It’s the morning of the first day of his university career, and Kongpob feels like shit.
He’s woken up alone in his double bed, sheets creased beside him, indent on his pillow where his partner from the night before had slept - cold, when he slips a hand over the new bedding he’d only bought last week.
Memories of the night before splinter his thoughts, as he checks the time and levers himself up. His head is throbbing and he rushes for the bathroom cabinet as a wave of nausea threatens the contents of his stomach.
Since those are mostly skewers of juicy pork and practically a whole bottle of Sangsom, he’s not overly worried if he has to eject them, but if he does have to spend five minutes retching over the porcelain throne, then he’s going to be off schedule and then he might actually be late.
Kongpob Suthiluck is never late.
Quickly, he pops a pair of painkillers and slides into his shower, scrubbing away the scent of an aftershave that isn’t his.
He kind of remembers the guy. Well, vaguely.
He was definitely handsome.
Kongpob thinks he had a sweet face with these cute little dimples.. but then, there’s been a few guys like that in his past so it’s possible he’s remembering someone else. Some other nameless fuck.
There is one thing he definitely remembers though, his voice.
It had been fierce and commanding and everything Kongpob had wanted from his first night of freedom away from the family home.
Being ordered to suck cock had been exactly what Kongpob had needed in fact. It had taken away all his nerves about today. To the point that, other than wanting to remain on schedule, Kongpob was feeling pretty damn relaxed about the first day of Engineering.
Oh! Something about Engineering.. As he slides his fingers through the hair at his groin, feeling a telltale slick of lube, he filters through his thoughts and tries to remember if he’d told the guy he was going to be in engineering, or if the guy had said that he was in engineering? Or maybe Kongpob had outed himself and told the guy that he wanted to be in Economics instead?
Well, whatever it was.. it hardly mattered now.
The man he’d met after his eighth shot hadn’t exactly given a shit what Kongpob was studying. He’d clearly been just as drunk and only up for a round of good sex before he’d sneaked out without even leaving a note.
Kongpob shakes the water from his hair, reaching for his towel.
Shame. He can tell from the twinge in his ass that the guy had been a great fuck. He wouldn’t have minded meeting up to enjoy a second round.
Never mind. Time to get ready.
He’s adjusting his tie when the hazers enter so he misses the brooding looks they cast over the room, right before they step onto the stage in a staggered line.
Kongpob’s gaze slides over them, eyes catching on the one standing in the centre, something in the set of his jaw telling him that the freshmen are about to get it.
And they do. The guy is yelling at them, calling them out for their actions before they’ve even finished their first day at uni.
It pisses Kong off. Moreso when the head hazer, Arthit, sets them a task that feels impossible to complete. Of course, as a Suthiluck, he can’t let it slide and stands up to say just that, but as he comes eye to eye with Arthit, something clicks into place and he abruptly drops back to the floor, crossing his legs and ducking his head.
Shit! It’s him!
Arthit stares at the boy in shock. No-one covered what to do when a freshman stands to speak and then.. doesn’t. It wasn’t in their training.
He casts a glance at Knott who shakes his head in confusion and then to Prem who just glares fiercely back, staying in role.
So Arthit decides to ignore it. If the freshman has decided that he is no match for Arthit, then so be it. He’s not going to call him out on it and have to face off in front of the new batch of juniors if he doesn’t have to.
Instead, he finishes explaining the task, eyes straying to the young man now and then, though he never lifts his head again, probably too embarrassed, Arthit thinks.
Kongpob is embarrassed. But not for the reason Arthit thinks.
Obviously, he will have to face his senior at some point, but in the middle of a hall full of his peers and hazers? No thanks.
Kongpob Suthiluck has done some difficult and embarrassing things in his eighteen years, but he’s never had to do a literal walk of shame quite like this one would be.
But then, as he listens to the rest of the hazing, head still tucked into his chest, he wonders if his senior would even recognise him from the night before?
Sure, Kongpob knows how drunk he himself had been, but surely Arthit had drunk just as much?
Unless, he liked to prey on younger men who are completely pissed?
But Kongpob doesn’t think that’s likely, given that this guy is the head hazer and probably under the watchful eye of members of the faculty as well as his own peers.
He must have been drunk too.
Kongpob itches to remember. Now he’s seen his face there are more little moments popping into his head.. and popping something else as well as he remembers moans and groans, the slide of soft hands, the roughness as Arthit had pulled his cock from his pants and begun to play with him.
When the hazers dismiss them, Kongpob can’t risk standing. Around him the rest of the first years are trading names and making plans to meet up. But Kongpob is stuck where he is, his rather substantial problem tenting his pants below the curve of his arms which he has protectively wrapped around himself.
It’s a long time before he exits the hall and trudges home.
Spotting Arthit from his balcony, as he lays out his towel, is a shock. The senior is resting against his own rail opposite and chatting easily on his phone.
He looks good in his low slung boxers and baggy tee shirt and Kongpob remembers sliding his hand up a similar shirt and caressing soft skin.
His memories are flooding his head now. Where there should be calculus and thermodynamics, there is a pale chest and two taut nipples, a trail of hair over a soft stomach and the beginnings of a V leading down to a thick cock and soft balls.
Kongpob shakes his head, trying to knock some sense into himself. He has work to do. He can’t spend his night wanking to memories of his last good fuck.. even if it was only yesterday and probably the best one he’s ever had now he recalls it.
He needs to study.
He heads inside and slumps at his desk, idly playing with a pencil until he realises he is sliding his hand up and down the length of the wood making his thoughts twist back to last night.
Inevitably, he ends up in bed, one hand trailing a path into his sleep pants, the other twisting his own nipple as he plays with himself.
He falls asleep, homework untouched, body sated and sleepy.
Arthit is in the canteen with Knott and Prem when Tootah and Bright show up. They’re babbling away and annoying him generally, so he shakes a soda and opens it up, spraying them lightly with the liquid.
“Oi! Arthit! My hair..” Tootah is enraged and immediately shakes his own soda, showering the table too.
Prem and Knott manage to leap out of the way but Arthit gets hit by a stream and ends up in the bathroom with Tootah by his side.
“What was that all about?” Tootah frowns, as he scrubs at his shirt with a damp paper towel.
Arthit surreptitiously checks the cubicles, then slides the lock on the bathroom door, “I might have wanted to talk to you..”
“What, and making me cherry flavoured was the best way to do that?” Tootah gives him a look in the mirror and Arthit wilts against the sink. “The only good time to be flavoured is when a guy’s giving you head, Arthit!”
Arthit’s face flushes and he groans, “Tootah! Sorry. I was just.. I mean.. Well..”
“Arthit spit it out! I have things to do, you know. I don’t particularly want to spend most of my lunch hour in a smelly bathroom with you.”
“I..” Arthit rolls his shoulders and then leans back, resting against the sink, “I kind of.. took your advice?”
“Which advice.. oh wait, you mean you finally bought some decent footwear? Because I’m not seeing anything different here..” Tootah gives him a once over and Arthit ducks his head.
“No, the.. other advice about the thing... with the.. you know.. that advice.”
Tootah gives him a knowing look, “If you can’t say it yet, then I’m shocked you think you’ve taken my advice Arthit.”
“Fine.” Arthit lifts his head and gives Tootah his fiercest glare, the one he’d practised in the mirror all summer in preparation for being head hazer, though it has no effect on his friend. Then he takes a deep breath, “Then I’ll say it. But only because you made me.”
Tootah drops his paper towel and turns to face Arthit fully, hands coming to rest on his hips, “Yes?”
“I told someone I’m gay.”
“Oh, Arthit!” Tootah starts to gush and Arthit holds up one hand, stopping him. He nervously clacks his tongue against the roof of his mouth and shuffles awkwardly as Tootah tilts his head in question.
“And.. I had sex.”
Tootah’s jaw drops at this revelation but after a few long beats of silence, he smiles and then leans in and pulls Arthit against his chest, circling him with his arms.
“You certainly know how to shock a guy.”
Arthit revels in the feeling of being held, it’s not often he sees his mother since he’s always worked to help out with the family finances and has lived away from home for much of his uni life, staying in the dorms so he can work three jobs over the summer.
But after a bit, he pulls away, wanting to see what Tootah actually thinks.
While confessing his burgeoning feelings about his sexuality to his friend had been terrifying, he’s so glad he did, because Tootah had been amazing and so supportive and full of good advice. Although, brightening up his whole wardrobe to make himself more sexually attractive was not something Arthit had followed up on.
His advice about going out and meeting someone though.. that advice he had taken.
“So?” His friend asks, going back to wiping at the soda stains on his shirt, “Who’s the lucky guy? Is it that Amp guy from your work? I know you had a secret crush on him.. remember that time I caught you checking out his ass in the reflection of the freezer?”
Arthit blushes. He does remember. It had been the catalyst for his conversation with Tootah about his sexuality after all.
“Not Amp, no.” Arthit says, wondering what his friend’s reaction will be when he does confess. He’s a little bit worried about that, but Tootah’s the only one who knows anything about how he’s feeling so he does want him to know if only so they can talk about it and he can offload a little.
“Then who? Come on Arthit! Your first time, I want all the details.. who topped? Was it good? Did you play safe?”
Arthit blushes as a flood of memories fill his head. The foreplay had been so intense that Arthit had cum before they’d even gotten to the sex - the guy holding his hands on the back of his head and urging him to thrust into his mouth had been far too much for an untouched virgin.
Luckily, he had somehow managed to get it up again, even through the haze of alcohol, though that might have been thanks to the way the man had turned on all fours to present his arse for Arthit to lick and then thoroughly pound.
Tootah coughs as he stares at Arthit, snapping him out of his daze, “Umm, yeah.. we were safe. And.. umm, me, I topped.”
“And?” Tootah looks like he might burst as he waits for Arthit to tell him how good it was.
“And..” He frowns, “I don’t know who he was.”
Arthit collapses against the wall, hugging his arms across his torso as he whispers, “I was drunk Tootah. I was really fucking drunk. I’m so..”
Tootah gathers him in his arms again, pulling him tight against his chest, Arthit’s tears melting into his engineering shirt. “Shhh.. it’s okay, it’s okay, Thit.. you’re safe. I’m here..”
Arthit lets him hold him as he fights against his tears, sniffling into Tootah’s already damp shirt, “I’m sorry.. I didn’t mean to.. I just.. I wanted to..”
“It’s okay, Thit. It’s okay. I’ve got you and you’re safe and it’s going to be okay.”
Kongpob strides into the canteen and observes the chaos around him. There are first years spread across the space completing a huge range of ridiculous tasks and he feels a little shiver of anticipation rush through him as he sees the hazers seated in the centre, watching with shrewd eyes.
Since he’d had his ‘little problem’ at the end of hazing yesterday, Kongpob hasn’t managed to meet a lot of his fellow freshmen, so he strides over to the nearest group and plops down at their table confidently.
He slides out a hand and introduces himself and is quickly welcomed by them all.
From a quick once over, it’s clear that Em fancies May, Oak is a total game head and will have little to contribute to the group dynamic, Maprang is a huge flirt and Tew is the serious and sensible one who will probably end up as class president or something.
“Have you gotten any signatures yet?” Another girl asks as she pauses by their table.
Em holds up a single finger, Oak just grunts and looks back at his game while Tew proffers his book which is filled with neat names,, “Just a few Prae, you?”
“Yeah, I have some.” She says, sliding her own signature book across the table. “But, I was thinking.. maybe we should ask the hazers? I mean, no-one has actually gone near them yet. Maybe we could be the first?”
Em recoils away and May pats his arm gently, “Em’s a little bit scared of them.”
“Huh?” Oak grunts again, “Why? They’re just students like us.”
“Well, I was hoping someone would come with me.” Prae says, hands on her hips as she looks down at them.
Kongpob revises his opinion of the group - clearly Prae is the one who should become their class president.
“I would, but that guy is giving me the eye, so I’m going that way.” Maprang swings her hips confidently as she strides away.
“What about you, new guy?” Prae asks as she gives Kongpob a once over.
Kong gulps, aware that going towards that table will be like stepping into the unknown. After all, he still doesn’t know if Arthit has recognised him yet. And if he has, he doesn’t have a clue what his reaction is going to be - finding out he fucked one of his own freshmen.
But, after they’ve drawn straws and Kongpob has lost, when he finds himself at Arthit’s table, there’s no flicker of recognition at all. In fact, the head hazer barely acknowledges them, leaving it to his subordinates as he leans into the one wearing the neck scarf and shows him something on his phone.
Bright has a great time though, making Prae shout that she likes him and making Kongpob do twenty push ups in a row.
While he’s doing the exercise, there’s a moment when he lifts his head and finds Arthit staring down at him, a confused expression fluttering across his face, but it’s gone before Kongpob can truly catalogue it, so he tries to push it out of his mind.
He leaves with only one signature, since the other hazers declined to make them do a task, and a feeling in his stomach that he doesn’t really understand.
As well as another lingering memory of being on all fours, presenting his arse to Arthit - that memory is the reason he tugs Prae away with bright red cheeks and a thundering sound in his ears.
Arthit has shown Tootah the bar he’d been at when he’d met his mystery man, and since he knows it well, Tootah is determined that they should go later tonight and see if anyone remembers anything about Arthit being there.
Arthit isn’t convinced. He’s not even sure he wants to know who the guy was, although it is messing with his mind that he can recall the sexy abs and the taste of his cum in his mouth, but not the exact colour of his hair or the shape of his face.
It’s not that Arthit is desperate to see the guy again, he’d just like to know who he’d lost his virginity with so he doesn’t feel.. so dirty.
Tootah has helped him to remember a little more from the time after the sex, when Arthit had still been drunk and the guy had been passed out on his pillows beside him and Arthit had done the walk of shame, trainers clutched in one hand as he had tried to sneak out without waking him.
He only knows it was a dorm room. Through the fuzz, he knows it was a dorm room that wasn’t far from his own, which does narrow it down a bit.. but not a whole lot since students from every year group and course live in the dorms near campus.
Waking up in his own bed, alarm clock ringing merrily from the opposite side of the room, trainers still clutched limply in one fist, Arthit’s first thought had been that he was glad he could still speak after ramming his throat on the other guys cock, sliding it back so far he’d choked himself briefly. If not, he would have been in trouble for his first day as head hazer, after all.
It’s rather a pleasant memory, that cock had been large and perfectly formed. It was a memory that he had wanked to again last night. But it didn’t stop the ache inside - he desperately wanted to know who he had willingly given his virginity to.
So, as he and Tootah watch the chaotic freshmen around them, they hatch a plan to head over to Sukhumvit later that evening and see what they can find out.
The only interruption is when a vaguely familiar junior comes to their table and has to do pushups for Bright. It’s strange how Arthit’s first thought is ‘pretty mouth’ and his second, ‘I wonder how that would feel wrapped around my..’ But he pushes his fleeting desire down and turns back to Tootah, wondering how he can recall the guy when his memory of yesterday’s hazing is almost a total blur, freshmen faces melting into each other, almost worse than the previous night with the mystery guy.
He guesses it’s from the trauma of waking up with a faceless body in his mind - the blur, but as the junior in front of him bends down to start his press-ups, Arthit feels a familiar sensation wash over him and he has to put the heel of his hand against his cock to stop it rising in his pants.
He quickly turns away.
Arthit’s told Tootah already that he only went out to get drunk and that meeting that man had been a happy accident. He’d been so nervous to start the hazing that he’d wanted to be blank and not remember every detail down to the exact way he was supposed to tilt his head when looking out on his freshies.
Instead, he has a blank face to search for and a feeling of fuzzy warmth in his stomach. Even though he doesn’t know who it was with, he knows they were careful with him and tried to make the sex as good as possible for him.
Muscle memories don’t lie after all!
The bar isn’t busy at seven pm, just a few guys hovering around the bar area and a couple of guys in shorts and tight tees hassling passers by to come inside for a drink.
When they spot Tootah, he is greeted like an old friend and is quickly swept into the space and to a prime table.
“You never come this early, Toot! What’s happening?”
Tootah indicates Arthit beside him and one of the guy’s swoops down to sit next to him, draping an arm over the back of his chair as he leans in and studies him up close.
“He’s a cutie, that’s for sure.”
Arthit laughs uncomfortably, and sensing this, the guy draws away, “Don’t worry, I don’t touch where I’m not wanted.”
“It’s okay.” Arthit says, self consciously as Tootah hugs the other guy who’s seated himself beside him across the table.
“So, Bee and Ant, here's the big question, were either of you working two nights ago?”
The guy next to Arthit shakes his head, but Tootah’s friend laughs and nods wildly, “Have you come about him?” He pouts at Arthit and then winks at him.
Arthit’s blush floods his whole face, ears tingling. “You remember me?”
“You don’t remember me?”
For a second Artht’s blood runs cold as he stares at him. Was it him? Is this the guy he..?
“Why do you remember him, Bee?” Tootah interrupts and Arthit leans in eagerly - half scared, half excited to see what he has to say.
“Oh, it wasn’t me he was draped all over.” Bee giggles, “It was TDH.”
“TDH?” Arthit repeats unsure.
“That’s what we’ve been calling him since he turned up here for the first time a few months ago.” Ant explains, “He’s tall, dark and handsome.. thus the nickname.”
“So, Arthit was friendly with TDH then?”
“Friendly? Friendlier.. more than friendly? Definitely. At one point I thought you two were going to get down to it right here in the bar! No that that hasn’t happened before, it’s sort of a regular thing around here to be fair.. you know yourself, Tootah! But then TDH seemed to come to his senses and whisked you away somewhere.. I’m guessing somewhere good from that blush on your face?” Bee winks again and Arthit ducks his head, embarrassed.
“So, you’d recognise him if you saw him again?” Tootah asks eagerly and Bee nods.
“We both would, he is one fine specimen of man! I’d drop my trousers for him any day!” Ant agrees and then stands abruptly, pulling Bee by the sleeve as another man approaches.
“Sorry boss, we’re headed back to work now.” They rush away, Ant shooting Tootah the universal signal for ‘call me’ as they do.
“Tootah? Are you disturbing my staff again?” The man leans over, hands resting on the table top as he stares between them.
“Aww, Khun Pearly, you know I’d never distract anyone while they’re working…”
“Tootah! You forget I’ve known you since you were a baby gay, too scared to approach anyone in here.”
Tootah blushes and Arthit grins as he looks up at Khun Pearly whose eyes flash in recognition. “Oh, it’s you!”
“Me?” Arthit points at himself uncertainly, and Pearly grins, showing rows of neat white teeth.
“Yes! The guy who ordered an entire bottle of rum and then proceeded to seduce TDH right at my bar. It was very impressive!”
Tootah’ eyes widen and he points at Arthit, “This guy? Seduced the man they all call tall, dark and handsome?”
“Hey!” Arthit protests weakly, but even he can see where Tootah might have a problem imagining that.
“Yeah, he was all over you, while you were all cute and standoffish! He had to work hard to get you to go home with him. You just kept saying, ‘We can jus’ do it right here!’ But the other guy was insistent that it would be better to leave.. And a good job you did, half my regulars looked like they were going to try join in on whatever show you were planning to put on. I had to bust some skulls that night!”
Tootah stares at Arthit, mouth dropping open, “Jeez! I can’t wait until all your memories come flooding back, Arthit! You’re going to turn into a human tomato!”
Arthit’s hand shoots across the table and connect with Tootah’s shoulder, “Shut it!”
“No, no, go on Tootah! What do you mean? You don’t remember anything?” He points at Arthit who drops his head into his hand, shame starting to creep in.
“He doesn’t. Unfortunately, that bottle you sold him got him so drunk he ended up doing the walk of shame in the early hours and can only remember that the sex was bloody good!”
“What, it’s true! And nothing old Pearly here hasn’t heard before? Right?”
“Less of the old Tootah, or I won’t tell you what I know.”
Arthit stares at the older man, eyes pleading with him, “Please?”
Khun Pearly slides into the seat next to Tootah and steeples his fingers, resting his chin on them as he gives Arthit a thorough once-over. “What do you remember?”
Arthit coughs, frowning hard as he thinks, then he decides to get it over with, “Just what he said - good sex.”
“So you don’t remember snogging him right over there?” He points at the bar and Arthit’s eyes trail over to it, a brief flash of a warm mouth and hands gripping his head.
Tootah pounces on him, “You remember something?”
“Maybe kissing him.”
“That’s good. What else Pearly?”
“Kissing and then you tried to open his shirt,” - nimble fingers fiddling with tiny, annoying buttons - “And he definitely had his hand down the back of your pants.”
Arthit groans, “I remember that! I had to smack his hands off my ass.”
“But you were the one he had to drag away when things got really heated!” Pearly laughs.
“Oh, Arthit! You man eater!”
Arthit bangs his head on the table, “But what’s his real name? And what course is he doing? And how do I find him?”
Pearly gives him a look that speaks volumes about his own experience and age, “Why do you want to? If it was a one night thing, then leave it be.”
“It was his -” Arthit leans over the table and slams his hand on Tootah’s mouth, but Pearly’s eyebrows have already risen and he is looking at Arthit with something akin to sympathy.
“I see. Well, I suppose you could wait it out here and see if he shows up tonight?”
“Does he usually?”
“Nah, I think he mostly comes on the weekends, but you can ask Ant and Bee if you like. Though, you’re not to hold them up from doing their actual job, please. A man has to make money after all.” Then he wais to them both and heads back behind the bar.
“Well, at least that’s something to start with, if he’s a regular here, then maybe we can come back a few times and you’ll find him through luck?”
Arthit frowns, he doesn’t really want to spend his nights in this little bar so far from the uni dorms. Sure, he’d come here that night to avoid being seen trying to hook up with a guy by any of his peers. But he can’t make a habit of it - he doesn’t have the time with all his uni work after all.
They leave after Ant and Bee confirm that TDH is usually here on a Friday and then head back to Arthit’s dorm.
On the way, Tootah starts to list all the guys he knows on campus who are actually out, showing Arthit picture after picture as they ride the songthaew home. But none of them sparks any kind of memory in him, so he shrugs it off and when he’s home, scratches his way through his pile of work, disappointment nudging at his heart.
He wishes he hadn’t gotten himself so drunk. But then, he would never have had the guts to approach the stranger and he’d still be a virgin waiting for some man to come along and make it thoroughly clear just how much he likes him.
That night, Arthit dreams.
He dreams of soft hands stroking his body. Dreams of a warm mouth and a sharp jaw that he nibbles. He dreams of spreading another man’s legs and licking his way into their centre, and of sheathing his aching cock and pushing into his intimate warmth.
When he wakes up it’s to sticky sheets, which hasn’t happened since he was a young teenager. Stripping his bed almost makes him late and he has to rush to his lesson, almost knocking over a familiar first year in his haste.
When a hand cups his elbow to steady him, he flashes back into his dream, remembering a large, warm hand like that wrapped around his cock as he was slowly taken apart.
He blushes and apologises and the freshman, who is achingly familiar, grins with a pink lipped mouth and the tip of a red tongue which has Arthit reeling away as more memories flood his mind.
He has to run to the bathroom before class, else he shows up with a bright red face and sweaty palms - the head hazer must maintain his image at all times, it’s written in the contract.
Kongpob is knocked out by the way Arthit studies him in the next hazing meeting. He can feel his curious eyes following his every movement as they complete dozens of exercises as punishment for something one of their batch did.
Kongpob hasn’t been listening, so he has no clue what’s going on, just follows the other’s like a lemming, all his thoughts taken up by P’Arthit who is looking rather flushed and worried about something.
Eventually, the exercises stop and Kongpob finds himself panting after his exertion, Oak rolling on the floor beside him before the hazers yell for them to sit up.
He does, and finds his eyes locked with his senior’s. The other man looks like he’s puzzling something out as Kong’s chest heaves up and down as he struggles to catch his breath.
Then Arthit’s eyes widen and he goes deathly pale.
The hazer next to him nudges him and Arthit’s attention moves away from Kongpob as he is led carefully from the room, his second in command taking his place.
Kongpob’s blood runs cold. Is the head hazer feeling ill? Or.. Has he figured out that it was him?
Outside, Tootah settles Arthit on the stairs leading to the upper floors and dashes to the vending machine, returning with an ice cold drink that he thrusts into his friend’s hand.
“What happened? You look like you saw a ghost?”
Arthit’s heart beat is thumping in his ears and his throat feels tight. He glugs down a mouthful of coke and then rests his shaking hands on his thighs.
“It’s him. That freshman is the one I..”
Tootah gasps as he eases himself to sit beside him, arm coming to wrap around his shoulders, “Are you sure?”
“Yeah. Yeah. It’s him. I remember it all.”
Then Arthit buries his face in Tootah’s shoulder and starts to cry, body shaking as his friend strokes his back carefully. “It’s okay, Thit. It’ll be okay.”
Back in his room, alone now, Arthit wonders how he could have been so careless.
Getting drunk - fine. But doing it with his closest friends is much, much safer.
Going out to look for someone to kiss - okay. But he should have stayed sober so he’d at least have remembered who it was.
Having sex with someone he picked up in a bar while pissed? Not Okay.
Rationally, he knows all these things. But his irrational heart had spoken when he’d finally felt ready to follow Tootah’s advice and share his sexuality with someone.
He imagines now, that Tootah had meant Knott or Prem or his mother or something. Not a random stranger who he had picked up in a bar while two sheets to the wind.
He remembers it now. Almost all of it. Not just the incredible sex - the rest too, how it had happened, the push and pull between them and the look on Kongpob’s face. He knows the freshman’s name now - had found it in the paperwork he keeps on his desk with details of the entire batch of students. It was comforting to put the name to the face he recalls looming closer as he’d pulled the younger man in for his first ever kiss.
And what an incredible kiss it had been! Even there in the bar with everyone watching, Arthit had felt like a prince in some fairy tale as Kongpob had pulled him closer, pausing right before their lips actually touched to check that it was okay.
And Arthit had laughed, actually laughed about it, as he dragged the man in and attached their lips.
His memory is still slightly hazy, but he knows it was good, just like every other part of their thoroughly intimate time together.
He’s just angry at himself that of all the people he could have chosen to have his first ever sexual experience with, he’s chosen one of his own juniors who he now had to haze for the rest of the semester.
And he’ll have to keep it secret of course. No spilling it out to Knott or Prem or bloody Bright while he’s drunk, no accidentally watching Kongpob all the time and marvelling over the tightness of his glutes as he squats. And certainly, no outing himself on campus in any way shape or form in front of his freshmen.
Arthit’s desires will have to be squashed down and kept there by an imaginary boulder until the day he hands over the gears and the batch graduate from his hazing.
He has to.
Except Kongpob isn’t going to let him.
Seeing the way Arthit’s eyes had widened as he stared at him in horror, Kongpob knows that his senior has figured it out.
And there’s no way he’s going to ignore that.
Firstly, he doesn’t want Arthit to think he’s embarrassed that they were together, that they had a mind blowing, an out of body, so good I can’t stop dreaming about it, shag!
Next, he isn’t interested in keeping the fact he knows about it a secret. He wants Arthit to know. He wants Arthit to acknowledge how good they were together.
And mostly? He really wants Arthit in his bed again.
Sure, Kongpob has been hopping around the clubs and taking a stray man or two home with him for some consensual fun, but he hasn’t ever had it as good as it was with Arthit.
And he wants more of his senior if he’s interested.
And preferably? He wants it as soon as possible.
It’s easy to work out where Arthit lives, it’s right across from his room after all. And he makes his way there as soon as he’s showered and dressed in fresh clothes after the insane hazing session earlier.
His quads and his glutes are in pain as he ascends the stairs to the third floor, but he’s so eager he can’t be bothered waiting for the elevator.
Once he’s in front of Arthit’s room, he takes a deep breath and knocks sharply.
There’s a wait of about eight seconds - Kongpob counts - and then the door is pulled open and Kongpob is staring at the glorious sight of his senior, pulling a tee-shirt over his head.
His words are muffled as he speaks, “Sorry Tootah, I’m just not up for it tonight, can we go another time?”
“Oh, but I could be up for it, Phi!” Kong says, smirking as Arthit’s face pops out of the neck of his shirt and immediately turns crimson.
‘Wha- What are you doing here?”
Arthit is clearly shocked to see him, but his eyes relay the truth to Kongpob as they travel the length of him, sparkling to show that Arthit likes what he sees.
Kong’s wearing his tightest pair of shorts - the ones that leave little to the imagination - and has tucked his old school shirt into them, belt buckle displayed prominently, the word GAY in shiny metal, clear for Arthit to read.
“Phi? I have a question about the assignment from today, please may I come in?”
Arthit leans out of his door, shoulder brushing Kong’s and making him shiver deliciously. When it’s clear no-one can see them, he grabs Kong’s wrist and drags him inside, dropping it the second his door snickers shut and marching over to his window to drag his curtains closed.
“What are you doing here?” He repeats his earlier question, but this time he sounds a little menacing and Kongpob smirks as he remembers the way Arthit had ordered him to suck his cock. If his senior is in the mood, Kongpob is definitely up for it too, especially if he’s going to order him around like that.
“I told you, I have a question. But honestly,” Kongpob licks his lips and gives Arthit a long once-over, taking in the loose shorts and dark blue band shirt, eyes lingering on his bare feet that remind him of their eager stripping three night’s prior, “It’s not about the assignment.”
Arthit’s head bobs and then he turns to his desk, shuffling through his paperwork to find his hazers contract. He finds the part he’s highlighted and pretty much memorised, and then starts to read it aloud.
“No hazing team member may fraternize with a first year when they are in the process of hazing them. This rule must be strictly followed to ensure fair treatment of all students.”
Kongpob’s grin slides off his face as Arthit’s eyes lift to look straight at him. He’s not certain what the look means, but he decides to go for it anyway.
“So, you know? That it was me?” Arthit inclines his head and Kongpob continues, “I figured it out, when we were in the first hazing session, the way you spoke to me.”
Kongpob takes a step deeper into Arthit’s room and the other man holds up a hand, silently.
“Don’t worry, I’m not coming near you… unless you ask me to, of course.” Again, Arthit’s eyes change, again Kongpob isn’t sure about the message.
“I just wanted to make sure you.. felt that everything between us.. that it was consensual? Because I remember everything now and I don’t think I did anything wrong.”
“You didn’t.” Arthit’s voice comes out deeper than before and Kongpob knows he’s feeling a little of what he is - nervous, afraid, aroused. “It was consensual on my part.”
“Oh. That’s good. That’s really good. I was worried you didn’t remember.” Kongpob twists and rests so his shoulders are against Arthit’s wall, his hips thrust a little forward as he gets comfortable.
Arthit’s eyes follow the movement and Kongpob might tense his abs a little, on purpose, so the tee shirt stretches more, putting him firmly on display to the man he fancies.
“I remember too, now. It was just today.. I only realised it was you.”
“Yeah, there were images and thoughts and feelings.. but I didn’t know it was you.”
“And.. Now you do?” Kongpob knows he sounds eager, but he doesn’t care. Truly, Arthit is gorgeous and sexy and a really good fuck and he would quite like to spend time with him and get to know him and maybe, end up back in bed with him as soon as possible.
Arthit holds out the papers in his hand and starts to repeat himself, “No hazing team member..”
“I know. I heard you the first time!” Kongpob cuts him off, aware of what Arthit is saying, but not willing to have it be Arthit’s answer to his question. He pushes himself away from the wall and crosses the room until he’s only a few feet from his senior, the scent of his recently shampooed hair lingering between them.
“I want to know.. what do you think about what we did.. now you know it was with me?”
Arthit gives him a long look, “And I explained that I can’t have any thoughts about it because I’m the damn.. head.. hazer!”
Kongpob hears the frustration and feels the distress from Arthit and does what comes naturally to him. He opens his arms and offers them to Arthit.
For a beat, nothing happens. And then Arthit makes a kind of strangled gasp and falls against him.
They stand there, hugging, for long enough that there’s a knock on Arthit’s door and Tootah yells through that he’s here.
Against Kongpob’s shoulder, Arthit calls out a muffled, “Not tonight.” And Tootah yells back and then his footsteps fade away and Kongpob and Arthit are still hugging.
Eventually, Kongpob ends up letting him go, sitting himself in P’Arthit’s desk chair, Arthit perched on the bed in front of him. Every time Kongpob moves, their knees knock together, so he does it a lot, relishing the chance to touch him.
“P’Arthit? I know it wasn’t the ideal way to meet you - drunk in a bar - but I’m glad I did.”
“But, you’re my junior. Part of my hazing batch, I shouldn’t even have you here in my room.”
“I wasn’t that night!” Kongpob knows he’s grasping at straws, can tell from Arthit’s expression that there’s little chance he’ll change his mind, but he tries anyway, “Then we were just two strangers. My freshman year didn’t even start until five hours after you snuck out of my bed and ran away.”
“I didn’t run away, I was still drunk and overcome..”
“With what? With my enormous cock and sexy ass?”
“Kongpob! No! Because it was my..” Arthit groans and Kongpob stares at him in surprise.
“You weren’t going to finish that with.. ‘first time’ were you Phi?”
Arthit’s eyes widen and Kongpob knows he’s hit on the truth.
He slides off the desk chair and onto the bed, arm automatically wrapping around Arthit and drawing him in, lips finding his forehead and leaving a lingering kiss.
“I’m so sorry, I never would have.. if I’d known..” he feels mortified, but Arthit shoves him away and gives him a fierce, hazer look.
“It’s fine. I went out to meet someone. I.. just.. met you.”
“And I’m glad you did, Phi. I like to think that even though we were both pissed, I showed you how good it can be? With a man?”
Arthit’s cheeks redden and he mumbles, “Yes. It was good, Kongpob.”
Kongpob gives him a bright smile, “Phew! I’m glad. Everyone’s first time should be at least a bit good. Usually it’s awkward too, but I don’t remember any of that - i think we fit together pretty well right?”
“Don’t talk about it! I can’t. I can’t talk about it.”
“Why? You were fine with sticking your cock in my ass and down my throat. I distinctly remember you trying to choke yourself on mine and I know I didn’t dream your sucking at my ass hole? So, why can’t we talk about it?”
Arthit’s eyes are as big as a pair of saucers, “Kongpob?” He asks in wonder, “How can you just..” he twirls one hand around in the air.
“How can I talk about what we did in bed?” Arthit nods, “Because I’m old enough to have sex. If I can have sex, I should be able to talk about what that means, right?”
“Come on Phi, it was fucking fantastic! I wanked over my memories of it last night, it was so freaking good. It’s never been like that with anyone else.”
Arthit gives him a shrewd look, “You’re just saying that cos I’m here with you.”
“As if! If you had been bad, I would have told you when we were doing it, do you remember me asking you to change anything you were doing?”
“You told me to go harder.” Arthit admits in a small voice, shoulders hunched.
“Yeah,” Kongpob grins at the memory, “That was right before I came! Man, that was incredible sex!”
“It was my first time ever, I have nothing to compare it to.”
“Seriously, I wouldn’t lie about it.”
“I thought you meant I was your first man! You mean, I was your first time ever?”
“Yeah. But it’s no big deal. Seriously.”
“We’ll have to agree to disagree there, Phi, for me sex, and especially your first time, is a big deal. Look, does anyone know you like men?”
Arthit gives him an indecipherable look, “Just Tootah. He’s the only one I’ve ever told. Oh, and you, I guess.”
“Yeah, you definitely told me, Arthit! Don’t you remember? You yelled it out across the bar!”
Arthit drops his face into his hands, “Don’t remind me, please!”
Kongpob prises Arthit’s head up and gives him a serious look, “P’Arthit, I came here because I want you to know.. even though it was only that one time.. you were seriously the best sex I’ve ever had. And, you have invaded my mind and I want to be with you. Like in a relationship?”
“We could! It could be.. a secret? Just between us?”
“I can’t, Kongpob,” Arthit looks straight at him, eyes pleading, “If we got found out.. you heard what the contract says?” Arthit looks like he desperately wants to ignore exactly what the contract states, but his training won’t let him. “I can’t risk it. Not now.”
Kongpob jumps on his words, “Then, Later? Later we could…? After I get my gear?”
“But you’re a freshman and I know what those guys said at the bar - you like to pick up men and you enjoy sex. I don’t want you to.. I don’t know.. put your sex life on hold or.. whatever, not for me!”
Arthit turns away and Kongpob can’t help himself, reaching out to slide his fingers through slightly thicker ones, “What if I want to wait?”
Twisting back, Arthit gives him a look that says he’s ridiculous, “You’re ridiculous!”
“No. I’m.. well, actually, I think.. please don’t run away?”
“I’m sort of.. in love?”
“Kongpob!” Arthit sounds furious, but the way he tightens his hold on Kongpob’s fingers, says otherwise. “You can’t mean it.”
“I’ve truly never felt this way, Phi. I feel so.. connected to you. Like I could spend every second with you and it still wouldn’t be enough. I don’t know if you know what I mean.”
Arthit shakes his head and then says the complete opposite, “Yeah, it’s ridiculous, and stupid and impossible, but I kind of.. think I do.”
They share a look. Then Kongpob leans in, closer, “One kiss? Then I won’t bother you again - not until I get my gear.”
Lips that he remembers, soft against his own. The warmth of an open mouth as a tongue caresses his. Hands gripping his shoulders, a warm body pressing him into the mattress.
It’s been almost three months since their mouths touched this way. Almost three months of watching and pining from afar.
Finally, in this hotel room by the beach, Arthit and Kongpob become lovers once more, and this time, they both remember.