Akaashi jostled awake gasping for air; small droplets clinging onto his eyelashes. Brain still muddled and unable to distinguish dream from reality, he felt a rush of panic in his chest, bile rising from his stomach, and his throat closing in on itself; The loneliness eating him up from the inside, triggering waves of uneasiness to crash into his whole body. Bokuto left and he’s all alone again.
But he then noticed the heavy arm around his waist, holding him dearly, tenderly, grounding him back to real life. His breathing gradually slowed as he clutched onto the familiar warmth to aid his escape from the depths of irrational fear; and once he was calm enough to do so, feeling it tighten to pull him against an even warmer chest. There was a faint whisper of ‘Are you okay, Keiji?’, and a gentle kiss on the back of his head, that helped drain the sadness that had slowly crept inside him through the visions of slumber.
He slowly turned to face the cause and remedy of his outburst, burrowing his way into the embrace that always made him feel safe. The steady heartbeats of his lover help regulate his own, till they became in synced, beating together as if they were a whole. Akaashi lifted his head to look at Bokuto, their hearts losing the shared rhythm as he became alarmed at the sadness in Bokuto’s eyes which mirrored his own. They both knew the source of his meltdown, already gotten accustomed to them from the years they’ve spent together. But the pain of knowing never went away with time; like a perfect beautiful rose that bloomed around their hearts, the prickling of its thorns something they had to adapt to.
So, Akaashi avoided the bitter truth by answering with a simple, “Nightmare.” Bokuto feigned ignorance as he attempted to kiss the pain away. He too, could not find it in him to broach the subject. It was too fragile, both harshly aware of the fact. And there was no helping it when no one was at fault; it couldn’t be helped that their careers kept them apart. Nevertheless, they still carried a shared guilt in their hearts, and sometimes it gnawed its way into their dreams, resulting in an incident just like this one.
Akaashi rolled on top of Bokuto without disconnecting their lips as they shared languid kisses, wanting to take it slow after a rough night. He had on Bokuto’s MSBY jersey that he’d taken directly from his boyfriend’s luggage when he arrived, his desire to be smothered with his boyfriend’s scent was strongest when they’ve just reunited; His lower half included. Akaashi had fallen asleep with Bokuto still inside of him, for he would start crying from shock if he felt empty so quickly. Bokuto pulled out only after confirming he was in deep sleep, then put Akaashi’s underwear back on and a pair of socks too for his cold feet, not bothering to clean up in fear of startling him awake again. He knew Akaashi doesn’t sleep as well when he wasn’t there to hold him, so Bokuto tried to not disrupt it as much as he can, settling to stare at the angelic face until he succumbed to slumber as well.
It must’ve been itchy for Akaashi, the evidence of last night having dried on his plush thighs, as he began rubbing his skin onto the covers covering Bokuto. Taking notice of it, Bokuto sat up and gently moved Akaashi out of his lap so he could leave to get a damp washcloth from their bathroom. The sudden separation caused Akaashi to kneel up in a panic, wanting to follow wherever Bokuto was heading to.
Bokuto dipped his head down to catch his lips in another lingering kiss, then whispered, “Just gonna get something to wipe you clean, baby. I’ll be back soon I promise.” And with that affirmation, Akaashi shoulders slumped back down to relax, and crawled himself to the edge of the bed to wait for his lover’s return.
Just like he promised, Bokuto came back in only a few seconds, leaving a peck on Akaashi’s forehead before bringing him back on his knees and rolling his underwear down to start lightly scrubbing away at the dried mixture of lube and come. Akaashi brought a hand behind him to intertwine with Bokuto’s free one, the fright he got from his dreams still loitering in his heart making him clingier than usual. He felt it being pulled to soft lips, a small gesture to reassure him that You’re not alone. Bokuto didn’t need to say it in words, Akaashi will always understand. He squeezed Bokuto’s hand to show his appreciation for being so patient and kind with him. It must not be easy to deal with Akaashi when he was being like this, but then he recalls the times Bokuto would always tell him, “Take what used to be terrifying and transform it into something fun.”
So instead of dwelling more on unreasonable worries — especially when Bokuto was right there within reach and vowed to never leave his side unless absolutely necessary — Akaashi took the washcloth from his grasp and let it fall to the floor, then grabbed onto the newly freed hand to place on his waist as he rocked his hips back against Bokuto’s groin. A small gasp left him when he felt Bokuto was already half-hard.
The hand on his waist raised to cup his cheek, and with gold staring into blue, Bokuto asked, “Are you sure?” Akaashi answered by giving him another kiss, fiercely this time, letting his desires shine through with every lick and bite; I’m always sure when it comes to you.
He pulled away in alarm at the sudden breach at his rim, then melted into the touch just as quickly. “You’re still soft from last night,” Bokuto mumbled against his neck, inhaling the fresh morning smell on his skin he claimed to be his favourite in the world. “I wish I could bottle it up and spray it on me all the time,” he’d said once when they lazed around in bed on a cold weekend morning. Akaashi thought he was crazy after taking a whiff of himself, noting how he reeked of nothing but stale sweat and sex. “There’s a distinct sweetness that only you have, Keiji,” he insisted with a light chuckle when he saw the confusion on Akaashi’s face. Akaashi accepted his defeat, fully aware of how much he wanted to be drenched in Bokuto’s scent himself.
Bokuto continued to whisper sweet nothings everywhere his lips could reach, prompting Akaashi to unconsciously spread his legs wider to accept more of him in. His usual dominant side turned docile during mornings like these, the longing to be filled by Bokuto overpowering any other instinct. He rocked his hips back onto the fingers that worked to spread him open, relishing in every teasing rub against his prostate, the gentle stimulation so intoxicatingly arousing it got him releasing indecent moans at 8 a.m. in the morning.
“Kou, I’m gonna—” His sentence cut off with a high-pitched whine when the fingers were abruptly removed. Bokuto’s fingers rubbed soothing circles on his hips, and his ears perked at the sound of a bottle cap being opened. He didn’t turn back to look but instead placed his palms on top of the hand still occupied in comforting him, as he braced himself for what was about to come.
Akaashi almost fell forward when Bokuto pushed in but the strong muscular arms around him kept him upright, those rough calloused fingers mapping his torso turning him into putty. When Bokuto finally bottomed out, he shivered at the sensations inside of him; Savouring the way he could feel every vein on Bokuto’s cock, every time it twitched as Akaashi clamped down, and how it spread heat to every inch of Akaashi’s body, warming him up even better than the sunlight that beamed through the window behind them. They stopped using condoms years ago when Bokuto first moved to Osaka; what with the desperate need to feel each other without anything getting in the way during their reunions. Plus, Akaashi liked having Bokuto’s come in him. Sometimes it would leak out unexpectedly while he was at work, and his face would burn as the memories of what had taken place in their kitchen that morning replayed in his mind.
When Bokuto started to move, Akaashi reached for his face with a trembling hand, wanting to gaze at his handsome boyfriend as he got lovingly pounded from behind. The moment their eyes met, the tears Akaashi had been holding back since he woke up began streaming down his face. It was like a dam broke, with Bokuto’s compassion being the catalyst. He wanted to stop, but he couldn’t. Not when he was being cherished with so much affection; Every touch, caress, stroke, and brush of skin dripping with adoration. A new rush of tears emerged when he noticed the clear liquid pooling in Bokuto’s eyes as well.
“Why are you crying, my love?” Bokuto whispered brokenly.
Akaashi choked out a sob at the sound of it. “Having you inside me is like a fantasy….”
Hearing that made Bokuto’s heart crack; The tears that threatened to fall at last did so as a few drops wet his cheeks. He hated being the reason for Akaashi’s melancholy. He hugged the pliant body closer to his, hoping that it will help shove all the sadness away, leaving space for only him. “I’m here, baby,” he pledged between kisses, “I’m here for you. Always.”
He took one of Akaashi’s hands and brought it down to touch where they were joined together. “Can you feel that, Keiji? Can you feel us moving together?” Akaashi bit his bottom lip while nodding. Bokuto kissed his tear-stained cheek, licking the salty water away as he said, “Let me give you more, baby. Let me love you till all you can feel is me. Will you let me?” Another choked sob left Akaashi’s lips, giving Bokuto his approval through more fervent nods.
And with that, Bokuto increased the intensity of his thrusts while retaining the same pace; Making sure Akaashi was fully engulfed with only him. Going too fast would distract Akaashi; keeping a steady slow rhythm leaves his sanity intact, the effective way in ensuring Akaashi’s whole focus was only on him.
With the emotionally-charged tension so high in the air, they both found release soon after. Akaashi came untouched with a silent scream, his toes curling and fingers stuck in Bokuto’s hair, while Bokuto reached his as he muffled his groan into Akaashi’s clothed shoulder, pulling his boyfriend impossibly deeper into his arms as he rode out his high, his semen dripping down the same thighs he cleaned moments ago.
His hold remained tight keeping Akaashi propped up and away from slumping down onto the sullied sheets. After catching his breath, he pulled out slowly, kissing his apologies for the oversensitivity, before grabbing the forgotten washcloth from the floor to hastily wipe up their mess — the sheets needed to be changed and they were gonna shower soon anyway — and finally turning Akaashi over and pushing him gently down onto his back on a clean spot on their bed. He followed shortly after putting their underwear back on, climbing onto his boyfriend and bringing him into his arms once more, as they sighed out ‘I love you’s and ‘I’ve missed you’s in between even more kisses.
“You okay?” Bokuto asked after a while, his brows furrowing as the worry returned to his face.
“I’m okay now.” At long last, Akaashi smiled. The first genuine one since they woke up. Seeing it, Bokuto could now allow his heart to settle down.