if you came back to your position as Ambassador, Madam Ambassador. Unless you want to appoint a proxy.” 

“Alright then!” Katara said, definitely annoyed this time. Zuko was still using clipped words. It might have been just for show, but it also grated on her. 

They rounded a corner, and entered the dining room. “We thought we heard raised voices, what’s happening?” Ursa asked. Katara stiffly took her seat across from her and Zuko took the only empty one next to Katara. 

“Nothing, Mom. Just politics,” Zuko said in his clipped tone again, without looking at Katara.

“They’re having a lover’s spat,” Kiyi explained, which earned her two terrifying glares.

“That’s not-”

“We aren’t-”

Then both fell silent and ate quietly. Katara glanced over at Zuko periodically, but he never looked her way.  And she began doubting Izumi’s words more and more. 

“It’s wonderful, isn’t it, that you and Katara managed to meet up here, brother? It must’ve been ages since you last saw her!” Kiyi said, in a desperate attempt to defuse the tension.

“Just a happy coincidence,” Zuko answered. “It was high time I visited you, after all,” and for the first time that evening, Katara saw his face soften. It was illogical, that she knew, but there was a sudden pang in her heart. Why couldn’t he look at her like that? He used to. Had he truly not missed her like she had him? 

She excused herself early from dinner.

Katara fully planned on quietly wallowing in her misery, reading a few scrolls and just going to sleep, or trying to at least. At one point, she thought she saw two regal figures in red far away in the gardens. A little after this, just when she’d decided to turn in for the night, there was a knock at her door. She opened it, fully expecting a servant, or maybe an Izumi. Instead, it was Zuko, still in his regalia. 

“Why are you here?” she asked, almost accusatory.

“I…thought we should talk,” he said, shuffling his feet. Katara sighed. 

“Come in.”

“Balcony? It’s a beautiful night…” Zuko asked hesitantly from behind her, and she nodded her agreement. Katara went out and he followed, leaning against the railing next to her. There was silence for a while, as both waited for the other to start. Then Zuko took a deep breath and began without preamble.  

“Did you want a break? Was it all too much for you? Was I too much?” He sounded agitated, his eyes ablaze as they bore into her. It sounded like her answer could break him.

“What are you saying?” Katara asked, genuinely confused. 

“Is that why you’ve been away for so long? I went over your travel plans. I know for a fact that a quick survey of the Northern Islands takes no more than a month at most when you waterbend the transport. I get it. Mai thought I was a bit much at times, too. That’s why she took her breaks from me, or she’d burst. I mean I understand that I may not be the easiest person and there is baggage-” The last part was said matter of factly, but it clearly stung him. And then Katara understood. 

“You thought I was avoiding you?”

“Weren’t you?” he asked, in a tiny voice.

Katara shook her head. Then moving closer, she grasped his hand in hers. “The people still resent us foreigners. It may not be obvious, but you can tell especially in the farther away towns. I wanted to show them that we aren’t the monsters they think we are. It took more time than I thought it would, but it was necessary. If we are to station Water Tribe healers there, the people must be receptive and the atmosphere can’t be hostile. I needed to make sure of that.”

“Forgive me if I don’t believe that,” Zuko replied , looking away in the distance. “You could have delegated the work to  Yue or Tapeesa. Or you could have called for more help. There are certainly enough women that you’ve trained. You stayed away from your kids for months. You missed Kya’s birthday. I know you. You wouldn’t have done that unless there was a greater reason.”

Katara sighed. She really did not want to have this conversation, but it was unavoidable. 

“Fine, I did have more selfish motives.” she finally admitted out loud, looking away from him. “I do enjoy my work. I enjoy working for the people and I love this project. I don’t want it to fall through and for that, everything must be perfect. But … I also wanted to be seen working for the people and with them. I wanted them to love me , Katara, as one of their own. So that when the news eventually breaks that I’m in a relationship with their Firelord, they will accept me. They will accept … us. Which is why I insisted and why I will need to do a tour of the Southern Islands as well in the future.”

Zuko gasped sharply, lifting her chin to look him in the eyes. “That’s why you were away for so long?”

“I can’t speak for Mai, I didn’t know her well enough. But I don’t think avoiding you is the answer to anything. And I would never want to, I… I care for you too much, Zuko. And… if this is all moving too fast for you, if I’m overstepping-”

“It’s not. You’re not,” he interrupted, moving close to her and gently touching his forehead to hers. Finally, she could see that softness in his features that was meant only for those close to him and she breathed him in, wind whistling harshly all around. Yue shined down on them, as though pleased herself. 

“I missed you too, Tara. So much,” Zuko said, gently. 

She smiled, and finally, finally, could feel herself breathe again. They stayed like that for a while, content in the moment. Sometime later, she withdrew, pulling water out of a nearby vase to smack him upside the face with. 

“That’s what you get for being rude,” she answered at his shocked look.

“I deserved that,” he said ruefully. Then, “I’m sorry for that and for questioning you. You should do it. You shouldn’t have to justify your actions to anyone.”

Katara nodded. “I’m just glad that we cleared this up. And I’m sorry for not being honest with you earlier. I thought I was thinking too far ahead, in terms of us,” she admitted weakly. “I didn’t want to overwhelm you.”

Zuko chuckled at this. “That’s not possible. Also, in all honesty, I came to Sunrise Island just now because I figured that’s where you’d be. I had to meet Mom and Kiyi too, but I physically couldn’t stand another day without you,” He said, slightly embarrassed. This made Katara unreasonably happy and she moved forward to hug him. As the warmth enveloped her, it felt like coming home after months, and she clung to him desperately, burying her face in his neck.   

Then something struck her and she leaned back. “The Four Nation Conference…”

“Yeah, that’s still happening,” Zuko groaned. 

Katara mused, “But that means Sokka will be here, so will Toph, and also…” 

“The Avatar,” Zuko finished, gaze hardening. Katara’s grip reflexively tightened on their enjoined hands. 

The next day she tried stifling her yawns as she sat down for breakfast with the family. Everyone woke up extraordinarily early here and her situation wasn’t helped by the fact that she’d spent the better part of last night just talking to Zuko. Interspersed with a fair bit of kissing as they both got a little handsy. 

And then she was blushing all over again, train of thought gone completely askew.

“Katara! Katara?” She heard someone say, and came back to herself quickly. 

Ursa’s smile could only be called knowing. It freaked Katara out a little bit. “Why don’t you spend the day with me today, dear?” the older woman asked. What Katara actually wanted was to just sit in the gardens with Zuko, but she realised that there was no way to back out of this. So she pasted on a smile and agreed. Sending Yue and Tapeesa out, she went to Ursa’s chambers.

As the older woman ushered her in, she realised that the room was full of scrolls and tomes. It was one of the largest personal libraries she’d seen. “Oh, storybooks, all of them,” Ursa said, flippantly. “Sit dear, have some tea.”

“I’d like to borrow one or two if you don’t mind,” Katara asked, running her finger along the spine of a beautifully engraved volume. 

“But of course.”

Once they were both comfortable, Katara asked, “How have you been? It’s been years.”

“I live in a beautiful house paid for and managed by my son, married to the man of my dreams with three children, none of whom hate me anymore and visit me sporadically. I’m very happy,” Ursa answered.

“So then, Azula-?”

“Visits from time to time, yes. That’s always an interesting time of the year. Zuko and Izumi come too and we have a lot of fun. Zuko must’ve told you, there’s been a lot of progress with her since you were in the country last.”

Katara nodded. Though the last time she’d been in the Fire Nation was for Zuko’s wedding, remembering which put her in a sour mood. It must have shown on her face, because next Ursa asked, “And what about you, dear? One hears all kinds of stories. It’s so difficult to tell the truth from rumours.”

“Well, I did divorce Aang a little more than a year ago. I’m sure you heard about that,” Katara stated matter-of-factly, wondering when exactly this became a fact of life and less of a painful reminder of her past. In fact, she hadn’t even realised the anniversary of the day flew by a few days ago, as consumed as she’d been with the possibility of meeting Zuko and the kids again.

Ursa nodded. “Sometimes, it is necessary to go through some pain before we can grow. I’m glad that you found it in you to take the necessary steps. I was in an unhappy marriage too, for quite a long time. I can tell that you’re very brave for doing what you did.”

“Well it wasn’t all me. I had help at every stage. Sokka, Suki, Dad, Bumi, Kya, Tenzin and Zuko. Especially Zuko,” Katara said fondly.

Ursa was silent for a while. Then, “There is one other rumour that has reached us,” she said.

Katara, who’d been looking into her tea, raised her gaze immediately. Yet as she looked into those familiar golden eyes, she was hit with the realisation that she simply couldn’t lie. “Uhh…”

“That’s answer enough, my dear,” Ursa replied with a sad smile. Then she opened her mouth as though to ask something before promptly shutting it again. Finally she said, “I have a few questions, each more intrusive than the former. But the bottom line is the same. I worry about my son. Being a mother as well, perhaps you’d understand.” 

There was an edge to her words, but Katara couldn’t hold it against her. It just meant that she’d have to prove herself. “I understand. But I am serious about this. Zuko means a lot to me, and I won’t hurt him.”

Ursa nodded, but didn’t look too convinced. “Time will tell then. I like you Katara, and I am truly happy that you’re moving on and finding happiness, both you and Zuko. My boy’s been so alone, for so long now. You’d both be good for each other. But the implications of this match…” Ursa didn’t have to complete her sentence, but she understood. After that, the topic changed and conversation flowed till the time Katara had to leave and help the others, but the initial tension remained like a deadweight in her chest.

Kiyi insisted on accompanying her to work, though she too only seemed to want to question her and the relationship she had with her beloved brother. 

It turned out to be a long day for Katara. 

As soon as she returned to the manor, she went in search of her boyfriend, and found him by the cherry blossom grove. The flowering season was just beginning and fallen pink petals adorned his clothes as he fed the turtleducks. Walking up to him, she displaced two of the animals and deposited herself in his lap, hiding her face in his neck. Katara breathed him in as an arm came up from behind to support her. 

“Bad day?” he asked, and she hummed her response. She sat like that for a while, snuggling into him, before he turned his head to kiss her on the head lightly. They went to dinner soon after, an affair that was much less tense than the day prior. Ursa kept shooting her glances, and Kiyi loudly suggested that they go to their own rooms separately, but she persevered. 

Katara retired earlier, and she didn’t have to feign tiredness when she did. But instead of going to sleep, she chose to wait by the door for the right set of footsteps to pass by. Once she heard them, she pulled him in, through the door and into her room. Zuko appeared bewildered, but didn’t question the sudden onslaught of kisses. Gathering her to him, he kissed her back with a searing intensity and they crashed into the wall. 

“Katara, wait-” she thought she heard him say between gasps, but Katara didn’t want to wait. Instead, she entangled one hand in his hair, keeping his mouth on hers, as the other slipped down to his behind. 

This got her an instantaneous reaction, as Zuko lifted her up to place her on the bed, hands rubbing the sides of her breasts. She leaned away from him to discard her top, hoping he’d get the idea. When she looked back at him, Zuko’s eyes had gone very dark and his hands swept down to  clutch at the soft skin at her waist. She gasped at the skin on skin contact, and his hands swept upwards to her wraps. He pressed them, and Katara couldn’t take it anymore. She tried to pull him back to her, but he resisted. So she rose up to meet him, trying to undress him, but he resisted once again, letting out a deep breath as he loosened his hold on her.

And though he kept his hands on her, making slight circles with his thumb, he did nothing else. It was maddening.

“What are you doing?” she asked him, annoyed.

“What am I doing?” he asked innocently, albeit a little drowsily.

“You know what you’re doing.”  

He just smirked. “Is something the matter?” 

She let out a grunt of frustration. Then, he leaned in to place a single kiss on her cheek. “All keyed up with no outlet? The torture is real, isn’t it, waterbender? Welcome to my world. We’ll suffer together.”

“Zukoooo,” she pleaded, and he gave in by leaning in her ear. The words blew against the shell of her ear, riling her up even more.

“I can’t do it like this, not when you’re clearly in it to forget something. Not when we’ve waited so long. I want to make love to you right, waterbender.” Zuko breathed in her ear, and Katara’s breath hitched. “When we’re both ready, I want it to be something we’d both remember. Tomorrow, you’ll agree with me.”

 And then he let her go. She felt like she could burst. This stupid firebender and his stupid morals, she thought, as he walked away whistling, seemingly unaffected. 

“Don’t forget, it was your suggestion to take it slow!” Zuko called from behind her. And for a second she contemplated murder.



Notes:

There will be smut next time, I promise. For anyone who doesn't want to read it, don't look between the two *
I've always felt that Katara should go around, do something and win the people's love. She won't get it just by staying in the Caldera. My purpose was to slowly show her to be Queen material. And just to clarify, Zuko wasn't sure she'd be at his mother's place when he left to go there. It was an educated guess.
About the Mai thing, I really don't think she could deal with Zuko and his passionate outbursts very well. At least from what I remember from my last viewing of ATLA.
The parent teacher meet idea was @zutarawasrobbed 's. Suggested to me a long long time ago. Sorry it took me so long to implement it Ari! And the we'll suffer together part was inspired partly from this gorgeous webtoon I read recently called My Dear Cold Blooded King. Highly recommend!
There will be some Gaang shenanigans in the next few chapters, and Drama! Lastly, Zutara week is coming!! I won't be participating because I'm just really really busy these days. And so tired. But I'm looking forward to seeing all the stuff other people put up!
I don't think I say this often enough, but huge thanks to @myrsinemezzo for being my beta, correcting my plot holes and shit grammar. If there are still mistakes, know that they are mine, and happened because I edited something after she was done reading, something that's usually done very late at night.

Chapter 19: The Four Nation Conference Part One: Family

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Have the last of the invites been sent?” Katara asked from across the room, and Zuko just sunk further into the sofa he was reclining on. 

“You’re the host, Firelord Zuko. Show more enthusiasm!” Iroh chided from next to them, tea in hand and Zuko grumbled out a ‘meh’ from next to them. 

“Is there anything for me to do, General Iroh?” Katara asked. 

“If you can spare the time, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the seating arrangements.” 

Katara nodded quickly, eyes twinkling. Uncle smiled at her enthusiasm “We’ll get to it tomorrow then. For now, it looks like our Firelord has something on his mind. I’ll leave you to it. It’s late for me.” Draining the rest of his tea, he left.

Once the door was shut behind him, there was silence. Katara gathered the tea things as she waited for him to speak. Zuko finally mumbled from somewhere inside the sofa, “Sokka’s reply came today. He and Suki will be coming soon with Yue.”

Katara perked up at this. “That’s lovely!! I’m so excited! Everyone will be here! Should we tell Toph to get her daughters as well?” Then, upon realizing belatedly that Zuko was not, in fact looking happy, she asked, “What’s wrong?”

“Just tired,” he replied.

“Liar.”

Zuko sighed, getting up to head out to the window, “Some problems are only mine to bear, Katara. Let it be.”

“When have I ever let anything be, Zuko?” she asked, looming over him with mirth in her voice, and he snorted. But still, he wouldn’t say much. He got up to go to the window and she followed. Placing a hand on his arm she said, “Tell me, please.”

He still wouldn’t. It took some time, but he finally answered with a question of his own, staring out the window at the glowing lights of the city. “Will you go back home? To the South?”

Home.

She sighed. Leaning her head against his shoulder as she contemplated his words, she understood what was troubling him. It had been on her mind as well.  

“What is home, Zuko?”

He quirked an eyebrow at her. “I believe we may have had a similar conversation quite a few years ago, Tara.” 

“Yet I’m as confused as I was then.”

“Is it the place I left behind before going off with Aang? Is it with him in the skies? Or in those ruins he’s trying to repair? Is it the place I returned to? Where people called me horrible things for divorcing the Avatar and daring to try and write my own destiny? Where there are so many new things that I don’t understand, and neither do I want to. Where all my roles are replaceable, no one really needs me, and I contribute nothing of value? Yet, it is my home because it is where I’ve lived most of my life. It is where my father, brother and Suki are. Yet it is not.”

Katara felt his gaze upon her and turned to him. He didn’t look to be pitying her. He seemed to understand. “It took me some time as well,” he answered. “To figure out what home is. Sometimes I feel it keeps shifting. When we were chasing the Avatar, I thought it was my childhood home, with memories of Mom. Then, once I had everything I once sought, I realised that it was where Uncle was. Then he left again, leaving me with a blazing throne. I struggled for a bit, but then Izumi came into my life. She’s held my heart in those tiny hands since I first laid eyes on her. She’s anchored me to a home. For me, home is not a place. It’s a people. That may not be the case with you, but it usually is where your heart lies. And lately, I feel-” his eyes slid to hers. He shook his head and turned away, saying, “Nevermind.”

“Well, that made a lot of sense. Right until the point where you cut yourself off. Why’d you do that?” she asked outright.

“One of these days, Tara, I’ll tell you. I really will.”

“Just not today?”

He looked away from her. “Not today. Speaking of which, you haven’t told me what you plan on doing.” 

Katara knew what she had to do. They would have to discuss this - the implications her decision would have on their relationship - but she knew her answer.

“We both know that I will have to go South. I can’t delay it any longer. I am the Ambassador of the Southern Water Tribe after all. It makes sense to go now.”

Zuko nodded at this, as though expecting it. Katara put her arms around him, clinging to him like her life depended on it. He drew her in, and she felt cocooned in safety. But it didn’t last. This time, he was the first to let go. And his next question caught her off guard.

“Have you been happy here, Tara?”

“What?”

“Have you been happy here this past one year?” he asked. In that moment, he looked so scared and unsure of himself. It pained her. She raised a hand to place it on his scarred cheek and he closed his eyes, leaning into her palm. 

“Zuko… how could you even ask me that?” He opened his eyes in confusion, and she continued, “I have been given freedom and respect and a purpose. I have had the chance to enact so much change. My children are happy, they have friends here, and… as do I. I have you, and you mean so much to me… So, yes - I am happy. Happier than I can remember being in a long time. And though I miss Dad, Sokka, Suki and Yue, I don’t want to go back. Not yet. Not really. I’d expected to get restless much earlier. To be honest, I never intended to stay as long as I have. I’ve surprised myself.”

There was silence for a while, save for the rushing of the waves. 

“Then you should return once your work there is done, and stay here. For as long as you want to, because you’ll always be welcome,” Zuko told her with a faint smile. “And Tara?” he continued.

“Yeah?”

“I need you. Nothing about you is replaceable to me. And I doubt it is that way in the Tribe either.”

Katara felt her heart get bigger as she discreetly wiped a tear threatening to slip onto her cheek. How does he always know just what to say. Taking a moment to get a grip, she asked him in turn, “So what about you? Are you happy?”

With a sad smile, he answered, “I cannot remember being happier.”

“And that’s a bad thing because…?”

“It’s me we’re talking about, Tara. I’m fairly certain the spirits have decided against my happiness and that there’s some great sadness looming right around the corner.”

Katara crossed her arms in front of her. “Wrong. You are without doubt one of the best people I know. If there’s anyone who deserves a happily ever after, it’s you. And you’ll get it, I’m sure of it.”

“Thank you Katara.”

The next few days were incredibly busy. The change in location of the conference had been quite sudden and there was barely enough time to prepare. Every waking moment was spent going over the notes of what would be discussed in the offices or in getting the preparations of the week-long event right. But guests would start arriving a fortnight prior and would leave upto a week later. It was all hands on deck and Iroh urgently called in Ursa to help with everything. 

Soon, dignitaries began arriving. Katara had begun looking out of her bedroom window every morning since Sokka’s letter had arrived, and she was the one who first noticed the blue sails on the horizon. Hastily getting dressed, she woke up the kids. 

It was a flurry of activity with the guards scrambling to keep up as they all made their way to the docks. The ships had gotten much closer, and there at the head of the first one was a figure in blue furs waving so fast, Katara was sure his arm would fall off. But she waved back just as enthusiastically, a huge grin splitting her face.

Sokka got off the vessel as soon as he could, rushing to crush his sister in a hug. For once, Katara didn’t complain. She closed her eyes and hugged him back just as fiercely. She’d missed this. 

“Good to see you’re still alive,” he told her as he let go.

“Good to know that you haven’t burned the tribe down,” she retorted, looking back into familiar blue eyes.

But before Sokka could say anything, his attention was diverted by a very enthusiastic Bumi, and Katara looked beyond him to see a graceful figure in blues and greens climb down. Then she was turning around, and Katara felt another wave of sheer happiness crash onto her. 

“Suki!!!” she yelled, and the other woman beamed back, rushing over to hug her. 

“How have you been, sister?” Suki's muffled voice came over her shoulder. And then there were tears and soon Yue was joining in as well, chattering away to glory. They could have stayed there all day, but soon enough, Sokka was calling out, “Enough with the waterworks! We have a schedule to stick to! Come on!” He herded everyone- family and other delegates out of the docks where Zuko had arranged transport. Common folk looked on in curiosity and Sokka whispered in her ear, “Isn’t it odd to think that we invaded this land a few years ago.”

Remembering the distrustful looks that had been sent her way on her trip across the Islands, Katara replied, “Yes, it is.”

All the way to the Palace, Suki and Sokka told her stories about all that had gone down at the South Pole. They kept interrupting each other and completing each other's sentences and Katara felt like no time had passed. She also felt a lot of stares on her, and wondered what it was that her countrymen were so enthralled by. Was it her visible happiness, or the clothes she was wearing (which were blue, but in the Fire Nation style) or had rumours of her and Zuko already reached… No. She had enough on her hands the next few days, she could do without the paranoia.  She remembered everyone who had come, of course, and greeted them by name.

Zuko was waiting for them with a retinue at the Palace gates. Katara had been there when the entire area was being festooned with lamps, streamers and banners of the Four Nations, she had overseen the preparations herself, but it was a surreal experience walking through the streets as part of a procession to be welcomed. There was fanfare that Iroh had organised and an announcer calling out who they were. What she hadn’t counted on was there being crowds. And that they’d be chanting her name as loudly as they were. The stares of her countrymen turned surprised, Suki quirked an eyebrow, and Sokka looked proud. He put one arm around her shoulders and squeezed tightly. “There she is. My fourteen year old sister.” 

As tears pricked her eyes, it was all she could do to smile and wave.

Soon Zuko came into view with his very best Firelord expression. Sokka kept a similar expression on his face, till they stood eye to eye. The babble died down as the commoners looked on with interest at this interaction. Then, very seriously, Sokka said, “Firelord Grumpypants.”

There was a collective gasp from all around, as everyone waited for Zuko’s response. 

“Chieftain Idiot,” Zuko replied without showing any outward emotion. Sokka’s face split into a grin as he clapped him on the back. “Good to see you.”

“And you,” Zuko said smiling, and the tension defused. 

Then, turning around, he greeted Suki in the customary Earth Kingdom greeting. She was smiling as well, as they all made their way inside. Zuko and Sokka walking side by side up ahead. Katara tried to keep up with what was being said, but they weren’t speaking too loudly. The only thing she caught was a soft, “I cannot thank you enough for looking after her,” from Sokka, after which she stopped trying to listen in.

That day, they sat around the table as one big, happy family. The kids, who had been kept away from the public eye on the way back to the palace, were introduced to each other, and there was more noise around the table than ever before. That evening, Katara sat with her brother for a long, long time as they talked into the night. 

The next day, Uncle Sokka decided to spend the day with his niece and nephews. They took the day off from school to roam around town. When they got back, Sokka was most aggravated. “They don’t idolise me anymore. It’s all Uncle Zuko this and Uncle Zuko that,” he told Katara and Suki who were looking over some trade agreements in Katara’s room. “And then Bumi made us come back early. Where is he anyway?” Sokka grumpily asked them. 

“Probably swordbending with Zuko, do you want to watch?” Katara asked, looking up from her scroll. There was a beat of silence as Sokka slowly went red in the face. 

My nephew, MY blood, is swordbending with the jerkbender , without me ?! The outrage!” And he stormed out.

Katara sighed, “Come on Suki. He’s going in the wrong direction. I’ll take you both to the arena.”

Once there, Sokka strode towards Bumi, obviously trying to remain calm, “Why didn’t you invite me, young Bumi? I could have taught you today as well.”

“Oh right, Uncle Sokka! You swordbend as well!” Bumi beamed up happily, and Sokka seethed some more as Zuko muffled his laughter.

As well?! I am better than the jerkbender!” Sokka said, drawing his sword. “And you!” he said, pointing it at Zuko, “You turned him against me!”

“If it’s a fight you want, Sokka…” Zuko said, drawing his own swords.

“I don't think that's a good idea Uncle Sokka, Dadko is pretty good.”

They both spoke at the same time, but all of a sudden there was pin drop silence. Katara clapped her hands to her mouth. Had her son really called Zuko that? Did he really consider him his father, was it even possible...? She knew that after her month-long absence, Bumi, Kya and Zuko had only grown closer. Bumi and Kya followed him everywhere like little lost snow puppies and went out of their way to show him their achievements. Tenzin was still wary, but she could tell that he was trying. But neither had spoken of their mother’s relationship to Zuko so far. And for this, she was grateful. But now… 

“What did you say, Bumi?” Suki asked from next to her, the first to regain her composure. While the others just stood in stunned silence.

“It’s not his fault!! Bumi and I call Uncle Zuko Dadko, now because well, I messed up and almost called him Dad one day, Bumi and Zumi heard me and then I had to say Uncle Zuko and then I messed up and then it became a thing,” Kya said, all in one breath. She looked very anxious as she asked softly, “Do you want us to stop, Da- Uncle Zuko?”

Zuko still looked out of it. He took a moment to steady himself and then burst into one of the widest smiles she’d seen. “No, not at all!! In fact, I love it!” he replied, and Katara let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. Kya grinned toothily, and rushed to hug Zuko and Bumi followed. 

“You’re stuck with Dadko the rest of your life now!” Bumi squealed. Tenzin didn’t join in, but was smiling hesitantly from the sidelines. 

“Well I can’t beat that,” Sokka said, sheathing his sword, and Katara could feel Suki’s eyes on her. Turning to Izumi, she asked, “And what about you Izumi? Are you okay with sharing your dad?”

The girl nodded solemnly, “Kya and Bumi and Tenzin are my very best friends in the world. I am okay with being their sister. And if they get Dad, then that means I get you, Auntie K!” She finished happily.

“Yes, yes you do, sweetheart,” Katara said with a thick voice. She almost didn’t notice Suki pulling Sokka away as the rest of them relaxed in the gardens that evening. As a family, a voice in her head said.

Soon, other heads of state began arriving, which meant more socialising. Everyone had to be welcomed and side treaties and meetings began as well. Katara was kept busy all day working one alliance or another. The best part of it all was that she worked alongside Sokka. As a team, they were truly a force to be reckoned with. 

After a day full of meetings, she’d spend her evenings walking with Suki in the gardens. It was so much fun to just talk to another woman who understood her. Together, they judged every other person they saw and caught up on all that they’d missed. They’d usually end up sitting by the training arena, watching Sokka and Zuko spar. Bumi would be next to them, taking notes and giving them his undivided attention. Then, they’d take turns teaching him. 

Katara loved this time of the day. For the primary reason that Zuko always made a point of sparring with his upper tunic off. 

“Why does he do that?” Yue wondered from next to them one evening. “It isn’t even that warm, and I’m from the Pole.” 

“He’s a firebender, sweetheart. He runs warmer than us,” Katara said, her mouth dry. This wasn’t necessarily a lie, but she knew very well that it wasn’t the reason why he was always shirtless. She’d caught the smug look on his face more than a few times and she knew that he knew she was looking at him. An unfortunate side effect of increased activity in the Palace was that usually she didn’t have time to spend with Zuko. Nothing more than stolen glances and accidental hand brushes. So she would take what she could get. 

“Stop ogling Zuko,” Suki hissed at one point during the spar.

“I’m not,” Katara lied but knew that her face was aflame.

“You’re being really obvious about it, too! I mean the only reason I hadn’t noticed so far was because I was ogling Sokka!”

“Eww!!” Katara said. A turnoff if ever there was one, she thought, realising a bit too late that her brother was also shirtless. 

“Katara’s doing what?” Sokka called out. “Stop perving on my bro, Katara!! It’s gross!” And Katara was fairly certain that there was steam arising from her face. She was glad that no children were there to eavesdrop that day. Her eyes turned downward, and she did not catch Zuko’s expression.

Later, as she was walking back to her rooms to get changed after an eventful day, she felt a hand tug at her arm. In a moment, she was pulled into a closet with the door shut behind them. Two hands planted on either side of her head as she looked into dark eyes. 

“What are you doing?” she gasped out as he pulled her to himself, kissing along the line of her jaw. His breath ghosted her skin and she felt a shiver run down her spine. 

“Stealing you away,” he murmured against her neck, as he nipped lightly. Katara gasped, arching her neck for easier access.

“We musn’t…” she breathed.

**

 

 

 

 

 

 

He hummed, leaving open mouthed kisses in his wake. Her hands were in his hair, messing it up, holding him to her as he pulled her closer to him. His hands pressed into her waist as he lifted her up, and she folded her legs around him as he trapped her against a wall. 

“Were you ogling me today, waterbender?” he murmured against her ear as he bit and sucked at her earlobe. An involuntary groan escaped her. 

“Answer me,” he whispered insistently as he moved back to her lips, and she kissed him like she was drowning. Her tongue found its way into his mouth and he sighed. It was a messy kiss, but neither of them cared. Her hands slipped beneath all the regalia, and traced over his chest, lingering over the lightning scar. She moved and felt every inch: the very thing she’d wanted to do for so long now. He moaned against her mouth, and she could feel him stirring from beneath her. 

“Yes, I was,” she answered finally. “What are you going to do about it?”

He simply moved his mouth back to her neck, and pinned as she was to the wall, dragged his hands from her waist to her chest, pulling her closer. He raised his gaze to look her in the eyes. 

There was a question he was asking, and she nodded her answer. Peeling back her blue kimono, like someone who could barely contain himself, he buried himself in her. Katara had always liked her breasts, she thought that they were just on the right side of heavy and now, with Zuko mouthing at them wetly through the cloth bindings they felt like heaven. 

Next thing she knew, he was unwrapping the bindings neatly as he moved forward to feel her. Somewhere in her mind it unnerved her just how easily he’d taken them off, but the thought was lost in the whirlwind of feeling as he latched on to her nipple. Katara could not hold in the moan that resonated through the small space.

“Not so loud, waterbender,” he whispered. But then placed his mouth back on her. Still held back against a wall, Katara squirmed as she felt herself get increasingly wet. In response to the motion against his body, he pressed her even more tightly against the wall and moved on to her other neglected breast. She threaded her fingers through his hair to hold him to her tightly, and he bit lightly on the sensitive skin. 

She was halfway there, she realized, as she felt fingers on her outer thighs tighten and flex. 

“Zuko, please…” she begged. And heard a rumbling in response.

“Somewhere, under this very roof, I have a glorious bed…” 

“No… enough waiting…” she said, gathering the remnants of her train of thought.

“Who am I to refuse,” he said, letting go of her legs. She was confused for a moment before she felt his fingers part her garment and slide smoothly down her belly. She shivered, looking into his eyes, as he pulled away the bindings. It was dark in the closet, and in the absence of sight, every other sensation was heightened, as his fingers slipped over the smooth hairs to the bud concealed underneath. 

“Someday, when we’re not in a closet, I will taste every part of you, waterbender,” he swore, as he made wide circles around her, driving her slowly mad. Then, he went back to her breasts, biting lightly and laving at them as his fingers slowly honed in on the bud. Katara placed one hand in his hair, holding on to him tightly so he didn’t let go of her, and the other splayed on his back. She could feel her precipice coming fast.

Then, with no warning, he inserted a digit in as he flicked her clit with his thumb and she gasped. It slid in easily and as he pumped in and out, he added another, hooking them slightly, at just the right angle, and with the added stimulation to her bud, she was crashing down, head lolling down on Zuko’s shoulder as she tried her best to muffle her screams. She didn’t know how long it lasted, but when she came to, Zuko was carding his fingers through her hair and peppering her face with kisses. She was panting, still in a daze when he moved forward and whispered in her ear, “When we do this the next time, I want to see your face and hear everything.”

 

 

 

 

**

Then he was leaving before she could stop him, and she took her time righting herself before facing the world. Stifling a yawn, she stepped out of the closet, only to find the Palace in disarray. What now?

She rushed along, trying to find the cause, when she sensed something coming at her at full speed. With razor sharp reflexes, she turned around, using a whip of water to knock it away and freezing the assailant with the other hand. 

“Very nice, Sugarqueen. For a moment there, I was worried you’d lost your touch,” a voice said from inside the ice. Then, the ground was moving and the ice was breaking, a figure in green stepping nimbly out. 

“Toph!!” Katara exclaimed, melting the ice right back. 

“Long time no see,” the woman said. “I love what you’re wearing.”

“Why, thank you! It’s a mix of Water Tribe and Fire Nation… Toph!!”

“Hah! Never gets old!” she replied and Katara grunted. 

Then there were footsteps as Sokka, Suki and Zuko reached them, battle ready. They startled and stopped on noticing the scene before them.

“Relax! It’s only poor old me,” Toph said, yawning loudly.

“You decimated my garden! Again!” Zuko yelled.

“I only shook things up a little bit,” she shrugged. “Hey Snoozles, nice hairdo!”

“Why thanks Toph, no one appreciates these things- TOPH!!”

Suki chuckled, lowering her fans, and Katara was joining in as well, and soon, so were the rest. Katara and Suki converged on Toph, pulling in the men in a many armed hug. About five seconds later, the squirming began. “Enough, enough! I’m suffocating here!” Toph yelped, and they all reluctantly let go. Toph cleared her throat. 

“My girls will be at the Palace Gates by now, I hope you’ve made a place for them?” Toph asked, except her question was directed at Katara instead of Zuko. Predictably, Katara’s heart skipped a beat as she exchanged a quick look with Zuko. Toph smirked. 

Steel yourself. Nothing to be scared of. 

“Yes, of course! Iroh and I received your letter in the nick of time.” She replied with a smile. They’d have to be extra vigilant this week to avoid detection. How Toph had guessed already was beyond her. 

Then Sokka was pulling Zuko away for a ‘drink between bros’ and they all split up. Katara rushed back to her room, wearing that red nightsuit she’d bought in a fit of madness and saved up for an occasion like this one. She’d cleaned up and perfumed herself when there was a knocking at the door. Excitedly, she went to open it.

It was Toph and Suki. She tried to not let her disappointment show. 

“Hoping it would be someone else, Sugarqueen?” Toph asked with an evil grin as she pushed in, bottles of whiskey in either hand. Suki just looked at her wide eyed, holding pillows and bedding to herself. 

That night, they sat and drank. Katara tried to refuse, but Toph pressured her to go ahead. Soon, the first bottle was finished, and Katara was feeling tipsy, and Suki was giggling on the floor next to her.

“Lightweights,” Toph scoffed. Then turning to Katara, she asked, “Now tell us the truth. How are you, Katara?”

“I am amaaaazing!” Katara sang. “Leaving Aang was – hic- the best decision I’ve ever taken. The BEST. I’M SO HAPPY NOW!! I NEVER THOUGHT I’D BE SO HAPPY!!” 

“Okay, okay, don’t scream,” Toph said, but through blurry eyes, Katara noticed that Toph looked very happy as well.

“Yes, I am happy for you, you idiot. And yes, you said that out loud.”

“So am I,” Suki slurred. “He wasn’t right for you. We could all tell how unhappy you were. And now look at you! Look, just look! You sexy little thing!” Suki said, gazing fondly. Feeling awkward, Katara looked away.

“Yeah, Twinkletoes did screw up. Glad you finally set him straight. How are the kids doing?” Toph asked.

“They’re fine now. Took us all some time, but coming to the Fire Nation was a good idea.”

“So now that he’s out of the picture, tell us, Katara, who were you waiting for??” Suki asked, from next to her, rolling over onto her stomach. 

“No one….” Katara said, blushing bright red. 

“You are wearing perfume, your hair is all done, your skin looks smooth and you are in that sexy, sexy thing!” Suki exclaimed. “No sensible woman goes to bed like that alone!”

There was a sudden noise from outside their window. All three peered out, but there seemed to be nothing. Then Toph piped up, “What colour is the sexy, sexy thing, Suki?”

“Red…” Suki said, and suddenly, there was a much more distinctive crash from outside and Toph yowled with glee. Both Suki and Katara looked at her groggily, but Toph just shook her head. “Ah, there’s going to be so much drama, I can just feel it in the air! This conference is going to be one for the history books! By the way, Sugarqueen, on a completely unrelated note, how do you feel about Zuko?”

Katara felt her face flame up. Deny it, deny it, deny it.

“Which Zuko? The Firelord?” she asked, in the most high pitched voice she’d heard herself make. Toph rolled over laughing and Suki wolf whistled.

“Yes, that one, ‘ Tara’ . What do you think of him?” Suki persisted.

Katara began fiddling with her hair. “He’s alright I guess… Wait, that’s not fair. He’s better than alright. He’s really kind and cares so much for his people, he just burns himself up for them (heh). He’s an excellent Firelord. When I came here first, I thought he’d changed so much, his beautiful golden eyes were so serious, but then I realised that he’s still an awkward turtleduck on the inside. And he loves Izumi and all the kids so much, seriously he’s such a good father, he has so much love to give, you can see it shining in his eyes, they’re molten gold like the setting Sun. He still makes bad jokes and we have some arguments, but I can talk to him about anything and he’ll understand, you know? He also has the most beautiful body I’ve seen. I mean, those abs? Those biceps? To die for. I could just lick him up. And have I mentioned that he has the most piercingly beautiful eyes?”

Katara suddenly realised what she’d said. And she realised that there was now pin-drop silence. They could hear the cicada frogs from outside.  “Damn you, Toph! Why’d you get me drunk!”

“Yup, there’s going to be drama alright,” Suki affirmed. They went to sleep late, after much talking, spreadeagled over Katara’s bed. 

The next morning, the two older women were awakened by a knock at the door. With a dry mouth and pounding head, Katara answered. It was an attendant with a wrapped parcel and a jug of some vile smelling concoction. She placed both on the table, and Suki picked up the note next to the concoction. The only thing on it was ‘Hangover Cure’ in a neat and precise script. Katara’s eyes widened. She knew that handwriting. Without a second thought, she poured herself some of it and gulped it down. Suki followed suit, while Toph snored still. It took some time, but as her head cleared, Katara picked up the other parcel. It was small, yet wrapped perfectly in gold cloth. 

She slipped it open, and there lay a comb. It was cream coloured, with embedded pearls and a gold lining running along it. There was a single firelily along with it. Katara blushed. She knew who had given it to her. 

“You’re smiling like an idiot,” Suki informed her. Katara, who had completely forgotten her friend, looked up at her in surprise, but she was smiling as well. “Come on, we have to get you dressed. Your husband is going to get a heart attack today.” At her words, Katara nearly jumped. Suki just smiled coyly, “He’s gifted you something to wear. Surely, this counts as a marriage proposal?”

“It’s too early in the morning for this,” Katara complained.

Even so, she wore it in her hair, styled elaborately with multiple braids, firelily tucked behind one ear. Suki called Ty Lee over and they both did her makeup, giggling all the time. Toph scampered as soon as she saw what was happening, apparently completely unaffected by last night’s drink. As a result, when Katara stepped out, she felt quite nice about herself. She felt eyes on her, but ignored them all as she strode single mindedly to Zuko’s office where her first meeting of the day was.

Sokka was waiting for her, and he looked startled on seeing her, then immediately narrowed his eyes. Inside, Zuko was ready for them and upon looking up from his paperwork, froze. His eyes zoned in on Katara and he fumbled over his welcome greeting three times, a faint pink dusting his cheeks. Sokka cleared his throat loudly. 

It broke the spell, and Zuko welcomed them properly. Everyone took their seats and the meeting began. Sometime in, Katara felt like she was the only one speaking. Both men kept glancing at the hair ornament with vastly different expressions on their faces. Finally, her brother said resolutely, “Okay, stop. We have to address the elephant-rhino in the room. Who proposed to you, Katara?”

“WHAT?!” Zuko screeched out.

“Well, yeah! That comb is new and clearly expensive. Someone must have gifted it to her. And she’s worn it and dressed up too. It’s considered a symbol of an accepted marriage proposal back home,” he stated sagely.

Zuko shifted his gaze to her, clearly asking her ‘Did you know this’ with his eyes. She averted her gaze, as she went red. 

“Who was it, Katara?” Sokka asked, but she was spared having to answer, because just then, an attendant burst into the room with new reports and Zuko diverted the conversation.

This time it was the middle of the day, when she felt a large hand grip her wrist firmly and pull her into the nearest closet. “How the fuck am I supposed to keep my hands of you today, waterbender?” he growled, even as he drew her as close as possible. Katara kissed him back deeply, gasping out, “I waited for you yesterday…”

He whispered back, “I’m sorry, I was late, my-”

“SPARKY!! SUGARQUEEN!! WHERE AARRE YOUU??”

 Zuko hastily pulled back, and Katara let go as well. Why was it that they just couldn’t catch a break? Was fate punishing them for not going for it all those months, Katara thought. 

“Toph,” she said, and he nodded. Zuko righted himself, and Katara straightened his hair before he left. She took a moment to regain her composure and get her breathing under control, before she too walked out to face what would be at best a gentle ribbing, and at worst one of the most embarrassing events of her life.

Sure enough, Toph was standing outside, sightless eyes twinkling in mirth. But she didn’t tease them anymore, mouth set in a straight line, and in a moment they realised why.

“Come on you two. Appa’s been spotted.”

 

 

Notes:

Soooo... as usual, nervous about the smut, but pleased with it. There will be more in the coming chapters.
The conversation about home was something I penned when I was going through a bit of conflict in my life and maybe radiates a bit of honesty in Katara's questioning. That feeling persists somewhere for me, but I've made peace with it. For me, right now, home is what I make of it.
Zuko tries to tell Katara twice in these chapters that he loves her. Once before he breaks himself off. He really wanted to say "Home is where you are." and the second time was in the closet again, when he almost calls her, "My Love." That conversation will come soon as well.
It absolutely tickled me to write the Dadko, given that that's how most of the fandom refers to Zuko. Writing Sokka and the girls' sleepover was an absolute delight.
@ryu-slayer has made some gorgeous fan art for Chapter 15, and I will upload it here one way or the other. It's not fair, I thought I'd gotten the trick of it.

Chapter 20: The Conference Part Two- Most Suspicious Mosquito-Fly Bites.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Gusts of wind blew in the courtyard whipping away at the carefully manicured shrubs. People all over the Palace left what they were doing and converged on the giant furry animal that had dropped out of the sky. Then, as everyone watched,  a figure in orange leaped from over the bison’s back, flew high in the air and landed gracefully on the grass. There was thunderous applause from the audience and Katara felt her stomach turn. The man beamed at those assembled, rubbing the back of his head and Katara had the strong urge to rush back into the safety of her room. She had no desire to be part of this charade, but there was a firm pressure at her hand. 

“Be strong,” Suki whispered, and Katara had never been more grateful for her. Zuko had gone to the forefront of the ceremony to welcome their esteemed guest but she could see him glancing at her with worry in those beautiful eyes. She shook her head imperceptibly, trying to convey that she was fine, and he needn’t worry. He seemed to get the message, turning around and focusing his attention on the figure in front of him, he proclaimed loudly, “The Fire Nation is most grateful that you are staying with us, Avatar Aang. Thank you for honouring the Caldera with a visit.”

There was more applause as those assembled watched with bated breath. This interaction wasn’t just a greeting. It was a symbol of the peace and calm that marked their times. It was a reassurance to the people of the goodwill between two supposed former enemies. 

“Good to be here, Firelord Zuko,” was all Avatar Aang said in reply, rather distractedly, searching the assembled dignitaries as if looking for something. Katara could tell that everyone was waiting for more from Aang, but also realised that he wasn’t planning on elaborating. She wanted to hide. Bad enough that he had caused a small scandal, she really didn’t want him to notice her and create a-

“Katara! There you are! It’s good to see you again!” Aang was saying as he bounded over to her. She could see Zuko stiffen where he stood as onlookers stifled gasps, craning their heads to witness their interaction. The other dignitaries parted and suddenly her ex-husband was right in front of her, looking for all the world as though the last year or so hadn’t taken place at all. 

“Wow, you look gorgeous! Absolutely beautiful! I’m so glad you’re here as well, lots to discuss, sorry about last time, misunderstandings-”

Her view of him was suddenly blocked by a broad back wearing a blue kuspuk. Sokka had managed to force a smile on his face as he extended a hand in greeting. “You look absolutely beautiful as well, Aang, old buddy. What say we catch up over a drink or two? It’s been ages since you paid us a visit.”

The tension was palpable as both of them just stared at each other. 

“But I-”

“Did you know, we’ve spotted some elephant seals in Thunder Bay recently? They’re quite a sight for sore eyes and tasty might I add, if you cook them right…” Sokka said, pulling him away. 

“But Katara-”

“I’m doing well, Avatar,” she finally replied, in her most dignified, Ambassador Katara voice. “I hope you had a good journey? I look forward to seeing you at the conference.” Then nodding, she turned around and swept back to her office amid a sea of whispers. 

 

That day, it felt like eyes followed her everywhere. She kept a low profile and got through the day as best as she could. Aang joined them at the family table, choosing a seat between Bumi and Tenzin, regaling them with all his exploits of the last few months. Bumi looked how Katara felt: like he could be sick. She checked on him throughout and saw him getting angrier and angrier at his father. There were snippets of conversation she caught.

“I’m sure the swordbending is going great, Bumi. Tenzin’s airbending is an entirely different thing though, he is the second-to-last airbender after all…”

“Perhaps we’ll go on a small holiday somewhere huh, what do you say?”

“So did Mom spend a lot of time with Uncle Zuko on Ember Island?”

 Katara was exasperated. It was times like these when she questioned what she’d ever seen in Aang. Hadn’t ‘will be a good father to my children’ been part of her checklist for husband hunting when she was a girl? But then, she realised that she couldn’t have guessed that her prospective husband would turn out to be such a poor father. Katara was about to call her son over to her, but before she could, another voice rang out. “Bumi, can you come here for a moment?” Zuko asked. 

She caught her breath. Bumi hopped up to Zuko quite happily, and exchanged places with Toph who had been sitting next to him earlier. Toph thumped Aang soundly on the back as she took the empty spot, and Katara shot Zuko a thankful glance, but the rest of dinner passed peacefully.

She knew it was too good to last though, and sure enough, Aang came running up to her after dinner, calling her name as she started towards her room. “Katara, can you accompany me to the gardens, there’s something I wanted to ask of you.”

You could hear a pin drop. Everyone froze as she turned around to Aang. 

How to get out of this? How the fuck do I get out of this without making it awkward for everyone for the next week? Can’t freeze him a block of ice either, not unless I’m declaring war on everyone. 

 Kya had her head in her hands while Izumi seemed to be reassuring her. Zuko was turned away, but she could see that Sokka looked angry. The only one who looked hopeful was little Tenzin. She didn’t have much time to react before another voice erupted nearby, “Twinkletoes!! I have news of the Earth Kingdom bandits, come with me!” and Toph pulled him away without a second glance at Katara. There was a collective sigh of relief.

That night, Katara didn’t bother dressing up. She just sat there listlessly, until she heard a muffled thump in her balcony, followed by a swish of the curtain drapes. She wordlessly got up and held out her arms to the figure in black, who rushed into them as he cast his mask aside. He held her tightly, crushing her to him as if he could guard her against the world.

“Don’t let me go,” she pleaded, whispering in his neck. 

“Never,” he replied, picking her up and carrying her to the bed. She stayed in his arms, warm and secure. Resting her head on his chest, she listened to his slow breathing, letting it calm her down as she matched her breaths to his. Aang, the conference, the fights she’d have to pick with insufferable politicians, the whispers, the stares, everything quieted. She felt at peace, like she could stay here forever, tucked into his broad chest. 

After some time, Zuko broke the silence, “He wants you back. I heard him telling Toph.”

Katara went rigid. It may have been her imagination, but she could swear he held her tighter. “Well that’s too bad then. I’m perfectly comfortable right here.”

There was an appreciative rumble from Zuko’s chest as he tucked her head under his chin. Sighing loudly, he continued, “He said that his love was pure and selfless. That he gave up the Avatar state for you and-”

“Thus he deserves me?! Forgive me, but I have to laugh.”

Zuko was silent, but he kept playing with her hair, as she explained, “I never found the whole giving up the Avatar state thing very romantic. He would always bring it up to show people how our love was ‘meant to be’, but if he had conquered the Avatar state and let me go, wouldn’t we have been spared so much strife? He put my family and friends at risk on the Day of Black Sun and the only reason we seem to have won the last battle was luck. We were lucky there was a lion turtle close to Ember Island. We were lucky a rock managed to unlock the Avatar state. If that hadn’t happened…” Katara shuddered. Zuko had been badly wounded, he could have died if Ozai had come back and taken control of the Palace. Sokka, Suki, Aang and Toph would all have likely died. The Earth Kingdom would have been no more. 

Noticing her distress, Zuko said, “We’re fine now. We’re all okay. It’s all that matters,” as he gently nuzzled her neck, and she clung to him even tighter. Little did he know of all her nightmares where she failed to save him. Little did he know how strongly the moment he took lightning for her imprinted in her mind.

No. Nothing about Aang’s gesture was romantic, she thought as she traced the lines of Zuko’s shirt where his lightning scar would be. She wondered why she’d never voiced that out loud in all the years they’d been together. Now she could elaborate on why every time he told that story, she felt distinctly uncomfortable.  All of Aang’s ‘selfless love’ had weighed down on her and kept her the Avatar’s Girl. She was only glad that she’d broken free when she had. That somehow, through the haze, there were moments of clarity large enough for her to realise she needed to take a stand for herself.

Zuko lightly changed the conversation to the everyday tasks and responsibilities of running the empire, and she was glad. They talked well into the night, and she didn’t realise when it was that she fell asleep. By the time she awoke, sunlight was streaming through the windows and onto the covers she was snuggly tucked under. There was a beautiful firelily by her bedside and a letter inviting her to breakfast in the gardens. 



The conference began that day. Side deals had been done, treaties were made and now the heads of state and their ambassadors sat together to pull their world into the future. After the opening ceremony, the Avatar began the talks. There were a couple of discussions on the new technology being developed by the Earth Kingdom together with the Southern Water Tribe, when Panuk of the Northern Water Tribe stood up. 

“We would like to thank Fire Lord Zuko and Ambassador Katara for their continued efforts in bringing peace. Our deal with the Fire Nation has been most successful, and given us greater understanding of each other, and as such we have a new deal regarding international waters and criminal proceedings regarding pirates…

Katara sighed. She hadn’t expected the first battle to barrel towards her this early. Ambassador Panuk tried to soften the first hit with compliments, but finally got to his point after a long winded speech wherein she saw most of the assembled people stifle yawns. 

When the whole thing was done, he waited to loud  applause. Lots of it. Katara groaned internally. Meanwhile, Zuko was getting to his feet, “I appreciate that our proposal has sat well with you, Ambassador. The purpose was always the strengthening of ties between our lands. However, as we have told you before, we cannot agree fully with the new proposal you’ve placed before us. I have no complaints about the boundaries for international waters, but we cannot condone the execution of pirates.”

The ambassador from Chin spoke up, “They are criminals, your majesty. We have to agree with the North on this.”

“I propose that you return the criminals to the home country, where they will be imprisoned and dealt with accordingly. A yearly council will review all criminals and judgement will be decided,” Zuko said. Katara nodded. This was the plan they had come up with together, and Sokka and the Southern Water Tribe were completely on board.

“Seconded,” Sokka said from his seat on the Council. 

“Does the Fire Nation plan on sponsoring terrorists then? Who will pillage our boats and get away scot free?” another Earth Kingdom official asked snidely. 

“Does the Earth Kingdom plan on killing innocent fishermen who stray into international waters?” Katara asked, getting up from her seat. She knew that she had to keep her cool, but she couldn’t stand these people insulting Zuko and all that he had done for progress.

“Lady Katara, we respect you, but these are criminal proceedings and-”

“They must be dealt with compassionately?” she completed. “It is far more important to ensure the safety and security of the innocent than ensuring that the guilty are punished. And that those guilty get a punishment proportional to their crimes.”

“Do you understand that these are killers-?”

“Do tell us again, Ambassador. How many have you executed on the basis of piracy?” Zuko asked coolly. “It was a fairly large number, I believe.”

There was silence in the room. 

Then Katara began, “I propose a counter-”

“Will you let her speak for you, Firelord Zuko?” Panuk snarked. “Has the Fire Nation taken to hiding behind the skirts of-”

“Master Katara is intelligent, resourceful, and someone whose counsel I trust. I can rely on her judgement when making my decisions, because she is always thinking of the welfare of the people. And what she is suggesting is for the best, I believe. Do not forget that the most serious breaches into Fire Nation territory have been done by Earth Kingdom ships.”

They were at an impasse. Everyone looked around at the Avatar to find their way through this, but he was only staring; from Katara to Zuko and back. Gritting her teeth, Katara spoke, “Please hear out my proposal, lords and ladies of the council. After that we can vote.”

Aang eventually spoke up towards the end in favour of her proposal, and Katara won by a slight majority. When they adjourned for tea soon after, she stuck around Sokka, so she didn’t see anyone approach until a voice came from behind her shoulder. “Where were you and Zuko for the breakfast banquet?”

Rolling her eyes, she turned around, “We could have used your help on that one, Aang. It was the perfect opportunity for your speech on the value of human life.”

“Yeah!” Sokka said through a mouthful of food. “That one’s pretty great, why didn’t you use it?”

“Looks like I didn’t need to after all.” Aang replied quietly. Then, sighting something in the distance, he perked up. “Aaanndd.. looks like there are more than the usual hanging around Zuko,” he said snidely. Katara would have ignored him, but Sokka replied to that, “I don’t know why he doesn’t just give in. Dude needs to get laid. Apparently even that Kuwa is gone.”

At this, Katara’s head snapped up and she looked in the direction the other two were looking. Sure enough, there stood Zuko: surrounded by ladies from all around the world. Gorgeous, beautiful, intelligent ladies. They were fawning and falling all over him, and laughing too loudly at jokes she was sure weren’t even that funny. Actually, scratch that. Zuko’s jokes were funny. And to her chagrin, he was entertaining them! He wasn’t pushing them away! True, he also seemed distinctly uncomfortable, but why was he still talking to them? She felt the same wave of anger and frustration wash over her from a few months ago. The wave she now called jealousy. 

“He seems to be having a good time,” Aang said cheerfully, and her blood boiled. She quickly excused herself and spent the rest of the day glaring ice daggers at the favored Fire Lord. She was icy to him. Colder than the tundra where she’d been raised. She didn’t even stifle her laugh when she saw him trip over his robe. She hadn’t noticed it before, but since their guests began arriving, there were always women around him, and while he never seemed to encourage them, he wasn’t walking away either. 

“This happens every year,” Sokka said, finally noticing that her attention was elsewhere, and not on whatever he had been saying. “For some reason, this time there aren’t as many Fire Nation women clinging to him. Makes me wonder if he got a girlfriend after all… hmmm…”

“Does he… go out with them then?” Katara asked as offhandedly as she could.

“You mean does he sleep with them? I think he has in the past. I mean, can you blame him? He’s perpetually single and they’re throwing themselves at him. But he never goes out with them. No matter how much I try to convince him, none of my bro to bro pep talks work! And they’re pretty good, mind you. It makes me wonder if he really did love Mai after all…”

 

That evening at the banquet though she ought to be pleased that everything in the conference was going according to plan, and the delegates were having a good time, Katara couldn’t stop the turmoil in her heart. She was focusing on her food, pushing the broiled sea prunes around with her chopsticks, Suki by her side glaring holes into Zuko on her behalf, when said man approached, entourage in tow. 

“Ladies, I must take your leave now. There are a great many people I need to talk to,” he said to the assembled women, and she could detect a nervous undercurrent in his voice. 

“I don’t mind waiting, Firelord Zuko!”

“Nor I!”

“Nor I!”

Katara rolled her eyes for the zillionth time that day. 

“I’m sure I can’t take up any more of your time…” he tried again.

“You can take all the time you want!”

“That’s not all you can-”

“I believe he said he needs you all to leave .” Katara said, without even bothering to turn around and address them. She had rarely heard her voice sound as forceful as it did then, but it did the trick. There was a silence and the swishing of cloth as they all departed, no doubt to report back to nosy mothers or trade notes. “Thank you for that,” Zuko said, collapsing in a nearby chair. 

“Go to hell,” she replied loftily, getting up to leave. 

“What?! Tara, you can’t believe I-” he cut off,  seeming to notice Suki staring at him, an eyebrow raised. He promptly shut up as Katara walked away.

“Tara! Tara!!” he called desperately at her back, but she didn’t turn around. She continued on down the flame lit hall towards her room. It was a long way away, and she was only a few steps down the path to her chambers when she realised she couldn’t do this. She couldn’t be this petty, she couldn’t ignore Zuko; she had to give him the chance to explain. She was annoyed, but could grudgingly admit that she was also being irrational. He wasn’t Aang, he wouldn’t revel in the attention women gave him. She wanted Zuko to reassure her of this and hold her. She couldn’t let her feelings fester like last time. So she turned around and began walking back when she felt a tiny hand pulling at her robes. It was Tenzin rocking from foot to foot and looking around shiftily. “Mom, can you come with me? I need to show you something. It’s important.” 

“What is it, snowpup?” she asked, bending down. He just shook his head and pulled her away. “Someone wants to see you,” Tenzin explained. 

Figures, Zuko wants to see me as well , she thought. They moved towards the banquet hall and onwards till they reached the balcony of a ballroom she recognized too well. 

“Wait here,” he told her, vanishing again, but Katara’s mind was elsewhere. 

“Tara, Princess of the Southern Water Tribe, can I have the honour of the next dance?”

He’d been so shy then, all those years ago. But she could tell that he had been sincere, and Katara had wanted to dance with him. She’d been wishing for it all of that evening and if she was being completely honest with herself, long before then. Katara folded her arms around herself, wishing that he was here soon. She was cold and she needed her Zuko; to feel his arms holding her close, letting her sink into his warm embrace, so she could make things right.  

“Sorry to keep you waiting,” a voice spoke behind her, except it wasn’t the voice that she wanted to hear. Quite the opposite. 

“Aang!” she yelped, turning around, and sure enough, there he was, orange robes and broad smile. 

“You look beautiful, Katara. You always do. I’m sorry if I didn’t mention that earlier.”

“What do you want?” 

“I want you back.” 

“We are divorced, Aang. That means something-”

“We can undo that,” he said, moving towards her. She wanted to shrink away, but she stood firm. “You know that marriages are lifelong in the Tribes. I need you back and I know deep down that you must be feeling the same way. We’ll chalk it up to minor misunderstandings and-

“It wasn’t a minor misunderstanding ! We have serious issues, Aang! And I don’t feel the same way!!”

“Then we’ll work through those as well! Just imagine! You and me, travelling together again. A team, tackling everything together. You can spread your blended healthcare plan across the world, meet new people and we’ll have adventures! Just like before!”

“We’ve had this conversation before. I don’t think I can do that, Aang,” she said, turning away slightly.

“And why not?!” You wanted to get away from the Tribe, you wanted to see the world! That’s why you left the first time!” he said, gesticulating wildly, and moving even closer.

“I was fourteen then, Aang. And I did see the world, but now I want to settle down. I want a home. I am not a nomad, and I never will be!”

“The Air Tem-” 

“NO!” she nearly screamed.

Then he took one step towards her, and suddenly grabbed her hand. Katara froze like a deer-zebra in the lamplights. He was now unbearably close and she could smell the faint smell of Appa he carried with him as he said beseechingly, “But baby, you’re my forever-”

AVATAR!” 

The sconces were all flaring a meter high now, and the bright light etched anger and harshness in every line of Zuko’s face. His fists were curled and there was steam coming through his ears. But the most terrifying were his eyes. They were wild with barely suppressed fury. 

“Enough. She said no. Step away from her,” Zuko instructed in his Firelord voice and she wondered how much he’d heard. If he’d thought that she’d go back to Aang.

“This is a private moment, Firelord Zuko. Please leave,” Aang said, as the wind picked up near them. 

“No, it is not.” Katara said, sliding her hand out of his grip. “If you touch me without permission again, you will find yourself frozen at the bottom of the sea once again. We are not getting back together, not now, not ever. Please leave.”

“Why? Because you want to spend the night with him?” he sneered. 

“Avatar Aang, please understand that your words have implications,” Zuko said tightly.

“I always knew that you had a thing for my wife,” Aang spat at Zuko.

“Avatar, I am intervening as Katara’s friend, because that is what I am, first and foremost. She does not deserve to go through this all over again. Secondly, I do believe she is no longer your wife. It’s common knowledge.” 

“You are embarrassing yourself, Aang,” Katara said. “Please just leave.”

Aang’s eyes blazed then, as he said, “I’ll go then, but I haven't given up on us yet Katara. This love is eternal.”

Then he was gone and there was a very long silence as both Zuko and Katara stood there in the doorway. Then slowly, the sconces stopped flaring and returned to a reasonable height. She could hear deep breathing from behind her as Zuko focused to contain his anger. She turned around to see his eyes still closed, but they startled open when she cupped his cheek. 

“Zuko…” she began softly.

“Are you sure you don’t want to follow after him, Tara?” he asked harshly.

“How can you ask me that, even after all this time?” she asked him softly in return.

“You’re too good for me, Tara. Some days I can’t believe my own luck.”

“Believe me then. I’m not too good for you and I’m not going anywhere,” she said as she placed her forehead against his chest. He pulled his arms up and around her then, crushing her to him desperately and finally, she wasn’t cold anymore.

Snuggling into his warmth, she informed him after a while, “This doesn’t mean that we aren’t having a lengthy talk about those women.”

“You know that they don’t mean anything to me,” he told her. “You must know that.”

“I do, but it doesn’t help to see you talking to them.”

“I can’t be rude, Tara. They’re foreign dignitaries.”

“Then maybe I should start talking to some of the other dignitaries myself,” she said, looking up into his eyes. It took him some time to notice the mirth in hers as he tried to explain why he would be perfectly fine with that. 

She kissed him then, on his lips and for some time after that, there was no conversation. 

Later, as they made their way back, she asked him, “How did you find me?”

“I was searching for you when I spotted Tenzin. He was looking worried and guilty and everything in between. So I asked him about you and he told me. He’s a good kid, I wouldn’t blame him one bit.”

It turned out that Tenzin was waiting for them in the hallway, nearly in tears. Zuko rubbed his head as Katara bent down to hug him. When she looked up, Zuko was gone. 



 The next day passed as well as was to be expected. She tuned out the women flocking to Zuko and the glances her ex-husband kept shooting her way. Aang opposed Zuko on all the proposals he could, from innovations in technology to rice plantations. Katara, of course would rise to his defence along with quite a few council members, prompting the Avatar to  sulk in poorly concealed contempt. All in all, it was a miracle she survived the day sanity intact. The only thing that kept her going was Sokka’s presence and the possibility of meeting Zuko later. 

Thankfully, a  private lunch was scheduled for that day, made even better by  Suki introducing them to a brand new delicacy from Kyoshi Island called ice cream. Katara thought it was delicious. She was minding her own business, focusing on her treat, letting her eyes wander around the room when they involuntarily tracked across the table to Zuko. He was being messy. Much more so than usual and it was completely out of character. The way he went about eating it was almost obscene, or so she thought.

  Just my imagination, just my imagination. 

But he turned her way, white cream on his upper lip, and discretely winked at her as he licked it away. Katara nearly choked on her own spoonful. 

Next to her, Toph groaned. “Can you please keep it in your pants, Sugar Queen?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she hissed at her, her cheeks heated. 

“Sure you don’t.”

By tea time she couldn’t get the image out of her head. Nor could she wait for night. Lost in her own thoughts, she filtered out the chatter of the surrounding dignitaries. She wouldn’t have paid any attention at all to the hushed whispers and giggling had she not suddenly heard her own name. 

“Do you think Lady Katara-” one was saying.

“She doesn’t stand a chance,” another said.

“But there are rumours-”

“Please. With her past? He’s more sensible than that.”

“We’ll he did promise me the first dance at the ceremony!”

“I don’t know about that, Firelord Zuko fancies me. I can tell!” 

Katara didn’t want to hear anymore. She stalked back to Zuko’s office and commanded the guards to tell her where their master was. 

“I-inside,” one replied timidly. 

Katara nodded. “I have some important business here, don’t disturb us,” she commanded before letting herself in. 

He was there, pacing about the room. “Hm? Tara- mmhh!”

He didn’t get an opportunity to speak up as she strode across the room and claimed his lips. She slowly wound her fingers up her back and into his hair, pulling her towards him. He was quick on the uptake as he kissed her back, one hand slipping around her waist to hold her to him.

She pulled his lower lip, biting down on it gently, and he opened up to meet her tongue with his. She groaned into his mouth as the kiss deepened.  But it  wasn't enough, Katara decided, pushing him towards the nearest wall and crowding his space. He startled and dropped the scroll he was holding. Pulling back, he gasped out, “Tara-?”

“Shhh,” she said, moving her mouth to his neck, inhaling him in. She peppered light kisses up and down the pale column, before latching on to the juncture of his neck and shoulder. She could feel a hardness twitch at her thigh as he groaned loudly. She bit a little harder in response.

“You’re mine,” she affirmed into his neck, moving her mouth downward and pulling at his clothing. One hand slipped downward toward his crotch and she traced a finger along its length; he was already hard. 

“Is that so?” he asked, breathing turned ragged, and she slipped her hands down the front of his shirt to feel up his chest. Her fingers made circles around his nipples and he ground out a soft, ‘fuuuck…”

Her hands dipped lower, appreciating all the contours of his abdomen, till she reached the ties of his outer garment, which she made quick work of to fully appreciate his body. Her gaze settling on his navel and the thin line of dark hair trailing down below his trousers. She leaned down to leave sloppy, open mouthed kisses all the way down his torso and finally dipped her tongue in his navel, kneeling as she did.

“What in the name of all the Spirits are you doing to me, Tara?!” he asked breathlessly. 

She only leaned down, tracing the dark line of hair as she hitched her fingers into his trousers. “I don’t… I don’t really understand what’s happening here, but are you sure?” he managed to gasp out.

**

 

 

“I want to. Let me,” she told him, biting down on her lip. He remained fixated on her, hand slowly caressing her cheek as he nodded, and she slowly pulled his lower garment down, looking in his eyes for permission as she did so. It fell down to the floor and his dick rose up, brushing her cheek as it begged for attention.

 Smirking, she tugged on it experimentally, and he gasped. She looked up into eyes gone completely dark as she gripped him a few more times. He shut his eyes in ecstasy, and it was then that she licked up a stripe on the underside, causing Zuko to jolt from the wall.  

“Oh Agni have mercy…”

She licked up his cock again, slowing down at the tip to kiss the slit at the edge. Then, with wide eyes and painted lips, she took him in her mouth. Hollowing out her cheeks, she sucked, and Zuko let out a long and drawn out moan from above her. 

She took her time, savouring him, as she bobbed her up and down, working her way to finally swallow him whole, nose to his skin as he went wild above her, fists clenching and unclenching. She was enjoying herself and enjoying the sounds Zuko was making. 

She slipped two fingers down her front and knew before even reaching her wrappings  that she was soaked. She kept up the rhythm, touching her core at the same pace she swallowed him.

“Tara…fuck… are you touching yourself?” he managed to groan out. 

“Do you want me to keep going?” She asked, pulling his member out of her mouth with a loud pop.

“Yes! By Agni, yes. Please, please don’t stop.”

His hands made their way into her hair, as he angled her head up. “Good girl,” he purred  and she could have smiled, as she increased her speed. Now, with his hands in her hair, Zuko took the lead, gently coaxing her head back and forth. She lifted her eyes towards him, focusing on him, focusing on her red-lined mouth engulfing him whole.

 He shuddered as she twisted her tongue around him once more. “I’m… I’m not gonna last,” he managed to pant out. He tried to pull back from her, quite unsuccessfully, as she pulled forward, speeding up her fingers. 

Then she was seizing up, as she came with a muffled cry as she felt a jolt through her core and Zuko’s own release on her tongue. She swallowed all that he had to give her, and  only then did she let go. Zuko wasted no time in pulling her up, kissing her hard, and tasting himself on her. 

 

 

**

“That was fun,” she proclaimed, stepping back and slightly away from him. Zuko looked incapable of commenting and just seemed intent on catching his breath. 

“You have no idea… no idea,” he panted out. She quirked a brow. “I have fantasized about this so many times, and... fuck... in my office no less.” 

“Make it up to me,” she giggled, “Tonight.” And his eyes darkened. Then, leaning forward  again, she admired her handiwork. “Perfect,” she said, trailing a finger over a bruise over his throat.

“Aren’t you going to heal me?,” he asked her, grasping her fingers in place. 

“And why would I do that?” she replied.

“What if someone sees it?”

“Don’t let them.”

“But… but… that other time… So it’s fine if you give me these marks, but no one else?” he inquired, appearing quite confused.

She turned back, placing both hands around him as she leaned up. “Correct,” she whispered, softly kissing the mark once again. “See you around, Firelord!” she exclaimed merrily, exiting the room.



That night’s rendezvous was thwarted again, this time by her sorry excuse for a relative. Sokka decided on drinks with the whole group and then had a horrible bout of throwing up that killed any mood that could have been. 

Katara still had hopes the next day, however she was pulled out of the Palace midday to finalise the location and plans for the Southern Water Tribe Embassy building. On returning Zuko and Bumi were sparring in the training grounds, annoyance etched on their faces as Aang oversaw and passed comments. Bumi was careful to watch his language. No need to open that can of worms by calling Zuko Dadko in Aang’s presence. 

As Bumi’s lesson wrapped up, Sokka pulled out his space sword and went to take his place across the match field from Zuko. A favourite tradition with all their friends in attendance; . Zuko grinned and everyone else eagerly settled into the sidelines. . 

Both were well matched in skill and  insults, which made for an entertaining show. . Midway through, Zuko, apparently overheated and seeking better mobility, stripped  off his tunic and it took all Katara had to not ogle him too obviously. Unfortunately for her, she wasn’t the only one staring. “Uncle Zuko, you’re hurt!! There’s a nasty mark on your neck? How did you manage to get that one? It’s so weird.”

It was then that Katara fully noticed the large purpling patch she’d left behind. Sokka doubled over in laughter as Zuko looked very, very flustered. Aang was chuckling as well, his eyes darting to  her. 

“It’s umm a… mosquito-fly… mosquito-fly bite, Bumi! I may have had a reaction to it, haha,” Zuko tried to explain. 

“Well you should let Mom have a look at it. She always makes them all better,” Bumi informed him, hands on hips and looking every bit Katara’s son.

Zuko’s eyes met hers and she blushed bright red. Lowering her gaze, she walked up to him, her back to the others. On reaching him, she glanced up, softly biting her lip. 

“Be sure to replace that one,” he whispered to her and she blushed harder. 

It wasn’t difficult to heal the mark, and the spar quickly resumed, though now periodically interrupted by Sokka bursting into impromptu fits of laughter. 

Finally, Zuko called an end  with a, “That’s enough, Sokka,” and made his way out of the courtyard. Sokka just slung an arm over his back.

“Oh man, I knew it. You have a partner!! That’s amazing!! Kind of offended that you didn’t tell me about them earlier though…”

That evening Zuko was kept busy overseeing preparations for the end of conference dance the next day, but Katara received a set of beautiful golden earrings inlaid with black pearls. She sighed. They still hadn’t had a chance to properly talk. Zuko knew what this would signify to her and anyone paying attention tomorrow and had sent it across anyway, yet she couldn’t bring herself to send it back. She accepted the earrings and laid them out on her dresser next to the cream and gold hair comb. 

There were some difficult conversations coming up in their future, she thought, suddenly wistful for Ember Island when everything had seemed so simple.



Thank you to the brilliant @ryu-slayer on Tumblr for drawing this!! It's that moment on Ember Island when Katara finally confides in Zuko about her breakup with Aang. 

Notes:

Sorry for the delay! I'm working on another fic as well for an upcoming event- zutara dhamaka. My friend whisperingwinds
betaed this one and I'm ever so grateful. I can't thank all of you enough for all the kudos and comments. Truth be told, I had no idea what I was doing when I began this fic, but it has now developed into a hobby.

Chapter 21: The Conference Part Three: Dear Katara,

Notes:

I think there was a lot to be desired in my author's notes from last time, so here we go:
The balcony scene between Aang and Katara is meant to be a callback to the balcony scene outside Ember Island Players, where Aang kisses her without consent. It is also a callback to a previous scene in this fic where Zuko requests a dance and they're interrupted by Aang. This time, it's the other way around. Also, I wanted to show again, that neither of them is perfect but unlike her relationship with Aang, they're both working through their problems and communicating - or at least making an effort.
Aang is a little bit unreasonable, but that's what happens when you are allowed into adulthood with everyone around you worshipping the ground that you walk on and no one challenging you or your beliefs. Aang isn't allowed to make mistakes and grow, from what I've remember from the TV show and comics, but that's my interpretation.
The pirates bit is a kind of callback to the pirates scene in book one.
I loved your reactions on the nsfw scene, thank you so much!!
And now, without further ado, let's begin!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The day dawned bright and clear. Katara peered out her window at the cloudless blue sky before her. It was the last day of the conference with only a couple of agreements to wrap up followed by the closing ceremony and dance. Katara ‘s heart skipped a beat, and she smiled to herself at the thought. There were some things that had just not changed over the years; She still looked forward to being swept off her feet in the arms of a certain firebender. 

Throwing aside the covers, she took care to dress in what was becoming her usual blended attire of  Fire Nation accessories and water tribe blues. She didn’t really think about it much usually, but with the bill she’d be introducing that day, she couldn’t help but think about how integrated the two cultures had become for her. Her mind wandered to the people of the erstwhile Fire Nation colonies, for whom this was now a way of life.

The morning opened with Katara’s proposal of the Documentation Act, her brainchild, born out of reasons not entirely selfless. With her legislation, all four nations would have one uniform paperwork in place to validate birth, death, marriage, and divorce as well as a travel passport. 

“With our world becoming more cohesive, we can no longer afford to continue our individual ways. We need some similarities to ensure international cooperation and convenience,” she began. While she expected opposition from the traditionalists in all assembled groups in the room, it was likely to be mostly political posturing as  the matter had been discussed behind closed doors with the real stakeholders long ago.

“It’s all very fine for future generations, but what of those already married? What about everyone in this room who doesn’t have a birth certificate?” the Omashu official asked. 

“The birth certification will proceed side by side with the passports. And all who are currently married will have to register themselves as such,” she answered. At this there were nervous glances thrown her way and Aang looked like he’d eaten a whole lemon. Unless she officially chose to do so, this would make their marriage null and void. As predicted, there was more resistance, but it lacked any real conviction especially once Sokka backed her as did Toph and Zuko. Suki did not have an official seat on the council this year, but Katara was sure that she’d had some closed door conversations of her own with half the Earth Kingdom politicians. Or at least a well-timed exhibition at her dojo. The bill came down to a vote and was easily passed. 

With this as the last official meeting in the conference, they adjourned, though Katara still had diplomatic duties to attend. Next on her agenda was meeting with her Tribe – or at least those who’d made it to the Fire Nation as diplomats. She leisurely wandered through the gardens on the way to the Wave house. The Cherry Blossom was in full bloom. It was late this year, but beautiful all the same. Pink trees swayed above her with the breeze and she felt a petal brush her cheek. From afar she could hear the squawking of turtleducks. She paused for a moment, at peace with herself and her surroundings. For the umpteenth time that week, she tried to will the conference to end quickly so she could stroll through the gardens, revealing in the changing season, arm in arm with Zuko. So caught up in her daydreams, she almost didn’t catch the little projectile launching itself at her from the trees. Luckily her reflexes hadn’t slowed a bit and she turned to evade it in the nick of time. 

“You’re getting quite good with those,” she called out above her. “But now you’ve given away your location.” She moved towards the tree when suddenly there was ice freezing her in place as knives thin as needles came from behind her. Katara quickly made an ice shield, unfroze herself, and lashed out with tendrils of water in the same fluid movement. Two resounding groans could be heard from the rhododendron bushes as she pulled the girls out from their hiding places. “Caught you!” Katara giggled. But instead of dejection, there was manic glee in their eyes, and too late Katara realised her mistake. Her guard was lowered and suddenly she was glued to the ground once more, surrounded by four rock projectiles. But before they could hit her, she ducked and weaved out of the way to drag the third prankster out of the bushes. 

“Any more of you out there, girls?” she panted out. Lin scowled, but Izumi shook her head. “Well then, I must say, that was very impressive,” Katara said, unfreezing them. “You almost beat me! I’m sorry we can’t spar any longer, I need to rush to a meeting.”

 “Ooh, are you going to yell at a bunch of people? Can we come with you, Mom?” Kya asked gleefully. 

“It’s not yelling… it’s aggressive discussion tactics,” Katara explained, wringing her hands. 

“Excellent!! I want to see those!” Lin exclaimed. 

“Might be educational,” Izumi thought out loud. 

“Girls, you don’t want to be here for this. It’s just some ugly business that I have to sort out.”

“We’re definitely coming now, M-Auntie K,” Izumi said, as the three girls followed along behind her. Katara shrugged. Maybe there could be a thing or two they could learn. 

The lodgings of the Southern Water Tribe were some distance away on the other side of the garden beside a lily pond. It would have been a beautiful sight with the wrap-around veranda, but the whole place looked slightly unkempt and there were loud voices and crass words echoing from the entryway. 

She knocked on the door and the noise abated as it opened, and then stopped altogether when Kuruk's face appeared and announced her presence to the room. She stepped across the threshold, the three girls close behind. “Thank you for letting me in, Kuruk! Good morning, everyone. For those who do not know me, I’m Katara – Master Waterbender of the Southern Water Tribe, Honorary Physician in the Caldera City Hospital and Ambassador to the Southern Water Tribe. Kindly excuse the girls, they wanted to tag along today. You may know my daughter Kya of course, and these are her friends. I apologise for not having greeted you all properly before this. I was most busy,” she announced to the room. “I was also under the understanding that most of you did not want to speak to me. However, that is no longer a consideration as I have been made aware of a brawl that took place last night.”

Eyes widened throughout the room. “So you’re here to school us are you?” Kuruk growled from behind her. “Now that you’ve become all fancy living in this dollhouse with your silks and whatnots. Well we aren’t apologising!”

The rest of the men took up the cry.

“WON’T BE TOLD WHAT TO DO-”

“-By a damn woman that too-”

“-thinks she’s all that-”

“-just because some of these people have given her attention-”

“-and what are you thinking, bringing children in here?”

Katara felt rather than saw the girls shrink back at the sudden onslaught of vitriol. She wondered if they’d have the same reaction if they knew whose daughters they were. She sighed deeply, dropping her hands onto her hips. 

Time for aggressive discussion tactics

Lifting her chin up, she roared, “ENOUGH!!!”

The noise abruptly ceased. All eyes were on her now. “And do you think that the Southern Water Tribe will be invited to another of these conferences if you do not apologise?”

The uproar began picking up pace again, and she had to raise her voice once more. “By this I don’t mean that you should be the only ones apologising! They will want you to. Our lovely sister tribe to the North will want to paint us as the bad guys. But that is why I am here. The North instigated this fight, and I will be holding them accountable. And make no mistake, it is I who will be cleaning up after you all because it is my job. I just need you to look presentable when I’m doing it, and stick to a story . Because believe it or not, this is an international incident at a peace conference and you lot acting like sexist buffoon-sloths is not making my job easier!!”

There was pin-drop silence. Calming down slightly, Katara said, “Alright, tell me what happened, from the start.” The story came tumbling out in pieces. It turned out to be some schoolyard taunts. Stupid, prickly little things that would not have amounted to anything. Except that these were inebriated men, new to the conference scene. The South had started with jokes about the ‘the Northern cowards’ and their counterparts had retaliated with ‘barbaric idiots from the South.’ It had just devolved from there. At one point her name had come up as well. Katara raised a brow at this. 

Amaruq, Bato’s son looked down and shuffled his feet as he told her, “They taunted us, saying that it was shameful that we were doing the women’s work of sewing clothes, cooking and cleaning. And that we are as good as women because we… um hide behind one,” he said, slowly glancing up. 

“And I suppose this is what got you all worked up,” Katara sighed. The men nodded meekly, but she only gestured at them to continue with their story. The first blow had apparently been dealt by a drunk Northerner and then it had devolved into a full-fledged fistfight. Katara heard it all, arms crossed in front of her. If she played her cards right, she could wind up Panuk easily enough to win this one. She’d realised quickly upon meeting him long ago that arguing with him was just like arguing with a more inflated version of pre-teen Sokka. 

“Before we head there, I need to set you straight on two counts,” she said, getting up to leave and casting her eye over all of the assembled. “Some of you look angry at being told off by me, a woman, so I feel I should remind you again that while you are here, I am responsible for you in my capacity as Southern Water Tribe Ambassador to the Fire Nation. It falls to me to make sure our delegation is treated fairly in all incidents. Anyhow, the first count,” she said, raising a finger. “Needling other delegates, insulting them and instigating fights is wrong. It could get you and all of us banned from any future conferences. It is a good thing that our Northern counterparts are even more immature in this respect, but had it been, say Earth Kingdom dignitaries, their only response to your ‘teasing’ would have been to get us all barred.” 

The men looked adequately cowed, and she continued, “Secondly, I wish that being called women wouldn’t be such an insult to you all. The way I see it, if they don’t cook or clean themselves, they are paying through their nose for someone else to do it or they’re living in a pigsty. Both options sound disgusting to me, I don’t know about you. There is pride to be had in self-sufficiency. And as regards me, I can assure you that I have achieved more in less than one year as ambassador than Ambassador Panuk has in a lifetime. I am unsure if this is a matter of pride for you or me being a woman automatically negates all the work I’ve done for our Tribe and the world.”

Most of them looked uncomfortable, and wouldn’t meet her eyes, some were fidgeting. From behind her, Kuruk growled lowly, “Alright, you’ve made your point.” 

“What he means to say is, we get it. We’ll do better next time,” Amaruq said sheepishly. 

Katara nodded. Softening her voice, she said, “Okay, then. Now will you trust me? I’ll get us all through this.” Everyone nodded and followed her out.

Both parties met up in one of the meeting rooms Zuko had kindly lent them. Panuk immediately went on the offensive, demanding apologies and more for the way the Southern ‘barbarians’ had ‘manhandled’ his Northerners. And sure enough, the Northerners behind him looked much worse for wear than their Southern counterparts. “To think that this is a peace conference, when you lot keep fighting. Distasteful,” he spat out for added effect. “How are you going to make this up to us, Lady Katara ?” The last part was a leer. There was a different meaning behind his words and every man from the South stiffened at the sound of it. She could hear her daughter’s teeth grinding in irritation and indignation behind her. Sensing an impending outburst from her tribe, if not her daughter, she raised her hand in pause.

“What is distasteful, Ambassador Panuk is your utter lack of respect for peace, honesty and your sister tribe. Every account I have heard says that it was your man who beat up one of ours first. It was an error on both sides, and we are not solely to blame. Thus, both groups should apologise to each other, and I will not be making it up to you in any way, shape or form. Honestly, if anyone should be making reparations, it’s you. Words are one thing, Ambassador, but for it to come to fisticuffs? Now that is truly barbaric,” she said snidely. 

“Well, what else CAN a man do when he’s accused of cowardice? We need to prove our worth! It was a demonstration of power! It is unfortunate that those boys hiding behind you instigated it,” Panuk exclaimed, with all the posturing of a general leading his troops into battle. “But you won’t understand, Lady Katara. You are a woman after all. With nothing to your name other than being the Avatar’s ex-wife.”

“You will Respect Master Katara!” someone exclaimed from behind her, and once again, Katara had to raise her hand to halt her tribe in their tracks. 

“Of course,” she said calmly. “What would I know of war and bravery? I have only fought in one war at the age of fourteen after all. What qualifications do I have except that I am the youngest waterbending master ever, the only one in our history to master two schools of medicine, with more accomplished in my few months as an ambassador than most do in years,” she said with a slight smirk aimed at Panuk. The man went purple in the face, matching his clothes as he did. Behind him all twenty of the assembled Northern men glared at her.

She sighed. The gender norms in the Tribe were truly something. Katara thought to herself that it was no wonder that she’d fallen for a Fire Nation man when this was the alternative. The Southern Tribe was definitely better in this respect, but there was still a long way to go. Zuko, on the other hand, had always helped her with the cooking and cleaning, even when they were young. The screaming man before her brought her back to the present.

“NONE OF THAT MATTERS RIGHT NOW! WE DEMAND RETRIBUTION!!” 

Played right into my hands.

“Behind me, girls,” she instructed calmly. Then, to the men before her, “As you should. Let’s settle this once and for all.” Slipping off her bangles, with a slight clinking sound, she looked up to face Ambassador Panuk head on. “And as for the matter of cowardice and hiding behind skirts, if you’re so interested in proving yourself, you’re more than welcome to try against me. Any of you.” 

All the blood drained from the man’s face. She turned to look each of the assembled in the eyes, issuing a clear challenge. “Come on, get your revenge for last evening. You said my tribesmen are no better than women. Like it’s an insult. So let’s see how dangerous a woman in a skirt really is.”

After a good five minutes of silence, she cleared her throat. “Well then, that settles it. We shall not talk of this incident any longer. Perhaps you could teach your men some decorum, Ambassador? Maybe a lesson or two on how to handle their drink? I am getting late for lunch now, good day to you all.”

And with that, she slipped her bangles back on, turned around and strode to the door at the other end of the room, her skirts parting the sea of men easily. Though she kept her focus straight ahead, from the corner of her eyes, she could see grudging respect and admiration on the mens’ faces. 

 

The girls began gushing as soon as they were out of earshot and dissecting her tactics on the way to lunch. They all looked a little star-struck and she allowed herself a sliver of pride. If these girls could learn to handle themselves well in the face of idiocy and outdated values such as she’d just faced and in turn teach others, then their world’s future was in good hands. They arrived at the private dining hall in time for her to snag the empty seat beside Zuko. Conversation picked up as everyone made their way in. Lin, Suyin and Yue had gone to school with the rest of the kids the previous week and apparently there was a lot to discuss. Katara most definitely heard ‘Cave Dance Party’ thrown around multiple times. Then the servants began serving rice and Zuko raised his brow at her through the commotion, his hand slipping to caress her knee, How did it go?

Better than expected, she winked at him, placing her hand atop his and intertwining their fingers. 

Good, he smirked, his thumb making circles on her skin.

“It feels like Uncle Zuko and Aunt Katara aren’t listening to me at all! I beat everyone else in the races!! Isn’t that cool? They’re having a conversation of their own,” young Lin complained loudly from across the table. 

“Well yeah, what do you expect, they keep staring at each other,” Yue piped up and Toph had to take a moment as a loud, hacking cough overtook her. 

“Oh, ignore them,” Kya laughed nervously, obviously trying to cover up the ‘secret’ that half the table knew already. “Mom and Dadko are like that sometimes. They just have a wordless language of their own and none of us can really figure it out.”

Bad timing, little star , Katara thought to herself as the pot finally boiled over.

DAD- KO?!!” Aang yelled from his end of the table. 

“This is not going to be good,” Suki muttered. Zuko gave Katara’s hand a little squeeze before letting go.

“DAD- KO ?!!” Aang repeated, even louder.

“Chill Dad, it’s a combination of Dad and Uncle Zuko,” Bumi said as nonchalantly as he could. 

“Do you guys think of Uncle Zuko as a father figure?” Lin asked out loud.

“Well if anything, I consider him a bother figure, because he keeps bothering me about my swordbending,” Bumi tried, wringing his hands.

DAD-KO?!!

“I think I’m going to go deaf. It’s not going to go away if you keep repeating it, Aang,” Sokka ground out from next to him. 

“Give your Dadko some respect, Bumi!” Seven year old Suyin exclaimed from her seat.

“What… why?? You too, Bumi?” Aang asked, looking completely lost for once. Like the boy they’d rescued from the iceberg and Katara felt bad for a moment. But only a moment.

“It’s shorter than Uncle Zuko,” Bumi replied nervously, playing with his hair as his mother was wont to do when she got anxious. Then, darting a quick glance at Zuko, who just smiled sheepishly at him, he mustered all the courage he had and said, “And it’s because he’s been there more times for both me and Kya in this one year than you have in the last thirteen.” Everyone stilled, even as Bumi continued. “He plays with us, spars with us, hears us out, scolds us, advises us, teaches us, makes us feel good about ourselves. The other day Kya was feeling bad about her grades and the only one who could make her feel better was him. He doesn’t have to do any of this, but he still does it.”

“I- I do that too… remember that time we went to the lake region in near Gaoling…”

“That was years ago, Dad. Even then, you mostly only spent time with Tenzin,” Kya replied, sniffling. 

Bumi carried on bravely for both of them, “Kya’s gotten really good at healing, did you know? Like almost Mom-level good. I am going to go to Piandao to learn swordfighting next year when I turn fourteen. That’s sooner than Uncle Sokka! But you wouldn’t know that would you.”

“It’s just that I’m a bit busy with the Avatar stuff, and I have to train Tenzin…” Aang tried again, unable to keep up with this onslaught.

But Bumi only shook his head. “We tried to have this with you, we tried so hard, but all you ever see is Tenzin and airbending. Did you think just because we’re… we’re kids we wouldn’t see through all your flimsy excuses? Because we do.”

“Now, you know they aren’t excuses!! And I’m trying as well!! What do you expect from me-?” Aang finally exclaimed, gesticulating as he did, and rice from his chopsticks flew everywhere.

“You also made Mom cry,” Kya interjected, sniffling. “She tried to hide it, but we all knew. I know that you’re disappointed in me because I can’t bend air and I’m not even very good with water, and I understand that, but I can’t be okay with someone making Mom upset, even if it’s you, Dad.” As she felt eyes on her, Katara just sat there stunned, unable to do or say anything, a lump in her throat. Zuko’s hand had reappeared in hers beneath the table, anchoring her. She hadn’t realised that she’d been seen crying, and now there was more moisture gathering at the corners of her eyes. She felt pressure on her hand and managed to squeeze back, though she felt his eyes on her, worried. 

There was silence in the room. Complete and utter silence. The kind that you could feel in your very bones and wished for it to stop, yet didn’t know what you’d do if it did. 

“I am your father,” Aang said shakily. “We are family. Sometimes parents have disagreements. Perhaps especially because I am also the Avatar and the last Air-”

“Please don’t, Dad,” and this time it was Tenzin’s tiny voice. 

Aang stood up suddenly in a clatter of cutlery. Everyone in the room stiffened and shifted in their seats. His eyes, before he shut them were stormy, even as the wind whipped around them all. 

“Twinkletoes, don’t you dare,” Toph called out, but he just turned away and flew out the window, away from his friends, his family, and his children. Away from any chance of reconciliation, anytime soon.

Kya began crying in earnest, and Izumi and Yue moved to comfort her. Zuko made a move towards Bumi, but Sokka motioned him back down, making his way towards his nephew who seemed to be holding it together with difficulty. Lunch forgotten, Sokka walked away with Bumi, informing the help that they’d need grilled meat for later. Suki and Toph herded the girls away, all except Lin, who stuck to Tenzin as he wordlessly got up and left. Katara saw Toph indicating to her daughter to keep an eye on him and Lin nodded. 

Katara dropped her head to Zuko’s shoulder as he draped an arm around her uncaring who was still in the room. They sat like that for a while, until, ignoring his protests, Katara mustered the will to drag herself to her room for a nap. She awoke to find all three of her kids sprawled on her bed, fast asleep next to her. She lay back down, savouring this moment of peace after the battleground that the entire day had been. But noticing the slanting rays of the Sun, she realised that she must have slept for quite some time. She stirred, slowly waking them. As each yawned at her, bleary eyed, she told them firmly, “Mom loves you. Mom is here for you. I’ll protect you. You don’t have to worry about anything,” and even as she made her pledge, she knew it to be true. They had a team cuddle, before Kya inadvertently punched Bumi, who retaliated, and Katara slipped out of the ruckus, laughing. 

They were healing. They’d be fine. And so would she.

She supposed she had Zuko to thank for that. He had been instrumental in making them all comfortable, by being there for all of them in turn. She’d been coming to the realisation in the last few days that her feelings towards him had intensified drastically in the past year, and before she could even notice, the thought of separating from him post-conference made her chest hurt. Or perhaps these were old feelings, lying dormant deep in her heart and had awakened recently. Either way, her kids already considered Zuko their father, she thought, as she made her way through the halls to find him. If ever the universe was giving her a sign, it had to be now. And all of a sudden, the Fortuneteller popped into her mind.

Tall, powerful bender… 

She snapped herself out of it. There was no telling if Zuko even felt as strongly as she did. But that’s why I have to talk to him. I won’t know unless I ask. It terrified her, to think that she was risking their relationship, worse their friendship for this one truth, but she couldn’t ignore it any longer. She had to know. Resolve made, she tried searching for him with renewed vigor. There wasn’t much time before the dance, so she looked first in the large hall. Then his office, and nearby gardens. Finally, up to his quarters. The guards let her in, no questions asked. But here too, there was no sign of him. She wandered about the antechamber: clean, neat, and orderly as usual. Also, very red and very gold. She hadn’t stepped in here since the incident with… that woman. Casting her eyes to his bedroom door, she was suddenly overwhelmed by curiosity. She wanted to know what his bed looked like, what color his sheets were. She wanted him to find her there, maybe in a compromising position… 

Unable to stop the smirk on her face, she marched towards the double doors and swung them open. This room, like the one before, was neat and orderly. It felt more than anything, like a soldier’s sparse quarters, and she remembered Zuko’s three years as the Captain of a ship. The only thing that seemed out of place was a small navy blue chest laid open on the desk. It seemed to hold letters which he must have been in the process of reading when he’d been called away. There was one still unfurled on his study table.

She wouldn’t have snooped. Shouldn’t have snooped. But how could she not, when there was her name on the top of the letter? It began,

Dear Katara,

I wish I could protect you from it all. I wish I could kiss away the pain, the hurt I see on your face every time you talk to him. He touched you that evening. Without consent. I have never seen you freeze, my love, and you looked so scared in that moment. 

I have never felt rage such as what I felt then. The feeling that I could smite him off the face of this Earth, burn him to crisp, and destroy everything that he stood for. Like I could start a war for you in that moment. Or stop one, like Oma and Shu. Perhaps that is what they mean then, when they say in their ignorance that anger is the best fuel for firebending. 

Kya said that they’ve seen you cry. And I don’t know what to do with this heaviness in my chest. To feel so angry, yet so helpless at the same time. I want to make him pay. I want to make it better for you. But I know not how.

I only know that if you have me, I promise to love you, to treasure you-”

And here it had been cut off. It looked like he’d had to leave this one unfinished. 

Love???? He loves… me?

Astounded, she couldn’t stop herself from digging through the chest. There was letter after letter there, some dating back years. In some, she found instead of prose, poetry.

Dear Katara,

Bumi and Kya called me Dadko today. I felt such warmth in my chest. Am I allowed to tell you that I see them as my own? I don’t want to panic you, but I have seen them as such for a very long time. Even young Tenzin who may never accept me. I have my little family around me, and I don’t know what I did to deserve such happiness. 

Dear Katara,

I don’t know how much time I have left with you. I don’t know how long you’ll stay with me, my love. Will you go back with Sokka? Will you go back with Aang? Will you ever return to me? Will you ever be mine, truly?

Dear Katara,

If you had told me at the awful age of 15 that I’d fall in love with my best friend, I’d have laughed. But now, that fantasy is reality. I look forward to spending time with you. You, the person who knows me better than I know myself. You understand every glance, every frown. Sometimes, I wonder if we’d known each other in a previous life. Do you think we were friends? Or maybe enemies? Or lovers? When I dwell on such things, I remember green crystals and caves. Maybe one day I’ll take you to a play of Oma and Shu. 

Dear Katara,

There is so much that I have to say,

Yet one question remains.

That which I have spoken every night in my dreams,

A million times,

Should it be voiced?

Dear Katara,

Maybe I will never get to voice how much I love you. You’ve just gotten out of a long commitment after all, you need space and time, not more proclamations of love. I shall be a friend then, a boyfriend maybe, or just a listening ear. Whatever you want, whatever you need. 

But some days I can’t resist. Somedays this… this feeling fills me up to the brim that I think it might just trickle out at the most inconvenient of times, like say, our dinner table. And there it will sit, my confession, like an unwanted guest awkwardly taking up too much space. 

So this is how I will express myself. This is how I will scream and rave about how much I love you. Through unsent letters. And maybe, maybe they will reach you. Somehow. Don’t fault me, love, I’m only being careful. I’ve just found you after all, I can’t bear to lose you again. It might just kill me.

Dear Katara,

Today you learned that Aang would be coming here for the conference. I could see your face cloud over. Tell me, love, do you weep even now? Tell me, do you mourn your broken marriage? Tell me, do you miss him? I may never measure up, my love, mortal as I am. I am no deity, no hero in shining armour. 

Sometimes I delude myself into thinking that you don’t mind. That you will take me as I am. I promise to give you all I can offer, is that enough? 

One by one, she opened all of them, addressed as they were to her. Her breath had begun coming in great gasps now. This seemed to be the truth then. Hidden in a drawer in his room.The truth she’d been seeking a long time. She couldn’t stop her hands from trembling as she manically opened the others.

There seemed to be quite a few letters from around the time she went on her tour of the Northern Islands.

Dear Katara,

You’ve gone. You’ve gone because duty called and now I don’t know what to do with myself. I didn’t realise that you’d grow tired. That you’d grow tired of me this early. Perhaps I should have expected this, fool that I am.

Dear Katara,

Even though you aren’t here,

I feel your presence.

With you my day begins,

With you it ends.

With you,

Only you.

Dear Katara,

You kissed me today. You kissed me. You kissed me. I may never get over this. I want to stay here with you in your arms. I want to stay here forever. In this paradise, with the sun and moon and the stars and the sky and nothing else. I could die a happy man.

… 

And then, there were some before that. The next one made her smile through the quickly forming moisture in her eyes.

...

Dear Katara,

You were magnificent in court today.  Is it okay to tell you that seeing you in action, taking charge and leading is a sight to behold. I had a hard time concentrating on anything else. Which reminds me: why do you have to be so incredibly sexy? Sometimes I feel lightheaded just watching you waterbend because all the blood is rushing elsewhere.

Dear Katara,

It’s hard to describe this affliction.

I think to myself,

Is she mine or is she not?

We walk together yet,

We are separated.

 Like the two sides of a river,

Destined to never meet.

You’re near, yet so far.

There is a wall of glass that keeps us apart.

Dear Katara,

Today you wore red. I held your hand and fell for you a lot harder than I had any right to.

Dear Katara,

I feel lost ever since I’ve found you,

There is so much I want to say,

But I know not how to say it,

There is no tongue that I know

Which has the words 

That can correctly describe 

What you are to me.

...

Dear Katara,

Today you insisted I call you Tara. Today you held Izumi and comforted her. Today you said I smelled nice. Today I almost kissed you. I put my hands on you and you were barely sober. Sometimes I disgust myself. 

But I can’t seem to silence the small voice that tells me that you liked it.

Dear Katara, 

What kind of distance is this?

What kind of helplessness?

I touch you everyday, with only my gaze.

But sometimes you grace me with your fragrance,

Sometimes your conversation.

And I feel Agni has given me this world without me asking for it.

Dear Katara,

Why are you angry? Why? Of all the mistakes I’ve made in my life, I’d never have thought lying with a woman would be one of the gravest in your eyes. Let me try to make it up to you, there must have been a misunderstanding! A miscommunication? I don’t know, there must be something to get you to forgive me!

For someone who has convinced himself that he’s stopped loving you, I sure am affected when you don’t speak to me. When you don’t so much as turn my way. And perhaps this is the most vexing part of it all. I don’t understand what is happening, except that I can’t sleep and that I’ll do anything to have you talk to me again.

Dear Katara,

Aang is here. His presence irks me more than I care to admit. And for some reason, mine seems to irk him. I see him try to get closer to you again and a weight settles on my chest. Why?

Why now? After all this time?

The worst part is, somewhere, I may have deluded myself into believing that you and I could be more. Foolish, foolish thought. As if you could view me as anything more than a simple friend. I could see the disgust clearly on your face as you vehemently denied any ties to me. Yet, it’s true isn’t it? We never had anything between us?

Aang warned me off, after you left. He essentially told me, ‘as a friend’ not to get my hopes up with you, because he’d win you back. He needn’t have bothered. Your disgust at the thought of us will probably be etched in my mind forever. Besides, this cannot be more than a physical thing for me. Yes, only a physical attraction. That’s all it ever was. And there is an answer for that.

Dear Katara,

There was something in the air tonight, at the fountain. I can’t describe it. I just felt it. Did you? Just a little bit of magic. Just for a little while. Your eyes sparkled in the moonlight as you glanced at me. 

You looked like a Goddess. 

Dear Katara,

I give up. I can’t, won’t stay away from you. It’s not possible. The hurt in your eyes when I pushed you away. The pain when you found me wounded. The hope and love when I recovered. The blush when you woke up next to me. They all conspire against me. I am not strong enough.

Dear Katara,

You’re trying to get closer to me. Don’t you see that too much has changed. That I’ve changed. And difficult as it seems, I have learned from my mistakes. 

Dear Katara,

You’re back again. You’ve come back to me. I understand that it won’t be for too long now. I understand that I have to let you go. Perhaps this time, I’ll make it easier on myself. 

You’re a friend. A FRIEND. Nothing more. 

What surprised her then, was that there were even older letters in there. Their material crumbling and their ink faded. The date threw her off.

Dear Katara,

They want me to marry again. I won’t do it. I won’t do it. I won’t subject Izumi to some scheming noblewoman who’ll break her. She is only two years old. But also I won’t subject the poor woman to a husband tormented by the ghosts of two others. One who loved him and another who he can’t seem to forget.

Dear Katara,

She gave her life for me. She gave herself for the crown and our daughter. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t. It’s too much to bear. I don’t understand which will kill me first, my guilt or my self-loathing. My daughter keeps me alive, but just barely. I must let you go.

And then there were many more, from around the time his letters had stopped reaching her. Around the time Bumi was born. She frantically opened the two she immediately laid eyes on, hands grasping at any piece of paper they could find.

Dear Katara,

Please write to me. Why won’t you write to me? Please do. I miss you, I miss you, I miss you. I am desperation personified. There is ink in my hair and the stench of alcohol on my clothes as I stare longingly at this parchment that I shall never send to you.

Dear Katara,

You won’t answer my letters and I don’t know why? Is it because I address them to Katara and not Tara? I thought the latter was too familiar, now that you’re a married woman. Besides, I heard that you’re pregnant. The thought fills me with bitterness and I hate myself even more.

Dear Katara,

I’ve been invited to your wedding. The prospect of seeing you getting married makes me want to vomit. I already did that though. Right after I got blackout drunk. I can still taste the bile on my tongue.

Dear Katara

Why does distance from you hurt so?

Why does my life feel incomplete?

Why is it that something singes me, 

When he touches you.

And now my world is on fire.

Dear Katara,

Mai knows. I don’t know how, but she does. She casually asked me about you today. And what could I say? 

And now she picked one of the oldest letters up, its parchment yellow and crinkly. There were splotches on it, as though it had suffered through drops of water.

Dear Katara,

I wonder what you are to me.

I wonder what I was to you.

I wonder what this suffering is.

What is this sorrow?

Why are my eyes wet?

I was sure that it was friendship.

Friendship and nothing more.

But how can I share with you now,

That this was love.

Always was and always will be.

She could not stop herself; she burst into tears. Large fat drops that fell from her eyes and stained the parchment she clutched in her hands. He loved her. He’d always loved her. For years. How had she ever questioned this bond between them? This golden thread that connected them that had survived both time and distance. How had she not realised sooner… 

Katara could barely keep the racking sobs from leaving her body. Behind the letter she now had clutched in her hand, there was another stack of letters; the ones she’d sent him. These looked like they had been opened time and time again, the creases worn and strong. These, she ignored. There was one other letter that called to her though. A fresh one with a gold trim border.

Dearest Katara,

You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, or that you yet love another. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you broke it thirteen years ago. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. For I have loved none but you. 

Yours, Zuko.

“Katara.”

She swivelled around at the sound of his voice. There was pain and hopelessness in his eyes as he stood, taking in the scene in front of him. Katara belatedly realised that she must have looked ghastly, kneeling on the floor, surrounded by pieces of parchment, hiccupping loudly with red and puffy eyes. Nevertheless, she got up and took her first shaky steps towards him.

“Those are the ramblings of a fool. You were not supposed to see them,” he whispered, looking miserable.

“They were addressed to me.”

He only nodded.

“You didn’t send them.”

He placed his face in his hands and nodded again. “And I never planned to. This was my secret, Katara. Mine to take to my pyre. I didn’t want to burden you. You should never have found out.”

“You did not send them,” she repeated, as though in a daze, her voice wobbly. “Not a single one,” she continued, without waiting for a reply. I have every letter you ever sent me. Each and every one. I have them all in a drawer in my room. I used to wait and wait for your hawk those days. I used to read your letters thrice before answering. Even when we stopped exchanging letters, I’ve read and re- read them so many times over the years that I know them all word for word. I have never read these words; you did not send me these,” she finished, gesticulating at the mess on his floor.

Here Zuko looked up, and she could see tears at the corners of his eyes as well. “You...kept my letters?” he asked softly, hesitantly, and she moved closer to him.

“Why have you kept his letters, Katara? His and no one else’s? I was right, wasn’t I? You two had a thing going on! Get rid of them. Please, for our family’s sake.”

“Of course I did! You want to know why Aang suspects us? Why he dislikes you? It’s because he found them and tried to get me to destroy them. I never could. Do you know why some of my letters never reached you in those few months and yours didn’t reach me? Take a wild guess, Zuko,” she said, moving towards him and she could hear her voice breaking.

“I thought…” 

“You thought wrong,” she rasped out. “But that was then. It was a different time. I have been here for more than a year now, why didn’t you tell me?” she asked, reaching him and grabbing his collar, as she felt rational thought leaving her. All there was, was him, the man who’d loved her for so long, so selflessly.

“Why didn’t you tell me, Zuko?” she asked, attacking his broad chest with her fists. They harmlessly bounced off, and she could see her vision cloud with a fresh batch of tears. “ Why??

Then there were hands- warm, large hands, gathering hers to him, pulling her ever closer as he leaned down, his own breath ragged, a drop of salt water not her own falling on their entwined fingers as he touched his forehead to hers. 

“You know what I am. I cannot make speeches. If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more.”

Notes:

Dear Readers,
I have been so, so excited to post this one. I've been thinking about it for ages, and really hope that it came out alright. Long rambly author's notes follow, so here goes:
The Documentation Act: honestly, this one would be a necessity in the ATLA universe and would have been introduced pre LOK. Also, now there is no ambiguity at all, whether Katara is divorced or not. Not that there was earlier, but just to satisfy myself. It's also my personal head canon that she starts dressing in an amalgamation of Fire Nation and Water Tribe after spending all those months away from the poles.
The Great Water Fight- The first draft of this was quite different to this one, and my lovely beta @whisperingwinds and I discussed it, and it is due to her that it is what it is now. I must say, though Katara talks a lot, it was fun writing and a much better and in-character piece now. It was meant to show how Katara has come into her own, as we near the conclusion of the journey she's taken throughout this fic.
Bumi stands up for himself- This part occurred to me pretty late and was inspired by my recent viewing of Fruits Basket. It's a wonderful show, and so impactful. Children most definitely understand what adults say. Also, I just had to include the father figure meme. Come on, how could I not.
The Letters: I've had this idea for months and months. I hope you guys felt all the emotions that I felt while writing this scene. Most of the letters are my own writing, but there are two Jane Austen references which I kind of modified. The letter in the gold trim is adopted from the book Persuasion and Zuko's final confession is from Emma. The poetry are Bollywood songs that I love. Some of the lyrics are so beautiful, they just stick in my head. I'm fairly certain that after I post this chapter, I'll think of a hundred other songs I could have added in. If there are any South Asians or desis reading this, you can try guessing the names of the songs! I might put up links to them on my Tumblr @that-turtleduck (please don't make me include a link to my account, I'm just not good at computers and coding and stuff and it's really stressful at 1 am in the night). As you guys could probably tell, Katara works her way backwards from present to past as she read the letters. Posting this before sleeping, can't wait to read all your reactions in the morning!
Thank you for reading this fic of mine and sticking with me so far, writing this and reading your support has gotten me through some tough patches.
Lots of love,
Sheera

Chapter 22: Tui and La

Notes:

Sorry for the wait, guys. I just didn't know how to go about this chapter. In all honesty, I'm still not too happy, but if I don't post now, I'll never get past this checkpoint. Please keep expectations low.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more.

Through the tears, a smile broke out on Katara’s face, one that she couldn’t wipe off even as she tipped her head back to kiss him. It was a moment of could-have-beens, of the past, and of the future. Of promises that would be kept. Of hope. And once again, as she felt his arms snake around her, she basked in his warmth. She’d never felt this way with anyone else, she realised, and she disengaged hurriedly, because it was imperative that he knew.

“Zuko, I need to tell you something-”

“OH!”

They both startled at the sudden commotion. In the doorway stood three attendants, looking on with varying expressions of dismay and embarrassment. 

“What is it?” Zuko gritted out, sounding quite disgruntled, and she realised that she was still in his arms. Neither of them had let go, and now the attendants were staring. She blushed, but clung to Zuko and looked back at the men steadily. 

“Y-your majesty- majesties- I mean…” one stammered out.

“Firelord Zuko, we need to get you dressed for the Ceremony,” the most stoic one managed to get out. 

“I can dress myself, it won’t take as long,” Zuko replied readily. 

“Zuko, let them do their job,” Katara gently reproached him, extricating herself even as he clung tighter. “I need to get ready as well. I’ll see you downstairs,” she told him, moving to leave, but then thought better of it, rushed back, and gave him one last peck on his scarred cheek, before rushing out past the bemused attendants, smiling to herself. 

She sped to her quarters, heart hammering in her chest. She could barely focus on anything more than putting one foot in front of the other. Halfway there, another thought entered her mind, and she swerved to knock on another door instead. 

“I was just waiting for you,” Ty Lee commented, as she opened the door. Suki waved from behind her, and Katara stared back, still a bit lost, trying to grasp the reality of the situation. 

“You look odd, Katara, and your aura is all funky. Like the blues and pinks are all mixing together. Are you okay?” Ty Lee asked. 

She got no answer. After a pause, she tried again, “Katara? Kataraaaa!”

“He loves me,” Katara finally replied in a monotone, looking dazedly in front of her. Then, as though realising what she’d just said, “He loves me! He loves me !”

There was a loud cackling from inside the room and as she was pulled in, three female voices assaulted her. 

“Okay, spill!!!”

“IS THAT NEWS?!”

“Before we move ahead, can we confirm who ‘he’ is?”

Katara didn’t bring up the letters, and she wouldn’t tell even though Toph kept screaming, “But what led up to it? It was obvious, but we thought he’d never tell! I can’t believe Sparky grew a pair overnight!!”

“Wait, you all knew?” Katara asked, turning abruptly to face Toph from her hotseat.

“Stay still!!” Suki and Ty Lee yelled, various brushes and implements of beauty held aloft as they prepared her for the evening in front of her. 

“It was obvious as day, Sugar Queen.”

 

Getting ready took much longer than anticipated.

Her hair was done up in the most elaborate of braids, half-up-half down and with each step she took, she was scared of dislodging the white and black pearls fastened in the updo. But Katara had faith - she knew her braids. The others had gone on ahead of her while she returned to her room to retrieve the gifts from Zuko. They had sparked an idea. At an event such as this one, everything she did, everything she wore, was a statement. She usually wore either her kuspuk or more often, Fire Nation robes, but in blue. They were better suited for the weather and they conveyed her position and her role. But this was not a regular event – and she had a statement to make. 

Once again, her clothes were in the Fire Nation style, and the sheer material grazed the floors. She was particularly fond of the skirt. It started with a deeper shade of turquoise, but became lighter as it swept past her knees, and was almost completely translucent  towards her ankles, giving  off the appearance of foam. It was quite the optical illusion, and she was aware that with every step the dress rippled and it looked like she was wearing the sea of a sunny Ember Island day. 

Her blouse was a deeper shade of turquoise and made of material that caught the light and shone as did the pearl firelily comb fastened in her hair. That was the only red in her outfit, wearing any more would have been too on-the-nose, she thought, but hints of gold shone everywhere: in the lining of her skirts, along the neckline of the blouse, in her bangles, in the black pearl earrings that Zuko had given her and in the Tui and La necklace she wore with her mother’s. Tui and La – black and white, Fire Nation and Water Tribe, equal and opposite. Also, she was effectively married to Zuko now, to anyone paying attention. She couldn’t wait to see him. She remembered from that ill-fated dance from so long ago how good he’d looked when he dressed up. She remembered not being able to take her eyes off him. Her fingers were tingling with anticipation.

The large hall was just around the corner. Soldiers holding open the grand double doors gawped as she passed. After the dim corridors, it took her eyes a while to adjust. When she could, she noticed that almost all the guests had already assembled, and most were staring at her. There was silence, and the jangle of jewellery was loud as she descended the stairs . She surveyed the room, searching helplessly for the one face she wanted amidst the opulence and finery. She was almost at the bottom, distraught at his absence. The whispering had broken out again and there was a figure in orange, making his way towards her and she was on the verge of making a run for it, appearances be damned when there was a gentle cough from next to her. She stilled and turned.

There he stood: wearing Firelord Regalia with all its trappings. Flame shaped head piece in place along with the wide shoulder pads that always poked her when she got close. There were dragons embroidered in gold on the crimson of his robes and he looked more regal than ever, even as his eyes belied an indescribable softness that she only now understood was love.

She almost squealed out loud. He looks so handsome!! She thought, immediately followed by, ‘It’ll be difficult to get him out of all that.’ It took her considerable effort to pull herself out of that particular fantasy and back to the present. 

“Lady Katara, may I have the honour of this dance?” he demurred, hand outstretched, and Katara’s legs almost wobbled at the cadence of his voice. 

“Yes, of course, My Lord,” she replied, placing her hand in his. It was then she realised that under the metal of his gold armour plates and the red of his robes, he was wearing a dark blue tunic. It was dark enough that it may have passed for black, and out of those who noticed, some may have called it a fashion statement. But for anyone paying attention, the harmony in their outfits was plenty obvious. 

The resonant notes of the shamisen picked up from the back of the room, and Zuko led her away through the throngs. As the crowds parted, she could feel the weight of many eyes until suddenly, the tune picked up as they along with others stepped onto the floor. Zuko began moving, and her feet followed of their own accord to match the rhythm that he set. It was a beautiful, lilting tone and in his arms, she had the distinct feeling of being afloat. For a bit, she allowed herself the luxury of being led through song with only the scent of sandalwood keeping her tethered. After a while, and only when they were out of earshot did he speak.

“You look beautiful, Tara. So beautiful. I don’t know what else to say.”

“Will you write me a letter about today, then?”

“A novel wouldn’t be enough.”

“I wouldn’t think that even you’d find enough to fill a novel,” she said with a smile.

“As I shall be staring at you all night, my love, I should be able to manage ,” he whispered and as the words tickled the delicate skin of her ear lobe, she realised how close they were to each other. She felt herself blush, and averted her eyes.

“All night, my lord? Those are some mighty fine fantasies you have,” she giggled and had the satisfaction of seeing him blush in return, smooth facade gone as quickly as it had come. 

“I- I – didn’t mean to, that is…” 

He stuttered a bit more, and she let him. Her Firelord – the most powerful yet possibly the most awkward man in the land. “You remind me of a blushing school girl before her first kiss, not the almighty ruler of this nation.”

“I’m not a blushing schoolgirl! I’m a grown man. And it’s not my first kiss,” he pouted and she only laughed more. 

“That must’ve been Mai,” Katara mused out loud, partly out of curiosity, and partly to lighten the intensity of the moment. The evening was only beginning and they already had enough people staring at them. To her surprise, she had no problem bringing Mai up. She continued, “Mine was a boy who I met in exile. Smelled of straw and had big dreams of freedom and rebellion.” At this, his eyes widened and he nearly missed a step.

“You are NOT talking of Jet, the teenage terrorist.”

“How did you-?”

“My first kiss was not Mai. Let’s just leave it at that.”

At this, Katara could not hold in the ensuing snort. And then she was laughing again. She’d think she was done, but then a fresh bout of laughter would overtake her, and soon, he was chuckling as well. 

“He was one arrogant bastard,” Zuko chortled.

“You mean to say charming.”

They had to slow down slightly as she laughed till she felt tears in her eyes. The song began winding down, and they slowed down enough to come to a halt. 

They bowed to each other, and just as they parted ways, Zuko whispered to her, “I’ll come get you for the next one, wait for me.”

She nodded in response, she knew what he meant - they both had enough people in the room to talk to. As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t stay with him all evening. She had to let him do his own rounds as she did hers. A little dizzy from the dancing and the laughing, she didn’t have to wander far to stumble on the very people she wanted to see first. Her healers from the North. There was a lot of smirking from that group, and pointed comments about Fire & Water and Tui & La and her possible impending marriage.

“He must be a lucky man,” Tapeesa mused.

“What a gorgeous comb, wherever did you find it?” Yuka asked.

“You are simply glowing today, Lady Katara!” Tall Yue giggled.

No one acknowledged it outright, but she could tell that the women had guessed and were happy for her. Even the older and orthodox, with Uki going so far as to invite her over for special tea before the night ended. It wouldn’t have mattered if they weren’t, she thought. Except it would have. 

With that surge in confidence, she made her way to the next group of people she’d have to greet, pointedly avoiding any orange if she could. Sokka caught up to her midway.

“So… awkward question, dearest sister of mine.”

“Can’t it wait, Sokka? Ah, Minister Chiyo, there you are!”

The Fire Nation nobles were all too easy to please, after all, even without the Fire Lord’s favour, she held some important offices and most of them wanted to be on her good side. It was the perfect opportunity to set the groundwork for some projects that she was interested in. It turned out to be more difficult than expected because ever so often, Zuko’s eyes would meet hers and he’d give her a secret smile, meant for just the two of them and her focus would fly out the window. There were three separate instances when she was asked if she was paying attention.

In the end, there were quite a few nobles to dance with, some wearing red, while some wore green. One or two of her tribesmen approached her as well, including Bato’s son who turned out to be quite the dancer. “Looks like you have a crown in your hair, my Lady,” he smirked, and she grinned in response. “Also, if you don’t give Sokka an answer, he’s going to talk my ear off. Please, have mercy.”

“I will talk to him. Tomorrow,” she answered. “Sorry.”

She knew what Sokka wanted to talk to her about. She'd guessed by the way his eyes kept darting between the two of them. This was a long talk, one she wanted to have in the morning, with some tea as they discussed their future. She’d only just come to the realisation that she wanted to spend time with Zuko. Days, weeks, months, years if he’d have her. She wanted to gather her thoughts before they delved into the topic. Also, it was really funny to keep Sokka in the lurch. 

At this, Amaruq looked sullen, but didn’t press the issue, and after the dance was over, left to chase after Yuka. A little tired, Katara approached the food table for a quick bite and some quiet. She only got the former.

“My lovely sister, Katara-” came her brother’s voice from her right. It looked like he’d been dogging her footsteps all evening.

“Oh, is that Haru? I hear he’s with the Earth Kingdom delegation, I haven’t seen him in ages!” she exclaimed, fleeing immediately.

“Wait-”

Unfortunately, this tactic didn’t quite work out because Haru was talking to an Air Accolyte. As much as she didn’t want her evening ruined by Sokka’s Big Brother talk about Zuko and all its ensuing histrionics, she definitely would have preferred that over the vile glances the woman in yellow was throwing her way. Even Haru caught on to it after a while. 

“Do you want to uhh maybe da-”

“Why, if it isn’t Haru! Long time, old friend!” Zuko said, having appeared miraculously. This outburst was very out of character, primarily because she was unsure if they’d ever been friends. What followed was probably one of the most dreadfully awkward conversations she’d been part of. The acolyte (Rina?) kept making pointedly derogatory comments about Katara. Haru or Zuko would counteract, while both simultaneously trying to one-up each other. Katara swore she could hear Toph cackling as she passed them. Deciding that enough was enough, Katara pulled at Zuko’s sleeve. 

“My lord, might I request the next dance?”

This was an effective ploy, she decided, pulling Zuko away. He smirked at Haru, who only looked mildly amused while Rina spat at her the most malevolent glare yet.

“What is up with you?” she hissed at Zuko. “I wasn’t done with talking to everyone!”

“He was infatuated with you at the Air Temple,” Zuko replied curtly. “And he was flirting with you now. Well most of them were, but he irked me. He’s irksome.”

“Well, well, well. Look how the tables have turned. Who’s the jealous one now?” she asked, smirking.

“Not jealous. Just annoyed,” Zuko muttered.

“Annoyed at what?” Katara giggled.

“The world,” he said with all the airs of a grumpy sixteen year old.

Katara sighed. “He may have had a thing for me years ago. But the only one on my mind right now is you,” she whispered to him. At this, he positively beamed.

She continued, smirking, “And the only thing I’m thinking of right now, is how I’m going to show you all night long.”

His ears turned bright red at this, even as he pulled her in closer and whispered, “I bet those are some mighty fine fantasies, my Lady.”

“Hmm… turns out I have had quite a few of them this evening.” 

He growled lowly at this. The sound reverberated through her body, sending  waves of pleasure straight to her core. “Katara… please, have mercy!” he groaned. “Do you know how difficult it is for me to stand here and talk to these people when the alternative is lying with you? Holding you, kissing you, f- It’s so difficult to focus on anything when you’re here looking like that. You’re even wearing what I gave you for everyone to see! I know what that means now.”

“Well they were very pretty gifts,” she said nonchalantly.

“Is that the only reason you wore them?” he asked, looking slightly hurt.

The song died down, and she skipped out of his arms, leaving him staring after her. “Song’s over. I’ll tell you next time!” she said, rushing away to speak to Toph. 

Toph had successfully managed thirteen different sexual innuendos in the span of five minutes when a voice interrupted their conversation.

“Well met, Katara, my loveliest sister. I have a question for you – and before you leave, don’t forget that I can ask Zuko the same thing.” Sokka spoke from behind her.

Katara sighed, turning around. “What is it?”

Sokka’s eyes bulged. He clearly hadn’t expected to get this far. “Are you… are you… going out with Zuko?”

“Don’t you have better things to do? Like dancing with your wife?” Katara countered.

“Yes. He does. Although he hasn’t done that yet,” Suki answered from behind them both. She winked at Katara, and dragged a spluttering Sokka away. 

Katara grinned, and searched for Zuko again. She had tried not to lose sight of him all night. He had danced with quite a few women, but after every dance, somehow his eyes would find hers and he’d wink. It sent flutterflies in her stomach and up her throat, which she then had to gulp down. This slight respite between dances gave her enough time to get something substantial to eat. Through the periphery of her vision, she saw an orange figure moving towards her before it was intercepted by a small green one. Both then moved to the dance floor. Katara was more thankful than ever for her friends. 

The minutes ticked on, and she met and talked to a number of other people. She did have one dance with Aang. It was as uncomfortable as she’d imagined, and made even more so with the scores of onlookers. Though she kept as much distance between them as she could, and spoke as curtly as she could, he still almost managed to get under her skin. 

“You look pretty!”

“Thank you.”

“Who gave you the comb?”

“Someone.”

“Do you remember the first time we danced together?”

“I do.”

“Could you have imagined this future?”

“No.”

“It was really fun dancing with you then, do you think we should go faster?”

“No. This is fine.”

She left as soon as she could, running straight into Sokka. Suki was nowhere to be seen. Katara groaned internally. 

“Okay, I’m going to ask you outright. Are you dating Zuko? Yes or No.”

“I don’t know. Am I?” she countered once again, giggling nervously. 

“What sort of answer is that?! I, Sokka, your brother needs to know!”

“Later, Sokka ," she said, completely blotting him out as she caught sight of something in the distance. Then, she was striding towards Zuko. He'd had told her he’d ask her to dance again when he was done with his social rounds, but now it was time to seek him out. Especially because she’d just seen him with that woman. 

“Oh darling, you look simply gorgeous! No wonder everyone’s smitten with you!” Kuwa said, spotting her first. 

“Good evening to you too, Lady Kuwa. You look well.” It was late at this point, many people had left and the party, a grand success, was dying down. Clearly the woman was here to proposition Zuko, she thought. 

“Why thank you! As I was telling Zuko here-”

Katara stiffened, and Zuko got an odd look on his face. 

“That’s Firelord Zuko to you. And I’m afraid but I’ll have to pull him away from your wonderful company,” Katara said, threading her arm through his as she began dragging him away. 

“I was just telling him that the two of you make a lovely couple. I’m very happy that he finally mustered the courage to tell you how he felt.”

Katara’s eyes widened as she stopped, but when she turned around, Lady Kuwa of Silk Mulberry estate was already walking away, waving as she went. “Just so you know, my offer still stands!” she said loudly and Katara blushed.

“Dance with me,” Zuko whispered from next to her, while she kept staring at the woman’s retreating form. She nodded. As they returned to the dance floor, she relaxed into the warmth of his embrace, allowing herself to be pulled closer than was strictly appropriate. 

It was a faster dance, and as they spun around to the beat, the other dancers cleared the way, till there was almost no one left on the floor. It was thrilling, and it felt like a spar. Or at least as quick as one and Katara forgot about her earlier irritation. The remaining attendees lined the walls and watched the two of them. Faster and faster they went, as he pulled her ever closer. She kept up with him, urging him, pushing into him. They were equals in skill and grace; well matched, move for move. The music swelled, and he whispered to her, “Ready?”

“Yes.”

And with the tempo, he picked her up by the waist and swung her around, to the gasps of the onlookers. But she only had eyes for him, his own warm and bright as he smiled widely and slowly let her down, holding her steady. The beat slowed, but they didn’t let go. The next song picked up, a slower one. One she recognized. 

“Four Seasons again,” Zuko commented. Katara was silent. She was slowly being pulled into the dance, a cocoon of their own making.

“Are we that obvious,” she wondered out loud, thinking back to Kuwa. 

He was silent for a while, thoughtful. “Maybe. Does that worry you?” he asked, and she could sense the insecurity behind his eyes.

“If it did, I wouldn’t have dressed this way,” she replied, lifting her hand to caress the scarred side of his face. Then, as though realising something, she blurted out, “You wore blue.” 

“You wore red,” he answered.

“No, I didn’t.”

“What's this then?” he asked, pointing to the firelily hairpiece.

“It’s a gift from a friend,” she answered haughtily. 

“Must be a very special friend, if you’ve accepted his marriage proposal. Twice,” Zuko murmured into her hair.

“I couldn’t refuse,” she whispered, into his neck. “Not when they’re such beautiful gifts, not when you mean so much to me.” At this, Zuko tipped her chin up to face him, a question in his eyes. She took a moment to frame her reply.

“No, it doesn't worry me that we’re being obvious. I’m just happy that I get to dance with you. I’ve wanted to for a long, long time. Even then, all those years ago. I was waiting for you to ask me.” 

“You know well enough by now, that I would have given anything for a single dance with you. I still find it hard to believe that you’re here with me now. That I get to hold you,” he said, pulling her flush against him.

Katara smiled wanly at him as she asked, “Where have you been, all these years my lord?”

“Waiting for you, my love,” he whispered and Katara’s eyes widened.

“Say that again,” she said, bringing her palm up to cup his cheek. 

He looked confused for a moment, before his expression cleared. “My love.”

“My love,” she replied, taking a moment as she looked into his eyes. But there was no doubt, no hesitation now and she smiled. Their movements had slowed, so that they were only swaying to the beat, spinning in the same circle.

“I’ve wanted to tell you, Zuko. I’ve wanted to say it for such a long time. I was unsure of myself, of all the history that we share. And I was worried for my children. But you have been everything that I’ve needed, every step of the way. You have been my enemy, my friend, a father to the kids and… and the love of my life,” she admitted finally. It was like letting out a breath she hadn’t known she was holding. “You were never alone in this. I have loved you for such a long time now, without even realising it and I can’t take it anymore. I just can’t; you have to know. I love you. I love you. I’ve loved you for years. And I don’t want to keep pretending that I don’t.”

Tirade finished, she took a deep breath and noticed that there were tears in Zuko’s eyes. One slipped and fell on her cheek as he leaned closer and the rest of the world disappeared. Her vision blurred and she realised that she was tearing up as well. 

“I thought I wouldn’t hear you say that. Definitely not in this life. I’ve been scared too, Tara. Scared that I’d lose you for good. Scared of the repercussions. But there’s nothing to fear now, huh?” he said with a shaky laugh. “Not if you’re with me.”

She could barely reply to that, as she leaned her head against his broad chest, eyes scrunched together to prevent the moisture from slipping out.

“May I?” he whispered, fingers playing under her chin. And without pause, Katara raised herself up and pressed her lips to his. It was like their first kiss all over again. Fireworks in some distant corner of her head and just a hint of spice on her lips as he caught on and kissed her back. There might have been gasps, there might have been widened eyes, there might have been outbursts from the guests. Katara didn’t care. She simply continued kissing Zuko as his arms tightened around her and the smell of sandalwood enveloped her. She revelled in the slight press of his lips against hers and the way they seemed to just fit together. He was her home, and she would fight anyone who tried to take him away. 

After ages or maybe weeks or maybe even seconds, they split apart, panting slightly. Zuko looked like he’d been knocked out by a cudgel, but still grinned dopily. She giggled, burrowing her face in his neck.

They danced some more after that. The passage of time was hazy. All Katara knew was that the candles kept getting dimmer bit by bit. There seemed to be an altercation off to the side with some raised voices, and an orange figure departing swiftly from the hall but she couldn’t bring herself to care. Molten eyes held her captive. Strong arms held her in place with their comforting and familiar warmth, and soft lips bestowed sweet words and kisses on her. If this was a dream, she decided that she never wanted to wake up.

Soon the room was bathed in only the dimmest of lights, with most people vanished as though by magic. 

“It’s late, we should go to bed,” Zuko said. 

“We should,” she replied, holding on to his hand tightly. They went up the staircase in silence, and Katara came out of her daze with every step. Her room lay to the right, but…

She pulled him along to the left.

“Are… are you sure?” he asked.

“What happened to staring at me all night, Firelord?”

“If you haven’t realised, it’s all I’ve been doing,” he said, as they rounded the turn to his quarters. He dismissed his soldiers, as he pulled her through the doors and into his arms. 

Katara rose on her tiptoes, slipping one hand into his hair and dragging her nails through it, dislodging the headpiece as she did. He pulled it out, tossing it away to the floor. He ducked, sweeping her off her feet and into his arms with one fluid motion as he stepped into his room. She held onto him, taking the time to run her hands through his beautiful smooth locks. His face was turned to her, and he looked at her with an intensity to melt glass. She vowed that this wouldn’t be the last time she’d see his face with this expression; of awe and passion and longing. Placing her carefully in the centre of his large bed, he stood and surveyed her, as though unsure where to go from here. Katara wondered how she looked, with mussed up hair, lips swollen from kissing, and eyes that were probably too bright. 

“Come to me,” she whispered, and he did, covered her body with his, kissing her deeply. But before she could relish in it, he was making his way down her neck, leaving featherlight kisses across her jaw. He sucked at her pulse point as she squirmed underneath him, twisting her hands around him with a slight jangle of jewellery. He gently scraped his teeth over the delicate skin at her throat, tongue soothing the sting and she let out a long drawn out moan.

***

 

 

“I’ll make sure I hear more of those, many more,” he rasped.

She tried pulling his face back to hers, and he let her for a minute, tongues tangling as he pulled her blouse down, palming at her breasts. When he pressed his thumbs over her nipples roughly she let out a strangled “Zu-Zuko…”

The pressure at her thighs throbbed and she pulled him closer. Unfortunately, he was still wearing his armoured plates and she winced as they dug into her. Immediately she felt his pressure off her. 

“No! No, come back!” she whimpered. 

“I’m not going anywhere,” Zuko answered as he dipped down to her navel, dipping his tongue in and sucking loudly. Grasping her hips, he pulled her roughly to him, leaving open mouthed kisses all over the exposed skin of her abdomen. Katara groaned loudly, fingers tangling in his head as she pulled him further into her. 

He finally moved further down, rucking up her skirt as he did. He bit lightly at the sensitive skin along her inner thighs and she jerked upwards. Encouraged, he continued towards her core, and as the wetness at her apex pooled, she sunk into the feeling, knowing she’d want  mementos from this night. She shivered and arched up, wordlessly asking for more. He looked up, eyes glazed. “Do you want me to continue?” 

YES she wanted to scream out. Instead, she replied, “Only if you want to.”

“Oh I’ve wanted to for way too long.” He said, pushing her legs apart. Katara keened as he bit her inner thigh lightly once again before inhaling the wetness at her undergarments. Restless, she pulled him further towards her core, thighs clamping around him.

“You smell delicious,” he murmured as he ran his nose up her covered slit.

“Hu- hurry up then,” she managed to grind out.

In answer, he dragged his thumb over her sensitive bud through her now soaked wraps. She blushed, but he looked pleased. He did it again, with more pressure and she bucked and moaned into his hand. She needed more, but he moved away. She almost complained again, but realised that he was only trying to open her wraps. After half a minute of this, she could smell burned cloth and they fell away.

“Zuko!” She exclaimed, sitting up with her elbows.

“I’ll buy you more. I’ll buy you as many as you want,” he nearly growled.  

And then, looking up in her eyes, he moved forward slowly, and licked a stripe up her bare skin from centre to clit. She blushed and almost made an effort to cover herself up, but the heat and lust shining in smouldering gold eyes, stopped her.

“You look beautiful, every part of you,” he said reverently, and then levelling his face with her, he inhaled deeply, nose touching her bud and she jerked once more. He then began a vigorous sucking of her clit, tongue slipping into her centre and up and around her lower lips. Her body writhed under his ministrations, eyes clenched shut and seeing stars. It was an assault on her senses and she would have slipped off the bed had he not held her down with his hands on her hips, fingers bruising.

“I can’t get enough of you,” he said between slurps, as his tongue delved in as she arched off the bed, screaming his name.

He stopped again and looked in her eyes. More, she wanted more, why was he stopping ? Then, taking one of her hands, he placed it on the back of his hair. Katara gripped the locks and pressed him in. He circled her clit with his tongue and sucked. Hard. 

She could hear a high pitched moan and took a minute to realise that it was coming from her. She felt like she was about to combust, yet Zuko gave her no chance to let up. 

Pressing his face in, he set about vigorously licking her cunt like a starved man. When he leaned back to take a breath, she pressed him back in, spreading her legs wider. “You’re so much more delicious than I thought you’d be.” He told her. “And I’ve thought about this a lot.

Setting his lips around her bud, he flicked it relentlessly and she let out a series of incoherent sounds. One of his hands went up and around her breasts, squeezing almost painfully. 

“Zuko!!” She screamed, spasming around nothing. 

“Mhm ?”

“Zuko- If- if you don’t right now..."

“Don’t what? What do you want me to do, love?” He asked, smirking devilishly, continuing with agonising kitten licks on her clit.  

“Uhhh,” she managed as he slurped up the slick off her thighs  loudly. “Need you. I need-“ she managed to gasp out, as her legs clamped around his head

“Is this what you need?” He asked her, sliding his tongue in.  

She positively mewled, trying to form a coherent answer, but as he continued, all she could manage was  further babbling. “Zu- Zuko,” she finally managed to gasp.

“Louder, my love,” he said, pausing to look up at her, face shining.

Once again, he delved in, tongue flicking over her in the most incandescent manner as she moaned and before she realised it, she was screaming his name, a wave roaring about her ears. It crashed and crashed and she revelled in it. Finally, it settled around her and she came to. When she had enough awareness return to her, she realised that she had coated Zuko’s face with her slick, and he was in front of her still, licking her through it all, unwilling to let any drop of her spill out. When there was nothing left, he pulled up, and sat in front of her, a very visible tent in his pants. Leaning up she kissed him hard, tasting herself on him as she palmed him urgently. 

But he leaned back. “Let’s get you out of this first,” he said, pulling out a bead from her hair. He slowly and carefully undressed her then, taking his time with it. As each article of clothing came off, his hands would linger or sometimes his lips, reverence in his eyes. Soon, she was only in the jewellery he’d given her. After the intensity of the previous moments, this one seemed soft and real. She was really here, with him in his bed. The light of the full moon bathed him, her Zuko and she leaned up to pepper his face with soft kisses as she felt herself stir again. Then he was getting up, he tugged off his armour and upper robes as he did, till he was only in his pants. 

She beckoned him to her again, and this time, they went about it slowly, exploring each other, kissing and teasing. She licked up his abdomen in small kitten licks, biting playfully at his nipples and he groaned, loudly. She found that she quite liked the sound. He retaliated by fervently sucking at her breasts and she found herself moaning alongside him. They were a mess of roving hands and entangled limbs awash in moonlight. 

Soon, Katara was panting again, as she pulled Zuko down on her. 

“Need you,” she whispered. “Need you now.”

When he entered her, she felt rather than saw stars. He was slow, trying to ease into her, restraint on his face, but she was more than ready. Grabbing him by his hips, she urged him on, as he sunk  into her, bottoming out. His hair cascaded around them like a waterfall, obstructing all else as ember like eyes shone down on her, pupils blown wide. She rose up to kiss him, sucking on his lip as she lifted her hips to meet his. 

“I- I love you,” he whispered to her as he picked up speed, feverishly gripping her to him, and Katara felt her breath catching. 

“I love you too,” she whispered, fingers entangling in his hair again, and his eyes darkened. His hand came up to lift the pit of her knee as his pace increased and he lost himself in the motions. Fingers played at her bud, urging her on and then she was screaming his name once more.

“ZUKO!!” 

She came, and then, so did he, groaning her name loudly as he did. She felt his warmth fill her up and spill out as she kept her eyes open and fixed upon his face, memorising his expressions. 

 

 

***

Then, letting out a deep breath, he sagged into her slightly before rolling away carefully. She moved to cuddle him, pulled in by the heat she was craving, but he was already moving off the bed. Confused, she sat up to see him make his way across the room to the washbasin. She smiled softly as he brought a washcloth to her skin, and bent to clean her up carefully. Sated, Katara laid back on the bed as he returned to pull up the covers around them both. Only then did she pull him to her and burrow into his chest, feeling the warm rise and fall. 

“I still can’t believe you’re real,” he whispered. “I can’t believe that you’re here, with me,” he said, pulling his arm up and around her. “This has to be some lovely dream.”

“It’s real, Firelord. It’s real today and it’ll be real tomorrow.”



Notes:

So this turned out to be a little anticlimactic. But there are some serious conversations coming in the next couple of chapters. This one had Zuko and Katara coming to terms with their relationship, and realising they both wanted this, political implications be damned. It was also Katara deciding that she just didn't care anymore, she only wanted to be with the man she'd loved for years.

I did not want an Aang confrontation, because it would be a tad too unreasonable on an international platform like this one. He has an image to maintain as the Avatar after all. Also, his friends were there to reason with him and lessen the blow, but it is coming. But man, this chapter and the last have just turned into The Worst Day of Aang's Life.
Katara ignores Sokka partially to mess with him and partially because she wants to have a serious conversation later, and not at the moment when she needs her wits about her to do some political manoeuvring.
If there are any artists out there reading this, I'd love to see Katara in the dress. *hint hint*
My lovely, lovely beta @whisperingwinds helped me tonnes especially with the smut which I thoroughly enjoyed writing. I might have wrung myself dry right now, but I definitely want to try and include some more in the next chapter! This is for all those who said I was just torturing them with the will-they-won't-they for so many chapters 😂 Well, they have now, so I hope this makes up for it!

Chapter 23: Family

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

It took a while for Katara’s vision to clear. Blearily blinking the sleep from her eyes, she found herself in unfamiliar territory yet again. Red sheets, red curtains filtering the sunlight coming through East-facing windows. She stirred. This was not her room. Even the bedding felt too firm, she realised as she felt a warm arm come up from behind her to pull her closer to the warm body.

“You like to cuddle in your sleep,” a gravelly voice told her from above.

Then it all came back to her: letters, confessions, the dancing and what ensued. She looked up at Zuko with eyes gone soft. He smiled back at her lazily. It was the most relaxed she’d seen him. 

“Does that bother you?” she asked, her own voice rough from sleep.

“Not at all,” he told her with a warm grin. She was pressed up against his body and involuntarily, she felt herself stirring. He was close, so close. And all hers.

“Then you’ll have no problem getting used to it,” she smiled, getting up to wash her mouth, even as he tried to hold on to her. The covers slid off as she pushed off the bed, and she immediately felt his eyes follow her. When she returned, she found a very bright eyed man eyeing her form, pronounced bulge below.

“Rise and shine, Firelord,” she smirked as she climbed into bed and into his arms again.

“It is a fine morning indeed, Lady Katara,” he whispered, leaning down to kiss her lips lightly. But she squirmed, pushing herself against him, till he opened his mouth and she slid her tongue in. Rolling over him, she kissed him back languidly, tongue tangling with his. There was no rush, they had all the time in the world. And she wanted to savour it. She had found herself flushed and quivering since she’d  woken up in such a position. She’d be damned if she didn’t take advantage of it. 

She climbed atop Zuko, hands on either side of his head as she kissed him hungrily. Zuko reciprocated, his interest clearly evident against her thigh as his fingers tangled in her hair.

Katara’s mouth slid down to the juncture of his neck and shoulder and she bit into it, tongue lapping up the spot to ease the sting. He groaned loudly. 

“Mine,” she whispered, looking into his eyes. 

“Yours,” he agreed, hands on her waist, as he pressed her into him. She placed his earlobe in her mouth and scraped it gently with her teeth. Zuko jerked from underneath her, and she giggled.

**

 

 

 

Letting go, she pulled back to leave kisses along his neck and chest as she made her way down to  his nipple. He moaned loudly. 

“Tease,” he managed to gasp out and she giggled again. But then she felt his fingers at her bud and very quickly it was her turn to moan. He kept flicking at her and she felt her desire pool. 

“Fuck, you’re wet,” she heard him say as he took a breast into his mouth. He sucked on it, and she felt like she could come on the spot. Pushing him down, she raised herself up, positioning herself over him. He kept looking at her,eyes gone dark, until she slowly lowered herself down all the way. They both gasped loudly.

“Move, love,” he ground out and his grip turned bruising. She began moving then, slowly at first, then picking up tempo. Her hair, wild and unruly, crashed behind her, the tips touching his legs. She lost herself in the movements, taking her pleasure of him, as his fingers joined the fray, egging her on towards completion. 

“You look like a goddess,” he gasped. 

And as he rose to kiss her wildly, tongues clashing, fingers speeding up, she lost herself as wave after wave rushed over her. She almost didn’t realise when he turned them over, as he took over for both of them. She helplessly folded her legs around him as his thrusts slowly lost their rhythm and he groaned out his release. There was silence for a while before he moved.

 

 

**

“I think I’m going to declare today a national holiday,” he said, flopping back on the bed. She rolled to cuddle him, unwilling to let go just yet. She hummed in response, fingers playing with his black locks.

“Before I forget, can you do something for me?” she asked him suddenly, an idea sparking in her mind.

“Anything.”

“Can… can you…” she began, suddenly shy. He quirked a brow at her. 

She set her mind to it. “Can you tell me your heart burns for me?” She finished in a rush. She remembered an imaginary Zuko telling her in that fever dream from so many months ago. It had stuck in her mind.

Zuko chuckled deeply, propping himself up, “Where did that come from?”

“Just say it,” she said, nose in air even as her cheeks burned.

“My heart burns for you, Katara of the Southern Water Tribe,” he said, suddenly serious, molten eyes looking into hers. “I love you,” he finished and she smiled brightly. 

“I love you too, Zuko of the Caldera,” she said, just as seriously. 

“Scars and all?” he asked her wryly, and she knew that he was asking her about more than his physical appearance. She took a while to formulate her answer because this was clearly important to him. Then, stroking his scarred cheek, she replied,

“I think your scars are beautiful. They’ve made you who you are now. The man I’m in love with. They are part of you, and if I am to have you, I will have the whole package, scars and all and nothing less.”

He just looked at her. And looked and looked.

“Now who’s the poet?” he asked her finally with a smile, but his eyes were shining. “By the way, I’m not letting you go till you tell me where the heart on fire thing came from,” he said, pulling her closer to him. She kissed him instead of answering. They never made it to breakfast.

 

All attendees were given one day off post conference, which was when Katara saw her brother next. It was at lunch in the gardens and he was fuming, glaring daggers at an already seated Zuko. She carefully made her way over, taking a seat next to Zuko, with a light kiss to his cheek. 

“Sokka has just found out that everyone at this table knew of you and Zuko, except him. And Yue,” Suki informed her. 

“That’s so amazing, Auntie K! I never would have guessed!” the girl squealed. Sokka just grunted. 

“I will explain, Sokka. Let’s talk later?” Katara asked him. He just nodded tersely.

The conversation picked up as everyone planned out the rest of their day. Suki had been invited to visit a nearby martial arts centre, and Katara thought it would be a good experience for all the kids to go with her, but they had other plans.

“Dadko, how about a ride on Druk?” Bumi exclaimed loudly.

“We promise to do all our homework on time,” Kya said.

“If you let us go by ourselves, we’ll also throw in a noodle portrait of you by Tenzin,” Bumi continued.

“I’m very good at them now, Uncle Zuko,” Tenzin said earnestly.

“Please, Dad?” Izumi asked.

“It’s okay if you say no, Dadko, we’ll just hate you forever,” Kya sing-songed.

Zuko laughed, “Well it seems your blackmail skills have vastly improved. I think I’m going to tell Uncle to go back to Ba Sing Se now, his job is done. It should be okay-”

“Nope, it’s not,” Katara butted in. “Kya I’m very certain I have not seen you do any homework whatsoever, Bumi you broke two flowerpots yesterday, you are absolutely grounded for a week. Literally. Izumi, it will be better for you to go with Suki to see martial arts, especially because these two aren’t going anywhere and you have not been attending any of your Firelord lessons. You just stay indoors with us all the time, don’t think I haven’t noticed.”

“Mom!” Bumi and Kya yelled in unison. But it was the third voice that surprised everyone.

“That’s unfair! Kya has done some of her homework, and I’ll help her do the rest of it right away! We’ll get it done by tomorrow. And I have been attending my lessons! I did… I have… I was at training three days ago!” Izumi shouted back. 

Everyone at the table stilled, and Katara noticed Zuko’s eyes widen. This was not a side of his daughter that people saw regularly.

“You’re not going to defend me?” Bumi asked timidly.

“That was your fault and you know it,” the girl said, pushing her spectacles up her nose.

Katara cleared her throat. “No can do. You need to manage your tone of voice, young lady. And you can’t bully your father like that. Go out with Suki, she has tons of experience in fighting and leadership and she has a lot to teach you girls. We will make a decision on Druk in a few days, maybe then you can go.”

“Ugh, MOM!”

But it wasn’t Bumi or Kya, who’d said it this time. Nor was it Tenzin. Everything stilled as the breeze rattled through the garden. Izumi went pink, stood up and ran away, food half-eaten. Katara shared a look with Zuko before getting up and following her.

She rushed through the foliage, almost tripping on an overgrown root as she searched for any flash of red.

“Izumi? Izumi, where are you?” She called out, half out of breath as she lifted her skirts to cut through the grass.

But the girl was fast and knew her way around the gardens. After nearly a half hours’ searching, Katara was on the verge of giving up – maybe Izumi did not wish to be found. But that was when she saw a patch of red in the shrubbery and stilled. 

Approaching carefully, she stretched her hand out, as she would to a baby sky bison. Katara knew that the crunch of her footsteps would alert Izumi and give her plenty of time to run away if she truly did not wish to have this conversation right now. But the girl sat still, with hunched shoulders, back to her. And the rhythmic heave in them, betrayed a vast depth of emotion. 

“I never met Firelady Mai. I know she’s my mother. But I don’t even have the faintest… vaguest memory of her,” Izumi began, voice tainted with tears. “Just a feeling of warmth and a smile… I think? Dad tried his best for my sake and I never needed anyone else. But… but I’ve always wondered if I was missing something,” she sobbed. “It’s such a horrible thing to think, when he tried so hard. I wanted to know why my friends swore by and adored their mothers so much. I got so excited when Dad got girlfriends, but they never lasted and they never liked me. But then, you came along and I finally think I understand. I’m sorry Auntie K, I’m so embarrassed. You’ve been nothing but kind to me, and I’ve started thinking of you as my Mom. Can we just ignore it and go back to how things were? I promise I won’t be weird.”

Katara chuckled lightly, and came up to Izumi, turning her around with ease . The girl didn’t resist, tearstained little face coming into view. 

“You know, it’s been a fair few months since I’ve thought of you as my own. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to burden you. I’m honoured that you called me Mom, Izumi. You’ve been a daughter to me for so long now, and I love you like one.”

At this, Izumi perked up, “Really?!”

“Yes, absolutely. You can call me Auntie K, or Mom or whatever you want. It won’t change the fact that I see you as my daughter. But call me Mom and it’ll make yelling at you that much easier.”

“Be serious, M- Auntie K!” Izumi said, looking distressed and tearful.

Katara laughed again, before gathering her daughter for a hug. “Call me Mom, Izumi. Nothing would please me more.”

Izumi hugged her back, tighter than ever before, as though she was scared to let go. Then, she stiffened and let go. “Isn’t this a betrayal? To Mother?”

Katara smiled sadly and took off her daughter’s glasses, wiping them clean of the moisture. “As a mother, I can verify that the only thing I’ll ever want for my children - in this life and the next - is for them to be happy. Nothing else really matters. You may understand when you grow older.”

Izumi looked confused, but nodded, leaning her head on Katara’s shoulder. Katara let her stay, patting her head gently. The sobs slowly receded, leaving just shallow quiet breaths in their wake. Katara had wondered when they’d have this conversation. She’d seen it coming from some time, but hadn’t picked up the courage to speak up herself. Thinking back, she really couldn’t believe how entwined her and Zuko’s lives had gotten. After a while, she spoke up. There was something else she had to ask.

“This may not be the best time, but I need to have a conversation with you, Izumi. Woman to woman-”

“I give you my permission to marry Dad,” Izumi said, looking up at her and nodding away seriously. 

Katara was aghast. She’d only wanted to know if she could date Zuko. “What-?”

“You don’t want to?” Izumi asked, perplexed.

“I – I think I do… ” Katara said, admitting it almost to herself. Her face and neck were aflame as she realised the truth in her words. 

“Good, it’s settled then, Mom,” Izumi said, snuggling back into her embrace. “You’ll stay here with us then? Instead of going back to the Pole?”

Katara paused for a moment, mind reeling from the pace at which they had gone through the topic at hand and then sighed. “Is that why you haven’t been attending your lessons? Because you want to spend more time with us?”

Izumi nodded. 

“I’ll still have to leave, sweetheart. I have duties towards my people in the South. And… it’s been more than a year. I miss it. The tundra, the Southern lights.”

There was silence then, as Izumi’s thin hands held her tighter, and Katara felt moisture on her shoulder. 

“I will always still love you, even from a distance. And nothing could make me stop loving your father. I’ll return, I promise. Give me some time, huh?”

A tiny hiccup interrupted the quiet that followed, and Katara pulled Izumi forward to wipe the tears and snot from her face. 

“I understand. I don’t want to, but I do,” the girl said finally.

And then they sat for a while longer on the soft grass, breeze rustling the leaves in the trees and dancing on strands of hair. When Katara looked up a while later, it was into Zuko’s eyes. He was smiling as well. She beckoned him over, and he came and brought his arms up and around the two of them. Izumi gripped them both fiercely, as she began quietly crying again.

“Is this a group hug?” came Kya’s voice a minute later.

“We’re joining, come on, Tenny!” Bumi yelled, and then it became a tangle of arms and faces, and Katara’s heart felt so full, like it could burst.  

The six of them stayed together, that beautiful afternoon, the first of many as the sun swept across the sky. 

Katara went searching for her brother much later. The moon was out and she prayed to Yue that the next conversation would go well. She found Sokka waiting for her, in her quarters, a frown on his face as he fiddled with his latest invention. 

“Sokka.”

He looked up, eyes wary but a smile on his face. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t know it myself. We were just dating, seeing where this would take us if we let it. I never thought… I never expected…” and she hid her face in her hands.

“Do you love him?”

“Yes. I do. Without a doubt,” she said, raising her head up to look him in his eyes. Sokka just nodded. 

“And him? Does he love you?”

“He does, he’s told me as such. Oh Sokka, he’s loved me since we were young, since before I got married and I think… no I know , that I have as well. He’s so kind, and good and he’s a great father and everything I’ve wanted, everything I’ve needed. I’ve been such a fool, why didn’t I realise it earlier?!”

At this, Sokka’s said thoughtfully, “Well, you don’t have my smarts, so that is expected-”

“Ugh! Sokka! We’re having a moment!”

Sokka only smiled, “Yes, yes, I know.”

Then the smile wavered and fell flat. Cautiously, he said, “You know, ever since I came here and met you, it’s like the old you. The one from years ago, my amazing baby sister. Talented, confident, loved by everyone she talks to. At first I thought it was just the divorce, or because you’ve been given some power and space to do what you love, but it’s him isn’t it? He’s pulled you through all this?”

“Not just him, Sokka. You, Suki, Dad, Bumi, Izumi, Kya and Tenzin. And now Toph as well. Everyone. But especially him, I guess. And before you ask, no he’s not rushed me into anything. He’s been nothing but kind and patient and understanding and-”

“Okay, okay I get it,” Sokka said, hands facing up in surrender. “But why didn’t you tell me? Has one year really changed that much between us, sister? Will I lose you forever if you do get married and come here?”

Katara shook her head violently. “No, no, Sokka!! That’s not it! I really wanted to keep this quiet, until we were sure of ourselves. I mean, we’re not just two ordinary people, as much as I would wish that were the case. Our personal lives have … implications. The others, they just guessed and then he confessed to me last night and I just didn’t want to hold back anymore. If I told you in the dance, I was afraid it’d derail the evening and I wanted to have a serious conversation with you later.  I- I’m sorry,” Katara finished, eyes downcast. 

“Weeell, yeah that sounds about right,” Sokka said, scratching his chin. “Still hurts though.”

“I’m sorry.”

Sokka waved her off. When he spoke up again, his voice was guarded. “What are your plans, then? Will you stay here? Will you marry him? Will you come back? You must realise, Katara, that we don’t have much time on our hands. You’ve said it yourself, this match has huge political implications. Even now, I swear I can hear those idiots from the Earth Kingdom conspiring. I’m speaking as Tribe Chief.”

Katara took a deep breath. “I will come back with you and wrap up my duties as Ambassador to the Southern Water Tribe. I will have to return here sooner rather than later and Zuko and I will see how we feel about each other then. I… don’t want to rush into anything and ruin our relations with the Fire Nation along with the Avatar.”

Sokka snorted. “You do know how to pick them. But to be honest, I don’t see this relationship turning out badly. And I don’t think the Fire Nation will give us a lot of shit either way. I’ve seen the way he looks at you, and the way you look at him. Makes me shudder every time, seriously. He even gave you a  proposal firelilly comb. Which you are happily wearing. Right now. His daughter calls you Mom. Your children consider him a father figure. You already act like a family. What’s more, you hold a position of power in his government. The people respect and like you and the ministers already treat you like Firelady. It hadn’t made sense to me before, but it does now.”

“But that still leaves Aang and everyone else..?”

“Aang’s a grown man now. He’ll just have to suck it up and live with it. And the politics… we have you and Zuko and Suki and Toph. We can manage a few diplomats between us. The tribespeople… they will talk. But you already know that.”

Katara nodded. 

Sokka came up to her, placing both hands on her shoulders. “I am always on your side, Katara. No matter what. We’ll face it together. I’m not going to let some conservative fools blow my sister’s chance at happiness. Now coming back to the topic at hand. Why did Suki and Toph know before me?!”

“Well… with how we were acting, they guessed. And I didn’t want to tell you too soon because you would have made a scene with Zuko,” Katara shrugged.

“Oh, I’m definitely going to make a scene later. He should know what he’s marrying into, don’t you think,” Sokka laughed at her. 

And through the gathering tears, she laughed back, hugging him fiercely. They proceeded to Zuko’s quarters, calling Toph and Suki there as well. He looked like he’d been expecting them, stationery neatly laid out as he sat reading by the lamplight. 

“You good Snoozles?” Toph called out, rummaging through Zuko’s cupboards, presumably for a bottle of wine. 

“Fine, I guess. No biggie. My sister is doing my best friend. Yep, all good. Firewhiskey’s to your right, Toph. Pour me a big one.”

“Hey! That’s my liquor cabinet-” Zuko interrupted.

“Do you, or do you not want my approval to date my sister?” 

“EXCUSE ME-” Katara began.

“Stop. Let’s focus. Toph is not going to be pouring any drinks. Because we are all staying sober for this discussion,” Suki said, matter of factly as Toph groaned. “Now, since this is out in the open, what are you two planning on doing?”

Katara exchanged a look with Zuko. They hadn’t cemented their plans yet, beyond a short talk in the morning, after which they’d gotten… distracted. Zuko covered her hand with his, slight smile on his face. I’m fine with anything that makes you happy , he seemed to say, and Katara melted. 

“TOPH! Where is the alcohol?!” Sokka squealed.

“Stop being such a child, Sokka!” Katara cried out.

Suki just sighed. 

“Back on the topic,” Katara began. “I will leave with Sokka and the Tribe. There are certain pacts with the South regarding construction and development that require my presence there. That will take me from six months upto a year as the projects start. After that, I’ll return here and if Zuko and I still feel the same, we will… we will see,” she finished lamely.

“If you don’t propose marriage by then, Sparky, I will fucking kill you,” Toph interjected.

Zuko snorted. “Six months from now, is it Tara? Eight?”

“Eight.”

Zuko nodded. “Those are our plans. Tara will… leave for eight months, and then return after her business is concluded. I don’t think we can finalise anything concrete like marriage as yet because we don’t know what repercussions we’ll face in the light of our relationship. I believe that the Fire Nation won’t be a hinderance, because, well everyone seems to love her already. The Earth Kingdom and the North will probably band together and wait and watch. What about the Southern Water Tribe?”

“You’ll need to win us over, Firelord.” Sokka replied matter-of-factly. “The general sentiment is that you’re a good person, and with the bilateral agreements we’ve reached this year, we should be good. But you’ll need to win us by other means as well. Show us that you’re reliable. Get creative.”

 Sokka paused and took a deep breath and Katara got the impression that he wasn’t talking about winning over just the Tribe. “I am happy for the two of you. This all seems to be for the best, and I sincerely wish you both happiness, but let me be very clear on one thing. I will not let Katara go through all the shit that she did with Aang. I cannot see her or the kids like that again. You’re my friend and I trust you, Zuko. But you’re on thin fucking ice here.”

“Sokka!” Katara sputtered.

“I love her, Sokka. I will never hurt her. You have my word,” Zuko said firmly from beside her. 

Katara didn’t know whether to be exasperated or happy. Her brother justified this response with a nod, extending his arm across the table. “Just so long as we understand each other.”

Zuko shook the proffered hand. 

“Alright, then. If the misogyny is out of the way, can we discuss how we’re going to run the circus tomorrow?” Suki asked. 

They talked past midnight. The meeting was called to a close by Toph, who proclaimed that her brain would melt if they talked any longer. Sokka and Suki got up to follow her as she marched out. 

“Katara aren’t you-” Sokka began. 

Katara, who’d sidled closer to Zuko inch by inch over the hours, just hid her face in the crook of his neck. 

“Ugh, I can’t believe my sister was your mystery woman, Zuko. Wait, that means the mosquito bite-!” And that was all they got out of him before Suki dragged him out. 

Zuko chuckled, dragging his hand through Katara’s hair as he planted a soft kiss on her forehead. “Eight months? Really? Izumi is going to miss you.”

“Only Izumi?” Katara asked softly.

Zuko hummed. “And Uncle, too I suppose.”

Katara swatted his hand lightly and Zuko chuckled again and placed a light kiss on her forehead.

“I will miss you dreadfully. I might just end up writing to you every day. Maybe twice a day. We’re going to run out of messenger hawks. I am trying to console myself that I lived without you for thirteen years, a few months is nothing, but I can’t. I’ve gotten used to you. I’m afraid without you around, I’ll be reduced to a moping mess.”

“You’ll be fine,” she giggled, kissing him lightly on his neck. 

“Do we have to wait eight months, Tara? Can’t I just marry you right now?” Zuko pouted.

Katara looked up at him and smiled. “I will have to refuse, my love. I need some time to be sure that this is what I really want. I am not going to repeat my mistakes. Besides, it was the distance that did our friendship in last time, let’s see if there’s a difference this time round.”

“Distance and the fact that Aang didn’t let my letters get to you, or yours to me,” Zuko said derisively.

“That too.”

They passed a few minutes in comfortable silence, as the fire crackled on.

“Bumi and Kya are going to miss you. Tenzin too. And so will I. So very much,” Katara said, tipping her head back to kiss him on his lips. 

“This family of ours…”

“Who would have thought, huh?” Katara completed. “But then again, I don’t remember my grandfather. He died before I was born. My grandfather will always be Pakku, the man who married Gran-Gran. And I guess it’s similar with you and Kiyi. We are all entitled to our family, and this may not always be related by blood. And that’s fine too.”

“More than fine. I can’t wait for our next Ember Island Vacation. Let’s call everyone, it will inevitably be chaos and then you and I can slip away,” Zuko said.

“Well we have some time now…” Katara whispered, trailing her nose around the lobe of Zuko’s ear. The next thing she knew, she was up in the air, being carried to the large four poster. 

“Let’s make eight months’ worth of memories,” Zuko whispered, covering her body with his own. 

They didn’t sleep until much later.



Notes:

I have nothing to say, except that I am so so sorry for the delay. This chapter is 5 months in the making, but then life happened. I don't want to post something that I'm not happy with, because this fic means a lot to me and deserves a good ending. That being said, I have gone over this chapter more times than I can count over these last few months in the hopes of finishing it, and I cannot tell for the life of me, if it's good or bad.
"My heart burns for you"- Chibi Zuko to Chibi Katara in CANON. Watch the videos on Youtube if you haven't already.
About Katara's decision- it makes full sense to me. She needs to see if the attraction will wane with time and distance, and doesn't want to rush. Spoiler alert: it won't wane. This love story's one for the history books, folks.
Izumi- I have had a lot of people asking me about the moment Izumi calls Katara 'Mom', and I hope I did it justice.

I have a big exam in a day's time, but I've kind of given up at this point tbh. Let see what happens. I just really wanted to update.

Chapter 24: Confrontation - Part 1

Notes:

I don't know if anyone is still following this work of mine, but I am determined to finish it ! It's difficult for me to write these days, and I'm still not hundred percent pleased with this chapter. But this is as good as it will get. There's some real steamy stuff in the latter half, just saying. I hope it will compensate for the prolonged waiting period in between chapters.
This chapter and possibly the next few will be un-betaed, so please forgive my mistakes🥲 I'm sure I'll re-read this in a few months' time and cringe internally.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Morning dawned, and yet again Katara found herself in the too warm embrace of a firebender. He ran warm and it would have been uncomfortable for anyone else, but she was always someone who was on the cooler side and she loved it. The sun was rising over the edges of the crater outside and Zuko looked like he was ringed by a golden halo. She smiled lazily, pressing her lips to his.

“Good morning, Firelord.”

“Good morning, waterbender.”

Katara beamed at that and snuggled further into him.

“I suppose today is the day I die?” he asked, playing with her hair.

This jolted Katara up. “Huh?!”

He answered drily, “Appa has been spotted in the distance,” he explained. And Katara’s shoulders relaxed. Zuko continued, “Your ex-husband’s coming to kill me. Though… dying in the arms of the woman I love doesn’t sound so bad,” he mused.

 Katara giggled. “I’ll protect you, my love,” she said, nuzzling into his embrace.

“But then you’d get hurt,” he whined, tightening his arms around her.

“Hmm… unlikely. Though, he’s burned me before, it’s nothing I can’t heal,” she answered with a yawn.

WHAT?!”

Zuko’s expression had morphed from placid to outrageously angry within a second. He half-rose from bed, sheets sliding off his sculpted torso so that the lightning scar came into view. Katara, still very much in the clutches of sleep. However, her arms were empty again and she missed him already so she tried to pull him down.

“Right then,” Zuko continued stroppily, “My death is cancelled, today is the day the Avatar dies.” And he tried to get out of bed.

“Mhhm.. stay,” Katara whispered, holding onto his hand. “No fighting. T’was a long time ago when he was just learning. He got much better later.”

“That does not make it better!! I did not burn anyone while training! He should not have tried fire at all if he couldn’t control it! Why was he even near you? That little shit, I swear…”

“It’s fine, Zuko, it’s fine. It was a slight burn, didn’t really hurt me too much,” Katara lied.

“You’re lying,” he seethed.

“Zuko…” she groaned, pulling at his hand. “Let it go, it was nearly two decades ago. Please?”

At this, Zuko settled back in, still looking quite cross, muttering under his breath. Katara giggled, leaning over to kiss one of the blooming purple spots on his neck. There were quite a few now. “Call for breakfast in bed please?” she asked sweetly. “Let’s take a bath together. There are better ways to use our time than thinking about the past.”

This distracted him sufficiently, especially when she let the covers slide enough to expose her torso.  As Katara made her way to the adjoining bath, she could hear him nearly slip on the carpets as he followed her.

 

It was a little later that she made her way to the guesthouses on the West bank of the river. She could hear loud arguing from the largest one. The men from the Southern Water Tribe were debating her personal life quite hotly from what she could tell. With a deep breath in, she pushed the door open and the room fell quite. Her footsteps could be heard clacking on the stone floor as she took her seat of honour next to Sokka.

“Why stop on my behalf? Do continue,” Katara commanded. “I heard words like treason, war, second marriage and Avatar’s wife.”

There was a lot of awkward shuffling and side-eyeing before Bato’s son spoke out loud, avoiding  her eyes as he did. “Well, we were just worried, Master Katara. About the repercussions.”

“Repercussions?” she asked.

 The man took a deep breath – seeming to gather his courage, and said “We don’t want the Avatar to get angry at us. And the Fire Nation was our enemy until recently, we’re not sure if this is a good idea, and…”

“And?” Katara pushed.

“And a second marriage or seeing other men after marriage with the husband still alive is unheard of in the Tribes, Master Katara,” he said, finally meeting her eyes.

There was pin drop silence when he said this. Someone shuffled their feet at the back of the room.

“Is that all, then?” Katara asked.

“M-more or less,” he answered. There were some more voices, grumbling about it all, but most of them looked on silently. Katara would say that she was fairly good at reading the room. A year ago, when she had broken up with Aang, the tension in a quiet room had felt horrible, stifling. Like no one wanted her there.

Today, she got the impression that more than opposing her for the sake of it, these men wanted to be reassured. They respected her- or at least most of them did – and knew she wouldn’t take a decision which would put the Tribe at risk. The odds looked to be in her favour, but even so, she couldn’t possibly wouldn’t reach all of them. But she could try, Katara thought to herself.

“Thank you for letting me have this conversation with you. Thank you for giving me this stage to explain myself. All I ask is that you listen and try to understand,” she started.

Every eye in the room was on her. Sokka observed the goings on from his seat with a wary eye.

“I’ll start by asking, do you really think the Fire Nation of the past decade is the same one from before Firelord Zuko came into power? You have come here for these meetings every year for more than a decade. Do you really think there is any chance that they will incite war again?”

“They might-” one old advisor said.

“Who knows what they are thinking-” another one said.

“With all due respect, Master Katara you might be biased-”

“I don’t think they will.” Sokka answered loudly and with finality. “I think this is a nation that is tired of war. I have seen them, and they have lost so much as well. The people have been suffering. They are thankful for their new ruler – someone who looks after them and the new peace. I do not think Firelord Zuko wants war. I have seen him work very hard for his people and to protect them from those who wish for war. He has dismantled the entire old system for this. The Fire Nation will not incite another hundred year war. Does anyone disagree?”

Some men were nodding while others stood still. But no one disputed that statement. Especially coming from the respected Tribe Leader. Encouraged, Katara asked further-

“A more simple question perhaps is, do you think the Avatar is a man who will cause war to break out just because of a personal affront? He has long propagated the message of unity and harmony. If he really was someone so fickle that a personal hurt would sway him, he would not be worthy of being worshipped, do you not think?””

Some more shaking of heads. She continued, “So if there is no chance that a war might break out, if we look at things the way they are right now, in the last few years, our economy has seen major growth. We can put this down partly to our relations with the Fire Nation. Trade and commerce have increased and better relations with them will only help us in the long run. The North always allies with the Earth Kingdom, preventing us from trading and growing. If we ally ourselves with the Fire Nation, we only stand to win.”

There was more nodding and the mood was gradually lifting.

“Then what seems to be the issue?” she asked.

One man asked, clearly distraught, “What about the Avatar’s children? How will they accept another man as a – a – father? How will he even treat children who are not his own?!”

This irked Katara a bit. “They are not just the Avatar’s children, they are mine as well. And they love Zuko. And he loves them back. I have seen it. That is a matter of my personal life and I don’t owe you any explanations.”

“I apologise Master, but this is not simply a question of your personal life,” one man interjected hot-headedly. “These people are our enemies. We have fought them!”

Katara resisted the urge to sigh. Then she began, “Since we are all tribespeople here, let me reiterate one of my favourite fables. I suppose you all are familiar with the story of Akna and Aput?” she asked. There was some nods and sounds of affirmation. Katara continued, “They were two young people from tribes across the South, always at war with each other. But because of an oracle, they were married. Their love changed everything and both tribes came together as one to form the Southern Water Tribe leading to a thousand years of peace and prosperity. How is this current situation any different?” she challenged.

“But he is the ruler of the Fire Nation! They killed your mother Master! There is a clear difference!” One of the men cried, wide eyed.

At this, Katara snapped. “I have already confronted the man who killed Mom. And I have moved past it. We can’t point our fingers at the entirety of the Fire Nation and accuse them of killing our loved ones. By that logic, is the serving lady who brought you your food last evening to blame as well? The orphans who are living in poverty? The widows and widowers of war whose partners one of you might have killed? The men and women who committed atrocities in war are already dead. Firelord Zuko made sure of it.”

 There was pin drop silence. She continued, tired. “We were at war then. We are not at war now. Zuko has done his utmost to punish the warmongers. What more do you want, to kill every last Fire Nation citizen in revenge? They are tired as well, I have seen it. And if they can give me, a tribeswoman and their enemy respect, why can’t you do the same?”

There was some more grumbling, but now no one met her eyes.

 “We are not at war right now,” Sokka re-iterated. “What could be more important than forgiving past enemies and building new bonds? The Fire Nation and Southern Water Tribe as you all know, have developed multiple bilateral treaties this past year. We now have many engineers and builders preparing ports that will not freeze in our winters. We have better housing and trade. Stronger relations with the Fire Nation will only serve to benefit us.”

Still one elder interjected. “It is still unheard of, miss. To divorce your husband and find another.”

“Elder,” Katara answered calmly, ignoring how the man had blatantly disregarded her title of Master. “Rules and traditions are made to ensure order and the upkeep of a way of life that ensures happiness of all. But if these start to suffocate those they’re meant to protect, they lose all meaning don’t you think? Just because something hasn’t been done in the recent past doesn’t mean it’s the wrong thing to do. I love Zuko and I trust him. He is not the kind of man who will hurt innocents. And he loves me back. Wouldn’t it be too cruel for two people who love each other to notspend their lives together just because of tradition?”

“But…”

“I am not giving up my culture,” she answered in the same vein. “I am still very much Katara of the Southern Water Tribe. My marriage to a man from another nation will not change that. But then again, the Avatar was also not a man from the Water Tribes, was he.”

There was quite a lot of nodding at this, but some looked unconvinced. Sokka again took the stage. “I believe in Firelord Zuko as well. Not only as a friend, but also as a fellow leader. And does anyone here have any doubts about the respect that Katara of the Southern Water Tribe has been given here in the Fire Nation? The people love her. And I have full faith in her as well. If there is anyone in this room who can prevent the Fire Nation from inciting another war, I believe it is her. He’ll listen to her, he’ll have to.” he grinned roguishly.

“Sokka…” Katara sighed softly.

More people were cheering now, hope lighting up their eyes. Most men looked satisfied. Others were only mumbling amongst themselves. They had witnessed her power against the Northern Water Tribe first-hand the other day, and no one wanted to cross her. 

“Well then, now that that’s settled, can I trust that all of you will behave yourselves in the closing ceremony?” Sokka called out. There was a chorus of yeses. There was still doubt, but nothing that could be voiced presently by those experiencing it.

As they made their way to the closing ceremony, Katara felt even more eyes on her. Fire Nation guards and servants were looking at her. Everywhere they went, heads were bowed lower than they otherwise would have been, and those gazes which she did manage to catch, looked on with respect and admiration. The respect usually given to the Consort of the Firelord. She could see her brother’s chest puff up with pride.

Then they entered the great outdoor courtyard and there were people in green and dark blue and yellow, directing their gazes of curiosity and in some cases of outright hostility. She did not care. Her attention was on the man on the dais - resplendent red robes fluttering in the wind, speaking to a minister with a stern expression on his face. Except, just for a moment when he looked in her eyes and smiled.

Sokka snorted next to her and Katara stifled a giggle as well. Zuko might have thought he was being smooth, but the gesture was caught by nearly everyone in the hall. There was even more disgruntled muttering from the other side of the courtyard.

Once everyone had assembled, the Firelord extended his hand in invitation and Avatar walked out on the dais. Not everyone was close enough to see Aang’s face, but Katara being the Ambassador to the South, could. He looked gaunt and stern. Like he’d rather be anywhere else but here. He never could hide his emotions well, she thought. Even so, he walked up to Zuko and met his eyes. For his part, Zuko’s expression was closed off, but Katara could now tell that he was angry as well. The conversation from this morning was likely playing on his mind.

The crowd held their breath, collectively.

Then, with a forced smile, Aang lifted his hand to firmly grasp Zuko’s. A show of peace and cooperation.

Zuko grasped his hand back with a pasted-on smile. There was a beat of silence.

Then everyone in the hall seemed to let go a sigh of relief.

Katara felt her shoulders relax, and realised that she’d been more worried than she cared to admit.

Zuko came forward to give his speech. “Thank you all for attending the 12th Four Nations Conference. It has been the Fire Nation’s great honour to host it this year. The goal as always was to build bridges, help each other and ensure a new era of peace and prosperity for the next generation. I am hopeful that we are now one step closer to that goal this year and we will be another step closer with the next year. And now, without further ado, the Avatar!

Here, Zuko turned towards Aang with a nod. Aang stepped forward, back straight and eyes solemn. “The greatest illusion in the world is the illusion of separation. I was taught this at a young age. We are one. One people even though we think we are divided by nationality or bending. It is only right that we love and help one another. We have to let go of the past into a new world and the key is kindness and cooperation, of which we have seen excellent examples. With this, I will now bring to an end the conference for this year and I hope to see you all in Ba Sing Se in the next.

With that, he flicked his wrist and dimmed the ceremonial lamp to signal the closing of the ceremony as per Fire Nation tradition. Round after round of applause ensued. Katara had to give it to him, the speech was a good one. She looked around and saw joy on faces. And relief.

Of course, the team had all prepared for the worst the previous night. If any of the nations (or the Avatar) had taken offence and insulted the Fire Nation’s hospitality, the latter would not have taken it lightly. They were a proud people. One thing would likely have led to another, and taking into account the border skirmishes with the Earth Kingdom colonies, and there would have definitely have been violence and a chance of a war if the situation continued to escalate. Toph and Suki had been assigned roles, Katara, Sokka and Zuko as well to halt such a thing before it took place. But it seemed there had been no need. Even in times of peace, it seemed the people had not yet forgotten the horrors of war. The Northern Water Tribe had not played up, the Earth Kingdom situation had been managed by Toph and Suki and the Avatar himself had acted with utmost maturity and grace.

People started to break formation then, to talk, to embrace and to partake in the food and wine that had miraculously appeared. Katara walked away as well, in Aang’s direction. She needed to talk to him. To bring to a conclusion everything that had gone on between them. For closure which they both needed. However, just as she reached the dais, he sensed her intentions and fled. Perhaps it had all been a bit much for him that day.

“Let him go,” Toph muttered from next to her. “He’s had a tough time, he’ll likely listen tomorrow.”

Katara nodded, and reaching for a flute of sparkling cherry wine, went back to Sokka instead.

 

Katara did not have a chance to talk to Aang the entire day. He had literally disappeared in a puff of smoke. However, as soon as it became evening, she gave up and nearly ran to the interiors of the Palace. She and Zuko through unspoken agreement, had promised to spend every possible moment with each other before the moment of departure. And sure enough, there he was in his chambers, trying to pull out his headpiece without success.

She softly calmed him down, untangling his hair and pulling the offending object out. Zuko looked tired. “It’s okay now, we did it,” she whispered.

He nodded and pulled her close, burrowing his face in her neck as his hair cascaded around them like a protective curtain. As his scent enveloped them both, Katara sighed softly.

“I could do with a distraction,” she murmured. “I’m tired.”

“What sort of distraction?” Zuko asked her softly.

Katara pulled him down by his clothes into a kiss, deep and bruising. There was tongue and teeth and soon he was gripping her tightly as well. She had just managed to undo the outer fastenings of his robes when there was knocking on the door.

“My lord, we need your help,” a voice called.

Katara disengaged, leaving Zuko chasing after her.

“Go on then,” she whispered.

Zuko gave a strangled grunt. Then, raising his head said, “Go to the bathhouse and wait for me. I’ll sort this quickly.”

 

Finding the royal bathhouse was easy enough. She just had to ask the servants, and with her relationship with the Firelord out in the open, they were all too happy to point her in the right direction.

The bathhouse was full of steam, make it difficult to see. She bent it away to see a large clear pool of water ringed by rocks. There were petals of rosebloom floating on it, emanating a slight fragrance. An assortment of bathing products were arranged along with towels to the side. There were mirrors as well, quite a few of them along the walls. She disrobed, observing her figure in the mirrors as she did so.

She definitely did not look like she did when she was younger.

3 children later, her body was rounder – her breasts and hips more pronounced and stretch marks still faintly visible on her abdomen. Though she was pleased to see that she still had a flat tummy and pronounced abs with all the bending that she did. Satisfied with her appearance, she cautiously slipped in the aquamarine pool.

It was just the right temperature. Warm and relaxing, she could feel her stress and tiredness melt away. The bath salts helped, and soon she was floating in the centre, spread eagled among the rose petals, occasionally bending little rivulets and waves along her pressure points. She did not feel the time passing.

“Enjoying yourself, waterbender?” A deep voice called out.

She startled and righted herself instantly. There stood Zuko at the edge of the bath, towel hanging low around his lower body as he looked down at her with a smirk. He looked the picture of ease, but his eyes were smouldering. Katara gulped.

“I could get used to this,” she managed to speak out, completely distracted by the pronounced abdominal muscles on his body which dipped sharply into the region covered by cloth.

Zuko might have noticed, because he casually untied the towel, letting it drop down as his full form came into view, and Katara noticed that he was already half hard. Then, as though he was a waterbender himself, he dropped into the water and swam up to her much faster than she expected, enclosing her in his warm embrace, herding her towards the edge of the pool.

“Zuko- what? Where-”

“Shhh,” was the only response she got, as he pressed into her from behind. She felt his warm breath on her neck as he bent down to nip at it. She moaned. And he dug in harder.

“I thought I was going to be patient with you today, you know. I’d promised myself. I wanted to take my time, so you’re sufficiently… distracted,” Zuko’s deep voice rumbled through her being.


“You shouldn’t break your promises, Firelord,” she whispered back as she tried to turn to face him. He didn’t allow this.

“Like this. Stay like this,” he said. He groped at her breast with one hand, playing with her nipple as he did so. She closed her eyes, leaning back into him as his dick dug into her, harder than before. He pulled her right breast back towards him and bit her nipple.

“Fuck, you can even suck it from behind,” he rasped, devotedly sucking and fondling her breasts. His tongue swirled around her nipple, sucking on it like candy and Katara could feel herself get wetter. His other hand found its way to her clitoris down below and she moaned even louder than before, completely lost in the sensations.

“Ugh, Zuko… stop, I’m gonna…”

He then let go of her and she nearly complained, but the next moment, she was up in the air and being placed on the ledge of the pool, facing him. Her legs were spread apart and before she could make out the flash of gold in his eyes, there was a tongue between her thighs, licking at her core, lapping up all that she gave him, like no tomorrow.

“Zuko…” she said breathily and he pressed his tongue inward, rubbing firmly against her bud. He knew how she liked it now, and was relentless.

Katara tried to close her legs, bucking under the sensations, but he held them apart, nipping her inner thigh softly in punishment before returning his focus to her most sensitive spot.

“Can’t get enough of you,” he managed in between soft licks and then he sucked at her, hard. She let out a keening moan.

It was a sight to behold, she decided. Her lover between her legs, kissing her lower lips like he was drunk on the scent.

She looked up for a second and saw herself reflected in the mirror across from her - her legs spread apart and a dark head between them. Her expression was rapturous, breasts swinging wildly and just then, he sucked hard on her clit again. The way he had earlier, and she gave way.

Her body tensed and she shuddered, her head tipped back.

When the wave passed, she looked back up, curious to see what she looked like in the mirror. She was still dazed and hadn’t noticed his dark gaze on her. And by the time she could avert her eyes, it was too late.

He smirked, pulling himself out of the water too. He nibbled at her ear lobes, propping both of them up to face the mirror.

“Would you like to see yourself get fucked, Tara?” he asked her breathily, warm breath arousing her even further.

“No, Zuko…” she whispered, breath hitching.

“I think you would, “ he answered as he stood behind her and propped up her left leg over his arm. In the mirror, she could see all of herself, body covered in blooming bites, blue eyes brimming over with lust and her nether regions still glistening from when she’d come earlier.

She supported herself by holding on to a nearby rock with her hands. “This… this is too indecent,” she blushed, closing her eyes out of embarrassment.

His warm breath tickled her again as he stroked her back and then her tummy, moving down to play with her clitoris again. And then, before she could gasp anything more out, he was plunging inside her. She was ready, but the intrusion shocked her and she let out a gasp, eyes flicking open.

“Open your eyes, my love. You look so beautiful when you’re cumming,” he ordered.

Katara could only nod as he pulled out, only to ram back in again with a growl. And then, he was thrusting into her mercilessly, as she held on for dear life. His eyes were on hers in the mirror, admiring her body as his hands held her close. She could feel his heavy puffs of breath on her neck, tickling her.

“Fuck.. fuck this is hot,” he grunted as he continued thrusting. “Look at how well you’re taking my dick, princess. Look at how you’re just tightening around me. So lewd. So fucking hot.”

Katara could only groan as he rammed into her once again. And again. There was no mercy in his thrusts as he went hard and fast. She could barely catch her breath.

“Look, feel how we’re joined Tara,” he ordered and pulled her hand down to feel where his cock entered her body as he panted behind her. His thrusts stilling  as he felt her smaller hand touch his dick near where it was entering her.

“Yes, yes.. harder Zuko,” she moaned, giving up all pretence of coyness. “Harder, please…”

He complied, pulling out and driving into her with more force than earlier, and soon, his thrusts became erratic, both of them lost in the feeling of it all. She looked up at the mirror and saw dark hair plastered to his forehead, golden eyes focused on her with his eyebrows scrunched in concentration.

“Cum with me, Tara” he whispered, one hand playing with her clit as the other still supported her leg which he held propped up. And then he was spilling into her with a strangled grown, his seed hot and warm, filling her up completely.

“Zuko!!!” Katara moaned out and followed, the sensation tipping her over into another orgasm. And then their movements stilled, ragged breaths coming to a halt. They stood still for a minute, and the roaring in her ears gradually settled. He slipped out of her finally, peppering her back with kisses. And only then did he allow her to turn around.

They held each other for a while as heart beats slowed and breathing settled, before Zuko reached for soap and a rag and sat her down. He started washing her gently, avoiding her eyes at first, a small blush on his cheeks.

“I’m sorry, I might have gone overboard,” he whispered eventually.

She bit her lip. “If that’s the case, then you need to go overboard all the time,” Katara whispered back, blushing. “Sex with you is fantastic. Every time. I didn’t even know it could be this way.”

Zuko visibly puffed up in pride and she kissed him on his scarred cheek with a smile. “I can’t believe I have to make do without this for nearly a year,” she groaned.

“I’ll write to you,” he said as he cleaned between her legs. “I’ll detail exactly how I jerked off to thoughts of you, three times a day.”

Katara blushed at the thought. “You’re keying me up again,” she complained. “Don’t do that if you can’t follow through.”

And then he was getting up, pulling her closer to him again. He bit her ear lightly, asking, “You should know better by now. Who says I can’t follow through?”

It was much later that they managed to slip out of the bathhouse. Zuko’s bed was soft and warm as they both fell asleep as soon as they fell in.

Katara woke up before him the next day. She took a moment to appreciate her firebender's sleeping face. But there was a lot to be done, so she gave him a quick peck on the cheek and got out of bed, ignoring his half-asleep grumbling. She gathered her things and slid out of the room to head to her own. The guards along the passageway were all used to her, and her maid would be waiting out with clothes and her daily agenda.

But that day, the sight outside was anything but pleasant. The guards shuffled their feet and the maid looked awkward, averting her eyes as next to her, a tall man leaned against a pillar with his arms crossed in front of him.

“Aang,” Katara said.

Notes:

The Aang confrontation was supposed to be one chapter, but it wasn't feeling right, so I've split it. Good news is, this means around one-third of the next chapter is already written.

I've tried to answer some of the arguments against Zutara in this chapter. I focused primarily on the SWT and Katara's side because I believe that over the course of the months, the Fire Nation has come around to the idea of her as their ruler's consort. They have seen the good she has done for them and love her for it. They are also not held back by the tribes' conservative way of thinking.

Hope you all enjoyed the smut! I got wine drunk, read some porn and typed for the better part of an hour. idk if it was not your cup of tea. To you all, I'm just someone on the internet anyway, heh - you can't judge me too much.

I have not read anyone's comments in the past few months out of sheer guilt for not posting. I apologise. I will do so over this coming week. But hypocrite that I am, I would appreciate more comments anyway. I will target posting the next chapter in 2 weeks' time. Let's see.

Chapter 25: Confrontation Part II

Notes:

High octane drama Katara v/s Aang incoming!
Bit of spillover from the previous chapter, I'd written around 3/4ths previously, hence early update. Again, not beta'd. And written and edited every spare moment I got between 12 hour shifts lol. Your comments are my fuel guys. I re-read them all so many times.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

“Aang,” she said.

All of a sudden, she was face to face with her past again. There he stood, orange robes resplendent, his wooden necklace in place around his neck and deep, dark circles under his eyes. He looked miserable as his scowl got deeper and the Fire Nation guards at the entrance of the Fire Lord’s chambers looked distinctly uncomfortable.

“Figured I’d find you here. We need to talk, Katara,” was his only answer.

“We do,” she agreed, refusing to be ruffled by his presence outside her new lover’s bedroom. “Follow me.”

He nodded, and she led him to one of the meeting rooms to the side. They were part of the wing used for Zuko’s personal use, but she knew he wouldn’t mind.

The door shut behind them, enclosing them both in a large office with its oak desk and then, for the longest time, they were both quiet as they stood apart, each looking in different directions.

Katara had imagined what she’d say to him a billion times over, but now words failed her. She looked at him, and she could tell he was struggling too. And then, just as she had gathered enough words to speak, he spoke up,

“Did you ever love me?”

His voice was tremulous and so very sad that Katara faltered and fumbled. He at that moment looked exactly 12 years old. A child hatched out of an iceberg.

There was a sudden rush of memories. Years’ worth of memories. The war, the travelling, three children and a life semi-built together. There had been good times too – lazy mornings and happy outings and holding each other on Appa. She felt a sudden stab of guilt. This was her ages old friend. Was she truly out of her mind?

But then she remembered the not so rosy parts. The way he was never there when she needed him. The way he took her care and kindness for granted. The way he never seemed to understand or even tried to understand her struggles. And the way he treated their children.

She’d faltered too long, and Aang’s expression seemed to fall further.

“That’s answer enough-” he started sullenly.

“I did, Aang.”

He startled when he heard that.

“I did love you once upon a time. I thought you were my destiny,” she said.

He thought over it for a while, then he asked very calmly but with an undertone of anger, “That changed, didn’t it?”

“Yeah, I guess it did,” she replied simply, looking away.

“I fucked it up.” He said, again, in the same monotone. “… And so did you.”

Katara whipped her head up sharply at this. It was not like him to swear.

“Do you love him now? The same way you did me?” he scoffed. “Barely a year and you’re already striding out of his bedroom first thing in the morning.”

Katara brought her arms up and around herself protectively. “I’m not doing this to spite you. We do really love each other and… it is not the same way as it was for you.”

“Oh, it was different, was it? Do tell!” he scoffed at her.

Katara took a deep breath in. “I did love you once. It was a soft pink baby love. A… a teenager’s crush. And I think that’s how it was for you as well-”

“Don’t you try to put a name to MY feelings!” he shouted at her.

“Think about it, Aang! You were infatuated with me! You still are!” She argued back. “ You kept calling me perfect, you kept calling me your forever girl… and I’M NOT! I’m not the perfect girl you think I am. You are in love with a model Katara, who never existed.”

“Isn’t a husband supposed to idolise his wife? It’s called love, Katara. Look it up.”

“It’s not love! You never saw me – my insecurities, my sadness! You just brushed it under the rug! I was only always perfect wife Katara who understood everything! We fought so many times, and you – you never understood, never changed for me.”

“You kept telling me I never saw you Katara, but you did not show me this side of yourself either!! You were fine for the first ten or so years we were together and all of a sudden, one day you started fighting with me. Don’t you see the concessions I made for you? I didn’t make you stay if the Air Temple or travel with me-”

“MAKE ME?! MAKE ME! How were you planning on making me do something I hated with all my heart?! I can’t move around in the air temple because I’m not an airbender. Your stupid accolytes – your little fanclub judged and hated me and I hated them. And I don’t have nomadic tendencies! The water tribes value family and I want to stay with mine! I want to stay with a husband who values family and my children!”

 Aang was silent for a moment.

“I am slowly building my heritage back up, I’m sorry that you didn’t like the accolytes –

Katara groaned.

“But I can’t just get rid of them. And I am a nomad and the Avatar, so how can I not travel?” he asked, anger clearly etched on every line of his face.

Katara sighed. “We were not meant to last, Aang. We don’t suit each other. We want different things in life. I’m sorry that I realised this so late.” She said, resignedly.

“That’s easy for you to say isn’t it,” he said. Then shaking his head, he asked her, “Do you remember when we danced together in the cave?”

She looked at him sharply and nodded. Where is he going with this?

“I fell in love with you then. Actually, I feel like I have been in love with you the moment I looked into your eyes. Your blue, blue eyes, the moment you broke me out of the iceberg.”

He paused.

“You’ve been my home Katara. You are my home,” he said, finally voice breaking up.

He was crying. Aang was crying. Crying. Katara was frozen in shock and guilt as moisture dripped out of his eyes.

Katara thought that at one point in time, many years ago, the sight of those big gray eyes nearing tears would have moved her endlessly. Now, she just looked on.

“Was I?” She asked softly. “Was I really? If I were, why did you not stay home more often? With me? Why did you not love all your children?” Katara asked, quietly. “You say I’m your home, but you ignored all the signs that told you I was breaking. That our marriage was falling apart. You closed your eyes, shut your ears and hoped that sweet and perfect Katara would stay put. And why wouldn’t I? I had done that for 13 years.”

Katara took a deep breath in. “Well, never mind. We keep going in circles. I swear we’ve had this exact fight at least forty times.”

“I did not think anything of that sort.” Aang said, replying to her earlier statement. “I was busy, hence I couldn’t come as often as I wanted.” Aang said obstinately,  but looking into her eyes, his gaze wavered and his tears dried. He looked away. And then there was silence.

“And never during winter. You never came during winter. A time when a family needs to stay together in the poles.” Katara supplemented.

“I can’t-”

“Yes, yes. You can’t wear furs and you can’t regulate your temperature all the time,” she replied.

“Sweety-” he pleaded.

Don’t ‘sweety’ me!! I am not your sweety!”

Aang gulped, but she went on. “Now let’s talk about the blatant disrespect for my culture. Yours is all good and right, but you wouldn’t participate or even let Tenzin participate in mine. I hated it, Aang! He’s my son as well!? Shouldn’t our children be the best of both of us? Both our cultures? Instead, one is only air and the other two which you don’t seem to care about are water?”

“I do care about them!” he screamed. “And I respect your culture!”

“Well you have a funny way of showing it!” she screamed back.

“Ugh,” he said, holding his head in his hands. “We had problems. But so what?! Sokka and Suki have problems. Everyone has problems. We could have worked through them. We still can!” he cried desperately.

She was quiet for a moment. Then,

“What were our problems, Aang?” she asked gently.

“I – you… I mean,” he faltered. Then sighed. “You didn’t like that I only paid attention to Tenzin. Despite the fact that I told you many, many times that I had to train him and-”

“Exactly.” Katara cut him off. “I had to train Kya too, doesn’t mean I neglected the other two!  You broke their hearts, Aang. You failed them as a father. My children are more important to me than my life and it drove me absolutely madthat you were just never there for them! Now what are you going to do? Bumi and Kya have replaced you with Zuko in their lives. It’s good isn’t it? Now you won’t have to spend too much time with them at all!” she snapped.

Aang paled at this. “Don’t say that sweety, they are my children too after all!”

Katara felt murderous rage in that instance, such that she had almost never felt before. The temperature in the room dropped to freezing and she could feel the power of water reverberating through her even through the heat of the morning sun.

“I have a partner, Avatar. You are being extremely inappropriate.”

Aang stilled at this, half settling into a bending pose himself on reflex. He probably felt her murderous intent.

“Fine. Point taken,” Aang said finally, gesturing as though he was trying to calm an angry bull-rhino down. “I will spend more time with them. I promise.”

“No Aang. You are not going to do this for my sake. Do it for theirs, and yours. Do it because you want to spend time with them and no other reason. Also, you have promised numerous times in the past. I have no reason to believe that you will follow through. Except this time, I’ll say that if you don’t, they will be lost to you maybe forever.”

But before he could continue, she asked again.

“And tell me more, what were our problems?”

“I’m not sure, Katara! I’m not sure! You tell me!” he cried.

“I was unhappy because I was always The Avatar’s Wife. I had no role apart from supporting you. Which might have been fine for someone else, but I am ambitious, Aang. In case you haven’t noticed. I want to achieve things and make change happen. I want to have a larger purpose and I’d want my partner to support me in it.”

“Well you refused to travel-”

“No, Aang. Try to listen. I refused to become a nomad like you. I might have given in and adapted had you adapted to some of my customs. You were never there in winter. You haven’t done any of the things that fathers from our tribe do with their pups. We don’t condone living in the same housing with numerous unmarried women post marriage, but you had your acolytes. By Tui and La, I despised them. These are seemingly minor things and I’m sure you were busy, but it counts, Aang. All these smaller things add up. Also, think this through. If I’d travelled with you all the time, who’d have taken care of the children? Also, I would have no role other than being your shadow. You will find someone who is happy being just this, but it’s not going to be me.”

Aang was silent for a while, still digesting her words.

“You think I will replace you immediately, just like you did me?” he asked finally, seething. “Do you think he is better then? The better man? Barely a year and you’re already walking out of his chambers early hours of the morning.”

Katara was partially shocked and embarrassed at this. Then realised that he hadn’t said anything untrue. She thought it over for a moment. Finally, she managed to say,

“I love him. In perhaps a different way than I’ve loved you, Aang,” she said softly. It was dawning on her just then too as she put words to her thoughts. “With you, it was a different love. The kind which is cute, especially attractive in the beginning, but can’t stay strong for too long.

“With him …” She took a deep breath. “I know this is it. It’s the real thing. With him, it’s like it’s red. A deep red. I know we will have our fights and there will be bad days. I know we have an uphill task with convincing our countries of our loyalty and our feelings, but if it’s him… I’m happy. I will fight any battle, any bad day. Come what may. He- he took lightning for me, Aang. Leaving everything behind. Perhaps I should have known then…” she said, miserably.

“You should’ve! Would have saved us all the trouble,” Aang replied, laughing mirthlessly. “So you’ve loved him all this while?” he asked, a bit of madness in his eyes.

 Katara, on reflex got prepared for the Avatar state. She’d always had to be careful not to anger him too much. Although now he had it under much better control, the memories of when he didn’t, never left her.

Calming herself down, she answered honestly, “I don’t know. He’s been on my mind, perhaps since Ba Sing Se. Especially since that summer… but before you ask, nothing happened between us then or later, when we were together. He’s only been a good friend up until a few months back.”

“That’s the better man according to you, isn’t it? The guy who kidnapped you and almost killed all of us multiple times.”

“You know better than that Aang. Don’t be ridiculous. He’s a good man,” she replied. “And, it’s not about who’s better or worse. How would I know? I only know that I love him. And that I don’t love you anymore.”

His eyes widened at that, and there was silence. Katara wanted to look away, to hide herself, but she forced herself to look at him – to look in his eyes and watch out for tears or anger.

Aang had sat down. He looked like he’d been slapped. There was quiet for the longest time. He wasn’t crying. Perhaps he’d realised that she wouldn’t run to comfort him like every other time. He just sat still and looked out the large windows, wind ruffling his clothes.

Katara turned to bring out a jug of water and two glasses from the cabinet. When she had turned back, there were tears falling from his eyes.

She didn’t cry. She couldn’t. She couldn’t give in, she had to be strong.  Softly, she said, “Look. Sorry for being so blunt about it. We had our time. We gave our relationship a chance. I did love you. But… I don’t anymore. Not in that way.”

Aang wiped his eyes. They both sat quietly for a while. Each immersed in their own thoughts. It felt like ages passed. The sun seemed to climb higher and the room got brighter. The sounds of the palace floated in from outside. The maids’ kids were playing tag downstairs. It was a bright day. Katara thought she could hear Zuko’s footfall outside the room. She wanted to run to him, away from this hopeless situation. Anyway, it didn’t seem like there was any end to the argument.

“Aang-” Katara started.

“No, wait. I’m thinking,” he replied. He drank his glass of water. Then he poured himself a second and began sipping it pensively. He was quiet again. Katara fidgeted. The wind blew in from the open window, carrying with it a single fire lily. Katara picked it up to tuck it in her hair. To occupy herself, she looked around the walls, making noted of the books and paintings. Then all of a sudden,

“It wasn’t all my fault, Katara,” he said quietly. Katara looked at him, slightly confused.

“You were never this vocal in the beginning and I’m not a mind reader. You should have been upfront with me from the very start. About what you liked and what you wanted. Not when things got so bad that you just couldn’t cope. I understand that I was block headed about the issue with the kids, but I did not know about the other things.”

“Aang, I’m sure I-”

“Yeah, you mentioned it, but I’m a bit slow you see. I didn't know about the acolytes. I didn't know that you didn't like being called only the Avatar's wife and nothing else. I did not get it. And you gave up on us. Or maybe you always had someone else in your mind anyway.”

“That’s not true, Aang. I never cheated on you. Never. I gave it my all. You are the father of my children after all. We argued so often, and I tried to explain and make it work. You know this.”

“Maybe.” he said resignedly. “But you know something, Katara. You’re right about one thing. I don’t recognize you these days. The girl I fell in love with has disappeared. Or maybe you’re right. She never really existed. Did I really make up that version of you in my head, do you think?”

Katara looked down. “It was nice to be that girl for a while, I’m not going to lie. It was nice to be perfect in somebody’s eyes. But it was also so lonely.”

Aang smiled humourlessly. “You’ve always been the strong one. Well, time for me to step up too. To be honest, when I came searching for you today, I had this whole mature speech prepared. Very adult of me, I know. You’d be proud. But the moment I saw you walking out of his room. Even though I knew you’d be there, I lost my mind a little bit. But I guess it was for the good. Everything is out in the open now, isn't it.

Here he paused, and Katara waited for him to continue. 

“I wanted to says that I know I’ve been a bad father. I want to change and improve. Really, I do. I will have to think about everything else you’ve said. I can’t say I agree with you, but it’s what you feel. I for my part, wanted my partner to travel with me. There are no formal wedding customs in the Air Nomads, but I did it for you …”

He appeared lost in thought again.

“Ughh nothing really worked for us did it. I thought I was compromising for you all this while. We just… weren’t meant to be. I can’t adapt to your culture. And you can’t adapt to mine. Or maybe we just didn’t love each other enough to change.”

Katara looked shocked.

He laughed. “Don’t look so surprised. Toph knocked a lot of sense into me the last couple days. She’s going to be so angry when she finds out it all went to waste and I argued with you again.”

“I thought I gave you a good life as the Avatar’s wife. Gave you the peace you wished for and a quiet life in your tribe. Again, you’re right. I never really saw you, never understood you, saw only what I wanted to see.”

“Aang…” Katara began, moving towards him. She was surprised and a bit sad. He had done something right on his part, even if it was misguided. He had thought of her. He had tried. And even though he still didn't fully get what she was trying to say, he was making an attempt at understanding.

In that moment, for the first time in a long time since she’d known him, she felt seen.

“Well then, this is it, isn’t it?” he asked, looking into her eyes. He looked tired, and she felt the same. It was like turning the last page of a book that had kept her busy the last many years. And no matter what her thoughts on it were, she couldn’t go back. This was truly the end. She felt tears in her eyes as well.

“We had a good few years. You’ve been a good friend to me, Katara.”

“You have been a good friend too, Aang. I’m so happy to have met you,” she said, voice breaking.

“Do you regret any of it?” he asked, a dewy smile on his face.

“No.” She replied, surprising herself. There were trials and tribulations, but she had become a stronger better person because of them. She had three children who she would not exchange for anything in the world. And a new relationship and purpose in life which she might not have discovered otherwise. “I don’t.”

“Neither do I. No love is ever wasted, eh? It’s what my mentor always said. I hope there will come a day when we’re comfortable being in the same room together, Katara,” he said quietly, gripping the beads around his neck as he did. His eyes still belied a wealth of emotion, but he didn’t let it spill over. Perhaps because he realised that it would only burden her.

Katara nodded. “I wish you luck, my friend. And… I’m sorry. For how it all ended.”

Aang nodded. “Well then, I’m off. I’ve done all the formal stuff. Toph knows how to find me. Let… let Zuko and the rest know,” he said, clutching his glider tightly. “I will think about everything you’ve said. You’ll hear from me. Soon. Or not.”

He then propped the glider open, and was soaring off before she knew it. Having lost the power in her legs, she crumbled to the floor. It was only much later that she pressed her hands to the cool stone floor, bringing her back to her senses. And she propped herself up.

She headed straight to where her kids would be. The guards’ heads turned in surprise as a figure in blue barrelled down the hallways. There they were, playing in her room. Bumi saw her first – the expression on her face and her general state - and as she opened her arms, he leapt into them. Kya and Tenzin followed immediately. Izumi hesitated a bit by the side lines, but she joined as well. And then, entangled in that many armed hug, Katara finally allowed herself to weep, one last time.

And watching their mother cry, the children cried too. There was no reason for it.

Bumi tried to wipe of his tears and be a man. “Stop crying, stop crying!” he tried to tell himself. The rest just clutched at her waist and robes. “Why’re we crying, Mom?” Kya seemed to ask. Katara just shook her head.

“Nothing my pups, I just want to tell you that I love you all.”

At this, there were more tears.

Feeling a gaze on her back, she looked up and he was standing there. Leaning against the doorframe. Single eyebrow scrunched in worry.

She got up, slowly unentangling herself from the children and walked to him, wiping her face clean as she did.

“I’ve said my goodbyes,” she informed him. Turning around, she told the kids.

“Your father has left. I’ve just seen him off.”

Bumi, Kya and Tenzin nodded. “He said bye to us as well,” Bumi said, a conflicted expression on his face.

“That’s good,” Katara said, relieved. Then she turned back around to face Zuko.

“How did it go?” he asked. He looked nervous, as though still worried that she might slip out of his grasp and back to Aang. With his thumb, he wiped off the single teardrop clinging to her lashes.

“It was okay,” she replied, smiling wanly. “We fought, we both cried, he left. But he understood in the end. And I understood him. He was good today. I feel like we may still be friends later, if we try really hard.”

Zuko smiled and pulled her close. I’m glad. I was sure it went well. You were in there for ages. But now you look better.”

“I feel better. Lighter, somehow,” she said, as a laugh burst out against all odds. He just gripped her tighter and she inhaled his scent, leaning her head on his chest. Her miraculous cure against all maladies- and truly, she immediately felt better.

“Okay, okay, Dadko, stop monopolizing Mom, you’re giving us all the oogies” Bumi said pointedly from behind them.

“Ooh, look who’s become all fancy, using big words,” Kya giggled.

“Let them be, Bumi,” Izumi called out.

“I would have! But I’m hungry!!” Bumi cried. And right on cue, his stomach rumbled, loudly.

“Well then. Come on. Let’s have lunch. Table should be set,” Katara said, giggling, as she disengaged from Zuko.

“Okay!” four voices exclaimed.

 Izumi ran up to grab her hand, rubbing away her tears with the other, while Tenzin took the other one with both of his small hands. Bumi and Kya raced for the dining room with Zuko jogging behind them to barely catch the expensive jug they almost toppled over.

Katara let out a laugh. All would be well.

Notes:

PS: "It's called love, Katara. Look it up," is my new favourite dialogue 😂
PPS: Red by Taylor Swift plays faaaintly in the background
PPPS: I'm highkey worried about what your thoughts are for this chapter. Pressing that post button was scary. For me - I wanted to give them closure and peace. That's the way forward I think. But if you don't agree, pls be nice about it! I wrote another version where Aang just fights and leaves, without even partially coming to terms with everything and it just left a bad taste in my mouth. And also, honestly - the whole thing: relationship, break up - was not just Aang's fault. There are two people in any relationship. So far, we have only seen Katara's side, as she is the narrator. It's like listening to a friend's story about their ex. Even though you know and agree that the other party is mostly at fault, your friend can't be wholly right either. No one is perfect, after all.
PPPPS: I hope I've made a good case regarding who is better for Katara. Aang does not see her rage and her imperfections like in the Southern Raiders episode. Zuko sees it and supports her, helping her process her feelings.

Chapter 26: A moment in time

Notes:

This was supposed to be released with the next chapter on Christmas Day. But things rarely go to plan, so here we go. The next one is in the works. Happy Holidays!

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The next few days passed in a blur and soon enough, bags were packed and sent out ahead to stow in their ship cabins. It was nearly time to leave the Fire Nation and call an end to their prolonged adventure. To think, Katara had envisioned them staying here only a couple months at most.

Toph had left the Caldera first. She had loudly demanded being called to The Wedding. Katara had rolled her eyes, but she’d noted that though her friend appeared to be grinning the whole time, she looked slightly worried. Toph was the only one who knew of Aang and his whereabouts and Katara assumed that she was keeping tabs on him. She could only hope that he was safe and warm, wherever he was.

Tenzin had looked quite upset to part with Lin, Toph’s oldest daughter and Katara had privately thought that their entire farewell was super cute (she had also secretly envisioned a distant future where she and Toph were mothers-in-law. That had been an enjoyable daydream.)

Sokka and Suki had been next to leave – Katara would follow them with her kids a week later. Their farewell had been loud too. Sokka  kept getting annoyed whenever Bumi said he’d miss Zuko and swordbending (“What do you mean?! I’m right here!! I’ll teach you, you little brat!) and he’d kept getting even more annoyed when Zuko was physically affectionate with Katara in public. Before stepping foot on the ship (read: being pushed aboard by Suki) he gave a very exaggerated ‘my eyes are on you’ look to Zuko with all the hand gesturing. Once again, Katara had only rolled her eyes, but Zuko had grinned sheepishly.

Katara, Bumi, Kya and Tenzin were to leave a little later. They had a much harder time packing and deciding what to take with them (and what to leave behind for later). For a week, the Water Suites, as the rooms were now called had been a complete mess.

Bumi especially seemed to be having a hard time. He loved the Fire Nation – everything about it; the food, the clothes, the palace, his school and swordbending with his Dadko. In those few days, he seemed to stick to Zuko like glue, preferring to do his homework in Zuko’s office as well. Katara had spoken to her son about this at length, several times in fact, that he could choose to stay back. Every single time, he’d only shaken his head firmly.

The last time she’d tried to broach the topic, Bumi had interrupted her with a grin, “You’re my mom, Mom. I go with you.”

Katara had sighed at that. Being stubborn ran in the family, clearly.

The other person who was greatly affected was Izumi. She was not physically clingy – her etiquette training had been too rigid to allow for that, but she’d still follow Katara like a little kitten, demanding attention without seeming too demanding. Katara had grown used to her soft calls of “Mom?”

She’d usually turn around to a bespectacled little face looking up eagerly at her and respond with, “Yes, sweetheart?”

Izumi would then blush and smile to herself and then reply with, “Nothing.”

Katara would then go back to work with a smile, till the same conversation repeated itself. This routine had started happening a few dozen times a day.

And they were busy days as Katara hit pause on her healer project. There were now seventy-five Northern healers across the Fire Nation. They reported to Katara’s second in command, Tapeesa, who handled all issues relating to them with a firm hand and was more than capable of managing the project in her absence. The remaining twenty five would go to the Southern Islands once Katara or someone else finished surveying them. Her remaining projects were similarly delegated to others – temporarily.

No one dared utter that last word, especially as Katara had still not officially been named the Firelord’s consort. She did not occupy a permanent position on the council in an official capacity. However, Minister Chiyo had said to her in confidence, “We will accept these roles for now, but we eagerly await your permanent return, My Lady.” This last part was accompanied by a warm smile and Katara felt such happiness from witnessing it.

There were days of laughter and memories as they all still tried though, to make the best out of the time they had left under the hot Fire Nation sun before they set out for the tundra of the South.

That is not to say Katara did not want to go back to the place she had spent her childhood– she did. She had left fairly abruptly, in the expectation that she would one day return. There were still projects that needed finishing and her help was required in the training of waterbenders and healers, both. Besides, Zuko and her needed the time and space to see if they really did love each other enough to weather the turmoil that would come their way throughout life if they chose to stay together. They would need to see how to handle the politics between their nations and deep-rooted hatred. Even now, some of the ministers here were vocal about their distrust for her and she was sure it would be the case back in the South as well.

And then of course, she was the Southern Tribe’s Ambassador to the Fire Nation and as such was supposed to stay in both nations for nearly equal periods of time. She had her work cut out for her, making sure that, diplomatic relations were running without a single glitch. So that the Fire Nation people, her erstwhile enemies, would accept her completely. So that the Water Tribe people would accept Zuko. So that their children would be safe to play outdoors in either land without being under the watchful eye of two dozen bodyguards at all times.

She sighed audibly. Did she have ulterior motives? Obviously.

She wanted to wrap up the rest of her work as Ambassador as soon as possible so that when she ideally, maybe, if she dared hope – came back here to live forever with the golden eyed man who was now snoring softly as he clung to her in his sleep – the transition would be smooth. No wonder she’d woken up, she thought – it had been too hot to remain asleep.

Kicking off her blankets, she leaned into his embrace for a while. Once again, inhaling the scent of sandalwood that she had now come to associate with him. His shirt was open letting her leave soft butterfly kisses across his torso, lips touching his skin feather light. She came across the lightning scar on her journey, and stopped. Lost in thought.

Memories of that horrible last fight came back to her and she wondered, she had to – why her pouty Prince Zuko had given it all up to take a bolt to his chest for her.

“Why’d you stop?” A low voice rasped and she didn’t need to look up to see that he was frowning.

“Since when have you been awake? Anyway, we need to get up, sun is already high,” she answered.

“Don’t care,” he growled.

“We’re leaving today, Zuko,” she said. The reality of it really hitting her square in the face in that moment. And she felt herself cling to him tighter than earlier.

“Hmm… it would be a problem if you were to… miss the ship…” Zuko replied nuzzling closer in response.

Katara let herself revel in this. The warmth, the safety in this embrace. Zuko’s breath fanned across her brow and she wondered how she’d survive months away. To think that that was how she’d lived for more than three decades, but now it seemed incomprehensible. Absolutely bizarre to stay away from him.

“I’m going to miss you so much, Tara. It breaks my heart,” he whispered- voice muffled against her hair, before she could get a chance to. “I love you. Don’t go. Please. What even am I supposed to do without you?”

He hadn’t pleaded with her like this earlier. He had been understanding of the situation. It may have been the half asleep vulnerability that was getting to him. It was getting to her as well, as Katara felt tears forming while she tried her best to keep her voice from wavering.

“Oh spirits, Zuko you idiot. You’re going to make me cry,” she said, burrowing even closer. 

The embrace became fiercer and soon she felt warm lips on hers in a gentle kiss. A promise of a gentle future, of a partner who loved her – all of her. She returned the favour and soon she felt a tongue snaking in, adding more spice. She moaned and allowed it. They were both going to be late for breakfast.

All in all, it was one of the best mornings of Katara’s life. As she tried to find the strings at the back to tie up her dress, her gaze slid to the man sitting across from her, reading through the reports he’d been handed that morning. The sunlight skimmed over the angles in his face and the serious expression he carried, and danced along the gold in his eyes. He was hers. She could spend every morning just like this one if she so wished, she thought, and a dreamy smile slid across her face.

“What are you staring at, Waterbender?” he asked, without bothering to look up.

“My handsome partner,” she replied readily and then watched with satisfaction as said partner blushed, dropped the papers he was holding and in his haste to grab them, nearly toppled his tea.

Katara giggled. Then, beckoning him over, she said, “Help me tie these damn knots.”

Zuko, looked up at her, and the bare back exposed to him and managed to get to her in the blink of an eye. She could see the overzealous look in his eyes reflected in the mirror in front of her and the bright blush as well. Oh, how she loved this man.

“When did you know you loved me?” The words just slipped out of her mouth carelessly, and then, Zuko looked up at her, jolted from his focused tying of the knots.

“Where’s this coming from?” he asked, a smile in his voice, as he tied the first of many knots to close her dress at the back..

“Just curious,” she answered, with a shy smile.

Zuko thought over it for a bit, stroking his chin as he did. “I don’t know to be honest. That summer, I think, one day at a time. But it could have been earlier as well. Do you remember the crystal catacombs ?” he asked her, meeting her eyes in the mirror.

As if she could ever forget. “I do. That was a long time ago.”

“Yeah… that moment when you touched my face, on the ugly side no less, and offered to heal me with your precious water,” he said, eyes shifting focus as he softly touched her back, tracing a line down with his index finger. Katara shivered. “I had only been a dickhead to you all that time, and you still showed me kindness. I guess up until then, I really had not received too much of that from many people, so I think… it left an impact on me,” he replied with a bowed head.

“But I only realised truly what you meant to me when you accepted Aang’s proposal. I just couldn’t figure out why I felt so horrible then – you were supposed to be my friend, and nothing more. Too late, much too late,” he said with a bitter laugh, even as his eyes blazed. Katara held his gaze, and reached behind her to hold his hand. Zuko continued,  “And then, it didn’t take much for those feelings to return when you came back to me. I tried to fight them, but I never really stood a chance.”

He went back then, to tying her dress up at the back, eyes leaving hers. “So long story short - When did I realise I loved you? That’s easy – probably when you came back here a few months ago. Remember that cracked fountain in the old courtyard? We walked there together for the first time and read the letter he sent you together. You looked so beautiful then, under the moonlight and everything, and the way you looked at me.”

At this, a smile lit up Zuko’s face. Katara disengaged then, and turned around to look at him properly. She held both his hands and looked into his eyes. They were blazing, a molten gold in the sun as he said, in a voice filled with emotion, “I’ll never forget – never. It made me feel all sorts of things and I figured that I probably liked you. That I’d liked you for a long time. I don’t really know when I began calling it love, somewhere along the way – maybe on Ember Island under the gazebo – but perhaps it has always been love. Ever since you touched my scar and offered to heal me in those catacombs. My kind and lovely waterbender.

There was a quiet moment, when she just dazedly looked at him. She had expected more sputtering, not the clear answer she got. There were tears in her eyes again, and one slipped its leash and trailed down her cheek. He wiped it off with his thumb, and brought her back to reality with a, “What about you, Tara?” asked in the softest manner.

Katara blushed. She had asked him quite confidently, but could not meet his eyes when answering. A hand reached out and tipped her chin up, and suddenly she was gazing powerlessly into golden eyes. “I think it was on Ember Island after we came back from our… field trip. Remember? When we were teens? For the first time, I had someone I could depend on who was mature and kind and well… Well,  I’d always thought you were kind of good looking… even when you had that horrible top knot,” she said as she felt her blush deepen.

“Aw, Tara! You had a  crush on me!” Zuko said with delight. “When I was in my ugly phase, no less!”

“Shut up, we’re literally dating. Quite publicly.” Katara retorted and then sighed. “But then you got back together with Mai, and there was Aang, but I don’t think I ever forgot my feelings for you. I… I didn’t know what they were then exactly. But I think I realised after your wedding. Do you remember, you came out after me in the hallway? Too late, much too late. There was nothing that I could do. And so I waited and waited for your letters. It’s messed up, isn’t it?” she asked, humourlessly.

Zuko just shook his head. “What’s important is that we have a second chance. I’m not letting you go so easily this time.”

Katara simply leaned her head on his shoulder, “Neither am I, Firelord. Don’t you know how stubborn I am?”

“All too well,” he sighed.

Katara let out a watery chuckle, even as she hid the tears that were forming once more.

The sun beat down on them and lit up the room. The muted hustle and bustle of the castle could be heard in the distance, even as nearby, a maina bird cooed. Zuko brought his hand through her hair, stroking her, placating her. And once again she thought - there hadn’t been and never would be anyone else for her.

 

“Mom?” Izumi called out for the umpteenth time.

“Yes, sweetheart?” Katara asked, again for the umpteenth time, even as she braided Izumi’s hair while Izumi braided Kya’s.

“Nothing, I just wanted to call you.” Izumi replied, the same reply.

Braid done, Katara bent down to hug the child and felt the rimmed spectacles dig into her shoulder. Nevertheless, she held on tight.

“I’m going to miss you, Mom…” came the watery reply, as Izumi sniffled. Katara pulled away and saw a child with fogged up glasses, scrunching up her nose to keep the tears from falling. Taking the glasses off, she deftly wiped the tears with her sleeve. “I’m going to miss you too, sweetheart. So much. I’ll be back soon though. As soon as I can.”

Izumi just nodded her head, but clung to her tighter. Kya looked fairly weepy herself as she then went on to hug Izumi, braid already in place. They’d made matching sister bracelets with the glass beads Iroh had got from the market and these gleamed in the afternoon sun and the lights they gave off played in the blue room with the mosaic tiles.

There were letters piled in the corner of this room. Letters from her kind Northern healers, the doctors in the Fire Nation hospitals, ministers and everyone else she’d worked with. They wished her safe travels and a speedy return. It had made her cry as she’d read them and Zuko had had to hold her.

Uncle Iroh had taken Bumi on a last minute shopping trip but they managed to return in the nick of time for lunch. Tenzin too, who had a hard time saying his goodbyes to the vast friend group he had made in school. Kya and Izumi were on time for lunch, trying to spend as much time as possible with each other and Katara.

Lunch itself was a very sad affair. Everyone was crying. Sokka, Suki and Toph had left earlier on with their families and while that had been sad, this was another level. Bumi was sniffling out loud with the occasional tear as he clung on the Zuko’s sleeve with one hand. Katara found it endearing that he’d grown out of the need to hide his tears. His Dadko did the best he could to placate him. Tears had never been Zuko’s strong suit, but she could see him doing his best. Iroh looked on with pride.

Even as they loaded the luggage and made their way to the ship, which was now delayed due to their prolonged goodbyes, Bumi kept hold of Zuko’s hand. Kya took the other one, while Izumi and Tenzin held on the each of Katara’s.

Seeing the ship, Tenzin let go of Katara and turned around to fiercely hug Izumi. Then, in front of everyone he took a deep breath and said, “I like you, Uncle Zuko. I like Dad better, but you’re cool too.” At this, Zuko cracked a smile, and pulled him into a hug. Little Tenzin was weak to hugs, so melted in easily.

“Aww!!” the girls called, while Bumi ran in to join in as well. And soon, Kya was pulling in Katara and Izumi too as they all held each other in a many armed hug, right there on the pier. No one knew how long the moment lasted, just that it felt like forever. A new family had formed here, and no one was willing to let go.

Finally, feeling the rays of the setting sun, Katara ordered everyone to disengage. “That’s enough. Everyone on board!” Her voice trembled as she said it, but her children listened. With final hugs, they let go, climbed aboard, waving goodbye from the deck of the ship.

Uncle Iroh walked up to her, pulling out a handkerchief from the folds of his robes. “What an adventure it was, Lady Katara. Your presence was powerful enough to change the tides, eh?” he asked, chuckling at his own joke as he handed the cloth to her.

Katara dabbed at her eyes, and bowed to him. “I can’t thank you enough, for all your wisdom and support over the last year, Uncle Iroh,” she said, and then turning slightly, spoke to the elegant figure in red, who had observed the last few weeks with great interest. “And thank you Ma’am, for putting your faith in me. I will try my best not to disappoint you.”

Ursa sighed and shook her head. Even so, she walked up to her, and placed her hand on the younger woman’s head. It was the Fire Nation symbol for blessing, given by the elders. “Safe travels, Lady Katara. I look forward to the day I can call you daughter,” she said with a smile. “Let Iroh bless you as well and then my son will escort you to the ship, if he can manage to see through all the water clouding his eyes.”

Katara giggled at that, and walked up to Iroh, who blessed her and hugged her fiercely. “Come back soon, my Lady. The nation will suffer with a sulky ruler, and I will greatly miss our tea together.”

She then walked away to pick up Izumi, who was crying unashamedly, “I’ll be back, sweetheart. I’ll be back before you know it. I want to hear all about your studies, so keep writing to me. You’re so amazing, you’ll be fantastic at everything you set your mind to. Be brave. I love you.”

“Love you too, Mom,” the girl managed to say through tears, before she was steered away by Iroh. And then, Katara was alone with Zuko. They were both silent, as they looked at each other.

It was evening again, same as it had been more than a year ago when she’d landed on these shores. Once again, the air hung heavy with sea salt, but also – the smell of firelillies. A tsungi horn played in the distance, same as it had a year ago and the flame shaped headpiece caught the sun and gleamed.

“Four season,” Katara whispered. “I haven’t heard you play it enough.” She couldn’t meet his eyes, even as she stood in front of him.

“I’ll play it for you, as many times as you want, Tara,” he replied, his voice cracking. And then she looked up, into beautiful, molten eyes. The eyes of the boy at the turtleduck pond.

“Why’re you crying?” she asked, wiping away his tears. “Don’t cry. I plan on returning. Just a few months as I settle everything. It’ll give us both some space to think about each other without being in constant contact, and,” she said, trying her best to be brave and holding back tears, “Hasn’t Uncle always said, distance makes the heart fonder?”

There was a moment of silence as he looked away. There was a conflicted expression on his face for a moment before he turned around, resolute. He said then, very quietly, “I’m afraid I’m going to lose you again.”

“What?” Katara asked, shocked.

Zuko only looked more miserable as he answered, “I’ve said my goodbyes to you two times already. And I’ve lost you both times. Uncle also says that if I love something, I should set it free and if it is meant to be, it’ll come back to me. But what if you don’t come back, Tara? What if I lose you again? Then what? I don’t think I’ll be able to bear it.”

And with that, Zuko was weeping. Katara, bent his head down and positioned herself to shield him from view.

 Looking in his eyes, she could tell that he’d held the fear in for a long time. Then, pulling herself up, she was leaning forward to touch their foreheads.

“Katara-”

“I love you,” she whispered. “I love you so much and I’m going to miss you.” It had been a futile effort, because she was crying now. Shedding the tears she wasn’t allowing herself to before her children.

“I love you too, Tara,” he whispered.

She could taste saltwater at the parting of her mouth, and she couldn’t tell if it was his or hers. They stayed like that, in the dimming light of the sun, breathing in each other as the wind whistled around them. Katara felt his hands in her hair again, and she tipped her head to meet his lips. It was a soft kiss, shy and yet sad. A farewell kiss. Katara focused on inhaling the scent of him then, knowing full well that this might be the last one for a long time. Time stood still for them and Katara did not want to let go.

Even as she did, gradually stepping back, Katara asserted in a whisper, “I’m coming back, Zuko. I’m coming back to you, so wait for me.” A smile played on her face as she continued, “I love you too much to set you free now. Also, you’ve already offered to marry me, Firelord. And I’ve accepted,” Katara said, as she tugged on the beautiful comb he’d given her. She’d worn it that day and she had no doubt that she’d wear it every day if she could. “Don’t you dare run away now, or I will be very, very upset.”

Zuko laughed through his tears, and then he was kissing her again, passionately as if there was no tomorrow. Her hands came up around him, holding him to her one last time, and he did the same. Pulling her to him till it felt like they had become one. Her legs lifted off the ground slightly. She came up for breath, but he pulled her back, and she revelled for one last time in his solid, comforting presence.

It seemed to last forever. Or that’s what she would have willed.

But then, Zuko was letting her go, and she was climbing up the gangway, with trudging steps.

 And then, as she leaned on the deck railing, the ship sailed off.

And she saw the figures on the pier get smaller and smaller.

“Who’d have known?” She thought as the lights of the Caldera dimmed and the gates of Azulon approached and her heart felt like it was being ripped in two. The ship sailed on and the light dimmed.

For the longest time, Katara continued standing there, motionless, adrift with that single thought in her head. Night set in true and proper, and Yue’s benevolent light shone on them. She felt like maybe, just maybe, it was warmer and brighter on their patch of sea.

Soon there were only the outer Fire Nation islands and the humid air to surround them. The same scenery she’d seen when she’d come here, now floating back. She remembered how excited the kids had been to see such exotic sights. Now, they were quiet, in their own cabins she assumed. Bumi and Tenzin were sharing one while Kya shared with her.

After what felt like an endless amount of time, but no time at all, she felt a tug at her hand. She turned around and there was Kya, asking her to help waterbend the ship faster. The same as she had on the journey to the Fire Nation.

And as Katara finally moved from her spot, going through the motions of bending on auto-pilot, she thought to herself once again. Who’d have known, that her journey would come to such a conclusion. Who indeed. She’d set off, only for a brief change of pace, to regroup with her children and to see the sights. And now she was returning, as Ambassador Katara, one of the chief members in the Firelord’s Council and an active diplomat in the Four Nations Conference. Who knew that she’d return with a larger family, a new daughter and a much loved partner- who happened to be the Firelord and her old friend. What an adventure it had been.

But then, Katara thought, even as the water parted and the ship moved at a supernatural pace with a sniffling Kya giving her company; perhaps… perhaps she had hoped, somewhere in her mind.

And this would only be between her and Yue, but Katara could admit it to herself now. She let go of her form to lift her head up to soak in the light of the moon. Time passed and the sounds of the ocean soothed and washed away her guilty conscience.

She had hoped fifteen months ago that there would be some chance of reconnecting with Zuko. She could not have imagined all that had come to pass, even in her wildest dreams, but she had hoped to see her first love once again.

After all, she had had the chance to go to see Toph or Kyoshi Island instead, all those months back. But she’d chosen the Caldera, she had chosen Zuko.

Notes:

Surprise in the last chapter! Thank you for sticking with me this far, just one more to go.

Chapter 27: Home again

Notes:

So uhh.. chapter count increased because the epilogue felt too clunky for me to include all of it in one chapter.
And, the live action has dropped! Yay? I may not watch it, but I'm keen to hear what everyone has to say about it.
Also, no beta once again. Please look past any grammatical errors. If it's anything major, let me know and I'll edit the chapter to correct it.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Thus began the long journey back.

It was dull, with nothing but sea around. Tensions were high as everyone was apprehensive about the welcome they’d receive back home. There was no exotic adventure waiting for them this time. The temperature started dropping and the woollens came out once again. The colour of the water changed from a lighter blue to a navy colour. There was the occasional chunk of ice floating by, the penguin-seal and the species of whale that they were more accustomed to. Sunlight hours became shorter as it was nearly winter in the poles. This did nothing for the morale of the crew to no one’s surprise.

Bumi and Kya fought approximately twenty times a day, Tenzin would terrify everyone initially by going missing – only to be found on the highest mast. And Katara… Katara was sea-sick like never before. It started a few days into their journey, when all of a sudden she just couldn’t stomach the motion of the ship. Sometimes it was better and sometimes worse. Her healing did not cut it, and it only resolved with a combination of her healing and Fire Nation medicine.

This left only Kya to bend the ship forward quite often. The change in the seas and the occasional thunderstorm did not help either. Three weeks in, they were accosted by a Kraken and it had been all Katara could do to defeat it before needing to upend the contents of her stomach down the side of the ship.

The whole ordeal had put everyone on edge.

Her children did the best they could to care for her. Kya tried to use her fledgling healing powers to try to cure her – to no avail. She also tried to bend the ship forward gently with Tenzin’s aid, because if she did it too fast, Katara got sick. Bumi hovered around, waiting on her hand and foot, trying to help but not knowing what to do. The ship’s crew tried to prepare light meals for her, which seemed to be the only thing she could down.

They received two hawks from the Caldera in this duration. They seemed to have been written within a few days of each other, but because of a thunderstorm, one had been delayed so much so that it reached them only a day before they docked port in the South.

Both brought letters from the Caldera. Honestly, receiving them felt like a fresh breeze in the air sticky with sea salt and tension.

Both letters spoke of how much their family in the Fire Nation missed them. Izumi had written about all the new things they were learning in school in order so that Kya and Bumi wouldn’t miss out. She’d also enclosed a few dried firelillies. The smell made them all nostalgic, even as the weather soured once again. It was the dragon festival there and the lights were blazing across the Caldera throughout the night.

Zuko had written a private letter for her, which she would not let the children read – for their own safety as well as one which was safe for the eyes of kids. He’d also included some of his recently penned verses.

 

Even in my thoughtlessness, I think of you

Why did we have to part? I wonder

Your nearness gave me happiness, immeasurable

Equal is my anguish in your distance

 

She clutched that letter and cried herself to sleep that night. And then she got upset because the ink had blotched with her tears. She didn’t know why she wasn’t able to control her emotions better, but all she knew is that everything would have been better with him by her side.

She missed him so much already. Her heart ached. She hoped somewhat selfishly that an ocean away, his did as well.

 

They sighted the mainland in the early hours of the next morning. A large unending shelf of ice, it was beautiful and ethereal in its own right. Katara was feeling slightly better that day, so she managed to speed up their ship till the main port of the city was in view.

And soon, there were kayaks of waterbenders making way as they bended the ice barricades and the first line of defence away and then swiftly placed it back when the ship entered. Katara thought she could see a few women in the ranks as well- definitely more than there had been earlier. She took a moment to feel some pride for the progress she was seeing.

The south had no massive sculptures to intimidate guests entering the city, but instead there were sheets of ice, forming an optical illusion reflecting and refracting sunlight, and thick enough to protect the city. Only someone high up in the military would be able to bend them away successfully. It had been Pakku and Hakoda’s brainchild.

The city was as majestic as she’d left it – with the ice sculptures and all sorts of water craft around. There was a crowd of blue gathered and a lot of enthusiastic gesturing was going on. As soon as the ship docked and the gangplank was lowered, a large figure bundled in blue,  bounded onto the ship, hugging his sister so tight she was lifted clean off the surface.

“WELCOME HOME!!!” Sokka yelled into her ear. Giving Katara only a moment to understand what was going on before he was bounding away. 

“WELCOME HOME!!” he repeated with equal enthusiasm as he pulled his nephews and niece into a tight hug as well. Kya squealed and Bumi and Tenzin laughed as he picked them all up high, one by one.

Suki made it onto the ship next, embracing her softly with a, “Good to have you back, sister.” The epitome of grace as always. She tugged on Katara’s hand, pulling her out of her daze as they both stepped out from inside the craft onto the pier. As Katara’s eyes adjusted to the light, she could make out a lot of people waiting and cheering. All her old students, fellow healers and even a lot of people she didn’t recognise. In front of all of them was Elder Hakoda, with a big smile on his face and his arms wide open.

“My daughter has returned,” he called in his deep baritone and Katara, suddenly feeling like a child again, ran headfirst into his arms.

“Dad… Dad, I missed you,” she cried softly. Large fat drops rolled down her eyes and she clung to her father. It was a relief seeing them all safe and well. It was a relief to have arrived at their destination finally and to be greeted with such love.

“Well, you’re home now,” he said to her as he gently patted her back. “What an adventure, huh? I want to hear all about it. Every last detail,” he said, and here he nudged the firelily comb in her hair.

Katara froze for half a second, but at his continued reassuring patting, relaxed again. Soon there was another heavy weight at her back, crushing her. Sokka had joined in for a family hug. A water tribe family hug was truly a thing of beauty. There were tears and laughter and strong arms around Katara and she was reminded of when she’d reunited with her father post the war. There wasn’t a single dry eye around.

It took a while for them to all disengage. Katara was then passed from hand to hand as everyone welcomed her back. There were more stares on her than before. Even more on the red in her comb, and not all of them felt kind.

The other elders had gathered some distance away. They greeted her as the returning waterbending master and as the Ambassador of the tribe who had made a big difference in the last conference. There was a lot of respect accorded to her, some of it forced. All in all, Katara thought the response was far less rigid than she’d been expecting.

Dinner was a large affair. Bumi absolutely gorged himself and even Katara indulged a little in the foods she was most used to. There were many stories to be shared, but everyone seemed to be avoiding the elephant in the room. Katara slipped into Sokka’s room later in the night with a pot of tea as the two of them tore into the latest gossip from the Fire Nation and the Tribes.

Hakoda had been quiet the previous evening, but it seemed all was not forgiven as he called her early morning on the very next day. They sat on the rugs, facing each other – father and daughter.

“Let’s talk, daughter,” he began, holding his steaming mug of tea in his hand. Tea was necessary, this early in the morning, Katara thought, suppressing a yawn as a seagull squawked in the distance.

“Sure Dad. About what though?” She asked, nervously.

Hakoda hmphed. “About that comb in your hair, for a start.” His face was stoic, as though prepared to go to war.

“And what about it?” Katara asked, innocently again, sipping her own tea. It was funny watching her Dad get flustered.

“Who gave it to you?” he pressed.

“I might have bought it myself,” Katara shrugged. She could see her father’s eyebrows scrunching slightly closer with each sentence.

“Katara. Daughter,” Hakoda said with finality. “I know you didn’t. We live far away, but the rumours have reached us as well.”

“Is that all there is? Rumours?” Katara asked slyly as she set down her mug.

Hakoda continued sheepishly, “And Sokka, that boy crumbled under pressure. He told me everything.”

Katara sighed. Her father continued looking into her eyes. And she looked into his - kind eyes, like a warm lake on Ember Island, currently filled with worry. They prompted Katara into speech, wringing her hands as she did. And once again she felt like a teenage girl, explaining her first crush to her father.

“I love him, Dad. I love Zuko, and he loves me.”

Here Hakoda’s face smoothed and he took a deep breath. Katara continued, “He’s accepted the kids and they like him too. And I think of his daughter as my own. He’s loved me for a long time, Dad and I feel so happy with him. We’re all healing, the kids and I and he’s helped us so much. I can’t let this go, I can’t let him go. We’re prepared to face the challenges and-”

“Okay, okay,” Hakoda said, raising his hands up. “You can stop now.” There was a moment of silence. And then another. It stretched on for a while. Katara looked down at her feet.

Finally a gruff voice said, “I’d always liked Zuko.”

His daughter lifted her head up. Hakoda’s eyes were still the same mix of warmth and understanding.

“Such a good boy. And he’s grown into a fine man. I have no doubt that he will make a good husband and father. And Bumi and Kya have talked my ear off about him in one evening already,” he laughed. “Dadko this, and Dadko that – I don’t think it’ll ever end. And we’ve gotten a hawk from the Fire Nation this morning as well. I doubt the bright pink letter directed to you from the Palace was written by the Firelord - more likely his daughter,” here he chuckled again, even as Katara began getting impatient.

“Yes, yes. I’ll hand you your letters once we’re done talking. Let the birds rest, they’ve travelled a great distance through at least one storm,” he said. Katara just felt more impatient. She wanted her letters – now. Hakoda sighed.

“I’ll get to the point. I know you’re all grown up now, but I’m still your Dad. And I really don’t want to see my little girl unhappy again. I’ve seen a lot of that over the years. If you really do love him-”

“I do!” Katara interrupted.

Hakoda sighed again. “If you really do love him, then I suppose there is nothing I can say to stop you. I don’t want to stop you either. Just know, that you have chosen a difficult route. Possibly more difficult than when you were the Avatar’s Wife. You will have to leave home and cross the seven seas for a foreign nation with its own distinct culture and make a life there, ensure your children adapt and learn to get past peoples’ prejudices. And likewise, he will have to understand you and your people. It is all an uphill battle. But it is worth it, with the right person by your side. Once again, I hold no grudge against that country. It’s all in the past now. But I can’t say the same for the rest of my tribesmen. I worry about you, daughter. And I worry that you’ve been too hasty.”

Katara shook her head. What he said made sense. And these were thoughts that had swirled in Katara’s head as well for a fairly long time.

“Dad. We know,” she replied. “We have thought of this already, and … we’re willing to give it our all. Zuko hasn’t proposed to me formally, but he might as well have. This is a trial run, with us staying away from each other, but I think.. with how much I miss him, there is no other choice for me. I wish there was some way to prove to you, how much he means to me…”

Katara paused here. Her decision did not make a lot of sense, but at the same time – she would not give up on this love. She could not. The previous day her Dad had proclaimed that she was home finally, but… it did not feel like it. She felt like a visitor, in her hometown. Incomplete, in a way. It was all the same as she had left it, but it just didn’t feel right.

Once again, Hakoda shook his head. “My stubborn, brave daughter.”

They were both silent after that. Then he retorted, "What do you mean, he hasn't proposed to you? He gave you that comb didn't he? The one you wear everywhere? You clearly accepted."

Katara blushed and looked away. "He didn't know what he was doing," she said softly.

Hakoda snorted. "That's only true for the first gift you know. I'm fairly certain that the pearl necklace I can just about see from under your kuspuk was very much intentional. And again, you accepted. You are married, in the eyes of our Tribe."

"Well the customs have changed slightly now..." Katara muttered. "The Northern immigrants demand that a ceremony is to be followed. The Fire Nation has a ceremony too."

"Well I remember when you rejected Aang's gifts for years," came the next remark. 

Katara just turned away, her face burning. Hakoda laughed. 

They talked for some more time after that, watching the sun rise over the frozen sea. A whale lunged out of the water in the distance.

 

The problem started after this. Just as she finished the dregs of her tea that Katara had got for them, she felt her stomach turn again. The seasickness returned with a vengeance even though she had reached land, a month of sea travel later.

Katara tried to ignore it at first. Assumed that it was likely due to something that she’d eaten on board that had gone bad. That was Sokka’s guess as well, as she rushed out of the breakfast room to hurl one morning. But none of her children got sick, even though they ate the same foods. And either way, she thought, she seemed to have gotten through the worst of it on board. These days the vomiting came on only occasionally. The nausea was nearly always there.

She carried on with her work and tried not to make it very obvious that she was unwell. The first day she went to her water bending classes, her students recognised her immediately, and she had a great day distributing the exotic treats she’d got for them from foreign lands. She’d planned to only come in sparingly now. It was time to pass on the mantle and had instead picked out students who could replace her.

She could see her children settle in as well. They were more guarded, but she found them playing with their old mates soon enough and every evening they seemed to be happy. The smiles would only broaden with every hawk from the Fire Nation. And then they’d spend the next day planning what to write on paper which was relatively expensive in the poles.

Zuko sent around one hawk a week. The weather was turbulent, which meant they sometimes arrived late. There were always three letters at least – one from Izumi and two from Zuko. Sokka had opened the letter meant for Katara once by mistake. His shouts of ‘My eyes! My eyes!’ could probably be heard from the neighbouring village. That’s not to say that the entire letter could be rated adults only, there were some wholesome parts about how much he missed her, and almost always there was poetry.

Katara felt herself get weepy every time she read his letters. And she did read and re-read them quite often. She missed her grumpy firebender.

She put off going to the healing huts for a few days even after coming back to the tribes, till a day came when she was feeling nearly normal. She did not want the healers to catch on to her sickness and possibly make guesses at the diagnosis.

 Bumi helped of course. He was always there, giving her her Fire Nation anti-sickness medication and helping clean up when required. The Healers were equally happy to see her. She taught a few lessons, teaching them the things she’d learned in the Fire Nation. However, here too, she wrapped up her involvement- there were enough trained healers now and she had to focus on her official job as Ambassador. She was more tired than usual, but she felt she managed to work well enough.

The councilmen were less happy, but with her position being what it was, and with Sokka’s backing, there was nothing anyone could say or do. Though Katara did feel that they had softened as well. Tales of how she had handled the Northern Tribe and wrangled them some great deals had reached their ears. She found that she did not aggressively have to push her agenda and most of them were keen to side with her. There was even talk of getting another woman into the council.

This was a most pleasing development.

Katara did find though, that she was running low on patience these days, and less able to deal with crap thrown her way in these meetings. Most likely the nausea had tired her out. She had hissed at two councilmen, stared down three and had a proper go at one when he’d gotten on her nerves with a ridiculous proposal.

However, even with the sickness, it was easy to do one job instead of three. All in all, she thought she was doing a decent job of hiding things till she got better.

Suki noticed of course. She threw Katara a meaningful look one morning in the kitchen after the latter had retched loudly. Which Katara ignored.

 It couldn’t be that. It couldn’t. She had considered it of course, but they’d been careful… it just couldn’t be…

Apparently, Suki was not the only one who was worried.

“I’m worried,” Sokka said plainly to her a few mornings after.

“Bumi, Kya and Tenzin are too, but they won’t say anything because you’ve become so snappy lately that they’re scared of you,” he said, managing to look annoyed but worried at the same time. “What’s up, dude? Seriously.”

“Nothing’s up, Sokka. I’ll be fine,” Katara said, through gritted teeth. Hoping against hope that if she ignored what was happening, it would go away somehow.

In the last couple weeks, since coming back to the tribes, every evening she’d place her hands on her own belly, coated with glowing water. Something she’d done to dozens of women in the past. She could feel nothing. Every time.

However, she could not ignore the sneaking suspicion. The tendrils of doubt and against all reason, hope

If this was, what she thought it was – it could not have happened at a worse time. As much as she missed him, it was just not the right time.

She was scared. She was terrified. And it was making her unreasonably moody. She did not know what to tell her family, her tribe, her lover. But at the same time, there was happiness. A blissful joy in her, when she thought a tanned golden eyed child running through the sunlit fields.

Yet, every time she assessed her abdomen she did not feel anything and every time she felt disappointed against all reason. 

It confused her and the confusion scared her further. She did not want to think about it just yet.

The next day, a healer arrived to see her, no doubt sent by her well-meaning brother.

“He doubts my abilities, does he…” Katara muttered.

“Don’t take it personally, lady Katara. He’s just worried,” was the calm answer, before she burst into a flurry of questions that Katara had expected, but felt uncomfortable answering all the same. 

The healer put a hand on Katara’s belly. The cool water always felt nice, maybe because Katara had been feeling unreasonably hot recently. The healer with her placid face, said quite calmly, “I can’t feel any notable disease causing your symptoms. But you know as well as I do that there’s something else that might cause the exact same symptoms. I say that I can’t feel anything just now, but this healing business is not foolproof in the initial months as you know all too well. I’d urge you to keep checking regularly and seriously consider what this could mean.”

Katara avoided her gaze as well.

The healer only sighed.

 “We were always careful,” Katara replied finally. Saying the same things she’d been saying to herself for weeks.

"When did you last bleed?" was the next question. Quite expected at that.

Katara sighed in frustration. It was a fact, that her monthly bleeding hadn’t come two months in a row now. However, she knew it to be occasionally erratic, so she couldn’t be sure yet. And she said that out loud. 

“We can take care of it, if you wish it,” was the healer, Yuka’s only reply. “Your brother called me here, but you are the patient. I don't owe have to tell him anything that you'd rather keep secret. It was you who ensured women had free and easy access to a healer if they were to become pre-”

“I’m not,” Katara said shaking her head, even as her eyes went wide. “I’m not, I can’t be.”

Yuka - an elderly woman who Katara had known all her life, just gave her a kindly smile. “Call me whenever you need me.” And the lady let herself out.

Katara really had to sit down for a while after that. She placed her hands on her still flat tummy. “I can’t be,” she said again, faintly. But she was running late for the first meeting of the day, and she pushed it to the backburner. She’d think about it in the evening.

But she didn’t. She pushed it forward to the next day. It was irresponsible of her, she knew. But she was scared, so scared. If this really was what she thought she was… it would throw their whole lives off track. Katara deliberated writing to Zuko about this, but she couldn’t, not on a baseless assumption. It would only worry him that she was unwell. And, what if he was less than absolutely happy about the news… ?

It would devastate her. Body and soul.

The next day, she felt more tired than usual. Even one of the captains of the merchant ships she was inspecting asked about her wellbeing. She just shot him a sharp look and he looked away.

Bumi who had accompanied her on her job, as he quite often did these days, suggested to her quietly, “Mom, I think you should call it a day today.”

Everyone thought that Bumi was naturally good at diplomacy and a fast learner. He looked like he enjoyed being by her side as well and while Katara was fairly certain that he had found his calling quite early in life, she also knew he’d started coming along initially only to help out his sick mother.

“Why would I do that,” Katara asked, more sharply than she’d intended, even as she heard herself get breathless while walking the short distance between port to office.

“Mom.” Bumi said, stopping in his tracks. “I really think you’re sick, we need to stop for today.”

“No,” Katara said, panting. “No…”

And just then, she began feeling very light, as if she was spinning dangerously.

Distantly, she heard screaming, and the next thing she knew , the sky was getting darker and farther away… Bumi – was that Bumi? Was screaming. There were people rushing over.  And around her lower body, she could feel something sticky pooling …

Blood?

She blacked out.

Notes:

Bit of a cliffhanger, I know. Sorry.
Next chapter is nearly ready, will be there hopefully by weekend?
Also can't attest to the medicine in this chapter and the next. Apart from the symptoms of anaemia and morning sickness, which is real bitch for some women.
I felt there has to be some element of fantasy to the medicine because otherwise it's a bit boring? idk. Also modern medicine with its blood tests and scans doesn't exist in this universe. But the medicine can't be too fantastical either - I mean I've read so many light novels where every symptom of severe sickness is coughing up blood and I'm like. This is just tuberculosis. And I hate to break it to y'all, but no one can definitively proclaim pregnancy just by feeling a pulse (as seen in many novels). Anyhoo, long rant short, will be back shortly with an update.

Also, I hope Katara's fear and confusion makes sense to everyone. And so do her feelings of hope and happiness.

Chapter 28: Fire on Ice

Notes:

I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve gone over this one, but no beta- so mistakes are bound to happen. Please forgive them and realise that I can’t write better than this lol.
This story can stretch on, but I've chosen to officially draw it to close here.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The next thing she knew, was that she was in one of the healing huts, staring up at the ceiling. There were lit lanterns all around and hushed worried voices floated by.

“Wa- water,” she croaked.

Someone rushed over immediately, nearly running into one of the cabinets as they did. She managed to focus slightly, and her brother’s face came into view.

“Sokka…” she managed as he slowly fed her water out of a straw.

“Shh… sleep now,” he said, distraught. His face was drawn and he had large black circles under his eyes. Huh.

“Why…? Why worried?” she whispered, between sips and nearly choked.

He hurriedly thumped her back and then when she was comfortable again, laid her down. She blacked out again, immediately.

There were more ghostly voices, time seemed to pass in a daze as people floated in and out.

My baby… what happened to my baby…

But no thought stuck as she wafted in and out of consciousness.

The next time she woke up, Suki was sitting next to her, knitting serenely, the sun setting behind her. She’d recently taken up the hobby, and Katara thought she was quite good at it.

She tried to push herself up and failed, only managing to look around, bewildered.

“Oh, you’re up,” was the first thing Katara heard. And then, “Are you up for good?”

She only nodded in response, still confused. Suki brough a water bag and fed her some water. “Drink first, questions later,” Suki commanded. And Katara followed obediently as cool water soothed her parched lips and throat.

The order seemed to be drink first, bearhug next and questions afterwards, because Suki kept her knitting aside and enveloped her in her arms for the longest time. Katara laid her head on her shoulder, finding herself too weak to keep moving.

“Sister, what’s going on? Why am I in the healing huts?” Katara managed to ask.

Suki let go and held her firmly at arm’s length. Katara could make out the tears in her eyes, as Suki’s face scrunched up.

“We’ve been worried. So worried. You fainted and then the healers put you to sleep as they did the blue glowy thing and then you were in and out of consciousness for 3 days. Even now, I can’t be sure that you won’t go back to sleep.” Here, Suki stifled a sob.

Katara, who rarely saw Suki get so emotional, thought back to her brief bursts of memory – her dad or brother or sister-in-law by her bedside as she wove in and out of consciousness.

“Three days!! Why- what-” Katara exclaimed.

Suki’s face settled in a flat line, her face giving nothing away.

“What, what’s happened to me?” Katara whimpered. “Suki, just tell me! Am I okay? Is my child-?”

Suki opened her mouth to say something, brows raised but then closed it again.

“So then you guessed already, my Lady,” A voice called from the doorway. “You must’ve been more than half-sure, even when I told you, a few days back. You’re right – you’re pregnant,”

“Yuka!! I told you, we’ll tell her gently!” Suki cried.

“She knows already,” the healer said as she came in through the door and sat herself at the edge of the bed. She lifted the covers gently and coating her hands with water, began assessing Katara’s tummy.

“She can’t keep feigning ignorance. Everything seems to be in order now though. You over-exerted yourself earlier which caused a bit of bleeding. Always more dangerous with twins. But now that’s all settled. You’re safe and the babies are safe.”

Katara just sat stock-still for the longest time. Everything that Yuka had said, rattling through her head. Then, “Twins?” she asked softly.

“A boy and a girl it feels like,” Yuka answered readily.

It took a long time for Katara to lift her trembling hands to her womb.

She looked at Suki for guidance, and the woman perched herself on the bed to hold her.

“How far…” Suki asked.

“Just more than two months. As you both know, it’s always a bit unpredictable upto two months, but now I can feel with certainty. You are pregnant, Master Katara” Yuka answered readily. “The only people who know are you, me and Lady Suki. The rest of your family suspects but does not know. Try feeling for yourself.”

And so, with shaky hands, Katara managed to coat her hands with water. And sure enough, for the first time, there they were.

Twin heartbeats.

Tiny, weak.

But present and beating steadily.

Katara began crying in earnest.

 

 

It was evening. Somewhere a pack of gulls were calling out, but it was quiet otherwise. Suki had begun lighting the fires in the hut. Katara sat still fumbling with her blankets. It had been half a day now that she’d been awake. Half a day where she alternatively dehydrated herself by crying and then Suki would ensure she was rehydrated by making her drink pouch after pouch of water.

She didn’t ask any questions regarding her plans or why she was upset. She didn’t have to. And Katara knew that whatever she chose, Suki would side with her.

She could abort the pregnancy. That was the right thing to do – it was an uncertain time, a time when her children could receive hate just by virtue of who their parents were. She was not sure if the tribes or fire nation would be accepting of them. She and Zuko had not yet created a world safe and happy enough to nurture their biological children. And besides, they both had plans for the next few years – various ideas they’d thought up in the quiet of the night, over tea and sometimes on the bed. Ideas to better the world. And all of these would be fraught with complications should she undergo childbirth in the next few months. It was all complicated and it made her unhappy. So she knew logically what she should do.

But even in her mess of emotions, even in the new tangle of complications when nothing was set in stone yet, she knew one thing. She knew what she wanted to do.

She wanted to keep this pregnancy. It wasn’t the ideal time, and things were less than perfect, but she wanted to have his children. She had spent the entire evening, holding her stomach protectively to herself, weeping and weeping.

Now instead of one child, she was dreaming of a golden eyed boy and a blue eyed girl.

It made no sense and it would upend her life. Again. And that of her children and likely Zuko’s life as well…

It was selfish of her, perhaps. In a time when they hadn’t set their future plans in stone, when she couldn’t be sure he would be happy with her decision, a time when her family was just healing, when they were getting ready for more changes in their lives, a time of such turbulence, in a time such as this, she would be introducing two fragile lives into this dangerous world.

 But..

“I want to keep them. I want to keep our babies. Mine and His. I want them Suki. I want them so much. I’ll fight the world for them. For my family.”

The statement had popped out of Katara’s mouth quite suddenly. It startled Suki too, who looked around at her. But the surprise lasted only a moment.

“If that’s what you want.”

Katara nodded. She only had a moment before Suki swooped in to hug her once again.

“In that case, congratulations, Katara.” Katara could hear the smile in her voice and once again, felt tears dripping down her face. She placed her arms protectively around her still flat tummy and allowed herself a smile.

Life would get much more difficult once again, she didn’t know how her family and children would react and she couldn’t be wholly sure how Zuko would react. But she was happy. Now that she had made the decision, she was so exceedingly happy that she couldn’t contain herself. Twins! She was having twins!

“Thank you. I’m so happy that you were the first to know.” Katara said, smiling more broadly. “Let’s call the rest of them in tomorrow,” she told Suki. “Let me have this evening.”

 

The next morning found Water Tribe Chieftan Sokka, Elder Hakoda and Lady Suki sitting together, cramped in the healing hut with three tearful children. All three of them were holding hands, even as little Tenzin whimpered, “Is Mom sick? Is she dying?” Kya and Bumi looked terrified as well, but seemed to be holding it in.

Katara was sitting with her legs dangling from the bed. She’d taken care to look as fresh as possible, but clearly she still looked very much the patient that she was. Sighing, she answered, “No, I’m not.”

There was relief etched on every face then.

“I’m fine. We,” she said, placing her hands on her stomach, “are all fine.”

Realisation dawned on her brother and father’s faces as the kids still looked confused. Suki smiled proudly.

“I’m pregnant with twins,” she said out loud, a little nervously. “Zuko is the father.”

Someone squealed loudly, and then Kya was suddenly climbing on her bed and hugging Katara by the waist. “I’m going to be an elder sister again!! I’m so excited!”

Katara looked up from the little girl clinging to her. Bumi was beaming widely, an excited gleam in his eyes and Tenzin who’d slowly understood the situation, was flying on the bed to cling to her from the other side.

“Can I feel them? Do they know I’m here. Mom, tell them I’m going to be the best older brother.”

Katara felt moisture gathering at her eyes as she laughed and nodded through the tears even as she clutched her children to herself.

Suki was holding Sokka’s hand as his face flipped from happy to angry to happy again. “I mean, super happy for you and all Katara, but I am going to skewer that stupid firebender the moment I see him,” was the only thing he managed to say.

Hakoda had a weary smile on his face. “For the love of all the spirits, why can’t you kids just have normal, peaceful, boring lives.”

Katara just grinned at him and in response, and he got up and enveloped her (and Kya and Tenzin) in an awkward hug. “I’ll get you the stationery to write your letter to my prospective son-in-law. I hope he’s less of a bastard than the previous one, but seeing your situation now, there’s not much hope.” He said drily.

“Mom! Grandad used a bad word!” Bumi squealed.

“Dad don’t swear in front of the kids!” Katara yelled.

“Ugh I already sent that dickhead a letter when you wouldn’t wake up. Thought he’d want to know since you must’ve kept your sickness from him,” Sokka said.

“Sokka!!” Suki and Katara yelled.

“Mom I learned a new swear word,” Bumi said.

There was more squabbling as their little family fought and laughed together. Later that evening, Sokka got out his stash of Fire Nation sweets and a huge bowl of confetti which he and Tenzin showered on everyone as Katara gorged herself on food.

 

Katara was discharged back home that very day. The same day, she took her children aside and told them firmly. “Just because I’m going to be having babies with Zuko now, does not mean I don’t love you. I will love you all equally. Always, do you understand?” she asked

Fervent nodding ensued.

“Our family will be bigger now. A few changes. I’m not sure what will happen in the next few months or years, but one thing will stay the same. I’m your Mom. And I will always love you the same.”

“Of course, you will, Mom, we all know that, don’t be silly,” Kya said confidently. “I think we’re all actually hoping that you get a bit less hands-on with us now that you have something else to focus on,” she said drily.

Katara laughed at that, “Not a chance! Anyone who misbehaves gets to change the diapers!”

“Eww!” was the collective sentiment.

“Don’t worry, Mom,” Bumi said finally. “We’ll be fine.”

They understood, her children. They were excited as well and Katara was relieved. The rest, she could handle.

She penned her letter addressed to the Fire Lord of the Caldera and went to sleep. She’d wait for his reply before informing the council back home. She wondered what he’d say. Would he be excited? Would he be scared? Would he laugh when he read her letter or would he cry with tears of joy. She couldn’t wait to find out.

Everyday she’d get up and feel her tummy and feel a bit more pleased.

Things carried on as they were. There were rumours that the Master Waterbender was sick. Katara could see the people gossiping. But no one outright said anything about her being pregnant. About the Avatar’s former wife being pregnant. Katara was strictly put on house arrest. Bumi did her chores, carried correspondence. Katara slowly made it only to the meetings she could. It was not like she could do anymore with Suki keeping a watchful eye on her.

Tenzin’s room was converted into a study for Katara to sort her files and receive visitors in. The boys shared one room. Kya tried to heal Katara’s bodyaches as best as she could as slowly they saw the makings of what would be a huge belly. Yuka saw her nearly everyday, tsk-ing at the lack of a husband in this time.

She didn’t have to say it. Katara was agitated as well, for the hawks hadn’t come for a few weeks now. The father of her children had still not replied. So she’d written another letter a few days later. But even after that, there was no reply. They’d received a letter from Izumi in the interim from some time back. She’d only fleetingly stated that Zuko was busy and was getting ready to go somewhere.

Katara had hissed with frustration.

She didn’t know what to do with herself if the father, her partner wouldn’t talk to her. Did he really hate the idea of children so much? Was the year she’d spent with him just a dream? Sitting by oneself in the huts at night with nothing but the wind to keep you company provides plenty of time to think. And think and think some more. Zuko would not abandon her. He would not.

And yet…

Sokka told her that there was a thunderstorm in the nearby seas. And sure enough, the weather took a turn for the worse. And her mood along with it. She could feel people walking on eggshells around her. Her family was careful as well.

But there was still no reply.

She could tell the anger and anxiety on Sokka’s face as well as another day went by without a response. The children had caught on as well, although Katara had been careful to hide her tears. They were agitated too, and Katara tried to reassure them as best she could.

And then it happened. Nearly a month after the initial letter was sent. Shrill screeches breaking the quiet of the night.

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

“MONSTER!” a scream went up.

“THERE’S A MONSTER COMING FROM THE SKIES” someone else screamed.

There was more screaming and yelling. The military assembled as the entire tribe woke up and went out to look. Katara could hear the warriors gearing up and the protective ice covering coming up around the town. She could hear healers gathering and civilians taking to the under ground bunkers.

Katara ducked out to see fires lit and people rushing in battle formations.

“YOU. STAY INSIDE.” Sokka yelled at her with a finger pointed in Katara’s direction as he ran to the origin of the screams, helmet and boomerang at the ready.

“That’s not happening,” Katara muttered. “You three, stay inside,” she called back to her kids, and strode out, pulling her parka to cover her. The wind was howling the snow was piling up. It was a horribly dark and stormy night and no one could see even a few feet in front of them. She managed to join the crowd of healers, out of Sokka’s line of sight.

“Where is it?” someone called

“Where did it come from?” Katara asked the closest junior healer, who jumped at being addressed directly by a war hero.

“I d-d-don’t know-”

Katara wondered. If it wasn’t ahead or in any horizontal plane, then it was-

She lifted her head up, parka falling back.

There it was. Not in front of her, but immediately above her. Diving headfirst from the cloudbank above was a great red serpent. The snow seemed to melt off its scales as if burned. It’s snout was spitting smoke and flames and its body, lined with tall scales along its back, seemed to go on for miles.

Dragon.

Katara recognized the dragon.

“STOP!!” She called out. “DON’T ATTACK IT!”

She pushed through the healers, who made way for her out of awe. She ran out towards the head where Sokka would be. Her arms out as fended off the ice aimed at the dragon. Some still reached him, but none seemed to touch him.

“Stop!!” she screamed, slightly out of breath and the people around her confusedly did so. And then, Sokka’s voice called out, louder than hers. “DO NOT ATTACK THE BEAST. I REPEAT, DO NOT ATTACK THE BEAST.”

He seemed to have recognised Druk as well.

He cleared out the area and the crowd confusedly made way. The dragon coiled in on itself as it landed softly, glaring at everyone around it as it did with large yellow eyes. No one let their guard down even as a figure slid off it’s back.

Then there was silence, as the standoff continued, except for the whooshing of the wind which had started winding down. The snow still pelted them, but was easing up. The cloud bank magically gave way to the southern lights dancing above them, as though a blessing from the gods, giving them a better view of their visitor

The figure was clothed in red, and his headpiece glinted gold in the light of the torches. He looked like he was frantically looking around, searching for something or someone.

Katara recognized him. She knew who he was looking for.

There were so many thoughts in Katara’s head, so many memories that kept her rooted on the spot. There was a lump in her throat that refused to go away. The first time, she’d seen him on that pier, their tea dates, their fountain dates, their vigilante escapades, their non-sensical fights, the way he was so sweet towards children, his warmth, his smile, the fire in his eyes when he held her…

And the visibility was still poor as the figure walked out in front. But then, Katara was running forward towards him, not caring who saw and Zuko turned to see her and was running forward blindly as well. And they met in the centre, his arms coming around her and his warm breath hitting her face. He was shaking, she noticed and she hugged him tighter, to share some of her body heat.

“You weren’t well. Sokka said you weren’t well, I was so worried,” he whispered, his gravelly voice trembling. “I left as soon as I got his letter. Are you okay? Why are you out here? Why aren’t you resting? You should be indoors,” he said agitatedly, even as he patted her back, pulling her close. She could feel tears on her face, freezing as they landed and she couldn’t tell if they were his or hers.

“I was so worried, Tara. So worried, I could not just wait there for a letter. I’m sorry.”

 Oh, the irony. Once again, in a twisted turn of events, he’d never received her letters. They’d all gone to his office, but he’d left long before the first one telling him of the latest events.

Visibility was returning, but the storm was still loud enough to drown out their voices before reaching her tribesmen. Distantly she could hear Sokka call out, “Okay everyone, head back. Nothing to look at here.”

She pulled back, tears in her eyes as she looked into his. It was so easy to get lost in all that gold, she thought not for the first time and said, “I’m fine, Zuko. I’m – I’m pregnant. I wrote to you, but maybe you didn’t receive the letters..”

He stilled then. Completely froze up. The wind howled louder. The clouds broke up above and the lights danced.

“I’m- You’re – what now?” he asked, dumbfounded.

“I’m pregnant,” Katara repeated.

Zuko’s jaw dropped. He shut it again. And then opened it again. “With- with- with, my child?”

“Children. Twins, Firelord.” Katara said with a watery grin. “You were so fast and had such aim, even with all the measures we took, and-”

But she couldn’t complete that sentence because he was laughing and kissing her now, in public. In full view of all the Water Tribe warriors (or at least those who were unfortunately still around).

He was kissing her mouth, kissing her cheeks, her nose, everywhere he could. His tongue snaked in and she allowed it, tasting him again after so many months. He let go, to take another good look at her and Katara giggled, as she clung to him as well. And then suddenly, he was crying, worse than earlier. Big fat tears rolled down his face.  No matter how angry she’d been over the last month, this reaction more than made up for it. Now, she was very pleased that she’d been able to tell him the news in person.

“There, there you big softie,” she said, smoothing away his tears with the sleeves of her parka.

And Katara for the first time realised how poorly dressed he was to sustain himself in the winter of the South Pole, dressed in his traditional Fire Lord garb. She was about to comment on it, to tell Sokka to get them furs, when all of a sudden he was letting go and…

Dropping to one knee?

Katara looked at him, amazed. Her view had cleared completely - the snow had suddenly stopped swirling around them and she glanced sideways to see one of her students, making a shield above just the two of them to prevent any snow reaching them. Druk breathed fire and lit up the space, melting the snow around, even as the skies cleared up further and they could see the Southern lights shining above them. It felt like they were back in Ember Island – in that pavilion in the rain. A space just built for the two of them, separated in time and space. That time they’d danced together and he’d kissed her.

Except he wasn’t kissing her now. He was on one knee, tears still dripping from his face and pulling out a neat box from his inner pocket. And then he was speaking.

“I have another, new and improved proposition for you, Tara, Princess of the Southern Water Tribe. I planned to do this somewhere else, somewhere more romantic. I had it all planned and everything. But it can’t wait. I can’t wait a moment longer. Being apart from you is torture,” he said, laughing harshly. “We exchange rings in the Fire Nation, so that is what I have for you now, my love. But there is so much more I’m willing to give you. Everything I have, everything I am, is yours. It has always been yours and yours alone. There will be no one else. Will you give me the honour of becoming your husband?”

The wind was whistling again, the storm slowly letting up. Katara stood, shell shocked, trying to process what had just happened.

Perhaps she had waited too long, because Zuko had a stricken look on his face now, as he rambled on, “We can work this out. I promise. And if you want to stay here in your hometown longer than you want to stay with me, I understand. I may not be able to stay here with you for long periods because you know, I'm Firelord. I’m not sure how either, but we’ll make it work. You can stay home, I will come to you, my love. I will do anything, anything at all. Just marry me, choose me-”

“Shut up, Firelord,” was the only thing she managed to whisper through her daze. He promptly shut up, hand trembling, eyes teary. 

“Of course I will marry you.” She continued.

“You will?” he asked, unsure if he had heard right.

“Yes,” she replied, slowly coming back to herself. “Yes, YES, yes, yes!!” she screamed, loud enough that Kyoshi island probably heard. There was rustle of sound around them, but Katara wasn’t bothered as she held out her hand.

Zuko then broke out into the biggest grin, despite the tears in golden eyes which reflected all the colours shining above. He gently picked up her left hand and slid a silver band on it with a gem that gleamed with all the colours of the ocean on a tranquil day. But before she could admire it too much, he was getting up and kissing her again. And she kissed him back just as fiercely. It was a kiss filled with love and longing and the promise of a bright future. And then he was picking her up and twirling her around and she was laughing, head thrown back and the spirit seemed to be laughing with her as the colours danced and Zuko pulled her face down for another kiss.

They would have many more of these. These moments, these kisses.

A lifetime more.

“Katara of the Southern Water Tribe. Tara, my Tara….” He was saying, nearly incoherent, as he pulled back, grasping her face in his hands. “I’ll get you something more splendid to replace this,” he said – nudging at the now worn firelily comb in her hair. “My first wedding gift to you.”

“The ring works too, Zuko,” was the only thing she said.

“Hmm… he said, ignoring that. And we’ll work it out. I was serious. I’ll do whatever it takes. You can stay here if you want to. I know it’s your home after all.”

Katara just laughed at this, the sound dancing around them, with the now softly falling snow.

“You want me to stay closer to home?” she asked.  Zuko nodded, with a smile.

Katara pulled him closer, such that their foreheads were touching. The stars shined above them and for the first time, Katara voiced what she'd been thinking for a long time now. Through years of pondering what the word meant, years of staring up at the skies, looking for her North Star to steer her home. And she now had an answer. 

“But Zuko, my home is with you.”

Notes:

And with this we come full circle. Tbh I didn’t know where to draw the line with this chapter and what to schedule for possible side stories. Quite a bit of this fic is about Katara and Zuko wondering about the concept of home after the war. They feel that even though physically they are in the same place they called home earlier – it’s not quite the same. And here, at the end we have them finding a home in each other.
I think that I want to write sidestories. Maybe something about the wedding, something about the twins, something about Azula, something about how Zuko won the SWT over and cared for his wife… I don’t make any promises though. Well I think I’m definitely writing the last one, it’s too cute.
This story and the ZK fandom has been a great comfort to me in a time when I have been attempting to find the meaning of home myself. During the years I’ve written this, I’ve immigrated to a different country, changed houses thrice in three years, my family back home did as well. Hence I cannot fully draw this fic to a close as I try to find my own peace. It's an escape to write this and I will keep coming back to writing and this fandom when things get difficult.

About this chapter – I’ve mixed real medicine with a bit of fantasy medicine. I’ve found that when I read stories written by authors who have no understanding of these things, I feel most frustrated. But modern medicine might take the drama out of the story. Also, I’m firmly pro-choice. Which means that a woman should keep her pregnancy should she want to, and not if she doesn’t. I won’t accept discourse on this topic.

In this chapter, Zuko comes to Katara in the winter. Something Aang never did. It's symbolic that he will be with her through thick and thin. I've decided on rings, because I wouldn't want to replace Katara's old necklace.

Lots of love to all of you readers. Truly, thank you for reading this fic. Your comments and kudos have been a massive source of comfort and inspiration. I haven't replied to all the comments yet, but I've read each one and want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kind words.
- Sheera