Chapter Text
Tax Fraud Squad
4;online Dec 9, 8:30 am
bruh: guys help
bruh: i got my finger stuck in a pencil sharpener
bruh: it kinda hurts
angel: how did you manage to do that
bruh: i got paired up with this guy for a project and were supposed to be brainstorming
bruh: but he's talking with someone else so i got bored
bruh: so i stuck my finger in a pencil sharpener
angel: ...look i know youre socially awkward but you have to try
bruh: im not socially awkward :/
bruh: he just saw me with my finger in a pencil sharpener so i winked ar him
bruh: whos awkward now? 😎😎
shit eater is online
shit eater: HAS ANYONE SEEN HAO
bruh: no
angel: ^
edgelord: why are you looking for him?
shit eater: I NEED HIM
shit eater: he has to hakuna my tatas ;)
edgelord removed shit eater from the chat
edgelord: im sorry i just cant handle that this early
edgelord: actually
edgelord: i can never handle it
angel: i really dont understand yalls friendship
edgelord: its mostly based on the fact that i couldn't make any friends when i was like 6
child: thats pu$$y man
edgelord: wtf
child: sorry that went to the wrong chat
angel: no chan tell us
angel: what is pu$$y
child: you dont know what a pu$$y is?
edgelord: we do know what it is
edgelord: but why are you using it as an adjective
edgelord: thats weird
child: CAUSE I JUST WANTED TO BE COOL FOR ONCE OK???
child: I WANTED TO BE LIKE THE COOL KIDZ WHO USE WEIRD WORDS
child: I WANTED TO BE A TRENDSETTER
edgelord: adding dollar signs doesn't make it cooler
child: GO AWAY
angel: actually it kinda has a ring too it honestly
child: see?
bruh: i got my finger unstuck :)
angel: thats pu$$y bro
bruh: huh
edgelord: dont even question it
edgelord: its not worth the time
bruh: ok...
angel: only the cool kids have pu$$y
child: mhm
bruh: dang where can i get one
child: PFF
angel: the pu$$y store
bruh: wheres that
angel: where ever you want it to be
child: thats the pu$$y guarantee
bruh: now im more confused
edgelord: ITS TO EARLY FOR THIS
single added shit eater to the chat
single: im sorry i had to
single: he kept singing hakuna ma tata
single: and awkwardly throwing it back to the point where it pained me
single: for the sake of my sanity i added him back
single is offline
shit eater: hey sexies ;)
edgelord: usually when i take out the trash it doesn't come back :/
shit eater: :"(
bruh: guys my partner asked my name do i tell him?
angel: yes!
bruh: but you always say Stranger Danger
angel: he wants to be your friend! (maybe)
bruh: hmmm
angel: just tell him your name
bruh: okay :)
edgelord: jun wanna play minecraft??? :)
shit eater: YES LETS GO TO MY FAV WORLD
edgelord: not the one with the 3D dick right?
shit eater: no the one with the strip club
edgelord: ok :))))
shit eater: im so excited to show you
shit eater: i added a new section and new strippers
shit eater: wait a minute
shit eater: WONWOO YOU FUCKER
edgelord: thats revenge for blowing up my minecraft cat cafe >:(
shit eater: I SPENT THREE MONTHS ON THAT
edgelord: I SPENT FOUR MONTHS ON MY CAT CAFE
angel: what happened
shit eater: HE BLEW UP MY MINECRAFT STRIP CLUB
shit eater: I BUILT THE ENTIRE THING OUT OF DIAMOND AND IN SURVIVAL MODE
shit eater: YOU FUCKER THAT TOOK SO LONG
edgelord: I HAD TO GO OUT AND FIND FUCKING CATS
edgelord: AND GET SO MUCH FISH
edgelord: I ALMOST DIED LIKE 10000000 TIMES
shit eater: D I A M O N D
shit eater: THE ENTIRE THING
shit eater: YOUR CAT HUNTING COULD NOT MATCH UP TO THE HOURS I WAS IN THE MINE
shit eater: THE NUMBER OF PICKAXES I FUCKING DESTROYED
edgelord: YK WHAT
edgelord: YOU KIDNAPPED A BUNCH OF VILLAGERS FOR THAT STRIP CLUB
edgelord: THATS ILLEGAL YOU SICK FUCK
shit eater: ITS MINECRAFT??????*&*&)(
shit eater: ALSO I WAS PAYING THEM?????
shit eater: YOU KNOW ITS ALWAYS BEEN MY DREAM TO BE A MINECRAFT PIMP AND OWN A STRIP CLUB
edgelord: WELL I GUESS YOURE GONNA HAVE TO DO WITHOUT THAT STRIP CLUB
single is online
single: wonwoo why is jun crying >:(
edgelord: i blew up his strip club
single: YOU FUCKING DIDNT
edgelord: i did
single: YOU BITCH
single: YOU KNOW MY FAV VILLAGER FREDRICKSON WORKED THERE
single: YOU KNOW HE HAD TO RAISE HIS LITTLE SISTER ALL BY HIMSELF
edgelord: HE HAS TO RAISE HER ALONE CAUSE YOU KILLED HIS MOM
single: IN MY DEFENSE THE BOOK SHE WAS SELLING WAS OVERPRICED
edgelord: ITS STILL MURDER????
bruh: seungkwan says yall are weird
single: who?
bruh: my partner
bruh: he's been reading over my shoulder for the past 7 mins
bruh: he also askes why jun didn't make a copy of his world
shit eater: i did ;-;
shit eater: but a creeper blew it up
shit eater: i heard creeper stripers were very popular
shit eater: but they didn't like me
bruh: seungkwan says that creeper stripers are overrated and you should have done zombie stripers
shit eater: i know that now :/
shit eater: also
shit eater: since when do you have the social skills to make friends
bruh: well after i told him my name we actually started to do work (but we mostly ended up chatting about random things)
bruh: but then you blew up the chat
bruh: and he read over my shoulder
shit eater: im so proud of you <3
bruh: thanks :/
bruh: means a lot coming from someone who wanted to eat dog shit
shit eater: EVERYTIME I TRY TO BE NICE YALL ARE MEAN >:(
single: HOLY FUCK YOU REALLY DID BLOW IT UP
edgelord: HE LITERALLY KILLED ALL MY CATS
edgelord: EVEN SPARKY >>:((
edgelord: OF COURSE IM GONNA BLOW UP HIS SHITHOLE OF A CLUB
shit eater: THE SERVICE THERE WAS GREAT WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
edgelord: YOU THREW ME INTO LAVA????
shit eater: HAVENT YOU HEARD OF LAVA PLAY???
shit eater: PLUS YOU WERE THE ONE WHO ASKED FOR PREMIUM SERVICE
edgelord: LAVA PLAY IS NOT A THING
edgelord: UNLESS YOU ARE TRYING TO BECOME A PIECE OF ROASTED CHICKEN
shit eater: DONT YOU KNOW THATS WHATS HOT THESE DAYS
edgelord: CHICKEN PEOPLE????
shit eater: ugh so hot 🥵🥵🥵
single: purchasing a chicken suit rn
single: its kinda hot ngl
single: chicken suit gon make me act up
edgelord: oh my fucking god
edgelord: furries
shit eater: SAYS THE MAN MEOWED AT ME
single: uwu wonwoo cat boy? owo
edgelord: die minghao
single: rawr x3 *nuzzles* uwu how are you? *pounces on you* you're so warm o3o
edgelord: im going to cry please stop
shit eater: WONWOO WHY DID YOU CHANGE UR USERNAME ON TWITTER TO MAN TITTIE THINKER
edgelord: THAT WAS MINGHAO I SWEAR
single: but you haven't changed it back 🤔🤔🤔
edgelord: CAUSE YOU CHANGED MY PASSWORD YOU ASSHAT
edgelord: I TRIED TO CHANGE IT
single: :p oh well
edgelord: WHAT DO YOU MEAN OH WELL
edgelord: ALL MY MOOTS THINK IM CRAZY
shit eater: deserved
edgelord: jun shut up you have gotten suspended too many time for talking about sexting with minghao
shit eater: ig im too nsfw for that app :/
edgelord: ur too nsfw for this chat loser :///
shit eater: r00d >:(
single: mister fuzzy balls uwu
edgelord: minghao im going to throat punch you so hard
single: punish me daddy owo *nuzzles your necky wecky* ~murr~ hehe ;)
shit eater: >:0
edgelord: im going to commit not alive rn
pervert is online
pervert: heya pals!!!!!!!
pervert: isnt it such a wonderful day!!!!!!!!!!!!!
angel: you've seen a cute boy
pervert: ...how did you know?
angel: who the fuck says pals and uses like 15 exclamation points when their not in the middle of a "I've Seen a Cute Boy¨ crisis
angel: honestly thats the most basic gay crisis :/
shit eater: i say pals :(
angel: you dont count
angel: you use the word "bussy" as part of your everyday vocabulary
shit eater: I SAID BUSSY ONE TIME
shit eater: ONE TIME
angel: ;)
angel: anyway
angel: what do you need josh
pervert: how do you not act stupid in front of someone
bruh: idk think about them in their underwear?
pervert: SHEJRHEHRKKSEJUEEEEEEEEEEEE
shit eater: OooOOOOOooooo he horny horny ;)
pervert: 01101110 01101111 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01100111 01101000 01110100 01110011 00100000 01101000 01100101 01100001 01100100 00100000 01100101 01101101 01110000 01110100 01111001 00100000 01101111 01101110 01101100 01111001 00100000 01100011 01110101 01110100 01100101 00100000 01100010 01101111 01111001
angel: you fuckin broke him
shit eater: OOOOOoooooOO you wanna hakuna his tata
pervert: die
bruh: seungkwan says to imagine them as a dog
pervert: whos seungkwan
bruh: my work partner
bruh: *my friend
bruh: hes my friend now?
pervert: good for you
pervert: also
pervert: the problem is he's so attractive that if i imagine him as a dog it will still be cute
shit eater: imagine him as a wet dog
pervert: ew thats gross
shit eater: exactly ;)
shit eater: WONWOO STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY MAID CAFE
pervert: ur maid cafe?
shit eater: in minecraft
bruh: seungkwan says he wants to see it
shit eater: why dont you add him to the chat
bruh: his roommate cracked his phone screen so he doesn't have it rn
shit eater: Dang
bruh: he gave me his number tho
bruh: he says yall are funny
bruh: he also said he thinks jun needs serious help
shit eater: YK WHAT DONT ADD HIM
shit eater: EVERYONE IN THIS CHAT JUST BULLIES ME
shit eater: THIS ISNT THE TAX FRAUD SQUAD THIS IS THE "LETS ALL BULLY JUN SQUAD"
edgelord named the chat: Let's All Bully Jun Squad
shit eater: THIS IS ACTUALLY CYBERBULLYING
bruh: deserved
shit eater: WHY AM I FRIENDS WITH ANY OF YOU
edgelord: cause no one else can deal with your shit
shit eater: yk what
shit eater: that is a Valid Point
single: wait i love that chat name
shit eater: YOU WOULD YOU ROACH
single: ROACH?????
shit eater: YES
shit eater: THE WAY YOU SKITTER SKITTER AROUND LIKE A ROACH
shit eater: I COULD SQUISH YOU WITH MY FOOT
shit eater: ROACHHAO
single: OK SHITHUI
shit eater: hey you calling me that is kinda....hot
shit eater: what if we made out rn ;)
single: die!!!!!!!!! :)))))))
shit eater: </3
pervert: sooo... i made a fool out of myself
angel: BAHAHAHAHAHA YALL LOOK
angel: [one video attachment] ( video of joshua going up to talk to Cute Boy but falling on his face, jeonghan cackling in the bg)
angel: HIS SHOELACE WAS UNTIED IM CRYING
shit eater: JAKAKJSKSNSN
bruh: F
edgelord: F
single: F
pervert: :(
angel: THATS NOT EVEN THE BEST PART
angel: HE WAS INTRODUCING HIMSELF AND THEN HE SCREAMED HAKUNA CAUSE HE REMEMBERED " hakuna his tatas"
shit eater: GAHAHAHHHSHAHSHG
bruh: double F
edgelord: triple F
single: lmfao quadruple F
pervert: ITS NOT FUNNY GUYS
pervert: HE THINKS MY NAME IS JOSHAKUNA
shit eater: BAHAHAHAHA
pervert: ITS NOT FUNNY
shit eater: ok joshakuna ;)
shit eater changed pervert's name to joshakuna
joshakuna: >>>:(((
bruh: seungkwan says joshakuna is a beautiful name
joshakuna: tell him thanks
bruh: he says "it was sarcasm :/"
joshakuna: HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW ME AND HES ALREADY BULLYING ME
edgelord: he would fit right in
single: good friend choice vernon
bruh: i told yall im not socially awkward
bruh: its not even in my Dicktionary™
joshakuna: your what now?
bruh: Dicktionary™
shit eater: its a better version of the dictionary created by the gc
single: it has a drawing of Shakespeares penis on the front
joshakuna: how do you know what that looks like
single: fossils ;)
angel: it features words like "bussy"
shit eater: I SAID BUSSY ONE TIME
angel: ITS NOT EVEN THE FACT THAT YOU SAID IT
angel: ITS THE FACT THAT YOU SAID IT WHILE REFERRING TO YOUR CAT
shit eater: I NEVER TALKED ABOUT CAT BUSSY
bruh: isn't your cat a female?
angel: thats why it was so confusing
shit eater: i literally never said that
angel: you did :/
shit eater: whatever im going back to my maid cafe
shit eater is offline
edgelord: im gonna set fire to said maid cafe
single: wait i wanna play minecraft with yall too :(
edgelord: we can burn down the maid cafe together
single: ok but only cause i feel like that one villager rachel keeps trying to hit on jun
edgelord is offline
single is offline
bruh: i better get back to class
bruh: bye
bruh is offline
joshakuna: so...hows life?
angel is offline
joshakuna: OH FOR FUCKS SAKE WHY IS EVERYONE SO MEAN TO ME ????
Let's All Bully Jun Squad
4;online Dec 10, 2:34pm
single: these cat laser thingies are fake smh
furry: what?
single: yk the ones where the cat is supposed to like try and catch the laser
furry: oh those
furry: how is it fake
single: im pointing it at juns face and the cat isn't doing anything
bruh: why do you want the cat to attack your boyfriend
single: Entertainment
angel: ill never understand people in relationships
bruh: but you're in a relationship
angel: that part is irrelevant
bruh: :/
single: this was a waste of $6
single: now im sad
single: and bored
furry: you could watch porn?
single: im bored not horny :/
furry: sometimes its the same thing
single: :/
single: oh shit wait
furry: what
single: OH NO
single: oh shit what did i just do
angel: what happened????
single: JUNS DICK IS BLEEDING *@????)($)
bruh: HUH
angel: oml
single: THIS STUPID CAT LASER ARAGAGAGR
furry: what? did the cat laser chop off his dick?
single: more like the cat
single: i think we have to go to the ER
single is offline
bruh: wtf just happened
furry: wait im still confused
furry: did the cat chop off his dick or the laser
angel: just another day in this hellhole of a gc
Let's All Bully Jun Squad
5;online Dec 10, 4:00pm
shit eater: guess whos back from the ER :)
edgelord: this is like the second time within two weeks :/
joshakuna: what happened?
shit eater: my cat shredded my dick off
joshakuna: WHAT
shit eater: jk
shit eater: she just scratched it
shit eater: like alot
shit eater: doctor says it might scar ;)
joshakuna: HOW DID THIS HAPPEN
single: its kinda my fault
joshakuna: you told the cat to scratch his dick?
shit eater: no? not really?
shit eater: i had one of those cat laser things and the cat really didn't care about it
shit eater: then i dropped it and it pointed at juns crotch
shit eater: and the cat attacked it
edgelord: oml
shit eater: they put bandaids on it
shit eater: it felt so weird that even i couldn't get off to it
shit eater: and i get off to pretty much everything ;)
edgelord: tmi :/
shit eater: also no sexual anything until the wound heals
shit eater: THATS LIKE 3 WEEKS OF NO ACTION AT ALL
shit eater: IM GONNA BE HORNY FOR AN ENTIRE MONTH ;-;
bruh: Dang with a capital D
edgelord: were the cuts deep?
shit eater: not really
shit eater: the doctor said i should be fine to use my dick after the scratches heal
shit eater: on the plus side i get a dick scar
edgelord: how is that a plus
edgelord: the only people who see your dick know you got the scar from your cat
shit eater: dont ruin this for me ;-;
shit eater: i already cant masturbate >:(
edgelord: :/
shit eater: AND HAO
shit eater: dont think im not mad at you >:(
shit eater: just because i love you does not mean i will be fine with you taking away masturbation from me >>:(((
single: :/
single: uh huh
single: says the man who is literally kissing my face :/
shit eater: >>>:((( IM STILL GONNA KISS YOUR FACE
shit eater: EVEN IF IM MAD
shit eater: YOU HAVE A VERY CUTE FACE
single: stop >:( ur gonna make me embarrassed
shit eater: deserved >:(
single: no >:>
shit eater: DONT MAKE THAT FACE IM GONNA CRY
single: >:>
shit eater: *head in hands*
bruh: are you guys still at the ER?
single: nah were at home
single: we both skipped dance so soons isnt gonna be happy
shit eater: he might laugh at my dick scar-
single: its not a dick scar
shit eater: yet. its not a dick scar yet.
bruh: for some reason this reminds me of the time jihoon dropped a wax strip on his dick
bruh: and kept it there for like half a year cause he was scared to take it off
joshakuna: NOOOOOOO
shit eater: THAT WAS SO FUNNY
shit eater: ESPECIALLY CAUSE IT STILL HURT WHEN HE HAD TO TAKE IT OFF
shit eater: HE ACTUALLY CRIED
bruh: it was the first time id seen any emotion from him besides angry
bruh: or emotionally constipated
shit eater: SO TRUE
single: jun the doctor said we have to change the bandaids every two hours-
shit eater: but we only have Thomas bandaids....
single: oh well :/
shit eater: YOU ARE NOT PUTTING THOMAS THE TRAIN BANDAIDS ON MY DICK FOR FUCKS SAKE
single: im not going out to buy more
single: and its gross if you dont change it
shit eater: fine >:(
shit eater: BUT only the ones with james on them
shit eater: hes my fav
shit eater: he has so much self-love
shit eater: hes an icon
single: oml fine :/
single is offline
shit eater is offline
joshakuna: i wanna know why they only have Thomas bandaids
bruh: cause hao used to be an emily the train kinnie-
edgelord: dear god not that again
joshakuna: 💀
Let's All Bully Jun Squad
7;online Dec 15, 5:00pm
shit eater: guys
shit eater: i just realized the scratches on my dick kinda look like a hashtag
single: really?
single: i thought it looked more like a plus sign
furry: no way
furry: it was defo a heart shape
bruh: um no
bruh: it was a smiley face
child: yall are all wrong
child: it was a minion shape :/
child: specifically the one with one eye
edgelord: OK WE GET IT
edgelord: HE HAS A PICCASO LEVEL MASTERPIECE ON HIS DICK
shit eater: jealousy is a disease bitch
edgelord: why would i be jealous?
edgelord: i can put underwear on without crying :/
shit eater: YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP
shit eater: IT FUCKIN HURTS OK
edgelord: :/
shit eater: honestly do you know how unnerving it is to look down at your dick
shit eater: AND SEE PERCY THE TRAIN SMILING AT YOU???
child: jun canceled for having a children's show on his dick
shit eater: ITS THE ONLY BANDAIDS WE HAVE
child: thats what they all say
child: and then youre jacking off to percy pics at 1 am
child: and then you read percy x reader fanfic
child: and then you buy a percy body pillow
child: and you read train porn
child: you might even write thomas x percy mpreg fanfic
shit eater: STOP IT STOP IT NOW
edgelord: WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK CHAN??????
shit eater: TRAINS CANT GET PREGNANT
child: how do you know
shit eater: THEY ARE VEHICLES???
child: then explain to me how cars are made if vehicles cant get pregnant
furry: are you high rn?
shit eater: i really thought you would be the one to save us all chan
edgelord: where did the jacking off to percy pics come from?
child: oh well minghao does it with kermit
child: he jacks off to kermit pics
child: he said he especially liked the one muppet movie where kermit wears a suit
child: he called him froggie daddy
single: I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU CHAN
furry: FROGGIE DADDY???
shit eater: I KNEW YOU FOUND THE FROG PORN HOT
single: SHUT UP NO I DIDINT
edgelord: furry
single: YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP
single: YOU HORNDOG
edgelord: WHAT
single: DONT THINK I DONT SEE YOU
single: TEXTING ME HORNY THOUGHTS ABOUT A CERTAIN SOMEONE
edgelord: THERE NOT HORNY THOUGHTS
single: " can he choke me please?" UM CHILE
edgelord: SHUT UP YOU FROG FUCKER
furry: WHAT WHOS CHOCKING YOU???
edgelord: NO ONE
single: " mega big dick energy" - wonwoo
edgelord: ACTUALLY DIE
shit eater: whos dick is big?
shit eater: is it mine?
edgelord: WHY WOULD I HAVE HORNY THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU????
shit eater: cause im super hot :/
edgelord: YOUR FACE COULD NEVER MAKE MY DICK WET
edgelord: EVER
edgelord: IVE SEEN YOU EAT YOUR BOOGERS
shit eater: yeah when i was like 6?
edgelord: IT WAS YESTERDAY?????
shit eater: that part is irrelevant
shit eater: also i was suffocating
shit eater: i had too many boogers i couldn't breathe
furry: bro that happens to me too
shit eater: ugh i hate it
child: GUYS
child: I FOUND A PERCY BODY PILLOW
shit eater: dont-
child: im getting this for your b-day
shit eater: DONT
single: IM NOT GONNA LET A FUCKING TRAIN REPLACE ME
single: HOW AM I GONNA GET CUDDLES IF HES HUGGING A FUCKING TRAIN
shit eater: on second thought buy it
single: UR SO MEAN
single: NO CUDDLES FOR YOU EVER AGIAN>>:((((((
shit eater: bet >>>:((((
furry: ahem
furry: some of us are single :/
single: how is that my problem
furry: r00d >:((
shit eater: u could get yo mans
furry: my mans that is very much straight ;)
single: HE LITERALLY HAS GAY PORN MAGS IN HIS STUDIO
furry: THOSE ARE MINE
single: oh really?
single: you haven't noticed how the pile is GETTING BIGGER?????
furry: IDK I THINK I BOUGHT THOSE????
single: ARE YOU FUCKING SURE ABOUT THAT???
furry: YEAH????
single: REALLY???
furry: STOP TRYING TO CONVINCE ME HES NOT STRAIGHT
single: HOW ARE YOU THIS DENSE?????
furry: IM NOT DENSE ITS JUST SO OBVIOUS HES STRAIGHT
child: wait who are we talking about
shit eater: who holds the title of "The Straightest Person Here"?
child: OH HIM
child: wait
child: YOU LIKE HIM??????
child: PFFFF
furry: SHUT UP
child: HOLD UP THIS IS SO FUNNY
furry: NO DIE
child: IM SORRY BUT YALL TOGETHER IS SO FUNNY TO ME
furry: yk what
furry: if jeonghan didn't care so much about ur dumb ass i would drop kick you rn
child: :p loser
furry: >:(
child: no but fr
child: you really have a crush on him?
furry: sadly yes
child: Dang with a capital D
furry: I Feel In Love with A Straight Man- my life story
shit eater: ugh stop making the chat so depressing with ur Sad Gay Life
furry: YOU WERE THE EXACT SAME WAY WITH MINGHAO
shit eater: UM BUT I KNEW THAT MF WAS AS GAY AS THEY CAME
single: :/
shit eater: SHUT UP YOU KNOW YOU LITERALLY RADIATE GAY ENERGY
shit eater: YOU SHIT RAINBOWS
single: YOU ARE RAINBOW SHIT
shit eater: WHY THANK YOU
single: THAT WASNT A COMPLIMENT
child: ugh stop being so gay in the gc guys
furry: chan dont be homophobic
child: IM NOT BEING HOMOPHOBIC
shit eater: chan canceled for being homophobic in gc full of gay ppl
child: IM LITERALLY BI??????
shit eater: you can be gay and homophobic
child: BUT IM NOT HOMOPHOBIC
furry: WHAT ABOUT THE LOOKS YOU GIVE JEONGHAN AND CHEOL
child: ITS SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT
child: FROM WHEN CHEOL CALLS JEONGHAN "ANGEL" IN PUBLIC
shit eater: hmmmmm
furry: sus :/
child: IM NOT A HOMOPHOBE I SWEAR
child: I LOVE GAY PPL <333
single: and now ur fetishizing???
child: STOP NO IM NOT
shit eater: wow chan i didn't know you were like this
child: STOP IM GONNA CRY
child: FR
shit eater: PFFFFFFFF
furry: BAHAHAHAHAHSHS
furry: anyways i gotta go practice at the dance studio
furry: later losers :p
furry is offline
shit eater: so @single can i hakuna ur tatas
single: ...
single: no
single: well...
shit eater: ;)
single: ugh fine
child: literally why
child: i really didn't need to see that
shit eater: dont be homophobic chan
child is offline
shit eater: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
single: are you gonna come or....?
shit eater: IM COMING
single is offline
shit eater is offline
The Responsible Ones™
4;online Dec 15, 5:26 pm
hoon: fuck my life
cheol: woah woah woah woah (AN: lets pump it up)
cheol: calm down
shua: whats up
hoon: im at the dance studio watching soonyoung practice
hoon: Its very Hot
hoon: im Hornay™
hoon: and i crave death
shua: WAIT
shua: UR GAY???
won: honey no one in the chat has a straight cell in them
shua: )())*(*(* WHAT
won: why is that surprising
shua: NO ITS NOT THAT
shua: ITS THAT SOONYOUNG IS CONVINCED YOURE STRAIGHT JIHOON??
hoon: well soonyoung is straight so that makes sense
shua: SOONYOUNG IS STRAIGHT IN WHAT FUCKING UNIVERSE???
won: dont bother trying
won: its a waste of time
shua: SOONYOUNG STRAIGHT IS LIKE MY WORST NIGHTMARE
shua: WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT HIM STRAIGHT I IMAGINE HIM DOING TIKTOK POVS
shua: POV: im ur hot stepbro and then we fuck in a closet and fall in love but our parents are married oopsie
cheol: i vomited a little im my mouth ngl
won: HES GAY AND HE MAKES TIKTOK POVS
shua: EVERYTHING IS SCARIER WHEN A STRAIGHT PERSON DOES IT
hoon: i love how we forgot about my very important problem
cheol: i didn't forget i just never cared
won: DANG
shua: why do we have so many savages here?
hoon: RAGAARAAGAGAG GRRR BARK AKDHJKDFKJLF
hoon: HE JUST BODY ROLLED PREPARE MY COFFIN
shua: :/
hoon: HE SMIRKED KSKDLKJKSJKLJD??S?#()*$)%
won: can confirm: soonyoung has a pretty hot smirk
hoon: ARAGARATGHSJDJ
hoon: IF I LEAVE TO SCREAM MY LUNGS OUT WILL HE GET SUSPICIOUS???
cheol: he hasn't noticed you adding porn mags to his pile so prob not
cheol: hes pretty unobservant :/
hoon: ATAGSGJSDKKDJF
hoon is offline
shua: dang it
shua: i bought a new dildo three sizes too big
cheol: how did you-
shua: idk i prob got distracted so i clicked the wrong button
won: why are you telling us this?
shua: idk in case anyone wants a mega-sized dildo?????
won: ...how big
shua: ....ill dm a pic
cheol: wonwoo size queen??
won: SHUT THE FUCK UP FURRY
won: IM NOT
cheol: sus :/
shua: speaking of furries
shua: are you working on that next chapter of your sonic x knuckles fanfic?
cheol: NOOO AHAHAH WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT???? PFFFFF
shua: dang i thought updates where every other day
cheol: you're......reading it?
shua: yeah
shua: who knew you were so good i writing hedgehog porn
cheol: ...
cheol: whats ur username
shua: uh
shua: UnicornSparklePrincess0046
cheol: BAHHAHAHAHAJAJJS
shua: SHUT THE HELL UP
cheol: its not as bad as jihoons old tiktok username
shua: i think i made it that so that no one would get suspicious that im a twenty-something-year-old man
shua: reading sonic fanfic
cheol: no one is judging you shua
cheol: i mean im the one writing it
shua: that means alot from someone who killed Amy off in ch 3
cheol: SHE WAS RUINING THE STORY HE THROWS THE VIBES OF KILTER
won: UR OLD ASS DID NOT JUST SAY OFF KILTER
cheol: SHUT UP FUCK YOU
shua: YOU JUST THOUGHT THAT A SONIC/KNUCKLES/SHADOW THREESOME WAS HOTTER
cheol: AND WHAT IF I DID
shua: THIS IS AMY SLANDER????
won: why is it that were always talking about animals having sex here? like??
shua: literally think about the hedgehog foursomes that coulda happened cheol
cheol: dear god
won: the fact is that sentence aint even the worst thing anyone has ever texted around here
shua: round here 🤠🤠🤠
won: HAHA DIE 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
cheol: wait
cheol: is jihoon ok?
shua: oh i forgot about him lmao
won: did he die?
shua: @hoon are you ok
cheol: @hoon @hoon @hoon
won: hes dead
Let's All Bully Jun Squad
7;online Dec 15, 5:47pm
furry: GUYS
furry: I THINK JIHOON DIED
edgelord: knew it
furry: I WAS JUST DANCING AND THEN HE JUST FLOPPED ON THE FLOOR
shit eater: lmao is he breathing
furry: IDK
angel: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DONT KNOW?????
angel: WHAT WERE YOU EVEN DOING?????
furry: I SWEAR I WAS JUST DANCING
single: YOU KILLED HIM SOONYOUNG
furry: IM A MURDERER
furry: AM I GONNA GO TO JAIL
bruh: i cant believe jihoon died
bruh: he had such a long life ahead
furry: TAKE ME WITH YOU
furry: I DESERVE TO DIE AS WELL
single: WHAT DANCE MOVE WERE YOU EVEN DOING
single: THE GRENADE LAUNCH????
furry: um i grinded on the floor
shit eater: WELL THAT EXPLAINS IT
furry: WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT EXPLAINS IT???????
child: the gay killed him
single: lmao he died of horniness
furry: GAY? HES STRAIGHT THO
furry: WHAT DO YOU MEAN HORNY?????
furry: DO I HAVE TO GIVE HIM MOUTH TO MOUTH??
shit eater: do it
edgelord: thats prob his first kiss
shit eater: DAMN OK WONWOO NO NEED TO BE SO SHADY
furry: GUYS THIS ISNT FUNNY
single: it really is
furry: NO ITS NOT WHAT IF HE DIES
furry: WAIT
furry: HES ALIVE
single: HE NEVER DIED
furry: HE PRETENDED TO DIE
furry: I WAS ACTUALLY CRYING
small mf is online
small mf: hi
furry: DONT JUST COME BACK FROM THE DEAD AND SAY HI???
furry: HOW DARE YOU (ALMOST) DIE ON ME
small mf: i didn't die
small mf: it was pretty obvious i was alive
small mf: i pretty much holding in laughter the entire time
furry: I THOUGHT THAT WAS A FIGMENT OF MY IMAGINATION
small mf: you were so worried you were gonna get convicted
small mf: it was so funny
furry: MY FRIENDSHIP WITH YOU = ENDED >:(
small mf: and then you started screaming at the sky "take me too, i wont let jihoon suffer alone"
single: how romantic ;)
furry: WAGAHAHSJSKS????????
small mf: ...no
joshakuna: anyways im going to deliver this dildo
shit eater: HUH
shit eater: WHOS GETTING A DILDO
edgelord: idk who could it be :/
joshakuna: its wonwoo
shit eater: BAGAGAHAHAJAJJSJD
edgelord: SHUT UP AT LEAST I CAN USE IT UNLIKE YOU
edgelord: YOU HAVE BLUE BALLS UNTIL THE END OF THE MONTH
shit eater: YEAH BUT WHEN I CAN USE MY DICK AGAIN I CAN HAVE A REAL DICK
shit eater: NOT JUST DILDOS
edgelord: ...
shit eater: YOU CANT SAY ANYTHING TO THAT
shit eater: single loser :p
edgelord: anyways
edgelord: i havent seen your maid cafe in a while
edgelord: hows it been?
shit eater: YOU FUCKER YOU BLEW IT UP
shit eater: IM GONNA DESTROY YOU
edgelord: sorry cant talk rn im doing hot girl shit :)
shit eater: YOU BITCH LETS FIGHT IRL
edgelord: >:) ok
shit eater: LETS DO IT AT THE ABANDONED K-MART WITH RATS IN IT
edgelord: bet yo skinny ass
shit eater: YOU CANT EVEN KILL COCKROACHES
edgelord: BITCH NEITHER CAN YOU
edgelord: YOU LITERALLY CRY UNTIL MINGHAO DOES IT FOR YOU
shit eater: AT LEAST I HAVE A BOYFRIEND TO DO IT FOR ME
edgelord: >>>>:((((( OK LETS GO RN IM READY
shit eater: LETS GO
edgelord is offline
shit eater is offline
bruh: place your bets
bruh: who's gonna win?
single: jun
small mf: wonwoo
angel: wonwoo
father: jun
child: jun
furry: wonwoo
joshakuna: wonwoo
tall mf is online
tall mf: um whats happening i heard jun and wonwoo yelling
bruh: read up
tall mf: oh no
tall mf: also
tall mf: um i vote wonwoo
single: you would choose him >:(
furry: please
furry: you only chose jun cause youre a simp
single: >:(
small mf: are they really gonna fight?
father: at this point
father: probably
Let's all Bully Jun Squad
6;online Dec 16, 3:00 pm
furry: GUYS I THINK HE REALLY DIED THIS TIME
shit eater: im kinda in the middle of my K-Mart Fight
edgelord: yeah were kinda busy
single: shut up both of you
single: all youre doing is blasting bitch lasagna for some godforsaken reason
shit eater: YEAH BUT WE DID FIGHT
father: no you didn't
joshakuna: yall both too pussy to actually fight
edgerlod: WE DID FIGHT
edgelord: JUN CRIED
shit eater: CAUSE YOU THREATENED TO CHOP OFF MY DICK
shit eater: I LITERALLY HAD FLASHBACKS FROM WHEN MY CAT ATTACKED ME
edgelord: BLAME IT ON UR BF NOT ME
furry: GUYS SHUT THE FUCK UP JIHOON DIED FR THIS TIME
single: no he didn't
furry: YES HE DID
furry: @father COME HERE PLEASE HES DEAD
father: omw lmao
child: WHAT DID YOU DO TO KILL HIM THIS TIME????????
furry: MY DANCE ROUTINE????
single: wait
single: the one for that sexy song??
furry: YEAH
single: oh yeah
single: hes dead
child: Damn RIP
shit eater: fly high </3
furry: YOU GUYS HE MIGHT BE DEAD
father: hes breathing soonyoung calm down
angel: damn i was looking forward to going to the hospital again
shit eater: why
angel: theres this one hot doctor...
father: ....:(
father: i see how it is :((((
father: :"((((
angel: OH SHUT UP I LOVE YOU MORE THAN HOT DOCTORS
joshakuna: please cheol yk he has a thing for hot doctors
father: we could roleplay???
angel: OH MY FUCK THATS HOT
angel: LETS DO IT
joshakuna: dang i would like to see Dr.Choi
joshakuna: that would be super hot
father: threesome?
joshakuna: ...yes
father: dont worry you can be Dr.Choi's patient as well ;)
angel: AAGAYTATAHHSH DR.CHOI
joshakuna: I WOULD VERY MUCH LIKE TO BE A PATIENT
angel: I CANT BE HORNY IN THE LIBRARY
angel: FUCK YOU CHEOL
joshakuna: YEAH IM AT THE FUCKING STORE
father: ;)
furry: BE HORNY LATER GUYS
furry: JIHOON IS DEAD
angel: ugh you would look so hot in a doctors coat
angel: AHHHHH YOU WOULD LOOK SO HOT IM DYING
angel: NOT ON THE SURGERY TABLE*EUU*#*EIUOIEOUIU
joshakuna: not even Dr.Choi can save jeonghan
father: we could use bandages for bondage
angel: IM GONNA MURDER YOU
furry: OH FOR FUCKS SAKE GUYS
furry: JIHOON IS DEAD
furry: WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO BROS BEFORE HOES
father: dont worry Dr.Choi is here to help ;)
furry: PLEASE DO NOT
angel: FUCKITY FUCK FKUCK
joshakuna: wait
joshakuna: we could also use bandages for blindfolding
angel: YESSSSSSSSSSSSS
shit eater: jesus even im never this horny in the gc
angel: THATS A LIE
angel: YOU WERE EVEN HORNIER WHEN YOU STARTED THINKING ABOUT MIRROR SEX WITH MINGHAO
shit eater: SGUT THE FUKC UP I CANT BE HORNY RN IF I GET A BONER IT WILL HURT
single: mirror sex?
shit eater: WE'LL TALK ABOUT IT LATER
single: ...
father: jihoon is ok
father: he just fainted hes alright
joshakuna: Dr.Choi saves the day
angel: FUCKING SHIT STOP IM IN CLASS I CANT LEAVE
angel: MY TEACHER ALREADY GOT MAD AT ME FOR SCREAMING ONCE
furry: why did he faint?
shit eater: in the choreo you floor grind and then like feel urself up and down right?
furry: yeah?
shit eater: thats why
joshakuna: the devil works hard but soonyoung works harder
furry: HUH THAT DOESNT MAKE SENSE
furry: WHY WOULD HE DIE???
angel: YES DOCTOR I WOULD LIKE MY CHECK-UP
angel: shit wrong chat
joshakuna: you had one job :/
angel: SHUT EHT FUVK UP IM REALLY HORNY RN
furry: this is probably the horniest i have seen you up to date
angel: YOU WOULD BE LIKE THIS IF JIHOON WORE A DOCTORS OUTFIT AND SAID HE WAS DR.LEE
furry: HOLY FUKC
edgelord: please do not start talking abt this
shit eater: WHAT ABOUT DR.KIM HUH
shit eater: YOU WOULD BE ALL OVER THAT
edgelord: jiewi9i390u495owjofjeusjs
edgelord: does not compute
shit eater: HE WOULD KILL YOU IF HE WORE A DOCTORS COAT
edgelord: STOP STOP STOP IT NOW
shit eater: YOU SHOULD ASK HIM IF HE'LL DO IT
edgelord: over my dead body
shit eater: nah cause Dr.Kim wouldn't let you die
edgelord: die <3
angel: UGH
angel: I STILL HAVE MORE CLASSES
angel: I JUST WANNA GO VISIT DR.CHOI
single: where is our one voice of reason??
joshakuna: buying a doctors coat
child: wait im still confused
child: is dr.choi a new doctor
child: can i visit them?? i think i actually have a cough
angel: GET AWAY FROM DR.CHOI
angel: HE BELONGS TO ME AND JOSHUA ONLY
father: Dr.Choi treats all his patients equally ;)
angel: NO NO NO NO STOP PLEASE I CANT DO THIS RN
angel: I HAVE TO GO TO CLASS
child: oh
child: its just another one of jeonghans sexual fantasies
edgelord: there's others?
child: oh ig you weren't there for Mr.Choi
child: it was his hot teacher fantasy
child: or King Choi
child: i dont wanna explain that one
angel: AGGGGHHHHSHHD
small mf is online
small mf: hi
furry: GET OFF YOUR PHONE YOU JUST DIED
small mf: im fine
furry: YOU JUST FAINTED YOURE NOT SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT A SCREEN
small mf: Dr.Choi said it was fine
furry: HES NOT A REAL DOCTOR
small mf: eh
small mf: and anyway
small mf: why do you care so much
furry: YOU JUST DIED????
furry: also you're my friend :(
furry: i should be allowed to care
The Responsible Ones™
4;online Dec 16, 3: 27 pm
cheol: gotta love soonyoung friend-zoning jihoon in front of everyone lmao
hoon: shut the hell up
shua: Dang
won: why do you act like an angsty teenager all the time jihoon
won: "why do you care so much"
won: all you need is the fringe lmao
hoon: stop
cheol: i remember the time when jihoon told me
cheol: his father told him
cheol: "would you be the savior of the broken, the beaten, and the damned?"
hoon: i never said that
cheol: yes you did
cheol: and then you said
cheol: " sometimes i get the feeling, she's watching over me"
shua: who? ur grandma?
won: jihoon trying to be the coolest challenge: failed
hoon: ur misery and hate will kill us all
cheol: what did i tell you
cheol: sometimes he just quotes it randomly
hoon: shut up MCR is cool
shua: and i thought wonwoo was the emo one
hoon: oh he is
hoon: that bitch listens to MCR, twenty-one pilots, panic at the disco, AND fall out boy
won: SHUT UP EMO MUSIC IS COOL
shua: but vernon listens to twenty pilots too tho
hoon: but he also listens to troye sivan so im not that concerned
won: IS NO ONE GONNA COMMENT ON CHEOLS OBSESSIVE ASHNIKKO LISTENING HABITS
cheol: ashnikko is good music
won: SO IS PANIC AT THE DISCO
cheol: debatable
won: YOU HAVE LISTENED TO HIGH HOPES AT LEAST ONE TIME IN YOUR LIFE
cheol: but did i enjoy it??? :/
won: im not having this convo with you rn
shua: it has been exactly 4 mins since jihoon left soonyoung on the main chat
hoon: oh shit
won: lmao
Let's all Bully Jun Squad
6;online Dec 16, 3:14 pm
furry: jihoon?
furry: we are friends right? :(
small mf: yeah ofc
furry: :)
angel: oml this is painful
shit eater: not as painful as my dick sractch
single: not as painful as jun digging his nails into my ass for some reason rn
shit eater: im trying to find your ass :/
single: ur literally touching it??
shit eater: there has to be more ass somewhere??? no ones ass is this flat??
furry: LMAO
single: this is literally cyberbullying
edgelord: deserved
single: shut up nip licker
edgelord: WHAT
single changed edgelords name to nip licker
nip licker: NO
single: you texted me that you tried to lick ur own nipples
nip licker: I NEVER SAID THAT
bruh: dont do that ur gonna get scoliosis
single: LMAOAOAOAOA
nip licker: I NEVER SAID THAT EVER YOU LIAR
shit eater: anyway go follow wonwoos twt @mantiddiethinker
nip licker: STOP
tall mf: why are you thinking about tiddies?
nip licker: IM NOT
shit eater: yesterday he said his fave food was Juicy Pecs
nip licker: LITERALLY KYS
shit eater: omg calm down its not that serious :/
nip licker: IM GOING TO DESTROY YOU
shit eater: no thanks youre not my type
nip licker: CHEOL HES BULLYING ME
father: jun stop bullying people
father: wonwoo stop being horny and emo
father: minghao stop having such a flat ass for gods sake
father: jihoon stop being angsty
father: soonyoung do not buy that fursuit (i saw it in ur search history)
father: chan please stop trying to seduce your math teacher
father: vernon spray Febreze or SOMETHING after you smoke
father: AND FOR FUCKS SAKE JEONGHAN AND JOSH STOP TALKING ABOUT HENTAI IN THE 95 LINE GC
nip licker: omg hes on his last rope yall
tall mf: i didnt do anything bad right?
father: not yet :/
small mf: why can you see soonyoungs search history
father: i turned on parental controls
father: ever since he watched porn on a SCHOOL COMPUTER and broke the entire fucking computer lab
furry: it wasnt even good porn
single: i cant stop having a flat ass??
shit eater: i mean you could? you could get implants? you could squat a lot?
shit eater: DO IT >:)
single: this is peer pressure :/
angel: CHAN WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO SEDUCE YOUR MATH TEACHER?????
child: HES RICH??? I WANT A SUGAR DADDY??? HES HOT???
angel: DONT SELL YOUR SELF TO SOME DIRTY OLD MAN
child: HES ONLY 37???
angel: jail
child: IM A LEGAL ADULT???
angel: cheol could be your sugar daddy?
child: THATS JUST WRONG JEONGHAN WTF??
child: HES MY PARENTAL FIGURE???
angel: yeah so you could call him daddy ;)
child: YOU SICK FUCK HES MY ACTUAL DAD
father: jeonghan stop im going to cry
angel: omg no :(
single: omg chan ur trying to seduce him too?
single: omg Seducing Squad
shit eater: THATS WHY YOU GET SO DRESSED UP
shit eater: I THOUGHT YOU WERE DOING JUST TO MAKE MY NO DICK LIFE HARDER
furry: #NoDickLife
nip licker change shit eaters name to #NoDickLife
#NoDickLife: fuck everyone here
single: if you cant do it someone else can :/
#NoDickLife: THIS IS BULLYING
#NoDIckLife: IM LITERALLY RICH TOO??
single: oh shit thats right lmao
#NoDickLife: I BOUGHT YOU A ROLEX YESTERDAY??? YOU UNGRATEFUL ROACH???
single: oops i forgot? :)
#NoDickLife: YOU FUCKER IM NEVER GIVING YOU ANYTHING EVER AGAIN
furry: omg jun sugar daddy?
single: my daddy gets me the bestest things :)
#NoDickLife: OMG SHUT THE FUCK UP
nip licker: i think he likes it yall :/
single: uwu I've been a vwery bad boy o3o
nip licker: BHAHAJSJ
#NoDickLife: omg wonwoo size queen?
nip licker: no shut up
single: omg jun daddy kink?
#NoDickLife: please die loml <3 :))
furry: NOT LOML LMAOAOAOAO
single: jun its ok :) no one is shaming you :)
#NoDickLife: omg minghao praise kink?
single: NO
furry: thats why you make that face when he praises ur dancing lmao
single: SHUT UP NO I DONT
angel: wait guys
angel: wheres josh
furry: i forgot about him
father: werent you watching anime porn with him?
angel: yeah on the roof but then he ran away?
father: ??
bruh: i just saw him bolt past me
angel: huh?
bruh: i think hes being chased?
angel: HUH?
bruh: idk whats happening lmao im just tryna smoke :/
Let's all Bully Jun Squad
6;online Dec 16, 3:29pm
bruh: can confirm
bruh: josh is being chased rn
angel: HUH???
bruh: idk man im on the roof
bruh: hes being chased around the school
bruh: by some guy with a nice ass
tall mf: GUYS I THINK MY FISH DIED
#NoDickLife: you have a fish?
angel: your fish is not important
angel: josh is being chased by Nice Ass Man
furry: THERE ALL OUT OF NORMAL DORITOS AT THE STORE >:((((((
furry: ONLY THE nAsTY rANCh ONES
small mf: the fuck
small mf: ranch is good??
angel: NOT IMPORTANT
angel: JOSH IS BEING CHASED BY A MURDERER WITH A NICE ASS
bruh: i never said it was a murderer
angel: WHY ELSE IS HE BEING CHASED???
bruh: tax fraud?
nip licker: I HAVE TO BUY THE REST OF 90 DAY FIANCE
nip licker: THESE FUCKING SCAMMERS
furry: WHAT??
furry: THIS IS BLAPHSAMANAY
small mf: thats not how you spell it??
furry: DONT TRY AND PHOTOSYNTHESIZE ME RN JIHOON
angel: JOSHUA??? IS ???BEING??CHASED???BY??THE??GOVERNMENT??
small mf: why does the story keep changing?
angel: cause im still not entirely sure why hes being chased?
child: MY MATH TEACHER KICKED ME OUT OF CLASS :(((((
child: ALL I DID WAS CALL HIM DADDY??
single: HUH???
angel: OMG THIS CAN NOT BE HAPPENING RN
bruh: joshua just jumped over an old lady
angel: WHAT??
bruh: guys im gonna insta live this rq
bruh: find it @dildobutter
small mf: what the fuck is that busted @
bruh: want me to expose your old tiktok username rn??
small mf: this is why i hate americans :/
bruh: lmao
#NoDickLife: GUYS
#NoDickLife: OR ACTUALLY JUST MINGHAO
#NoDickLife: ASS IMPLANTS ARE HALF OFF
single: im not getting ass implants
#NoDickLife: ok....!
angel: WHICH DILDO BUTTER ARE YOU??
small mf: ok but do you know how wrong that sounds??
bruh: the one with the jason durelo pfp
angel: why am i not following you already??
bruh: idk man
joshakuna is online
joshakuna: gsuysds imbeing chasded by the cuwte boy ffrom before
angel: OMG YOU JUST JUMPED OVER A DOG
joshakuna: i thisknk he wantsd to be my fwrienfd??
joshakuna: but he keepesd callingsed me joshaskuana
#NoDickLife: what is going on with ur typing
joshakuna: im beings chaseds asshat
joshakuna: its skidna hard to type whieleis runngin
bruh: why are you running from him?
joshakuna: idk man
angel: omg josh stop being so anti-social
joshakuna: shut up yk icant talk to atteaxtive people
#NoDickLife: so are we not attractive?
joshakuna: just you
#NoDickLife: SHUT THE FUCK UP IM VERY HANDSOME
single: guys...you know hes insecure about this :(
#NoDickLife: YOURE MY BF BUT ALL YOU DO IS BULLY ME
single: its my job :)
#NoDickLife: UR MEAN
tall mf: GUYS MY FISH ACTUALLY DIED OMG
tall mf: RICARDO :((((((
single: #flyhigh </3
small mf: did you flush him down the toilet?
tall mf: WHY WOULD I DO THAT???
tall mf: I TAKE SHITS IN THE TOILET WHY WOULD FLUSH MY ONE LOVE RICARDO DOWN THE TOILET??? >>:((
tall mf: THATS EVIL
small mf: dang ok sorry man
small mf: i didn't know you were in love with ur fish :/
tall mf: :((((
child: THE MATH TEACHER WONT LET ME BACK IN
child: I JUST WANTED A DADDY
nip licker: what the fuck is even happening
#NoDickLife: hao i just booked an appointment for ass implants
single: WHAT?? NO??
#NoDickLife: look babes i love your ass but you need help
single: THIS IS ILLEGAL??? YOU FORGED MY FUCKING SIGNATURE ???
#NoDickLife: soulmate tingz!! <33
single: JAIL
angel: JOSHUA YOU FUCKTARD GET BACK HERE AND GIVE ME MY BACKPACK
bruh: uh guys
bruh: soonyoung is walking on the edge of the roof should i be worried?
furry: IM A TIGER
single: literally you just spent $500 jun
single: AND FOR THE LAST TIME IM NOT GETTING ASS IMPLANTS
#NoDickLife: but then your twink shorts would look better
single: SINCE WHEN ARE YOU AN ASS PERSON??
#NoDickLife: I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN AN ASS PERSON
#NoDickLife: I LOVED YOU TOO MUCH TO EVER ADMIT IT
single: THATS A MIX OF THOUGHTFUL BUT ALSO RUDE AT THE SAME TIME >:(
bruh: GUYS
bruh: SOONYOUNG IS ABOUT TO FALL OFF THE BUILDING??
angel: HUH
bruh: OMG HES HANGING OFF THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING
child: SOMEONE CALL FATHER
furry: gusysd im fine :)
angel: WHAT ARE YOU TYEPING WITH??
furry: myesgd toes >:)
father is online
father: i leave for like 15 mins and soonyoung is trying to jump off a building
furry: im not >:(
furry: im beignsdhf a tiger
father: stop typing and focus on not dying
father: horanghaeshsjd
angel: JOSHUA STOP RUNNING MY ASSCHEEKS ARE ABOUT TO FALL OFF
joshakuna: try and catchsts me hoe
nip licker: why are you guys chasing each other now?
angel: joshua took my backpack with all my sex toys in it >:(
joshakuna: i ahev two people chasing me now
joshakuna: im famous
father: HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET UP THERE SOONYOUNG
furry: Tiger Powers >:)
father: cool then you can use your TIGER POWERS TO GET YOURSELF DOWN
furry: fine >:(
single: this is not going to end well
furry: oh i dont know if i can hold on for much longer doe
father: nevermind im not letting you die before you grow a pair and confess
angel: JOSHUA WHY WONT YOU MAKE FFIRNEDS??
joshakuna: becuase its stupidsjsj
joshakuna: their all just gonna leave int the end
angel: I DIDNT LEAVE YOU??
angel: STOP RUNNING FASTER
angel: YOU CNAT AVIOD ME FOREVER
child: guys my teacher said yes to being my sugar daddy
single: WHAT??? LUCKY
#NoDickLife: FUCK YOU HAO
#NoDickLife: WERE BREAKING UP
single: can i keep the rolex?
father: update
father: soonyoung is ok but he lost both of his shoes
furry: that was fun
furry: wanna do it again?
father: can i be the one who almost dies next time :/
small mf: soonyoung i found some normal doritos
small mf: do you want them?
furry: YES
furry: IM ON THE ROOF OF UR BUILDING
small mf: im not climbing up there
small mf: come down and get them urself
furry: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU
furry: I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU <33333333
small mf: uh huh
bruh: um hey
bruh: can i add my new friend?
bruh: the one from a few days ago?
angel: CHEOL COME HERE AND LET ME RIDE ON YOUR BACK YOURE A FASTER RUNNER
father: DO NOT JUMP OFF THE BUILDING SOONYOUNG
father: IDC HOW MUCH YOU WANT DORITOS YOURE TOO POOR TO PAY FOR HOSPITAL BILLS
father: also hani how am i gonna run if i have you on my back
angel: YOURE A FINE STRONG RUN MAN YOU CAN CARRY ME AND RUN AT THE SAME TIME
joshakuna: ye heis a twigs
angel: SHUT UP YOU WARTHOG
#NoDickLife: GUYS VERNON WANTS TO ADD HIS FRIEND
bruh: nah its fine
bruh: there's already a lot going on rn
joshakuna: i havegs three people chasing me now
father: jesus han cut down on the cheeto puffs for gods skae
father: it feels like im carrying a buffalo
angel: SHUT UP I WEIGH NOTHING
father: my legs are about to give out
father: tell my mother i love her
joshakuna: idk why the other dude is still chasing me
joshakuna: i literally threw a dildo at him
#NoDickLife: VERNON WANTS TO ADD HIS FRIENDS SO ACT LIKE CIVILIZED PARENTAL FIGURES AND SOLVE YOUR PROBLEMS THE RIGHT WAY
#NoDickLife: a deathmatch :)
father: huh-
angel: I CANT KILL DR.CHOI
joshakuna: calm your tits youll see each other in hell
joshakuna: after i break your ankles permanently >:)
father: joshua you cant break no ones ankles
joshakuna: wanna go?
father: try me
father: i will crickety crack ur back
joshakuna: ugh yes raw me daddy
father: huh
bruh: see? ill add him later :/
#NoDickLife: NO ADD HIM NOW
#NoDickLife: I DEMAND IT
#NoDicklife: FORGET ABOUT JOSHUA AND CHEOLS SEXUAL TENSION
bruh: dang ok
father: SEXUAL TENSION??
joshakuna: IT WAS A JOKE??
#NoDickLife: ;)
bruh added seungkwan
seungkwan changed their name to boo
boo: omg you actually added me :)
bruh: ofc :)
boo: it is truly an honor to join this cyberbullying squad
single: were so happy to have you :)
boo: OMG!! its Praise Kink Boy :) big fan :))
#NoDickLife: LMAOAOAOA
single: WHY DOES HE KNOW ABOUT THAT
bruh: ...!
father: is @boo the new guy?
boo: *tips hat* pleased to make your acquaintance
furry: what in mingyus third nipple is an aquannciacne
bruh: kwan i recommend you dont use too many big words
bruh: half of this chat cant read
furry: hey! i can read
furry: just not too many chapters
furry: the max is five :)
boo: ..im not gonna survive here
small mf: you get used to it after a while
boo: OMG! its Gay Guy Whos Thinks Hes Straight! HUGE fan!
small mf: HUH
single: SEE I WAS ATTACKED BY THIS GUY TOO
single: AND HE TOOK MY JOB OF PASSIVELY CALLING EVERYONE OUT
boo: ur just stressed cause you haven't got some in a while :)
single: HOW MUCH DO YOU KNOW????
boo: since mingyu not knowing what a clit is :)
single: oml
boo: SO! WHATS HAPPENING GUYS
child: well jeonghan is riding on cheols back chasing after joshua who had their backpack full of sexual objects
boo: oh yeah i can see them from the library window
boo: omg whos the one carrying the twig one
boo: he's kinda a hottie
joshakuna: ugh dont feed his ego
father: im hot stuff >:)
boo: nevermind you talk like a dad
boo: hottie card revoked
father: gosh dang it
angel: LMAOAOAOAOA
bruh: kwan you should do an intro :)
boo: omg i should to that :)
nip licker: WHO CHANGED MY DN ON TWT TO ¨I CARESS TIDDIES¨
single: oopsie :)
nip licker: YOU PIECE OF SHIT
#NoDickLife: ugh babe thats so evil
single: ugh babe ik im such a baddie
#NoDickLife: ugh babe thats so evil that you know ur evil
#NoDickLife: ugh what if we made out
single: ugh babe not in front of everyone
#NoDickLife: i dont care what they think
single: ugh kiss me
#NoDickLife: *saxophone noises*
small mf: i think i vomited a little in my mouth
boo: is this what normally happens here
bruh: on a good day
#NoDickLife: ugh dont be jealous
nip licker: just go back to making out no one wants you here
#NoDickLife: stfu everyone here loves me
father: ...
angel: ...
joshakuna: ...
small mf: ...
furry: ...
single: ...
child: ...
bruh: ...
boo: ...
nip licker: crickets </3
#NoDickLife: EVEN MY OWN BF??????
single: ...sorry? but not really >:)
#NoDickLife: HONESTLY I HOPE EVERYONE HERE DIES OF A BUTT RASH
boo: can i introduce myself now?
single: sorry...! we forgot about you >:)
boo: its really hard to forget me but ok :/
boo: it must be hard having brain your size :/
#NoDickLife: YEAH YOUR DICK IS BIGGER THAN YOUR BAIN
single: MY OWN BF????
#NoDickLife: revenge tastes like this old KFC chicken sandwich
bruh: guys let him introduce himself
boo: its alright
boo: obviously they need some type of couples therapy session
boo: THANK GOD IM A PSYCHOLOGY MAJOR
single: oh for fucks sake
boo: so can you tell me what the problem is?
#NoDickLife: I FELL LIKE MY OWN BOYFRIEND IS MY 5TH GRADE BULLY
single: ...
boo: can you tell me how that feels?
#NoDickLife: ITS THE WORST THING EVER
joshakuna: can we please NOT do this right now
boo: joshua dont be afraid to have feelings >:)
small mf: ugh i need a nap
small mf is offline
boo: well anyway
boo: the name is boo seungkwan im born in 98, psych major, i sing like all the time (im pretty damn good at it too), and i have a very nice ass
single: well thanks but we dont need couple therapy
#NoDickLife: YES WE DO
#NoDickLife: YOU BREAK MY HEART EVERY CHANCE YOU GET
single: CAUSE YOU FIND IT HOT
#NoDickLife: oh yeah
#NoDickLife: oopsie :)
boo: well now that we've solved that
boo: whose next >:)
joshakuna is offline
boo: MWAHAHAHAHA YOU MUST TALK ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS
nip licker: oh for fucks sake now theres a THERAPIST IN THE GC????
nip licker is offline
tall mf: um if youre actually being serious can we chat in DMs??
boo: Oh! yeah ofc :)
boo: (not sarcasm)
tall mf: :)
tall mf is offline
boo is offline
furry: THANKS VERNON NOW THERES A MIND READER IN THE GC >>>:((
bruh: what
furry: ALL THERAPISTS ARE MIND READERS >:(
furry: MINE ALWAYS KNOWS THE ANSWER BEFORE I EVEN TELL HER THE PROBLEM
bruh: ....!
father: you wanna get muscles like me? bench press a jeonghan bro
angel: I AM NOT THAT HEAVY
father: ur right
father: ur ego is prob weighing me down
angel: IS THAT HOW IT IS ????
father: >:( yes
angel: YEAH WELL STOP LEAVING UR STINKY SOCKS EVERYWHERE LOSER
father: WELL THEN YOU STOP LEAVING UR STINKY T SHIRTS EVERYWHERE
angel: WELL STOP USING ALL MY MECHANICAL PENCILS YOU ASS
father: YEAH? WELL YOU STOP BULLYING ME ALL THE TIME
angel: YEAH??? WELL YOU STOP CALLING ME A BUFFALO
angel: hmph >:(
father: hmph x2 >:(
furry: looks like we might need that couples therapy after all :/