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when you’re not yet done

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She looked so small underneath her, mouth opened up in a little ‘O,’ eyes screwed shut. Allison gripped her thighs, securing them even more tightly around her waist. “You’re doing so well,” she praised, dragging her hips forward, hearing the woman underneath her hiss at the angle the toy had reached within her. Vanya reached between her legs, brushing her fingers over her own clit. Wanting some sort of stimulation, Allison angled Vanya’s head down, maneuvering her and hissing out a command for Vanya. Though she’d expected her to at least say something in response, she didn’t, just closing her mouth around her nipple obediently, making a small noise as she continued to take in the sensations of it all. 

Vanya moved back only a few minutes later, telling her, “I’m clo—”

Allison slapped Vanya’s hand away from where she was still touching herself, roughly thumbing at her clit until sweet moans were filling the air, only moving her hand when she asked her to, with a small little mewl. After taking off the harness, knowing it would eventually get uncomfortable, Allison pulled Vanya’s sweat-soaked body to her own, listening to the small, heaving breaths she let out. “You good?” she asked, nails trailing over the woman’s smooth stomach, remembering a few nights she’d brought women home with her before, at after-parties for premiers or at a few bars, late into the night. 

“I’m alright,” she yawned. “I want to…”

“What do you want, Vanya?” Her voice was softer than she’d often heard from herself, but then she wasn’t often with the people she’d grown up with. Even though she and Vanya had never been close when they were younger, there was still a tenderness that she held for all of them, if only because she knew all the shit that every one of them had been through. “You can tell me, V. I won’t mind hearing it.”

“You’re different.” She turned around, facing her, hair just as soaked as her skin. Maybe it had been a while for her.

Allison hadn’t seen her in nearly eight years by this point. Almost immediately, they’d rushed to Vanya’s place, and Allison hadn’t even thought much about it when she’d asked if she’d had any toys after they’d gone down on one another, figuring there wasn’t any shame between them after that. “I wouldn't have… Why…”

As she continued to stammer out, Allison resisted the urge to laugh, never having seen her flustered in such a… delightful way. Had Vanya always been this adorable? Or was it just some sort of deceptive, post-orgasm haze, making her feel things that she didn’t actually feel? Most of her memories of Vanya hadn’t been—

Well, nothing she’d ever felt for her had felt what she was feeling now. 

Tucking a strand of hair back behind her ear, wanting an excuse to touch the woman’s cheek, Allison said, “I don’t know why I’m here. If that’s what you were asking.”

“Are you going to stay?”

A small noise left her mouth. She probably would stay the night, figuring it was probably only right, but… 

“For a little bit,” Allison promised. She was starting a new project soon, and it didn’t really matter if she even wanted to say, which she didn’t want to think about right now. Analyzing this would only make her panic. Really, this wasn’t something that she should be thinking about at all. Neither her nor Vanya likely wanted anything to come from this, right? 

“How long is a little bit?” Vanya shifted closer, chest pressing to her. Allison tried not to think of her pebbled nipples against her skin, figuring that she’d only suggest another round, which would only confuse her more. The woman’s mouth was pressing to her neck, nipping at her skin before tipping her chin up, leaning just to where she was whispering into her ear, like they were sharing secrets only they could know, “A week? A day? Just the rest of the night?”

“For sure the rest of the night,” Allison decided, stroking her hair soothingly. “Unless you don’t—”

Vanya kissed her. “Stay as long as you want.”

It was almost desperate, like she needed her to stay. Like if she abandoned her, another part of her would be that much more broken. Allison’s gut twisted, knowing that she would be another person added to the list of people who left Vanya Hargreeves. Though it was probably not a super long list, it was composed of significant figures within her life, people she’d known as long as she’d been alive. She didn’t think it was fair for Vanya’s insecurities to worsen by Allison leaving her, honestly. It wasn't like either of them had ever loved each other, even regards to friendship. Maybe that was heartless, but it was true. She considered herself a realistic person, and any realistic person would know that this would probably never last, not when they weren’t the most significant people in the world to each other, not when they’d both know that if they stayed together after this. Ripping off the band-aid after this would be the kindest thing Allison could do, and she’d make it as quick as possible. 

“It won’t be that long.” Her voice was still gentle, but it was firm, too, not wanting her to get the wrong idea here. “I’m sor—”

“Don’t apologize. I didn’t think… That this would be anything… significant,” Vanya said, not moving out of Allison’s grasp, nonetheless. “I’m not upset with you, but I hope… Could we try to talk some more? Like, actually talk?”

She could try that, surely. If it wasn’t too painful for her. Just hearing the desperation within her voice was enough to feel nervous pangs in her chest. “Yeah, I can try that.” Not really promising that it would work out if she did, knowing that it would be unfair to suggest that it would. “It’s just kind of hard to hear your voice… To talk with anybody we’d grown up with.” To be fair, one of them was dead, one of them had been lost for thirteen years, and one of them was off in space. She didn’t know where Diego was, not that he was likely that far away from the city. Klaus could be anywhere, but Allison was pretty sure he wasn’t dead. “I just… It’s hard to look at you and not think of everything we went through.”

“That’s… Yeah, that’s fair.” Her voice was sheepish, but it was understanding. It occurred to Allison that this was the most they had ever talked to one another, the most civil she’d ever tried to be with Vanya. She could actually somewhat imagine a world where they’d been friends, had both wanted to be around one another. Even though they were only talking right now because they’d been forced together from the moment they’d been born, Allison could see, in another life, wanting to be her friend. “Don’t feel like you have to… I just think it’d be nice, you know? To have someone?”

It really would be nice.