Well, one of us lied, can’t set feelings aside, truth be told, yeah
Tsukki had been going back and forth on asking Kuroo for his help to make Yamaguchi jealous, but not even in a romantic way, more like he wanted Yamaguchi to pay more attention to him and have it be the way it used to.
Tsukki’s efforts to try to get Yamaguchi to spend more time with him like he used to had come to no effect until he had the bright idea to try to get Kuroo to help him.
Kuroo being intuitive as if he already knew, as Tsukki approached him, what he wanted to ask. Or something along the lines of that.
Even before Tsukki was able to speak, Kuroo interrupted him, “Sure, why not.” Tsukki rolled his eyes, “You didn’t even hear what I had to say!” Kuroo couldn’t help but bend over and laugh.
Tsukki, already tired of his antics tried to speak once again, “Listen, date me.” He grabbed Kuroo’s arm to which Kuroo stopped laughing all of a sudden. “What, got nothing to say?” Now it was Tsukki’s turn to smirk at him.
“You know why though, don’t you? I’m sure everyone but Yamaguchi is aware.” Tsukki let go of Kuroo’s arm and all Kuroo could do was nod. He was sure he would be able to help Tsukki, and being the good friend he is agreed to this plan.
“First to catch feelings loses.” Kuroo states. Tsukki could only scoff, ready to get this conversation over with. “This isn’t a game! But fine, if you want to have fun with it.”
Tsukki did not know what he was getting himself into.
You ordered fun, I served you threats
Ever since Kuroo proposed the idea of not catching feelings, Tsukki could not stop thinking about what type of idiot Kuroo thinks he is.
Every time Kuroo insisted they had fun during their ‘dates’ Tsukki would only slump his shoulders and threaten to just drop the whole thing since it wasn’t working on Yamaguchi anyway.
Later in the day, when they weren’t together, Tsukki would regret his actions because he was the one who approached Kuroo first. It isn’t like Kuroo disagreed anyway, it must have been a drag for him too.
The longer they kept this up, the more Tsukki was slowly beginning to have fun. He was confused because he didn’t think hanging out with Kuroo like this could make him feel anything at all. He wasn’t quite sure what it meant anyway, so he pushed the beating of his heart aside.
Now, when Kuroo suggested they go out on a ‘date’, Tsukki would agree trying to hide how happy it actually made him.
Tsukki came to the realization that he had lied when they first placed the rules.
I like you, I like you, I like you
Sorry, I never meant to
But who’re we kidding, it wasn’t like I had a say
One look at you and I won’t have it any other way
When Tsukki realized he had caught feelings, and the whole thing wasn’t working on Yamaguchi, Tsukki ended it.
Kuroo might have had an idea as to why but he decided not to pry any further and just let it go. Letting Tsukki figure it out on his own, he had to give Tsukki that at least.
Every time Tsukki passes by places where they went on dates, he found himself stopping to stare at the spots they spent time together in.
Under the cherry blossom tree on the bench – they had bought ice cream that day and Kuroo decided to stop for a bit to enjoy them. Tsukki remembers the flavours they bought, Tsukki had strawberry and Kuroo chocolate.
“Hey strawberry!” After that ‘date’ Kuroo would call out to Tsukki whenever they met up. Making strawberry Kuroo’s new nickname for him.
This memory made Tsukki pout, he missed Kuroo but he would never have the guts to tell him that to his face.
Going into it and looking back, Tsukki never in a million years would have thought that Kuroo would be the one to make his heart speed up the way it currently is.
Now, whenever Kuroo would look to Tsukki from the other side of the street, he would smile. Tsukki pretended like it didn’t affect him and put a fake scowl on his face. Kuroo chuckled knowingly, as if he knew exactly how Tsukki felt.
How could he? Tsukki thought, I never hinted at it anyway.
I know that I signed up for this casually
Tsukki’s feelings were all over the place. It was his fault he put himself in this situation but he never once thought that he would end up liking Kuroo.
He went into it blindly, ignoring the consequences that would end up making him go a little crazy at the thought alone.
Kuroo noticed the slight changes to Tsukki’s actions. Despite not hanging out and ‘dating’ each other, they were still in the same friend group and avoiding each other was proven difficult.
Their friends didn’t think much of when they broke up, they thought it wasn’t serious at all.
After they supposedly broke up, Yamaguchi was there to comfort Tsukki. Obviously thinking it was real, he wanted to be there for Tsukki, they’ve been friends for years.
This is what Tsukki wanted, then why did it feel wrong? He didn’t want Yamaguchi to spend time with him like that anymore, he wanted Kuroo.
I’m in trouble, Tsukki thought with his head in his hands.
You got that mystery
Kuroo was hard to read. Tsukki never truly knew how he was feeling at the moment.
Which is why he keeps going back and forth on whether Kuroo liked him back, even just a little.
Tsukki was frustrated at this point, which was a rarity. He never really showed his emotions on his sleeve like that.
Even when Tsukki first met Kuroo, he was cool and composed. He didn’t show much emotion which intrigued Tsukki if he was being honest. Kuroo reminded him of himself in a way.
Tsukki remembered one of the conversations they had at the bowling alley, during one of their dates. At this point, he was already falling for Kuroo which was scary for him.
“What do you want out of this anyway?” Kuroo had suddenly asked. “Yamaguchi...” Tsukki replied.
Tsukki saw Kuroo’s shoulders sag for the rest of the date. He didn’t know why, either that, or he was just too blind to see it.
Kuroo was a mystery he wanted to solve.
For me to fall for your kind
But, oh God, I wish you were mine
After the bowling date, they spent less and less time together. Which is why Tsukki had to end it before his feelings spiraled and took over him completely.
It was too late for that.
Tsukki reminded himself every day how much fun he had with Kuroo, even though they spent not too long together, they were friends first and this is what Tsukki longed for.
Even though he ended up liking Kuroo, he wished their friendship stayed the same at the least. But, it was his fault and he was making it awkward on his own.
When they made up as friends again, Kuroo took Tsukki back almost immediately.
Tsukki wasn’t sure what he expected from Kuroo anyway. He had done a lot of thinking and not once did he think of this scenario.
Shit, he thought, I still want him to be mine.
The thoughts that were running through Tsukki’s head really frustrated him.
Kuroo noticed and immediately stopped his conversation with another group of boys, “Hey, are you okay?” Tsukki wanted to cry, so he pushed Kuroo’s arms aside and made a run for it.
He didn’t know what he was feeling, he didn’t think fake dating Kuroo would end up practically breaking his heart. Who was he? He never felt like this before.
Kuroo thought enough was enough and followed him that day. Only to find him crouched down leaning on the side of the school building.
Kuroo leaned down to guide Tsukki’s head to look up at him. “Hey, come here.” Kuroo lifted Tsukki off the ground so they were face to face.
Kuroo smiled at him, “Why are you crying?” He wiped Tsukki’s tears. Tsukki could only shake his head, no.
Kuroo knew Tsukki wasn’t going to use his words so with his hand on the back of Tsukki’s head, he pulled him into his arms. Tsukki couldn’t help but wrap his arms around Kuroo’s torso.
Would it be a stress if I asked you to try again?
Almost immediately after Kuroo consoled Tsukki, they decided to sit back down on the floor next to each other.
It was quiet for a couple of minutes before Tsukki spoke up, “Why did you follow me?”
Kuroo honestly wanted to laugh. He found it endearing how clueless Tsukki was.
“You don’t know?” Tsukki was confused, although he vowed to himself never to tell Kuroo how he felt about him, at that moment he wanted to shout it for everyone to hear.
“Let’s do it again. For real this time.” For as smart as Tsukki looked, he was really clueless when it came to feelings.
Tsukki’s heart was soaring through the roof now, but he still didn’t say anything.
“Come on Tsukki, I know you’re not that stupid. I know you know what I’m saying.” Kuroo now had his body fully turned towards Tsukki this time.
Kuroo was leaning closer and closer to Tsukki, Tsukki felt so small next to Kuroo like this.
Tsukki closed his eyes just as he felt Kuroo inches away from him. “Open your eyes,” Tsukki slowly let his eyes flutter open. “Can I?” Kuroo asked and Tsukki knew for sure this time what he was implying. He could only nod.
Kuroo smiled and leaned in for the kiss. It was sweet, Tsukki thought, much different than when they kissed when they were ‘dating’.
As Kuroo pulled away, Tsukki couldn’t help but wrap his arm around Kuroo’s neck to bring him in for another kiss. This made Kuroo laugh into him.
“You lost.” Kuroo stated, making the other boy chuckle as he held him in his arms.