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Save You from Yourself

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Bam had always hated what he was; a nephalem, a halfbreed between an angel and a demon. 

 

He hated fighting, would always try and reason with an opponent if he thought he could get away with it. Demons and humans and hunters and angels alike. People regarded him as someone strong enough to take down the most powerful demon who ruled these lands and plenty hoped he would take his place. 

 

He hated that people called him a God. He wasn’t one. Would never be. With the battles he fought getting harder, he’d become a Hell Lord before he ever became a God. That scared him more than taking the throne of a tyrant.

 

Bam had gained so many friends. Lost just as many. Swore himself to save everyone he could. 

 

Yet as he gathered people as he crossed this terrorized land, Khun Aguero Agins often wondered. If Bam was, excuse the term, hell-bent on saving anyone he could...who was there to save Bam? From other people, but most importantly...himself?

 

So Khun had made a vow.

 

He made this vow seven years ago, to go through Hell and High Water. To dirty his hands where Bam would not, could not. To be evil and conniving, dastardly and vicious. 

 

All for Bam. 

 

Khun had said it to his face, too, and Bam had only given him that smile of his that made Khun’s heart squeeze. Not the sunshine smile, the vow had been too serious, but the one that made Khun know Bam understood and was there for him. 

 

Bam was always there for him.

 

Then he wasn’t .

 

Khun had lost him over the edge of a massive cliff, betrayed by someone they called friend. He’d very nearly shoved her off, too, but as one last act, because Bam would not want that, he let her go.

 

He’d come to regret it later, he knew that, but it was for Bam.

 

Everything he did was for Bam and if that meant continuing this journey with the ragtag group of friends he’d made, then he would do that and take down the demon himself .

 

Before he did, though, he screamed in the forest until his throat was raw and the tears stopped.

 


Then Bam was back. Hallow-eyed and sad and it nearly broke Khun’s heart all over again. He went by Viole for a while, but over time the smile came back. The light returned.

 

Khun had never been so happy to see the sunshine smile on Bam’s face again, and had reaffirmed the vow. Nothing had changed. Nothing would change. Viole was Bam and Bam was Bam. Nothing more or less than the boy he gave his heart and soul to, because Bam had saved him like he’d saved everyone else. Only no one seemed to be as driven as Khun was to keep his spirit alive. To make sure Bam was able to keep going. 

 

No one else seemed to love Bam as much as Khun did, and that thought alone, that he loved him had shaken Khun to his very core. 

 

Khun didn’t love people. 

 

He cared for Bam’s friends, could even consider some of them friends, but he didn’t love them . His heart was too frozen for that. Yet that sunshine smile had pierced and melted right through the ice and he hadn’t even realized it. Didn’t know when it happened, just knew that when he made the connection, it was the strongest feeling he’d ever had.

 

It scared him.

 

Khun had sat in his room that night, silent saved for quiet sniffs and gasps of air as he cried. He’d only cried like this after Bam had ‘died’ but this…now he was terrified of losing him for a whole different reason. Bam had ignored any and all moves made by women, but had no signs of liking men, either. 

 

The only thing he could go off of was the fact Bam was near him any chance he got. It wasn’t enough. Nothing his overactive mind could go through was enough. Bam’s eager eyes, like a puppy, asking for permission to do things. Always asking Khun if he did well after a fight, fussing over Khun when he was hurt in a way he didn’t do for the others. Bam had to know Khun would do anything for him, but Khun never felt like he was being abused for it. Sometimes Bam just...did things anyway without looking to him for advice. 

 

A knock at his door made Khun freeze up and suck in a stuttering breath. ‘Go away…’ he begged and closed his eyes. Please let them think he was asleep…

 

“Khun…?” Bam’s voice filtered through, hesitant.

 

Fuck

 

“I heard you crying, I know you’re not asleep-”

 

“I’m okay, Bam.” Khun called, hating how wrecked his voice really sounded. He and Bam tended to sleep in the same room these days, but he’d needed to be alone to get these feelings out. “You don’t need to worry about me.”

 

“I always worry about you.” Bam was defiant. Of course he was. Yet even as he spoke he didn’t open the door. There was silence for a long while before a light thunk on the other side. Had he...bumped his head on it? “You can talk to me...you always let me talk to you. Why won’t you...let me do the same?”

 

Goddamn it, the way Bam’s voice sounded so hurt made Khun dig the heels of his palms into his eyes. He hated being the one that hurt him. “Please, Bam...I said I’m fine.”

 

“If I could bond you we wouldn’t have this problem…” it was a mutter, and if it wasn’t for Khun’s elven ears he wouldn’t have heard it at all. His head snapped towards the door, but there was already the sound of footsteps as Bam walked away. Bam sometimes forgot he had good hearing. He wasn’t meant to hear that and Khun knew it. 

 

It made everything worse .

 

Bond him? What could he mean by bond him ? He knew weres did it. Wangnan and Yihwa were bonded. Was it because of his demon side? Khun knew about mating, but a bond mark wasn’t always involved. A bond between two people was permanent. It meant sealing energies together in a tie that could cross oceans. Sealing souls in some cases. Bonds could be forced and be one-sided, a way to control someone, but it was temporary. Both parties had to consent to it. Both had to want it. 

 

It also meant if one of the bonded died it could possibly kill the other. Death by heartbreak was common among all races, but death because of a bond mark snapping was agonizing. Khun never understood why someone would subject themselves to that. Yet once he heard it from Bam, he spent the next couple weeks really observing and watching the werebull and nymph, asking questions far enough apart and made sure it sounded out of curiosity or dismissing their suspicion by saying he was making sure nothing was going to go south. 

 

Wangnan had shared his magic with Yihwa in order for her to be able to bite him back, since she was a fire nymph and it wasn’t natural. Ever since they mated, Khun did notice the way they fought together significantly improved. They barely had to say things to each other to know if the other was alright or coordinating. Less worried glances and more mischievous grins and thumbs-up. Khun knew some bonds included mind-reading, but did they have that or was it more instinctual? Wangnan had described it as everything 'snapping into place'.

 

It drove Khun even more insane. 

 

Did Bam want that with him? Did he really want that forever binding tie to their souls? Their energy? Their lives ?

 

Khun didn’t want to think about what it meant but his own mind was traitorous. 

 

Did Bam love him back?

 

If he did...was Khun willing to...give that to Bam? He’d promised him to be there for him through thick and thin already...could he? Tie himself to someone forever? In a more permanent way than marriage?

 

He gave everything to Bam. Bent over backward for him. Bled and fought and schemed for him. Part of him wondered why he was so hesitant. He had already vowed, hadn't he? To be beside him anyway? What was the difference adding a Bond to the matter? Khun couldn't say he was afraid of commitment, since that is what the vow was. A deep promise he intended to keep and he didn't make promises lightly.

 

Khun came to a decision a couple months after he heard Bam's whisper. If Bam wanted this with him, then he would not back down from it. He wouldn't bring it up, but Khun set out to try and test the waters. A subtle test. More flirty banter if the moment presented itself. Sleeping in the same room again, even if it meant a double bed instead of two singles. Touching. Lightly across the arms or brushing their hands together, in his hair or down his back. It warmed his chest to see Bam lighting up, the sun finally coming out after being behind the clouds for weeks on end. Khun hadn't even realized Bam had been giving him his space, nor that he missed him as much as Bam clearly missed him back and felt terrible for it, but grateful all the same. It was silly, considering they had been right there within arm's reach but Khun had been in his own world.

 

Khun started to notice something as time progressed and they fell right back into their rhythm, not paying any mind the hiccup even happened. While Khun started courting him; started taking him out on the town just the two of them, buying him new clothes and trinkets they could attach to their bags, Bam was starting to do his own thing. More portions of the food he made, double checking his tent was secure or even building it for him then waiting for Khun's approval. Asking what was wanted for food before he hunted, bringing back rabbit for Khun if he'd said it then as deer for the others. 

 

It made Khun wonder...if he had been blind to everything Bam did for him before. Now that he was looking at it all through a new lense, everything Bam did seemed...painfully obvious. 

 

Khun was so, so blind and stupid. 

 

Bam had loved him all along, he just showed it differently.

 


They were travelling through some really thick forest when something strange happened. Shibisu, Hatz, and Endorsi disappeared. Left them a note with stupid hearts on it telling him he’d be back soon.

 

It pissed Khun off. Two of their best scouts plus the fairy that could teleport . What the fuck? Without even talking to him or anyone about it? They had to push on without them. Khun just hoped they knew what they were bloody doing.

 

Bam, strangely, wasn’t too upset by it. He hoped they’d be okay of course, but didn’t fret. Usually he’d be worried about their well being, it was just in his nature. It made Khun wonder if he was in on something, but those golden eyes didn’t hold a glimmer of dishonesty when he told him he didn’t know what they were up to. So Khun let it be. They could do what they wanted.

 

Deeper into the forest they went. It was going to take days, Khun was sure of it. He didn’t like the way he felt like he was being watched, either. It made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. 

 

Eventually, Khun noticed Bam was starting to toss and turn in his sleep. Would even throw his shirt off and would be covered in sweat. It worried Khun. Was there a mental attack on him? Was it the forest? Bam woke up completely fine, though, and every time he asked he would be dismissed or the subject would change. 

 

One day, Khun froze in the middle of cooking as he felt a nose at the back of his neck. He would’ve whirled around and stabbed the person if it wasn’t for it being Bam’s purr that he heard. Khun was frozen in his stirring, not sure what to do at all. 

 

Then it was gone and Khun could breathe again, but Bam had disappeared. It was like he’d been in suspension, but it was his own violation that kept him in place. He shook it off, and finished supper. None of the others said anything…

 

Until one of them did.

 

He was setting up his tent, Bam still nowhere in sight, when Wangnan of all people walked up to him.

 

“Permission to speak plainly?” Wangnan drawled. Khun wanted to stab him just for his tone.

 

“I’m not a fucking noble, haven’t been for a long time,” Khun spat instead, “You can speak your mind, Wangnan.”

 

“You’re a fucking idiot.”

 

That brought him to a screeching halt. Khun sputtered, “W-What? Excuse me ?”

 

“I said you’re a fucking idiot .” Wangnan stressed. His expression and the way he stood with one hip popped and one hand buried in his pants pocket casually didn’t change. “You were asking all sorts of questions months ago and here I thought you were trying to get with ‘Ole. So you spent all that time asking me and Yihwa stuff but you didn’t put in any damn research while we were still in the towns where you had access to a library?” 

 

Khun’s brows furrowed tightly, a scowl on his face, “What the hell are you talking about?”

 

“About mating bonds, you dumb fuck.” Wangnan narrowed his eyes. “What it means for demons and weres. You’ve been courting him, in your way and in his. You didn’t notice a thing, did you?”

 

“Out with it then!” Khun waved his hand towards him, long nails making a slashing motion upwards, but Wangnan didn’t flinch, “If you’re coming to bitch at me then what the hell did I miss that was so fucking important?!”

 

“Shelter. Provision. Strength.” Wangnan listed each with their own emphasis. “To show all these to a were you’re interested in or a demon means courting us. It’s not the same as your kind of courting. You tick all the boxes, Khun. You and ‘Ole shelter each other all the time. He makes your tent for you and has you double check it. When you make it he looks it over until he’s satisfied. You sleep in the same room you pay for . You two cook for each other. He hunts for you. Gets you things you specifically want for food to show that he can. Strength? Goddamn do I even need to explain that one ? You two nearly die for each other on a regular basis - that’s a joke, but honestly yeah you two still self-sacrifice and get hurt one way or another.” 

 

“Alright then, fine. I get it. I was doing things for him on a subconscious level. Why in the bloody fucking hell are you mad at me for it ?” Khun huffed, exasperated. It all made sense, it really did. So was that why Bam sniffed him earlier?

 

Apparently, with Wangnan’s next words, no. No it was not.

 

“He’s having his first cycle. Since he’s a nephalem, I don’t know if it's heat or a rut. He’s never attached himself so strongly to anyone enough to trigger it. Not from what I can tell. You two revolve around each other like the moon and sun.” Wangnan waved his hand towards him, sighing deeply. “He doesn’t...really know it, either. I could tell as I asked him things and he shook his head yes or no, dumbfounded by it. So I...was the one who sent Shibisu and the others off.”

 

“You did what ?” Khun was back to fuming and he took a step towards him.

 

Wangnan had the decency to hold his hands up, finally moving from the position he’d been holding. “It’s for ‘Ole, okay?!” He frowned at him, “I sent them to see if they could find a cabin in these god forsaken woods. Somewhere, anywhere. ‘Ole going into a cycle in a town would be awful for everyone involved. So I wanted them to find an abandoned cabin or something that way we could get ‘Ole privacy . So I could explain to him what’s going on with his body. Why he’s waking up sweaty in the middle of the night. All that stuff. I was...hoping they’d be back by now. Shibisu was the only one I could tell that’s one of ‘Ole’s best friends and he wouldn’t be weird with it. Hatz and Endorsi care for him just as much to do this for him, too.” He rubbed his neck below his horns, “I just...wanted you to see what you were doing to him. I wanted you to know. I wanted to see what your reaction would be. Do you want to be with ‘Ole? Like how Yihwa and I are? Or are you just...his friend?”

 

Khun hated that he was being asked this question. Here in camp no less. For all he knew, Bam was listening and Wangnan was being his scapegoat or something. He didn’t want to out himself like this. “I am his friend regardless. You can be in a relationship and be friends. I was trying to court Bam my way, yes. I don’t know about being with him like you and Yeon.” A lie, the last one. He did know he wanted to Bond with Bam. It was why he started courting him. That was too much information to divulge. Not like this. “Now leave me alone. Now that I know about the cabin, perhaps we can all start looking for one. Do you know where Bam is?”

 

“He...didn’t come back for supper, did he?” Wangnan’s brows furrowed. 

 

What was he playing at? “No. No he didn’t.”

 

“Fuck.” 

 

Khun really, really didn’t like that.

 


Camp had to be abandoned.

 

They packed what they could but ultimately left a lot of things behind, trying to look for Bam. Khun’s Enna Core was light for himself and a couple others, the three spread out as far as he was able. It was awful they were running around after dark looking for their nehalem. Where could he have gone? How could anyone have captured him if he had been? Khun hadn’t even felt a blip on his radar. Hadn’t heard a sound . Wangnan hadn’t caught a whiff of anything unusual.

 

If they got in a fight here in these woods, Yihwa wasn’t going to be able to help or she’d start a forest fire.

 

Dan was using Miseng’s observer as his guide as he ran around, searching for traps. Prince stuck by Miseng himself to give her light and keep her safe. Goseng and Horyang did their best looking for anything out of the ordinary. Anaak was using her night vision to run and Ran was hot at her heels.

 

Khun’s heart was pounding in his pointed ears. Where was Bam?  

 

A thought crossed his mind, completely unbidden but he couldn’t deny it’s truth.

 

If he was Bonded to Bam, he would be able to feel him. No matter where he was.

 

Ultimately, they regrouped with their hands empty, and Khun was cursing. They had to move forward. Maybe they’d be able to hear something about where Bam was or who had him. So they trucked on, tired from their adrenaline rush and no sleep. 

 

First light was when all hell broke loose. 

 

“Look!” Miseng had called, “It’s Endorsi!”

 

Sure enough, the fairy was speeding towards them like a rocket. She stopped above them with a burst of pink energy, “No time to talk gotta-” there was an explosion and she held her arm up as wind from it blew by. “Fuck! Everybody hang on!”

 

They didn’t even have time to ask if it was Bam. A pink ball surrounded them and then they plopped from one space of existence, and plopped into another, if a little unceremoniously. Endorsi drooped down to the ground, knees in the dirt, heaving hard. 

 

They were in a blown-out clearing...with Bam in the center of it.

 

Khun had never been so...attracted to and terrified of Bam in his life .

 

His eyes were burning amber, teeth lengthened and barred, nails longer and sharper than Khun ever kept his own. His shoulder-length hair was out of its tie, whipping around behind him due to his energy alone. Chest rising and falling as he took deep growling breaths. He never looked at them. Kept his eyes only on the mop of yellow hair in front of him and Khun felt his veins go cold.

 

Rachel.

 

She gave a maniacal laugh, as if she didn’t know the danger she was in. “Oh, that’s so cute, Bam!” She cooed. It made Khun’s stomach curl. Her voice...it made him want to vomit. “You got so riled up just from me calling that blue haired bastard ugly and annoying ! From me saying I wanted to slit his throat, watch him bleed. Maybe he’d be prettier that way. You care that much for him? What a joke! What makes you want him so badly?! Why’d you toss me away for him, huh?! For them?! What do they have that I don’t, huh?!”

 

“You pushed me off the cliff because you didn’t want me!” Bam slashed his hand through the air, “You taught me not to betray people! Why did you betray me? You were my friend!”

 

“I was supposed to be more than that, you imbecile!” Rachel screamed back, getting to her feet. “You’re in fucking rut because of that guy ! You were supposed to be mine! No one else’s! My mate! My Bond!”

 

“You could never be my mate!” Bam snapped, “I would never mate someone who stabbed me in the back! I could never be Bonded to someone so poisonous!”

 

Poisonous ?!” Rachel laughed again, “You could never have children with him, you know! If you mate and Bond him, that’ll poison everything you have!”

 

Khun recoiled and choked. That was right. They couldn’t…He’d never be able to give that to Bam.

 

“I don’t want to pass on this cursed blood of mine, anyway!” Bam dismissed.

 

“Oh yeah?! What if he wants it?” Rachel sneered. 

 

“If he wants it,” Bam was slow, voice dangerously low, “Then we’ll figure something out. We always do. Nothing you have to say will sway me, Rachel.”

 

A devilish grin nearly split Rachel’s face in two and her pixie nature showed in the way her eyes glowed and turned to slits, “What if he doesn’t want you? In your darkest hour? What if he rejects your Bond?”

 

The air went silent . Cold. Deafening. Suffocating. 

 

They didn’t have time to react; they were so stunned into silence that Rachel was able to reel her hands back and send a cloud of magic and powder towards Bam. He was caught off guard enough he breathed some in before he was able to cover his nose and mouth, eyes huge. 

 

Khun was running before he could stop himself. Bam was in trouble. The cloud hadn't even dispersed and maybe he ran through it. Maybe he breathed some in. It didn't matter. The pixie bitch was running and Khun wasn't going to let her disappear this time. 

 

Hatz came out of nowhere and caught her in the front by her arms a little ways into the forest. Good. Khun was slipping Heavenly Mirror from his sleeve but he wasn't going for the heart. 

 

He caught her from behind, hand wrapping around her throat, "You thought I'd look prettier covered in blood, did you?" He cooed in her ear. He felt her shiver and he pressed the blade to her skin. "How about yours?"

 


Bam hadn't moved when Khun came back. No one had gone toward him. Wangnan was clearly arguing with someone about it but all Khun could focus on was Bam. Hatz came from behind him and beelined for Endorsi. Bam was...an autumn leaf in a strong wind, trying to hold onto its branch with all it had. 

 

"Bam…" Khun held his hands up. He'd at least taken the chance to wipe some of the blood from his hands on the grass. Bam wasn't looking at him. His stomach twisted. "Do you hate me for killing her?" At last, Bam moved by shaking his head. He still had his hands over his face and was starting to double over. "Bam? Bam, talk to me!" Khun was growing increasingly concerned. What had that cloud been? He and Hatz had asked her, but Rachel hadn't told them. Until her dying breath refused to. 

 

Then Shibisu appeared.

 

"Fucking hell what happened here?!" Shibisu stared around them. "I was drawn because of Bam's energy blast, but shit-"

 

"Isu, no time! The cabin, is it ready?!" Hatz cut him off.

 

"Yes! Khun-whoa!" Shibisu jumped back, "Guys!"

 

Khun had gotten too close to Bam, tried to touch him, to soothe him. It backfired and now he was on his back. Perhaps it was instinct, but Khun translated 'mate' to wolf and for some reason or another. Flipping them both around he pressed his own hands around Bam's jaw and upper mouth like he was grabbing an animal's muzzle and clacked his teeth. "Stop. No." He got lucky and he knew it when Bam fought for a second, even pressed his hips up, and then went pliant beneath him.

 

A temporary solution. Khun knew as he saw literal black taking over Bam's scraela he would have to act fast. Glancing back up at Shibisu he grunted, "Where?"

 

"Bam," Shibisu called instead. A tilt of his head was his acknowledgement, "Follow my scent back the way I came. Can you do that?"

 

"You can take me with you, Bam." Khun promised. 

 

"Khun, wait! You don't know-" Wangnan tried.

 

Khun didn't make promises lightly, and besides. Bam was scooping him up and zooming off anyway. Wangnan didn't even stand a chance.

Chapter Text

Not wanting to risk ripped clothes, Khun started undoing his belt and trousers ahead of time as well as the ties of his tunic. Reaching for Bam's tunic he noticed how his eyes were almost black with the burning embers of his eyes in the middle. There was only a hint of white left around the irises, and Khun knew he was trying so hard.

 

Khun could also start to feel his body getting hot, but he tried not to squirm. To hold onto Bam until they got to the cabin. What had been in that powder? An aphrodisiac? Something more powerful? As a member of the Khun family, he fancied himself fairly immune to most poisons. That included powder forms. This was much different and he'd only been in it for a second. If Bam hadn't moved and took a much bigger amount than him from the initial blast? Khun felt his heart go out to Bam. He must be suffering so much. It made Khun grit his teeth.

 

Besides the obvious letting Bam fuck him, Khun didn't know what to do for him. He hoped with time it would be enough. He prayed it wouldn't take too long. He could handle a couple hours…

 

However, it wasn't until Bam was suddenly kicking in the door of the cabin, startling him, that the reality of this set in. Bam was going to fuck him and as Bam searched the place without putting him down Khun had a moment of panic. Bam was going on instinct right now. Wangnan had said Bam had never been through a cycle before. Rachel had called it a rut. 

 

Darkest hour .

 

Khun had to think and think fast as the bedroom, surprisingly tidy and free of dust, was found. There was no more white of his eyes. The normally golden circles he loved so dearly was swallowed by black too as the pupils were blown out. All that was left staring back at him were thin glowing amber rings. 

 

It terrified him, at the same time it made his body throb

 

A growl startled Khun and he was unceremoniously dropped onto the mattress. He threw off his tunic as he felt clawed hands grip at his trousers and yank , his boots thunking on the floor when the traction was stopped. Okay, well, he could handle a few puncture holes but thankfully they hadn't ripped too much. His legs did sting a little from the scratches left behind.

 

Maybe he should have listened to Wangnan.

 

As clawed hands reached for his underwear Khun jumped forward and grabbed at Bam's tunic. Just a little more time! He couldn't let Bam rip him apart literally . Bam would never forgive himself! If Bam felt guilty about things he shut down and caved in on himself. Khun couldn't let him do that. Couldn't risk Bam pulling away from him. Not when they got so far…

 

A touch to his cheek, freezing him in place.

 

"Pretty…" it was a purr, possessive sounding. Bam’s voice was different, almost two-toned.

 

A click in his brain .

 

"Yes," Khun breathed, 'Please, pleasepleaseplease…' "I'm your pretty, right? Pretty mate?" He had wanted it, but not like this

 

"Pretty mate...my pretty…" a confirmation, if a bit dazed. 

 

Khun latched onto the information like a lifeline . He took the moment he was given to shove off his underwear and get completely naked, then tugged Bam's tunic off, trousers and underwear in one swoop. 

 

When Bam's dick nearly hit him in the face, Khun felt his stomach drop while his own cock jumped. 

 

They had bathed together in inns and springs, ponds, lakes and waterfalls. They'd seen each other naked countless times. Yet he'd never once seen Bam as rock solid as this, girthy with a pleasant amount of length and leaking precum. It made him gulp and he gave the crown of the angry red shaft a kitten lick. Their moans filled the air and Khun gasped when his hair was grabbed. Shoving his own fingers in his mouth before Bam could force his cock down his throat, Khun looked up at Bam when his dick was deflected and went across his cheek instead.

 

To Khun's fortune, the sight must have pleased the beast looming over him because Khun's sharp ears picked up on the way his breathing changed. Deep, rumbling in his chest so hard Khun could visibly see it. Fangs and pointed teeth showed as his mouth was hanging open, embers smoldering in his half lidded gaze.

 

To Khun, Bam may be a beast right now, but he would always be a blazing vision of beauty. 

 

Khun got his fingers as slicked as possible, keeping eye-contact with Bam and gave him a show for it while he rocked his length against his cheek. If he could keep Bam enchanted, he would. When he was satisfied with how wet his hand was, even making sure extra spit collected in his palm, he reached behind himself and caught Bam’s shaft in his mouth in one motion. He didn’t have time to do this slowly, so he teased his rim while smoothing his lips and tongue up and down the skin of Bam’s cock. Once his body was relaxed enough and Bam’s breathing got heavier, he pushed both fingers in while taking in the cockhead. 

 

He was able to swirl his tongue around it, taste the precum that made his body throb, and pump his fingers about two times before Bam’s fingers still in his hair shoved him down further while thrusting in. Khun did his absolute best not to choke, breathing through his nose and relaxing his throat. His strength was no match for Bam’s, so he just kept his hand at the base as a buffer until he was ready for deeper, not caring if the force bruised his lips. Anything for a distraction right now, and he went as far as to start a rhythm, matching Bam’s pounding with how he moved his fingers. 

 

It set his nerves on fire and he whimpered, the sound muffled but the vibrations making those rocking hips stutter. He was hot, sweating at his neck and they’d barely started anything. It had to be that goddamn powder. Bam’s skin was tasteless at first but the stretch and weight of it had Khun’s mind going hazy, and when more precum leaked out with the stray strokes of his other hand, an unbidden moan came from him. It tasted so good. Bam tasted good and he let his hand fall away, shoving his fingers all the way in while those hips slammed forward and held for a moment. 

 

Hearing Bam’s guttural goan in his sensitive ears made Khun’s eyes roll back and his lashes flutter as he closed them. That sound was everything right now. The way his head burned and throbbed from the hair-pulling added to the sensation and Khun couldn’t help the way his hips rolled into the air. No, no, if he came just from getting face-fucked he’d be too sensitive to take him and he was lucky to even be where he was. So Khun willed himself to focus on Bam. Kept his free hand on the other’s hip to steady himself. 

 

“Pretty...my pretty…” Bam’s voice was gravelly, and Khun’s eyes opened when he felt the touch of Bam’s other hand on his face. It was gentle in spite of the rough way he was thrusting, taking over Khun’s mouth. It made Khun’s heart stutter in his chest. Why? How? Sapphires met topaz and Khun could only think that somewhere passed the raging beast Bam’s adoration for him was enough to touch him this way. 

 

‘Don’t make me cry, Bam…’ Khun had to flex his throat so it wouldn’t tighten with emotions, but when he tried to look away Bam brought his gaze back. When he tried to close them a claw tapped at his temple like a warning. Was Bam aware? At all? Gods, his fingers hadn’t been able to keep up with the pace so Khun had focused instead on stretching and trying to add a third, but there hadn’t been enough spit for that. 

 

Then Bam’s cock started pulsing and the rhythm he had was faltering. Honestly? Khun was surprised the signs didn’t show themselves sooner. He moaned encouragingly, rubbing his tongue along the underside and that made Bam’s hips stutter. The grunts and moans above him were becoming erratic. Would this be enough to get Bam back? If only for a moment? Would it make it worse? He flexed his throat on purpose and that’s what did it, the constriction. 

 

Bam buried himself until Khun’s nose was flush with dark brown pubic hair, pushed as far as he could and the wail that Khun heard was as inhuman as could be, but it made his nails dig into Bam’s hip. The coil in his gut snapped right along with him as his mouth was flooded with thick spurts. No, no, no, his body was clamping around his fingers and it was all Khun could do to hold on with the tremors and waves of pleasure in his system. He had to swallow, there was no choice. 

 

He couldn’t believe he came untouched and only from this

 

Dazed, mind sluggish as Bam pulled out of his mouth, Khun flinched a little by reflex as a stray burst hit his cheek, the same one from earlier. Lips tingling from the abuse, Khun looked up at Bam who...looked about the same only breathing harder. It made him...disappointed. Sad. He didn’t want their first time like this. 

 

He hadn’t even gotten to kiss him.

 

Khun’s body was pliant as Bam shoved him back onto the bed and climbed up after him after kicking his boots and trousers free. Khun’s hand had slipped out during his own orgasm, and his head lulled to the side, letting his body go limp and ready for whatever Bam had in store for him. 

 

Something glimmered in his vision.

 

Was that…? A bottle on the bedside table?

 

Khun’s head snapped up, sobering for a moment as he snatched for it. It was new. A bottle of oil .

 

He was going to have to really, really thank Wangnan, Shibisu, Hatz and Endorsi for this. 

 

Then his brain short-circuited again as he felt Bam... licking him

 

Not his cock, though Khun was surprised he even had a semi-hard on still. No, Bam was...licking his ear . It made Khun whine, then hiss as Bam’s claws bit into the skin of his hips. That tongue traced the shell of his ear and then the sharp teeth were carefully nibbling on it. Khun took the moment of reprieve, not questioning why he was getting lavished with attention. For all he knew the desperate need for something was abated. When Bam sucked at the tip of his ear, though, Khun arched into the solid body above him, keening in surprise. Ah, oh...his veins still felt like they were filled with liquid fire, and he felt his loins stirring again with a low-simmering heat. 

 

Popping the top off the oil, Khun spread some on his hand. Bam was moving from his ear after giving a low, pleased-sounding hum at his reactions and now was at his neck. Tracing along his pulse and Khun shivered at the scrape of teeth. Would he…? Then to his collarbone, adding nibbles to it that made Khun tremble. Then down his chest. Khun breathed in relief, glad he wasn’t going to mark him with the mating bond, but he did jump and a surprised shout was pulled from his throat when he felt the teeth sink into him anyway. Marking him, claiming him, but not bonding. Not yet, he was sure. 

 

While Bam was distracted lapping at his blood, Khun reached down and re-slicked his rim, whimpering as he pushed three fingers in and Bam bit at him again, this time on his other pectoral. Khun gasped and threw his head back as his nipple got attention now, and felt the other man’s solid cock rutting against his thigh. Shifting, pushing his chest into the other’s mouth, hoping he’d get the hint, Khun pumped a few times to get used to the feeling and then pulled his oil slicked hand from himself and poured a little bit more. Reaching for Bam, his stomach and heart did somersaults at how he fit in his grip. The weight in his hand was different this way than it had been on his tongue. It was the other man’s turn to whine this time and it sent a thrill through Khun’s veins. Capping the bottle using some basic magic control he put it back where it had come from.

 

Khun expected his touch to send Bam into a frenzy, feeling him thrusting into his hand, but he was met with glaring ember and black slits and Bam’s hands that had been roaming and holding him took both of Khun’s and slammed them onto the bed with a growl that made the blue haired man’s dick jump. It was supposed to be threatening, but all it did was make him choke on his own air and his body hotter. The sweat wasn’t just on his neck or temples now; he felt his back sticking to the bed in places. 

 

“Mine. My mate.” Bam snapped his teeth at him, dual-tone still in full effect. Khun reflexively clacked his teeth back which made the brunet blink at him slowly.

 

“Pretty mate, yes,” Khun told him simply, voice rough from the abuse of his throat, and laid pliant again. When he didn’t move and Bam was satisfied, he was released and Khun’s heart rate went through the roof when Bam just...kept licking across his body. What was he up to? Wasn’t this supposed to be a rut triggered and made worse by the damn powder? Wasn’t he supposed to fuck him? Bam was still clearly in ‘demon mode’ but besides the simplified speech and terms the way he touched him made Khun squirm . He kept his hands where Bam had put them, fisting the sheets and hissing and jerking whenever the brunet found a new place to bite . It hurt, yes, but...it made Khun start panting and moaning like he was being shocked with electricity each time. His toes curled and he moaned when one was sunk into his hip, “Bam...Bam, please…” he couldn’t take the anticipation anymore. He just wanted Bam to fuck him, use him, because that’s what he needed, right? He was prepped, he was ready. He could take the bites and the scratches; he’d been through so much worse and had scars to show for it. 

 

Khun nearly had a heart attack when Bam’s tongue stroked along his cock .

 

“Bam! Bam, no, don’t!” Khun lurched up, hands flying to those soft locks and pushed at him, “Take me, take me I know you need it. I know you want to. Take me, Bam,” he pleaded.

 

Bam released a vicious sounding snarl and pried Khun’s hands away and back onto the bed, and Khun choked on his own air as he felt magic keeping him in place. It was a simple water lock, the bed wasn’t even damaged, but Khun couldn’t pry them free with strength alone. Bam's magic was different from his own; he could break something so simple with time and focus but he had neither. He was shoved back down and for a flash of a second as his ass was grabbed and lifted up, his feet barely touching the sheets below, Khun thought he was going to get what he asked for. 

 

He was denied.

 

Instead, Khun’s groin had a new flash of heat as his ass cheeks were spread open, followed by a wicked twist in his gut as there was a... long swipe of tongue across his twitching hole. Far longer than it should be .

 

“B-Bam?” Khun gasped, eyes huge and blue oceans looked up into an inferno. Bam held his gaze as he poked the tip of his tongue to the rim and then slipped it inside. Further. Further , and...oh gods, Khun’s eyes rolled back with a long groan. His hips canted in the air as his dick visibly twitched, precum smearing on his stomach from the downward angle. 

 

He didn’t know Bam could do that .

 

“Bam... Bam !” Khun was writhing on the bed, unable to move his arms and he could feel it , he could feel Bam’s tongue moving inside him with the smallest of in-out movements to massage the rim. “Fuck! Fuckfuckfuck-” he couldn’t breathe. He was panting so hard he was getting dizzy and Bam’s grip shifted, hiking his thighs onto his shoulders and maybe after this Khun would be embarrassed by the sounds he was currently making. Whining, keening, needy sounds. His hair was a mess with how he tossed his head back and forth, and he could feel it sticking to his forehead. 

 

A sudden shockwave had Khun arching his back and crying out.

 

The movement stopped and Khun blinked through bleary eyes, forcing the glossiness to dissipate so he could look at the beast taking what he wanted. Bam stared back at him, taken off guard by his reaction.

 

When it started again Khun tensed, feeling the tingling through his legs and the tips of his fingers. He arched again and it wasn’t as harsh as the first time. The third had him squirming again. Bam had obviously found something worth note and was going to abuse it . Sharp claws made bloody indents in his thighs but Khun didn’t even feel the sting of it. The more the nephalem tortured his prize, the more Khun was getting delirious. 

 

“Bam, BamBamBamBam…” Khun chanted, wound tight, so tight and he felt the prick of tears in his eyes. “ Please …” His dick was so hard it hurt but he didn’t think he could cum untouched again. He was pretty sure the first time was due to whatever was in his system heightening everything. 

 

Bam's hand had moved from his thigh to smooth along his hip, tease across the V of it, and Khun shook as his cock throbbed hard in Bam's grip. All it took was a low purr, a flick of his devil tongue against that spot, and a thumb across the slit of his cockhead.

 

A scream tore from his throat and echoed across the halls of the cabin. 

 

His entire body locked up and Khun swore he nearly broke his back with how sharply he arched from the bed. Bam's hand pushed him back down, the touch concerned but firm. The splattered cum on his stomach smeared at the contact and Khun moaned weakly. He was spent, boneless and hypersensitive. When Bam's tongue slid free, however, Khun didn't understand why he still felt hot. Why did his body continue to pulse with need? He had barely breathed in the powder. Bam had been in it for longer. 

 

How was he able to hold back as much as he was?

 

Khun's eyes went huge as he watched Bam lick the fingers that had gone through his seed, and somehow those amber rings glowed even brighter, as if with new vigor.

 

Khun couldn't keep going. There was no way. 

 

Darkest hour

 

Khun swallowed hard as Rachel's words echoing in his mind. Bam was trembling himself now, as hard as he had been in the clearing. Each breath had a growl to it. Khun grit his teeth and tried to turn around. His plan was to go onto his stomach, present himself to tempt Bam to take him already . He realized something. The binding was gone. He was able to so what stopped him wasn't the water lock. 

 

It was Bam's clawed hands digging into his shoulders. 

 

Khun's tired mind took off again. 

 

Was he...doing something wrong? Was Bam...waiting for something specific? What did he need ? Besides the obvious? 

 

For all his frantic actions Bam was always captured by his eyes. So Khun decided even if he could push the beast off, if he needed to look at him then he would keep this position. "Take me, Bam." He tried again.

 

No reaction. It was like time had frozen save for Bam's labored breathing.

 

"My...pretty mate…" 

 

The words were spoken in such a sad way and so quietly Khun felt his heart might break. Tears pricked back at his eyes and while his legs were jello he planted his feet and lifted up, spreading his ass cheeks apart. "Your mate, yours," he cooed, rubbing himself against Bam's dick to entice, his own dick twitching with interest somehow. "You took such good care of me, Bam." A whine and those eerie eyes shut tight, hips finally moving. The mushroom head caught against his hole and Khun felt himself clench, but gods he could slip in so easily now. "You were so good. You can have me. I'm yours." A shift of his hips, tilting, and…

 

It was like an explosion through his system. All his nerves lit up at once as soon as the head entered him. If he wasn't fixated on watching his beast's reaction Khun's eyes would have also closed. Bam's roar as he moved his hands from Khun's shoulders to his hips mingled with his cry of shock, and he expected to have him slam into him. It would be quick. He was oversensitive but he could bite his tongue.

 

All Bam did was hold him there .

 

Khun felt a sob bubble in his throat at the sheer frustration . "BAM!" he wanted to hit him but he couldn't reach. Didn't have the strength anyway. "Why?! Please!" Why? Whywhywhy ? He squirmed and arched his body. Tried to slip him further inside. Nothing worked, not with this iron hold on him. All he ended up doing was making the punctures and scratches into gouges. 

 

To his slight horror and dismay, the limp cock on his abdomen started getting hard again the longer they stayed like this. Bam must have held him for two minutes and Khun was panting from delirium. Begging. Babbling. Please move. Take him. Bam had been doing so good why did he stop ? Pretty mate. Your mate. Move! Swearing. Need you. Want you. Please!

 

It wasn't until he was at full mast and feeling like Yihwa had set him aflame that Bam moved .

 

Khun was not ready

 

Every agonizingly slow inch by inch had Khun vibrating, choking on air and his spit. The slide was easy. There was no pain. Only a steak being driven into ice. Cracking. Spiderwebbing. Driving further in.

 

Bam was only halfway inside when Khun started thrashing .

 

Panic .

 

The ice was cracking. Little chips breaking from the weak spot and the steak had stopped but the ice was groaning under the pressure. 

 

Nails dug into flesh but the skin wasn't his and blood was on his tongue. 

 

No more pain on his hips but there were arms around his lithe frame. 

 

The steak drove deeper and there was ringing in his ears as something shattered .

 

Khun was wailing this time as a third orgasm ripped through him. Bam was fully seated, flushed against him hip to hip. The intensity stripped him raw and his cheeks felt hot with the fresh tears. Bam was shuddering in his grip and warmth filled Khun's body. Did Bam cum with him?

 

When had Khun's hands gone around his back? When did Bam move to hold him the same way? There was a bite on the ball of Bam's shoulder...his own? Claw marks were red, angry, and slightly bleeding on Bam's biceps and forearms. Was his back the same? 

 

Was it...over now?

 

Khun cried out softly and the noise fell into a whimper as Bam's hips started rolling. Right...Bam was in rut and the swell of his cock had barely gone down. The blue haired elf was limp in his hands and was admittedly relieved Bam seemed to be taking his own pleasure now. He was surprised there had been no move to Bond him yet. Did something stop Bam from doing it? Khun touched the mark's he didn't remember making, the gentle hand causing the other's breath to stutter. Was it because of this?

 

He felt so open and exposed. Vulnerable. Overwhelmed and emotional. Khun let himself rest on the bed and sprawled out, hands gripping the bedsheets above his head. Tear tracks stained his face and glittered on his lashes. When Bam pulled out Khun's mouth hung open a little further. As he pushed in Khun moaned unabashedly and without restraint, even tossed his head back a little. He felt like he was floating. Something was different and he didn't know what. All he knew was Bam felt amazing , sliding in and out of him like that. It was getting faster, all that restraint eroding away. Khun felt like he didn't mind, but for a different reason than before. 

 

Half-lidded eyes looked up at him, and all he saw was Bam, still in demon mode. No one else got to see this. This side of Bam was all his

 

Khun was startled by how heavily possessive that sounded. He didn't have time to think as the pace picked up. He was able to acknowledge the feeling but that was it. Bam's eyes had met his as he admired him and it was like a flip had been switched. Maybe now he let go he could come back from this state. Be Bam again. He didn't want to be bound while Bam wasn't able to talk to him about it. 

 

A hand found his cock and Khun was flabbergasted he had a slight chub after all the abuse. He cried out and squirmed, "No! Bam it's too much! Please don't!" It fell on deaf ears. Bam was working him up again and he was powerless. It should be impossible. Not this close together. His body should be screaming and in pain from it, but it was the opposite. He was craving it. Yearning for more. 

 

What was wrong with him? It wasn't the powder anymore. It couldn't be. Khun was unable to figure it out though. Not when he felt like his brain was being scrambled and forcibly shut off. All he could do was gasp in air and take it, take what Bam had to give. To endure the rough pounding and how the other's shaft filled him to the brim. Khun could feel every bit of him, hyperaware. 

 

His eyes roamed Bam's toned, muscular torso again when the hand touching him let go. He took his thigh for a moment in order to gain leverage and got faster. Khun's own torso was covered with his seed, the morning light making it shine. He could feel some of it drying but his skin was also slicked with sweat. Any other time he would be disgusted, feel gross and want to shower. Right now, all he could see was how some of it was in Bam from when he came between them. His dick, previously limp but now hard and bouncing with the movement of Bam's thrusts, throbbed weakly and Khun could feel it. The way his abdomen clenched and when he scrunched his eyes shut, teeth gritted and back bowing, Bam seemed to sense what was going on. Instead of simply speed, the thrusts faulted and got harder, punching the air from Khun's lungs and- 

 

He felt the teeth on his neck and his hands flew to Bam's head. Wrenching him away, he was desperate as he crashed their lips together. Bam had growled, not liking that he had stopped, but as soon as their lips met he pressed the length of their bodies together. The little friction was enough for the eruption for him, and his clenching ass sent Bam over the edge, too.

 

Shuddering hard with only enough strength to hold him in place, Khun pried open his beast's mouth and a pleased hum vibrated his throat as the other followed the action easily. With his demon side in control there was no finesse, but that was fine. Khun didn't mind doing all the work, tilting his head and flicking out his tongue. There was no need for shyness here. No room for it. Bam's tongue touched his and they swirled together, rubbing and...oh, yeah, Bam's tongue was definitely long. At least he didn't fuck his mouth with it, not yet. They took the moment to explore, Khun's tracing over teeth sharp as razor blades and massaging the gums. Bam, ever the fast learner, did the same for him. It was delightful. Heady. Something that calmed the turmoil of the situation and made Khun shake for another reason. 

 

He loved Bam .

 

Even here, filled with two orgasms from his demon, covered in cum and his cock seeming to follow Bam's example and staying half-hard. Even with amber and black staring back at blue and white. He loved him. Loved him so much his chest ached with it. He loved the demon above him just as much as the angel with the sunshine smile. Because they were two halves of the same whole. 

 

Bam .

 

Elves had fangs and they were sometimes compared to cats. Though their teeth were not as sharp or as long as other species. His certainly weren't as long as Wangnan's. The bite on Bam's shoulder was a vicious looking one, though mostly healed already. Khun didn't want that. 

 

"Please, Bam. Please figure it out." He sent a rush of cool winter air into Bam's open mouth, tensing and shivering when Bam's hard-on jumped and seemed to get harder. Bam even moaned and that went right to his own crotch. Focus . "Share your magic with me," he whispered on his lips. Bam didn't seem to be cognizant about his words most of the time, but he prayed he understood this.

 

A surge of warmth that tingled his tongue and tasted like roasted marshmallows, sweet with a hint of charcoal, filled his mouth. It startled him how this nephalem's magic with that description fit Bam so well . He would have laughed about it, but he spun the magic around and mixed it with his own in order for his system to accept it easier. Then he closed his eyes and focused on a spell, turning his teeth long and sharp with sparkles of icy blue and ember orange. It wouldn’t be permanent, but it would last for a while.

 

When he flopped on his back again, no strength left to hold himself up, Bam started to move again. It was slow, almost sensual. Tender. The look his beast was giving him, eyes smoldering and filled with something he couldn't name, made Khun whimper softly. It felt like he was being seen . Stared right through to his very core. If it was anyone else he would feel uncomfortable, he would hate it and throw up all his guards and walls. He was tense but he was too tired to fight, and didn’t have the will to. Not against Bam. 

 

Bam shifted them, and what had once been static dancing across his nerves lit up . It made him cry out with the electric shock of it and his hands flew from their limp position on the bed to bite and grasp onto Bam’s arms. Khun’s eyes were wide and wild, gasping and trembling. 

 

His beast made his stomach roll, terrified and intrigued again, as a slow dare he say devilish smile pulled at his lips and he even saw how the corner of his eyes crinkled with mischief. Oh...oh no. He had found that spot again from before and Khun felt him slide out a little further, then slammed back in. Not changing the position he had.

 

White flashed behind Khun’s eyes and he shrieked , arching hard.

 

Situating his leg around his hip, Bam drove forward. Again and again. Khun couldn’t breathe. All he could do was hold on and suck in air when his lungs burned. Pleasure, white hot and unforgiving. Four. He’d come four times and yet his body was cruising for another. Sure, he was an elf and his endurance was much higher than any human’s, but he should have passed out by now. 

 

Fuck, Bam felt so good inside him.

 

He had been so lost in his head he wasn't properly focused on Bam. There was something different about this time. It wasn't primal need or wondering what he'd been doing wrong. He felt so full. Stretched pleasantly wide and his demon hit so deep . The pleasure searing his mind from that place inside him had him feeling like he was hanging onto a live wire. Was his cock hard again? Somehow? His abdomen felt so sore from clenching and releasing so many times. His balls were empty, he had nothing left to give. Yet whatever tied him to Bam kept him conscious. Kept him at the edge of not being able to take this kind of abuse and just barely being able to keep up. He wished he hadn't cum from the blowjob. He'd been so pathetic to not hold out. Maybe he'd have more strength to even move his hips, to make this better for Bam.

 

It took him much longer to feel his coil burn this time. For the fifth time. His demon didn't seem to mind, spurred on by Khun's noises. The broken moaning, the keening whimpers. Khun found himself hoping Bam liked the sight of him, too. How his hair was sprawled around, no doubt matted in places. The way he arched so pretty for him when he struck the spot so good. Sunlight streaming in on them and shining in his sapphire eyes. It made his demon look so beautiful, too. It took Khun's breath away and he already was dizzy from lack of oxygen. 

 

He wanted to tell Bam how good he felt. How he made him feel amazing with his cock. Yet his voice was wrecked and he couldn't form the words if he tried. As the pulsing in his abdomen got worse, it was all he could do to reach his shaking arms up. Beckoning his demon with tired eyes that also loved him. Bam came willingly. Because of course he did. The position changed but Khun forced strength into his legs to wrap both around Bam's hips, driving his heels into the other's ass to guide him and Khun threw his head back when the white hot pleasure returned. Like this. Just like this. He told him without words by moaning obscenely in his ear. 

 

Bam gave him an uneven sharp thrust and Khun keened, arms going around his neck and nudging him closer to his shoulder. His lips brushed against the junction between Bam's, and Khun's heart stuttered thinking this was the first real chance he had to taste and lick and suck. He had only wrung out an orgasm via a blowjob and that was it. Bam was salty from sweat, too, and his skin was smooth under his tongue. Later, he promised himself. Later he would take the time to ravish this man like he was starving and Bam was his salvation. Ironic, those thoughts, but it was true.

 

He didn't need or want anyone but Bam.

 

"Coming…" he whispered, knowing Bam could hear him. He scraped the teeth he'd lengthened on that delicious tendon and smirked at the strangled sound from his demon. Then he felt the prick, a warning as Bam sped up, the other’s breathing labored. "I want you. I want your bond." 

 

A short cry, but not from him this time. 

 

A deep-seated groan reached Khun's pointed ears and with a couple more pumps of Bam's hips, a couple more hits on that spot, and they were both flying high. Sinking his fangs into his demon's shoulder, he felt the sweet slide of Bam's. There was a flare of energy and magic around them and it would have blinded Khun if his eyes weren't screwed shut as Bam's blood rushed over his taste buds. Warm and sweet like honeyed milk. Blood and chocolate. He suddenly couldn’t get enough of it, gulping it down and let it coat his throat, a vampire’s hunger filling him.

 

They were suspended like that for a good moment, and then it was just as Wangnan had said.

 

Everything came rushing down into them and snapped into place.

 

Khun made a muffled sound around Bam’s shoulder and felt fingers winding into his hair. He whined as he was pried from his sweet blood and was heaving , his eyes staring unseeing. There was brown. A wicked fire. Sunlight. 

 

Wanted .

 

A pulse through his body. Twin gasps. 

 

Lips stained red. The slick slide of it over his skin as it went to pool on the bedsheets. 

 

Needed .

 

Ice and snow thawing under the beating of the sun and spring’s rays. Melting, melting, faster and faster and warmer and hotter. Summer. Summer was above him and around him and in him

 

There was a rain shower while the sky was so bright and cloudless. He felt it on his skin, sinking into his hair.

 

Desperate for you. Needing you. Craving you. Dependant on you. Wanting you. 

 

Loving you.

 

A bubble of a sob got his attention and brought him back to the present. Bam was moving. How long had he been moving? It was as sweet and tender again, but it didn’t change. There was no ringing in his ears from the pleasure spot, and he realized he was completely limp, legs loose and Bam no longer hitting the spot because he didn’t have the presence of mind to keep at it. Five . Five orgasms and he was drifting. Another splash on his skin, a sting that made him hiss and flinch. Salt in a wound was unpleasant but the pain helped him clear his vision. Just a bit. Enough to look and see while the white of his eyes hadn’t returned, his demon looked as emotional as Bam could get when he was his usual self. Face scrunched and tears falling fast and free. 

 

Khun moved his head up and was barely able to kiss the underside of Bam’s jaw before falling back down. He couldn’t. Couldn’t move. Everything was too sore...but Bam was moving him. Bam’s hands took both of Khun’s and water-locked them together, then slipped them over his head. Arms wrapped under his back and lifted him. Pained whimpers from being in one position and moving at all fell from him but soon Bam was sitting on his haunches, moving Khun for him, using him. Yet even as he did his touches were kind. Soothing. Petting and stroking his hair, his back. Cooing little noises were coming from Bam and Khun let it happen. It was like he knew where he hurt and was doing his best to massage him. To care for him even as he continued to take what he needed. 

 

All Khun could do was keep bleary eyes on Bam’s. His hair bounced with the movement, his mouth was hanging open, blood drying on his lips and chin.

 

Mine .

 

It startled him and he blinked at Bam slowly. Bam was getting a little more rough, but in spite of it all it felt good . His demon still felt so good.

 

His . His demon.

 

Mine

 

There was an echo on the ‘mine’ this time. His and Bam’s dual-toned. He heard it in his mind and felt it...felt it in his soul .

 

The realization hit him and made his eyes widen a little bit, gasping. Bam’s grip on his hips tightened and he was moved a little faster. It was shallow, bouncing him and grinding into him, but it was growing more desperate. Khun didn’t have anything but a simmer. It wasn’t enough and that was fine. This was more than perfect. Bam was perfect . “Yours.” He whispered and shivered and tensed when he was pushed back down, as far as his demon could reach and there was a flicker of the hot pleasure, but then he was being filled with heat. Khun didn’t know how Bam was able to keep filling him, but they were even now, five for five and they were falling. Khun braced for impact.

 

Bam was able to twist their bodies, finally looking exhausted himself. Head pillowed on Bam’s arm, he felt him slide out and the gush that followed…

 

He was unconscious in three seconds flat.

Chapter Text

When Khun woke up, everything ached .

 

Surprised? No. But also...yes? He expected a lot more pain than this. Instead he felt like he did after a hard day of training; aching all over and his muscles throbbing in protest at every movement.

 

Still...as he blinked bleary eyes open and registered the steady rise and fall of a chest underneath him, what scattered memories he had of earlier came rushing back. Sitting up sharply, he winced heavily and stared down at the man he had been literally pining over just yesterday. Now here they were.

 

Bonded .

 

Khun had seen him through his darkest hour and survived. They'd made it out the other side and he could feel the quiet buzz of his sleeping nephalem. It was everything he had ever wanted…

 

Yet as he looked down at his body all he felt was terror .

 

Moving carefully but already knowing Bam was a heavy sleeper, Khun pushed through his pain and throbbing to settle himself over the other's torso. Reaching out a trembling hand he summoned the oil to him, also noticing the bowls of stew wrapped and preserved as well as their canteens. His nose wasn't as good as Bam's or Wangnan's but he sniffed the air regardless since he did have good senses. 

 

He smelled summer spices and warmth different from Bam’s. Wangnan. Of all people...it made his face scrunch but as he looked back at his sorry state he noticed he was at least...cleaned. No crusty bits from blood or cum, which would have most definitely caused infections. He supposed...he had to thank him, on some level. Even if it was going to be hard to look the werebull in the eye later.

 

Khun slicked his hole up, teeth sinking into his bottom lip at the tenderness, biting back whimpers as he stretched himself. He could feel the evidence of Bam still. It got his limp cock twitching and he slathered Bam's morning wood before sending the oil back where it came from. Slowly, shaking from the effort, he sank down on the hard, throbbing shaft. 

 

Bam looked a vision of perfection, the only mark on him the clear spot of Khun's Bond bite. 

 

Khun, on the other hand? It was why he was so scared. He looked like he had been used as a chew toy. Chewed on and spat back out. Complete with clawed hips, thighs, and even thin scratches on his calves and shins from Bam readjusting his position and hold. He felt the pull of the gouges on his back. 

 

A fat teardrop landed on the hand holding himself above Bam and he brought the other up to cover his mouth.

 

"What if he rejects your Bond?" Rachel's voice slithered into his brain.

 

Yet had she failed to even consider Bam might be the one to reject him ?

 

People could survive a Bond breaking, yet they would forever be scarred by it. Would never be the same. 

 

Khun leaned himself back instead of forward, to try and keep his tears from waking the man up. Now that he was adjusted, he started lifting up and slowly going back down. Throat parched he summoned the canteen and hoped it would be a good distraction. It was cooling and refreshing, making him sigh into the first couple gulps.

 

He was good at hiding his feelings. He could learn how the Bond worked in a day or two and figure out how to block the in and out transfer. If Bam woke up and didn't want him because of how awful he looked after a night with his demon, then Khun could offer that as a solution rather than a full break and rejection. All he had to do was keep him in a position where he was forced to listen instead of running away as soon as he looked at him.

 

Capping and tossing the item on the bed he started moving a little more deliberately. He'd seen Bam shifting, and knew that the truth of the matter was going to come to light very soon.

 

Then he changed his angle slightly and let out a noise by accident as he rammed into his own prostate. Bam's eyes fluttered open and ' gods he's so beautiful …' danced across his mind.

 

He felt steadying hands on his waist, but he wasn't expecting the other man to start moving him . "B-Bam…?" He gasped louder and keened in his throat as the spot was hit again, "W-what…?"

 

"Ah...Khun...Khun that feels so good…" 

 

Bam's voice was back to normal. Gold still burned a little bit, but there was no more black save for his blown pupils. He was back

 

The movement stopped and the haze cleared a little.

 

Concern flooded Khun's mind. From the Bond. It was disorienting and he swayed. That only got more concern. "Bam, I'm…I'm alright…" he tried in his usual reassuring tone.

 

"You're not!"

 

Fear, from himself, hit the link before Khun could stop it. 'No, no dont stop, don't leave' -he squeezed his body around the cock inside him and started moving again through the screaming of his muscles. 

 

The nephalem hissed. He saw Bam's face scrunch in confusion, his hands flexing to force him to stop . "You're so afraid...why are you afraid of me leaving?" Oh Gods, he understood him? Did they get telepathy? 

 

Yet Bam didn't respond to the question about telepathy and was rubbing soothing circles into Khun's hips, around the deep puncture and gouged indents. Khun could also feel where he was bruised, had seen a few that were angry red and yellow, some with a bit of green. Khun unstuck his throat. "I look horrible, Bam…"

 

Bam traced his fingers over the scabbed scratches on Khun's thigh, his nails no longer long and deadly sharp. "You...you do…" he agreed with a hard wince. He rolled his hips and shuddered, suddenly going as still as he could, "Fuck, sorry, you're...all around me and…" his eyes didn't change in color but Khun could tell they were glazing over, Bam's body trembling from the effort of being still. "Khun...Khun you should get off of me-"

 

"Why?" Khun felt the prickle at his eyes and threw his head back to expose his neck while simultaneously keeping his tears from view. He deliberately rocked down , driving Bam deeper and he felt the pressure on his prostate. Part of him was embarrassed he had been so out of it before hadn't been able to remember anatomy. It didn't matter. Bam was flexing his hands, and with him distracted Khun was able to lift up and back down, pulling a keen out of his Bondmate that had Khun's dick jumping and his nerves lighting up. "Ah! Shit, why do I keep feeling this burn?" 

 

He had muttered it to himself under his breath but it made a curious sound come from the other man, followed by "Because you're...compatible w-with m-e…" he squirmed under Khun's hand holding himself up still. "Khun get off !"

 

"If you want me off of you you're more than capable of moving me. You're also holding me down."

 

A whimper, "If I'd let you go you would move again."

 

"Then move me off if you don't want me." 

 

Khun had used the tone that masked his emotions the best. A dead one. His entire speech had been matter-of-fact and even a little cold. Yet he still wasn't looking down at him. 

 

"Wh-what?" It was choked, shock in Bam's voice and something else. Even the Bond felt like he was all sorts of confused.

 

Khun hated that confusion, but he forged on. Doing what he'd jumped on Bam's cock for to begin with. "If you don't want me, then I can figure out how the Bond works and block everything out. You won't feel anything from me. Seeing that you hurt me is too much for you, isn't it? You don't want to look at me or touch me because you'll hurt me more, right?" He squeezed his eyes shut so he wasn't looking at an already blurred ceiling. "Just don't break it." He could live on with the pain of a broken Bond, but Bam? It would ruin him. Bam hadn't asked for it. Had been in an incoherent state. Khun hated himself for cracking in a moment of weakness and vulnerability to forge it with his demon. For not holding out until he was aware of his mind and what he wanted. Bam wouldn't be the same at all if the Bond was cut, and he knew it.

 

Khun didn't know what he was feeling from the Bond right now, but it was for the best since all he had was his own turmoil. "If you have the balls to say I can't look at you then why aren't you looking at me ?" Oh... fuck that was Bam's angry tone. No wonder he felt nothing. Bam always kept his anger hidden as well as Khun kept his feelings locked up. Rapidly beating his lashes to clear his eyes, he tried to clear the traces of his tears before he faced him, but he was suddenly grabbed by the shoulder and flipped onto his back. Bam's face was stone only for a flash of a moment before golden eyes went huge . "K-Khun?! Why are you-" 

 

All of a sudden it was a whirlwind that flooded Khun's mind and heart through Bam's side. Where there had been silence there was now a whisper of No, no, no, my pretty, don't cry . All the while Khun felt large warm hands cupping his face and a broad forehead against his own. With his eyes closing again he felt more hot wetness leaking into his hair on his temples. Khun understood it now. They only heard thoughts when accompanied by the intensity of emotion that spawned them. Perhaps with cultivation it could bloom into telepathy…

 

Ah, but who was he kidding?

 

"I was selfish with it, Bam." He told him, voice strained and raw. The other had slipped out during the sudden movement, but Khun brought his own hands up to lightly wrap his fingers at Bam's wrists, "I made the Bond when you were in that state and couldn't even talk to me. When you barely even understood me." He cracked his eyes back open and let out a shuddering breath as he felt the gush from what he held back behind his eyelids. He gave Bam a smile, but it was broken, "I took something from you when I swore I only wanted you to be free to choose. I promised to follow you as far as I could. That doesn't mean forever. I-" 

 

"What if I want it to be?" Bam interrupted and watched Khun blink at him slowly. "Didn't you realize that the demon is me, too? Didn't you make the Bond with me while I was like that to show me you accepted me no matter what?" He stroked calloused thumbs across Khun's cheeks and started to try and dry the salty water. "You're not just my 'pretty mate'." He started to kiss along his face, lingering and memorable. "I want you." Each word at his forehead and temples. "I need you." Each cheek just under his eyes and then by his jaw, which startled Khun. "I love you..." the other side of his jaw, then each corner of his mouth. Khun had stopped breathing. "... Aguero ." it was whispered over his lips and there was a broken sob that bubbled out between them. Bam was there to hold him, to catch him, and they crashed their lips together.

 

A pulse in Aguero's bloodstream had him gasping and Bam dove into him. It seemed he really had been coherent to some extent as Aguero's lesson on how to kiss came back. No clacking of teeth or awkward angles. Swirling and rubbing, tracing his teeth. All of it made his mind swim. He moved the hands holding Bam's wrists to grip and hold onto Bam's back and shoulders, scrambling, not really sure where he wanted them. All he wanted was Bam closer

 

"I got you, Aguero," Bam cooed, rolling his body up and Aguero tensed only for a second as he felt the tip of Bam's shaft at his entrance. As soon as he relaxed, going completely complacent, there was no resistance. Sliding all the way in in a single smooth motion, his hips settled against his ass when he was fully seated. Aguero and Bam moaned in unison and Aguero squirmed, taking notice that he was hard already. Were they...going to have that many orgasms again? Could he handle it? 

 

"Shhh," a gentle hand pet his hair, and he was being kissed all over his face again this time it was a flutter of butterfly wings, "You can handle anything, Aguero. Did you hear me? We're compatible. You can't give me pups, but you're my omega. You feel so hot because you're in heat to my rut. It was triggered somehow because of the powder. I don't know, but I don't think it matters." Aguero's hands were being grabbed and pressed into the pillows, but no water lock spell. Only Bam's firm presence kept him there. It made Aguero's heart clench feeling their fingers intertwine and how Bam's cock throbbed inside him. "You're mine and that's what I care about."

 

Mine .

 

It reverberated through the Bond and Aguero arched into Bam, chests colliding and sliding at the contact. He groaned deep and squeezed his fingers with Bam's. He was caught in a golden sun and this time it was a slow burn. A rocking of the others hips forward and his own canting down to meet him, his legs hooked on thick thighs. Their breaths mingled and words stopped. Whatever they were doing felt amazing; the slick slide and the friction and how big Bam was, filling what felt like every inch. “Ba-am…” 

 

No frantic pounding. All it was, was the shallow but deep grind and with one easy shift of Bam's hips Aguero's voice went up in pitch, "There!" Taking the hint, while the grinding continued it hit him just right and he gripped at the hands holding him in place. His eyes were shining with the tears from earlier and the wetness glinted off his lashes, dew on spiderweb strings. 

 

"You're mine, Aguero. You're doing so well for me. All for me." Bam's eyes went half-lidded and he purred, "You squeezed around me, love-ah, you like it when I praise you? When I call you my love? You're my dal , my moon. I love you so much. So good. You feel good around me, all around me it makes my head all hazy…" he panted, pulling his hands so he put his arms around his neck, one hand slipping around to grab his ass, squeeze and put him even more flush against him, "Want you...so badly. Need you. Ah, fuck, Aguero…"

 

Of all the things, Aguero did not expect a rambling Bam who whispered such dirty sweet nothings. Didn't expect how handsy and needy he was. It set off so many good things in his brain, and through the pain he tightened his legs over thick thunder thighs and tried to meet Bam's pace. Because he wanted it. Needed it. It drove him insane to be needed and wanted as desperately as Bam seemed to crave him. "Yes...yes, Bam. I feel...feel you...fuck, I...ah, ah...I can't, I'm so hot, I can't stop-" 

 

"No," it was low, deep, and Aguero felt everything stop . "I want to. Together."

 

Aguero whimpered and all he could do was cling to him, nodding into his shoulder, "A-Alright Bam…" 

 

It was harder than it seemed.

 

Before long, his mind was getting hazy as all he could feel was the Bond, how it flowed with Bam's love and admiration -it was getting easier to discern who was who- and even the deep lust still in his veins. This rut was a powerful thing and neither of them were really prepared. It was like a drug, and rational thought was nigh impossible. Coupled with the throbbing of Bam's cock buried to the hilt? Aguero couldn't help it as he started rocking, panting, trying to relieve the pressure in his groin.

 

"I was a virgin before you." Bam continued to move after what felt like ages, rocking into him with renewed vigor, spurred on by how he was breaking down, "Gods, you're so needy for me you can't wait, can you?"

 

"No…" was the moaned answer by sheer reflex, but then the word 'virgin' clicked in his brain. He was reminded of what Wangnan said, too. "W-Wait! Back up, you were-ah!" It was hard to think as he never slowed and continued his assault on his sensitive spot. Aguero thumped an irritated fist on his back only to groan and roll his eyes back, "Fuck! Bam, I-"

 

"I wanted it with you. All of this." He let go of his ass and wrapped his arms around Aguero's back, "Don't. Don't be sorry about anything. Let me fill you up, pretty, again and again. I want to see you come apart. It's only midday. Gods, I need you so bad…" Bam whimpered and Aguero started feeling peppered kisses and the nipping of teeth on his neck. 

 

“Faster...Bam, please ...I’m going insane,” Aguero groaned helplessly. He’d been on his back most of the time before and everything was so sore. The grinding was driving him absolutely mad and he felt like he could hardly keep up the way he wanted to, “More…”

 

In a dizzying roll, Aguero found himself sprawled over Bam’s body instead of under it. Blinking slowly, he only made a soft noise in his throat as he felt both hands on his waist, guiding him to bounce back and his thighs burned as he moved with the nephalem, “Oh fuck, Bam...ah...shit, that’s…” it was babbled nonsense and he gripped Bam’s shoulder and arm, his cock still trapped between their bodies but it was his own weight instead of Bam’s, and he whined at the friction while he was being slammed back onto his thick shaft.

 

“You want more, pretty,” Bam cooed in his ear, and at the feeling of a scorching tongue over the shell Aguero felt his eyes rolling as he shuddered. “Take what you want from me.”

 

On shaky arms, Aguero pushed himself up until he was in the same position he found him in. Yet this time his head was thrown back for a different reason. Desperate gasps filled the air and he didn't even care about the ache in his legs until they gave out, inconveniencing him just when he found the perfect angle.


Bam seemed entertained by his irritation and the growl of frustration, chuckling before Aguero felt his whole body being lifted up and the dropped right back down. The elf keened, shouting and that made Bam go faster and oh gods why was it such a fucking turn on to be used like this? Swinging his head forward again he watched Bam watching him, completely enthralled with each other.

 

It was empowering in a way being looked at by others wasn't. 

 

This powerful demon/angel hybrid was looking at him like that. He was Bonded to this magnificent, beautifully sweet kindhearted man who could decimate entire battlefields and still reach his hand out to people in need of his help. 

 

That same creature was lifting him as if he weighed nothing at all while his gaze, full of desire, still had so much love to give. Bam was a living breathing contradiction. Aguero had felt it before, too. How tenderly his demon caressed him while wringing him dry. Bam was right. Of course he was. This pulsing Bond swirling with a mix of their emotions was made because he accepted everything Bam was.

 

"Fill me up, Bam…" Aguero panted, breath puffing out of him with each thrust, "C'mon, baby, you can do it." A groan from beneath him tightened the coil in his abdomen but they couldn't look away, eyes half-lidded and mouths hanging open. 

 

"Together…" Bam's rambling had stopped but it didn't matter with all of the "ah, fuck, ah, yes, oh,"s that escaped them both. 

 

"I'm…right there, Bam…" Aguero promised, "Trying...hold back…'cause you said...ah... no ."

 

"Oh, fuck...fuck, yeah, I did...Gods, Aguero , you're so fucking amazing...pretty, my pretty, I'm gunna…" the thrusts got more erratic and only a couple hit his prostate but it didn't matter as watching Bam squirm and come apart drove him wild .

 

"Cum...Bam, Bam please , please, let me…together! Like you want! Please !" 

 

"Let go, oh Gods, let-" 

 

More loud shouting and Aguero felt himself bursting , light spots dancing in his vision as his nails scratched hard across Bam's chest as his hands tensed. His body jerked forward, ropes of cum spilling over the other man's chest as he felt his quivering insides get coated thoroughly with his mate's . Arms gave out and Aguero fell into a heap on top of him, breathing heavy. A deep groan of exhaustion this time left them both and they were boneless puddles.

 

Rumble .

 

Aguero blinked slowly and looked up at Bam who was also startled. "Was that-" they stopped, realizing it didn't matter because they were both starving . Aguero had slugged water earlier, but fuck was he parched now. "Food." He told Bam sternly, but paused and a smile spread across his face even as he blushed, "Take care of your pretty mate , Bam." Food, water, bathroom business. "Then you can have me again, until your rut is over. I promise."

 

Ah, there was his sunshine smile. "Right!" 

 

After all, Khun Aguero Agnis did not make promises lightly.