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Pink Hydrangeas

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A thousand words could describe the grace with which Kim Namjoon walks down the aisle but there’s not quite enough to really express what Jimin feels like when he trails his eyes over at his best friend, Taehyung, waiting for Namjoon at the altar with tears in his eyes and a large love-filled smile stretching across his face.

 

It's almost like little hearts are bursting out of Taehyung’s eyes at the sight of his soon to be husband, tears welling up the closer Namjoon gets to him with his father in tow. Low classical music accompanies them both before it settles into an even lower lull, and then stops completely. Taehyung’s uncle — the minister — coughs into his hand, greeting the pair with a delighted smile before he opens his mouth and starts the ceremony, his voice loud and strong in such a small, intimate space.

 

Jimin spaces out in the middle of it, as much as he loves the couple he’s also always had trouble with concentrating for long periods of time, and besides, he’s heard these speeches a thousand times before. Knew them all like the back of his hand. He’s sure if Taehyung was sitting here beside him instead of staying at the altar, he would understand — especially when Jeon Jungkook is sitting in front of him, grandma Kim clutching his left bicep and his cousin Gayoung sitting to the right.

 

Saying Jimin had lost his breath upon seeing him for the first time would be an understatement — it was a shock even though he’d known Jungkook would attend ever since Namjoon bought the ring. The blond guesses knowing about it was far different from actually experiencing it in real life. Jungkook had smiled at him, warmly — goosebumps still present on Jimin’s skin once the younger’s eyes trailed over him curiously. It’s been such a long time and for Jimin, it’s like nothing has changed; however, as soon as his brain dives into nostalgia, the bitter thoughts come crashing into him, forcing his ribs open and stabbing his heart continuously.

 

Jimin looks up towards the ceiling, ivory archways melt into each other and surround the entirety of the large room, thin gauzy fabric and flowers hang on them from high up, trailing down all around the walls and the ground. It’s a beautiful mix of pink hydrangeas, and some other kind of thin, ivory colored flowers that Jimin can’t put his finger on. The only reason as to why he knows they’re hydrangeas at all is the exact reason behind his anxiety brewing at the pit of his stomach. He refuses to really acknowledge it.

 

Jungkook turns suddenly, whispers something to Hoseok and once again, Jimin does his best to avoid his big doe eyes. He stares up at the hydrangeas again, doing his best to pay attention to the ceremony all at the same time, and telling himself Jungkook isn’t staring at him, it’s just his mind playing tricks on him. 

 

Soon enough, the vows start and Jungkook turns; he turns as if the look wasn’t there eating Jimin alive in the first place.




 

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───




 

“I don’t understand what you want from me!” Jungkook’s eyes are vicious, dripping with annoyance. It drives Jimin insane and he has half a mind to just drop everything and leave, but he’s much too petty to give this up — and to let Jungkook have the last word as well.

 

Rolling his eyes, Jimin picks up a couch cushion and brings it towards his chest, cuddling it to feel some comfort. “I’ve explained it a thousand times, yet you still don’t understand.”

 

“No, that’s not the case at all.” Jungkook argues, a loud sigh leaving his pink lips and Jimin would be covering them in kisses if he didn’t want to rip the other apart at the moment. “What else do you want me to do?! Have I not proven how much I love you?! This isn’t a game Jimin, it’s not a test to keep failing or passing it. Just tell me what you want me to do!”

 

The fight has been going on for hours now, starting from something small, so minuscule that Jimin can’t even remember what caused it anymore. It’s been so long that Jimin has gone from being angry to regretful, to being angry again. It was exhausting, felt like neither of them were moving forward or making any kind of a real point to argue their case. Jungkook never made Jimin feel like his feelings were unwanted or unwarranted — always made sure he knew that he was valid in whatever he felt but everyone had a limit. 

 

It was unfortunate how this is the time Jungkook’s limit had been breached, but Jimin found it hard to care.

 

Everything just kept on piling up and snowballing before his very own eyes, and the older couldn't do anything about it to at least try and control his emotions. He felt ignored, felt like Jungkook was forgetting about him especially with how little time they spent together lately. Jimin never asked for much — not for any material things at least, matter of fact, he hated when Jungkook spent money on him; even if he had lots of it. So much so that he probably wouldn’t be able to do anything to the amount throughout his entire life. Even so, Jimin always much preferred quality time, spent cuddling and loving each other, rather than anything else. Being the analytical person Jungkook was, this fact was somehow too hard to understand.

 

“I don’t want you to prove anything.” Jimin retaliates, heated. “Your way of proving is by throwing gifts at me, and all I want from you is to actually love me!” The words leave Jimin’s mouth carelessly, not really thinking about the acidic taste they leave behind. “I’m not a toy you can throw money at to keep happy.” His mind is covered in red, heart beating erratically drunk off the adrenaline, and even though he realizes his wrongs right away, it’s too late.

 

It’s too late because not only has Jungkook heard him loud and clear, he’s also shaking his head in disappointment and laughing cynically until he stops soon after. It’s silent, too silent other than the heavy breathing that unnerves Jimin. He doesn’t know what to do next, so instead of apologizing, which, in retrospect he probably should’ve done, he crosses his arms across his chest and looks away.

 

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean, huh?!” Jungkook replies, left eye twitching in annoyance which Jimin has never seen before. This is a whole new level of anger. “I don’t—“

 

“Oh you know exactly what it means.” Jimin, shut up, shut up, shut up. “I keep asking you to find even a little bit of time for me, but no, I’m always a second option to you. It’s like I’m some decoration you can show off when you need me.”

 

Jungkook looks like someone punched him in the gut, his eyes are no longer as angry as mere seconds ago and his fists unclench in defeat. Regretting his words, Jimin is about to stand up, apologies at the ready to tumble out of his pouty lips and tears already spilling over his chubby cheeks. “Jungkook— I’m sor—“

 

Jungkook raises a hand to his face, trying to wipe at his own tears sneakily, but the pained breath he takes next makes it so much more obvious. He comes closer and for a second, Jimin thinks it’ll all be okay, that Jungkook knows it’s just the overthinking, the emotional talking. Jimin knows his boyfriend loves him, always doting and never letting Jimin want for anything. The blond has always been more emotional than Jungkook, and sometimes it gets hard, it’s hard to fight off his demons all the time — they eat away at him and make him think stupid things that aren’t true most of the time. This is not an excuse though, and judging from the other’s face, he can tell it’s all gone too far this time.

 

“I think I’ve heard enough. Aren’t you tired of this?! It’s constant.” Jungkook whispers, sitting down on the couch but it’s too far away from Jimin. The latter thinks about moving closer but his boyfriend’s words freeze him in place. “I don’t think we’re compatible.”

 

A cold takes over Jimin's frame, freezing him in place, blood turning into a million little icicles. “What?”

 

“You need someone who will take care of you, clearly I can’t do that well. I don’t want to leave you feeling like I’m using you when that is not my intention. I expect people to know I care for them if I’m around them— I just am like that.”

 

He can’t breathe, it’s so hard, harder than anything he’s ever had to do before. This can’t be the end. Jimin refuses to let it. “Jungkook—“

 

“Hey, hey,” Jungkook’s voice is soothing and no longer ticked off, it worries Jimin. What the fuck is going on?! “Jimin breathe,”

 

“I can’t— I don’t— Jungkookie…” Jimin looks up at him with pleading eyes, big, round and sparkling. Any other time, Jungkook would succumb to any of Jimin’s wishes no matter how ridiculous it sounded, but this time is different. This time, his jaw is set and flexed, coaxing Jimin out of his panic but not like before.

 

“You know I’m right,” Jungkook’s words are laced with honey, inviting and calm, then why is it that Jimin still can’t breathe? “I’m not the type— You need someone who will take care of you how you deserve, and I, someone who will accept me how I am. We fight about this every couple days... You understand right?”

 

“I will— am. I do accept you. I am—“

 

Jungkook smiles sadly, his brows deep set with a determined look in his eyes. There’s no changing his mind when he gets like this and Jimin is scared. “Stop, stop. Breathe, c’mon. Breathe with me.” Jungkook shushes him before Jimin can get his racing mind to supply him with another poisoned thought. He’s quiet mainly because he doesn’t really know what to say, he feels like if he opens his mouth again he will just end up embarrassing himself even more. He still has time.

 

“But—“

 

“We can talk about this later, please c’mon breathe with me, okay? In.” Deep breath in. “Out.” Even now, Jungkook is putting Jimin first and he feels so stupid, so fucking stupid for saying anything at all. But he doesn’t want to put the blame all on himself — even in this delirious state Jimin realizes he had reasons valid enough to say anything at all and start this fight in the first place.

 

Jungkook winds his arms around him, his back to Jungkook’s front and deep breaths making their way into his lungs. It’s difficult at first, Jimin thinks this is what drowning would feel like when tears slip over his face continuously and Jungkook’s soft fingers wipe them away. 

 

He nuzzles back, not daring to utter a single word and just bask in the attention before everything collapses around him. Looking over at the dinner table to the far right, his eyes set on a bouquet of long-dead pink hydrangeas Jungkook had gifted him last week. They’ve dulled in color and hang pathetically, most of the petals have fallen off and are instead laying on the table beneath the vase. 

 

With a flickering thought, Jimin wonders if the same will become of him when Jungkook leaves.



 

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───



 

“I feel like I’m gonna pee,”

 

“Please do that outside of my lap,” Jimin giggles in Taehyung’s ear, but contrary to his words clutches his waist tighter towards his chest and nuzzles his neck warmly. People around him keep buzzing and talking with abandon, nobody seems to be paying any attention to them, at least for now.

 

It’s been a couple hours after the ceremony and Jimin has long been reminded of why he hates weddings. If it hadn’t been for Taehyung and Namjoon, you couldn’t pay him to be here. However, at seeing the utter joy exuding from the happy couple in powerful waves, he figures he can take it for one night — he’s quite happy to do so, actually.

 

“You’re no fun…”

 

“If not wanting to get peed on makes me boring, I’ll accept my fate,” Jimin laughs again, not being able to hold his giggles in, Taehyung joins in quickly after.

 

Jimin stays with Taehyung for a while, a couple of their friends come closer so all of them end up sitting together to chat before they have to make toasts and cut the cake. Jimin is nervous, he gets even more nervous when he realizes, somehow Jungkook has made it into the mix, sitting right beside Yoongi and having a quiet conversation; Jimin’s curious, wondering what they’re talking about, if there’s anything new in Jungkook’s life but this silent agreement of them orbiting around each other at the wedding without really saying anything is a good place to stay and observe from afar.

 

Soon enough, Namjoon comes to collect his husband and take him away, Taehyung’s brother — his best man — getting ready to deliver a speech that at the end has half the venue in tears, Jimin included. A few more people speak, the blond knows his turn is coming up and his forehead breaks out in a cold sweat. Public speaking has never been his strong suit, it always makes him unnecessarily nervous and agitated — even though there’s no reason for him to worry, his anxiety still plagues his mind and forces him to think about people finding him embarrassing or making fun of him behind his back.

 

As Jimin stands up, his eyes dart to Jungkook instinctively, who he finds is sitting right beside him now. Opening his mouth Jimin can’t seem to get a word out, but suddenly, Jungkook grabs his hand underneath the table; warmth spreads through Jimin’s skin as easily as dried up firewood catches on fire, it embeds itself into his bones and makes him forget about his worries partly. Partly, but still enough to let him concentrate on what he has to say. Jungkook nods at him, twice, encouraging him silently. 

 

Jimin doesn’t have enough time — or sanity — to think about how to interpret this, so he simply nods back, smiles and starts to speak.

 

“When Namjoon first introduced Taehyung to us…” He can almost imagine it as if it happened yesterday, it was a hot July night and Jimin was sweating like never before. Him and Hoseok had been waiting at this tiny little neighborhood restaurant for twenty minutes already, and whenever Jimin remembers how annoyed Hoseok had been, it never fails to make him giggle — he was ready to leave too, claiming he didn’t even want to meet Taehyung anymore, but then Jimin remembers how close the two are now and feels proud of himself for not letting him leave.

 

“What the fuck is taking so long, I’m hungry.” Hoseok murmurs, his voice drawled out and tired. His dialect slips through his annoyance and he amplifies it to get his point across.

 

Giggling, Jimin looks over the menu again, their legs rest against each other underneath the restaurant table. He’s tired too, but he knows if he even lets a peep slip, Hoseok’s need to leave and rest will double in size in solidarity, so he remains quiet about the subject. “Well, we did come here ten minutes early.”

 

“So?!” he sounds so scandalized Jimin can’t help himself, doubling over and laughing to his heart’s content. “This Taehyung person better be cute, or I’ll leave. You know what— I’m leaving.” Hoseok stands up but Jimin grabs his wrist quickly, pulling him back to his seat.

 

“That’s mean!” Jimin argues, slapping him on the shoulder and mock-frowning at him. “And, he’s very cute. I’ve seen him, you’re going to like him a lot.”

 

Hoseok’s brow rises up to his hairline. “Why do you get special treatment, huh?!”

 

“Because I’m Joonie’s favorite.”

 

Rolling his eyes, Hoseok turns in his chair, then rests his jaw on his palm and looks over Jimin again, unimpressed. “Are you sure it has nothing to do with Jeon—“

 

“They’re here!” Jimin calls out loudly, Hoseok shuts his mouth immediately. “Oh my god, what’s he doing here—“

 

Waving the trio over, Hoseok smiles and speaks through his teeth. “I feel like a fifth wheel now,”

 

“Why?!”

 

“He’s already eating you with his eyes, Jimin.”

 

“Is not!—“ Jimin shuts him up with his scathing stare and sharp nails to the back of his neck, “Hello!”

 

They exchange greetings quickly, everyone settles into their seats and starts up a conversation which relieves Jimin a lot. He’s pretty awkward and often has trouble coming up with things to say or have the conversation going, so to see it flowing so well among the five now puts him at ease. He’s enjoying this more than he ever thought he would.

 

Taehyung is so nice, very attentive and funny, it’s not hard to be around him or find interesting things to talk about but Jimin already knew that — there was no way for him to not to with how long Namjoon has had a crush on him; it was only natural for Jimin to fall madly in love with Taehyung’s best friend too after spending so much time ogling at him every time he is in Jungkook’s close vicinity. He’s just so handsome, so big and pretty, Jimin often can’t take his eyes off of him when he’s studying or having a picnic with his friends in the campus park. They’ve spoken once before, but Jimin isn’t sure if Jungkook remembers him at all and he hopes he doesn’t — it was humiliating.

 

“It’s really nice to see you again, Minnie.” Jungkook smiles.

 

Jimin feels like he’s about to evaporate. He’s forgotten he introduced himself to Jungkook with the nickname — oh god, he hopes there’s nothing more embarrassing lurking in Jungkook’s memory ready to make itself known and humiliate him on the spot, but nothing of this sort comes. Jungkook is pleasant, paying attention to everything Jimin says and responding with his own questions to liven up the conversation, it’s almost like Jimin and Jungkook are somewhere completely away from the three friends sitting beside them and having their own conversion — they’ve long given up on the pair or trying to include them in the conversation.

 

Throughout the night though, he can’t seem to avoid Jungkook’s eyes, they seem to follow him every time he moves or speaks. Jimin can’t say he doesn’t appreciate it since it does feel nice to know someone is always listening to what you have to say and you won’t be ignored. Hoseok pinching his side every time he notices doesn’t help either.

 

It’s a strange feeling for someone like him, someone so awkward and anxious but Jungkook doesn’t make him uncomfortable, instead, Jimin feels more confident in his advances and doesn’t shy away from staring right back at him; if he slips a few licks to his lips or coy smiles in between no one but the pair has to know. 

 

That’s how Jimin ends up slammed against the bathroom wall in the restaurant, Jungkook kissing down the column of his throat, hot tongue laving at his skin and teeth leaving marks in their wake. Jimin moans loudly, not really caring about who hears him, only when Jungkook has three long fingers inside him does he remember it’s probably been too long for a short bathroom break but when he looks back at Jungkook’s lust-filled eyes staring at him with a cocky smirk, he dives back into him with no regrets.

 

Jimin rides Jungkook’s fingers, arches his back and moves his hips expertly, chasing that peak he’s sure no one other than Jungkook can give him. Leaking in his underwear, Jimin tries to get his hands on Jungkook too but the younger shushes him and sits down on top of the toilet, putting one of his thighs in between Jimin’s and letting his hard cock grind into the soft flesh.

 

“You’re so fucking hot,” Jungkook whispers against his jaw, lips dragging along Jimin’s heated skin and leaving a wet trail behind. The blond is positively drooling at each move Jungkook makes, spit slipping past his thick lips but the other is there to lick it up quickly. The action so hot it goes straight to Jimin’s cock and he mewls deep in his throat, whining at Jungkook to do something else, and he does, hand massaging at his head while the other thrusts in and out slowly, softly rubbing Jimin’s prostate every time.

 

Jimin is getting more and more needy as the seconds pass, he needs more, just a little so he asks for it, and Jungkook is ready to give him anything he desires. Jimin guides Jungkook’s second hand away from his cock and to his mouth instead, sucking on the thick digits like a hungry, needy slut and it makes him feel so much more sexy; he knows he is too, if Jungkook’s lustful moans are any indication. “Please— Please make me come, please.” Jimin begs, not even caring about sounding so desperate anymore. He needs to finish now or he feels like he’ll explode.

 

“Hold on, wait a second—“ Jungkook whispers back, manhandling Jimin across his lap again so his cock is directly under Jimin’s hole now, sliding under it and Jungkook’s fingers every time Jimin angles his hips and moves them to the rhythm of his heartbeat. “C’mon— c’mon baby.”

 

Filthy words tumble out of Jimin and he can’t even recognize himself with how forward and needy he sounds, his own words turn him on and make his hole flutter around Jungkook’s fingers, begging to be filled by his thick cock. “I wish you could come inside me—“ Jimin whines, feeling proud of himself for what kind of a reaction he gets out of the other. A deep growl reverberates inside the stall they’re in, Jungkook’s chest rumbling and somehow making Jimin even harder.

 

“Fuck— don’t say that.” Jungkook moans and thrusts up between Jimin’s cheeks, fingers still digging into his puffy hole. “Fuckfuckfuck”

 

Jimin throws his head back, a long, deep moan slips from his lips as he digs his nails into Jungkook’s shoulders, leaving little red crescent marks into his tanned skin. It makes Jimin feel insatiable, leaning forward and attaching his lips to the other’s neck to mark and claim Jungkook as his own.

 

While the pair get lost in each other, fingers digging into flesh and tongue leaving trails of saliva behind, Jimin’s phone buzzes a few times, but of course Jimin doesn’t pay it any attention, instead he unbuttons Jungkook’s jeans and reaches his hand inside to clutch at the other’s weeping hard cock.

 

From: Joonie 💘 — u realize we know y’all are fucking in there right

 

From: hobihobihobi 💗 — SHAME!!!!!!!!!

 

From: hobihobihobi 💗 — i am NEVER going anywhere with a bathroom with you two again

 

From: Joonie 💘 — OH MY GOD JIMIN SOMEONE TRIED TO COME IN YOU GUYS LOCKED THE DOOR???????? might as well have hung a sock on the handle😭

 

From: Joonie 💘 — i mean at least ur having fun 😘 we’re leaving by the way so good luck walking back out everyone clocked yall🥳😝

 

 



─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

 



“Who hosts a reception on the twentieth floor, right?!” Jungkook basically spawns from thin air. Jimin’s heart races, he doesn’t want to think about the reason behind it. It’s definitely because he wasn’t expecting anyone to come up to him. Definitely.

 

“I agree, it’s strange. Never thought we’d find anything higher than your horse.” Jimin replies, voice dripping with sarcasm and eyes rolling to the back of his skull.

 

Fully expecting Jungkook to balk at the words, Jimin’s ears ring with excitement and fingertips go numb — it’s so close, so close to satisfaction Jungkook’s embarrassed expression will bring him that he almost doesn’t notice how the latter’s face breaks into an amused smile, then transforms into a hearty laugh. Jungkook giggles over and over throwing his head back humorously.

 

With a bated breath, Jimin looks away and tries to hide the way his cheeks bloom with pink. Anxiety swims through him but he’s slowly reminding himself that it’s just Jungkook — Jungkook who knows him, or used to know him.

 

“What got you in such a sour mood, huh?” Jungkook asks quietly, adjusting his cufflink with expert technique. You Jimin wants to say but doesn’t, it’s unfair. It’s not Jungkook’s fault that Jimin can’t stop thinking about him and their life together. He’s the loser who can’t let go of the past — not Jungkook — he doesn’t need to involve anyone else in his misery.

 

“Nothing.” He replies instead, avoiding the other’s questioning eyes and instead crossing his arms over his chest once his eyes pick up the slow dance music. Great. “I’m just really tired and I have work tomorrow.” There’s absolutely no reason for Jimin to be sharing this information but Jungkook is so easy to talk to, he finds himself spilling anyway.

 

Jungkook hums, pursing his lips and so clearly not believing, however he doesn’t press further. Instead, he comes around Jimin and stands right in front of him. “May I have this dance, then? You can keep taking it out on me.” He asks cheekily, and Jimin’s blood boils in anger at his own self for how much he wants to say yes. The blond doesn’t answer, he does, however unlink his arms and holds them at his sides now. A stupid move. Stupid because Jungkook takes it as affirmation and grabs Jimin’s pretty, manicured palm in his.

 

He takes Jimin’s hand and his breath too.

 

Jimin hasn’t felt Jungkook’s hand in his for around two years now — who is he kidding, it’s been precisely two years one month and a week. His heart blooms with familiar warmth as soon as Jungkook’s long elegant fingers wrap around his own, and stupidly, the first thing the blond notes is how his hands aren’t so rough anymore. Jimin doesn’t know why that thought soothes something inside him, maybe it’s because Jungkook must still use the hand cream he kept suggesting for months while they were dating.

 

Having that one thing — even if it’s something so small — eases his heart a little, however it’s not enough to make hope bloom. That train has long passed them both.

 

Chuckling, Jungkook’s eyes crinkle in fondness, his hand tightening around Jimin as he tugs the latter towards the dancefloor, even though Jimin’s feet seem to weigh heavier than lead, his shyness wrapping a cloak of red around his cheeks. It’s never been something Jungkook backed down from though, so the next time Jimin’s brain becomes aware of its surroundings — the next time he swims above the ocean that is Jungkook — the latter’s hands are already wrapped around his waist tightly, face not losing its cocky charm even when Jimin steps on him a few times.

 

Jimin fiddles with a stray thread on Jungkook’s suit jacket for a fleeting moment. He foolishly trusts it to distract him enough so he won’t completely lose his sanity; but with how Jungkook is moving against him, twirling and then catching Jimin right back into his arms, it’s too much of a reminder of many of their late nights. Jimin’s heart is cracking in two all over again — he’s lost count of how many times its done so today alone. 

 

Very ironic how his best friend’s wedding — the happiest day of his life, is the worst for Jimin.

 

“What’s gotten into you, huh? Since when does Park Jimin refuse a good ol’ waltz?” Jungkook laughs, his brows are arched in that pure childish curiosity of his, disbelieving eyes betraying his real question. Fingers dig into Jimin’s arched back, almost fitting like peas in a pod, like they belong there and that’s about all Jimin can take. “Jimin?” The taller asks, backing away to give him some room to breathe. Jungkook has always been so good at reading him — too good sometimes.

 

Jungkook is standing there like he had on the day of their breakup, shoulders hunched and a deep scowl embedded into his handsome face. He’s less angry now though, little victories , Jimin thinks. 

 

All night he’s been trying to avoid thinking about Jungkook, avoid dissecting every little thing that might have gone wrong in their relationship — trying to bargain with himself or convince that it’s not worth it to try again, it’s been two years after all. Plus, the last he heard Jungkook was dating somebody else, a particularly bitter pill Jimin forced himself to swallow. Jimin finally comes to a conclusion, something he’s been trying to avoid ever since he found out Jungkook would attend the wedding too. It’s too late for us now.

 

“Jimin,” Jungkook starts again, his voice gentle, so soft and inviting that Jimin almost looks up at him and gets lost in him all over again. “Jimin, what’s wrong?” It really doesn’t help how the other sounds like he’s ready to dive into anything Jimin seems to have trouble with, ready to fix anything until his hands bleed. And yet, Jimin wonders where did it all go wrong? Of course he knows, so does Jungkook, but the pain of knowing exactly why is too much for both of them.

 

It’s too much and not enough at the same time, but Jimin doesn’t want to stick long enough to find out.

 

“I gotta go, sorry.”

 

Jimin leaves a confused Jungkook behind him — still hearing him call out his name in confusion as he walks past everyone else briskly, getting curious looks while he’s at it. The only thing Jimin hopes for is for Taehyung to not see him, that would be a disaster knowing how worried the latter can get over him.

 

Jimin ends up on the roof without having any clue as to how he got there at all, noticing the door is still left ajar calms him though. It would be a disaster to get locked out on the roof at your best friend’s wedding with your ex looking for you. He finds a lone bench near the edge of the building, the cement ledges are high enough so he’s not scared of falling off and sits down — figures it’s been put there so the staff have somewhere to sit for smoke breaks.

 

Head pounding, his forehead breaks out into a sweat and Jimin groans as he wipes it away, letting the cold breeze dry up what his fingers couldn’t reach.

 

“You’re fast for someone who doesn’t work out, huh?” Jungkook makes him jump yet again, laughing at the annoyed face Jimin makes. “Or do you?”

 

“What part of “I have to go” did you not understand?” Jimin tries to not sound annoyed but fails, Jungkook pays no mind to it, anyway.

 

“Can’t imagine being on the roof at—“ He looks at his watch, it’s so big and looks expensive, the attraction grows even more. “—Ten fifteen is fun, plus, alone. Wouldn't you like some company?”

 

Jimin doesn’t respond to him, mainly because his eyes fill up with tears again and he’s scared if he tries to speak his voice will break along with his expression. Jungkook is still so playful — even more so, even more confident — and it tugs at his heart. Jimin knows it should make him happy that Jungkook is trying his best to cheer him up without explicitly saying anything. All it does is bring back unwanted memories that keep breaking his heart. The fact that it’s all his fault makes everything worse.

 

“What are you doing here?”

 

“I was invited.” Jungkook tries to outsmart him and sits beside him, brow jumping up for a second before he smiles at him and goes quiet. Both of them know what Jimin actually meant but the latter is way too tired to keep prying. If Jungkook doesn’t want to answer, he doesn’t have to. “I wanted to see how you feel,” he answers finally.

 

“I’m— I’m fine.” Jimin supplies pathetically, “I just needed to get a breather it’s hot in there so…”

 

Sighing, Jungkook gets his phone out and texts someone quickly. At the sight, Jimin can’t help but think whom it may be — he doesn’t ask though. It’s none of his business. “Is that why you ran away crying?” Jungkook isn’t chastising him, his callout doesn’t feel embarrassing or as if Jungkook is trying to get the upper hand to prove him wrong. It feels caring, makes everything worse for Jimin. He can’t be feeling like this, it’s too late and it’s not his place. Hadn’t been for years. “I’m not a stranger you know, is something bothering you?”

 

“I just— You know how I get.” Jimin tries to laugh it off and wipes a couple stray tears away again, tries to pretend like it’s not a big deal but Jungkook knows better so he slides closer to him and takes one of Jimin’s hands in his, rubbing the back of it softly. Jimin doesn’t know how to react or what to say so he doesn’t do anything, instinctively leans his head on Jungkook’s shoulder and breathes deeply. “I guess, seeing you again after so long brought back memories. I didn't expect it to.”

 

Jungkook wants to say something, the blond can tell, but he doesn’t make a sound for a while. Then, “It’s been two years, Jimin.” Jingkook’s voice isn’t mean, it’s just stating a fact that both of them know this still doesn’t aid Jimin in any way.

 

The words hit him like an oncoming truck, they break him up and put them back together only to knock him down again. It’s like it’s been too long, like Jimin isn’t allowed to be sad about it since it’s been a while — it makes him angry so he slips away but Jungkook is quick to get him in his arms again. “Just didn’t think it meant so much to you, but—“

 

Disbelief is clear on the blond’s face, he tries to move away again angrily, but Jungkook doesn’t let him. “How can you say that?!”

 

Shaking his head, Jungkook looks softer, with his guard down and Jimin doesn’t know why that makes him feel at ease. He can’t hope for anything, it’s too unrealistic. The younger shrugs but doesn’t comment further, somehow Jimin feels like he deserves this. He deserves to be questioned and have his loyalty or love doubted. That’s what he did to Jungkook after all.

 

It’s quiet for so long that Jimin doesn’t even know how much time has passed since he came up here, wonders if his friends are looking for him at the party but his phone has been sitting unmoving in his breast pocket so they’re probably too caught up in having fun to ask about his whereabouts. It feels awkward, gone is the time when Jimin and Jungkook could talk about anything all day long and never tire, add another thing to make Jimin sad to the list.

 

“So, how have you been?” Jungkook finally breaks the silence, his voice is kind of scratchy and Jimin can’t get enough of it. Wants to hear him speak all the time, always. Jungkook could tell him to do anything and Jimin would do it no questions asked.

 

Never being a fan of small talk, the blond almost forces himself to answer. “I’ve been okay. I helped a lot with the wedding so kind of distracted— I guess. You?”

 

Somehow, there’s something in the way Jungkook looks at him that Jimin realizes something is coming, something big .

 

Putting all the previously known facts together, Jimin deduces it’s probably news about him getting married and he’s not sure if he can handle it at the moment. He doesn’t even know how to fake excitement — let alone fake excitement for your ex (whom you’re still in love with) telling you he’s marrying someone else. Jimin can already feel his heart lurch in an uncomfortable way, his lungs barely keeping up with how quickly he inhales and exhales just to keep himself afloat. Falling off a twenty story building would hurt less than this and Jimin is about to take the next step.

 

“Miserable. I miss you like crazy. I don’t know what to do about it.”

 

Well. Nevermind then.

 

“What do you—“

 

Jungkook closes his eyes with his cheeks red and lips pouty, Jimin is about to kiss him. 

 

He hasn’t seen Jungkook look so nervous and cute in years — even when they were together it wasn’t every day that Jeon Jungkook got embarrassed or bashful about something and Jimin lived for the days when he’d actually allow himself to be the cutie Jimin knew he was. “I miss you. I have for so long it’s driving me crazy, Jimin… I guess I used this wedding as an excuse too because I really didn’t want to come and see you with someone else.” Jungkook sounds so heartbroken it’s actually making Jimin’s heart twist in all the different directions, begging for him to stop talking because the pain is getting unbearable. “I wanted to be here for them, obviously, but I— I guess I’m here for you too, if you’ll have me.”

 

“You— Uh, what?” Jimin starts but before he can finish, he quickly adds. “Me too, Jungkook— me t—“

 

Jimin can’t even finish the sentence because suddenly, he has an armful of Jungkook with his lips attached to soft, thinner ones. The younger licks into his mouth, hot breath fanning across his mouth and chin when Jungkook leans away so both of them can take a breath. It doesn’t really last long though because in the next moment, Jimin is surging forward, linking their lips once more.

 

Grunting deeply, Jungkook trails his hands over Jimin’s cheeks softly, it’s a ghost of a touch but Jimin’s skin is still covered in goosebumps he can’t explain. Pleasure shoots through his abdomen and burrows inside his tummy, it’s something he hasn’t felt in so long — never wanting anyone else other than Jungkook. The latter’s hands trail over Jimin’s back, squeezing his thigh and making him moan softly.

 

Jimin throws one of his legs over Jungkook’s lap, positioning himself over him like they used to so often. Both of them loved this position — Jimin was always up for a ride and according to Jungkook he loved how beautiful Jimin looked above him. The blond grinds down on him, not applying too much pressure but Jungkook still moans into his mouth wantonly, his cock chubbing up in his pants. Jimin almost drools at the thought, licking at Jungkook’s tongue and sucking on his lips as quickly as he can. He can’t get enough and since the first step has already been taken, Jimin is finding it too hard to stop.

 

“We should—“ Jimin starts, his sanity making itself known somewhere between heated kisses and whines shared between the pair. “We should stop.”

 

“I don’t want to—“ Jungkook is quick to reply, now trailing feather light kisses to Jimin’s neck as he unbuttons the third button on his pristine white shirt — the first two had been undone as a fashion statement before he even came to the wedding. “I want you ,” Jimin wants him too, desperately, but a realization that dawns on him much too quickly forces him to seize up and get away. Looking dumbfounded, Jungkook opens his eyes quickly and wipes the spit away from his lips, worry flashing across his face once he sees the state Jimin is in.

 

“I can’t believe I just did that— oh fuck, jesus, fuck”

 

Jungkook doesn’t have a clue as to what’s going on, to him, one minute he has an armful of whiny Jimin grinding into him, the second the latter looks like he’s minutes away from a mental collapse. “What’s going on?!”

 

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have— I shouldn’t have reciprocated I’m so sorry.” Almost close to tears, Jimin wipes at his lips too, not liking the uncomfortable cold feeling around on his skin. “We shouldn’t have done that—“

 

“Jimin, what the fuck is going on?!”

 

“You’re dating someone— I know, uh I know Yoongi told me a while ago.” He’s close to sobbing at this point. It’s such a strange feeling because he’s missed Jungkook so much, being with him felt like something finally went his way, like he’d get a second chance to make all his wrongs right; on the other hand, he would rather die than contribute to ruining someone’s relationship — even if it breaks his heart, at the end of the day he had his chance and it didn’t work out. “God I’m such a piece of shit”

 

Sighing, Jungkook comes up to him. Each one of his movements is calculated yet gentle and after a little hesitance from Jimin’s part, he has him locked in his arms again. “Calm down”

 

“How can I calm down?! If anyone did this to me I’d be heartbroken. What are we going to do?! Will you tell them—“

 

“I’m not dating anyone.” Jungkook shuts him up nonchalantly. “I went on three dates with someone a year ago. That’s it— I’m not dating anybody.”

 

“Then why—“

 

“Either he told you a while ago and you forgot,” Jungkook starts, head tilted in thought and his pointer finger scratching the back of his head. “Or he was just messing with you.”

 

“He wouldn’t—“ Jimin thinks about it for a second, remembering how much Yoongi had supported and wanted for them to end up together at one point. “Well, actually, yeah he might have.” Jimin huffs, amused, nuzzling back into Jungkook’s chest.

 

Yoongi had probably wanted to make Jimin jealous, it did work the first time Jimin had heard about it but the pair’s meetings were so seldom and far in between, Jimin just accepted it as truth and tried twice as hard to stay out of Jungkook’s way. “Does this mean—“

 

“It can mean whatever you want it to mean.” Jungkook responds when the blond can’t seem to find the right words. “I know we left a lot of things unsaid but...I feel like it’s not the end of us.”

 

Jimin feels goosebumps spread through his skin, it’s hard to actually believe his ears and not make some outlandish excuse as to how this just cannot be real, how it’s probably a joke but still he pulls through and gazes up at Jungkook after he turns in his arms. “I— You’re serious?” He can’t help but question, always the one to doubt himself and try to make sure as many times as humanly possible, “I’ve been thinking about us...a lot lately. I’m sorry for the way it got at the end, I think we did need some time apart to know what’s it like,”

 

Jungkook nods and looks like he wants to say something but Jimin doesn’t let him yet. “I was really emotional and— I don’t know, thinking about it now I don’t know why I kept complaining about everything; it seems so stupid now but despite that it doesn’t excuse that I hurt you a lot, too.”

 

“Jimin—“ Jungkook tries to interject, always the one to reassure and take the full responsibility for things even when it’s not even his fault. The older takes his hands and intertwines them, his thumb running over the back of Jungkook’s hand.

 

“It’s true, we both know that. If you can forgive me I can—“ his eyes mist up and glaze over with tears, Jimin can’t help himself. “I promise I’ll never hurt you again,” his voice keeps breaking in the middle of his words and he’s fairly certain had it not been for such an emotional speech, Jungkook would’ve teased him. “I just wanted to tell you for years now that… I accepted you and I loved you how you were back then, even if you don’t believe me. But I realize I might not have given the impression”

 

Jungkook doesn’t say anything for a long while and even if it’s becoming a little award, Jimin is glad he’s not making excuses or telling him it’s okay — because it’s not. It feels like a huge weight has been lifted off his heart, Jimin feels like he can finally breathe again since he got the confession off his chest. Even if the pair don’t end up together some way, at least he’s managed to do this.  

 

“Can I kiss you?” Is what Jungkook says instead; his eyes hooded and soft at the same time. They’ll have time to make things clear later — clearly both of them want this. Nodding, Jimin gets closer and closer to his face, lips touching lightly, feeling like two feathers colliding and merging into each other slowly. So slowly.

 

Jungkook licks at Jimin’s bottom lip, his hand trailing over his side to his sensitive neck—

 

“Oh. My. God.” Seokjin enunciates each word like he’s just seen a ghost, mouth hanging open for dramatic effect. “You fuckers—“

 

Scared, Jimin jumps up and darts toward him. Then, he pulls Seokjin outside from the doorstep and closes the door behind him. “Shhh!” Shushing him, he then stomps a few times petulantly. “One word and you’re done.”

 

“Oh good! I feel like i’m part of some secret club, this is so exciting!” Seokjin smiles widely, claps his hands in excitement and winks at them both, sliding his arm through Jimin’s, linking them together. “Oh right, before I forget, Namjoon was looking for you Kookie,”

 

Jungkook is still red in the face from how much he had blushed, “Has he said why?”

 

“Nope, he did seem nervous though,” Seokjin looks unbothered for the kind of news he’s just delivered. “Now, you tell me what’s going on here.” He turns to Jimin, then adjusts the pink ribbon tied around his neck, murmuring something about how annoyingly itchy it is for something so expensive. Jungkook’s hand slips from Jimin’s, instead delivering a kiss to it with a promise of meeting him back inside the venue and so he disappears; quick steps echoing around the empty space before he shuts the door behind himself but not before sending Jimin another flying kiss.

 

“Hello?! Earth to Jimin,” 

 

The blond laughs, chuckling heartily as the pair start walking towards the exit, too — much slower though. “I wouldn’t say we got back together, but— It’s a start and I’m really hopeful.” Jimin holds the door open for Seokjin to walk through, then goes back inside himself. “I think it’s good, we’ve clearly both missed each other a lot and I think we’re much more mature to handle a relationship now.”

 

“God, listening to you say that... it’s like my baby bird is finally flying away from his nest,” Bringing Jimin’s head to his chest, Seokjin hugs him tightly despite Jimin’s protests saying he’s going to kill the other if anything happens to his carefully styled hair. “Shut up, it’s hairsprayed.”

 

“Still!” Jimin giggles once he’s finally freed from Seokjin, noticing Jungkook standing not too far away once they step into the reception again — he’s talking to Namjoon still and the blond wonders what’s it about. “Don’t tell anyone yet though, please.”

 

“Oh god, honey, no.” Seokjin looks offended and Jimin can’t fault him for it, the whole friend group knows he’s a very dedicated secret keeper and takes the job seriously. “You should go up there, with them.”

 

“What about you? Come with me.”

 

“I’ll be there, I’ll go find Yoongi first,” Seokjin says, exasperated. Nodding, Jimin takes his arm away and adjusts Seokjin’s ribbon before leaving, making it look pretty and presentable. With each step, he’s getting closer to Jungkook and the feeling of giddiness is inescapable. Still trying to keep his composure and not blow their cover though, Jimin tries his best to steel his expression with every breath he takes, tries to not make himself too obvious. Hell, if anyone questions him, he can always just say he’s happy for the newly wedded couple too — it wouldn’t be a lie either, to see his two best friends so utterly happy and in love is truly one of the best things Jimin has ever witnessed in his entire life.

 

“Wait! Jimin!” Seokjin yells from somewhere behind him and Jimin turns, expectant expression on his face. Smiling fondly, Seokjin laughs to himself and runs up to him, “Told ya! Remember?”

 

Smiling, Jimin nods. “I remember.”




─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───




“You’re doing it again,” Namjoon murmurs softly, trying hard to pretend like he’s reading his book before he gives up and lies his head beside Jin who hadn’t even tried to study — was too tired for it. “Do you think he knows he snores?” He asks curiously, poking Jin’s cheek to annoy him and make him stop somehow.

 

Jimin disregards the question, too curious as to what Namjoon has meant with the previous comment. “Doing what again?!”

 

Slurping his drink loudly, Namjoon gives up on trying to make Jin stop snoring and looks up at Jimin again, both dimples on full display but he looks sheepish. “Ogling Jungkook.”

 

Jimin knows there’s no point in denying, Namjoon knows him so well that sometimes he thinks it’s way too much for two friends with no further involvement with each other. “I can’t help it.” Jimin admits, embarrassed flames licking at his pillow cheeks. “This is so embarrassing… He’s just too hot, it’s unfair to me.”

 

“Homosexuals—“

 

“Hey! You do the same shit with Taehyung!” Jimin fires back, teasing tone still thick in his voice but it quickly dies down when he sees the two people they were just gossiping about come closer and closer to them, Jimin insincticely scooches back, almost sitting on the ground instead of the blanket. “What the hell—“ He whispers, but Taehyung’s voice asking Namjoon to come talk to him for a second overtakes him. Jimin doesn’t even hear what Taehyung says to his best friend because the object of his affections is standing right there in all his glory, muscles out and smiling down at Jimin.

 

He’s wearing a white muscle shirt, Jimin wonders how he’s staying warm but playing ball with his friends earlier probably has something to do with it. It somehow warms his heart that Jungkook would stop and come here with Taehyung just so the latter wouldn’t feel awkward doing it. 

 

“Hey,” he says, voice raspy from all the yelling, Jimin is just about ready to collapse into a puddle. “I’m Jungkook, Taehyung’s friend. Nice to meet you.”

 

“N-nice to meet you.” Jimin finally finds his tongue and remembers how to use it. “I’m Minnie—“ Fuck. “Uh, I mean Jimin.” He quickly corrects himself and tries not to worry too much about Jungkook’s amused smile. “He’s Jin.” The blond points out in his panic, realizing the uselessness of introducing Jin when he’s literally asleep, too late.

 

“Nice to meet you, Jin.” Jungkook bows to the unmoving stranger, but Jin lets out a bigger whine and scrunches up his nose in response. “I don’t think he’s happy to see me.” Jungkook laughs trying to dissipate the tension and Jimin falls head over heels again. It just feels nice for someone to not really pay attention to how awkward he is or worse, make fun of him for it.

 

“It’s okay, he’ll get used to you. Jinnie’s really nice.”

 

“Oh, glad to know you’d want me around long enough for that.” Jungkook catches him, teasing unrelentingly.

 

Blushing, Jimin decides it’s now or never. Either he steps over his shyness or let’s it make him miserable for years to come. He doesn’t want to live like this anymore so he takes the next step. “Yeah, actually.”

 

“Oh—“

 

“Jeon!” Someone yells from behind Jungkook, intruding on the moment and catching the younger’s full attention much to Jimin’s displeasure. “C’mon, man.”

 

Jungkook signals something back and pokes his tongue out at whoever interrupted them, throwing the ball to a couple people waiting for him before he turns and apologizes to Jimin bashfully. Soon enough he shakes the other’s hand and grips it tightly — Jimin drools — then bids him goodbye and leaves a star-struck Jimin sitting on his pretty little picnic blanket looking at Jungkook’s back like a love-sick puppy.

 

“You guys will end up together. I vibe with it to be honest,”

 

Jimin jumps three feet into the air, face contorting in a grimace at the sudden sound. Jin’s snores had gotten so quiet Jimin forgot he was there at all while staring at Jungkook. “Jesus Christ! Warn a guy.”

 

“Nobody warned me I’d have to witness blatant homosexuality today, so take this as payback.”

 

“Your pseudo-homophobia isn’t funny.” Jimin fires back, fighting a smile while he’s at it. But then, he sits down beside Jin, putting his face in his hands and sighing pathetically. “He was just being friendly…”

 

“Why do you always do that?!” Exasperated, Jin bumps his shoulder and rubs it quickly after. “He wasn’t just being nice to you. He wants you, baby.”

 

“Oh my god!” The blond grips his green cardigan and pulls it over his chest, somehow trying to hide his flaming cheeks in it to avoid Jin’s knowing eyes. “You think so?”

 

“You’re such a nerd, oh my god.”

 

Jimin doesn’t have the time to respond with how quickly Namjoon comes back, eyes all dopey and soft. “What’s happening?”

 

“Nothing!—“

 

“Jiminie has a crush on that hot hunk over there,” Jin shrugs nonchalantly, tilting his head back to where Jungkook has returned to, sweaty arms glinting in sunlight deliciously. They’re so big Jimin can’t stop fantasizing about having them grip him around his waist. “Jeez, you’re about to climb him like a tree!”

 

“Shut up!” Jimin almost screams, embarrassment swimming in his belly and filling him up right up to his throat. He can feel his heartbeat ring in his ears and this is probably not something to get so worked up over, but he can’t help it. “Please stop talking, please I’m begging.”

 

Only when Jimin thinks he’s in the clear — Judging from Jin’s apologetic eyes and Namjoon rubbing his back softly, — the only thing that could make this worse ends up happening. 

 

“I heard that! I’m down though,” Jungkook yells out from behind them with a teasing laugh and Jimin is ready to combust into fine dust only to be blown away by the soft wind currently making a mess out of his carefully styled hair. “Let me know, Minnie, yeah?”

 

“He will!” Namjoon replies excitedly, waving at the small group of people that have gathered around Jungkook now that he’s stopped throwing the ball. Jimin wishes the ground would swallow him whole, though he can’t deny the flutter in his heart at the mention of being with Jungkook or the latter not finding the idea quite as offensive as Jimin thought he would. 

 

Jin’s eyes light up with mirth, the blond already knows another wave of teasing is heading his way. “So?! You heard him, speak up, twink.” 

 

“Shutupshutupshutupshutup!”