Willow sat on the stool in Sebastian’s room, leaning over the table to pluck a blueberry out of the bowl she had sat in front of him. Her bottom lip caught between her teeth to suppress a smile when Sebastian’s dark eyes flitted up to hers. A brow rose, and he rolled his eyes. He smiled, oh , his smile was so charming-- he smiled widely, genuinely, showing his teeth. He chuckled and Willow’s heart fluttered. Yoba, she felt like a kid in high school again, this crush was getting too much for her. She was honestly expecting to go into cardiac arrest any day now, the things this man did to her pulse.
“Give me just five more minutes and I’ll be finished.”
“You said that five minutes ago!” Willow complained, laughing.
“ Yoba , you’re such an impatient brat,” He groaned, stretching back in his chair, but the smile never left his lips.
“So what? You know you love it,” She spoke without thinking, looking back up to meet his gaze. His eyes watched her lips where she rolled the blueberry against them. She felt her face flush as she pressed the blueberry against her tongue and into her mouth. He looked back up to her eyes and there was a darkness there that was completely foreign but instantly recognizable, it sent a shiver down her spine. He went back to his computer screen, shifting in his seat. Willow leaned back onto her stool, heart racing in her chest. No, no. She had to be reading into things. She had to.
The next few minutes dragged on like hours, Willow chewing the skin of the blueberry, eyes dancing from the varnished surface of his desk to his pale, veiny hands typing out codes to his face, eyes shifting over every character printed on the screen and every once in a while dashing to where she sat before quickly looking away. Alternative music played in the background from Sebastian’s personal playlist, but she could barely hear it over the thrumming of blood in her ears.
She heard him hit one of the keys with finality, and she looked up to see him swivel to face her. “Alright, there. I’m finished… for a little while, anyway.”
Willow grinned despite herself.
Willow was curled up against Sebastian on his couch, flipping through one of his old graphic novels, but he could hardly focus on where she was in the story. She had complained that she was too high to try reading something, but there she was, buried in the panels of-- fuck, he couldn’t even remember the name of it now, he was way too focused on the warmth of her thighs against his jeans, only two layers of fabric separating them. He swallowed, mouth suddenly watering. He craved her, he realized all at once, regardless of how much he tried to deny it.
He shifted, draping one arm over the back of the couch, and he considered letting his arm drift down and wrap around her shoulders-- it wasn’t an uncommon gesture for them, he and all his friends were pretty physical, but now it felt different, now it felt wrong, what if he made her uncomfortable--
His shifting disturbed her reading, and she looked up at him, pale eyes bright despite how high she claimed to be, and he couldn’t help but cup her jaw, hold her head so she was looking up at him, and he didn’t miss the color that flushed her face.
“Your eyes are so fuckin’ pretty,” He murmured softly, “A little green, a little blue, like… if the moon was terraformed, or something, shit, I dunno--”
He almost rambled on, but Willow’s hand reached up and wrapped around the back of his neck, bringing his lips down, crashing against hers. They were soft, and tasted like honey lip balm and lingering smoke and blueberries. She pulled away too quickly to savor, and she blinked up at him, face scarlet, mouth falling open, and he was certain she was just about to try to apologize but he beat her to her mark, pulling her face in and pressing his lips to hers again, and she sighed against his mouth and melted into his touch. He shivered as her hands slithered from his shoulder down, around, up behind his back. A low sound rumbled from his chest at the touch, and she moaned, sliding closer to him. He brought his hands down to her waist, pulling her fully into his lap, hands running up the backs of her thighs and ghosting over the curve of her ass-- she was so hot to the touch, and he felt cold as ice, and every single one of her fingers crawled over his clothes and made him shiver.
His lungs burned for air and he was remiss to pull away, panting softly as he met her gaze-- all red cheeks and pupils blown wide, she licked her lips and his breath caught in his throat.
“Fuck,” He groaned lowly, “You’re so fucking hot.”
She breathed out a curse at the compliment and he pulled her into him again, one arm cradling her back while his lips found hers again. He didn’t hold back-- not sure he could if he tried-- teeth nipping at her lower lip as he lifted her and pressed her back against the futon. A vulgar sound left her as he pinned her down, one hand finding hers and pinning it to the cushions while the other propped up her jaw as he migrated slowly down, growling by her ear as he planted open-mouthed kisses and puffed breaths of hot air, lavishing her with his tongue.
Her voice fluttered out of her, muffled at first but becoming ever more open as he worked over her throat. His teeth caught the skin at the curve of her throat and sucked, and she sang .
“ Fuck ,” He whispered against her skin, “Fuck, you sound so fucking good, holy shit.”
She only whimpered in response. He sat up, eyes rolling over her frame. She already looked weak-- her face was red, lips puffy from his abuse, eyes half-lidded and blissed out before he had even done anything, yet. She squirmed underneath him, and he breathed in the majesty of her.
“Fuck, Willow-- are we, are we actually going to do this?” Sebastian asked, voice already rough in a whisper.
“ Please ,” She begged, “If you don’t, I might go crazy.”
He moaned, a barely-audible sound, at her just begging him. He laid back on top of her, finding the other side of her neck as he pressed more hot, eager kisses along her pulse, “ Fuck ,” He hissed when she rubbed against him, “When you put it that way...”
He separated for a moment to pull her shirt up to her collarbones, revealing her bare breasts. She joked about how they were small-- small enough to get away without a bra most days, but he was expecting something much less than what she was gifted with. He brought his hand down, scooping one up perhaps too roughly, rolling her nipple under his thumb, mouth latching like a leech onto the skin around her sternum. He counted her ribs under his tongue and left as dark a mark as he could on each one, grinding against her core. She moaned loudly, and he paused in panic, hand freeing her own as he placed his thumb across her lips.
“Shh, shh, fuck -- We can’t be too loud, okay? Someone could hear us.”
He didn’t think Willow could get any redder. She blinked wildly, before nodding in his grip. He moved his hand from her lips and kissed her one more time, eyes fluttering closed as he readjusted his weight.
He shifted down her body, kissing a line between her breasts, licking up the side of one before catching the nipple between his teeth and giving it a soft tug. Willow’s hand flew to her mouth and he could feel the vibrations of the sounds she was trying to make under his tongue, he shivered at the mere idea.
His cock was stiff against her hip in his pants and he tried hard to ignore it, hands going down to Willow’s waist, holding her still so she wouldn’t overstimulate the organ before he even got a chance to show off. He cursed under his breath as he nibbled at the hard skin of her abs, around her belly-button ring that glinted in the dim light. He chanced a glance upwards and moaned against her skin. Her fingers were buried in her mouth, sucking hard to keep from making noise, other hand tangled in her bright hair, eyes heavily lidded and desperate looking, hickies showing off his journey so far. Fuck , if he could go back in time and tell 15-year-old Sebastian that he’d actually managed to fuck a girl that looked like one of those punk pornstars he got off to so much he’s not sure he’d have believed it. He buried his face into the flesh besides her hip and sucked until he could hear her rasping squeals past her fingers. He licked over the spot, bright red and purple already before he moved to unbutton her jeans.
He made short work of the fly and pulled her pants down, but the sight before him made his breath catch in his throat. All down the inside of Willow’s lean, muscular thighs were faint, white lines that he knew all too well. But from every line, every single scar that rose out of her skin, a tiny, watercolor tattoo sprang up. They were everywhere-- all down the inside of both thighs, a garden of soft hues and grasses, ferns and clovers. His chest heaved suddenly, and he thought for a moment it would be too much, he thought he might start crying at the sight.
Willow sat up on her elbows before looking away, and he looked up and saw the shame in her face.
“I-I-- I’m sorry--” She started to stumble over an apology, for what he couldn’t understand, but he squeezed the outside of her thigh tightly.
“You… You turned yourself into a garden,” He finally breathed.
She turned back to look at him, but she still wouldn’t meet his gaze.
“It’s… you know. It’s a reminder. To cut weeds. That healing takes time, like a seed growing to a flower. It’s… It’s worked, pretty well. I’ve been clean for a while. I-I’m sorry, I should have warned you--”
“It’s beautiful,” He spoke, clearly, firmly, and he’s certain she could see the adoration in his eyes, “Fuck, you’re beautiful.”
She swallowed, and he could see tears brimming in her eyes. He leaned over her again and kissed her, open-mouthed, one hand falling to her jaw while the other held him barely up off of her. He whispered praise between breaths, “You’re so fucking pretty, Willow,” “You’re a masterpiece,” “I’m so proud of you.”
He knew better than to dole out such serious praise, especially in the middle of a hookup. He couldn’t help it-- she made him feel things he hadn’t felt in ages, and more things he’s not sure he’s ever really felt. He let his hands run over her body until she started moaning again, and he moved back between her legs. He started at her knees, kissing over each flower, her legs spreading further and further the higher he got. One of her hands reached up and tangled in his hair and he groaned, licking a stripe up the inside of her thigh. He brought a hand up, floating right over her panties, before he looked up at her.
“Can I touch you here? Is that okay?” He asked deliberately, rubbing circles on the inside of her thigh. She nodded urgently, and when she realized that wouldn’t satisfy him, she breathed the softest, “Yes, yes please .”
A growl rumbled in his chest, Yoba, she was so desperate for him. He let his finger brush a line across her panties and he moaned at how slick she was.
“ Fuck me, you’re so wet,” He spoke softly. She keened in response.
He told himself to take it slow, really make her feel something-- he wanted her so badly to come back for more, he wanted to give her something she wouldn’t forget. But he wasn’t as patient as he wished he was, opting to just throw her knees over his shoulders and lift her hips, taking her panties down and out of the way. He moved between her again, but she stopped him with her hands. He hesitated for a second, fearing his impulse fucked him up, that she wanted him to stop-- but then she started tugging at the fabric of his shirt.
“Off, please ,” She begged, “I want to see you.”
“ Fuck ,” He met her heavy gaze and obliged, pulling the article up and over his head, before doing the same for her. Her hands wandered over his skin and his breathing hitched as she somehow found all his sensitive spots. He sighed, grabbing both her hands and pressing them above her head, fingers interlocking, lips meeting, and Sebastian found himself lost in the sensation of it all.
She pulled away first this time, whimpering and gasping, “Please, Seb, please fuck me.”
He didn’t hesitate. He moved her wrists so he could press them one-handed, and she followed his wordless guidance eagerly. He made a mental note of that. His other hand snuck down between her legs, finding her engorged clit easily, and rubbing it lightly as he slipped his fingers between her folds. She gasped, trembling under his touch, and he brought his fingers back up, over her slit, fingers slick with her arousal, and he circled her clit. She bucked into his hand, moaning his name, and his eyes fluttered shut.
“Fuck, you sound so fucking pretty. Sing for me, baby. Sing for me.”
She did, moaning and whimpering as he circled her clit twice more before sliding a finger inside her, then two. Her eyes rolled back and she ground against his palm. He curled his fingers inside her, flexing and relaxing, wiggling enough to keep her occupied but never satisfied. He couldn’t help himself, she looked so fucking beautiful this desperate, this debauched, he wanted to save a mental picture of this forever. He slipped a third finger inside of her and began to pump, and her hands wrapped around his palm, clawing for purchase.
“Fuck, fuck,” She groaned, “Seb-- Sebastian I’m gonna c-cum--”
Fuck , he wanted to take her, to feel her wrapped around him. He wanted her to cum around his cock but he held himself back from just pulling his fingers out and pressing himself in their place. This wasn’t going to be her only orgasm, he was going to make sure of that.
“Cum for me,” He whispered in her ear, placing kisses around her earlobe, “Cum for me, Willow.”
She gasped, crying out as she came. He felt her walls clench around his fingers, and he tried to flex them against her as she rode out her orgasm.
“ Fuck, fuck, fuck ,” She panted, and he kissed her open mouth.
“Good girl,” He purred, “Do you think you’re ready for me? Because fuck , am I ready for you.”
“ Yes ,” She keened, before the haze in her eyes cleared and she furrowed her brow a little, “Wait, wait.”
He moved his hand from his waistband, sliding his fingers out of her. “Yeah, baby? What’s wrong?”
“I just… I’ve never slept with a guy before.”
Her face went red again, and it wasn’t from afterglow. She looked away from him. “I’ve… only slept with people without penises. I… I haven’t had a… a cock inside me before.”
Sebastian's breath rushed out of him, mouth falling open just a little bit despite himself. She… she hadn’t been fucked like this before? Was she… was she nervous? Fuck, she was so cute, she was so embarrassed.
“Wait, so… so you’ve never been, like, penetrated? Not even with a strap-on or something?” He whispered, feeling a grin float to his face.
She glanced up at him before immediately looking away again. He couldn’t help himself, he tilted her head so he could see her when she made her confession. She still wouldn’t meet his eye.
“N-No… Just like, like fingers and tongue.”
“ Fuck ,” He breathed despite himself, “S-Sorry. That’s… that’s a lot hotter than I-I was expecting it to be. Fuck.”
He felt his face flush. He thought himself better than to worry about stupid standards like virginity and shit like that-- and it’s not like she was a virgin anyway-- but he couldn’t ignore the way his cock twitched at the idea of being her first experience with penetration. He noticed how red her face had gotten, and he realized he was getting ahead of himself.
“Do you want to do this? You can say no,” He spoke softly, gently, ignoring how tight his pants felt.
“Yes, yes--” Willow practically gasped, “Please. I want you.”
He shuddered, closing his eyes for a moment as he finally allowed himself to palm his erection through his jeans. He felt her hands come up and meet his, before trailing over his waistband. He shimmied his pants down to his knees, before he grabbed her legs under her knees. She purred at the sight of him, hand drifting down to his hip, fingers trailing there.
“Can… can I?” She asked shyly.
“ Fuck yes, you can touch me all you’d like.”
Her hands wrapped around his length, pumping slowly, thumb trailing along the vein at his base. He hissed, eyes fluttering closed as she worked over him.
“You’re so big,” She whispered.
He opened his eyes to look down at her, and she met his gaze. He let go of her legs and leaned over her, her knees hooked over his waist and he ground down into her core. She gasped, moaning as he rubbed himself over her again, his lips pressing against her throat.
“G-Go slow, please, please go slow,” She whispered. He nodded, nuzzling against her neck.
“Of course I will, baby. I’ll be gentle.”
He hesitated, cursing himself for getting too comfortable.
“Wait here, I’ll be right back.”
Willow made an annoyed whine, but stayed put. Sebastian slid out of her grip and moved across the room, rifling through a drawer near his bed and pulling out a condom. He kicked himself the rest of the way out of his jeans and he cursed himself for probably killing the mood, but Willow giggled beneath her hand and pulled him back into her embrace.
“You’re so fuckin’ courteous,” She mumbled. He met her gaze and simply smiled.
“Yeah, you’re just saying that because you haven’t seen what I’m gonna do to you yet.”
The way her face turned scarlet and her eyes widened made him laugh. He opened the foil package and rolled the condom over his shaft. Willow brought her hands up and helped slide it on the rest of the way, pumping him a few times before wrapping her thighs around his hips.
He breathed deeply as he rubbed against her entrance, lining himself up. One hand reached under her thigh to hold her in place, and he rolled his hips forward. Fuck , she was tight. She moaned in his ear, and he glanced up at her face.
He slid a little deeper. He couldn’t help the grunt that snuck past his lips, her walls sending electricity through his cock as he tried his best to keep his composure.
“ Oooh ,” She gasped, one hand covering her mouth, the other wrapping firmly around his arm.
“ Fuck , you’re tight ,” He hissed into her ear, making her moan.
He finally slid all the way in, feeling her lips brush against his base, and for a moment he just basked in the euphoria of her , being all the way inside her, feeling her walls press and squeeze against him, feel her pulse through her.
“Oh fuck ,” He whispered, “Are you ready for me to move?”
She nodded enthusiastically. “Y-Yes yes please.”
With a soft grunt, he slowly pulled out, feeling her walls drag and cling with every inch, before sliding himself all the way back in. Willow moaned loudly, and quickly covered her mouth, eyes going wide.
Sebastian just leaned down, pressing kisses to her throat, “Mhh… you sound so pretty, Wil. I want to hear what those moans sound like without holding back one day.”
She whimpered from beneath her hand, but he continued, “For now, stay quiet like a good girl.”
He dragged his hips out of her again, crashing into her like a tide of euphoria, setting a slow, deliberate pace, earning squeaks and squeals half-muffled by her hand every time he pressed into her. He held her knee in place with one hand, leg braced on the floor while the other one rested on the futon. He grunted and growled, adding to Willow’s personal symphony with every thrust. Fuck , the friction and the heat made him moan. His hand slid from under her thigh to her hip, holding her closely. He looked up, eyes trailing up from where they were joined to her face, eyes closed, bottom lip pulled between her teeth, face flushed as she lost herself in the sensation. One of her hands came up and slid into his hair, pulling his bangs back so he could see her, and she him, and her glassy eyes opened.
“ Fuck , Seb--” She whispered weakly, “ Fuck , harder-- faster-- something, please --”
Oh , he groaned at the way she begged and easily obliged. He sat up, hands finding the fold of her knee and held them up and apart, and he snapped his hips into her. She moaned from under her hand, fingers trailing over his body. He shivered at even the lightest of touches. He lifted one of her ankles to his shoulder, immediately thrusting deeper, and they both cried out in unison. Soon every breath that was drawn in by Willow was a gasp, every exhale a moan, and her fingers curled into his skin. He could feel her nails leaving marks along the side of his ribs and he moaned , fuck, she felt so good, so good on him.
Sebastian growled, leaning over her once again, picking up a brutal pace. His fingers found her ribs, thumb rolling over the soft skin of her breast, while his other tangled in her hair. Her legs wrapped around his back, hips canted upwards, meeting his hips at every thrust. He panted, her fingers running up over his shoulder blades and nails digging into the skin. Words were lost to her, mouth unendingly whispering things close to language, but he was unable to make out anything beyond “ Yoba ,” “ Fuck yes ,” “ Sebastian .”
“ F-Fuck --” He grunted, feeling her walls clench around him. Her hands moved to grab his head, one hand pressing at the curve of his jaw, the other burying in his hair.
Her eyes met his own and he gasped. “ F-F-Fuck, S-Seb,” She stuttered, “ I-I’m gonna-- I-I’m gonna cum-- ”
“ Fuck, fuck, not yet, not yet, ” He warned breathlessly, “ Wait for me .”
Her chest heaved, and his hand cradled her head, pressing his forehead to hers. He was close, he knew he was close-- he felt so tight, so wound, he wanted to feel her cum around him. He growled and she moaned, rhythm turning into quick spasms as he chased the hot pleasure bringing him to his edge. His cock felt white-hot inside her.
“ Fuck, fuck fuck Willow ,” He grunted, “ Cum for me, cum for me, baby, please --”
He reached one hand down and rubbed her clit roughly, causing her to all but scream. Her walls clenched around him and his hips stuttered. He gasped at the tightness, eyes closing, a string of curses leaving his lips.
“ F-Fuck I’m cumming --” He groaned against her lips, pumping into her desperately as the tightness of his cock relaxed and ropes of cum spilled out of him and into the condom between the two of them.
He caught his breath for a moment, and as he floated down the first thing he noticed was how Willow was shaking, trembling. He opened his eyes to see tears streaming down hers, makeup staining her face.
“ Fuck ,” He cursed, heart siezed in panic, “I wasn’t too rough, was I? I’m so sorry--”
She pulled his lips down into a sloppy kiss, all teeth and tongue and hot breaths. “N-No, fuck, that was… that was incredible. Fuck , you’re so good.”
His heart swelled, and he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Fuck, you’re so beautiful.”
He did everything in his power not to collapse on top of her, instead opting to slowly, easily, pull out of her. “Here, let me clean up.”
She shifted, and he pressed a hand against her shoulder to keep her down. “No, you stay there. Let me take care of it.”
She blushed, nodding. He pulled the condom off of himself and tied it off before throwing it away, then grabbed a towel and wiped the slick from between his legs. When he turned back around, Willow’s eyes were already closed and her breathing slow. He breathed, a reverent sigh rolling past his lips. Abigail had never been so peaceful after sex, often immediately checking her phone or pulling on her clothes.
His heart stopped for a second. Fuck , he thought, Abigail .
She surely wouldn’t be mad at him, right? She said, numerous times, that what she and Seb had was just for fun, and she didn’t want to pursue anything with him. So… this was okay, right?
He tried to ignore the anxiety bubbling up in his chest as he walked over to where Willow laid, legs still spread. He knelt between them, and her eyes opened groggily. He took the towel and wiped the insides of her thighs before cleaning her center, fingers tracing over the flowers blooming in ink.
“You look exhausted,” He muttered.
She laughed. “You should lay down with me.”
“This couch isn’t big enough for two of us,” He spoke, playful look in his eye. He put the towel down and slid his arms underneath her.
“I mean, I thought it did fine--” She was cut off by a squeak as he lifted her up off the couch, cradling her in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck, pressing tightly against him as he moved her to his bed. His back protested, but the look on her face was worth it.
He laid her on the bed and she slithered underneath the covers. He joined her quickly, one hand brushing over the curve of her jaw. He hadn’t been so… intimate with someone since… well, he couldn’t really remember when. He swallowed, leaning forward to press a chaste kiss to her lips.
When he pulled back, Willow opened her mouth to speak, before quickly shutting it. When she did speak, she muttered a soft, “Thank you.”
He smiled, arms tangling around her, her face burying into his chest, and he prayed she couldn’t hear how fast his heart was beating.
Fuck me , he thought to himself, I’m in love .