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Al Rigore Di Tempo

Summary:

After everything that happened in the last years, all Shinichi really wishes for is to live a quiet, autonomous life. It's a simple wish, a modest outlook in a world where everyone is hoping for so much more. It's just as unattainable, it turns out.

Notes:

Hi,
thanks for stopping by. This is my first multi-chaptered work that I completed, so this is sort of a journey into the unknown. I hope you like the story and decide to stick with it. I plan to update once a week.
This is an alternate universe, which I was introduced to by Phantoms_Echo, among others, but I want to say thanks to them in particular for getting the idea stuck in my head. I kind of took it and ran with it, though, so I hope this won't end up too confusing. If so, let me know and I'll try to clarify it somehow.
I don't own any of these characters, and this was written purely for my own amusement.

Chapter 1: Grave

Chapter Text

The secret to independence is a solid, unwavering grounding in reality. No matter your background, no matter your identity, no matter your convictions, as long as you remain firmly rooted in the present, you cannot go wrong.

Shinichi's mind is strumming, a steady rhythm with a quick staccato of taps running through it like someone is drumming a flamenco beat into his very soul. The strange nervousness feels oddly incongruous with his focused concentration. His bespectacled eyes are roaming, skimming over the evidence at the scene, while his other senses are stretched towards the suspects. Hattori next to him has narrowed his sight to the countless shards of ceramic that litter the floor of the small studio the victim used for his clay and china work.

The drawings are clear and tasteful. They are the very opposite of that playful type of western designs which are interlaced with flowers and cheery patterns, famous all through the world. Instead, the man stuck to straight lines and small ornaments, never too detailed, always rather an understatement. They would look good in a high-class modern restaurant, Shinichi thinks, one of those sleek, nearly sterile kind of places, because the china is just like that: beautiful, but with a haughty air to it, failing to feel warm and inviting.

The man that is buried beneath his creations couldn't look more different from them, his scruffy beard and tousled hair bordering on unkempt. His skin is clean, however, and his clothes underneath the apron are of high quality. The witnesses' testimony, as far as his character is concerned, do depict him as incredibly meticulous where his work is concerned, and, according to his girlfriend, somewhat easy to get lost in it, forgetting everything else over it once he got going.

"Meeting every single Sentinel-cliche there is. Doesn't even take my genius to see that," Mouri gloated when she told them, and Shinichi still winces at the memory. All the more because he can easily tell that the victim was a Guide.

For starters, his girlfriend is a Sentinel―albeit a latent one―and, while by no means there aren't any Sentinel-Sentinel pairings around, statistically speaking Guide-Sentinel pairings are much more common. But mostly it's the scene that gives it away: the killer snuck up on the victim from behind, judging by the position of the only door in a studio that is lit by recessed ceiling lights. Also, there is the fact that the pottery wheel, situated near the opposite wall, holds a half-molded piece.

The estimated time of death is around five in the afternoon, and the wall with the pottery wheel faces west. There would have been no shadow falling onto him, and over the sound of the radio and the spinning table, he wouldn't have heard someone approaching, provided, of course, that he wasn't a Sentinel. Any Sentinel would have picked up on the sound of someone moving across these noisy floorboards, except for when they were deeply submerged in a zone. But no Sentinel zoning like that would be able to still work the clay so diligently.

So Shinichi is left with a potential Neutral or a Guide of uncertain prowess. It's not like people are forced to go to a Sentinel-Guide-Center to register anymore, so the fact that the victim doesn't have an ID from one on him isn't an indicator of the former.

What makes Shinichi certain is the broken china on the floor. The shards are everywhere, although the body of the victim doesn't reveal traces of a fight. Even Hattori's careful scanning couldn't find a single scratch on him, apart from the head injury and the marks from where he fell. The man died instantaneously, hit from behind with a large vase he kept in the corner. The fragments of it are scattered on top of those of the victim's china.

So the shards have to have been there before, which means that, in all likelihood, the victim got them there by destroying his own work. Afterwards, he must have just started to work amid the chaos.

According to his girlfriend, he left their shared apartment at four. The drive to the studio should have taken at least twenty-five to thirty minutes, taking rush-hour traffic into consideration. In order to get this far on a fresh piece he must have been working on it for another thirty minutes minimum according to one of the victim's pottery friends. That left him approximately five to ten minutes for the extend of destruction on display.

Psychologically speaking, there is one major difference between Guides and Neutrals, and that is the ability of reading and dealing with emotions, those of strangers and one's own alike. In general, the sensitivity of a Guide is much higher, so from an early age, they are dealing with a barrage of feelings. While that seems to suggest them to be very likely overwhelmed by emotions, in practice, the opposite is true.

A general mood or sentiment seems to prevail a long time in many Neutrals; Guides, however, are able to block out any temper in a matter of seconds. Their shields can close in around them in the blink of an eye, making them often seem unapproachable, even callous, when one doesn't recognize the action as the defense mechanism it is. The ability to emotionally resonate well with others can be a curse, so every Guide almost automatically learns how to keep out any unwanted intrusion into their psyche.

As Shinichi is well aware, that does include one's own sentiments, as well. The likeliest scenario in this case would be that, after the victim was overcome by a bout of unbearable, explosive anger, the man immediately retreated behind his defenses. He probably aided the process along by starting his work, which consisted of a set of well-practiced motions he could do on autopilot, centering him and distracting him from the turmoil he felt and spread to his surroundings.

Shinichi's mind is still strumming, but the melody has changed, feeling much more like the one he prefers to set for himself. The soft, sustained Air is steadily floating on in a back and forth between ups and downs, sometimes lifting, sometimes sinking, always oscillating around a steady state. The flamenco fades out, like the sound of a retreating plane in the distance.

It's easy to let the feelings of the suspects wash through his mental calm. There is anxiety; every single one of them is scared, no matter how much they try to hide it behind fake anger or nonchalance.

The pottery friend, underneath the nerves, feels shocked and confused. He is unable to grasp what has happened, not yet in the beginnings of grief, even though Shinichi can see that he and his friend were close. They shared the taste in clothes as well as in art, that much is revealed by the still intact pieces the friend made standing proudly on the shelf second to the top. They are up high enough to be safe, but not too high to be difficult to reach, the best position in the atelier, clearly honored more than the victim's own work.

The girlfriend is on the verge of a zone, in spite of her weak abilities. She can't take her eyes off the piece on the pottery wheel, blood-sprinkled and drooping. She doesn't feel shock, clearly quicker on the uptake; she only feels pain. The depth of her grief reminds Shinichi of Ran. It speaks of a love equally as warm, an emotion strong enough to turn volatile. She might become a murderer for it, he thinks, because any sentiment that forceful can become lighter fuel, waiting for but a spark.

The sister, though, the last person in his habitual three-suspects-lineup, is just weary. She feels tired. She feels empty. She feels lost. Her sentiments are like silk threats, weaving easily through Shinichi's subtle mental grasp, getting lost in the sensory overload she feels from the reflection of the light hitting the delicate shards of porcelain. Out of the three of them, she is the easiest to place with regards to her status: a Sentinel with strong visual abilities. Her eyes are glued to one fragment in particular, showing a stylized version of a snowdrop in thin, fickle lines, drawn with a steady, loving hand.

Her name is Haru, spelled like flower.

Shinichi turns away from her and addresses the girlfriend. "Onee-san, how long have you been with your boyfriend?"

"A little over a year," she replies, her otherwise clear soprano scratchy and choked with withheld tears.

"Has he come here often for pottery making?" Shinichi asks.

It's the friend who answers. "Not quite as much, actually. Most of his work was from before he moved in with Akane-san."

Shinichi detects no bitterness in him when he says it, and the use of her first name reveals a certain degree of closeness between the victim's girlfriend and best friend. It actually indicates harmony instead of brooding conflict.

"Joji-san always said how strange it felt to visit Rin at home," the girlfriend says, and her face twists between a smile and a sob.

None of the others go to comfort her, the friend too insecure about his place, the sister still lost in the ruined pottery on the ground. Shinichi turns as Ran comes to aid, resolutely pulling the grieving woman into a comforting hug. She is a good Guide, clear and concise in how she deals with sadness, unwilling to see it being bottled up. Impeccably polite in any other situation, she is willing to forego proper etiquette in moments like these to be there for someone. Shinichi has yet to see her be rejected.

He walks across the floorboards towards Hattori, carefully avoiding the shards. They creak loudly, making him feel like he is going to crash through them. He revisits his idea about only a Sentinel being able to hear someone move through the room above the background noise. A nearly deaf person would have picked up on it.

"Those floorboards are awful," the friend mutters, probably more to distract himself from everything else than to actually make conversation.

"You probably already figured out the best way to cross them, didn't you, Onii-san?" Shinichi asks, testing another hypothesis.

The other nods. "We all did, I think. It's impossible to take now, though. It's covered in fragments of his china."

Shinichi's eyes meet Hattori's. The other detective nods almost imperceptibly, his sharper senses having already noticed some places where the shatters have been ground to something even finer, almost dust. The culprit must have approached across the shards.

Shinichi checks his watch. They have been here for nearly an hour, and it's just fifteen minutes to seven. His luck being what it is, they stumbled across the body looking for tools. Hattori is moving into this apartment complex for his studies, and Ran and Shinichi, dragging Mouri along with them, agreed to help him with the boxes and setting up furniture. That, however, proved difficult when missing the correct bit for most screws, so they decided to ask the neighbors for help.

Consequently, they discovered a body way ahead of the time anyone might have figured it likely to be found, as always. The girlfriend arrived by chance just when they waited in front of the atelier. She actually opened the door for them when they didn't receive an answer to ringing the bell and was with them during the discovery, making her an obvious suspect. She was the one who told them about the other two, because, as even Mouri realized, the door was locked and undamaged, leaving only those with a key as possible suspects. Hence, the list includes the three people in the room, all of whom showed up within fifteen minutes of the girlfriend calling. That in itself is curious, since none of them lives close by.

Shinichi and Hattori share another look. They don't do it often, but situations like these call for them to let their senses intertwine for a brief moment. Bonding theory says that the probability for a coupling of a Sentinel and a Guide increases with direct contact between their minds. And while that is true, Shinichi knows it to be irrelevant due to two simple reasons: compatibility and readiness to bond.

Neither of them are an issue between Hattori and him, both of them happier as friends. Besides, one of them is only willing to bond with a certain hot-blooded childhood friend of his, and the other is unwilling to form such a connection in general, since he has only ever been interested in a fellow Guide. A Guide, who, unfortunately though, has recently bonded with another Sentinel. Aside from that, the compatibility between him and Hattori is abysmal. Even the short contact with Hattori's aggressive, overly energetic and chaotic mindscape leaves him longing for the neat structure of his own, while he can feel Hattori fighting the restraints Shinichi's rigid order forces him into.

Still, the images they manage to transmit, of traces of blood, skin, and fabric on the maimed shards that Hattori found, and the sentiments and relationships Shinichi sorted out, slot together into a crystal clear picture.

They don't need to discuss the further course of action. It is Shinichi, who approaches the sister of the victim, touching a hand to the back of hers and pulling up his shields without warning. The zone she has been in breaks abruptly, her eyes snapping to him, and her mind is flooded with rage, grief, and despair. All of it is sprinkled with a righteousness that leaves no room for regret. He doesn't need to see her feet. He knows her socks will be bloodied, ingrained with remnants of china that could only have gotten there as she stole herself towards her unsuspecting brother, carrying a heavy vase silently as only a furious Sentinel can.

"How long has he been acting as your Guide?" Shinichi asks her, just as Division One, Inspector Megure in the lead, push through the doors in order to put her in handcuffs.

"Since he was eleven and I was fourteen," she says.

Everybody else in the room apart from Hattori gasps in shock. While Sentinel-Guide relationships are accepted broadly and with complete disregard to gender, such pairs among siblings remain a taboo. Even if they are platonic, a Sentinel especially often can't bear to share a Guide once they intend to enter a relationship with someone else.

"He broke it off when he met her. Told me we couldn't keep doing it, even though we knew it grounded us. Kept us functioning. None of us can be without the other. Look at his art. It vanished once he shut me out. And he knew it. We've gone back and forth, last year. Trying and failing to sever the bond. But today, he..."

Today the bond snapped, Shinichi realizes, and a sick feeling overcomes him as he recognizes the fatigue she feels as a dangling bond, already bled dry. They probably never received training, seeing as none of them is registered. It suddenly becomes clear to him that what the brother did to his sister is as cruel as what she did to him.

"I already went past the initial shock," she whispers, eyes still on Shinichi, even as they glaze over, "I can feel the zones looming. They'll come to freeze me to death. My parents always said they named us wrong, you know? Rin, written as ice, and Haru, written like flower but meaning spring. They said he was so much warmer than me. What a joke. Can you feel it, little boy? How cold he is?"

There it is again, the despair, and Shinichi feels his carefully constructed shields around her breaking, not tethered strongly enough to her to keep her safe, to protect her sanity. If a Sentinel bonds before they learn to control their senses, once they come to rely on someone to keep them anchored to reality, they can't do it on their own anymore. Despite all progress in research, such a broken bond is still a death sentence to many of them.

As she is being led away, she succumbs to her senses again, moving like a puppet on cut strings, unseeing and unfeeling. Her eyes look as blank as the cold white china, the patterns of the broken flowers and delicate lines losing their shine as the sun sets and the lights are switched off.



***



When they leave the rubble that remains of that forbidden bond only Mouri's mind remains unchanged, still focused on his craving for a beer. Hattori's emotions twist and turn like a storm brewing, his senses itchy from overuse, his thoughts probably dark and upset, still figuring out at whom he ought to be more mad. Ran's are a swelling ocean of grief, tainted by the feelings of the bereft girlfriend she consoled and her own compassion for the tragic end of the siblings. She is always sympathetic, even if the concerned party committed a crime. Shinichi's heart aches for her.

"Maybe you should go and visit Araide-sensei tonight, Ran-neechan," he says once they took leave from Hattori and made their way to the entrance of his building. She smiles down at him through unshed tears. Araide's gentle mind that sees so much beauty in the world always manages to clear the deep waters of her sorrow and gets them to sparkle in the sunlight. She doesn't deserve any less than that.

"I think I really should," she says. "Will the two of you be okay?"

"Sure, Ran-neechan," Shinichi replies and forces a smile of his own.

They separate at the subway station. Shinichi is trudging behind Mouri listlessly, mulling over unhappy thoughts as the soft tune in his head turns more and more morose, a requiem's heaviness replacing the Air's soaring lightness. Suddenly, the speed picks up. It's the second time today he feels this disconnect between his sentiments and the sounds in his mind, and this time, not distracted by a case, he realizes what it is: a resonance.

Shinichi has never lived through one before. He has heard of it, though. A resonance is the alignment of the mental barriers between a Sentinel and a Guide. Each Sentinel and Guide has their own way to protect their mind, their sanity, from the constant influx of either sensations or emotions surrounding them. If that barrier is similar enough, if they suit each other, it's possible for their shields to coalesce without a bond in place. What Shinichi is listening to now is the sound of someone else's mind. He stops dead, eyes widening in shock, as the truth sinks in.

The only surefire ways to bond with a Sentinel are repeated, close contact, a willingness to form the connection, and compatibility. And while the first two are more or less in his own hands, the last one decidedly is not. Given that he is standing on a near empty street next to a Neutral and is just as unwilling to bond as ever, it is, however, the only remaining explanation for a resonance that clear.

"Fuck," Shinichi mutters, as the rhythm of both, him and the unknown intruder, screech to a sudden halt.

Chapter 2: Andante

Notes:

Hi,
thank you to everyone who read, kudosed or commented on the last chapter. I really hope you are enjoying the story and that you'll like the next chapter. This is in Kaito's POV. And a warning again, the pacing is going to be somewhat slow in the beginning. I hope you don't mind. If you do, though, let me know. As the story is already written, I might be able to work on the schedule, at least for now.

Chapter Text

In Kaito's opinion, it's all about timing. There is no reason why he shouldn't be able to finally enjoy his first date with Aoko while slyly evading the wrath of Akako for ignoring her latest warnings about ravens, ditching the prying eye of Hakuba and his usual, rather justified suspicions, and simultaneously scanning the layout of the newly opened Ekoda Art center for future reference. He doesn't intend to break into it just yet, but the information still might come in handy, and he will never have such a good excuse for being there as he has right now. Aoko has been pestering him about wanting to go for days on end. Hakuba has been properly disgruntled all week, when he realized he couldn't dissuade her from taking Kaito to an art exhibition.

Kaito's index finger has been tapping a quick drum pattern into his thigh all the way here, hands buried deeply into his pockets to ward off the cold of late fall. His senses keep flickering to life, switching from one to the next. Vision, hearing, and smell are ramping up at separate intervals, while he keeps his sense of touch steadily focused on the feeling of the beat his finger presses into his flesh.

When his father and mother found out that he was a Sentinel, they didn't send him to the center to register. Instead, they taught him how to handle his senses and find his equilibrium by himself. They told him to keep it a secret, showed him how to conceal his abilities.

"You can never rely on others to pull you back," his father said, his mother standing silently by his side, soft brushes of her sensitive mind caressing Kaito.

They laid themselves over the panic bubbling in his heart like a blanket. She helped him calm his emotions, but never reigned in his senses, leaving him to catch himself on the very precipice of a zone. He managed every time, until he found the underlying tact his body worked with and no longer needed her steadying hands to walk alone.

The excitement of the day has kept Kaito humming all the way to the museum. He can barely restrain himself from bouncing through the doors of the venue when he arrives, too thrilled to finally get to go on a real date with Aoko after all the times it was but a half-acknowledged thing between them. His good mood is further enhanced because he has a delightful surprise prepared for inspector Nakamori later that night.

He is almost cackling with glee, thinking about the way his next heist will be announced. It's just his luck that the police force decided to have a celebration after a break in a big case which involved a syndicate or some such precisely two weeks from the arrival of 'Madame Blanche' in Tokyo. He has wanted to get a look at that diamond for ages, but the former proprietor has kept it under wraps. The lady who inherited it obviously has neither the qualms nor the common sense of her grandfather and almost immediately agreed when Suzuki Jiroukichi asked her to lend it to him for a public display, naturally involving all the splendor his family thought necessary for such an occasion.

Kaito has gone out of his way to get a thoughtful, dedicated present for inspector Nakamori, consisting in part, but not exclusively, of indoor fireworks. He is convinced the complementary life-sized poster will convey the heist message properly without subtracting from the festive atmosphere of the victory celebration the police does indeed deserve. He only regrets that he will not personally be able to witness the shock and rage on Nakamori's face as it goes off.

Aoko looks pretty when he finally discovers her among the crowd, waiting by the reception. The Salsa he has been tapping along to shifts, picking up speed and passion as the music's origin slides eastwards and his heart is beating a Flamenco rhythm into his chest so quick it's almost overwhelming. He is slipping just a bit, his tight defenses cracking just so, only to be reigned back in by a short, calm, floating interlude of a different kind of song. It's the Air.

Kaito knows this piece which is greeting him like an old friend, familiar like the face of the girl he has circled around for years. It's somewhat more heavy and centered than the previous shield he built around his mind, his previous rhythm. It reminds him of all the ways nothing is ever going to change between Aoko and him. The music dips and soars but it feels like it will never come to rest, never arrive. There is a melancholy to the realization that effortlessly settles him back into his original beat, centers and clears his mind as he smiles at her warmly.

"Bakaito! You're late!" she gripes.

He just laughs it off and takes her hand to pull her into the exhibition.

They have a good time. There is no one bothering them for once; nothing unforeseen happens, and Kaito has his casing done in a matter of minutes, scoffing only slightly at the lax security measures. Otherwise, he enjoys his time to the fullest. There are pictures here, mostly photographs from all over the world, incredibly vivid even in their stillness. Kaito's focus is arrested by the piercing eyes of a little girl amid the rubble of a crumbled house. Those eyes feel like they are looking into his very soul, and Kaito can't help but think he has borne that kind of gaze before. Aoko is fascinated by intricate sculptures, tall and slender, made from brass. The plaque beneath the statue proclaims its origin to be in Tuscany.

"They call it 'Ombra della sera'," she reads.

"Shadow of the evening," Kaito hums, looking at the long-stretched limbs, "it's plain to see what they meant."

He thinks of the sculpture when their afternoon together slips into the evening seamlessly. Their own shadows are cast into sharp relief against the remnants of fallen leaves on the ground as they make their way through the city. Kaito wonders why the comically disproportionate shapes appear so looming to him. It's only when they are sitting opposite each other at the dining table in the corner of a small restaurant and he looks at Aoko for a long time that he notices there is something going on.

"I have something to tell you," she says, when she catches his gaze.

Her bright blue eyes look heavy, and her hands twitch around the chopsticks. He can hear her accelerated heartbeat and registers the shaking fingers and her uneven breath. He stills his incessant drumming on the table.

"What is it? Did you mess up that sports test you had at the police academy last week?" he asks her, trying for a joke to dispel the heaviness settling in his gut.

She just shoots him a withering glare before squaring her shoulders and saying, "My results from the center came back. I'm a latent Sentinel. They expect my abilities to manifest late. If I want to go on with my training, I'll probably have to be paired with a Guide when they do."

It's pure irony that this is the precise moment his fireworks go off a few blocks away. He wonders whose face looks more stunned now, his or Nakamori's.

"I thought you were a Neutral," he whispers.

"So did I," she replies, her voice low and choked, and it just hurts, seeing her this dejected.

Kaito hasn't expected that. He has been granted one perfect day, only to have it ripped away from him like a band-aid from a gaping wound, leaving him open and bleeding. He does the only thing he can think of: letting the shutters of his poker face fall over his features. His mind conjures up the simple common time of a dark, melodic ballad he has discovered some days before. It's somewhat less rhythmical, way slower than what he usually chooses as a barrier, dark guitar tunes and a strained voice telling a story about loss and farewells, rendering him drained and stone-cold. It tethers him to the disappointing reality he is confronted with, leaving no room for doubt. There is nothing to be done but accept the facts for what they are. Aoko wants to join the police force. There is no holding her back. And he can't change who or what he is.

"I should go," he says with a smile as fake as the nails of the lady one table further.

The clanking noises of the plates and glasses are quickly becoming too much. The dim lighting is turning blinding, and Kaito knows he has to get out of here as the beat inside starts to pick up speed. If it gets too fast, he won't be able to keep himself grounded.

It's said that some Sentinels are able to deal with the onslaught of senses without a Guide, provided their abilities don't manifest beyond latent. Anything above a slight elevation of one sense is thought to become overpowering after a couple of years for many. The minority of Sentinels nowadays attempts to master the control of their perception since it's a tedious process that requires a delicate focus and a lot of time. It has taken Kaito years, and he wouldn't have managed without his mother to support him. His abilities manifested at seven, with all of his senses being strongly enhanced. He has not had the help of any Guide since he turned eleven.

But now his carefully constructed walls are coming down around him. In their wake, a bitter realization rushes in. One of his goals for the hard work he put into balancing his senses on his own has long been to achieve a future with Aoko. That will be out of reach forever.

Irrational fury bubbles up inside of him, at how Aoko, who never dealt with any of the challenges he did, just wants to throw away her independence. He knows that she doesn't get to choose; the protocol at the police is quite strict with regards to unbound Sentinels ever since the scandal with the Sene medication. Still, his hopes to be with her eventually are being squashed, leaving him with nothing but sand running through his fingers like their time together, inevitably going to be depleted sooner rather than later.

Logically, he knows that he should be congratulating her on her abilities. In spite of that, his heart is starting to crack.

"Kaito," she says, and she is pleading with him, her eyes brimming with tears and her hand reaching for his.

He snatches it back a little too fast as he pushes his chair back and flings a couple of bills next to his plate, his movements so quick that she doesn't even notice.

"I'm sorry, I remembered there's something I need to do. But I'm happy for you, I am. You'll make a great officer as a Sentinel. I just hope you find a really good Guide for yourself. Aren't you happy?" he asks her, forcing the anger back, letting his mind claw through the layers of rage and despair, just so he can somehow hide them all away behind the mask that is immovable on his face.

"I-I... I am, I am, but... I always hoped it would be you I'd be with," Aoko says, and if he weren't a Sentinel, his ears wouldn't have caught it.

His heart bursts.

"Don't be stupid, I would have driven you mad. You need someone way nicer than me. Just don't make it Hakuba," he tells her, giving her a short laugh and a wave.

He can see how she tries to shake her head, tries to reach out for him again, but he just turns on his heels and makes his escape.

Kaito rushes through the door and along the street before she can even start to get her bearings. He only finds he has no direction to run to when he is sitting in a subway cart with no idea where it's going. The music in his head is steadily swelling, like a choir racing towards a fulminant finale, barely keeping the time, and he is spiraling out of control alongside. He tries valiantly to concentrate on the monotone rattling of the wheels, but the intermission of the stops is enough to derail his focus. At some point, it becomes too much, and he bolts from the train, desperate for air and quiet, not even noticing where he is.

He passes the turnstile in a haze, walks through the streets blindly, trying to get his feet to keep moving so his ears can't snap to one specific sound and his eyes don't get stuck on one specific sight. He sets a steady pattern of motion, and finally, after what feels like hours but can't have been more than thirty minutes, his mind quietens.

He rests his head tiredly against a lamp post on a less busy street and breathes deeply for the first time in a long while. His muscles slowly ease out of their tensed state, and his thoughts rise from the fog of anger and hurt with nothing but regret to offer. That, and a desolating sense of loss.

Kaito had it all planned out for years, only for it to shatter in the matter of seconds. He can't just stop loving her, but he also can't bear to be around her if she is bonded to someone else. He wishes that he could have stayed at the restaurant at least, but he can barely keep himself together. Kaito knows he would have fallen into a zone, and he can't risk that.

It's suffocating, still, even with his steady beat returning to him slowly and anchoring him enough to dial down his heightened senses. He continues to lower them until he has reached a depressing new definition of normal, where a hole carved into his very being, shaped like his best friend, is something he will have to get used to.

He has heard about dangling bonds, and somehow he can't help but think that this might just be one. He snorts derisively at his own dramatics. It's crushing, yes, albeit hardly as devastating as it would have been had Aoko been a Guide. He wonders when he let her under his skin like that. Probably since he has known her.

It's dangerous to get close to people; Kaito has always been aware of that. The poker face isn't a skill he honed just because he needs to lie a lot, it's also a barricade that usually keeps others out. Unless it fails; unless he lets himself believe that the other person is safe. Maybe, he thinks, this could be the last time he allows himself to be deluded into trusting someone not to hurt him.

Something inside of him caves at that thought, and the heavy melody that has taken over these last few minutes, during which he has begun to calm down, comes into focus. It's a classical song, sustained and dark, and he recognizes three things at once.

First of all, he doesn't want to change the part of him that hopes for the best, no matter how much it hurts, because what would there be to strive for? It's one of his best qualities, and he is not going to discard it. Secondly, the song he hears is a requiem. Thirdly, these are not his own defenses.

"Fuck," he whispers, looking around to find the source and spotting no one.

There is no doubt in his mind as to what this is, and the day that started out so brilliantly takes a final dive in order to be one of the most awful Kaito has ever lived through, as a small, insistent voice in the back of his head screams at him furiously to find the source of that sound. At 19, he is experiencing his first resonance.

Chapter 3: Lento

Notes:

Hi,
nice to have you here! Thanks to everyone for reading, kudosing and commenting once more. It makes my day to know that I get to share this story with you, and even more when you tell me that you're enjoying it. Thank you.
I didn't quite realize how slow the build was in the first few chapters, I swear, but it'll speed up a little next week. Promise. For this week, however, I had to check in with my favorite mini-detectives.

Chapter Text

"When white and red are interwoven,

Darkness chased by candlelight,

Taken in a fluid motion,

Is the altar's fairest sight.

 

In order to spare the White Lady her cruel fate, I'll take her away before the last psalm of the compline can be read."



The most humbling thing in life is to be confronted with your own insignificance. Shinichi has to face it anew on Monday morning, looking into the excited faces of three out of four members of the Detective Boys, who couldn't care less that he encountered a possible match the evening before. Their minds are only focused on the heist note Mitsuhiko has shoved right under Shinichi's nose as soon as he took his seat. The upbeat, if somewhat stiff tune in Shinichi's mind wavers at that amount of indifference, torn between amusement and frustration.

He focuses gamely on the interpretations the Detective Boys have to offer though, smiling at the conviction with which they each present their conclusions. They are only nine, he thinks. And yet they have grown considerably during the time they spent together, in more ways than one.

"So we're saying he's going to strike on Christmas, obviously," Genta says with the air of absolute certainty and an arrogance even Shinichi as his old self would find hard to rival.

"The real trick was finding out on which day," Ayumi adds.

Her eyes are sparkling, her senses straining against the protective shields that keep them from unfolding their full potential. Shinichi is sure she will be a Sentinel in only a couple of years. The way she is already starting to perk up at nearly imperceptible sounds and movements becomes more and more obvious to both him and Haibara each day. He gently reaches out with his mind, soothing her excitement and settling her unconscious barriers. She still has time, he thinks; there is no need to hurry into coming online.

"So we went through the options and decided that it would be the 25th, because that's when Santa shows up, right?" Genta says, smug.

"We also found out which time it will be," Mitsuhiko continues, "it's mentioned in the last line. The compline is the evening prayer in Christian monasteries. It's usually held at seven, so KID will probably strike during the early evening."

Shinichi chuckles. The excitement of his tiniest friends is infectious, and the air in their classroom is filled with their lively energy. Even Haibara, who is sitting next to him, is wearing one of her few true smiles.

Her mind is covered in silk, slick and smooth; it's green like fresh spring leaves, indicating composure. She can be literal pins and needles when she is agitated, but the number of times that happened Shinichi can count on one hand. Usually her mind is just as unapproachable as her dry, laconic humor would suggest. Right now though, as she is watching the children with him, the fabric that she projects as her barrier feels warm. He has never met a Guide as sensitive as himself apart from her, or as well adjusted. There are few who can sense the shields of other people like he can. She is one of them.

"Genta-kun, did you know that in some Christian countries, Santa comes on the 24th?" she asks. Genta's expression crumbles just a little bit.

"Also, in some countries, he doesn't come at all. Instead, the Three Wise Kings are bringing the presents on the sixth of January," Shinichi elaborates.

"But the note says red and white, which has to be Santa!" Genta cries petulantly.

"Actually," Shinichi points out, "it says white and red. And it stresses the candlelight, which, though also important on Christmas Eve in some places, is something more typical for the time of Advent, the time just before Christmas."

"What do you mean?" Mitsuhiko asks.

"What Edogawa-kun is saying is that most probably KID isn't going to strike on Christmas Day, because the scene he describes ties in with another date of importance to some Christians. A date which is a little earlier in December," Haibara answers in his place.

"It figures that you'd know about Saint Lucy," Shinichi mutters under his breath.

"Bloody martyr stories just fascinate me," Haibara replies with a shark-like grin.

"Stop talking in your secret language and tell us what's going on!" Genta complains.

"In Nordic countries in Europe, especially in Sweden, the people celebrate the day of Saint Lucy. It's called the celebration of lights. According to the tradition, the eldest daughter of the family puts on a white dress with a red sash and serves a special kind of bread while wearing a crown of candles," Shinichi explains.

"But isn't that dangerous?" Ayumi frets.

It makes Haibara laugh, her mind sparkling as if the individual threads of her silky conscience are illuminated by a ray of sun, and Shinichi can't help but be a little fascinated for a moment. It's rare to see her this way, her mind light and pleasant, the usual aloofness replaced by warmth.

"Mitsuhiko, do you remember reading about Suzuki-san's announcement in the papers last week?" he asks, turning his attention back to the kids.

"He's holding an exhibition of a diamond called Madame Blanche in Haido, I think, in an old temple," Mitsuhiko replies immediately.

"Oh! So KID is going to strike there!" Ayumi cries.

"Yes. Madame Blanche is French for White Lady, so he's probably talking about that diamond. It's going to be shown from the 11th to the 17th of December. And according to the heist note..." Shinichi starts, and Haibara finishes for him:

"He'll be there on December 13."

"You did a great job figuring out the time, though," Shinichi adds, and Mitsuhiko, who probably did the thinking, swells a bit with pride.

The Detective Boys get absorbed in a discussion about how exactly KID is going to go about the stealing, and Shinichi is unfortunately once again left to his own thoughts. He is still feeling slightly off, slightly wrong, and can't help the way he is putting up a front that is not quite him, when the teacher walks in and begins with the lesson.

"So? Mind telling me why I'm hearing a Minuet all morning?"

Well, it was only a question of time before Haibara would ask, Shinichi thinks, as he turns to his neighbor. He meets her critical gaze head on, stopping in copying the Kanji Kobayashi-sensei is writing on the blackboard. There is no sense in lying to her, because she will obviously see right through him.

"I'm sorry, I'm still winding down from yesterday," he tells her quietly.

"What happened?" she asks, eyes alert, and a small ripple runs through the fabric of her soul, like the wind ruffling the feathers of a bird.

There is no softening the blow. Haibara is too aware of the ramifications of what happened to him to be in any way reassured by soothing words. And she has always had a more fatalistic outlook on everything to do with Sentinel and Guide interactions, out of understandable reasons.

"Resonance," Shinichi says.

Haibara's mind turns to steel within a fraction of a second, sharp like a knife, hard like stone, cold as ice. It's chilling to sit next to her now, and Shinichi can feel his music rise up in response. It turn into the last movement of a piano sonata, wild and full of loud accents that rip through him with great force behind each note.

"Haibara, please. They're going to notice," he hisses as he wrestles his own nerves back under control, rewinding the piece he knows so well until the calming tunes from the first movement play.

They are tunes he always associates with a special sort of gravity, as he thinks of an island and a burning house, a human being he couldn't save from his own desperation. It doesn't exactly help, but it's definitely sobering.

"What are you going to do?" she hisses back.

"Nothing," he stresses. "There's nothing to be done. I didn't find the source, and I'm not going to look for it. Tokyo is a metropolis, there's a fraction of a percentage of a chance of it happening again."

"Don't fool yourself, Kudou. If they were in your vicinity once, they might be there again, and unlike you and me, most people will come to look," she whispers frantically, even though the sharp metal of her barriers is slowly hardening into concrete, more brittle, less cutting, still an impenetrable wall.

Her nerves show in the use of his real name where other people might hear it. Usually, she is much more circumspect.

"Haibara, they vanished immediately, as soon as I grew aware of them. Probably right when they realized what was happening. They might be as opposed to it as I am. It was so strong it should have been easy to track. Even I knew where I'd have to go to find them, and I'm not a Sentinel," Shinichi says under his breath.

"That strong?" Haibara inquires, eyes wide.

Shinichi nods. She suppresses a curse.

"Edogawa-kun, Haibara-san, please pay attention," Kobayashi-sensei calls.

Haibara casts him a glance that tells him she will not let it slide any time soon. Shinichi returns his focus to their lesson, quickly copying the Kanji from the blackboard into his notebook with practiced, efficient strokes of his pen.

 

***

 

"I know you think that a resonance just indicates one of many options you have," Haibara says, when they are finally out of the classroom, her steps speedy so as to keep up with Shinichi, who is currently hurrying along the corridor, eager to escape the constraints of the school building, "but that is only half of the truth. I studied this, Edogawa, trust me. There's no such a thing as a maybe with resonance. Resonance means that your barriers work so well for the other that they're basically interchangeable. That's exactly what happens, too. You're shielded by the other's defenses, and they are by yours. If that is given, then you are a match. In the beginning, it might be a very weak one, but after repeated contact with resonances, it'll almost certainly develop into a regular pairing. You will get bonded. And once that happens, you have to consider an additional liability, on top of an intrusion into your mind."

"I'm not bound yet, Haibara. I know what you're saying, but my head is still my own," Shinichi says with force.

She scrutinizes him, undoubtedly aware of the rising sound of music in his mind as his shields flare up in response to his building agitation. She sighs. Soft lilac velvet wraps itself around Shinichi's soul, thick and soothing, draining away the strain of his emotional unrest along with a good chunk of his energy. At least his mind is clear again, his Air settling in like snow falling on the muddy ground. It turns his mindscape into something comforting and blank.

"Thank you," he murmurs as her shields retreat, her own mind slowly reshaping into the smooth, cool silk he is used to.

The color is that of a sunset now, though, bloodred, tinged with a burgundy so dark it's nearly black. She is still worried, then. Shinichi lets his Air float through them both until the red is somewhat lighter.

"I'll keep my eyes open. If it happens again, I'll run," he promises her.

"You better," Haibara replies solemnly.

Chapter 4: Allegro

Notes:

Welcome (back?),
I've been excited to post this one for weeks now, which is why this is so early. Even though it's on the short side, it's still one of my favorites. I'm curious what you think of it. I hope you like it.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The wooden roof truss of the temple that Suzuki-san picked for his latest enterprise is downright inviting. Kaito is perched on one of the beams further up, dressed all in black as he peers through the darkness, down to where his prize is illuminated by the spotlights that have been installed and fixed just below him.


His nimble fingers have the timer planted within seconds, while his eyes trace the rough texture of the silicone cables he has to plug in. It's the last one. The murmur of voices from below mixes in with the soft rustling of feathers and the scratching of claws on wood that fills his ears. His mind is humming, chiming with the 'Carol of the Bells' careening through it as the unstoppable force of a seesawing chunk of metal, emitting sounds at every beat. He is giddy and nervous, aching for his time to come, but as of yet, Kaito has to pull his emotions and senses together behind his tight shields.


Down below he can see inspector Nakamori with Aoko by his side, glancing at the diamond with admiration on their faces. The blue in Aoko's eyes sparkles, reflecting the stone in all its brilliance. Next to her he can see Mouri-chan, the girl living with his pesky tiniest detective. They have had an interesting moment earlier, when her and Aoko ran into each other and it was like looking into a mirror, both of them in their boots and heavy, dark winter coats.


Mouri-chan is currently walking arm in arm with a kind looking, blond man, whose eyes are just as riveted on the diamond as Aoko's. Kaito can definitely relate. Dazzling jewels are far too interesting, always threatening to pull any Sentinel in. Mouri Ran's face is adorned by a gentle smile. Kaito can hear the fabric rustle as she gives her partner a nudge.


"Don't get caught," she murmurs. Her voice is soft and pleasant, a fresh spring of sparkling, clear water, and her man is back on the ground, easily averting his eyes and giving her a sheepish smile. She returns it warmly.


"Diamonds sure are something," she says, and he laughs.


Kaito can't help but wonder. He has always thought that she would become the perfect Guide to Kudou Shinichi, aka Edogawa Conan-kun, who is currently but five steps behind her, scanning the scene with admirable focus.


His sharp eyes miss nothing, and even in a body so much smaller than what he is used to, what he should possess, he has no difficulties to take in every single feature of today's setting, catching the projection of the wall still hidden in the shadows, not revealing the myriad of candles Kaito has assembled all around the room. He is even squinting towards the contraption Kaito has built to lower both, himself and a giant cross, down towards 'Madame Blanche'. It should be impossible to discern completely though, in the absence of light. There are scarcely any Sentinels capable of seeing it; they would have to be extraordinarily sensitive. Kaito has tested it himself, so he is pretty confident in his concealment. But still, with the way the small detective is looking, he almost feels insecure.


Mouri-tantei is busy blurting harebrained theories at Nakamori, leaving the little one free to roam, which is actually not quite in Kaito's interest. He knows his plan is sound though. The other will be left with nothing to do but watching helplessly as Kaito makes his escape.


His eyes are following Tantei-kun, regardless. He is a threat, but he is also a challenge, and if Kaito is honest, his presence today is a delightful distraction from the bitterness and pain he still feels about Aoko being a Sentinel. By now, it's mostly his own reaction to those news and especially the consequences they had that bother him. They ended up leading him almost into the arms of a Guide so insanely compatible with him they slipped into a resonance without even facing one another. Kaito shudders, and not just from the breeze that makes its way through the openings in the truss.


That is when he notices how Tantei-kun attaches his hand to Aoko's. He can see his lips move as he asks a question. There is a speck of dust on his glasses, Kaito realizes, as they catch and swallow the light, hiding the other's eyes.


Aoko's focus snaps away from the diamond just like that of Mouri-chan's partner did a little earlier. It gives Kaito pause. Maybe she hasn't been as absorbed in the stone as he thought. He watches how the small detective retrieves his hand and gives Aoko a childish grin as she answers his question with a patient smile of her own. She looks relaxed and excited at once. Kaito heart warms. Perhaps it's okay after all that no one is reigning the detective in if he uses his space to cheer up Kaito's friend.


He draws the music in his mind closer, like he would a scarf in cold weather. The sound of bells is almost physically audible to him. It will be time to go in a couple of minutes. Kaito gets into position and pulls out an old-fashioned pocket watch, eyes glued to its hands as they move forward to the time he has set for himself. Below, he can see the police circling in closer and closer, looking around in distrust, trying to identify any suspicious person.


Only Tantei-kun keeps his distance. His eyes go back and forth between the roof truss, where Kaito is hidden, and the nooks in the wall. Kaito snaps the watch closed with a soft jingle and calls in a loud, clear voice "ONE, TWO, THREE!"


He disappears in a cloud of smoke which has the doves he kept hidden on top of the beams rise up and then descend on the mystified audience with a rush of feathered wings. The spots and all electric light fail simultaneously as candles flicker to life on every available surface higher up on the walls.


In the commotion and the magical, soft lighting, Kaito emerges in his white suit and lets the large cross he has prepared lower itself into the crowd. His doves settle themselves on the police officers, blocking their view. They are trained to target the Guides and Neutrals specifically, as the Sentinels are captured by the flames; eyes, ears, smell, and sense of touch all simultaneously drawn to the source of light, the soft whisper of burning wax and wick, the smell of smoldering and the warmth on their skin.


His own senses are firing, everything dialed up to maximum. His eyes are so quick and sharp that everything seems to move in slow motion, his ears so alert he can hear every single gasp among the visitors, his skin so sensitive he can feel the brushes of air caused by the beats of his birds' wings. Adrenaline washes through his veins. He is more focused than ever, as every fiber of his being stretches towards the diamond.


"My darling advisor Suzuki," he says, almost singing the words as he descends upon them with a wide smirk stretching across his face, "I thank you for this early Christmas present. You certainly know how to meet my tastes. I hope you appreciate the festive setting."


Suzuki, a Neutral himself and less distracted by sensory overload, tries to make his way towards the thief, but he gets blocked by all the helpless Sentinels and struggling officers from approaching Kaito. Tantei-kun is currently trying to fight of Lucky who found him immediately and decided to stay and bother him, rather than a further off Guide. It is probably for the better, since he is no more handicapped by the candles than Kaito is. Kaito gives him a daring wink as he grabs the jewel and activates a grappling hook that will pull him up into the truss again.


As his wanna-be captors move like a wave towards him, advisor Suzuki wailing in disdain upon noticing that Kaito has cut off the entire electricity, thus rendering his pre-installed trap useless, Kaito disappears in a puff of festive red smoke. He sheds his bright suit in favor of a dark attire that will keep him hidden within the darkness and lets the hook pull him up.


The chaos below is immense, especially with all the off-kilter Sentinels, confused and shocked by the sudden impressions. Kaito feels a little guilty, but he can't help that the police still hasn't thought about not bringing them. Besides, he is taking his birds with him, so he is sure the Guides on scene will help calm down any agitation.

As if in response to his thoughts, he feels the Guides flare up. Usually a Sentinel isn't aware of a Guide's mental shields. Kaito knows each of them has a certain way to draw a Sentinel's focus in. The feeling their mind projects might interact with different senses of the Sentinel, but while anyone, even a Neutral or fellow Guide, notices a Guide's mind brushing their own, to a Sentinel it will be as if they're truly sensing whatever the Guide projects.


Hakuba usually shows a restless Sentinel a spring meadow in the mountains, a picture so disgustingly pretty it makes Kaito want to puke. He can also project any other sort of scenery or even people, the clarity of his images being unrivaled as far as Kaito knows. He is kind of glad that he is not a visual type himself.


Mouri-chan, one of the strongest Guides among the spectators, is projecting a calming ocean. She is not primarily focusing on only one sense; her image is a mixture of an actual picture and the feeling of the gentle, shallow, warm waves and fresh seawind surrounding you. Each sensation on its own is rather weak, but combined they are infinitely pleasant, and Kaito can see how quite a few Sentinels in her vicinity begin to stir again, shielded from the intense onslaught of stimuli.


It's then, that he hears it. The melody that has been stuck in his head all day, the clear chimes of bells, the rising voices of the choir, the energetic, forceful movements of the orchestra, it's all exactly what Kaito's mind has supplied him with. It fills up the redecorated temple, completing the illusion of being in a church. Every Sentinel perks up at the powerful sound that is almost physical, and they seem confused, instinctively looking around as if they can't make out the source. Kaito, however, hidden on a beam high up, surrounded by his doves, doesn't have any trouble locating it. Their eyes meet. A flimsy fragment of a thought, a tendril of emotions connects them as their rhythms align effortlessly and the music seems to swell, growing into a breathtaking, speedy fortissimo, before falling silent.

 
Kaito can count the times during which his mind was this quiet after coming online on one hand. There are exactly two: right now, and the short moment of silence two weeks ago, when he experienced his first resonance. It's the same now, the way their rhythms fall into step with each other, and the clear, concise sound the other is projecting. It's just what Kaito heard during the disastrous night when Solo told him about her status, and he is beyond surprised Tantei-kun is a Guide, but that is nothing compared to the bafflement he feels in the face of their staggering compatibility.


Kaito always knew that he could only match with a Guide with very strong mental shields. The only one who ever came close was Hakuba, but his powers focus on images and Kaito's mind has forever leaned towards sounds. He just never expected to find someone who would suit him this perfectly, much less for it to be a more than capable detective currently trapped in the body of a nine years old child. To make matters worse, this must add incentive and means for Tantei-kun to catch him and in all honesty, Kaito doesn't think he needs any of that.


His blood is rushing in his ears and he can feel the panic rise in his chest. His hands are sweaty, and the diamond sits heavy in his pocket. His eyes are flicking around, torn between continuing to stare at Kudou Shinichi's alter ego and scanning for a way out. His nose is overloaded with the scent of dying candles, and his skin feels too tight, irritated by the rough beam below his knee and palm and the cold air entering through the cracks in the roof.


A music he has only heard once, for nothing but a second, sets in, somewhat forced but also familiar. Air, Kaito thinks, as he notices the gentle brush of another conscience against his. The connection between them flares to life, stronger, more tangible. It's reassuring and settling, not at all threatening, and not searching. The brush of the other's mind steadies Kaito's shaking limbs in their precarious position so his own mind can jump in and take over, raise his shields again.


It's hopeless, Kaito knows, to try banishing the sound of the Air from his head. They are linked now, bonded, whether they want it or not. Instead, he focuses on the one thing he knows he how to do: getting out of there.

Notes:

A thousand thanks to BlitheBoa, who encapsulated the atmosphere of the temple scene in a breathtaking piece of art. Feel free to check it out! You can find it here: Temple Scene

Chapter 5: Larghissimo

Notes:

Hi,
so this week, I'm going to do this a little bit differently and post two chapters at once. Originally, I had these two chapters planned as one, too, so they are both from Shinichi's perspective, but I thought the chapter length was getting out of hand so I split them. Ironically, after these two, my chapters exploded, somewhat, so maybe I needn't have bothered.
I want to thank you again for reading, leaving kudos, and commenting, it makes me truly happy! Thank you so much for following this story.

Chapter Text

The light from the street lamps below casts the Kanji glued to the windows as strange distorted shadows on the ceiling. Freezing and empty, the detective agency lies in darkness. Shinichi hasn't bothered with the lights. The moon, high in the sky and still full, looks so much smaller, so much colder and paler, up on the wintry firmament over Tokyo than it did when it rose hours ago. Shinichi feels like his insides are a vast, hollow space, drafty and desolate, sucking all his energy right out of him. He is lying on one of the couches in the center of the room, staring dispassionately up into the empty space.

Across his mental wasteland, a melancholic guitar tune rings out. The unfulfilled longing and the echoing, faraway notes of the instrument leave him paralyzed to his core, turning him into motionless stone. The harmonizing voices that sound alongside the guitar seem to want to ridicule him, reminding him of his and KID's rhythm falling in step with each other, just as easy, just as seamlessly.

Shinichi used to have a choice which music played in his mind. He doesn't, anymore. The song comes out of nowhere, stuck in his brain like a catchy tune from the radio, only much clearer. Saying goodbye to Ran was hard enough on its own. He never imagined he would have to part with his independence on top of that.

A Guide can live well on his or her own. Even a Sentinel can, as KID has proven impressively if the short glimpses of his senses that Shinichi received before the Phantom Thief made his escape are anything to go by. His wish for an autonomous life without a bond-partner hasn't been delusional or far-fetched.

He thought he was on a good way, too. After all, there are no spontaneous bonds, they all need a precursor of some sort. Close contact, preferably skin to skin, repeated brushes of the minds, though not necessarily with a Guide shielding the Sentinel or a Sentinel sharing his senses being involved, but a certain exchange has to exist. Shinichi didn't think there was someone who fit the bill in his life before this evening.

In retrospect, it's painfully obvious that he was wrong. KID and him have had enough run-ins over the years to meet those criteria, especially after their recent trip to Singapore which brought them much closer than Shinichi would have willingly allowed himself to be with anyone outside of his immediate circle. Shinichi didn't know KID was a Sentinel then, but that doesn't mean he didn't recognize it on a subconscious, physical level. All those heists and their bantering might have well formed a base for a bond.

And if the foundation is laid, it's pretty easy for a bond to form as soon as there is contact between a Guide's and a Sentinel's conscience. That taken into consideration, what better way is there than a strong projection to seal it?

Shinichi has promised Haibara to be careful, be more guarded, but at the most important moment his desire to help took over. It's natural for any Guide, almost a reflex, like reaching out to catch someone who is stumbling. Shinichi has always known it to be dangerous, has been warned against meddling countless times by Haibara, and yet, he has never been able to temper the part of himself that impulsively takes off after a bad guy, so it's not really surprising that he can't keep from trying to help a flailing Sentinel, either. At first, for a short period of time, Shinichi hoped the bond hadn't formed. But there is no denying its presence anymore, small and brittle as it might be. It's like a thin thread of yarn, tethering him to a man he doesn't even know.

It's ironic how it is happening now, when he has almost brought the Black Org behind bars, when it's nearly, but not quite, over. Haibara has promised him the antidote by next spring, when they will probably be down to one or two branches of the widespread syndicate. Vermouth is still on the run, but Shinichi doubts they will ever find her. She is someone on his personal hit list, for sure, but she is also not going to cause much harm on her own.

Gin and Vodka are gone, and so is the boss, but the same can't be said for the many parts of the contraband related people they have not yet apprehended, according to both, Mitsunashi Rena and Haibara herself.

Be that as it may, Shinichi has set a countdown to his constrained, secretive life. It was to expire in March or in April, at the latest. Now, though, it seems he is not only bound to another person he doesn't even know the real name of, he is also connected to an internationally wanted jewel thief, that, for all his weird antics and flashes of kindness, remains a criminal. Shinichi is not ready to trade his life as Conan for one where he is biding and abetting a thug.

His sense of justice intervenes with his pondering at that point, reminding him that while it's true that KID isn't on the same side of the law as him, he is never working towards nefarious goals. Though his methods might be nothing Shinichi would necessarily choose himself, the thief has never given him reason to doubt that there is a good intention behind his actions. KID is not the sort of enemy Shinichi needs to meet with fire. The occasional well-placed soccer ball is more than enough.

Still, Shinichi is stuck between a rock and a hard place, and more than anything he dreads facing Haibara in the morning. He also feels too small, more acutely than he ever has, as the reactions to the unsteady bond course through his bloodstream. It's overpowering, the sense of yearning, the flashes of emotions that probably aren't his, even if they are just as agitated.

Emotions aren't something as physical as sensory input. It's known that Guides get flashes of how their bonded Sentinel is feeling, even while they are far apart. It's hardly anything concrete, just a disjoint, fleeting echo of something that is going through the other's mind.

While Shinichi's head is an ice desert right now, KID's feels like a thunderstorm, jumpy, noisy, and chaotic. It gives him a headache, the disconnect between the way they are panicking. He longs for Haibara's calm, even though he knows he can't ask her. He remembers how it felt, deciding that maybe he can drain away some of their agitation by emulating her type of guiding for once. He remembers a frozen, snow-covered lake. Soothing snow falls soundlessly through the guitar melody Shinichi still can't tune out. The tumbling flakes remind him of his favorite Air's sinking movement. The image seems to work, because he can feel episodes of calm interlace the tempest in KID's head. It seems to die down slowly, first the metaphorical thunder, then the wind as his thoughts quieten. Eventually, Shinichi is left in a freezing snowfall, and KID in the pouring rain. It's all he can do at the moment, Shinichi thinks apologetically.

As if it knows it's time to take his thoughts of the issue, his phone rings. Shinichi holds the screen up to his eyes, overcome with trepidation. It's two AM. No one calls that late with good news. He checks the ID and is more relieved than usually when Hattori's name is written on the display and not Haibara's or Akai's.

"Yes?" he says, picking up quickly.

"Are you already in the know, Kudou?" Hattori asks, voice brittle.

"I believe not, otherwise I wouldn't be about to ask you what you're going on about," Shinichi replies drily.

"Remember the porcelain case?" Hattori asks, undeterred by Shinichi's sarcasm.

"It's been barely two weeks, Hattori, and my brain is functional."

"She's dead," Hattori states.

Shinichi has an image in his head, of refined features and a mind colder than his own right now, tethered to the world by nothing but a tired heart aware that its beats are numbered. But it had still been beating. It had still some life left.

"That's quick," Shinichi says.

"Come off it, Kudou, it hasn't been a natural death," Hattori hisses, and Shinichi sighs.

"What are the facts?" he asks.

"The facts," Hattori says, "are that she was, against all expectations, still lucid until this afternoon. She was even able to have a conversation, no matter how deeply she seemed to be in a zone when she was arrested. And then, this night, they report her death by sudden heart-failure, the sort of thing you expect from a Sentinel who has been in a deep zone for at least three weeks."

"That's impossible, Hattori. She should be falling into that kind of zone right about now, and there is no way she could have been in the right state of mind to hold a conversation if she were. I was barely able to talk to her when we identified her as the killer that afternoon," Shinichi says, restless and impatient. His mind starts firing away, music fading into the background and snow picking up speed. All the calm he has worked so hard for is going down the drain like lukewarm bathwater.

"And yet, it is like I said. Satou-san called minutes ago, to let me know," Hattori replies. He sounds as tense as Shinichi feels.

"Why would she call you in the middle of the night for that?" Shinichi asks suspiciously.

No matter how strange the circumstances, this is the type of news that can wait till morning. The woman in question is dead, so there is no need for urgent action; it won't bring her back. So unless... A dark premonition is creeping up on Shinichi, and the knuckles of the hand on his phone go white.

"Hattori... This is really a series of cases, isn't it?"

Chapter 6: Allegretto

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The room of the facility is sterile in a decidedly bland way. Shinichi recognizes the specific type of color the centers commonly use for their bedrooms. It does neither emit nor absorb strong smells, nor does it show a lot of texture. It's the kind of smooth that is designed to not catch the attention of anyone, and the white is so carefully neutral it borders on gray.

On the bed with sheets the exact same color lies the motionless figure of Kagami Haru, eyes wide open and face scrunched up in an expression of pain. Her hands are twisted into claws that have grown stiff around the fabric below her. The light is cold and unforgiving, illuminating the corpse in a way that leaves nothing unseen. And yet, Shinichi thinks, suppressing a yawn as he scans the scene alongside Hattori, there is probably nothing to be seen.

His mind has calmed almost on its own as soon as he stepped into the Sentinel-Guide-Center, his Air coming back effortlessly as his focus snapped to the case before him. He knows that, come hell or high water, there is nothing that will keep him from functioning on a crime scene. He knows he is at his best, and still, he picks up nothing. Nothing from the confused and shocked staff, nothing from their disdainful superiors, nothing from the other patients that shared her room. There only seems to be surprise and disbelieve, and a strange sense of disappointment.

"I thought she'd make it," a young nurse tells Shinichi when he asks.

He is a Neutral, evidently dedicated to his job, and he has been looking after the new patient specifically. Her status as a murderer warranted supervision at all hours, even though it was an open secret that she wouldn't live to see the spring and wasn't in any state to escape the center or be tried for her crimes.

"Make it how?" Shinichi asks inquisitively.

"I thought she would recover. There have been cases recently where some people got better, some Sentinels with broken bonds. You know, there's this new approach in treatment, where we use impulses throughout the day at set intervals that help us pull their focus towards different things and can stop a Sentinel from zoning," the man explains. "And it worked for her. Even though she was a... Well, a criminal, I couldn't help but hope. If she made it, maybe others would, too."

Shinichi's eyes flick to the box of pills on Kagami's nightstand, then back to the man.

"Was that the reason she remained lucid up until today?"

The nurse nods. Hattori is still investigating the sheets as Shinichi shifts his focus to the psychiatrist in charge of the hospital section of the center.

"Sensei, what kind of medication do you use to help the Sentinels focus?" Shinichi inquires, voice as light, curious, and naive as he can manage, while he pulls his shields in tightly.

Her name tag reads Hashimoto, and like many psychologists, she is a Guide. Her eyes, a light amber, take him in attentively. She might even be a good one, he thinks, so he needs to make sure that she senses no trace of his own status.

"That's a very complicated question, young man," Hashimoto answers kindly. She lowers herself to be on eye level with Shinichi and explains, "We need them to calm down first, since a Sentinel is very stressed when they go into a zone. So we give them some mild pills for that, which work on everyone, independent of their status."

Probably some kind of benzodiazepines, Shinichi figures, and nods along.

"The next step is to help them with the terrible sense of loss they often feel due to the broken bond, so we usually use something to make them a little happier."

An anti-depressant, then.

"Apart from that, we sometimes give them something that would help them sleep or calm them down further, if they are very excited," Hashimoto continues. "Our main focus is actually on working with stimuli, as you have heard before. A constant activation of the senses is able to create a pattern that the brain can latch onto. These patterns are extremely useful to Sentinels, because they give them a steady base, ground them. We hope that by finding a good, continuous impulse, we'll be able to pull them out of the zone."

Shinichi nods again. He will have to research this subject, or check in with Haibara, who might know more about it. It's interesting, though none of the medication or treatment methods indicate a likelihood to cause heart failure, provided they are taken at the proper dosage. Judging from the labels of the pill-boxes on the other Sentinels' bedside tables, Kagami's prescription didn't differ much, or at all, from theirs. If she had any type of allergy or other issue with it, it would have shown earlier. It makes poisoning unlikely, but Shinichi will have to wait for the autopsy to have certainty.

"Who was overseeing her treatment?" Shinichi asks next.

"Myself and a couple of colleagues, who were in charge of the counseling. They had regular appointments on Wednesdays, and I checked on her on Monday and Friday. In between, the nurses took her to the treatment facilities, where she received the stimuli I told you about," Hashimoto says.

Shinichi thanks her for the information. She nods, giving him a mildly curious glance. He can't fault her for it. It's still the dead of the night, which is decidedly not a time where one generally expects to be questioned by a grade-school student.

"No wounds, and nothing that hints at foul play. It's a wonder we're even here," Hattori reports when he and Shinichi reunite in the corridor, a little way down from the officers and the hustle of the crime scene.

"Why are we, actually?" Shinichi asks. "Why wasn't this put down as sudden heart failure?"

"Because that young nurse informed Hashimoto, who then pushed for informing the police. He was saying he couldn't understand how that woman, whom he knew to be in reasonably good health without any preexisting conditions when she came here just died within two weeks while none of her vitals grew any worse until today. Hashimoto agreed," Hattori says.

"So it's pure coincidence and a hunch, more or less?" Shinichi clarifies.

"In this case, yes, it's exactly that," Hattori confirms.

Shinichi hums and repeats what the psychiatrist told him. He can feel Hattori's restlessness, feels his attention flit from one thing to the next, nervous and angry, faced with a crime where a helpless Sentinel was involved.

"I'm sure it's got to do with the medication or treatment somehow," he says, and Shinichi nods, forcing himself to keep his own mind as calm as possible.

He is flooded with a strange mixture of emotions from far, far away that Shinichi knows to associate with dreams. They are as restless as Hattori next to him, but at least KID is asleep, and Shinichi doesn't want to rouse him at three o'clock in the morning.

It's a good thing he was still up when Hattori collected him, otherwise Ran would have never let him go. Having had the option to sneak out wordlessly, with her and Mouri sleeping soundly one story above his head when the call came, Shinichi didn't stop to think twice. Inspector Megure and detective Satou greeted him with a raised brow, but like so often they decided to roll with it, aware that 'Conan's' presence usually helped rather than hindered the solution of a case. Shinichi isn't sure how he is going to explain the situation to Ran if she ever hears about it, but that problem is for his future self to consider.

He also pushed any concern about what the thief might glance from his conscience aside, instead focusing on closing off the bond as much as possible without breaking it completely. He can't, after all, not without knowing how deeply entrenched into their minds it is at this point.

The bond between a Sentinel and a Guide can't be controlled by the former. The depth to which it forms is determined on a physical level. A Guide and a Sentinel can, of course, work on separating their minds, but only if they cooperate, and it takes time. Severing such a connection, however, is only possible for a Guide. The consequences if the Sentinel isn't prepared can be devastating, leading to the kind of dangling bond which spelled the death sentence for Kagami. Kagami, whose death has led him here, to the center.

"On the phone you said this is a series of cases. Where did the others take place?" Shinichi asks Hattori, picking up his previous train of thoughts.

"All over the city, actually," Hattori says grimly. "But they've always been able to trace back a connection to the center. This is the first one from the inside that was reported. All in all, there have been six deaths, and all patients were Sentinels. There might be much more, of course. It's very likely that many cases were put down as natural deaths, especially if they occurred within the hospital part of the facility, just like Kagami's."

"The numbers point towards a faulty treatment system though, not necessarily intentional murder," Shinichi ponders.

"We thought the same," says Satou, who joins them in the corridor while Megure remains inside, conducting further interrogations with Chiba by his side.

Takagi isn't there tonight, but Satou's sharp Sentinel senses are well reigned in, and Shinichi can feel the traces of Takagi's warmth and gentleness on her mind. Much like Haibara, his shields are made up of haptic stimuli, only he uses mostly temperatures. He is one of the most balanced Guides Shinichi knows, too, almost always warm and pleasant, hardly ever transmitting anything more or less than that.

"We wouldn't have continued investigating all of this, had it not been for the daughter of an elderly lady, who insisted that something was wrong. She was adamant her mother never had an issue with her heart, and even though she recently lost her husband and Guide, she had been on a good way with the counseling she received. She refused to accept it as a natural death and began to search for clues. That is how she actually came across others who made similar experiences with their loved ones, all of which received treatment at this center. So she went to the police and got us to look into it."

"Is it related to the new treatment then?" Hattori asks.

"It's hard to say," Satou replies. "Some of the alleged cases took place before it even existed. Besides, not all of them even received it. This treatment is a fairly recent development, and there are some cases where it has shown slight results, but usually the outlook for the patients doesn't improve much. The therapy can buy them a couple of weeks, maybe half a year, but no more than that. And while they do get a few lucid periods, they spend much time of the day teetering on the border of a zone. Sometimes it's enough time to find a different Guide who is compatible enough to help them through it. But it doesn't fix the dangling bond on its own, and it doesn't restore the Sentinel's sanity and independence."

Shinichi perks up. "But didn't you say that the mother of the woman we talked about was on a good way? And wasn't the same said for Kagami?"

Satou nods. "Yes. These cases have always been different, it seems. The families and friends of the victims were astounded by how the Sentinels remained relatively sane, or regained that state under whichever treatment they received. They were able to live almost normally, with minimal zoning and without losing control of their abilities."

"That sounds revolutionary, almost," Hattori remarks.

"It does," Satou agrees, "but that's also why, when the heart attack came, the daughter of that elderly lady was more than surprised. She called the police and ended up stating that someone must have murdered her mother, because she couldn't die as suddenly as that without any indication."

"Did you find anything out of the ordinary about that case?" Shinichi asks.

"No. Our colleagues didn't even want to investigate it, at first. She was seventy, not that old, but still at an age where a heart attack isn't that unlikely an occurrence. But as I said, the daughter insisted on it, and so they conducted an autopsy. The toxicological report came back clean though, and her medication was identical to that of the other patients with her doctor.

“When the content of her stomach was tested, however, they came across a nearly completely dissolved capsule that wasn't part of her listed medication, since she must have taken it in the afternoon and the other pills were meant to be taken with the meals in the morning and evening."

"So she was given a different medication?" Hattori surmises.

"Maybe. But no one knows who gave it to her or what it was. For all we know, it was treatment for a cold or some vitamins she bought at the pharmacy. There was nothing to gather from the remains of the pill. It was a fairly standard capsule. Furthermore, no one saw her taking it. Her daughter was visiting a friend that day and only stopped by her mother's place in the evening. The mother lived alone, so there was no witness."

"That's still a suspicious detail, especially if the daughter wasn't aware of other medications her mother had to take," Hattori says.

"She wasn't. We did call her physician, and he confirmed it. In the other cases we later learned about through the daughter, because she wouldn't give up, we obviously couldn't do an autopsy anymore. But there was one case where the new girlfriend of the middle-aged man in question reported that she saw him take pills she couldn't identify. Strangely, she never found any among his belongings when she went through them after his death," Satou sighs.

"Have they all been seeing the same doctor here at the center?" Shinichi asks.

Satou shakes her head.

"If those cases really aren't just deaths by natural causes, there's got to be a link. If we want to solve this, we need to find it," Shinichi says.

"Yes," she agrees, "there has to be. But so far, we only know they all went to this center, sometimes participated in the new program, and were at an age where heart failure wouldn't raise too many eyebrows. It's not making it any easier to trace this back to someone."

"Do you have a list of their doctors?" Hattori asks.

"Sure, I'll have it sent to you," Satou promises.

"Thank you. Maybe that'll narrow things down a little," Shinichi says.

"We're also going to check the content of Kagami's stomach," Satou goes on.

Hattori nods. "It would be a strong indication the daughter's suspicions are well-founded if you discovered something."

"If you do find something, do you think you could sent us the report?" Shinichi asks.

"I guess. You've got a rather impressive network of contacts who can help you make sense out of it, don't you?" Satou asks.

Shinichi nods.

"Okay, I'll try to get it to you. And maybe a blood sample, too."

Shinichi beams at her. It seems like Haibara will receive some homework soon.

Notes:

So, there you have it. This is taking a bit of a detour into detecting, which is sort of another reason why I wanted to post two chapters at once. I didn't want you to have to wait for three weeks to see how things continue on Kaito's end, which I thought you might be wanting to know? Hopefully? If so, sorry, you'll hear about it next week. I hope you still enjoyed things picking up speed case-wise.

Chapter 7: Larghetto

Notes:

Hi,
it's Friday, so here I am. I want to thank you all again for your feedback. Your comments especially always make me really, really happy, and I'm so glad to learn what you're thinking.
This week is a Kaito week again, and the chapter is somewhat longer, as I said before. There's a bit of technical stuff with regards to the bond in here, which I hope won't be too dry or confusing... But I thought it important for that to be smoothed out somehow, so here it is.
I'm not sure I caught all errors in here (which I never am, but in this case especially), so please be gentle with me if you find something. Betas are a rare species, and I've yet to encounter one.

Chapter Text

Getting out of bed is tougher than it should be when your mind is continuously flooded with unsettling images stemming from equally upsetting dreams of a Guide who seems to have decided to sleep in. Not that this decision isn't perfectly acceptable to Kaito. It's a Saturday, there's no university or school to attend, and big small detectives need their rest, certainly, but it's already past two in the afternoon, and Kaito can't possibly stay in bed any longer.

At the same time, he really can't find a way to get up. His senses are all over the place, and those strange emotions and the unrest he is bombarded with do nothing to help him get himself under control. It's all Kaito can do to keep himself from zoning by forcefully aligning his rhythm to the last song he has listened to on his phone. He has it playing on repeat, which has at this point nearly ruined it for him. It's grounding, but it's also extremely exhausting.

Kaito is seriously contemplating to call Akako in order to see if she knows of a way to just make it all stop. He would take it, even for the price of, say, his soul, or his chastity, or whatever else she chooses. Just as his finger hovers weakly above the contact icon on the screen, the chaos in his mind finally abates. He sags a little with relief when the foreign emotions recede, the bond shrinking in size and closing off as the Guide on the other end takes the reigns into his hands. Kaito effortlessly slips into his Salsa again, his head finding its way into the rhythm in a heartbeat.

With a sigh, he pushes himself out of the bed. It's disquieting how much the detective is in control of his mind now. Kaito simply hopes that his discomfort is transferred to Tantei-kun, too. It's hardly fair otherwise. Mostly, he figures he needs a strategy to handle this. The bond can, perhaps, be broken. Kaito has a feeling that the detective wants to do so, too, judging by how shocked he looked when he realized what happened. But there is the very real danger that Kudou might use it as a means to catch him first.

Also, it's not certain they will be able to separate without repercussions. There are cases, especially such with high compatibility, in which it isn't possible to split without creating a dangling bond, and even in those where you can, the connection requires time to settle first. The usual estimate is at least a month, and longer if the partners are apart much during that period.

Kaito recoils from that idea. The possibility of having to depend on anybody in such a manner is positively repulsive to him. It undermines everything he stands for and it invalidates his hard battle for control and independence. He hasn't been this strict on himself for so long just to give in now and tie himself to somebody else.

Kaito always imagined a new Sentinel-Guide bond like a fresh wound, open and bloody, flesh and bone nearly indistinguishable, and thus hard to sever. With the way it drains him, he can't help but feel that the comparison is not far off. The bottom line is, he needs to do something about it. Going on while in this state of uncertainty is impossible.



***



Whatever his decision on that front might have been, it's postponed when his doorbell rings and an extremely chipper Aoko waits to collect him for a shopping trip.

"Won't you accompany me? I've got to get some sports wear for the training at the academy," she pleads.

Her bright blue eyes look soft and soulful in the afternoon sun, and she smells so sweet, of soap and cookies. Kaito couldn't say no to her if his life depended on it. The feelings of bitterness and sorrow crumble before the hopefulness in her voice and posture. It has been two weeks since her revelation, after all, and he could use a distraction.

She is much more relaxed than the last time he really saw her, disregarding the heist yesterday. That undercurrent of tension is gone, as is the dejected air she had when relaying the news of her status to him. It seems like she is unwilling to even allude to it, if her steadfast refusal to mention the incident is anything to go by.

Typically, Kaito would be delighted. He is fond of evasion tactics. Not talking about contentious issues is one of his go-to solutions for a good time with his childhood friend. He doesn't know what that says about his outlook on relationships, given that in general it is claimed one should be honest with each other. He could never imagine to be truthful to Aoko about many important facts of his life, such as both, his status as criminal and his status as Sentinel, at least not now. Finding himself on the receiving end of a strategic silence sits wrong with him, however.

Consequently, it's him who brings it up after the third store, where the smell of nylon and Lycra is so heavy in the air that he is slowly developing a headache.

"I'm sorry about last time."

She looks up from the joggers she is browsing through. The one in her hand has a tiny hole just above one knee. She scrutinizes him for a moment before a sweet smile appears in her face. There is an ethereal glow to her, even in the unkind, glaring light of the shop, the owner of which clearly didn't think about a Sentinel's poor eyes when doing its interior design.

"No, it's fine, I know it must have come as a shock," she says, and it's obvious she wants to be done with the subject already.

"Still, I could've reacted better. You know, I'm really proud of you. I'm sure you'll be an excellent Sentinel," Kaito tries again, unwilling to drop it just yet.

Aoko hesitates. "I'm going to manage."

"No, truly, I want to support you in this, Aoko. I promise I'll be there for you, even if I didn't... take it so well, at first. But there's been a lot on my mind, you see? I didn't even ask if you came online yet. Did you?"

Aoko shakes her head.

"You've got to tell me when you do. People say it's an amazing experience. I only hope you find a great Guide to help you through."

Kaito would know. He remembers coming online. It was like finally seeing the world's true colors, hearing its true sounds, after spending years trapped within a dull facsimile of it.

Aoko smiles and turns from the hanging rail. "Do you feel like getting a coffee, too?"

Kaito sighs and nods. It's fair, he supposes, that she is so reluctant to speak about this.

They spend a nice afternoon together anyway, and Kaito even agrees to go to the cinema with her. His rhythm stays as steady as it has ever been throughout the movie, even with the flashes and explosions on the silver screen. Kaito is somewhat uncomfortable knowing this has something to do with the calm composure and focus streaming into his mind through the flimsy bond. It doesn't even feel like Tantei-kun is actively trying to regulate it. His skills as a Guide act unconsciously, giving Kaito a sense of equilibrium so infinitely tempting to lean into Kaito does it automatically, transmitting his own calm through the connection without meaning to. It's troubling, and yet it is the breather he has been waiting for for years. When he leaves the theater, his body is loose, his head rested, and the bond has strengthened.

Aoko has fallen asleep during the show, and Kaito is unwilling to wake her. Instead, he picks her up and carries her on his back, her steady breaths tickling at his nape. His heart swells, thinking that he is still allowed to hold her this close. Her heartbeat is another steady rhythm. He can sense it even through their clothes. It is contrasting his own though, just a little bit too fast, just a little offbeat. For some reason the thought stings.

Nakamori opens the door for him when Kaito rings, taking the bags containing Aoko's shopping from him with an indulgent smile. He motions Kaito to deposit Aoko on the couch in the living room. Before Kaito can leave, however, he gestures towards the kitchen. Kaito follows him into the room, closing the door behind them as noiselessly as possible. It smells like rice and tea, as it always has. The surfaces are recently wiped. Kaito can still see the tracks of small droplets on top of the counters.

"Thank you for looking after her," Nakamori says.

Kaito smiles and assures him it's nothing.

"She was devastated when she was told what her status is. Has been for weeks now. Only picked herself up a few days ago. She's going to the center, you know, trying to learn how to deal with it, to prepare, I think. It's good of you to support her, even if..." he trails off.

Kaito is embarrassed. He must have been painfully obvious about his affections, if even the inspector, who is notoriously slow on the uptake, noticed them.

"I won't stand in the way," he says quietly, "I only want what's best for her. Of course I'll be there for her, if she needs me."

It hurts a lot to say. Essentially, it amounts to giving up, taking a vow that will bind him, condemn him to stand by as the girl he loves moves out of his reach. But there is nothing he can do, and no matter how unfair it seems, he can't ask her to make the same sacrifice he did. Especially, he remembers, as the soothing sounds of that damned Air float through his bond, when he has failed. Right now it is him, who is already tied to another.

The inspector looks at him with something very close to pain in his own eyes. "I wished for a different outcome, too, you see," he mumbles uncomfortably, "and maybe, eventually, that's still possible. You're a Neutral, so..."

Kaito forces a smile before he turns to leave.

"Thank you, Nakamori-san," he says, taking his sound and pain to his home in silence, trying his hardest to squash the tiniest bit of hope that stubbornly remains within.



***



Normalcy returns slowly to Kaito. The bond is steadying bit by bit. Kaito is somewhat ambivalent about that. It's only difficult to control when the detective is asleep and Kaito isn't, but since Tantei-kun has to go to school, their schedules are mostly well-matched. University is winding down towards the winter holidays, the lectures getting less taxing. Kaito can't say he minds. All things considered, he is rather fond of a short respite.

The haul of his recent heist has long found its way back to the owner, no closer to being Pandora than the glass of his monocle, staying just as clear colored under the moonlight. Instead, Kaito busies himself with assignments of both, private and official nature. Scans of the news don't indicate another potential target for KID, hence, on the following Friday, Kaito finds himself with some free time to spend at the library. His reading material for the afternoon includes abstracts about art, specifically sculptured precious stones throughout the ages.

It has nothing to do with his studies this time, given that he chose to major in mechatronics. An exceedingly interesting subject for an inventor, it allows him to hone his skills and understanding in the field of creating tools for his magic tricks and also disabling state of the art security systems. So far, Kaito quite likes it.

He is almost in a good mood. His usual Salsa has been somewhat out of reach today, replaced by an orchestra and choir piece he recognizes as the soundtrack to a movie, but the name evades him. Still, he is fairly focused and not in the slightest startled when a shadow falls over his book, signaling the approach of another person.

"Fancy meeting you here. Looking for your next target?" drawls an all too familiar voice.

"Urgh, can't you leave me alone for once in your life, Hakuba? Shouldn't you be with your police dogs?" Kaito complains, looking up at the detective.

Hakuba's projected images are strong as ever, the usual lure he puts out to get Kaito to latch on to in order to prove he is a Sentinel, just like KID. It's ridiculously easy to ignore the picturesque view from the top of a cliff somewhere in the north of England with the connection humming in the back of Kaito's head, the soft music floating through it much more enticing. It keeps the lights muted, the sounds of too many papers rustling and whispered conversations at bay, while still having enabled Kaito to detect Hakuba's steps nearly a minute ago.

"I'm taking courses here as well, as I'm sure you're aware," Hakuba returns arrogantly and clearly miffed when he doesn't feel even the slightest hint of Kaito's mind reaching out.

"Lectures don't take place at the library," Kaito points out acidly.

"I'm meeting with a fellow student to go over some materials of a case that has been introduced today. We think some evidence has been overlooked."

Kaito moves his upper body to one side just in time to see Tantei-han walk up to them. Great, just what he asked for, even more detectives surrounding him. The choir inside in his mind wanes in volume.

"A friend of yours?" the Osakan inquires.

"A former classmate," Hakuba says with uncommon restraint.

"Kuroba Kaito," Kaito says by means of introduction and nods at the other.

"Hattori Heiji," Tantei-han replies politely, adding, "mind if we share your table? It's pretty crowded today. Wonder why, it's almost the holidays."

Kaito notices the dark shadows underneath the eyes of Tantei-han and the tired hunch of his shoulders. The idea of him searching for another twenty minutes for an empty chair seems a little cruel.

"Sure, wouldn't want to stand in between you and your hard work," Kaito grins and moves his books so that the other two can take a seat and spread out their own material.

He succeeds in mostly tuning out their murmured exchange, absorbed in his own reading, when there is a shift in the air. His lungs are constricting and his heartbeat picks up. His senses are stretching out, the background noises of the library rising in volume. His fingers are carefully taking in the sleek texture of the oiled wood of the desk underneath his left hand, and his eyes snap to the corner of the corridor that leads towards the entrance. Suddenly, his ears are trained on a steady fall of light, swift, small feet. The song in his head, his rhythm, grows louder with a now familiar sensation. Kaito is rooted in his seat, all of his being hardwired to reach for the person he knows will turn around the corner in mere seconds, while the criminal inside looks for a way out of here, desperately trying to get his body to move. It's getting tough to keep his barriers up and even out his breathing.

And then he is there. Their eyes meet across the room. There is recognition in both pairs, as Kudou Shinichi and Kaitou KID behold their alternative forms. No way to hide, no way to escape. Kaito blanches as Kudou stops for a moment, face open and awed. However he imagined finally capturing Kaito, this probably wasn't it. Eventually, the detective shakes himself out of his apparent reverie and approaches the desk calmly. The bond radiates reassurance. Hattori and Hakuba are too immersed in their discussion; they haven't noticed him yet. So it's only Kaito, who sees his lips moving, forming the silent words 'I won't tell'.

The relief that floods him is so strong it visibly startles Kudou, before he suppresses the reaction. Kaito, too, lets his poker face fall in place.

"Who invited a kid here?" he asks in apparent confusion.

Tantei-kun's eyebrow twitches in annoyance, a feeling that is echoed through their bond, but it's laced with a certain amount of amusement.

"Oh, Ku-Conan-kun," Hattori says, looking up and grinning at the other detective, "you found us."

"After searching for half an hour! You should clarify where you want to meet, Heiji-niisan," Kudou replies.

Kaito has to bite back a laugh. The Osakan detective really isn't made for undercover missions, he thinks, he is way too conspicuous.

He doesn't pick up on Tantei-kun's lie, either. In coming here, his steps haven't faltered at all. So Kudou must have known where to find them, and since he is no Sentinel, he must have taken the information from Kaito's own senses, which is something they need to discuss. Urgently, too. It won't do to have Tantei-kun tapping into Kaito's senses without his knowledge or consent. There is an apologetic feeling coming through the bond, just when Kaito's uncomfortable emotions boil up.

Tantei-kun is rather capable as a Guide, Kaito thinks, slightly bitter, but mollified at the same time.

"Sorry about that, here take a seat. Hakuba you know, he takes the course I wrote you about with me, and that's a former classmate of his, Kuroba Kaito," Hattori says.

"Edogawa Conan, nice to meet you," Tantei-kun says to Kaito.

"Nice to meet you, too," Kaito smiles, a little strained.

Hattori hardly waits for the introduction to pass, before he steamrolls any possible conversation, saying:

"We heard about an interesting case at the lecture today. A double homicide. Pretty famous case, solved years later by means of DNA tracing. They found some particles in the car of the victims that the murderer stole after the deed and drove around in. Thing is, the crime happened in a remote area, and the guy didn't live there. Still, they never found his car."

"They assume it was a single culprit?" Tantei-kun is instantly intrigued, climbing onto a chair next to Hattori and opposite of Kaito.

"It's saddening how short-sighted the force can be at times," Hakuba sighs.

It devolves into a rather gruesome retelling of the facts of the case, which Kaito decides he doesn't need to hear. With Tantei-kun as focused and calm, it's easy to reign in his senses and concentrate on his own work, no matter how high-strung he actually is underneath the surface, given the fact that he has basically been demasked just now. After a while, however, he feels a gentle pull within his head, causing him to look up and catch the other's startlingly blue eyes behind the oversized frame of his glasses. They instantly snap him into alertness. The other detectives are scanning over a list of people in the killer's acquaintance, mumbling seemingly incoherent names and numbers between them.

"Heiji-niisan, I've got to go to the toilet for a moment," Kudou informs his friend.

Hattori, distracted, just nods. Hakuba, however, objects.

"You should show Conan-kun to the bathroom. It's a large building, and even if he's smart, we don't want him to get lost," he says.

"I can do it. I just finished my chapter, anyway," Kaito lies smoothly and gets up.

Hakuba seems just as invested in their work as Hattori, going as far as sending Kaito a grateful smile at the offer. Kudou and him rise and move away from the table.

'Let's take this outside,' Kudou mouths at Kaito, as soon as they are out of sight, the syllables smooth and crisp, easy to read for him, but not overly slow. Kaito frowns at that precaution.

'Hattori is a Sentinel, too,' Tantei-kun adds, sensing his confusion and instantly clearing it up. They are not out of earshot, yet.

The air outside is brisk, as is the wind. They steer toward the almost empty courtyard, huddling underneath a tree far away from the smoker's area with its pungent smell of stale cigarette smoke, a little protected from the stiff breeze. The sky is gray.

"Great weather to discuss unfortunate incidents," Kaito remarks.

"Certainly suits my mood," Tantei-kun concurs.

Kaito isn't sure whether he should consider this meeting good or bad luck, as it's taking place so soon after the heist. He hasn't even had the time to come up with any kind of excuse. It would have been a difficult enterprise, anyway. Kudou was able to discern him as clearly as Kaito has identified the detective as the other part of the bond. Pretending to be someone else, somebody who had been mixed into the crowd that day, has never been a viable option, if Kaito is being honest. He can plainly sense that he is bound to the person in front of him, and as he assumes the same is true the other way around, there has probably been no disguising his identity from the get-go.

They remain silent for a heartbeat, then Kudou begins:

"Just so we're on the same page, thief, this has been an accident. I didn't bond with you in order to catch you. For what it's worth, I'm sorry."

Kaito nods. He expected as much, hoped for it, but it's still a relief to hear, as if a breath he didn't know he was holding finally leaves his burning lungs. The solo voice of a soprano joins the orchestra in his head. It's beautiful, brilliant and clear.

"No need to apologize. And thank you," he says.

"What for?" Kudou asks, scrutinizing Kaito.

"For not setting up a trap like this," Kaito answers plainly.

Kudou frowns. "Obviously not. We're talking about a full-fledged bond here. I don't think either of us would be reckless enough to use something as dangerous as that as a means to an end."

"I can't say I would, no," Kaito agrees, adding, "I wasn't even aware of the risk. Your shields are excellent, usually. I took you for a Sentinel. So I didn't even think you could fall into the trap I set up for the Guides. I would have been more careful around you in general, had I known."

Kudou smiles wryly. "Are you saying you wouldn't have put me in a suitcase, bathed me in spray tan, and taken me to a holiday in Singapore, making me sleep in the same bed as you?"

"Maybe not," Kaito sighs ruefully, "though I would have probably still jumped out of that airship after you."

Kudou's expression is indecipherable as he surveys Kaito closely.

"So we can both definitely say that we didn't want this bond."

His voice rises just a little at the end, indicating the question behind his statement.

"I didn't, no. I've gotten on okay on my own," Kaito confirms.

"Unfortunately, I can't disagree. It wouldn't hurt if your command of your abilities was a little worse," Kudou grumbles.

"Thank you," Kaito smirks, before adding airily, "though I've got to admit it's a little weak right now."

"We need to talk about that," Kudou states.

"Preferably soon," Kaito agrees.

"I'll be blunt then, since we don't have forever," Kudou says, "I get a lot of sensations over the link as it currently is, like images, sounds, even smells and feelings. Probably because it's not yet fully formed, and because we didn't yet learn how to handle it. I still need to find out how to deal with how sharp your perception is, and you need to know how to close off your end of the connection so it doesn't overwhelm you with emotions. We both most certainly want to maintain our privacy, correct?"

Kaito nods. "That about sums it up. So you didn't actively search through my head to find us earlier?"

"I didn't. I caught a glimpse of Hattori by accident, and the shelf behind him had a section number on it. Your vision is astounding, even when you don't dial it up."

"You're used to seeing through a Sentinel's eyes to an extent, aren't you? Otherwise you would've been too overwhelmed to notice such details," Kaito remarks.

The wind is whistling in his ears, but the sound is kept at bay by the sheer presence of Tantei-kun, as is the biting cold against his skin.

"I synchronize with Hattori sometimes when on a case. We're extremely incompatible, and he knows who I really am, so the risk of unwanted discoveries or bonds is close to zero," Kudou says.

Kaito flutters his lashes at him flirtatiously. "Aren't you a little overachiever. So talented at handling a bond. Your future Sentinel will be lucky to have you."

"I don't intend to ever bond again. I'm not registered as either of my identities and I don't see a reason to change that," Kudou replies, clipped.

There is an unexpected bitterness to his tone that resonates with something deep inside of Kaito. It evokes the images of afternoons spent in solitude, reigning in an overactive mind. It must have been the same for Kudou, Kaito realizes. Their sensitivity to emotional or sensory stimuli, respectively, is similar enough. Both of them would have profited immensely from a bond. Still, both of them decided against it. Something clicks. Kaito can feel it, just as Kudou can. The bond hums, a resonance building up between them.

"'The Ecstasi of Gold'", Tantei-kun says, surprised, as they listen to the music in Kaito's mind together.

"I was wondering about the title of that song all day," Kaito murmurs.

"Suits your studies. Looking for another target, thief?"

The sound is building up, and Kaito's stomach flips weirdly. There is a smile pulling on the corner of Kudou's mouth, a smirk in the making. It's echoed on Kaito's own face.

"That's for me to know and for you to find out," he says, and, unable to resist, poofs a single pink rose into existence, twirling it between his fingers in the frowning detective's face, before pushing it behind his own ear.

"Then let me show you how to keep me out of your head. Your heists won't be any fun if I can tell where you are at any given time. Or where you pull your roses from," Tantei-kun replies, giving Kaito's left sleeve a long look.

There is still a grumpy note to his voice, but his eyes have softened a bit. The music is enticing and exciting. Kaito wants to lean into it more.

"How?" he asks.

"I can probably show you if we synchronize for a moment. It's going to be easy. I think we're both actively restraining ourselves to keep from doing that, anyway. We'll have to let go."

"But isn't separating afterwards difficult? Will we be able to pull back into our own minds quickly enough?" Kaito asks airily, trying to mask his worry behind precociousness.

The pull he senses from the bond is strong. He isn't sure he will be able to hold back.

"You don't need to be afraid. I can pry us apart easily. I know what I'm doing as a Guide."

Tantei-kun waits. He doesn't pressure Kaito, gives him time to decide on his own, to choose whether to trust or not to. It's the kind of respect Kaito always misses in Hakuba. He is relieved to discover it in the Guide he is tied to. It's this respect which finally allows him to nod. Kudou gives him a short, encouraging smile before growing serious again and Kaito relaxes his shields.

He expects an onslaught of emotions, just as his senses should ramp up, but it never happens. Instead, there is the gentle sensation of his own nerves reflected back at him, matching the slight restlessness he can now detect from Tantei-kun. There is no one else around, but the stress of students studying or working on their assignments permeates the air. It's muted though, hardly as smothering as Kaito expected it to be. Kudou still has a solid grip on his own sensitivity, and that helps Kaito to keep his vision, hearing, sense of smell and touch in check.

And then things become easy. The control he needs to work for so hard is taken over by Kudou, who in turn relents his grip on his own mind to Kaito. He finds it perfectly natural to wield the power he gains. It's like using a remote control to steer a drone. The handling is perfect, not too sensitive, yet reacting to Kaito's every pull.

"Wow," Kaito breaths.

"I didn't think it could be like this," Kudou says, a giddy grin appearing on his childlike face despite the apprehension they both still feel.

Kaito's eyes snap to it, his sight heightening, and he lets it, until he can tell apart every single dark lash framing the detective's eyes. Eyes the color of a dark evening sky in the east, just as the sun finishes to set in the west. They are pretty.

"What is it that you like so much?" the detective asks, surprised.

"Your eyes," Kaito replies honestly, before embarrassment can set in.

Tantei-kun flushes a delightful shade of red.

"That's cheesy," he grumbles.

"I've never been able to watch something so thoughtlessly. I always had to be careful to pull back," Kaito admits, while he effortlessly moves his gaze from the boy in front of him and studies the texture of the tree branches above, "it's exhilarating."

"It is."

"I want to take you flying, sometimes. It must be amazing. Hey, can you see this?"

"Do you want me to?"

Kaito's eyes snap back to Kudou. He seems insecure and a little curious. It's strange to be able to pinpoint his emotions so easily, but Kaito thinks he likes it that way.

"Yes. Here, look," he says.

He doesn't need to reach for the link. It's like it's right there. A clean entrance or exit, he can't quite say, like a window to the head of the other, and Kaito can just take his images there, can just show him. He watches Tantei-kun watch himself through Kaito's eyes, an astonished look on his face.

"Your eyesight is surreal," he says.

"Not just my eyes," Kaito grins. The thrill he feels is getting to his head. He laughs. "Do you like it, detective?"

"You know already. I'm sensitive to every emotion. It should be transmitted crystal clear."

"Someone is a little arrogant, aren't they?" Kaito smirks, looking at the tree again.

"It's not arrogance when it's true," Kudou says absently, dissecting the image he still shares with Kaito through their bond.

He seems to pick up on Kaito's agreement, if the satisfaction he radiates in return is anything to go by.

They could be great, Kaito thinks, if they combined their grasp of the world. But a bond is more than shared abilities, it's a fusion of two people, and Kaito doesn't wish to be only part of something else. He wants to be himself, first and foremost. Kudou retreats from his head gently, politely.

"I think you found the access, didn't you?" he asks.

Kaito nods.

"Currently, I'm right on the other side of it. The connection is open, that's why the resonance is so strong. For now, for as long as we don't want to or can't close it off completely, we can put something like a veil in front of it. Like drawing a curtain. It's like pushing the bond aside a little. It's a bit hard to explain, so I'll show you."

He does it slowly, and Kaito's mind separates from the other's step by step. Due to them still being synchronized, Kaito can monitor his actions, the way he concentrates on first visualizing and then shifting the bond aside. It feels weird, as if he stretches a muscle just a bit too far, but the sensation isn't really painful or particularly strong. Kaito calls up the mental image and follows the instructions, feeling immediately that his head is his own again. His shields are up. The connection snaps, the resonance petering out.

"Perfect. I think we'll have no issues. You're already very much in control, as it is," Kudou says.

"It was a good instruction," Kaito replies. "We should probably plan on how to solidify the link enough so we can safely sever it. It's still too unsteady and unpredictable, isn't it?"

Kudou nods. "Yes. It might have been a good thing that we met each other today. Without frequent contact, the bond won't settle."

"I'd suggest meeting on a regular basis, then. Maybe synchronize, maybe skin-to-skin contact. Those things are supposed to help," Kaito proposes.

Kudou frowns, clearly not thrilled at the outlook, but he nods anyway. "Sounds like a plan. What do you do on Monday evening?"

"My, are you inviting me on a date, Meitantei? How romantic," Kaito can't help but tease.

"Can it!" the detective snaps. "Do you have time or not?"

"I do. I'll come find you. Thank you, you know. For being helpful in this and not..." Kaito trails off.

He gets a look of fierce determination from indigo eyes. They are still somewhat beautiful, even if he sees less details now, with his eyesight limited to normal levels again. It bothers him.

"No need. I'm looking forward to working this out with you," Kudou says.

Then he turns his focus towards the library and sighs. Kaito doesn't need to be a Guide to read the slight drop of narrow shoulders at the prospect of another secret he will have to keep. Beneath his mask of calm composure, he feels the same.

"For now, I think we need to return to the others and find a suitable excuse as to why it took so long. And don't even start to think we can put it off as a visit to the bathroom anymore, it's clear as day that we were outside. Your nose is red."

Kaito grins, shark-like and giddy.

"Oh, leave that to me, detective. I'm brilliant at finding excuses that'll drive Hakuba up the wall. This is going to be the fun part."

Kudou rolls his eyes.

Chapter 8: Moderato

Notes:

Hi!

Here we go again. This week, I've got some science talk, some sus talk, and some (I'm afraid I have to say) fluff for you, sprinkled with a little melancholy and heartache. Thank you so, so much for your comments, and your kudos, and for simply reading this. I couldn't wish for more. It's so much fun sharing this with you, and I hope you like this chapter, too.
A short note: I'm no doctor or biologist, so please forgive me any inaccuracies in that regard. Though I should probably point out that fanfics are often not the best place to look for accurate scientific descriptions of how things work^^

Chapter Text

"You're in a good mood," Haibara observes as Shinichi sits down besides her in her makeshift lab in the professor's basement.

Her mind is smooth, like the surface of the ocean during a lull, and Shinichi is wary. He never knows how it will turn out with her when she is in a state like that. She fiddles with a pen in her hand, twirling it lazily over her thumb.

Originally, he wanted to ask her for her progress with the report on the pill he has managed to get his hands on, as well as the blood sample that Satou sent along first thing on the Monday following the discovery of Kagami's body. It has been a week already, and he knows she probably has results. Still, he hasn't heard a single word about them and he is fairly certain he knows why Haibara is being so cagey. This is going to involve some bargaining.

"You want to know something," he says, carefully keeping his pacing even, letting the melody of his Air float through his mind as steadying as it can be.

He keeps the bond in the background, buried underneath his shields so deeply that even Haibara won't be able to uncover it. Since last Friday it has stabilized. There are no flashes of sights that are not his, nor noises he didn't hear coming through unintentionally. It's still small, like a thin string that connects them, but it might have grown a little stronger than before.

"You know what it is I want to know, Kudou. You've been strange most of last week. You aren't now. But if you think for a minute that I didn't notice something is wrong, you're delusional."

Haibara's emotions feel cold and brittle, as if they drifted off into the Arctic region, so icy even the ocean froze over.

"So I don't have a choice but telling you if I want to know what kind of pill that was?"

"Exactly," she confirms unflinchingly, stalling the movement of her right hand and turning to face him.

"That's extortion," Shinichi points out.

She raises a single brow as if to say 'So what?', and he surrenders with a sigh.

"Fine. But please promise to hear me out. Don't impale me on your pen immediately."

"Is this a good news bad news type of situation?" she asks warily, gripping the writing utensil in question tightly.

"Sort of."

"Fire away then, Kudou."

"Almost two weeks ago, I accidentally bonded with a Sentinel."

He watches as her fingers twitch around her pen while she starts projecting the pins and needles he is used to get from her when she is panicking. Instinctively, he reaches out, directs his song towards her, trying to convey that they are alright and perfectly safe, that their secret is still kept.

"Didn't you promise me to be careful so that this doesn't happen?" she hisses, once she has got her emotions under control again.

"I wasn't exactly given a choice. Besides, the Sentinel in question is no more happy about it than I am, given that it's Kaitou KID, who arguably stands to lose even more in this than I do," Shinichi bites back.

Haibara falls silent at that, clearly baffled, even though Shinichi can practically see her clever mind aligning the timing and figuring out how the pieces fit.

"Well, there you have it," she says, stunned, "you found the one person to bond with who could get you into an even greater predicament than the one you're already in. Congratulations."

Shinichi scowls at her, even as something bubbles up under the surface of her barriers. The ice melts, and she is instead enveloped in her usual silk, colored a kind and cheery yellow, warm with amusement and relief as she starts to laugh at him. He is insulted for all of thirty seconds, before it becomes contagious, and the tension dissolves into chuckles.

"This really is abysmal timing, isn't it? I was almost done with everything, too," Shinichi sighs once they calmed down.

"Tell me about it," she grins, before getting a little more serious again. "So you met KID sometime last week and smoothed out the bond?"

Shinichi nods. "It was fairly easy. KID has exceptional control."

"At least you're well matched in that regard."

She tactfully refrains from asking about details concerning the other's abilities, and Shinichi is grateful for her understanding. He knows she is curious, can sense it, but she doesn't force him to lie to her or to evade questions. Years of living undercover helped her master the art of leaving well enough alone.

"So what is your plan? Letting the bond fully form and then sever it step by step?"

"Essentially," Shinichi confirms, "I think I will be able to map out how deep it runs soon, so we shouldn't have any issue with it."

"That's not so easily determined. There's no such thing as a neat, clean connection on a physiological level. In the end, the strength of the bond is the key factor in the process. It always comes down to compatibility," she reminds him.

Her voice is not unkind, but at the same time it's analytical and sober in a way that doesn't allow any room for misunderstandings. He knows as well as she does that KID and him being capable of separating quickly is not as certain as he would like it to be. Still, she doesn't press the issue, and he doesn't feel like pursuing it, either.

"I think it's time you hold up your end of our deal, then," he tells her.

She has the decency to look sheepish, but only for a short moment.

"I'm sorry. I thought it was something worse. Maybe belated side-effects of the APTX. You didn't tell me you were in pain due to the antidote, either."

Shinichi cringes. The last time he took the antidote to the poison was when they held the raid on the organization's head quaters. During the maneuver, he withheld the constant weakness he felt in his joints when he returned into his adult body using an improved APTX antidote prototype from her, afraid she would refuse to give him the pill otherwise. Only when his performance in the field noticeably suffered, he admitted to it, but not before he had gotten himself injured.

Predictably, Haibara was livid, especially since she could easily adapt the formula and give him a concoction that relieved that pain exceedingly.

"You knew this was a prototype! You have to tell me if it has drawbacks, otherwise I can't make it safe to take!" she screamed at him, and Shinichi is still working on regaining her trust.

"Alright, speaking about experimental drugs, you've brought me an interesting one," Haibara says, returning him to the present, "I was able to recreate the acting compound with the help of that report, though I can't guarantee that the concentration is exactly the same as in the original drug. I based my work on the results of the autopsy and on what I found within that blood sample, as well as some scientific papers on the subject. It's not an exact replica, but I think you get that."

Shinichi nods his understanding, and Haibara continues.

"The main component is a stimulus that increases the activity of the cardiovascular system. Meaning your heart rate goes up a little, but at the same time, your brain is targeted. It makes you feel as if you're in a high risk situation by changing your brain chemistry. But unlike the Sentinel specific adrenaline, this drug interacts with the citric acid cycle, indirectly influencing the main inhibitoric neurotransmitter in the human brain, called GABA, or gamma-Aminobutyric acid."

"So you're feeling agitated even while your adrenaline levels remain more or less the same?" Shinichi surmises.

"Exactly," Haibara confirms, "and this triggers a response to danger which isn't Sentinel specific. Hence, your senses aren't sharpening, and there's no risk of zoning. Instead, your mind focuses overall, letting people stay alert."

"That sounds like a fairly good way of treating a zoning Sentinel, apart from the fact that-"

"You're messing with the citric acid cycle. Precisely," Haibara completes for him. She shakes her head with an expression of disgust.

"It's a rather troubling attempt, to be quite honest, in no way better than what we saw with the Sene medication. Depending on the conditions of the patients, I would give them between four to eight weeks before things go south. Well, depending on the dosage, it can be sooner, too. This drug can accumulate in the body and wreak havoc. It's nothing to be trifled with."

"Is it hard to fabricate? And why can't it be traced in the human body?"

"Oh, it can be. But you have to know what you're searching for, and the laboratories probably didn't, in all the previous cases. You also can't so much pinpoint the toxic agent as the effects it has, because those are quite pronounced, but the agent decomposes quickly. Fabrication isn't particularly hard, though. Any established pharma company or lab could do it. Even someone who has worked there might be capable of doing so on their own."

Shinichi nods. He will have to look into the background of the center's personnel. Maybe someone has a history with working in a laboratory, either as a pharmacist, or in research.

"Can you name some effects the drug has, aside from the clarity it provides those patients?"

Haibara shakes her head. "Those can be quite different, depending on the person, ranging from lethargy to overactivity, from euphoria to depression. It's like your main process is being interfered with. It can cause anything."

"Thanks, Haibara. You did a great job here," Shinichi smiles.

"Anytime."

She accompanies him upstairs, notably more composed than when they first went downstairs. Her mind is once again sleek, green silk.

"Kudou?" she says, when they are at the door to the living room.

"What is it?"

"Take care of yourself. Both, you and your Sentinel."

"KID isn't mine."

"For now he is. And you're going to have to depend on each other a little. Whether you want to or not."



***



"I'm thinking of involving Hakuba in this," Hattori tells Shinichi later that afternoon, as the two of them sort through the long list of employees that worked with the dead Sentinels. It's a never-ending row of names, because most of these patients were treated in several different ways.

Shinichi looks up, pushing the guitar ballad in his mind aside. He isn't sure what caused that particular song to be stuck in his head since it isn't quite what he listens to, usually, but he likes the singer's deep, rich voice and he remembers a good part of the lyrics, so he can even contemplate the story she is telling. It's an interesting one, engaging, if a little sad.

"Is he in any way concerned? Working on a similar case?" Shinichi asks his friend.

Hattori is drumming nervously against the table. Shinichi can't quite figure out what makes him so hesitant.

"No. But we work well together," he says.

"You rather do," Shinichi smiles, a little bemused. It hasn't been that long since the two detectives couldn't stand the sight of each other. To see them getting along well is a welcome change. Still, Hakuba is a Guide, and Shinichi knows that Kazuha and Hattori aren't yet bonded. "Is this going to be alright with Kazuha-chan, though?"

"It's fine. We aren't compatible," Hattori says.

Shinichi can't help but consider the unrest radiating from the other, wondering if his fellow detective really believes what he claims.

"Are you sure? You are a visual type, aren't you?" Shinichi asks.

"No. Well, yes, but I can work with a combination, too," Hattori replies curtly.

There is a finality to his voice and some resistance in his mind, making it clear that he doesn't want to discuss it any further.

"Keep your shields up, then. And don't wait too long to reconnect with her. Familiarity is an important precursor for unwanted bonds," Shinichi advises him anyway, just to quieten his own concerns.

"Who would get themselves involved in something like that?" Hattori scoffs.

'Who indeed?' Shinichi thinks bitterly, feeling a faint twist coming through the bond. An image flares up. It's a dove, cradled in KID's hands. It's cute, cooing up at him, and it makes Shinichi smile. He will see the meddling thief later that evening. It's good to know that he, at least, is having a relaxed day so far.

If Shinichi concentrates, he thinks he can hear some fast, upbeat mediterranean rhythm coming through. There have been all sorts of little messages, images, soundbites, sometimes even particularly good smells that KID has sent through the link during the weekend, happy to experiment with it now that he has an inkling of how it works.

Shinichi always answers him in kind, sending back whatever he feels about the bits and pieces of KID's day the other wants to share. It's nice to have someone to enjoy the lighter things in life with. It takes his mind off the case and their unfortunate situation, and yet, it also helps him focus. He sometimes wonders if KID senses when Shinichi is particularly uneasy, despite them both keeping the connection closed off most of the time.

"Have you made any progress with the nurses?" Hattori asks presently, demanding Shinichi's attention. He is a little calmer now, Shinichi notices.

"I ran background checks on those five," Shinichi says, pointing to the respective lines in their table, "and they came up clean. No suspicious gaps in their education, no excurses into pharmacy, nothing. They're still pretty young, too. Of course it's possible for them to have distributed or even administered the pills, but they can't be the source."

Hattori nods and crosses out the names on the list. "The same goes for these four," he says, marking another set of names. Shinichi checks the total count of lines on their spread sheet. It's still at over forty people.

"I think we should narrow it down to the people working closest with the Sentinels for now," he suggests with a tired sigh, "see if we get a hit there. If we don't, we can try to weed through the rest of them, but I think we're wasting our time going through this as meticulously as we are."

"How brash of you," Hattori remarks sardonically.

Shinichi just rolls his eyes. "Keep your mocking comments to yourself. I'm not saying we're discarding the whole bunch. Besides, it's still nearly two dozens of people we're speaking about."

Hattori groans and pushes a hand through his hair. It's already pointing in every direction imaginable.

"The police already questioned them. Nothing useful among those statements, of course," he says.

"They simply asked the official set of questions with regards to the medication, I assume?" Shinichi asks drily.

"Obviously. Like it would kill them to work a little more in-depth sometimes. Speaking of, have you contacted your buddies from the FBI? What if this is happening on a larger scale even?"

"Not yet," Shinichi says, "but I can, if you want me to. And you can talk to Hakuba. The police force works closely with the center, at least here in Tokyo. It's quite possible that he heard something."

"Will do. Thanks, Kudou," Hattori grins, shoulders sinking just a bit as he truly relaxes. Shinichi has to suppress the urge to raise an eyebrow.

"Don't thank me. Just take care of yourself," he tells him, feeling hypocritical. They clear the table together, as Shinichi gathers his notes and stuffs them into his school bag.

He doesn't have to go to school anymore, with today being the first day of the holidays, but it's a good way to conceal his casework from Ran. He told her he went for a study session and a sleepover at Haibara's and got complimented for working so hard all the time. Just one more lie among all the untruths he told her recently. He pulls his music in, strengthening his shields to keep the negative emotions at bay.

Hattori accompanies him to the door. "Have a nice Christmas Eve tomorrow. Are you going to spend it with Ran-san?"

It's the last thing Shinichi wants to talk about now, and the morose feeling that rose up in him before claws against his barriers. Shinichi stomps it down viciously.

"No. She's going to be with Araide-sensei. They've bonded just recently and wish for some one-on-one time. It's hard enough for them to get."

"I still don't see why you didn't tell her already. I mean, it's not like you need to be completely undercover anymore. And she might not..." Hattori trails off.

He seems hell-bent on bringing this up again. It's not the first time, and Shinichi is afraid it won't be the last.

"She would've bonded with him, anyway. He's a Sentinel, and I'm not. She wanted a Sentinel, not a fellow Guide. We both knew it was doomed from the start," Shinichi replies calmly.

"Oh, come off it, Kudou. People were and sometimes still are difficult about same-sex relationships, but most got over it. They'll eventually get over this entire status thing, too. It's not like you have to be a couple when you're bonded, either. You don't need your partner around all the time to function. Once the bond is stable, it works from afar, as well. Physical contact isn't even necessary!"

"I know that. Honestly, I'm well informed, thanks a lot, Hattori," Shinichi snaps, as the melody in his head grows louder and faster. He forcefully contains it, compressing it into a steady rhythm.

"Then what's keeping you?" Hattori asks, exasperated.

"The simple fact that she fell for him. And I want her to have that. It's not her fault, either. Loving your Sentinel is ridiculously easy for a Guide, you know?"

"How so? It's the same as being in love with anyone else," Hattori disagrees.

"No. Because you know them inside out. You can see through their eyes, listen through their ears and feel their mind right next to yours. It's a... A nearness that you start to crave. It's easy, natural, relaxed. In that state of mind, you're quick to like someone. It's... It's easier."

Shinichi hates how he is struggling for words to describe it. He knows it's different for a Sentinel, which is why Hattori won't get it without an explanation.

"Did you see it in her mind?" Hattori asks after a beat of silence.

"I felt it," Shinichi says. It's true, he did, and yet, it's not only Ran's experience that he draws from.

Synchronizing with KID was more than he had expected it to be. It wasn't even comparable to the accidental resonance they felt before, it was so much more intense and satisfying. It allowed him to let go, ever so shortly, and just be for once. It felt so heady, so dizzyingly good, that Shinichi yearns for it a little, even now. He can imagine that it's all too easy to fall for someone who gives you that kind of contentment, and if they are a half-decent person, if you manage to get along well enough, there is no way you will look for someone else.

Araide-sensei and Ran are remarkably alike, both kind and gentle souls, and Shinichi is certain they won't ever long for anyone but their partner.

"But isn't that an illusion then? Just your body telling you you're in love?" Hattori asks.

Shinichi scoffs. "As opposed to what? The usual mixture of hormones that is poured out by your system when you're attracted to someone? It's only a catalyst, of course, but it's a powerful one. And often it simply makes you realize that you don't just fit in a physical way."

Hattori raps his knuckles nervously against the doorframe, watching Shinichi put on his shoes.

"Well, I'm sorry then, Kudou. Hey, you could join me on the 26th, if you'd like," he says eventually. He is embarrassed now, feeling guilty. It doesn't suit him.

"Don't worry, I do know more people to keep me company than I'm strictly fond of. Besides, the kids have been asking to go on some sort of adventure again, since I've been busy lately and neglected them, apparently." He gives his friend a crooked smile and holds onto his emotions forcefully, so the other won't notice his inner turmoil.

"Good, finally someone to hold you accountable," Hattori smirks.

Shinichi slips into his coat, then steps further into the Genkan. They say their goodbyes amicably, and Hattori waves at him when he makes his way through the corridor.

He catches a glimpse of the door neighboring the Osakan detective's. There is no trace left of the police tape that Shinichi remembers being stuck to it the last time he saw it. Maybe KID, with his outstanding senses, might be able to spy remnants of the glue. The studio probably isn't rented to somebody again, yet.

He wonders idly how the victim's girlfriend and friend might be now, whether they got the news about Kagami. The soundtrack in his head keeps underlining his melancholy as he makes his way to the ground floor and towards the exit. It's heavy, pulling him down with vengeance.

"Are those really all the options you have, Tantei-kun? 'Leave tonight or live and die that way'?"

Shinichi startles upon hearing the lyrics of his song spoken out at him in this way, having been too lost in thoughts, and turns to his left. Next to the building's entrance leans KID. He isn't in his full attire. Instead, he is wearing jeans and a dark parka that bunches up just so, his woolen hat pulled deep into his face to protect him from the cold. With the lower half of his face wrapped into a large muffler, Shinichi hardly sees any of it, and still, it can't be anyone else. Shinichi doesn't even need to hear his voice to know. The bond makes it perfectly obvious.

"What are you doing here?" he asks, perplexed.

"I came to check on you. We had a date, remember? Besides, that was one hell of a lot of dark emotions you sent me there."

KID's voice is neither reproachful, nor prying. Shinichi gasps. "Shit, I'm sorry, I forgot to close the connection after you sent me that image of your dove."

"It's okay. I wanted to let you know, but it felt like you were having a serious conversation, and I didn't want to intrude."

"Thank you. But I wouldn't have minded. You could've just used the bond to show me, by the way. No need to come here in that weather."

Shinichi frowns. It's pretty cold already, the winter sky promising snow.

"And how were you going to find me? Besides, you felt sad," KID says quietly.

Shinichi's shoulders hunch up without his consent.

"Sorry. It's just..." he sighs and runs a hand through his hair, trying to forcefully relax his posture. "A lot is going on right now. I'll try to keep better track of my feelings."

"I'm not here for an apology. I'm here to steady a bond. Which means I'll be around for a bit. So you can talk to me, you know? If you like, that is."

KID isn't forcing him, he is just offering. And since the link is still open, Shinichi can feel his sincerity, his compassion, even something like recognition. There is no pity, only an honest desire to be there for him. It comes completely unprompted, and it isn't selfish. Shinichi knows KID expects nothing in return. So he takes a deep breath.

"I don't even know where to start," he says, "most of those things I can't discuss in public, and the things I can might still be strange to you."

"Try me," KID challenges.

"I'm in love with a Guide," Shinichi says scratchily. There is a pang of pain coming from the bond between them. He doesn't know whom it belongs to.

"Imagine that. I happen to be in love with a Sentinel," KID replies. His voice is soft like velvet. It sounds like music, in spite of the underlying despair.

"She bonded with a Sentinel recently," Shinichi continues.

KID remains quiet for a heartbeat. Then he remarks lightly:

"You know, I don't own a car like Tracy's boyfriend in your song, neither slow, nor fast, but I do know of a way to fly. Why don't we take this to my place?"

Shinichi didn't expect KID to reveal where he lives. He assumed they would go for a drink or some food somewhere, not to the thief's home. But here they are, KID standing before him with an outstretched hand, an offer of friendship in the gesture, and Shinichi has friends, but none of them are here right now, and none of them feel this soothing.

No one is waiting for him at home. From the looks of it, no one is waiting for KID, either. His own words echo in his head. It's easy to fall for your Sentinel. It's impossible, however, not to take the offered palm into his own gloved, much smaller hands. He wishes it wasn't so cold and he could feel the rough skin of KID's hand against his, learn from its grooves and callouses what the person they belong to does day by day.

When they fly across the city, minds in synch, Shinichi keeping the biting cold from piercing KID's sensitive skin and KID sharing his breathtaking vision to comfort Shinichi's raw emotions, all Shinichi thinks about are the lyrics to his song of the day, and how they feel oddly fitting now: with the lights below, KID's arms wrapped securely around him, he does get the feeling that he belongs, even if it's just for a short, frail moment.



***



They arrive at a medium sized house in Ekoda close to midnight. On their entire way there they didn't exchange more than five words, too lost in the city panorama below. KID is trembling from the cold despite Shinichi's efforts when they enter, shrugging out of his coat quickly.

"I'm sorry, Meitantei, but I've got to take a shower to warm up," he says, "why don't you leave your jacket and shoes here and make yourself at home?"

Shinichi nods and follows the other into the living area. KID doesn't bothers with the lights, but Shinichi searches for the switch, not familiar enough with the layout that he could navigate it in the dark. He finds the kitchen and searches for tea. It's too late for coffee already. He discovers some in a ceramic pot on the shelf by the stove and puts a few leaves in a pitcher that is already on the countertop.

After switching on the kettle, Shinichi waits for a moment, idly casting a glance around.

The house looks empty, as if no one is really living here. Even though he can see some traces of KID's everyday life, like a dirty plate and some papers for the university on the kitchen table, there is no personal touch to the space.

The kettle clicks, and Shinichi hunts the cabinets for two mugs. He pours the water onto the leaves, rifles through the drawers for a sieve, and takes the stacked mugs and the pitcher along with him. He carries his haul upstairs, where the thief has vanished to earlier. The lights are on in one room, which Shinichi quickly identifies as KID's. It's neat, surprisingly so, Shinichi thinks, depositing the tea on top of the desk in one corner of it. There is a twin bed in the middle of the room, a wardrobe on one wall, and some shelves and a large picture of Kuroba Touichi, presumably KID's father and possibly the first KID, on the other.

The bed is made, the pullover KID has been wearing lying on the covers. A couple of books are opened on the desk. It looks as if KID has been working on an assignment. Shinichi skims over the pages. The texts are of a technical nature, mostly formulas, he notices. He recognizes a Taylor series expansion. He never asked which subject the thief chose to major in. Based on the literature, he assumes it must be some branch of engineering.

There is no trace of KID's alternative lifestyle to be found in the room, though Shinichi never expected to unearth any here. Knowing him, there is a secret room well hidden somewhere in the house, where all the equipment is stored.

Shinichi sinks down on the chair by the desk and pours the tea into the two mugs, catching the leaves in the sieve, which he then places into the empty pitcher. Just when he carefully takes the first sip, KID walks into the room, wearing a cozy looking flannel shirt and loose pants. His hair is fairly dry already, and his cheeks are slightly flushed with warmth. The shivers from the cold are gone.

"I didn't know you went into engineering," Shinichi comments, indicating the books on the table.

"Well, there is no official course on either, magic or thieving," KID grins, and Shinichi rolls his eyes.

"What's your specialization?"

"Mechatronics," KID replies. He has walked up to Shinichi, who hands him the other mug. KID takes it and settles on the corner of the bed.

"Sounds like a useful subject," Shinichi allows.

"Sometimes it's the closest thing to actual wizardry you can imagine," the thief says.

They chat about it for a while, Shinichi getting to know some of the basics of the course. When his mug is drained, KID takes it from his hands and reaches out for him.

"I'm not sure if I'm up for actually synchronizing again right now," he admits. They haven't, after arriving at KID's place, Shinichi still a little caught up in his own gloom, and KID looking tired. Shinichi nods, also not in favor of sharing his darker mood with the other any longer.

He puts his hand against the thief's big one hesitantly. It's warm and slightly rough, with callouses on his fingertips, probably gained from tinkering with tools and his own gadgets, and on his palms as well, maybe from the handles of his glider or the rope of his grappling hook.

The touch is odd to Shinichi, serving no other purpose than to establish the connection between them. Shinichi doesn't usually touch other people without reason, at least not as himself. Conan is being manhandled and dragged around a lot, but Shinichi isn't. The thief has always been somewhat of an exception to that rule, having targeted Shinichi as himself, mostly, and never having been particularly delicate about it.

"This is awkward," KID sighs, echoing Shinichi's thoughts.

"You mean because you're not dosing me with a can of knockout gas?" Shinichi asks drily.

"No, because you're not reaching for that awful belt and shoes of yours," KID counters with a grin. Then he groans. "Listen, can we maybe just lie on the bed and watch a movie while we're doing this? This atmosphere is way heavier than I can handle on a Monday evening during the holidays."

Shinichi agrees. He doesn't feel like discussing anything anymore. A movie sounds like a good distraction. They settle for the first thing suggested to them when they open the streaming service's website on KID's laptop, disregarding the fact that neither of them is actually interested in it. Shinichi moves to the headboard of KID's bed, shifting uncomfortably until he finds a position against the pillows that is neither too close, nor too far from the thief. KID, after hesitating for a moment, takes Shinichi's hand again and laces their fingers. It feels intimate and Shinichi can't help being flustered. It's tangible in the room, his music wavering. KID chuckles.

"It's good to know we're both uncomfortable with this," he says.

Shinichi shrugs, pulling at their joint hands. "It's just weird," he says, "but it doesn't feel bad."

It doesn't, actually. The point of contact between them seems a little warmer than the rest of Shinichi. It makes the bond in his mind tingle and expand slightly, slowly, letting him follow its strands where they sink themselves into his own psyche. They are winding and chaotic still, not settled, and yet already reaching deep.

"No, it doesn't," KID agrees, squeezing Shinichi's hand for a moment, before getting lost in the picture.

The film isn't all that exciting, and the bed is warm and comfortable. When the credits roll, Shinichi's eyes are drooping. It's long past midnight, and he dreads the hike home to the abandoned, cold Kudou mansion, where he has planned to stay the night after telling Ran he wouldn't be home.

"Hey," KID says, voice rough with exhaustion, "I don't feel like taking you across town again, and it's much too late for you to be out on your own as you are. So would you like to stay over?"

The relief Shinichi feels is palpable. KID laughs.

"You can be astonishingly sloppy with your shields," he says.

"No need to try around you anymore, is there?" Shinichi remarks, laconic.

"None whatsoever," KID agrees and gets up, handing Shinichi a shirt. "Do you mind sharing the bed? Or would you prefer your own?"

"This is fine," Shinichi yawns, taking the piece of clothing and shuffling into the bathroom, following KID. "It's not like it's the first time, with what you did in Singapore."

After brushing his teeth and changing once KID left, Shinichi returns to the thief's bedroom and slips under the sheets. He settles at the same safe distance as before, but he can still feel the weight of KID on the mattress across from him. It's an oddly reassuring sensation that lets Shinichi drift into a deep sleep quickly.

Chapter 9: Largo

Notes:

Hi there,
I'm so glad you're here to read this!
I am also really happy about all your reactions last week. All your kind words and your speculations and theories in the comments really blew me away, so thank you once more. I'm so curious to learn what you think this week.
I brought some more fluff (for I guess it has to be considered that), and then some... other stuff. I hope you enjoy both. Have a lovely day!

Chapter Text

Waking up with a miniature detective next to him hasn't been among Kaito's immediate plans for the day of Christmas Eve. And still, here he is, smelling the scent of his Guide's soap while blinking awake on a bleary, gray day. The strange calm of the last evening still holds. It settled in somewhere during the movie they watched, or, in Kaito's case, stared at, too lost in thoughts to properly pay attention.

Kudou's hand felt good in his in an odd way, as if he recognized on some base level that it belonged there. At the same time, the contact confused and overwhelmed him. Kaito does make a point of not being in the grasp of a detective, after all, so it baffled him how he didn't feel threatened by their closeness, even going so far as to invite the other to stay over.

He can't explain it, and yet, it has happened already, so there is no taking it back. At least it served its proclaimed purpose, the bond being strong and steady this morning.

If Kaito is truly honest though, Kudou being here has nothing to do with settling the bond and everything with how lonely, sad, and hurt the other felt during his conversation with Tantei-han. The sensation had a familiar ring to it, which made it impossible for Kaito to stay away.

This is how he ended up in this situation, with a slumbering detective on the pillow next to him, expression open, while warm, bright sensations permeate the thin barrier that is keeping their minds apart. It's always open during the night, and while it's easy for Kaito by now to keep his own emotions and impressions to himself, he currently feels the sentiments of his Guide coming across the bond. He must be having a good dream, Kaito thinks, careful to keep the Salsa that is playing in his head quiet so as not to bother Tantei-kun.

He needn't have tried though, because no matter how much he intends to continue his study of the sleep-soft features of his smallest of human acquaintances, dark blue eyes open slowly and pinch together to shield themselves from the sunlight filtering in through Kaito's window.

"Good morning," Kudou says, voice rough.

The growl sounds lovely, reverberating in Kaito's stomach, despite how low the other has spoken.

"Good morning, my darling detective. Did you rest well?" Kaito purrs.

"Hmm," Tantei-kun grumbles, face scrunching up adorably, before adding, "stop it with those pet names. Just call me by my name."

"And what name would you be comfortable with? Kudou-san? Edogawa-kun? Shin-i-chi?"

The last is mostly tagged on in order to annoy the grumpy creature that is yawning and stretching in his sheets like a cat. Kaito doesn't expect the flash of flustered pleasure that rushes through him at the sound and taste of that name on his tongue. It's hard to tell whom it came from, himself or Tantei-kun, and they stare at each other in surprise.

"Shinichi?" Kaito tries again slowly, weighing each syllable, and feeling the same satisfaction.

"Oh," Tantei-kun breathes.

"Is... Is that really alright with you?" Kaito can't help but ask.

The other averts his gaze. There is a little color on his cheeks again. It looks nice in the morning light, contrasting his dark hair and lashes.

"Yeah," Tantei-kun, no, Shinichi murmurs.

Kaito nods and swallows, forcing his face to remain neutral, even though his heart is picking up speed, a strange nervousness he doesn't know the origin of filling his mind.

"Then it's Kaito, too," he says softly.

Shinichi looks up, startled, opens his mouth and closes it again, before finally beginning with, "You don't have to..."

He trails off. Kaito watches him, wondering what the other will do, if he has crossed a line now. He gets the impression that they already have though, rendering it irrelevant if they add to it.

Shinichi seems to think the same, looking up at Kaito and, with a fortifying breath, says, "Alright. Kaito then."

Kaito didn't think the feeling would be any different than saying the detective's name, but it is. It's baffling. The intimacy of it is bordering on embarrassing, but there is a rightness to it that keeps it from actually being uncomfortable. Other people have called him by his name before, but it makes a difference hearing it from the person he is bonded to, be it voluntarily or otherwise.

"This bond is a powerful thing," Shinichi muses, recognizing the same effect.

"I wonder what it must be like once it's fully formed," Kaito says.

"It's not like we're aiming to find out, are we?" Shinichi replies, glowering at him.

"No. But I'd still like to know," he grins, tapping against Shinichi's furrowed forehead once.

The detective bats at his hand and surprises them both when he actually catches it, his small, warm fingers wrapping around Kaito's wrist. The prolonged contact makes Kaito's skin tingle, and the bond starts to widen once more, flooding them with an electrifying emotion that Kaito can't quite place. They both pull back simultaneously, confusion and shock visibly on their faces.

"This might be an even stronger connection than I reckoned," Shinichi says after clearing his throat.

"Well, we are quite compatible, I guess," Kaito admits, forcing his voice to remain even.

Shinichi scrutinizes him for a moment.

"You don't have to try so hard with me, KID. Kaito, I mean. Your poker face might be excellent, but I can still sense your unease. None of us is calm about this, there's no need to pretend otherwise," he states matter-of-factly.

Kaito focuses on his song, building up his carefully constructed walls again.

"That's not exactly helping, Shinichi. You saying you see right through me might spell a prison sentence for me," he says, still keeping his voice carefully neutral.

"I can sense you through the bond and because I'm concentrating on you right now. It would be a different story if both of us tuned the other out, but we aren't doing that. Besides, I already told you I'm not interested in putting you behind bars using this."

He gestures between them, before rubbing a hand across his eyes and pushing himself up on his forearms. The shirt he borrowed from Kaito slips and reveals a narrow shoulder. It's like a gown on him.

Kaito looks up and catches his eyes. They are honest. The bond in the back of his mind opens invitingly as the detective lowers his barriers further for Kaito, asking him in. Kaito hesitates a moment before leaning into it, letting Shinichi's conviction wash over him reassuringly.

"I thought we made it clear last time already, but maybe I was wrong. We didn't have much time then, did we? So here's my proposal: Let's put this whole thief-and-detective thing on hold for now. First we've got to solve this issue. It'll be a month, maximum two, if we keep on meeting regularly and solidify this bond. Afterwards, I'll chase you to hell and back again, but not while you're tied to me. I promise," Shinichi says solemnly.

Kaito watches him, conflicting emotions running through his head, gratitude, surprise, and respect among them, but mostly he is relieved that he can count on Shinichi's understanding.

"Does this mean I'm banned from holding heists during that time?" he asks gently.

"No. It just means that I won't be going," Shinichi replies.

"A shame. You're my favorite critic, after all," Kaito sighs.

"Well, then you best wait until February to find your next target," Shinichi says grumpily.

They fall silent for a moment, both deep in thoughts. Kaito watches the dust dance in the sunrays of the early morning, sparkling at arbitrary intervals like whirling confetti in the spotlight. The agreement is a good one, more than fair to Kaito and more than he expected.

He still can't quite grasp how easy it is to be around Shinichi. For a detective, he has a thorough understanding of the term 'no questions asked'. Kaito has his theories as to why, most of them centering around the recent reports in the news, involving a large-scale crime syndicate. In some ways, they are surprisingly similar, the two of them.

"I'm sorry for barraging you with all of these, uh, sentiments yesterday. And I wanted to thank you for looking after and distracting me," Shinichi finally says into the quiet of the room, "but I also wanted to let you know that you shouldn't feel obligated to. I guess our Sentinel and Guide parts will suggest to us to look out for each other to an extent, but I know how you feel now, and even if you hadn't told me, I wouldn't have expected you to help. We're bonded, but we're not a match in the traditional sense. If you want to keep your distance, that's fine."

Kaito hums, turning the words over in his head, and then says, "I get that. I understand. But I didn't look after you out of obligation as a Sentinel. Of course I wouldn't have known about your state if I weren't what I am, but if I came across you looking that lost, I'd probably stay, either way."

Shinichi turns to meet his eyes. His gaze is open.

Kaito smiles. "You know, Meitantei, maybe, after three years of running circles around each other, it might be time to recognize the fact that we've been sort of friends for a while now, don't you think?"

"Being my friend can be dangerous," Shinichi replies seriously, but there is still an offer in his voice and something like hope in his eyes.

It must get lonely at times, being absorbed in a case like he is. Kaito would know.

"I do love any kind of excitement," he smirks, stretching out his fist.

Shinichi smiles as he bumps his own against it. The bond flutters softly, a bird stretching its wings. They have got to make sure to nurture it carefully, until they can pry it apart again.



***



Since neither of them has anything planned, they start into the day leisurely. After minimal prompting, Shinichi agrees to leave their connection open. It's like getting the Christmas present Kaito didn't know he wished for. Ever since the bond formed, he realized just how taxing it is for him to stay in control. Now, with a gentle, sweet guitar track running through their minds, low and muted and just enough to keep them both perfectly balanced, he begins to understand how much easier it could have been, what kind of sacrifice he has to bring on a daily basis. It's a good thing not needing to try so hard every once in a while, but he is well aware that he can't ever forget how to do it, either.

They fall into an easy rhythm around each other, Shinichi helping to prepare breakfast with Kaito teasing him when he can't reach the cabinets. Shinichi's hair looks even darker when it's wet from the shower, and Kaito can smell his own shampoo on it. The scent is a little more sugary than what he has picked up on other occasions, but it's pleasant. There are little droplets trailing down the skin of Shinichi's neck and catching the light just so, that make Kaito stare from time to time until Shinichi gives him a gentle nudge to distract him.

The doorbell rings when they are just done eating, currently discussing the act of a magic show Shinichi has seen a while ago and related to Kaito, dismantling the trick step by step until it's laid bare, all magic taken away. It's sort of sad, Kaito thinks at first, but then again, the sparkle in Shinichi's eyes when he explains the way each trick was conducted is some kind of magic, too. They both turn towards the door, Shinichi effortlessly tapping into Kaito's senses, listening to the sound of the breaths and the heartbeat of the person outside.

"Should be Aoko," Kaito muses. "She's my neighbor."

He hesitates, wondering if he should add more, but Shinichi's eyes widen in understanding without him going on, probably taking clues from Kaito's feelings.

"Shall I leave?" Shinichi asks.

"No, I'm pretty sure she said she had plans with her dad for the day. She'll probably just want to check in quickly before going."

"I'll be waiting in your room then," Shinichi decides, and makes his way to the stairs. Kaito feels him tug on the bond as if to close it in order to give him more privacy.

"No," he says quickly, tugging on his end in return, "leave it open. It's... I could use your calm, and we won't talk about things you shouldn't know."

"Okay," Shinichi agrees quietly, giving Kaito an unreadable look, before disappearing upstairs.

Kaito listens as his steps move towards his bedroom. He wonders if he will take a moment to snoop this time, but he isn't concerned by that idea, seeing as the detective didn't do it yesterday, either.

He crosses the hallway and opens the door just as Aoko lifts her hand to ring for a second time. She looks brilliant this morning, her beautiful, chestnut hair glowing in the sunlight and her bright eyes alight with excitement.

"What took you so long, Bakaito?" she complains, pushing past him.

He guides her into the living room, away from the eating area that still holds the traces of two people having breakfast.

"Sorry, sorry, I was just finishing my food when you rang," he laughs.

"Speaking of which," she says, holding up a very nice smelling bag that she has been carrying along, "I brought you some, since dad and I will be at the theater this evening and can't invite you over to feed you properly. I don't want you to starve!"

"How thoughtful," Kaito comments drily, taking the offering and putting it on the table for the time being.

"You should keep that refrigerated," Aoko reminds him.

"Yes, your majesty," Kaito drawls, lifting one brow.

Aoko is humming with nervous energy. It would be infectious, were it not for the steadying presence of Shinichi in his mind, who radiates calm, apparently completely at ease in his environment. Kaito listens to the heartbeats within the house. They are so different, the three of them; Aoko's, slightly faster in her excitement, just slightly mismatched to Kaito's own, calmer beat, and the quick staccato of the small heart of Edogawa Conan, faster than an adult's should be. Something in Kaito churns at how wrong this is, and he is surprised at the certainty he can't shake that if he listened to Kudou Shinichi's heartbeat instead, it would match his own perfectly, while Aoko's just won't.

"What are you going to do tomorrow?" Aoko asks, distracting him from pointless musings.

"I don't know yet," Kaito replies honestly.

Probably, he is going to be on his own again, but he wouldn't mind if Shinichi stayed a little longer, just to chase away all that empty space. It has been nice to have someone to talk to in that easy, uncomplicated fashion.

"Well, if you like, we can meet," Aoko suggests, with an eye-roll, seeing as Kaito is little forthcoming.

Kaito decides to just tug on the bond for an answer. Shinichi must have listened well enough, because he sends a feeling of agreement along. It's a little weird to know that he is going to say yes when Kaito hasn't decided yet. There is something else in the background of Shinichi's emotions, something very much like puzzlement, and it makes Kaito curious. He can feel how Shinichi taps into his senses, his hearing and his sight, for just a second, before retreating, and something questioning comes across the connection, as if he is asking for permission. Kaito tries to open the bond wider, to give him access.

"Sure," he says, his eyes focusing on Aoko's.

It feels like the definition of the world is rising up as he watches, his Guide prompting him carefully to increase his vision. The guitar soundtrack in his head is perfectly even. Kaito notices that Aoko's pupils are a little dilated. Her skin is flushed, but not in a way you would necessarily notice. There is a miniscule tremor to her lips as she smiles at his answer.

"Great! Maybe at three in the afternoon? We could take a walk in the park. I hear the decorations are beautiful, and it's supposed to snow," Aoko laughs. Her voice sounds like little bells.

"You're awfully happy today. Did something good happen?" Kaito asks.

Shinichi has retreated from his senses, and there is a curious lack of presence in his mind. He dials his vision back down effortlessly.

"No, I'm just glad I get to spend time with you and dad," she grins, then checks her watch. "I've got to run. See you tomorrow!"

With that she leans in, quick as a flash, and presses a kiss to his cheek. Her lips are a little chapped from the cold, and the smell of her ghosts around him even as she has retreated and hurried out of the door. Kaito's hand comes up to his tingling skin, dazzled and incredulous. He is so flustered that he only notices Shinichi's presence when he puts his hand on his forearm.

"I'm sorry, I can imagine you want me to leave now after all, but I've got something to talk to you about, and it's actually really important."

Kaito notices that Shinichi is still keeping his sentiments away from him. He doesn't quite know how to think about it. His own must be all over the place.

"No, not at all, it's my bad for being so... You're as welcome as you were before, Shinichi. I'm just..."

"Confused," Shinichi smiles, and it's a very kind smile, very understanding, as is the fact that he doesn't pick Kaito's desires apart; desires which are terribly torn between following after Aoko and feel more of her gentle, fleeting touch, see more of the brilliant glimmer in her eyes, and prying open the closed-off bond again to find what Shinichi is hiding from him now.

"We should sit down for this, because you're probably not going to like it. I might be wrong, too, but I think we should make certain I am, just in case."

"That sounds very grave, Meitantei," Kaito says, picking up the food Aoko brought with her and walking towards the kitchen.

Shinichi follows him and settles at the dining table. They still need to do the dishes, Kaito thinks, as he packs the bag away and sits opposite of his Guide.

"Can you tell me when Aoko came online?" Shinichi asks.

"She didn't, yet. At least according to herself," Kaito replies, surprised.

Shinichi's eyebrows pull together on his forehead.

"I know for a fact that she is. First of all, I had to pull her out of a slight zone at your recent heist, and secondly because I can sense her signature. I'm usually accurate about these things. Sentinels that aren't online feel different from those that are," Shinichi explains, composed and analytical.

"You think she's taking suppressants," Kaito states. His voice doesn't give anything away, but he is sure Shinichi can read his fear through the bond if he wants to.

"She shows some signs that indicate she might," Shinichi replies. His eyes are serious and focused, even though there is concern lacing his tone.

"But they have been banned."

"Yes. But there are still ways to get them, we both know that."

"She wouldn't. It would interfere with her career at the police. She can't be caught doing something like that," Kaito says with conviction.

Shinichi nods in acknowledgement. "There's another option, though. It's not exactly better," he begins.

Kaito watches his narrowed eyes and the way he moves his right hand to his chin. He knows that pose, has seen it before in a remote mansion in the middle of a wintry mountain range surrounded by a group of magicians and a hint of revenge and cold blood, as well as another house that turned out to be made of a treasure too heavy for him to carry.

"Is this related to a case of yours?" Kaito hears himself ask from faraway.

His head is swimming as his overactive imagination conjures images of a lifeless Aoko, eyes glassy, skin pale, mouth open. A soft hand lands on his neck, pressing against his pulse point. Shinichi is standing on his chair, half leaning over, half kneeling on the table. His eyes search Kaito's, and once they flicker into focus, Kaito can't look away.

"Don't keep it in. Let me take this," Shinichi whispers.

His words slam into Kaito's defenses and deconstruct them. It's violent and careful at once. Kaito struggles for but a moment before surrendering his horror and his fear to the Guide in front of him. Indigo eyes hold his, an anchor amid the storm of worry. Gentle touches of a foreign mind wrap around Kaito's senses and keep them stable while Kaito just focuses on sorting himself out. The palm on his neck is warm and soft and steady.

"I'm alright," he murmurs finally, and Shinichi nods and retreats to his side of the table.

"Sorry for scaring you. I wouldn't have, but if I'm right, she really is in danger and we need to act," Shinichi explains. "Is she going to the Sentinel-Guide-Center in Haido?"

"The one that's most central, yes," Kaito replies, remembering reading the address in Aoko's planner a few days ago. She is rather meticulous with her schedule, keeping it on her phone as well as on paper.

"The police suspects that there has been a series of incidents in which Sentinels lost their lives due to a new drug that's supposed to work on a Sentinel's senses. So far, only Sentinels with dangling bonds were affected. There are six known cases, but we don't know how deep this runs. At this point, we suspect there must be a doctor working in that center that hands out these drugs. But it's not certain."

"There's someone using experimental suppressants on Sentinels?" Kaito asks, horrified.

"Yes, most probably. Recently, a Sentinel that I've come across on a different case died of heart failure at the center, much to the surprise of the young nurse in charge, who then called the police. They had been informed of a different, similar case already, though that Sentinel was getting outpatient treatment. They performed and autopsy and found traces of a new drug in the victim's blood and stomach."

"Do you know anything about the effects of that drug?" Kaito asks, trying to align all the facts and look at the issue from a logical point of view.

Now that he has overcome the initial panic, he can actually see the signs that Shinichi noticed, too. Aoko's excitement, the tremors, the dilated pupils, the fact that she absolutely refuses to speak about her coming online, they all fit in with the explanation Shinichi is giving. It's chilling Kaito to his core.

Shinichi's voice is calm as he explains, "The main effect is that it creates an artificial state of excitation through the stimulation of the body's reaction to a real stress situation. It's not stimulating the adrenaline production, however, since that is what interacts so strongly with a Sentinel's senses. This way, it keeps a person sharp and focused and out of a zone. Other than this, however, it can act in many ways. It can cause anything, from lethargic to euphoric behavior."

Aoko has been in an unusually good mood recently, Kaito thinks. He takes a shaky breath.

"I can't rule it out," he finally admits.

"The easiest way to make sure whether we're right or not would be to check if we find something within her belongings. But she might have a numbered amount of medication, which she carries on her person at all times. So far, they never found anything suspicious with the victims, but they usually didn't search very well," Shinichi says.

Kaito gives him a wavering smile. "If you're asking me to solve this case, I can't help you, detective. But if you're asking me if I can steal my best friend's pill box, then I'm absolutely your guy."

Shinichi's smile in return is grim but firm. "Don't worry, you can leave that case in my more than capable hands. I'll definitely solve it. But for the time being, there's someone else we should ask about this."

Chapter 10: Andantino

Notes:

Hi,
nice to have you here, I hope you're having a good day!
This chapter is mostly case-talk and rather less fluffy than the previous ones, I'm afraid. I hope it's interesting, though. I'd love to know your thoughts on where this is going and how it is unfolding. I'm so happy about all the feedback I received on the last chapter, thank you so much for that! You guys are awesome :)

Chapter Text

Haibara doesn't even blink when Shinichi and Kaito ring her doorbell. She is not surprised, obviously, because Shinichi has written beforehand. But her curiosity about the newcomer is well concealed beneath her usual silky barrier, and she is remarkably collected, even while already knowing the visit is case related. She takes in Kaito's appearance with a raised brow though, which is to be expected since he has decided to dress up for the occasion.

"I guess it's been unavoidable that I learned your identity, but I've told her that m- that I'm bonded to KID, so maybe you'd like to take some precautions," Shinichi said before they took their leave, and Kaito grinned at him as if he knew exactly that Shinichi had been about to say 'my Sentinel'.

"It's kind of you to let me know," he answered.

The disguise he settled on is one of a stocky guy a couple of years older than they are, whose blond hair is starting to recede already and who reminds Shinichi of someone. When he said so to the thief, the other cackled deviously and replied, "This is how I hope Hakuba looks once he hits thirty."

It made Shinichi laugh.

"Very flattering outfit, KID-san," Haibara remarks.

KID grins. Shinichi feels her attention flick to himself, as if to ascertain that he is fine. She needn't have worried. Shinichi is surprisingly balanced today, the bond in the back of his mind keeping him calm. The gloom from yesterday has long dissipated, faced with KID's warmth and brilliance. He is a true source of contentment, and his interesting conversation has thoroughly distracted Shinichi from his dark pondering.

That was before he told him that his best friend and the Sentinel Shinichi is pretty sure Kaito is in love with might be dying from an experimental suppressant, of course. There really aren't many people who take that kind of news well.

"Haibara, KID, I think you don't need any more introductions, do you?" he says drily to keep himself from thinking about the horrified expression on Kaito's usually well-guarded face, as the other two size up their opposite.

"Now, now, Meitantei, we should do this the proper way, even if there are pressing issues at hand," KID says, producing a white rose with a snap of his fingers and holding it out to Haibara, "I'm sorry for not giving my name, Miss, Kaitou KID will have to suffice for now. I'm this guy's Sentinel."

The smirk on his face and the hint of irony in his voice tell Shinichi all he needs in order to know that Kaito has indeed picked up on his slip of tongue earlier. The mirrored expression on Haibara's face in turn indicates he is blushing, despite knowing Kaito doesn't mean it that way. Shinichi tightens his shields. He concentrates on the Air playing in his head once more and focuses his attention elsewhere. His eyes take in the row of boots and jackets in the professor's house entrance. He can't get absorbed in Kaito's antics.

"I see," Haibara replies to KID's introduction, taking the rose gingerly from him, and Shinichi nearly startles at her voice. He isn't usually that easily distracted. "I'm Haibara, a stand in for his voice of reason sometimes. Not that he listens."

"I fear it's a temperamental thing. I am having troubles with heeding a warning as well. We'll be in your care then," Kaito says, still grinning, and Haibara answers with another one of her own smirks.

Shinichi senses her mind warming underneath the smooth fabric, and he wonders why. He thought she would be more suspicious of KID, but it seems like she isn't. Instead, she accepts him rather easily. Maybe he should have expected it. Kaito is much different in person than his image lets on.

Shinichi has to admit that he likes how Kaito feels to him as a Guide. He has always assumed the infamous phantom thief to be more exuberant, but the other is surprisingly mellow most of the time, rather collected. Above all, there is a patience and general sympathy for people in him that Shinichi can't help but be drawn to.

His head is a structured place, well controlled, and while there are flashes of a mercurial temperament and creative explosions, while there often is a teasing undercurrent to what he says and how he acts, his thoughts are mostly analytical.

Kaito is planning his actions carefully, effortlessly thinking at least ten steps ahead. He isn't so different from Shinichi in that respect, even if his persona conveys such a contrasting impression.

"I'll do my best to look after you then, Sentinel-san."

Haibara's words, again, pull him out of his thoughts, and Shinichi makes an effort to stay alert this time. They have a case to solve and they are on a schedule.

"We should probably head to your lab," he says.

She nods and leads them through the hallway, where they shed their coats and shoes.

"Ah, Conan-kun, who is your friend?" the processor greets them with a kind smile when they enter.

He is covered from head to toe in something that Shinichi would describe as Christmas decorations in the loosest sense of the term. It's mostly tinsel, with some wisps of fake snow in-between. The only difference is that neither of these objects sticks to the colors you would expect them to have, both varying between horrifyingly virulent shades of pink and orange.

"I'm Sabagu Haruku, I met Conan-kun on a case I'm investigating-" Kaito starts, voice dropping low and keeping a completely straight face. Shinichi can sense how he is absolutely brimming with mirth, though.

"Oh, for heaven's sake," he interrupts, "stop it with your terrible anagrams. This one doesn't even make sense. No one is called Sabagu! Professor, this is Kaitou KID. We stumbled over a possible crime involving some chemicals, and we need Haibara's help to figure it out. Sorry to intrude on you like that."

Haibara has made her way across the kitchen and put the rose in water, placing it near the window. Shinichi notices that she has even put up a star-shaped light there, which illuminates the frame beautifully. It reminds him of the fact that she spent enough time abroad to be used to different Christmas traditions than him.

"It's no trouble, Shinichi," the professor says, clearly relieved that he doesn't need to bother with fake names.

"Those are very interesting decorations you have there," Kaito comments, watching the color-changing tinsel and fake snow with appreciation.

"Originally I wanted them to change into more colors than just pink and orange," the professor admits sheepishly, "but somehow only those turned out to work."

Shinichi faces Haibara, deciding to let the two hobby inventors talk shop for a while. They wordlessly relocate to the other side of the room, where he updates her on the development regarding the case.

"The symptoms could be those of suppressants," Haibara agrees, "but there are other options, too. She could just as well be struggling with coming online."

Shinichi nods. Haibara is right, of course. Some Sentinels have something akin to a block in their systems which keeps their senses under the lid for a while, especially if they are not content with their status. It acts like a natural suppressant, hence the symptoms are nearly identical.

"I'm positive she's online, though, so I'd rule it out."

"You could feel her signature?" Haibara asks.

"She's got a very gentle mind, not yet fully structured, and her senses are just writhing to stretch out and discover the world. I'm sure she's blocking them artificially," Shinichi says.

"Why do you think it could be our drug?"

"You said it emulates a dangerous situation without heightening the adrenaline. She didn't strike me as nervous, but she was still incredibly restless. It was a strange feeling, and it instantly reminded me of what you said. It's just a hunch, which is why I'd like you to help us out with this. We'll see if we indeed find some type of medicine among her possessions and, if so, take it to you. But while doing that, I'd like to replace it. Just in case."

"Why? Wouldn't it be smarter to let her know about the danger she is in so she can decide for herself?" Haibara asks skeptically.

"At first we considered that," Shinichi admits. They have talked about it at length, while Kaito got ready to head out. Eventually, they came to the conclusion that the way Shinichi is proposing now is safer.

"We don't have proof, and we don't know what the doctor she's seeing told her. Maybe he even warned her about the risks, but played them down. There's a chance she might not believe us, so we decided to play it safe by not letting her notice that anything is amiss, given we find something."

Haibara hums pensively, still frowning but not arguing against it. She leads Shinichi towards the lab. He casts a glance over his shoulder, finding Kaito happily engaged in a conversation with the professor, gesticulating wildly. It seems color-changing gimmicks are right up his alley. Shinichi decides to let him stay there, thinking that it will do him good to be distracted for a moment. He might have collected himself remarkably well after the initial shock, but Shinichi still feels enough unrest underneath Kaito's iron grip on his emotions that he considers the other deserving of a short break.

"The pill from the report you gave me last time looked something like this," Haibara says once they are downstairs, indicating a two colored cellulose capsule.

"They're actually covered in a polymer, which makes them resistant to gastric acid. They act in your intestines. That's why the capsule was preserved to begin with. I use these for the antidote to the APTX. They are not slow-acting, meaning they will dissolve in your stomach, but I don't think she'll notice the difference. Size and colors match, which is really a lucky coincidence, since there are hundreds of these. We can fill them with some vitamins, and she won't be able to tell the difference."

"Even with Sentinel senses?" Shinichi asks.

"They must be suppressed, for starters. Also, you don't tend to keep a capsule in your mouth for long, so chances are high she never noticed the taste. The packaging is more worrying," Haibara sighs.

"Do you have pre-filled capsules?"

Haibara shakes her head.

"We need to do that manually. Companies have automated processes for that, of course, but I'm not running a factory here."

She digs through her pocket and pulls out a packet containing a vitamin combination that is packaged in a similar fashion. The pills have differently colored cellulose capsules, but the size matches.

"This is just vitamin c. It isn't harmful, so it should do," Haibara says.

Shinichi nods. Nakamori-san seems healthy enough, so overdosing on vitamin c shouldn't be possible.

"We need to manually transfer the contents?" he repeats.

Haibara is just as underwhelmed as he is at the prospect, her mind taking on a slightly darker hue while his music slows a little.

"Did you say manual work?" asks a new voice and a silicon-covered cheek is shoved over Shinichi's shoulder as Kaito closes in, peering down at the contents of Haibara's hands.

Shinichi didn't even notice his approach. He is in a rather good mood, steady and completely in his element, considering the upcoming task with a confidence that wasn't there before. The color-changing tinsel has done him good.

"How quickly do you think you can manage this?" Haibara questions, putting a petri dish on the table and a piece of paper next to it.

Kaito grins and expertly folds it two times along neat, precise creases, opens it again and places it atop the dish. He pops open the capsule she hands him, pours the content into the paper folds, and holds out his hand. Haibara places the two halves of an empty, open capsule into it, and he quickly proceeds to fill and recap it, the movement so swift Shinichi hardly catches it.

"That should speed things along," Shinichi laughs, feeling strangely pleased.

He still takes up his own dish to help. Even if Kaito finishes thrice the amount of pills in the time Shinichi takes for one, they are producing more if they all chip in.

"Are you okay with leaving your friend in the dark about this?" Haibara asks, when they are all busy.

"We figured acting fast is better than risking to put her on guard when she doesn't believe us," Kaito replies and reassembles another capsule.

"She might not believe you, yes. Or she could be more understanding than you think. Supposing she really is involved in this case as a victim, isn't it highly probable that they want to study her?"

Shinichi's eyes widen. Haibara has a point. "All cases have been related to the center. If this was about circulating illegal suppressants, there are easier ways to distribute them on the black market," he realizes.

"Yes. And still, they take a huge risk by choosing patients at the center as the group they give them to. The only thing to gain is data. That's why I'm sure she has regular check-ups and gets her blood samples taken, if she really is a victim. But they must've obtained her agreement for that, because it's not standard procedure. So maybe it's easier to make her see that there's something wrong about this than you think," Haibara suggests.

She is right. There is a high chance that Nakamori-san is aware of the experimental nature of the drug, but Shinichi isn't as inclined to believe that this would necessarily raise a red flag as Haibara is. Kaito considers her for a moment, before shaking his head.

"You might be right, but it's not very likely that she'd back down from taking it, even if she knew that it wasn't certified," he says, "she's the type of person who puts a lot of faith in professionals, which isn't necessarily bad, because in most cases, they're right. But I'm afraid she was a little desperate when she came to the center, hoping to solve the problem of her status and probably willing to risk quite a lot, too. It might not have been an informed decision she made there."

"Don't you think you could make her see that?" Haibara asks.

"No, I believe I'm the last person she'd want to hear this from," Kaito replies. His face stays completely expressionless while he says it, but Shinichi can still feel how his emotions turn dark.

Haibara sighs. "Fine. But I still don't see how the people at the center can possibly hope to keep this quiet. Did they make their patients sign an NDA?"

"It's possible, but improbable," Shinichi says. "As far as I know, it's against center policies, and chances are people are aware of that. They probably only strongly advised them against leaking information while being treated. Maybe they told their patients they were afraid of losing their claims, since the patent is still pending or something like that."

"That sounds like a rather risky scheme," Haibara remarks.

Her barriers are made of opaque glass, something that Shinichi has come to associate with her being exceedingly doubtful. Shinichi finds himself agreeing. For something that is happening on such a scale, a move like that is rather conspicuous, nearly clumsy.

"That's because it is," he states, "especially if we're right about this and Nakamori-san is involved. But even without that, the crime isn't well covered up. As soon as someone voices their suspicions loudly enough, the police will close in on the doctor in question, won't they? Even if the last victim might have been within the center and easy to supervise, the rest of them wasn't. Some of the people close to them even observed them taking an unknown medicine. The culprit left a really messy trail."

"Maybe they're hoping for protection from their employer. The centers are a very tight-nit organization. If they want to hush something up, they can for an exceedingly long amount of time. We saw that with Sene," KID remarks. The mood in the room drops to frigid with Shinichi's Air turning into a minor key and Haibara's mind feeling like ice once more.

"Yes. They let Sentinels suffer the consequences of that for years, even when they knew how damaging it was to them," she says darkly.

Shinichi squares his shoulders. His expression is grim. "Well, if Nakamori-san is involved, at least we might gain another solid lead."

Kaito sighs and checks his watch. "As much as I would like to continue that discussion, I think we've got to go."

Shinichi looks at the sizable pile of pills in front of them and agrees. Haibara hands them a jar for transportation.

"If you need to put them into a blister pack, you're on your own," she reminds Shinichi, her mind now a slightly worried, muddled brown.

"We'll manage somehow," he promises, trying to sooth her with his own quiet melody. He is pretty confident. He has got the infamous Kaitou KID as a partner in crime, after all.

"We'll be back before you know it," the thief says with an honest smile, sensing her concern through Shinichi. Haibara sends them off with a nod.



***



"They left," Shinichi observes, seated in the dark next to the window in the hallway on the upper level of Kaito's home. Kaito is dressed as himself again when he joins him, watching the police chief and his daughter drive around the corner of the street.

"Shall we, then?" he asks lightly.

"Don't you want to go on your own?" Shinichi asks.

"I thought you might find something useful in her room while I raid her cabinets, desk and wardrobe. With two of us, we'll be in and out in a wink."

"You might need to go in again if we indeed have to repackage those capsules," Shinichi reminds him.

Kaito hums. "Let's worry about that when we know we need to."

He is tense, and Shinichi is, too. They fell into a resonance on their way to Kaito's home and silently agreed to just synchronize. The bond pulls them back together whenever they try to separate, anyway. The sound within them isn't clear anymore. It's a weird mixture of classical music and Latin beats that sounds oddly fitting, but Shinichi can't identify a single song.

It seems like their bond is shifting, as if the count Shinichi has been grounding his emotions with for years moves and settles somewhere deeper. He is still perfectly balanced, but that balance isn't something he needs to actively strive for now. It worries him somewhat, and he is aware that KID is feeling exactly the same. Now is not the time to talk about it, though.

Shinichi has half expected for them to simply walk up to the inspector's front door and pull out a key, but apparently that is not the plan. Instead, Kaito leads them into his bedroom and pushes open his window. Shinichi noticed before it's right across from that of presumably Nakamori-san. Her window is closed, but after a moment of tinkering Kaito shifts it easily in its hinges. With the darkness and the way the houses are positioned, they slip into the other room swiftly and unnoticed.

KID moves like a cat, like a shadow, vanishing from Shinichi's side in the blink of an eye. He walks over to her nightstand first, pulling out the upper drawer. His hands move steadily and systematically, unpacking and repacking things without shifting them a millimeter from their initial position. He finishes up with the bedside table swiftly and moves on to her desk.

Shinichi, in turn, stops for a moment to consider the room. It's tidy. The bed next to Shinichi is neatly made; there are no clothes lying around. Nakamori-san's uniform is kept on a hanger in front of the wardrobe on the wall to Shinichi's left. Her desk is in the corner of the room opposite of the window, and a backpack leans against one of its legs. There is a very faint hint of her perfume in the air, still. Shinichi sensed it as soon as they entered, mainly because to KID it was strong enough to make his nose wrinkle.

It's another clue that she suppresses her abilities, since most Sentinels don't like strong odors, which they perceive as cloying.

Shinichi notices the laptop on her bedside table. When KID has moved on, he walks over and opens it, finding it unlocked. She probably uses it to stream series or movies before going to bed, he thinks, noticing the open tab in her browser. It's displaying the page of a streaming service.

In the background, he sees another tab open. It's some sort of messenger board which people use to share all sorts of information and hobbies. Shinichi has stumbled upon those before, when Ayumi told him of a great way to create table decorations by folding napkins for their last school event. He can't say he understood the fascination his friend has with the page.

There is also a planner application right in the corner of the desktop. If Shinichi is lucky, Nakamori-san has it linked to her phone. It might even be updated. He clicks on the symbol.

"Bingo," he whispers, when it opens to a well-kept schedule. Kaito looks up from where he is finished with the bag pack. "She keeps her schedule updated on her PC, as well," Shinichi tells him.

"She's very structured with those things," Kaito replies, before turning back to his search. "You can compare it to the planner on her desk afterwards."

Shinichi nods and begins to study the entries that showed up on the screen. There are several. Nakamori-san even uses different colors for different activities. With a twinge, Shinichi notes that she highlights all her dates with Kaito in pink. Work is blue, her dad is an orange almost as loud as that of the professor's tinsel, and then there is green.

It's a fairly new addition. It doesn't hold many details, as opposed to the other appointments, which usually state a where and when and what rather clearly. The entries started about a month ago, Shinichi notices, with the first one being fairly informative, reading "Assessment at the SGC". SGC must be the Sentinel-Guide-Center, judging by the added address. The follow-up, taking place about a week later, is labeled "Discussion of future options, SGC", still concise, but having a slightly dejected ring to it, he thinks. Afterwards, however, the entries simply say "SGC", no further explanation forthcoming, and the time is kept short, too. Half an hour for two weeks running now, every Monday at six pm Nakamori-san goes to the center. If that doesn't scream check-up, Shinichi can't say what does. He takes a picture with his phone, making sure that he is also capturing future appointments.

He moves on to the desk next, careful to stay out of KID's way as he rifles through the drawers. The rucksack is exactly where it was before, but the planner Kaito spoke about is placed on the desk for Shinichi's perusal.

"Thank you," Shinichi says, and Kaito nods distractedly, investigating the next drawer.

The appointments match perfectly, Shinichi notices, but Nakamori-san added a comment to the second one that states that she was allocated to a new doctor that day. The name isn't mentioned, though. When Shinichi closes the book, Kaito places it back into the rucksack swiftly.

"I'm going to check the bathroom. I think she's got her own cabinet," he says.

Shinichi nods and turns back to the room. He walks over to the uniform. It seems she keeps it well cleaned and pressed. Even without enhanced senses, he can smell the detergent, but he can also see some creases that could stem from ironing it with a shaky hand. He carefully opens the wardrobe, making sure not to dislodge the uniform in front of it, but finds only neatly folded clothes.

After closing the door again, he returns to the desk, looking up at the bulletin board above it. There are pictures there, mostly of her family, but a lot of them show all sorts of friends from school. He discovers even a recent one with some colleagues from the academy among them. Kaito appears a lot, smiling into the camera alongside Nakamori-san, their faces close and happy. It's like a carbon copy of Ran and him, two children growing into adults together. Shinichi thought they would grow old together. Kaito and Nakamori-san look like they still might. Shinichi is surprised by how uncomfortable he feels with that thought. He has got to make sure not to stand in the way. The tangled melody in his mind doesn't help much in alleviating his bad conscience. It only serves as a further reminder of how he put himself between them.

The door moves, and Shinichi looks up as Kaito returns, a grim look on his face.

"What did you find?" Shinichi asks.

Now that he is not concentrating on his own task, he can feel Kaito's tension clearly through their bond. By means of a reply Kaito lifts the jar with the pills. Shinichi can't tell a difference.

"I found the exact same pills," Kaito says.

"Were they packaged? Could you not replace them?"

"I did replace them. Those here are a little heavier, not that someone who's not a Sentinel or online would notice."

Kaito's eyes speak of a silent rage, and Shinichi instinctively reaches out to touch his hand. His mind stretches as he tries to calm his upset Sentinel.

"They call them Freesense," KID spits out, "as if they're something that'll grant you liberty, when it's truly only going to-"

He lets Shinichi herd him to the window with little resistance.

"We're going to catch them, Kaito, whoever it is that's responsible for this," Shinichi promises.

KID helps him back into his own room silently, scanning Nakamori-san's for a moment before he follows, probably making sure there are no traces of their visit left.

"Listen, let's take those to Haibara. They might look like what we expected, but we could still be wrong. And if we aren't, she can better identify what they're made of and what might counteract them having samples. In the meantime, keep an eye on Nakamori-san like you always do, okay?"

Kaito smiles weakly and nods, sitting on his bed and looking miserable. Shinichi sidles up to him, putting his hand back on top of the dexterous, capable ones of the thief. Despite his best efforts to return to his Air, their music keeps on getting mixed up, and eventually, Shinichi lets it.

"Remember, we still don't know if this really is related, at all. But even if it is, we took the poison away. We're not going to let anything happen to her," Shinichi says.

KID stares at Shinichi's hand on top of his own for a moment before he turns it and squeezes for just a second. He lets go and nods. His poker face threatens to slide back into place, but Kaito blinks that away, too.

He finally looks up at Shinichi very earnestly, as he says, "Out of all the people I could have been bound to against my will, I'm kind of glad that it was you. Thank you, Shinichi."

Shinichi doesn't even know what to answer and looks away with a heavy feeling in his stomach, drawing their mashed sound closer to steady himself.

Chapter 11: Presto

Notes:

Hello,

I'm a bit later than usual, sorry about that, but here we go.
This is a rather long chapter, and we're getting Shinichi's perspective again, for ... reasons. I hope you're not too disappointed, but I promise that next week, it's back to Kaito's POV. This chapter is rather on the grim side, so I'm going to apologize for that, too. I promise it's going to get nicer again, though. We know Shinichi doesn't leave a case unsolved. Since this is very long, I might have overlooked a few errors here and there. I hope you won't be too bothered >.<
Thank you so much again for all your lovely feedback, your comments especially made me incredibly happy, and you guys are such a huge motivation!

Chapter Text

The twenty-fifth of December brings along the first snow of the season. The flakes are dancing through the motionless air, drifting back and forth until they land soundlessly on the trees, the rooftops and the streets, covering the world in a white blanket. Shinichi would enjoy nothing more than to look at it from the inside, alone with his thoughts and the case he has to ponder. If he is really honest, he might even be willing to waste the day in favor of holing himself up in Haibara's lab, completely ignorant of what is going on outside.

Unfortunately for him, Haibara has forcefully ejected him from her sanctuary. She claimed he disrupted her concentration, which he knows to be just not true. No, the truth is that Ran called not two hours in and asked for the two of them and the rest of the Detective Boys to join her, Araide-sensei, Hattori, and Kazuha on an outing. Haibara, busy cracking down chemical compounds and typing away on her keyboard, was quick to decline for herself, faking a headache.

"But Edogawa-kun will join you for sure. He's quite bored, cooped in all day," she said, having snatched the phone from him when he was about to say no. She ignored the wave of disagreeing sentiments coming from him.

"It'll do you good," she told him smugly, her mind sparkling mischievously, "you need to get out. Besides, it'll give you a chance to update Hattori-san, and maybe he'll help you get your head unstuck."

She isn't wrong in her assessment, Shinichi thinks bitterly as he kicks up some snow, walking through the wintry Haido Park. He would still rather help in the lab, in order to finally gain some certainty on whether he and KID got their hands on the mysterious drug or not. He is pretty sure they did, already, and Haibara is, too, but when Ran called, she still needed to run a couple of final tests.

He and Hattori are trailing behind the rest, while Kazuha, Ran, and Araide-sensei entertain and contain three exuberant Detective Boy members busily throwing snowballs at each other. Shinichi would like to start talking about the case, but he has got to make sure Araide-sensei is far enough away or sufficiently distracted.

The latter is easier achieved than he has originally assumed, seeing as the Sentinel is almost completely focused on a radiant Ran. Her eyes are shining and her cheeks flushed, her complexion accentuated by her sky blue beanie and scarf. She looks stunning, and her mind is a perfect reflection of how happy she feels. It shows a brilliant image of a winter day, crisp but not bitingly cold, white and sparkling, but not blindingly so. Kazuha's mood, in contrast, is a little subdued. The image of a winter meadow in her mind is rather shadowy, and there is a hint of fire in the air that she somehow projects. It's a faint smell; Shinichi doubts even Ran picked up on it, but that, coupled with Hattori's frown, tells him that yesterday didn't work out as hoped for the two of them.

"What's going on?" Shinichi asks, deciding to put the matter first. Hattori is at his best when his mind is clear, and currently that is not the case.

"Oh, it's no—" Hattori interrupts himself, shrinking under Shinichi's strict gaze. "Right, you're a Guide and usually know when something's bothering me, got the message," he grumbles instead, sighs, and then says, "Turns out you were right when you warned me about spending time with Hakuba. Kazuha wasn't pleased, at all. She says she can feel his influence on me, whatever that means. And it scares her, because there was more of him than of her on me, apparently. Which I just don't get. I spend lots of time around you, and that never happened. She never even noticed. Why does it happen with him? Isn't she making that up?"

"She isn't. A Sentinel doesn't feel it, but a Guide senses the influence of another Guide on a Sentinel's mind when he or she is linking their mind to them. It depends on how compatible the other Guide is with the Sentinel in question, however. You and Hakuba are at least as compatible as you and Kazuha.

“That's why his way of thinking and his way of Guiding, essentially, are noticeable on you. He probably instinctively balanced you when he was close. And especially since Kazuha uses very similar methods, she would have noticed. Have you never had someone explain that to you?" Shinichi asks.

"You know both of my parents are Neutrals," Hattori snaps.

"Right... And the centers aren't very open with their information if you refuse to register," Shinichi says. "Sorry, I know you tried to learn about it. They should really offer courses and free tests of status in elementary school."

"They should," Hattori agrees grimly. After a moment he asks, "Am I in trouble?"

"I'd have to check," Shinichi says calmly.

"Do it, then."

Shinichi carefully pushes his bond to the edge of his mind. It's unpleasant, since it has become stronger yet again and seems to take a part of him along, but he knows it will only be for a short while. He concentrates on Hattori, inspecting his wild, untamed mind with care. It's as much of a headache as always, with Hattori straining against Shinichi's structure. Their clashing ways of thinking are fighting for dominance. There is none of that effortlessness he has with KID.

It's easy to identify the influences of Kazuha and Hakuba, both. Kazuha's images, while less clear, carry an impression of smell with them, which is pretty rare in a Guide. It's much more difficult to evoke a smell in someone's imagination than an image, a sound, or a tactile impression. To be able to transmit it is exceptional, which makes her mind so interesting to Sentinels in general, and Hattori in particular. But the feeling of her is rivaled strongly by the clear and stunning images Hakuba uses to calm a Sentinel, and Shinichi can see that Hattori is leaning towards them both in equal measure. Currently, Kazuha outweighs Hakuba, but it's not by much. He pulls his senses back, taking refuge in his defined rhythm and the drifting sound of the Air's violins. The bond automatically shifts closer again.

"She's right to be mad. You've got as many precursors for a bond with him as with her," Shinichi says.

"Shit," Hattori curses.

"You've got two options," Shinichi tells him. He must have spent too much time with Haibara, he thinks, he starts to sound like her. "Either you distance yourself from him, or you bond with her. I know you like Hakuba as a friend, but you're in love with Kazuha, aren't you? If you don't decide and continue as you do now, you'll lose her. She is not studying here. At this rate, you're going to end up connected to him, even if you don't want to."

"Are you sure there's only the two options?" Hattori asks quietly, looking somewhat crushed.

"Positive. Accidental bonds are not to be underestimated," Shinichi confirms.

They walk in silence for a while, only the snow crunching beneath their feet. The children's happy shouts waft over from where they are walking with the rest of the group. They are stopped by some activists close to a small temple at the border of the park, handing out pamphlets. Shinichi watches as Ayumi's eyes grow large when the small bell of the temple begins to chime. Even Mitsuhiko, who tries his hardest to appear more grown up lately, breaks into a wide, enchanted smile. It's a beautiful sound, seemingly standing in the air long after the bell fell silent again.

"Is there a reason why you're waiting?" Shinichi finally asks, after they have moved on.

Hattori throws him a weak glare. "We're nineteen, Kudou. I wanted to be twenty, at least, before entering into such a commitment."

"It's not like it's absolutely irreversible. Even a Sentinel can live with a severed bond if they take some measures to learn self-control beforehand. No matter what the center says, that much is true. It's just difficult to learn, but it's not like you haven't, already," Shinichi reminds him.

"I know. Can you blame me for being scared, though?"

It's rare for Shinichi to witness Hattori this upset. It doesn't go unnoticed, either. He sees Kazuha in front of them turn around, worry etched on her face. Her eyes meet Hattori's, and he tries to give her a reassuring smile. She returns it uncertainly. Shinichi lets his music flow out and wrap around Hattori gently, soothingly, without smothering him. He keeps it up until the Sentinel feels focused to him again.

"I don't blame you. I just know what it feels like to lose something so precious to you to unfortunate circumstances," Shinichi says, voice low. "You're right to take your time, though. You should be as sure of your decision as you can be."

Hattori nods and says nothing. They trudge on a little further.

"I've got news about the case," Shinichi tells him when they enter a small grove. The kids are still blessedly entertained, but he thinks it won't last for long anymore.

"Why didn't you say so at once?" Hattori asks.

"This was important, too," Shinichi replies evenly, before giving his friend an update on what he knows.

He decided not to tell Hattori about all the concerned parties, claiming he learned about it via his contacts, letting Hattori make his own assumptions as to which contacts he is referring to. He and Kaito agreed on the latter using his guise again if needed, so it's easy to make up a different set of people. Hattori doesn't know Nakamori-san, and since Shinichi will leave the trailing of her to Kaito, there is no need to change that.

"That's terrible. There might be even more Sentinels without dangling bonds involved than just that one woman," Hattori gasps.

"I don't know. But it's possible," Shinichi agrees darkly. He has thought of that, but the whole idea appears much too risky to him.

"You don't think so?" Hattori presses.

"I can't imagine someone really taking so many chances. Sentinels that are unbonded and not yet fully online dying of a heart attack at a young age would be highly suspicious. The perp was at least a little more careful before," Shinichi says.

"Well, maybe they saw a chance to generate a different set of data with her. Besides, if your assumptions about her are correct, and she wanted to suppress her abilities at any cost, she does fit. They seem to be going only for those that are desperate."

"That's true," Shinichi agrees.

"Someone who's desperate not to bond, but incapable of controlling their abilities... There must be tons of people like that," Hattori muses.

Shinichi nods.

"But it's definitely not one person alone who coordinates this," Hattori finally says.

"What makes you think so?" Shinichi asks.

"Well, don't you think it's unlikely that one physician always gets access to those particular Sentinels? Most patients go to the center for a test, and, eventually, in order to find a match. Most jobs for the practitioners at the center revolve around counseling. That's why I thought we'd find our culprit within the group of people working with the patients with dangling bonds, specifically. The first group where incidents occurred, you know? But this isn't a case of a dangling bond, so it falls into a different section, doesn't it? How did the perp gain access to her, then? It makes sense to attribute this to several people, don't you think?"

"Maybe the doctor she is seeing works with both type of patients," Shinichi suggests, "but you're right, even then, it's more likely that we're dealing with a group of culprits. The spread is too large. Maybe they're getting more certain of their operation, or they're simply getting more careless. Maybe even nervous, seeing as the net closes in around them. They must be aware that the police is on their tracks. Maybe that makes them more desperate to finish their tests and complete their study."

Hattori nods. "And a desperate Sentinel, who's young and unwilling to bond because they're interested in someone they can't bond with is an ideal subject."

It really hits home, when Hattori says it, that the cause for Nakamori-san's current situation is probably her love for the Sentinel Shinichi is bonded to. The guilt he feels at this thought is intense enough that he has to take a steadying breath. He wonders how Kaito copes with it. He should probably reassure him when he gives him a call later on to inform him about Haibara's results.

"You're right. But we've also got to consider the possibility that the two incidents aren't even related, despite most likely concerning the same drug."

Hattori hums in agreement. "Yeah," he says. "Either way, we've got to do some more snooping around at the center."

It's then a very well aimed snowball hits Shinichi straight in the face, dislodging his glasses while dissolving into a gust of cold, powdery white.

"Ayumi-chan!" he squeaks, startled.

Rambunctious laughter echoes through the park, and the rest of their walk is spent in a haze of snowy projectiles and easy, thoughtless fun. Even if Shinichi didn't admit it before, it does him good. Sometimes he loathes just how Haibara is always right.



***



"So she confirmed it," Kaito states.

"Yes. Haibara is certain that Nakamori-san is given the same kind of drug the other Sentinels received," Shinichi replies.

There is a moment of silence at the other end of the line before he hears a low curse.

"We want to forward the results to the police, but..." Shinichi trails off.

"But that might expose not only me, but you, as well, to those who still can't know," Kaito completes for him.

"Essentially. I've got a way though, to hand it over to them through a secure channel. Someone who won't ask any questions. Are you alright with that?" Shinichi asks.

"Am I alright with that? And what if I say no? There are lives on the line, aren't there?" KID responds.

"It's not like I won't do it, anyway, but I thought maybe you had a different idea."

Kaito chuckles, but it's not a happy laugh. It's tinged with bitterness instead, and it doesn't suit him.

"No, I don't. KID suddenly sending around poison wouldn't quite fit into my resume, so I think using your connections is the best in this case. I'll be the useless bystander here, even though it's basically my fault."

"Don't blame yourself," Shinichi murmurs quietly.

"That's a little difficult, Shinichi," comes Kaito's voice over the phone.

It's thin and tinny, not doing his rich timbre justice. It feels cold, just like the once more deserted office of the agency. It's late already, and he has snuck downstairs again in order to talk to KID, away from the curious ears of his childhood friend.

Ran has been looking at him a little concerned all day, apparently feeling troubled by the space he is putting between them. It's not much different from the usual. Ever since she bonded, Shinichi has kept his distance, needing to hide the pain and deal with knowing she is unequivocally out of his reach. He has had a hard time giving up on her, and even if she still views him as Conan and isn't held back by the guilty conscience that keeps her from calling Shinichi as himself ever since, the strain on their relationship is undeniable.

"It's not your fault," Shinichi repeats, insecure whom exactly he is trying to convince.

"If this situation were reversed, you would not believe that either," KID says softly.

"No. I wouldn't. But I would be wrong. If it were Ran, she'd kick my ass for thinking that way," Shinichi replies.

He can't help the smile pulling at the corners of his mouth.

Kaito snorts. "Aoko probably has a mob designated for situations like that. She can't stand it when I try to decide what's best for her."

"It's meant well, but ultimately it's not a good trait to have," Shinichi sighs.

He remembers all too well how Ran grew distant, step by step, one month of Shinichi being gone at a time.

"Sometimes the decisions we make lead us into situations where we don't want others to follow, though," Kaito says.

"That's true. But it isn't our place to object if they want to."

Kaito hums. "Have you ever asked?"

"No," Shinichi says, "and that might have been the beginning of the end."

The static noise of the connection fills his ear as they grow silent.

Finally, Kaito asks, "So you think you've got to look into several people being involved in this at the center?"

"Yes. The doctor Nakamori-san works with might be someone other than the person who treated the people with the dangling bonds. It might still be good to question her about the person she's seeing, though. Do you think you could ask her about that?"

"I can't try to before next Tuesday, I think. The inspector and her traveled to the countryside this morning and won't be back until late on Sunday evening. I doubt I can catch her before she leaves for work on Monday without making her suspicious," Kaito says.

"Shit," Shinichi curses.

"We could trail her to the center. It might be the easiest way to uncover her physician and maybe get a chance to snoop," Kaito suggests.

"You're willing and capable of breaking into the center? They're pretty well guarded."

"What do you think, Meitantei?" Kaito purrs in a cadence that is clearly KID.

"Oh, don't brag," Shinichi snorts.

"Everything to uncover the truth for my darling Guide," comes the lilting answer, but there's is a serious undercurrent to it.

This isn't a game to KID.

"So we'll meet on Monday evening?" Shinichi sums up.

"Sound plan, detective."

"Perfect. I'll see you then," Shinichi says.

"Sleep tight, Shinichi," Kaito murmurs.

"Good night," Shinichi replies, hanging up with a strange feeling in his gut.

The bond is tingling again, and his Air has changed into a different song. It's a faint echo of the song he had stuck in his head when Kaito collected him from Hattori's home. He wonders if he is supposed to long for that feeling of lightness in his bones that was there when they flew over the city.



***



The next morning, Shinichi takes ten minutes to get his thoughts in order, before raising his barriers again. The Air is slow and constant today, no intermissions of other songs after a night of enough sleep. Good enough to tackle a conversation he has realized is long overdue.

"Ran-neechan?" he calls, entering the kitchen, where she is preparing breakfast.

She looks up at him with a smile.

"Conan-kun! You're up early for a holiday," she says.

"I'm all awake," he smiles, doing his best to be just as guileless and sunny as he always is in front of her.

"That's good. You looked quite tired yesterday after going to the park. No, actually, since before that. You've been stressed ever since that KID heist," she huffs.

Shinichi is a little troubled by how perceptive she is.

"I've had an issue with a boy at school. It's all good now," he lies.

It doesn't even truly register anymore; just one of countless things he has told her to get around uncomfortable explanations. He has stopped feeling guilty, he notices, probably because the punishment for his transgressions has been delivered already. He feels the happy contentment of a bond in the steadiness of her mind. She has always been composed, but with Araide-sensei, she is in perfect harmony with herself and the world around her. The sadness and worry Shinichi too often associated with himself are gone.

"I wanted to say sorry, Ran-neechan. I've been spending so much time away lately that we've hardly talked," he says, and he means it, too.

She looks surprised for a moment, then there is a flash of guilt, before she gives him another warm smile.

"Oh, Conan-kun. It's not your fault. I've been busy, too, you know? I've started to go to university, and I guess I'm spending a lot of time with Tomoaki-san. I'll be there for all of this weekend though, so why don't we go and do something fun together?"

"I'd love to! Maybe we can see a movie on Sunday evening?" Shinichi says.

"That sounds great," Ran replies with a smile.

Shinichi grins back at her. They finish the preparations together and sit down at the table. Mouri is still asleep upstairs, so the two of them start to eat ahead of him.

"I want to visit Haibara today and check if her head is better," Shinichi tells Ran around a mouthful of rice.

"Sure! It's nice of you to look out for your friend. I'll send along some porridge for Ai-chan," Ran agrees. "I'm going to take Kazuha-chan out for shopping today. She was a little depressed about something yesterday, I think."

Shinichi nods. "Say hi to her for me."

"I will," Ran replies, ruffling his hair.



***



After breakfast, feeling considerably lighter, Shinichi heads over to the professor's home. His phone vibrates on the way there. The snow is still falling, even heavier than yesterday, and the traffic has mostly come to a stop.

'You feel very content,' reads the message he has received.

The sender is listed as K, since Shinichi isn't willing to explain either, an extensive chat history with Kuroba Kaito, whom he has supposedly met just once, or Kaitou KID, whom he is supposed to catch.

'Talked to Ran,' he replies, 'went well. How're you?'

'Don't you know already?' comes the answer.

'No, because I'm not a nosy thief who can't stick to his own mind,' Shinichi sends back.

Amusement trickles across the bond.

'I can't resist closed off places,' reads the message, and the sound of a lock clicking reaches Shinichi's ears. It clearly has been sent by Kaito.

'Idiot. Don't break your lock picking set to create nice sounds,' Shinichi admonishes him.

'We both know I'm too skillful for that,' writes KID.

'And I'm too busy to listen to your bragging. I'll talk to you later,' Shinichi replies and closes his phone.

"I thought you'd be back today," Haibara greets him when he wanders into her lab.

She looks less tired than he expected.

"Your results were what you anticipated then?" he presumes.

"To a T. You've definitely found someone who's part of your case. Seems like those autopsy people did a pretty good job, too, since the report was spot-on for the most part. I'm sure they use the same concentration per pill and vary the dosage by number of pills taken per day. If your thief finds out exactly how many of those she needed, I can calculate the amount of agent she has had in her system."

"Didn't you say it decomposes quickly within the body?" Shinichi asks.

"Yes, it does, but if the dosage was too large, she might experience symptoms of withdrawal. Her senses will be returning to normal swiftly, but the effects on her body might be just as immediate," Haibara explains.

"That's a problem, since she's currently on a vacation and effectively out of reach for us. Is it critical?" Shinichi asks.

"No, mainly unpleasant, fortunately," Haibara replies, lifting an eyebrow, "but it could have been. What would you have done then?"

"I'm sure KID and I would have figured something out," Shinichi deflects, looking through the room.

He is not ready for her critical assessment of his actions. He knows she is not happy with them. He tightens his mental barriers and moves on.

"Is there something we could give a victim in case of a poisoning or for the withdrawal?" he asks.

"There is," Haibara agrees, holding up a small box of pills. "Those will lower the concentration of the agent in your blood almost immediately, by binding it. It then easily dissolves in water and can be filtered out by the kidneys. If the concentration remains low, it isn't necessary. In case of very high dosages it might help, though. If, for instance, someone took that stuff for, say, six weeks or more and began building up a tolerance. What you're looking at as cause of death is most likely an overdose, not exactly organ failure, as I assumed first."

She hands the box over. Her mind is firm today, blue-colored steel, hard, but not cutting.

"You're mad," Shinichi says.

"This is really dangerous. What they are using is a compound that has been discussed before in research. There's extensive documentation listing the risks. Look, the lab of this scientist has published seven papers on it, strongly discouraging its use. Especially since effectiveness starts to drop after a while, and, with rising dosage, the damages accumulate."

She hands him some printed sheets of paper. Shinichi skims the titles, which tell him very little. All the lists of authors conclude with a certain Shimomura Eiichi.

"That's the leader of that research group," Haibara says, when he points it out to her. "They describe that exact compound and the effects they observed on rats, which are identical to those we saw in the Sentinels that died from the drug. Minus, of course, the effect on the senses. There's no other animal known that displays Sentinel-Guide traits so far, after all."

"Do you think the perpetrators are aware of these?" Shinichi asks, lifting the papers.

"They must be. As I said, they use exactly the same combination of substances. I'm positive they even took it from here. It's too similar to be a coincidence."

"Maybe I should try to arrange a meeting with the researcher. They might have contacted him, trying to gather more information," Shinichi muses.

Shimomura is associated with Toudai. While getting an appointment might be difficult, at least a long trip isn't required.

"Hattori's attending Toudai as well, isn't he?"

Shinichi nods. So are Kaito and Hakuba. Not that he can mention this now.

"You could take him along. Might be easier for a student to arrange a meeting," Haibara suggests.

"Good idea," Shinichi says and takes out his phone in order to write a quick text to his friend.

Just when he puts it away, it vibrates in his palm. There is a message from Kaito with the weather report for Monday attached. They are warning about a blizzard.

'At least I'm in camouflage this time around. Are you going to wear a matching outfit, Guide-san?' the thief has tagged on to the information.

'In your dreams,' Shinichi shoots back.

When he looks up, he catches Haibara staring at him.

"What is it?" he asks, confused.

"You're smiling, Kudou. And I'm pretty sure what I'm listening to right now is a very energetic Celia Cruz. I didn't know you were into Latin sounds."

"I'm not," Shinichi groans, running a hand through his hair and trying to get the music to shift again.

It finally does, after putting some effort into it.

"So I take it the strictly temporary bonding is going well?" Haibara asks, raising a brow at him, again.

For some reason, this doesn't seem to concern her in the least, however. On the contrary, she is clearly more relaxed now. The silky strands of her mind are sparkling again, like fresh leaves in spring catching the first rays of the sun.

"It isn't. We're dealing with it in a pragmatic fashion, that's all. What about that situation is so amusing to you, exactly?" Shinichi snaps, annoyed.

"Only he fact that you're so relaxed when you're reading messages from your so-called rival you lower your shields. And that he's taking the offered entering promptly, too. Your bond is strengthening, isn't it?"

"Well, it's got to, otherwise we can't exactly separate, can we?" Shinichi replies, fighting off the irritation he feels at her smugness.

Haibara sighs. "Actually, it only needs to stabilize, it doesn't have to grow stronger. All you need is the option to close off your mind without hurting the other. You aren't there yet, are you?"

Shinichi shakes his head.

"With the two of you, you won't get there without the bond growing. You're very attuned to each other already. So the isolation of your minds will be taxing. The longer it goes, the harder it gets. I've got no idea when and how you're going to separate, but I can already tell you that time is against you. You might be stuck with each other for a long while." She is completely serious now, the light mood gone for good.

"That's not going to happen. We didn't want this bond, and he's in love with somebody else. We'll find a way to separate quickly," Shinichi bites back.

"And you are not? In love with someone else, that is?" Haibara asks him skeptically.

Shinichi starts.

"That was low," he whispers.

"I just wanted to get you to realize that bonding, or staying bonded with someone, isn't about where your affection lies. You can be tied to someone you hate and yet unable to do a thing about it. And I'm not saying," she continues, holding up her hand and preempting his protests, "that's going to happen to you. Or that you hate each other, even, because I don't think you do. But maybe you should focus on this fact more, instead of only thinking about severing the bond. And maybe you have to make sure you're not getting sucked into his pace too much. It's still dangerous to get too close, even now."

Shinichi doesn't know what to say to that.

"That's not something I wanted to hear," he mumbles.

"But you needed to. Whatever you're going to do, Kudou, don't act rashly. There's a very real chance a forced, quick separation will hurt you both, up to truly forming a dangling bond. But on the other hand, you might miss your chance. Keep that in mind."

There is a certain finality to her words. It comes as a relief to Shinichi, who takes it as his cue to turn around and leave, the pills she gave him earlier clutched in his hands.



***



Friday and Saturday pass in a blur, leaving Shinichi exhausted and his nerve endings raw. His talk with Haibara hasn't been designed to quieten his worries. Quite on the contrary, Shinichi finds it increasingly harder to slip into his easy, steady rhythm and to keep his barriers up. His Air is always on the verge of shifting into something else, a more confusing, unsettling melody, a wild, irregular beat, and his mind screams at him to lean into the comfort of the bond at its back.

But Shinichi can't. He asked Kaito on Friday morning to keep the connection closed, directly after asking Jodie-sensei to pass on the information Haibara, KID, and him have gathered. Haibara tends to be correct with her predictions, and if she says the thief and him will have a hard time separating, that is probably the case. He still can't help but think she is wrong in her assumption that increasing the distance between them will help, though. All it does, so far, is leaving Shinichi unstable and distraught, without the bond showing even the smallest sign of shrinking or growing weaker.

By the time Sunday evening comes around, he is so tired that Ran asks him worriedly if he even feels up to keeping their engagement of going to the cinema. Shinichi assuages her concerns quickly. He really wants to go, especially because Ran is bringing Araide-sensei. He still has to show her that he will always be glad to have both, her and her Sentinel, around. Even as Conan, he is no longer an overly jealous, seventeen-year-old. He is going to be twenty next year, and it's time to move on.

That is how the three of them find themselves in the dark theater, watching the commercials right before the movie Ran chose begins. It's a film with rather good reviews, so Shinichi is moderately excited for it. He wonders when exactly Ran decided that he was old enough to go and watch something different than Gomera movies with her. It's refreshing.

The atmosphere in the room is full of happy expectation, though Shinichi notices there are some other emotions within the mix that are not quite as relaxed and joyful as you might expect on a Sunday evening. Through the thin shields of his Air, flickering in and out of existence as if he tried to listen to it via a bad internet connection on a train, Shinichi can feel anger, disappointment, and nervousness layered into the positive sentiments surrounding him.

As he looks around, scanning the heads of the audience for any suspicious people, he catches Ran's eyes. She smiles at him.

"Can you see everything, Conan-kun?" she asks kindly.

"Yes, I'm good. Thank you, Ran-neechan," he replies, grinning back.

"I hope you won't find today's movie too boring. I wasn't sure whether you'd be interested in a biographical story this serious, but you seemed to like historical films," she says, reaching over for the popcorn that is stored between them.

Araide-sensei next to her takes her hand and laughs.

"Ran, you don't need to worry so much over Conan-kun. He's more than capable of voicing his opinions," he says and gives Shinichi another kind smile.

Shinichi feels how Ran relaxes at his touch. Her barrier, an image of the clear blue sky and the sun on your skin, warms up even more.

"Yes, I can do that," Shinichi grins, mentally leaning into the warmth of Ran to gain some peace of mind.

Araide-sensei chuckles and turns his attention back to the screen. A couple of minutes pass, and the movie is just about to start when the atmosphere within the cinema hall suddenly sours. Shinichi and Ran both look up in confusion and alarm at the sudden panic that fills the room. Araide-sensei, who is a Sentinel with keen ears, turns around swiftly. Shinichi follows his eyes and is out of his seat in a heartbeat, flying over to the last row of the hall, where a girl starts screaming at the very same moment while the boy next to her just collapses in on himself. Even without reaching him, Shinichi already knows he is dead. Araide-sensei arrives before he can get to the man and begins with the reanimation, while Shinichi calls for the police and an ambulance. The man isn't even thirty from the looks of it, so it's a safe bet that foul play has been involved.

About half an hour later the only people left in the cinema hall are the girlfriend of the victim and a couple the both of them were close friends with, as well as the usual cast of division one of the Metropolitan Police, Ran, Araide-sensei, and Shinichi.

"He was already acting a little weird when we got here," the girlfriend is saying.

Her make-up is running all over her face, and Shinichi feels for her. She is a Neutral, but her emotions are intense enough to make him shudder. The pain she is in is endless. Shinichi doesn't think for a moment she could have done anything to the man who died tonight. He clearly has been the most important thing in her life.

The two girls who stand next to her, one a Sentinel, the other a Guide, try to console her. Both are shell-shocked, unable to come to terms with what happened. At a cursory glance, it's hard to find a suspect for the crime.

"Could you walk us through what happened, once you arrived at the cinema?" Megure asks the girlfriend gently, while Takagi takes notes.

She sobs but nods, trying her best to keep her voice steady.

"He was nervous. He's been twitching a lot, lately. I've started noticing it about two months ago. I told him that maybe he needed to go see a doctor, because I didn't know what was going on."

Shinichi notices how the friend of hers who is a Guide shuffles her feet. His eyes narrow in on her. She looks conflicted and worried, and even through her barriers, he can feel a guilty conscience.

"He did actually see one, and afterwards it got better for a bit. He was in a really good mood, too. When I asked him what it had been about, he said he just lacked some vitamins. But during the last week, something changed again. His mood became really bad at times, and at others he would just sleep all day. I thought he'd caught a cold and even asked him if he wanted to stay at home tonight, but he said he'd be fine! When we came here, he was awfully pale already, and he couldn't sit still. He went to the toilet during the commercials, and was completely out of breath when he came back. And then he-"

She sobs again, burying her face in her hands. The Guide steps closer and hugs her, pulling the desperate girl into her arms.

"He started to spasm and then collapsed," the Sentinel completes the story in a low, pain-tinged whisper.

Shinichi looks up at Satou, who is scrutinizing the Guide, having noticed her shifting, as well. She addresses her in a firm manner that tolerates no excuses.

"Miss, we're trying to solve a case. It would be very useful to us if you stopped withholding information."

The girl looks at her with huge, brown eyes. Her friends turn to her in shock, the girlfriend of the victim stepping away hurriedly.

"Do you have anything to do with this, Kei?" she asks weakly.

"No! I don't! It's not what you think," the Guide answers, panicked.

Shinichi can see her rearrange her sentiments like collecting items that fell out of an overly stuffed shopping back. She straightens and looks at Satou.

"I'm not sure this has anything to do with it. But I suspect that Tomohiro-san was coming online as a Sentinel." She turns to his girlfriend. "I'm sorry, Nao, I didn't want to tell you."

"But I'm a Neutral," Nao whispers.

Her Sentinel friend behind her is covering her mouth in terror.

"Yes, I know. That's why," Kei says, averting her eyes.

Shinichi moves away from them to where the victim's belongings are stored in plastic bags and begins to rifle through them haphazardly, ignoring Ran's exasperated calling of his name. He discovers a small box that rattles suspiciously. Takagi reaches him at this point and gently pries the bag from his hand. He opens it and shakes the box into his gloved hands, lifting the lid carefully. He is considerate enough to do so while kneeling, so Shinichi can look over his shoulder. What he gets to see is a familiar red-and-white cellulose capsule.

"Oh heavens help us," Satou murmurs from behind them.

Chapter 12: Vivace

Notes:

Hi once again,
we made it through another week, and I'm here with a new chapter! As promised, we're back to Kaito's POV, and more things happen. I can't wait to hear what you think! I want to thank you, again and again, for reading, kudosing and commenting. It's such a joy to have you all with me and to see you lending this story a bit of your time.

Chapter Text

By Monday, Kaito feels drained. Both, Aoko and Shinichi, have been weirdly reticent over the weekend, and it doesn't sit right with him. The bond in the back of his mind is there, pulling and pushing at him to give it space. Kaito tries his best to ignore it, mostly because Shinichi told him to. In a message from Friday evening, he informed Kaito that he arranged for his contacts to pass on the pills to the police. He also told him not to overuse their connection anymore. Kaito didn't expect it to leave him as restless and unsatisfied as it does.

His constant worries about Aoko don't help him calm down, either. At this point, he goes to bed with it being the last thing on his mind, and it greets him first thing in the morning, like not even his hunt for Pandora does these days. The worst part is not knowing what is going on and being unable to do anything. He tried to reach her on her phone, but the answers to his texts were always short. She wouldn't take any calls, claiming it was a bad time.

Shinichi has asked him to look into the amount of pills she takes per day. It's difficult to say though, most of all since Kaito really only has today as reference. In order to find out, he rigged the lid of the jar to know when she opens it, but it seems she retrieved several pills at once, since his mechanism got triggered only one time. He can't tell how many of those capsules she takes, or when she does it. Shadowing her during her day at work didn't provide him with more information, since he can't be everywhere, and she is rather discreet about it. She looked a little pale and shaky, however, and that didn't serve to put him at ease, exactly.

The rhythm of his mind is all over the place today. He has been trying to steady it, drumming away on every available surface, but it has been to no avail. In the end, he reached out for the bond, dejected and exhausted, only to remember that Shinichi had asked him not to. To his surprise, however, he found it opening instantly, his Guide holding out an imaginary hand for him to grab onto. He has been calmer ever since, even now, as he sits in his living room, staring at the ceiling and wondering why he finds it so hard to get a grip. Difficult situations are nothing new to him, and he mostly manages just fine. Why is he so helpless now?

It's a rhetorical question. Kaito knows it's mostly the interference he receives from the bond itself. On a logical level, he is aware that it's taxing for both, his body and his mind, to settle around the connection. It was easier when he could exchange messages with Shinichi. He senses that parts of him need to be with his Guide in order to calibrate. Every reaction to getting near Shinichi has been resoundingly positive. Kaito can still identify exactly where they have touched, where Shinichi pressed his palm to his neck to calm him down, where he placed his hand on top of Kaito's, even how it felt wrapped into his own.

But on an emotional level, it's simply bewildering how it doesn't bother him to let somebody else in. Usually, Kaito likes to keep his distance, too easily overwhelmed by the sensations of close contact. With Shinichi, it feels natural not to. His body seems okay with it, his Sentinel-part is on board, but it's his heart that keeps screaming at him how this is wrong, and he shouldn't let the detective get behind his defenses. His head, the unhappy go-between of the two, tries to argue for simply getting it over with, whichever way works best.

The doorbell rings at that very moment, conveniently dragging Kaito from his thoughts. He gets up to open it, checking his watch while he walks. It's only a quarter past five, so they have more than enough time to discuss some of these things before setting off for the center.

Shinichi waits patiently on the other side, looking approximately how Kaito feels: pale, a little sleep-deprived, and nervous. He raises his head and meets Kaito's gaze. Kaito gets the weird feeling of how their inner walls rise and tighten in stereo, only to collapse spectacularly at the very next second, snapping them instantly into synchronicity. It's like missing a whole flight of stairs, only to find that you are already on solid ground.

"Damn it," Shinichi curses, as the melody of a Spanish ballad settles in their minds.

Kaito moves silently aside and lets the detective in. The other takes off his shoes and his jacket and stores them away neatly. He avoids looking Kaito in the eyes again. Kaito can't stand it anymore.

"Listen, I'm aware this isn't an ideal situation, but is there a reason you've been so withdrawn these past days?" he asks.

He doesn't mean for it to come out quite as sharply as it does, but on the other hand, Shinichi has access to his emotions, so pretending wouldn't really have helped, anyway. Shinichi looks up in surprise.

"I thought you knew," he says.

"Know what? You'll have to be a little more specific, because I'm no mind reader. That's more up your alley," Kaito replies tersely.

Shinichi appears to be stunned for a moment. Then he shakes his head.

"Let's take this to the living room," he says.

They settle in two armchairs opposite of each other, both avoiding the couch.

"So," Shinichi starts, after a moment of collecting his thoughts, "as a Sentinel, how does the bond feel to you?"

Kaito doesn't need to think long on that. "Strong and unsteady. It's distracting, even if I can open and close the connection now. It feels like I'm out of balance."

"Yes. The last part is because the bond hasn't settled yet. But it's the first part that's the problem. The stronger the bond, the harder it is to separate. And our bond is strengthening disproportionately quickly."

"You're saying we might not be able to separate if we get too close too quickly," Kaito sums up.

Shinichi nods.

Kaito tilts his head, feeling doubtful. "As far as I know, it's always possible to separate. It's just a matter of how long it will take."

"Yes. But that could be years, which you don't want to spend tied to me, do you? So the best solution is for me to keep my distance," Shinichi replies.

"But this isn't working for me," Kaito says with conviction. It isn't.

"It isn't for me, either," Shinichi admits after a moment, looking incredibly exhausted.

His eyes are downcast, his dark lashes fanning out over his pale skin, and Kaito has to restrain himself from reaching out. The bond is tugging at him viciously.

"We both know that in order for this to settle, we need contact. And we have to get it to settle. I know it's a gamble, but as I see it, prolonged phases without contact are just as bad as getting too close. They'll stretch out this period and make it even harder to hit the correct time slot for separating," Kaito tells the detective.

Shinichi's eyes finally find his. There's doubt in them now, too. "Are you willing to take a risk like that? I thought you would be the one most interested in severing this as fast as possible."

"Are you saying you've been trying to keep away, to close yourself off, for me?" Kaito asks quietly.

Shinichi doesn't answer that question, opting to study his hands instead. Kaito huffs.

"Shinichi, we're in this situation mainly because of me!"

"We aren't. If it's anyone's fault it's mine," the detective argues back.

Kaito sighs and shakes his head, changing strategies. "It isn't. Listen, we can't spend all our time determining who is guilty of what and who isn't. This isn't about blame. We are in this together, and we won't get out of it unless we work with each other and with this bond. I am well aware I'm the last person you'd like to tie yourself to in such an intimate way, and yes, I... I wish it were a different person this close to me. But that doesn't mean we can simply pretend our minds are not connected. Ignoring it won't solve it. We're not giving either of us room by staying apart. It's a good idea, but it won't work."

"What's your proposal then?" Shinichi asks calmly, gaze never wavering from Kaito's now.

"I say we try more contact, not less. Being closer, leaving the connection open, touching skin to skin, until I can go about my day again without sudden resonances or tempo changes." Kaito gets up and sits down on the couch demonstratively, holding out his hand. "What do you say?"

Shinichi sighs, gets up, and moves around the table as well. He takes a seat next to Kaito at a carefully calculated distance. It's closer than Kaito thought he would settle down, but there is still space between them. Shinichi takes his offered hand and shakes on the agreement. It feels as if a static shock goes through the two of them, only instead of hurting, it leaves Kaito calm, composed, and clear. Shinichi looks away from him with a faint blush on his cheeks. He colors easily, Kaito notices, and it seems like he never knows what to do about it. It's oddly charming.

All of a sudden, however, Shinichi's body goes rigid as his eyes snap to the title page of the newspaper on the coffee table. He picks it up swiftly and shakes it out. It's a free one that always gets shoved into Kaito's mailbox. He never really reads it, preferring to check his phone for information, instead. The stories usually are regional and of little importance, like the one he can see on the back about a local temple within the Haido Park that is threatened to lose its bell, or way too sensational to provide any valuable news.

"Shinichi?" Kaito tries, scooting a little closer to read along.

The cushions are too soft, making him sink in deeper than he would like, his thigh brushing against Shinichi's smaller one. The couch is better for lounging around on than for sitting. Shinichi doesn't seem to mind, though. He is absorbed in the article. Kaito can practically taste the tension radiating from him.

"Is something wrong?" he asks, putting a hand on the other's forearm, eventually getting him to look up.

"There might be trouble," Shinichi says sternly.

"What happened?" Kaito asks.

Shinichi passes him the paper and Kaito scans it quickly.

'New drug for Sentinels in circulation?!' the headline reads. Kaito frowns. According to the article, there has been a sudden, inexplicable death of a young, unbound Sentinel on Sunday evening. He was first suspected to have been murdered, but that was ruled out by the police after a short, thorough investigation. Blood tests, however, revealed he must have been poisoned by a novel kind of drug that acts on a Sentinel, exclusively. The purpose and exact effect of said drug isn't known to the author, as of the time of publication.

"It's related to Aoko's case," Kaito states, connecting the dots quickly.

"It's the same kind of drug," Shinichi says.

"How do you know?"

"I was there. I went to the cinema with Ran on Sunday."

"How did he die?" Kaito asks quietly.

"He had a heart attack," Shinichi says. "They first thought one of his friends might have killed him, but sometimes it just isn't murder. We checked for medication within his belongings after one of his friends said she suspected he came online as a Sentinel recently. That turned out to be true. We found a patient's ID from the center later on, but the counselor who's responsible for him wasn't listed on it. And he didn't tell anybody about it, so we know nothing."

"Why did he take that risk?"

"His girlfriend is a Neutral. I think he really loved her and thought he couldn't stay with her, unless he found a way to suppress his Sentinel side."

"Shit," Kaito curses.

"Do you think Nakamori-san has seen this?" Shinichi asks, pointing towards the paper.

"Not likely. Usually she only reads the weekly paper her dad gets, or checks her phone for important news. I doubt this made it into the top ten, seeing as it's just one regional case," Kaito replies.

Shinichi nods. "She won't be worried or suspicious if that's so. But if she really sees one of the doctors responsible for this, they might be. I'd feel uneasy, letting her go on her own. We'll have to get close to her in order to make sure she's safe."

"I've bugged her this morning when she stopped by to bring me some food for lunch. We can follow her as soon as we hear her leave and then bump into her at the center."

"We need a reason to go there," Shinichi throws in.

"Let's tell her we want to get you tested early, because you've shown signs of coming online," Kaito suggests.

"She can't see me, though. She knows Hakuba, who knows Hattori, who shouldn't learn about our connection."

"Then she won't see you," Kaito replies, a devious grin stretching across his lips.



***



At ten minutes to six, Kaito sits in the waiting area of the center, accompanied by a very cute miniature version of himself. Shinichi has dubbed it the laziest costume Kaito has ever come up with, which is simply not true. Kaito even told him as much, claiming some of his own 'Shinichi' disguises had been much less time-consuming in their creation, and also that he couldn't be blamed for Shinichi's only disguise as a kid being a pair of oversized glasses. At least, they changed his clothes, throwing together a couple of things they found at a thrift shop they passed by.

Shinichi is playing on his phone with enthusiasm, or rather, he is pretending to. Kaito does the same, albeit in a more bored fashion. He is pretty sure they are giving off the vibe of a bored older brother taking the younger one to be tested.

'She's here,' Kaito types into his messenger app.

'Is she heading to the same waiting area?' Shinichi texts back. There are two, but anybody is free to choose where they want to sit.

'Yes,' Kaito replies quickly, after checking on her pattern of movement.

They don't have to wait for long. Aoko appears at the entrance, a little distracted, as Kaito notices, looks around for an empty seat, and finally lays eyes on them.

"Kaito! What are you doing here?" she asks, surprised.

Kaito mirrors the expression back at her.

"Oh, Aoko. I didn't know you had an appointment today. If you told me before, I could have sent the brat along with you," he says.

"Don't be rude! Who is the little guy?" Aoko chastises him, before turning to Shinichi.

"Hi. I'm Hori Touya. Kaito-niisan is my cousin," Shinichi introduces himself.

Kaito has to bite back a laugh. Shinichi clearly isn't comfortable with the lie, but he does his best to not let it show, meeting Aoko's gaze with a shy smile. It immediately gets to her. Kaito can practically hear her melt.

"So cute!" she coos, and her hands twitch, as if she has to resist the urge to ruffle Shinichi's already messed up hair, before saying, "I'm Nakamori Aoko, this mean guy's neighbor."

"We're here because I get those weird feelings all the time," Shinichi proceeds innocently, eyes wide and childish.

"Are you a Guide, Touya-kun?" Aoko asks admiringly.

"I don't know," Shinichi replies, shaking his head endearingly.

Kaito finds it surprisingly entertaining and even somewhat adorable, too, if he is honest. His hands start to twitch as well, but he keeps fiddling with his phone diligently.

"That's so early," Aoko says.

It is, indeed, but Kaito has been getting his first flashes of what his senses would be at an even earlier age, and Shinichi has told him it was the same for him, so coming online young isn't unheard of.

"That's why we wanted to get it tested. Make sure it's, uh, not an unusual development," Kaito replies, making a short pause pretending to formulate the answer in a way that won't sound too scary to his supposed cousin.

Aoko's eyes soften. They are gentle and sky-blue, light and bright. When he looks down and catches the midnight colored stare of his Guide, he isn't sure which he prefers. His Sentinel senses have him all over the place.

"Why are you here, Aoko-onee-san?" Shinichi asks, curious and inconspicuous, pulling Kaito from his musings.

"I've got weird flashes, as well," Aoko answers without hesitation, though Kaito notes she looks a bit weary, "but for me it's my eyes and my ears, not my feelings."

"So you're a Sentinel? That's so cool! I want to be a Sentinel, too," Shinichi exclaims, which earns them a few indulgent glances from the other people waiting in the room.

Sentinels are admired, after all, their sharpened perception invaluable in many fields of work. Almost every little boy dreams of being a Sentinel, even with the draw-backs that status tends to have, since almost no one learns how to properly control it.

"But being a Guide is much better, Touya-kun. You can feel what other people feel and help them when they're unwell. That's really cool, too. And besides," she goes on, smiling wistfully, "you'll be able to live without a bond, if you don't want one. Sentinels cannot do that."

Kaito feels his heart clench at her words. Regret and guilt churn in his stomach.

Shinichi moves closer to him unconsciously, and a gentle sensation comes through the their bond, as the other says, "I'm sure you can learn to live with it, too, if you don't want to bond. Those feelings are weird, but when I concentrate really hard on something else, it doesn't bother me so much."

Aoko's face shows a hint of surprise for just a second, and then she smiles.

"That's really good for you, Touya-kun, but I'm sure you'll be growing up to be a fantastic Guide, and somewhere out there is a Sentinel who will be really sad if they don't get to meet you and be with you."

Kaito can't keep looking at her.

Shinichi is standing close to him, but they aren't touching, all the space between them carefully calculated to give them both the illusion of a choice. The bond that radiates worry in the back of Kaito's head tells a different story. It's nearly impossible not to lean into it, to take comfort in it, and yet, it leaves him only feeling worse, feeling a traitor to the girl in front of him, who tries so hard. He is saved from the situation, when Aoko glances at the clock on the wall above them.

"I've got to go, but I'll see you afterwards. I'm sure I won't take long," she says to Kaito with a smile, before she disappears down the corridor.

Kaito and Shinichi fall silent, both focusing on her retreating figure without exchanging another word. It's easy for Kaito to pick out Aoko's familiar steps, even though he can hear a cacophony of different sounds around them. There are two people gossiping in presumably a break room, a coffeemaker in the background, people hurrying through other corridors, the people in the waiting area murmuring to each other, faint noises of patients and doctors talking. Still, with Shinichi by his side, concentration comes easy. He follows Aoko through the building, one flight up, down one corridor until she reaches a door, knocks, and enters. Then there is a silence. He thinks at first that the room is properly soundproofed, as it should be to guarantee privacy in a building that attracts people like Kaito, but Shinichi immediately clasps his hand and wordlessly pulls him into the corridor Aoko went through before. As soon as they are out of sight, he breaks into a run.

"Something's wrong. We've got to get to her. She's in shock and starting to zone," he hisses.

Kaito doesn't wait for further explanations. He swoops down, lifts Shinichi, who doesn't even complain at being manhandled, to his chest, and rushes up the stairs and along the hallway within seconds. They don't need to rely on any kind of additional senses to find Aoko. She is plainly visible as soon as they turn around the corner hiding the corridor from the staircase. She is sitting on the floor, eyes wide, fixed on a point within the room she was about to enter. The door stands open, blocked by Aoko's legs. Her mouth is twisted into a soundless scream.

Shinichi's Guide abilities flare up. The hallway is filled with the sound of him. It's not the Air, nor is it the ballad from before, it's a much more dramatic piece. It pushes through Aoko's shattered mind and startles her from the petrified state she has been in.

"Close your eyes," Shinichi says to her, and the authority in his voice, paired with the force of his mind, makes Kaito shudder and obey, even though he knows it's not him Shinichi is talking to.

It takes him a moment to pry his lids apart again and finally set Shinichi down to the ground. They are standing right behind Aoko, who is shaking like a leaf in a storm. Shinichi puts his hands on her shoulders, steadying her as she starts to sob. His eyes are trained on the scene within the room.

Kaito feels the blood drain from his face. It's a simple office, a desk in the back with a couple of chairs in front of it. There is a cot in the corner and shelves full of medical equipment, books, and pills lined up along the walls. In the center of the room lies a man, his face turned to them, eyes wide, bulging out and unseeing, skin purple, neck scratched bloody. There is the indentation of a thin wire that someone must have wrapped around it and then pulled tight until the man ran out of blood and, eventually, air.

Shinichi touches Kaito's hand and leads it to Aoko's shoulder, asking Kaito to look after her without words. Kaito nods.

"Scan the room. Maybe you pick up on something I'd miss," Shinichi says to him, before going inside.

He moves carefully across the carpeted floor, choosing a roundabout route to the body, and he is right to. Kaito can see the soft outlines of footprints. Unfortunately, a lot of people have entered the office today, not to mention the man who works in it himself going in and out a couple of times, so even the police's Sentinels will have a tough job identifying the patterns.

Shinichi arrives at the body, feeling for his pulse first, though he clearly doesn't expect much of it.

"Still warm," he says. "Rigor mortis has not yet set in. Can't have been long. Maybe under an hour."

Kaito nods, still sorting through the room. The glass doors of the cabinets are closed, but he notices that the things within have been moved. The desk is in disarray. Judging from the overall state of the room, that is unusual for the man working there. Patient files are scattered across the surface, holding notes he took during the counseling, if the chicken scratch Kaito can discern is anything to go by. The work ID next to the mouse pad identifies the man as Yamada Hiroshi, Guide and Counselor with the SGO.

"The office has been searched in a hurry," Shinichi says.

Kaito agrees. Shinichi moves over to the desk, scanning across the papers.

"Records of patients," he says.

"Kaito," Aoko whimpers, coming back to her senses, and Kaito turns to her.

She keeps her eyes closed, still not able to break the compulsion.

"It's okay, Aoko, you're alright," Kaito reassures her.

"Yamada-sensei is..." she starts, but can't get the words out, lower lip quivering.

"Nakamori-san," Shinichi pipes up, moving closer, "do you carry a cellphone?"

As he touches her hand gently, her eyes snap open and focus on him, confused, but a little calmer. She nods.

"Would you mind calling the police? I'm afraid Yamada-sensei has been murdered."

Aoko blanches a little more, but she nods again, getting up on shaky legs and making her way over to the window at the end of the corridor, already dialing.

"Let's go," Shinichi whispers to Kaito, and the both of them dive back into the office.

Shinichi takes on the desk, snapping photos with his own phone, as Kaito tackles the shelves holding medication, looking for a familiar type of pill.

"There's nothing here," he mumbles, scanning the different boxes.

"He might not have kept it here, at all. Perhaps he only carried small dosages and handed them off to the patients directly," Shinichi suggests.

It's possible, but Kaito can't help but feel that is not the case. His eyes latch onto the bookshelf next to the one he is going through. While the medication has clearly been moved around, as the patterns in the dust show, this shelf remained mostly untouched. Kaito almost moves right past it, when a narrow, unnaturally straight line on the top of a row of books catches his eyes. Curious, he moves closer, producing a handkerchief from thin air out of habit, and tentatively pulls on the back of the outermost volume. There is a faint click and the spines of the row of tomes move. What appears to be a a series of books instead is revealed to be a hidden box.

The pills they are looking for are still inside.

"Found it!" Kaito says triumphantly.

Shinichi is by his side instantly.

"How?" he asks.

"Small gouge on the top."

"Visible for everyone?"

"Possibly, if they looked carefully. Most probably, if they were a Sentinel."

Shinichi smiles grimly.

"Well, that does tell us something about the killer, if this was indeed what they were after. Now we only need to make sure the police learns the same."



***



Kaito, at this point, is fairly familiar with Shinichi's deduction methods. It doesn't make it any less impressive how he carefully walks the police through the evidence, making sure they take note of the patients' files that were tampered with and discover the secret depot of medication Kaito found earlier. He is not exactly inconspicuous, though, and Aoko sends Kaito questioning glances all the while. He will have to come up with some sort of cover story later on, but now is not the time to worry about it.

"According to his schedule, Yamada-sensei had three appointments after the break he took in the afternoon at about four, where he was still seen alive by you," says a man who introduced himself as inspector Shiratori.

Upon arriving, he instantly asked Shinichi if he and Edogawa Conan were related in any way. Kaito is rather disappointed at how easy it can be to deceive people, when Shiratori immediately believed Shinichi's denial.

Currently, the inspector is addressing two doctors who work at the center, as well. Ito-sensei, a woman somewhere in her forties, exuding the resolute air of a seasoned Guide who is not to be trifled with, pushes the side of her sleek, short bob behind her right ear. Kaito notices rather expensive earrings, precious stones glittering in the light.

"Yamada-sensei kept his appointments strictly private, inspector. As you're well aware, as medical professionals we're supposed to honor the confidentiality of our patients, which is even more critical at centers, since people wish for their status to remain hidden at times. He didn't talk to us about any of them."

Next to her, Nakano-sensei shuffles nervously. She is much younger than Ito, and her brown eyes behind dark wire frames twitch constantly from inspector Shiratori to Kaito and then back again. She is a Sentinel, Kaito observes, when she turns at the low hum from the lighting in the hallway being switched on.

"Did he say something to you he didn't mention to Ito-sensei, Nakano-sensei?" Shinichi asks innocently, watching her with wide eyes.

He looks and sounds incredibly enticing, Kaito thinks, his Guide abilities simmering underneath the surface, lacing his voice ever so slightly. Ito-sensei narrows her eyes a little, but Nakano-sensei is already answering his question.

"He did mention that some of his appointments were not with patients, but rather with associates from some companies."

"Well, yes, he did, now that you bring it up," Ito-sensei says acerbically, "which is perfectly fine. We all need to keep up with the recent developments in research to give the best treatment to our patients."

"Was Yamada-sensei someone who used cutting-edge treatments a lot?" inspector Shiratori asks.

"He was rather - innovative," Ito-sensei replies, her tone a little pinched.

Shinichi's eyes flash at her response, and Kaito wonders what he picked up on with his empathic abilities.

"As far as I'm aware, many doctors at the center are specialized in treating a certain group of patients. Is that true for the three of you, too?" Shiratori continues.

"Yes. Nakano-sensei is specialized in helping Guides to utilize their abilities. I did the same for Sentinels," Ito-sensei says.

"Our work is more focused on helping in the practical sense," Nakano-sensei adds, "we don't hand out pills or strictly stick to counseling. Instead, we show a Guide or a Sentinel, how they can help their potential bonded one coping with certain situations. How to strengthen and work with the bond, basically."

"And what did Yamada-sensei do?" Shiratori asks unrelentingly.

"Well, he was specialized in Sentinels without a bond. He used a mixture of medical treatment and counseling to help them deal with their senses," Ito-sensei finally answers.

She doesn't look very happy about it.

"I assumed these kinds of treatments to be largely abolished after the chaos with Sene," Kaito pipes up, unable to keep himself from mentioning it.

Aoko next to him looks slightly shaken.

"Only Sene has been taken off the market. Alternative forms of drugs that don't rely on suppressing the senses in the same way as Sene did are allowed," Nakano-sensei says quietly.

She clearly isn't comfortable with it.

"Ito-sensei, would you mind speaking more candidly?" Shiratori finally sighs. "I'm under the impression there's something you neglect to mention."

Ito-sensei's eyes stray to the boxes of medication on the shelf. She straightens her posture, resolve coming from her in waves. Her mental barriers are still up, which keeps him as a Sentinel from catching what her mind looks like, but he wonders if Shinichi can pierce through them. Probably, he thinks; there are few Guides who can keep the detective out.

"You must understand," Ito-sensei begins, "that the center is divided on the use of chemical drugs, especially with regard to Sentinels, but also Guides with a particularly high sensitivity to the emotional climate around them. Even when Sene was still on the market, there was a huge faction within the Sentinel-Guide-Organization that insisted on treating debilitating effects of enhanced senses by either finding a match to balance it out, or using milder medication, counseling, even therapy to help the person in question cope with it. It's difficult for many people to exercise an adequate amount of control over their senses, but it's not impossible."

"That does contradict the common perception," Shiratori points out.

"Obviously. When Sene was first discovered, many people considered it the quick, easy solution to the problem of zoning Sentinels. From an economic point of view, Sentinels are incredibly interesting, because they can do many jobs a Neutral or a Guide cannot do, with their sharp perception. Hence, there's always been a huge interest in keeping Sentinels functional, and never has there been an opportunity to do so at such a low cost and in so little time as with Sene."

She shakes her head, disdain written on her face. "That's why there was a lot of pressure on the organization to distribute and advertise that new drug. During this campaign, one slogan in particular became rather popular. It went 'Sense your true self on your own'. You can see that it was targeted especially at single Sentinels. In my opinion, this campaign was instrumental in implanting widespread misconceptions in people's minds, about Sentinels being unable to function on their own."

Aoko, shifting on her feet next to Kaito, can't keep herself from asking, "So that is not the case?"

"In eighty percent of all cases it's not. Dangling bonds are more complicated, but those wouldn't necessarily form if proper care was applied beforehand and during bonding," Ito-sensei clarifies. "Indeed, there are very few things about either status, Guide or Sentinel, that can't be controlled, except, perhaps, compatibility and spontaneous bonds. Those are more unpredictable."

Kaito leaves his features carefully blank when she says this, poker face in place. He won't glance at Shinichi, he refuses to have such a simple tell.

"It doesn't change the fact that it's not easy to control one's abilities. To learn how to requires training, and, depending on the person's level, a rather delicate self-control. It can take years to arrive at the point where you're able to maintain that balance. The earlier you begin, the better."

"Most people don't test at a young age, though. Some refuse to be registered, at all," Shiratori intercepts.

"Precisely. It used to be different in the past, but after Sene, many people lost their trust in the SGO, the organization that runs the centers. And because of that, there's an even more heated debate going on internally, about how to regain it."

"I take it, there's a group that is searching for a replacement for Sene, which works just as quickly but is less harmful?" Kaito asks drily.

"They are desperate for that," Ito-sensei spits, "as if they learned nothing from the last debacle. Still, they want something like that, and some people..." She looks at Yamada-sensei's prone body with a mixture of anger and disgust, "some people were willing to bet on their patient's lives."

"What do you mean by that?" Shiratori asks sharply.

Aoko next to Kaito has gone white as a sheet.

"The young man who died so suddenly this weekend was one of Yamada-sensei's patients," whispers Nakano-sensei, tears in her eyes.

Chapter 13: Adagio

Notes:

Hello there,
I'm back. And I'm even rather early, at that! This week's chapter is finally featuring some more... feeings and thoughts. I really can't help myself, I'm so sorry for this slow development, but I promise we're getting there. Eventually. Up until then I'll have to rely on your patience. As always, I really want to thank you all for your lovely feedback, whatever shape or form it might have been in. I'm so incredibly happy about everyone who's reading my story and enjoying it!

Chapter Text

KID and Shinichi exit the center at about eight thirty. Nakamori-san stays behind with Shiratori in order to make her statement, having been a patient of Yamada-sensei's and even a victim of his treatment methods. The questioning is going to take place at the hospital, though, as it was immediately agreed upon that her health should be checked first. Kaito has offered to come along, but Nakamori-san just shook her head, and so the two unlikely companions find themselves alone in a cold December night once again.

There is music in Shinichi's head, the melody crisp and clean as it hasn't been all day; all of the last weekend, even. His mind is clear, and he is able to think like he hasn't been ever since this whole mess started. He listens to the tune almost reverently. It's only now that he notices he never paid close attention to his shields. They are a thing of necessity, and at times it's exhausting to always listen to something, to never have a true moment of quiet. But silence means he starts to drown in what the world around him feels. Silence in his head means turmoil in his heart. He can deal with the music. What he can't deal with is the unfiltered sorrow he feels from the thief next to him because of the look of doubt and hurt that Nakamori-san sent him before she left.

The song is Shinichi's. It's not his Air, though. It's a piano piece that manages to be both, sentimental and wild, dejected and hopeful at the same time. He lets the song float through the bond, not too loud, not overbearing, just an offering for KID to lean into if he feels like it.

For now, though, the thief is lost in his own world. His eyes are staring into the distance, unseeing. He doesn't bother with his barriers, but Shinichi doesn't mind keeping the harsh sensations of the cold winter night away from his Sentinel, wrapping him into the cocoon of his own shields.

"Do you feel like going for a walk?" Kaito asks, breaking the silence eventually.

He doesn't look at Shinichi.

"Sure. Haido Park is right around the corner," Shinichi agrees.

They make their way over there wordlessly. The treeline is looming ahead of them, looking pitch black to Shinichi. There are some roads that are illuminated by street lamps; others, however, lie in the darkness. Kaito opens the bond without prompting, letting Shinichi share his sharper vision. Shinichi doesn't tap into it just yet, still finding the well-lit path with ease.

Other people mill around on the winding walkways ahead of them. The time shortly before the New Year's celebrations is predestined for wanting to escape one's own four walls, maybe even one's family. It seems as if many of the Tokyoites are opting for a nightly walk in solitude. After garnering a few critical glances, Kaito and Shinichi turn onto a less illuminated, less used road.

"This sure reminds you of the fact that I do look like a child," Shinichi sighs tiredly.

"It does. Odd how I sometimes need a reminder of that. It doesn't feel like you are nine in the least," Kaito says.

"Are you referring to me helping Nakamori-san?" Shinichi asks.

Kaito's voice is hardly above a whisper when he replies. "You were very compelling."

"I had to be. I'm not bonded to her, so if I wanted to keep her from zoning, I had to use some force."

It's getting darker with each step, and Shinichi finally yields and taps into Kaito's eyesight. There is a sense of disconnect between his body and his view while he tries to adjust the perspectives, however, and he stumbles. Kaito catches him before he can even begin to fall, clasping Shinichi's hand in his larger one and pulling him along. It's weird doing that with him. Shinichi has had countless people taking his hand as Conan, but KID leading him through the park this way feels strangely personal. Still, he doesn't pull away.

"Have you ever thought how great it would be if we could just swap? If I could, I'd steal your Guide abilities in a heartbeat. I'd even leave you my Sentinel ones, because you've been so decent about this."

Kaito sounds teasing, but he feels heavy and sad. Shinichi doesn't know what to say to that, so he keeps quiet. It doesn't seem to matter to KID. He goes on in the same light tone which belies his true emotions.

"I could do what you did, then. If I were you, I could have been the one to notice her turmoil and quell it. I could've spared her the vision of that corpse, I could have protected her better. But I'm just a Sentinel. All I can do is hear steps and breaths and heartbeats, see the perspiration on her face and her pale skin and wide eyes. All I can do is sense how her hands grow icy. But I can't comfort her. I can't catch her."

Shinichi watches the gravel underneath their feet through KID's eyes, listens to the nearly noiseless flight of the bats and owls above them, feels the air on the other's face, fresh and clean here amid the trees.

"I couldn't, either. She only truly relaxed when your hands landed on her shoulders. I can make her look away for a moment. I can lure, I can create illusions of feelings that people don't feel, but in the end, I'm just a medium, letting the emotions of others wash through me and leave me with pieces that won't fit. I can't see her the way you do, KID. I felt it, you know? How she looks to you, sounds to you, smells to you. Would you really want to trade that in?"

"If it meant I could have her, I'd do it immediately," Kaito whispers.

He doesn't bother pretending anymore, lets his voice break as he speaks. Shinichi pulls them to a stop and turns to face the other. He blocks out Kaito's better eyesight in favor of his own, even though he can hardly make out the thief's features in the dark.

"You heard what Ito-sensei said. There's no reason you can't. At least, there's no reason you can't because you're a Sentinel."

Kaito stares at him, then turns and takes Shinichi a few steps further down the road until they reach a bench, where he settles down. Shinichi wraps his scarf a little tighter around himself.

"Shinichi," he begins after a while, "have you ever thought about what could have happened if the killer had still been there?"

Shinichi hesitates.

"Yes," he finally says, closing his eyes, and exhales heavily. "I've thought about a couple of things. I also wondered about what we should do if she met Yamada-sensei alive and he gave her another concoction of his. Or what to do if her condition worsened. I've been prepared for multiple worst-case scenarios."

"Why didn't we just go to the police and report it?" Kaito asks quietly.

"Because that might have revealed your identity."

"Along with yours."

Shinichi shakes his head. "There's no mole within the police ranks anymore. I've got nothing to fear."

"So you just did that to protect me?" Kaito asks.

Shinichi doesn't answer.

"Do you feel like we've taken too big a risk?" Kaito presses on.

"No. Between you and me, I am certain we would've never endangered her life."

"I agree. We wouldn't have."

The silence surrounding them is almost complete, until the sweet chime of the Haido Park's temple bell interrupts it. The high sound reverberates in the air and drifts away slowly, making something within Shinichi he didn't even know was frozen melt. Kaito next to him relaxes a little, too. Their legs spread out just enough for their thighs to be pressed together. Kaito hasn't let go of Shinichi's hand, either. It's a comforting touch without any deeper meaning to it. It's just settling, and they both deserve a breather, Shinichi thinks.

"I'm irresponsible, am I not?" Kaito laughs despairingly.

"Of course you are," Shinichi scoffs, before adding, "but so am I. I'm sorry. I won't be the one to slow you up when you may need that."

"Haibara said she was your voice of reason," Kaito chuckles.

"She tries valiantly."

"You don't need to apologize, Shinichi," KID says eventually, "I'm just frustrated with myself, that's all."

"It's pointless to be frustrated with yourself. There are only two things you can do: accept your own limitations and move on, or change what's bothering you. If you can't do the second, do the first, or vice versa. Those are the only choices if you don't want to get stuck," Shinichi replies quietly.

Kaito sighs. "I don't think I'll come to a conclusion on that front today. Why don't you talk shop to me? I could use a distraction in the shape of some bloody corpse talk."

"In that case, I've got great news for you. Being bound to me, bloody corpses are guaranteed to keep showing up in your vicinity," Shinichi snorts, before growing serious. "But there are indeed a few things we need to discuss. First of all, there's of course the issue of Nakamori-san's pills."

"You mean the fact that hers are going to contain vitamins?"

"Yes, exactly that. They'll probably confiscate them today, if I know anything about the way they work. We need to exchange them. I've texted Haibara before, asking her for the original capsules. We kept them as a precaution, handing only a few over to the police."

Kaito hums approvingly. "Smart."

"You know how thinking ahead works, too, don't you?" Shinichi says.

"Of course. But I like watching you do it," Kaito replies, and Shinichi knows he is smirking.

He gets up from the bench and pulls Shinichi along, his feet effortlessly picking their way through the lightless park.

"We can stop by the professor's on our way back to Ekoda. It's a bit of a detour, but I don't think they'll finish their check-up and the questioning quickly," Shinichi goes on.

"I hope so. They have to make sure she's fine," Kaito replies.

"With the short time she's taken it, and with how quickly she passed the state of withdrawal and woke up her senses, I'm pretty sure there haven't been grave physical side-effects just yet."

"So our first order of business is exchanging the pills. What comes next? This is far from over, even if the guy was indeed the source of this, is it?" Kaito asks.

"It isn't," Shinichi agrees, "there must've been more than one person involved in this. Ito-sensei made it clear that there was a faction within the center, and at least when she told us that, she was honest. She did lie about not knowing about his appointments, though. Just like Nakano-sensei, she was well aware of Yamada-sensei's patients and his meetings with representatives of pharmaceutical companies. I think she just wanted to distance herself from his approach, seeing as the dead patient of Yamada-sensei's had already made the news."

"Has his name appeared in any of your previous cases?" Kaito asked.

"Not that I recall. But that doesn't say much; there were many potential suspects. Nakano-sensei's has, though. She sometimes works at the emergency desk, registering new cases. She's been the first contact for some of the people arriving with dangling bonds."

"Nakano-sensei? I wouldn't have thought that she was involved, of all people. Ito-sensei was more suspicious to me," Kaito admits.

"Indeed. Also, we're missing the patient file of the man who died this weekend. Yamaguchi Tomohiro was nowhere to be found when I checked," Shinichi says.

"So without Nakano-sensei's statement we wouldn't have known?"

"Exactly."

"This has been done to hide traces," Kaito surmises.

"That's what I think, yes. This most probably came from within the center and has been done to cover up the most noticeable trace, which leads to Yamada-sensei. Confidentiality wouldn't have protected him from those of his colleagues who knew about him being Yamaguchi's doctor and weren't necessarily happy with his treatment methods."

"You don't sound surprised."

"We expected this to be bigger and reach deeper within the structure of the center. So it's only to be expected that there's someone trying to clean up behind themselves," Shinichi explains.

"What are you going to do now?"

Shinichi shrugs. "Wait. I'm sure Satou will contact Hattori when this is dragged into the station by Shiratori. We're already unofficial consultants on the case, so I can easily step in once I get the opportunity. Also, Hattori arranged a meeting with a scientist who works with a group that studied the substance used in those drugs. We're going there tomorrow. Maybe we can learn a little more about its origins."

They have reached the border of the park by now, stepping onto the broadly lit sidewalk. Kaito still doesn't let go of his hand, and Shinichi lets the thief take the lead through the tall buildings rising up around them.

"So you think it's pointless that they want to evaluate the security feed of the center?"

"They're not going to find anything," Shinichi confirms. "Not even the weapon. I'm assuming the culprit took it and flushed it down the toilet after the murder. It must've been a steel string of some kind; the wound looked like it was caused by something quite cutting. I don't think we'll be able to retrieve it. And I'm sure Yamada-sensei knew the culprit, and didn't expect it. There was hardly a sign of struggle. The office must've been searched afterwards."

"That last part does point to an inside job, though the first is mostly speculation, isn't it?"

"Yes. But seeing as Shiratori sent out his team to search the building for traces, I'm sure we'll soon learn whether or not I'm right," Shinichi agrees.

They cross the street and leave Haido behind, entering Beika instead.

"What are you going to tell Nakamori-san?" Shinichi asks after a short pause.

"About you?" Kaito asks.

"There's no chance in hell that she believes I'm a normal child anymore," Shinichi says matter-of-factly, peering up at KID.

He reaches nearly up to his chest now, no longer the tiny six year old he's been once. The years haven't even passed Conan by without a trace. Still, if he were in his actual body, they would be the same height, Shinichi thinks idly. He wonders if Kaito would take his hand as easily then, too.

"I'm probably going to go with undercover investigations. It's not exactly inspired, since that's kind of what you do, but it'll give her the best possible explanation of why we were even there," Kaito replies.

Shinichi nods. "You can be as unspecific as you like. It would make sense that you weren't told much if they involved you as an outsider."

"Don't worry, I've got a long history of telling her lies, I know how to."

He sounds tired and dejected as he says it. Shinichi squeezes his hand in sympathy before he can stop himself. They are similar in that regard, always cooking up stories. Today, Shinichi is once again staying over at the professor's, as far as Ran and even Hattori are concerned. It isn't something he will ever enjoy doing, lying to his friends. Still, there is nothing to be done about it. His compassion reaches out through the bond and meets with gratitude from the other, gratitude for not asking, for simply understanding. Kaito squeezes his hand back.

They reach the professor's home after a while of walking in silence. Kaito stays back a few houses, not having brought his disguise from last time, and Shinichi rings the doorbell on his own. Haibara opens up swiftly. She has a bag ready for him.

"Thank you," he murmurs, relieved that she is so prepared.

She watches him quizzically.

"You feel different, Kudou. Your bond is noticeable on you," she whispers back.

"I'm keeping it open right now, Haibara. It doesn't work when I close it off. Messes with my barriers."

"I see," she says, deciding not to ask any more questions, "take care then. You're on a schedule, aren't you?"

Her eyes are unreadable, and her mind is once more smooth and impenetrable.

Shinichi nods and bids her goodbye. They will talk again, sooner or later.

She is one of the few people he still is honest with, and he will need that. Right now, it's just her and Kaito, he realizes. Not that he told the thief everything about the organization, but he probably would if he asked. There is no need to keep it a secret from him. He has been tied up in that business before, what with that incident on Suzuki-san's train, and he already knows about Shinichi's identity, so there is no need to stay quiet about it.

Something within Shinichi tells him the other won't ask, though. Just as Shinichi isn't going to ask about why exactly KID keeps on stealing, what he is looking for, and whom he wants to attract with his flashy shows. It's probably because they both know the necessities of secrets and are both the kind of person that will always try to solve things on their own.

Shinichi pushes the hand Kaito held on their way here further into his pocket. It still feels warm. He wonders if KID has allies on his mission, too; if there are people he learned to rely on like Shinichi did over the years. When he first got shrunk, he didn't know the value of having someone by his side, too used to working alone, never needing the help of others. Only as Conan has he come to truly appreciate it, and maybe that has been one of the good lessons this whole debacle has taught him.

Kaito takes them back to Ekoda via the skyway. Shinichi doesn't have a clue where exactly he stored his glider, but when they meet again it's there. The thief holds out his arms once more for Shinichi. He is wearing some sort of harness that wasn't there last time.

While slipping the loops around Shinichi's midsection, he says teasingly, "You grew heavier since the airship incident."

"It would've been strange if I didn't change between then and now," Shinichi replies drily.

"There are quite a few strange things about you, Shinichi," Kaito chuckles, done with securing him, and propels the two of them into the air.

"I don't even know how you managed to hide a motor on you the whole time," Shinichi groans.

"You always have to be prepared," Kaito says.

Shinichi can hear him grin once more. It leaves him feeling a little lighter.



***



Ten in the evening finds Shinichi and Kaito in the living room of the latter's home again, the pills exchanged and taken away by the police. There are empty take-out boxes before them that Shinichi ordered while KID completed his recovery mission.

The thief is zapping from channel to channel, stretched out on the sofa with his head propped up against Shinichi's shoulder and his feet pressed into one armrest. Shinichi is squeezed in between him and the other, flicking through the images on his phone. It's weird how natural it feels for KID to be this close. The music between them is steady, though much lower than usually. Shinichi can't make out the song. He focuses on his search for Nakamori-san's patient data among the documents he photographed illegally, but they aren't there.

"They should summon Nakano-sensei to the station. She has to consolidate the list of his patients with us. It's possible that the murderer took all relevant data with him," he says.

"Are the police going to contact his patients?" Kaito asks.

"I think they're already doing it. Every minute might count here. I'm sure they also issued an official warning against the drug by now, urging those taking it to seek professional help immediately. But it might not reach everyone," Shinichi says grimly.

Kaito leaves the report on the channel he landed on running, lifting his head slightly to watch Shinichi.

"Are you blaming yourself for not having them give out a warning more quickly?"

Shinichi's jaw tenses, quite against his will.

"You're not leading these investigations, Tantei-kun. That's something the officials have to decide. If they didn't after yesterday, that's on them," Kaito murmurs softly.

A chime sounds through the living room. It's oddly familiar. Shinichi looks up and sees the temple he and the kids passed by on their walk in the park a few days ago. It's the same bell him and Kaito heard earlier this evening, too. It's not overly large, the bell, but very ornate; intricately decorated. The anchorman reports that it's supposed to be taken away on the first day of the new year, despite the protest of a group of people living nearby.

"Such a shame. It sounds lovely," Shinichi says, captivated.

"It does," Kaito agrees pensively, watching the coverage.

That is when Shinichi's phone rings. He checks the screen. It's Hattori.

"Kudou, can you talk?" he greets him when Shinichi picks up, and Kaito lowers the TV's volume.

"Yes. What is it?" Shinichi replies, even though he has an inkling already about why Hattori is calling.

"There's been a case at the center," Hattori replies, and begins to tell Shinichi a story he already knows.

He listens closely, anyway, in order to gather which information the police have at this point.

"So we've got a dead physician, missing patient data and a load of medication for the lab?" Shinichi summarizes eventually, satisfied with division one's work.

Much of it has been his own, granted.

"Yes. No signs of a fight at the scene, too, implying an inside job. Bet they won't find a weapon, however," Hattori says.

"I'd reckon the same," Shinichi replies. "Have they scheduled any questioning?"

"On the first, they want to meet the wife of the dead man. Tomorrow, they'll try to get more information from the doctors who were at the scene. Will you come?"

"I thought we're going to talk to that scientist tomorrow," Shinichi reminds Hattori.

"In the afternoon. That questioning is going to be in the morning, at eleven."

"I see. I'll let you know by nine," Shinichi says pensively.

Even if Shiratori has been more than believing, he doesn't want to appear before the doctors in both of his child forms. If he wants to do this, he will have to talk to Haibara again.

"You're cagey lately, Kudou. What's going on with you?" Hattori asks.

Kaito shifts next to Shinichi on the sofa, a warm, steady weight against his shoulder.

"Nothing much, just some case stuff," Shinichi deflects calmly.

"If you think I believe a word of that you're dead wrong," Hattori snaps back.

"It's nothing, really, Hattori, leave it be, alright? Why don't you tell me what's going on with you and Kazuha-chan instead?" Shinichi returns.

It's a low shot and he knows it, but sometimes he just needs to get the hot-headed Osakan to back off. There is a short moment of silence, before Hattori answers.

"We'll bond," he replies quietly, stunning Shinichi into being speechless for a couple of seconds.

"Congratulations," he finally murmurs softly, feeling guilty.

"Oh, stop it, Kudou, I can see your conscience-stricken face from here. It's not like this is your fault. Also, it's not like we don't want to. I've come to realize that, in the end, I'm only holding myself back without any reason at all. I know I'm in love with her. Making her wait just doesn't make any sense to me." He hears Hattori sigh over the phone. "You're right, you know? Before long, it could be too late, and I'm not ready to gamble this away for nothing. It won't always be easy, but I know she's the one, so we'll manage."

"Yes, I'm sure the two of you will," Shinichi replies gently.

"I've been thinking, too, you know, about you and Ran," Hattori goes on.

Shinichi remains silent. He doesn't want to speak about it, but it seems only fair after making Hattori talk about his situation.

"Don't you think that, at some level, you decided against her? It's been years. You're pretty much safe now. But you decided against telling her and kept slipping away further and further. So... I'm no Guide, you know, or a therapist, but it just seemed to me like maybe there's a part of you that... I don't know. Doesn't want her with you."

"I do not want her with me," Shinichi confirms quietly, "not when that is next to corpses and in the line of fire. Being next to me is never easy."

"You'll end up lonely thinking this way. It's not that hard to be around you, if you can look after yourself. I think she could've. You just never gave her the benefit of the doubt," Hattori replies.

"Well, what if I had been wrong?" Shinichi returns.

"Yeah. I know. But still."

They say their goodbyes soon after, and Shinichi stares into the empty space of the living room. KID's home still looks oddly lifeless, as if he isn't truly here, usually. The only room that really has traces of use is Kaito's own, but the rest is neat and tidy and cold. It's a strange contrast to the warm body still pressing against Shinichi's side and radiating comfort.

"I'm sorry, I listened in," the thief murmurs.

His voice is soft and raspy, sounding like velvet.

"I figured you would be forced to, your ears being what they are," Shinichi replies.

"Do you think he was right? About your friend?"

"Probably. I've thought so before. But in the end, it's how I am. I wouldn't act any differently even knowing all that I know now. So I've accepted it," Shinichi says.

He turns his head and looks down into Kaito's ocean-colored eyes. There is green mixed within the blue, he thinks.

"I'd hate it if I were in her position. But I get it, being in yours," the other says.

"I know. But you're different, you know? I've never had any qualms about exposing you to explosions."

"Some of our more fun adventures, if a bit mean-spirited," Kaito smiles.

Shinichi hesitates for just a moment, thinking back to the conversation they had before they headed to the center with Aoko. It must have been a lifetime ago, and yet, only one long afternoon and evening have passed since then.

"You know, I've been meaning to tell you. You said you were the last person I'd want to be bonded with, earlier today. It's true I wasn't happy at all when I realized we were connected at first, but it's not like that anymore. You aren't... It's not... I'm kind of glad it's you. Because I don't have to explain," he finishes, struggling for words.

Kaito's expression is open and surprised. Shinichi thinks he can discern something like relief in it, maybe even a bit of happiness.

"Thank you," KID replies, lifting his hand and ruffling Shinichi's hair. He probably doesn't miss the blush on his cheeks.

 

Chapter 14: Pausa

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

"I'll be off then," Shinichi says the next morning, shuffling his feet while standing in front of Kaito's door.

He has already put on his shoes, jacket, and scarf, but instead of leaving, he is fiddling with the beanie in his hands.

"Take care, Meitantei," Kaito replies and tries for a reassuring smile.

It's difficult to convince the other that he is fine when his Guide can probably still feel the churning emotions circling through Kaito's head, but his worries are unfounded.

Kaito is in a much better state than yesterday. Having Shinichi with him helped more than he expected.

Kaito's barriers are stable this morning. There is a sweet bachata beat thrumming through his mind. The bond isn't interfering at all; it's a steady, strong presence that feels much like Shinichi: reliable, understanding, and unassuming.

It's much more noticeable than it used to be, though. Where Kaito thought it felt like a thin string before, there is a sturdy piece of rope by now. Despite the strength, however, Kaito is certain they will be able to sever it, once they manage to close it off. But so far, whenever they tried to shut it down completely, they lost their balance, indicating it wasn't time yet.

"Take care of yourself, too. Don't do something stupid," Shinichi cautions him.

"Whatever would I do?" Kaito asks, laughing.

"I don't know. Break into the houses of Ito or Nakano, for example," Shinichi huffs.

He looks put out, but there is real worry mixed into his voice.

"I'm not going to. I promise. Besides, I might have a prior engagement tonight, anyway. I like to limit my trespassing tendencies to one incident per day," Kaito smirks.

Shinichi's eyes snap up to him, instantly alert.

"What are you talking about?" he asks, distrustful.

"You'll see. Until very soon, dear detective," Kaito sings.

He sinks down to his knees in an exaggerated show of deference, takes Shinichi's hand, and presses a kiss to its back. Shinichi snatches it away as if burned, not noticing Kaito shoving a note into his pocket all the while.

"I sure hope not," he bites back, but Kaito knows it's just because he struggles with another blush.

He turns quickly and is out of the door before Kaito can get a glimpse of those stormy, indigo eyes.

The house is instantly wrapped in silence again. Kaito sighs and gets up from where he is still kneeling, moving back into his empty home. He hates to admit how it felt much less so in the presence of the tiny detective. His traces are still there, noticeable to Kaito's superior senses. The smell of his shampoo and his laundry detergent lingers faintly in the air. On the carpet, he can see the imprints of tiny feet.

Kaito didn't think he needed a friend before. It's only now, after getting in this terrible mess with an accidental bond, that he sees the empty space by his side where a confidant should be, a space that is becoming more and more distinctly Shinichi-shaped, whether Kaito likes it or not. Maybe it's a good thing, he tells himself, making his way back up to his room and rifling through his wardrobe for fresh clothes, maybe he has been lucky once more, in a twisted way, and will walk away from this with an addition to the few people he can count on.

He enters the bathroom, strips and steps into the shower, turning the water to hot. His thoughts are threatening to circle back to the events from yesterday, but Kaito blocks them out forcefully. Instead, he tries to focus on the plans he made for the evening. It will be nice to start the new year with a resounding bang, he thinks, smiling a little as he imagines the face of Shinichi when he finds his note.

He wonders if the detective will instantly know what he is talking about. Probably. The message has been written with him in mind, after all. Kaito chuckles softly and rinses off quickly, vibrating with energy to get something done. Melancholy isn't much for him, after all.

He steps out of the shower and dries himself, leaving the towel on his shoulders to catch the droplets falling from his hair, before moving in front of the mirror to brush his teeth. His eyesight is ramping up a little, taking in the healthy complexion of his face. The circles underneath his eyes are gone. Shinichi, too, looked less pale today, Kaito thinks. It's incredible, how much the bond influences them on a physical level.

Kaito slings the towel over the rack and picks up clean underwear and his jeans and shirt from yesterday. After getting dressed, he walks down into his kitchen, intending to throw together some breakfast, maybe treat himself to a cup of cocoa. Upon entering, he almost jumps out of his skin. At the table sits a tired-looking, pale Aoko, occupying the very chair Shinichi vacated moments before, some bowls containing rice and miso soup placed in front of her. She has brought him breakfast.

"A-aoko, why didn't you say something? I didn't hear you come in," Kaito stammers.

He hasn't even noticed how lost in his thoughts he has been for his ears to be shut down as much as they are.

"Where's Touya-kun? Didn't he stay over?" Aoko asks quietly.

"He left twenty minutes ago," Kaito replies, thinking back to the flush on Shinichi's face as he turned around and went home.

"Where did you meet him?" Aoko asks.

"What do you mean where did I meet him? He's my-" Kaito tries, but he knows it's not going to work out.

"Don't lie to me, Kaito. That wasn't a normal little boy. You're no Guide, and I know that a Guide calmed me down yesterday. It could've only been him," she interrupts him.

Kaito thinks feverishly. "Ah, are you sure? Maybe you weren't as upset as you thought."

"Stop trying to evade the question and answer!"

Kaito's eyes catch the lit screen of her phone next to her. She's reading an article about the FBI and CIA working together to stop an illegal arms deal scheduled to go down last night at the harbor. He has got to try to convince her with the guise they thought of yesterday, he realizes.

"Alright, listen, I'm sorry, okay? He is working with an undercover police force, I'm not allowed to tell you which. After a sudden death of a patient this weekend, they intended to investigate that doctor you went to. They actually wanted to question you first. But when they tried to meet you that day, you and your dad were out, and I happened to run into them. They noticed we look a lot alike and asked me to help with the cover," Kaito babbles, trying to spin a somewhat convincing tale.

Judging by Aoko's face, he doesn't succeed.

"Since when do they use kids for undercover investigations? And did you bully your way into this out of curiosity when you stumbled across those people? I thought you didn't like detectives," she frowns.

A jolt of panic runs through Kaito as he tries to keep his harebrained story together.

"It wasn't so much about the investigation," he answers, hiding his fear behind an embarrassed smile.

Aoko's eyes flash dangerously. Her hands are clenched to fists, knuckles white, and Kaito can see the how she sets her jaw in a way that promises an argument.

"So you mean to tell me you learned about this, and instead of informing me what was going on, you worked with people you didn't even know, trailing me to my appointment without saying anything?"

"I thought you weren't in immediate danger, otherwise I would never-"

"This isn't about me being in danger. This is about me being able to make my own decisions!"

"I was certain they'd tell you and you would be able to do just that!"

"But only after you decided to get involved! What if I didn't want you to? What if I wanted to sort this out by mself?" Aoko shouts.

"So you wanted me to tell you before? To what end? What would I even have told you? I didn't know anything about it! And how was I supposed to know you got that type of therapy? It's not like you thought it necessary to share with me that you did something this dangerous!" Kaito shoots back, mixing the truth with the lie without even thinking about it, feeling cornered and guilty.

"Because it's none of your business!"

"It bloody well is, if my best friend decides to throw her life away on experimental drugs that haven't even been officially approved!" he counters heatedly.

"No! No, it isn't! I'm my own person and it's for me to decide what to do with myself and what not," Aoko hisses.

"Yes! But you didn't even have all the information, and I couldn't tell you about it, because I wasn't supposed to know, either, and had no proof!"

Aoko gets up, her chair toppling over with the force of her sudden movement. "You could have tried me! Instead you went ahead and didn't even give me the benefit of the doubt!"

Kaito's heart nearly stops, hearing her repeat the exact same words Tantei-han told Shinichi yesterday over the phone. He realized back in that moment how they applied to both of them, but he never expected to be confronted by them again so quickly.

"I couldn't risk that! What if you decided to ignore me and insisted I get out of the way? Or worse, what if you got into a dangerous situation because of my meddling?"

"I DON'T NEED TO BE PROTECTED BY YOU!" Aoko screams, and a ringing silence fills the room.

Kaito doesn't know what to say. Aoko lets out a shuddering breath.

"All you do is keep things from me, Kaito," she says, much calmer now she is certain she has Kaito's attention. "You don't need to deny it, I just know. You're always keeping secrets in one way or another, you're always off to somewhere, and you never stop to tell me where or ask me if I'd like to come. I'm fed up with watching you walk away from behind."

Kaito struggles to get enough air in his lungs, as his chest seems to contract in pain and his stomach feels like it's dropping out of his body. His voice is rough and husky when he finally speaks.

"I can't always take you with me. I wish I could. But you know that in the end, I'll always come back to you."

Aoko watches him with unfathomable, sky-blue eyes. Kaito thinks that he always liked how he could easily tell what she felt. He doesn't have a single clue right now.

"Before I saw you with that kid yesterday, I thought you just were that way. But I realized I was wrong. This really isn't about how you are, but how I am to you. At first, I thought that maybe I could change that. But if I haven't during all those years, then why would I now? It's always going to be you leaving me behind, and me waiting for you to return," she finally says tonelessly. "I'm sorry, Kaito. I'm done with sticking around for that."

Kaito watches her leave helplessly, feeling utterly shattered knowing this is all his own fault. She is right, there is nothing he can say against it. It's exactly what he has been doing without even realizing, and now she dragged all those secrets, all those unspoken actions between them into the harsh light of the day, exposing them for what they are: a lack of trust. A trust he never puts in her, even after all those years where she has stood by him.

"I could work on it," he tries, when she is already at the door.

She hesitates.

"You could," she says, then turns to give him a resigned look, "but I don't think you want to, do you?"

"Of course I do," Kaito insists.

He does, he truly does. But at the same time, he knows he can't. He doesn't want to lose her, and yet, there is Pandora, there is his father's legacy, there is a side to him she doesn't know.

"Then Kaito. How about you tell me the truth?"

"About what?" he croaks.

"How about when you met Touya-kun, for a start, and how he is such an adept Guide that he could calm me down like someone more than twice his age maybe couldn't have?"

There is the faint smell of a Guide's shampoo and detergent in the air the existence of whom he can't relay to her. Kaito starts to open his mouth, and it's only to tell another lie. He stops, looking at her like a fish out of the water. Aoko opens the door without a word and closes it silently behind her.

 

Notes:

Hello, today I'm greeting you guys from a completely new position!
I hope you're all doing well and I want to thank you for your awesome, kind and supportive reactions to the last chapter. You are truly amazing!
That being said, the next thing I'll have to do is probably to apologize. Because this chapter is short and comparatively painful, though I'd argue we've been working up to this point for a while, now. So, I'm sorry for this. But I swear we'll take care of poor Kaito later on.

Chapter 15: Crescendo

Notes:

Hi there!
You guys are the best, you know that? Thank you so much for all your warm support on the last chaper and in general. I'm so glad to have readers like you :) I hope you're doing well and come here with some patience in your hearts, because this chapter is very case-oriented. I can imagine that after the last one, you're longing for something else, so I'm once more here to apologize. Though I'm rather confident that I won't have to repeat that course of action next week! Yay! Also, special thanks go to my ghostly friend, for helping me with the wording of a certain passage that was supposed to rhyme.

Chapter Text

Shinichi nervously fingers the black leather briefcase on his lap. It feels too small, fitting just so on top of his thighs. On the walk to Haibara's place it appeared much larger in his hands, earning him looks ranging from indulgent to amused from the passers-by.

His hands are still shaking, and his head is oddly quiet, as if every last part of him, even his mind, is still settling into his body. He pulls the baseball hat deeper into his face. Secretly, he is glad that he has got the bond, despite having sworn just hours ago not to waste any more time thinking about it, when that cursed thief started teasing him again. It's invaluable in steadying him emotionally, even though it simultaneously has him in absolute disarray.

His fist clenches around the note he found in his pocket after leaving KID's home at seven in the morning. The damned criminal succeeding in distracting him with that salute stings even more than him being able to come up with a heist note with Shinichi around the entire time.



"Resounding chime leading me through the night,

Around the clock I wish you always stayed,

Where houses turn to forest for respite,

I'll have the precious sound replaced by quiet,

Before the last of 108 strikes fade."



Below, he has drawn a winking doodle of himself, and on the back he has written 'Meet you there, Meitantei!'

Usually, KID's announcements tend to lift his spirits, but today Shinichi can't say they do. Hattori's words from the phone call are still stuck in his head, gnawing away at his defenses. Ran's face ghosts through his mind, overlaid with Nakamori-san's.

Shinichi is good at sensing emotions even when people don't give him credit for it, but sometimes he wishes he weren't. Then he wouldn't have been forced to sense the desperation, the disappointment, the doubt Ran directed at him the last time he was able to call her as himself and tell her he would be back soon.

"When will that be? What will you do in the meantime? Can't you tell me anything, Shinichi? Hasn't it been long enough?"

She uttered these words upstairs in her room, her feelings so strong in the air Shinichi felt like he was trapped in a stormy forest, the air smelling of cold rain and mud even downstairs in the agency from where he called once more.

He recognized the same feeling in Nakamori-san's eyes when they watched her walk away with Shiratori's officers. It was all he could do to keep it from his Sentinel.

Watching KID pull himself together behind his mask this morning has been almost as painful. Shinichi couldn't help but want to reach out, despite it only garnering him cheeky remarks and thinly veiled attempts at making him blush. Kaito felt lonely when Shinichi left him. It isn't a good look on him. Still, it's burned into his mind now, and Shinichi feels guilty for leaving him behind, even if he has got work to do. So it's probably only fair the thief found a way to add to it.

"Damn him," Shinichi curses under his breath, vowing to stop thinking about his Sentinel for now.

Unsure whether Nakamori received his own invitation, he was forced to make a copy of the note at the agency and sent it off to the police. He only scanned the front, though, making sure the message on the back wasn't visible. Shinichi won't expose KID, that much is for certain, but he won't try to hush up his crimes, too. The very last thing either of them needs, however, is for Shinichi to be tied to any of this. Only afterwards he made his way over to the professor's.

Haibara, keeping as irregular a sleep schedule as himself, greeted him fully dressed, even though it was barely eight in the morning. The dark circled eyes and the ashen complexion could have only belonged to someone who didn't go to bed at all that night.

She took one look at him, listening to the particularly slow rendition of a waltz making up his shields in that moment, and ushered him in. They snuck into her laboratory quietly, mindful not to wake the slumbering professor.

Downstairs she turned to him. "What do you need?"

"I've got to accompany Hattori and the police to some interrogations, but I can't go as a child. Could I use a temporary antidote for the day?"

She gave him a skeptical glance, before handing over the pill without any resistance. They relocated to the Kudou mansion together, where she simply stood by as he transformed into his real body, a steady, calming presence close to him. Shinichi thought he should let her know more often that he appreciates her way of being a friend. Haibara always knows when it's time to pry and when it's not, and she didn't utter a word.

"Give me a call once you've got it all wrapped up," she said to him before he went to meet Hattori at nine-thirty, when they were both certain there were no negative consequences of the transformation to be expected.

She told him he would get forty-eight hours, an estimate he expects to be accurate. She has known for quite a while already how to dose the antidote in order for the effects to last over any desired period of time.

Now he is sitting on the train taking him to Hattori's flat, feeling too small for his tall body. The feeling of not belonging in his own skin is even stronger due to the rather new suit he is wearing since he outgrew his old ones in the recent years. Shinichi's nineteen-year-old self is nearly five centimeters taller than he was when he shrunk.

With hands still unsteady he rights the cuffs of his jacket and then proceeds to fidget with his glasses. Disguise is a necessary precaution, even if this one is nearly as unimaginative as Hori Touya has been.

There are few people on the train, seeing as it's nine-fifteen, and the rush hour is already over. With it being New Year's Eve, there is even less traffic than usual, and the few people that are taking the subway are mostly distracted by their phones. Shinichi has enough space to himself to not have to worry about his twitching being noticed. He hopes it will abate before he arrives at Hattori's. He is not in the mood for being subjected to an interrogation himself right now.

Shinichi's stop is announced via speaker soon enough, and he exits quietly, mixing with the crowd of people that pushes through the subway station. It smells like food and fresh coffee around him, which reminds him of his painfully empty stomach.

Shinichi checks his watch once he made it past the turnstile. It's still early enough to stop for a quick breakfast somewhere. He decides on a small store in the main hall of the station, choosing a table in the back after ordering a black coffee and a fruit salad. A traditional Japanese breakfast seems a little too heavy for how queasy he is feeling, so he forgoes it in favor of something lighter. While he waits, he takes out his phone.

His mind is slowly returning to normalcy, even though it's a shaky one. He listens closely for a moment, until he can identify the notes that ghost through his head. The heavily distorted guitar gives him pause for a bit, before Shinichi recognizes it as a Hendrix classic and instantly wants to smash his head into the table. It doesn't bode well for his intention not to think of a certain thief that he is using 'Little Wing' to shield his mind.

In an attempt to keep himself busy for the time being, Shinichi impatiently unlocks his screen and searches for the news. The case from yesterday already made headlines, as the journalist who reported on Sunday's incident has learned of this one, too. They clearly have insider information. It might come either from the center, or, more likely, from the police. That is bothersome, since there are little new revelations for Shinichi in the article which will ultimately only warn off the culprit.

A waitress approaches with his order just then. He gives her a crooked smile and a thank you when she places it in front of him, and she beams at him in return. She seems to be in a good mood, Shinichi observes. The girl is about twenty, rather on the small side, with big brown eyes and a smattering of freckles on her face.

She reminds him of Ayumi somehow, also in the way he can feel the senses of a Sentinel thrum underneath her skin. She must be coming online soon. Her eyes catch his phone screen and linger on what he is reading. Her brows shoot up.

"What a gruesome story! Is there a serial killer at large?"

"Not exactly, fortunately," Shinichi replies, giving her a reassuring smile, "but there seems to be an issue with unauthorized treatments of Sentinels by the center. A new sort of experimental drug which causes heavy damage in the long run has been discovered. It's fairly dangerous."

She blanches. "What is that drug supposed to do?"

Shinichi's gaze snaps to her and he observes her closely. Where she was chipper and relaxed just a moment ago, she is trembling now, breathing fast. "It's a type of suppressant. Are you aware of it?"

She sways. Shinichi just manages to get out of his seat and catch her before she stumbles and falls. He quickly signals for one of her colleagues, then checks for her pulse. Her heart rate is elevated and slightly irregular.

"I-I," the girl stutters and pushes shaking hands into her pocket, pulling out a small casket.

Shinichi, with a sinking feeling, snaps it open and finds a couple of very familiar capsules inside. He acts swiftly, pulling his suitcase close and rummaging through it until he finds the box he has been carrying around ever since Haibara handed it to him.

"What's going on?" another waitress asks, panicked, as she rushes to Shinichi's table.

"Call an ambulance," Shinichi says hastily while forcing one of Haibara's pills into the other girl's mouth and handing her his own coffee to wash it down.

He prays that it will kick in quickly enough. The first time he saw them he didn't recognize the signs, at the cinema with Ran and Araide-sensei, having been too slow, too distracted. He still remembers how the young man collapsed in front of him. It happened so fast that he didn't even get the chance to act. But Shinichi will be damned if he can't do anything now.

He lets his music reach out for the girl's frantic mind.

"Try to breathe steadily, try to remain calm. What I gave you is a quick acting medicine, it'll help you. We'll get you to the hospital and you'll be alright," he tells her.

She is still shaking awfully, and he senses that she is about to collapse. Shinichi reaches out and lifts her, glad his body is capable of doing so.

"Is there some place where she could lie down?" he asks the other waitress when she returns to them after making her call.

She nods and leads him through the store's kitchen, away from prying eyes.

"I'll take care of her. You'd better wait in the front room, so you can show them the way," Shinichi tells her.

She nods again and hurries off. Shinichi puts the fainting girl in his arms down and holds her legs up, all the while keeping a wrist of hers in his hand and feeling for her pulse, fast and unsteady.

"My chest hurts," she whimpers.

"It's okay," Shinichi says, "focus on breathing. Just slow and steady. In and out."

He keeps talking to her, guiding her, until he finally hears people arrive outside. Even then he rests his entire concentration on her, calming her mind and keeping her conscious. The paramedics and emergency doctor rush into the room. One of them, clearly a Sentinel, immediately addresses Shinichi.

"Don't stop steadying her, Guide. Try keeping her responsive."

The girl's eyes widen even more, but Shinichi stems his mind against her panic with all his might.

"Don't worry, they're just doing their job. It's a little hectic around us now, but you're going to be okay."

Her grip on his hand intensifies, but her expression smooths out a little while the doctor begins treating her by first hooking her to an ECG. They quickly put her on a stretcher and give her an anticoagulant.

"She's improving," the medic says, as the first readings appear on his computer, "the heart rate is stabilizing."

"I've reason to assume she took the new drug for Sentinels and has a reaction to it," Shinichi informs the man.

"The one from the news?" he asks sharply.

Shinichi nods.

"Alright. Thank you for the information. We're going to take her to the hospital, but it seems like she will be able to pull through. Are you her Guide?"

"No," Shinichi says, "I'm bonded to another."

"Then we'll look for some emergency support. Thank you for helping."

Shinichi nods and turns to the girl.

"I'm going to have to let you go now," he says gently.

She looks about ready to pass out, but there is a weak smile on her face.

"Thank you," she whispers.

"Don't worry about it. Focus on getting well," he says.

Ten minutes later, breakfast forgotten and now officially running late, Shinichi rings Haibara.

"What is it?" she asks, worry tainting her tone. "Is there an issue with the antidote?"

"Haibara, I forgot about something important," Shinichi says. "You need to call division one now and tell them about your medication for the Sentinels who used that suppressant. It just saved a young girl's life, but if it continues this way, cases might be happening all over Tokyo soon. They need to issue official warnings, and doctors need a counter-agent."

Haibara remains silent.

"You can say it's the professor's work, if you want to," he presses.

"He doesn't have the credentials," Haibara murmurs, "only I do."

"They would still trust him. I'm sure we can bend it somehow," Shinichi assures her.

"No, Kudou, this isn't something I can push off to somebody else. If time is of importance, then it's me who should hand it in. Even if it puts me in danger. Even if it requires me leaving this new life behind and take on the cloak of a scientist whose inventions killed people before. Even if I have to give up on the things I came to love as Haibara Ai and have to work with the bloodied hands of Miyano Shiho again."

"You thought about this," Shinichi states.

"From the moment I completed the counter-agent, yes," Haibara says quietly.

"Haibara... I-"

"I always knew this was borrowed time, Kudou. Me facing the consequences of my actions was always going to happen at some point."

"You already did that, Haibara. You have never been hiding away from your guilt, no matter how small the shoulders to balance it on were. And whatever comes next, I promise you, I'm going to be your friend. Whether I've got to call you Haibara or Miyano."

There is another moment of silence between them, before she replies.

"Meitantei. After all we've been through together, don't you think you should call me Shiho?"

She hangs up on him before Shinichi can quite recover from his surprise, but he knows her well enough to hear the gratitude underneath her teasing. He will have to go and meet her later, but first he has to contact Akai. He is not going to let her put her life on the line without any protection.



***



"You were supposed to be here at nine-thirty, and that's been an hour ago. Any reason you kept me waiting for that long?" Hattori grouses letting Shinichi into his flat.

Kazuha-chan isn't there. She left in the morning to spend New Year's with her family in Osaka. Hattori is supposed to join them later on, planning to take the first available train after finishing the interrogation of the scientist they are supposed to meet at three. It's a tight schedule. In order to exchange some more information about the case in light of the recent development, they originally planned to meet early. Now they are nearly running late for the first appointment with Nakano-sensei.

Shinichi quickly informs Hattori of the events at the station, while taking the leather jacket and gloves he is offered and putting them on. He deposits his briefcase by the shoe rack. It only holds the papers Haibara gave him a while ago, on the compound the new drug is made up from, and he won't need it until their meeting at the university.

He does take the box with the counter-agent along, however, only to be on the safe side.

"Damn. As far as excuses go, saving someone's life is pretty solid," Hattori curses.

"I didn't. It's thanks to Haibara the girl's going to make it. Which is why I had to make sure we spread that information," Shinichi disagrees.

Hattori rolls his eyes. "You administered it, so don't be so modest. It's great she got the chance to develop it, though. Good of the FBI to leave her some samples."

Shinichi says nothing, still not having explained that connection to his friend, and probably never going to. Hattori continues speaking after a short pause.

"But is Haibara-san going to be alright? I always thought she wanted to stay with the professor. As a kid, I mean. And I thought it's still dangerous for you guys."

"I'm going to make sure she is okay. It's not like she has to leave, just because she's an adult in body, too. I doubt the professor would kick her out. As for the rest, I made sure she's properly looked after," Shinichi replies grimly.

"You are one scary guy to cross, Kudou," Hattori smirks, before throwing a helmet at Shinichi. "Let's go, though. I'm going to have to speed already."



***



Nakano-sensei lives in a high-rise close to the city center, only a short commute from her workplace. Her flat is simple and rather small, and there is some clutter left lying around on her desk in the corner. The space is open, and a bright atmosphere fills the room.

"This is a nice place," Shiratori says.

The four of them, the inspector, Hattori, Shiratori's assistant Fujimaki, and Shinichi settle down at Nakano-sensei's dining room table. Since she is living in a place with an open kitchen, it also serves as separation of the cooking area and the living room. Opposite from Shinichi, there is a large window that overlooks the city. The flat can't be cheap, he thinks.

"Thank you. I moved here when I started to work at the center, so I didn't need to ride the train for long hours every week," Nakano-sensei replies.

"How long have you been working at the center?" Shiratori asks.

"For nearly four years now," Nakano-sensei answers.

"And your responsibilities are...?" Shiratori prompts.

"Well, as I said yesterday, I mainly work with out of house patients. Guides, that are struggling with how to work with Sentinels and need to gather experience in guiding. And sometimes, I man the emergency desk, too, if they urgently need someone to cover a shift," she explains.

"What does your treatment of those Guides look like? How exactly are you helping them?" Shinichi pipes up, curious.

"You are a Guide, too, aren't you?" she asks him.

He nods. It's pretty clear, with his mind still exuding the gentle sounds of the same song as in the cafe at the station, probably just to spite him. He isn't trying to hide it today, his status being common knowledge. It's pleasant to not bother with keeping your defenses up all the time. While rather unobtrusive, to a trained Sentinel, his status will be clear.

"Then I'd probably reach out like this," she says, demonstrating it by opening her mind and sending a tendril of a delicate connection towards Shinichi.

It's a small opening, an outstretched hand he could take to tap into her senses like he did with Kaito or Hattori before.

"Could you describe how that feels? The both of us are Neutrals, and Hattori-san is a Sentinel, if I'm correct," Shiratori requests.

Shinichi complies.

"We could probably align our minds this way, and I could learn how to work with her senses, prompt them to sharpen or lessen," he says.

"Yes, exactly. Do you want me to show you how it works?" she asks.

"No, thank you, I think I get the gist of it," Shinichi declines, well aware he probably wouldn't be able to hide the fact that he is bonded from her if he did link his mind to hers.

He asks instead, "Isn't that type of connection a strain on a Sentinel? As far as I know, you prefer not to connect with many different people because it can impair your mental balance."

"I'm fairly good at keeping mine, and I'm not bonded, so I am predestined for the job," Nakano-sensei replies, giving him a weak smile that lets him know she is aware of the downside to the work.

"How do you keep your balance?" Hattori asks her.

"Not by taking drugs," she replies quietly, averting her eyes. "Meditation helps me. Focusing on my breathing, imagining steady patterns, or counting even. You need things with a certain frequency, a regularity, to steady you."

"Your colleague, Ito-sensei, mentioned there were different beliefs within the center with regards to medication as a means to regulate the senses. Can you tell us more about that?" Shiratori asks.

"Not really, I'm afraid. I'm still fairly new and not as deeply immersed in SGO politics as she is. I would never use that kind of medication myself, but where all else fails and you're talking about a patient with a dangling bond that might kill them, I see why some people disagree," Nakano-sensei replies.

"And did you observe anything on the day of the murder? Your office is only two doors from Yamada-sensei's, isn't it?" Shiratori asks.

"I left for a dentist appointment that afternoon. I was gone from about a quarter to five until half past six, so I can't help you there, either, as I said before," she replies.

"You didn't notice anything before you left?" Hattori asks.

"I heard him greeting a sales representative before I left, I think. It must have been around four-thirty. At least that's what I thought he did when his door opened and closed and there was a male voice speaking to him," she says, eyebrows knitted together and her brown eyes behind the dark frames of her glasses unsure.

There isn't more information to gain from her, they notice, after asking a few more questions.

"Thank you very much for your assistance," Shiratori says as they take their leave.

"Have you already learned whom he was meeting with that afternoon?" Hattori asks when the four of them are out of the building.

"Yes. He wrote it down, luckily. We've contacted the both of them and invited them to the station for questioning. They are going to be there tomorrow," Shiratori says.

"When did they come to meet him? Do the times match Nakano-sensei's claim?" Shinichi asks, curious.

"Yes," Shiratori replies.

"The first was supposed to be there from 16:30 to 17:15, and the second one from 17:15 to 18:00," Fujimaki interjects, checking his notebook.

"If the second guy really came during that time, that would create an alibi for Nakano-sensei," Shiratori muses.

"Do you consider her a suspect, then?" Shinichi asks.

"Not yet. She might have had more insight into patient information due to filling shifts at the emergency desk, but so far, there's nothing else that ties her to these cases. None of her patients have ever been affected, and she only registered one out of the by now five known and five suspected cases," Shiratori replies.

Shinichi nods. That aligns with the information he and Hattori already have. The four of them separate after exchanging the directions to the second doctor's house.

After a short ride, they meet Ito-sensei at her home, as well. It's a bit farther from the center, a small but neat apartment building. Her flat is of a generous size, and she isn't living there alone.

"My partner is out, doing some shopping for the celebrations tonight," she informs them as the four of them settle on the firm leather couch and armchairs around her coffee table.

Her mind reminds Shinichi of Haibara, with its smooth surface. She, however, doesn't use a mixture of colors and textures, as Haibara does, but instead seems to be wrapped in water, neither cold nor hot, flowing around her like an impenetrable wall.

The room is the antithesis to Nakano-sensei's living room in terms of coloring, with dark wooden furniture lining the walls and deep red colors accentuating it. It is of a high quality, Shinichi notes, but it feels a little oppressive. The flat is located on the ground floor, the windows of the room overlooking the garden. The only thing that the two women have in common in their styles is a penchant for a little chaos, what with the random assortment of trinkets, strewn across the surfaces.

Shiratori repeats the standard questions, and they learn that Ito-sensei has been with the center for almost a decade after finishing her education.

"I've had some more stations than strictly necessary," she explains, saying she, among other things, worked as a free consultant for a while, before officially joining the center.

"Like Yamada-sensei, you work with Sentinels, don't you?" Shiratori says, checking his notes.

"I do. My treatment is mainly on counseling basis, though, and some demonstrations of how to work with a Guide. I don't treat Sentinels who aren't ready to bond or who have dangling bonds," Ito-sensei confirms.

"Do you do the same kind of hands-on demonstrations that Nakano-sensei does?" Hattori wants to know.

"No, not quite. My partner is rather sensitive, you see, so synchronizing with other Sentinels isn't something I can easily do. A bonded partner usually doesn't take too kindly to feeling the traces of somebody else on the mind of their Sentinel or Guide," she says.

Shinichi nods. In general, that is true, as the intrusion into your bonded one's mind feels quite similar to an intrusion into your own.

"Have you ever worked with medication?" he asks her.

There is an almost imperceptible ripple going through the watery barriers of Ito-sensei, before she shakes her head. If Shinichi weren't as good of a Guide as he is, he wouldn't have caught it. As it is, he is certain she lied.

She confirms Nakano-sensei's statement that the first one of the two appointments of Yamada-sensei's arrived on time, but she was in a session from five o'clock to six, thus being unable to say whether the second one did, as well.

"It seems like we'll have to wait for the two sales representatives to learn more," Shiratori says, when the four of them are once more outside, standing in the cold December air. The sky is gray, but so far, there has been no fresh snow.

"You should look into her background more closely," Shinichi advises the officer, "for both of them, of course, but hers especially. She has worked with medication before. She lied when we asked her about it."

Shiratori's eyes widen. "How do you know?"

"A flaw in her barriers," Shinichi replies.

Shiratori nods. "Alright, we'll look into it."

The questioning has barely taken one and a half hours, drive included, so it's only a little after twelve-thirty. Hattori and Shinichi stop for some take-out food on their way to the former's flat. Thankfully, there is no incident this time, so after they arrive at Hattori's, Shinichi finally gets his first meal of the day, feeling decidedly light-headed at this point.

"So it boils down to the statement of those representatives," Hattori says around a mouthful of ramen.

Shinichi chooses to finish chewing first and swallows, before replying, "I think so. It's possibly going to give us information as to when the crime was committed, but it's also giving us two more suspects."

"You're thinking they might be related to the fabrication of the drug?"

"Yes. So far, we've only dealt with those in charge of the patient treatment, but there's got to be a manufacturing side to things, as well," Shinichi says, wiping his mouth on a paper napkin from one of the plastic bags.

"I thought the same."

Shinichi gets up and fetches his briefcase. Too eager to finally fill his stomach, he left it at the Genkan upon returning. He puts it down on the chair next to him.

"If this is truly related to the research of that group from Toudai, we should go over these papers again, so we know what we're asking for. There might be a connection," he says, spreading the printed sheets across the table.

"Let's do it," Hattori says, tackling the task with his usual, boundless energy.



***



They make it to the university about ten minutes late, after getting somewhat too absorbed in theorizing, but the grovelling they prepared for turns out to be unnecessary. Their host receives them in the lab, right in the middle of conducting some experiments. In front of her, a couple of ferrets move in a cage.

"Welcome, please excuse my distraction," Matsuo Yuko says, straightening up and beaming at them.

She is a Guide, Shinichi notices, and if the vanilla aroma surrounding them is anything to go by, purely focused on smell. Hattori's eyes next to him widen slightly in surprise when he notices it.

"I wanted to finish some work before my break and got caught up."

"Don't worry, we're well aware of what it's like to be a little too absorbed in your work," Shinichi replies with a smile, adding an apology for being late.

She just waves it away.

"Did you know that ferrets display a weak form of Sentinel senses?" she asks, apropos nothing.

"I didn't," Hattori replies, and Shinichi, too, shakes his head.

"It's a rather new discovery. These two are a pair. The slightly smaller one is the Sentinel, the other its partner. The dynamics are quite similar to us humans. It opens a whole wealth of opportunities to test treatments for those who can't cope with their senses," Matsuo says excitedly.

"Are you working with chemicals?" Shinichi asks her.

"No," she shakes her head, "we used to, or rather, my predecessors did, but since Murata-senpai left, we don't anymore. That research proved to be too dangerous, and Professor Shimomura decided to put the chair's focus elsewhere. I'm working with stimuli. Flashes of light at a certain interval, small electric shocks on a level so low they don't hurt, short acoustic signals at a very high or low frequencies, that kind of thing."

"I read the name Murata on many papers regarding a certain compound that your chair used to investigate," Hattori remarks.

"Ah, yes. They called it the GABA-agent, didn't they?" Matsuo says. "It was very promising. But even in the first trial stages, we observed the dangers of it. The citric acid cycle is not something you should mess with. It was the very same Murata-senpai, who pointed that out after a few experiments. Other colleagues, however, weren't quite convinced by that, trying to find a way to balance it. When the professor made his decision with regards to stop working on that research topic, two people even left the chair in protest."

"Was Murata among them?" Shinichi asks.

"No. Murata left the chair a year before, after handing in a ground-breaking thesis. I'm not sure what came afterwards. It's a shame, how some great scientists just disappear after their PhD," Matsuo sighs.

"Who left, then?" Hattori asks.

"Ota-san and Kaneko-san," Matsuo says, but doesn't explain further, eyes glued once more to her ferrets.

Shinichi notes down the names.

"I'm sure you heard about the new drug circulating among Sentinels?" Hattori asks in the meanwhile.

Matsuo shakes her head. "I'm afraid I've been quite holed up in here."

Hattori quickly fills her in. The sweet smell takes on the hint of something sharp, and the light atmosphere in the lab darkens.

"That does sound like the compound the chair developed," Matsuo says, frowning.

"If possible, could you send us the contact details of your former co-workers, so we can reach out to them for questioning?" Shinichi asks her, handing her a piece of paper with his email address and phone number.

"Certainly," she nods.

"I don't assume you can think of anything else that might help us out here?" Hattori asks.

"Unfortunately, I know next to nothing about the agent, so no, not on that. What I know, however, is that Ota-senpai, especially, was hellbent on developing a medicine based on it. Kaneko-senpai was a little less eager and wanted to take more time researching it, but Ota-senpai wanted it approved yesterday. He was even willing to risk his reputation as a researcher for it, pursuing it despite everyone else thinking it too risky."

Shinichi nods. "If anything else comes to mind, let us know."

Matsuo accompanies them to the exit, wishing them a good start into the new year, and promises to be in touch. Hattori and Shinichi walk silently back to the parking lot, both lost in their thoughts. Shinichi still can't shake off the sound of 'Little Wing' in his head.

"You think those guys are behind what's happening right now?" Hattori finally asks when they are almost at his bike.

"Difficult to say. So far, neither of these names has popped up in our investigations," Shinichi says.

"That doesn't mean anything, though. Probably more background checks for us to run," Hattori sighs.

Shinichi nods. "We should send a transcript of this interview to the police."

"And the three names she mentioned, especially," Hattori agrees.

"It's kind of suspicious that this Murata just up and vanished after handing in such a stellar work," Shinichi muses.

"This whole thing is suspicious. I think division one should try to get an interview with the professor himself. I still don't see why he delegated us to his most likable employee," Hattori grouses.

"That's true. This is weird."

"Well, let's see how it pans out. I can take you back to my place, Kudou, but I won't do the trip around to yours. I've got a train to catch," Hattori replies, putting on his helmet.

"That's no problem at all. I'm looking forward to going for a walk, anyway," Shinichi smiles and gets on Hattori's bike behind his friend.

Chapter 16: Adagietto

Notes:

Hi there!
I hope you're all doing well. Here we are again. I'm rather excited about this one, I've got to admit. But as always, I'd like to just take a moment to say thank you to all of you who read my story or even leave a kudo and a comment. I'm probably always going to be amazed by the support this story is getting. Your kind words and your thoughts never fail to make me smile :)

Chapter Text

Shinichi casts his eyes across the crowd gathered in the floodlit front yard of the temple. Inspector Nakamori hasn't been a cheapskate in putting together a last minute welcome team for KID. Despite the short time of preparation, the open space in front of the temple is illuminated in a way that makes it impossible for even a mouse to sneak in unnoticed.

In the truss of the building, Shinichi spots three officers guarding the medium-sized bell that is supposed to be today's prize. Next to them is a priest, who is responsible for striking it before midnight. They all look a little worse for wear, probably having endured some rigorous cheek-pinching to get to this point. Shinichi can't help but feel sorry for them and their many colleagues who are gathered here in order to protect the bell. They probably had different plans for today. Shinichi just hopes they will be able to leave swiftly after all of this is over.

He himself is ensconced by people from every side, people he doesn't know and who are in much better spirits than the poor police officers, seeing as they are treated to a Kaitou KID show on New Year's Eve.

The word about the event taking place at Haido Park spread like a wildfire. Be it the news or the internet, it seems to have been the dominating topic, even overshadowing the gruesome reports of the new Sentinel drug. Shinichi is somewhat understanding. People crave news that are not entirely bad all the time, and KID is fun. His only regret is that he won't be able to actively participate in this heist, seeing as he as himself doesn't have the same rapport with Nakamori as Conan does.

His eyes drift up to the trees again. They are high and old, the ones surrounding the temple ground, gently rustling in the breeze that blows some of the snow from the last couple of days off their branches. They are even higher than the glow from inspector Nakamori's floodlights reaches. He focused them on the ground and the bell itself. Shinichi thinks that will prove to have been a lapse of judgment.

A couple of meters away an info booth is located, manned by the same group of people that stopped Shinichi and the Detective Boys on their walk through the park a few days prior. They distribute pamphlets and talk about the bell that is supposed to be stolen tonight. Shinichi recognizes one of them from yesterday's report; the one Kaito watched while Shinichi went over the case with Hattori on the phone.

"Quite frankly, I'd rather KID steals it," the girl says, her hands balled into fists. "This bell has been there for years; it's not something that should be sold so easily to a private investor!"

"We were trying to collect donations to buy it ourselves," a companion of hers explains to the lady currently talking to the two, "but we didn't gather enough, by far."

Shinichi moves over to their stall while pulling his scarf and beanie further into this face. He hopes his features aren't quite as recognizable this way. So far, no one has addressed him at least. Rummaging through his pockets, he pulls out his wallet and takes out a bill, which he puts into the box for donations on their desk.

"Thank you, sir! Do you want to sign your name in order to get a receipt, as well?" the delighted girl next to the box asks.

"No, that's alright," Shinichi smiles and returns to his former position to the side of the crowd.

"Let's hope that this anonymous tip pans out. Wouldn't have known for the life of me where to go with that heist note," he hears Nakamori grumble, as he draws close to him on his hike through the masses.

Shinichi keeps to the left of the area, further away from the temple and closer to the police van that houses the communication devices of the force. Nakamori is currently standing in front of it, fuming, as he usually is, crossing and uncrossing his arms nervously.

"We should know within ten minutes," a colleague of his tells him.

"Eight minutes and forty-three seconds, to be precise."

Shinichi's eyes widen in surprise as he watches Hakuba step out of the van, dressed in a warm-looking green parka and matching scarf.

"Whatever," Nakamori growls, "this better not be a waste of my time!"

"I don't think so. The note appeared to be genuine, even though this isn't his typical target," Hakuba says, moving towards the temple. "Do you mind me checking the safety measures one last time?"

Nakamori gives his assent in the most mean-spirited way he can muster before disappearing into the van. Shinichi watches Hakuba enter the temple and a short while later reappear on the balcony below the truss, inspecting the banister carefully.

Shinichi's gaze returns to the trees. The bond is silent in the back of his mind, almost shut completely. They have never managed to close it off quite as tightly without it affecting one or the other. Indeed, it is taking a toll on Shinichi already. His nerves are oddly raw, and his rhythm is erratic once more. There is a strange feeling radiating from the bond, a certain numbness underneath a single-minded focus that Shinichi can't decode. He wonders how KID will manage under these circumstances.

The audience of the heist begins the preparation for the New Year, handing out drinks and small confetti guns, as the time moves towards midnight. Next to Shinichi, a family is unpacking food and tea on a picnic blanket. Shinichi looks down in surprise and catches the mother's eyes.

"Oh, I'm sorry, don't mind us, please," she says with a smile, "we don't want to get in your way watching the show."

Shinichi assures her they aren't and asks politely whether they regularly participate in KID's heists.

"No, not at all. We're here because of the bell. It has a really unique sound, you see, and we like listening to it while greeting the new year," she says, offering him to sit down with them and even passing Shinichi a cracker, which he accepts with some difficulty due to his gloves.

"Have you been to a heist before, Onii-san?" one of her two daughters asks him.

"Now and again," Shinichi replies.

"Do you know why KID wants to take the bell away? Isn't he a bad person that just takes other people's things? Why do so many people like him?" her sister questions.

"Well, he always returns the things he takes," Shinichi points out, "and I think he never takes them without reason. Sometimes he even does it to help people."

"So he'll bring the bell back?" the younger one asks, hopeful.

"I think so," Shinichi smiles.

"Then he isn't a bad person," the older one says, satisfied.

"No," Shinichi replies, "he's not a bad person, at all."

They are interrupted by a sweet, melancholic chime. The crowd falls silent as one, all of them listening to the beautiful sound of the bell. It's as haunting as Shinichi remembers it from the night before, seemingly filling the empty space with clear, humming notes. He looks up to see the priest moving the wooden beam once more. The bell chimes again, and still, the magic is unbroken, holding on when it sounds yet again, and again, the full 108 times, until the last stroke reverberates in the air. Not a single person utters a word, everyone stunned and breathless. Into the perfect silence, a loud voice calls

"ONE, TWO, THREE!"

With a deafening explosion, KID appears right on top of the temple's roof, just above the bell.

Chaos breaks loose as the police scramble into motion.

"Ladies and gentlemen! A happy New Year to all of you! I hope you enjoyed the opening act by tonight's star of the show," the thief calls into the crowd.

There are cheers now, confetti guns going off and a smattering of applause resounding around Shinichi.

"I'll be taking the bell now, thank you very much!" KID calls, and with a snap of his fingers, his target explodes into very familiar vibrant orange and pink tinsel, interlaced with wisps of fake snow.

Shinichi can't help but bury his face in his gloved palms. When he watches again, the officers that have guarded KID's target are out cold, and KID is still perched on the rooftop, smirking widely and holding up the real bell.

"It has been an honor, as always, Inspector Nakamori! I'll take my leave now!" he sings, and disappears in a flash of light and smoke, just before an enraged Hakuba can make his way through the veritable mountain of tacky Christmas decoration to the rooftop.

Shinichi sees a glider taking off into the night sky, but he doesn't let that distract him from the low whirring sound of a grappling hook above. With a quick nod and a thank you, he takes his leave from the family and hurries between the trees. He hasn't even put a hundred meters between himself and the temple ground, when an arm shoots out and reaches for him, covered completely in black.

"Now what do we have here?" Kaito's voice whispers in his ear.

Shinichi turns and takes the other in. They really are the same height like this. Kaito's eyes are indiscernible in the darkness surrounding them. The bond is still closed off, but the hand on Shinichi's arm is shaking slightly. The thief isn't wearing much. His black clothes are made for function more than comfort, and the gloves on his hands are thin, offering more grip but less warmth.

"What the hell are you thinking, you stupid thief, running around like this with temperatures below zero?" Shinichi hisses, taking off his scarf and wrapping it around the other. "Besides, this was absolutely lazy of you, taking the bell at an earlier time and replacing it by this sorry version of a piñata you somehow came up with. I'm kind of embarrassed no one noticed!"

"Now, now, detective, I even went through the trouble of recording the sound and hiding a device to replay it within that 'sorry version of a piñata', you know? That was hard to time with the strokes of that monk," Kaito replies, and Shinichi thinks he might be pouting.

Still, something about him is decidedly off.

"Yes, sure," he replies, exchanging Kaito's baseball hat with his beanie and pulling the hood of his jacket up to cover his own head. "Why don't you do me a favor and open the link? I already know something is wrong, and I'd like to know what."

Kaito's breath catches, and he hesitates a second before complying. A cacophony of sounds assaults Shinichi so suddenly he almost sways in his spot. There is hardly any underlying rhythm detectable in the mess that are Kaito's shields. If it weren't for the bond, Shinichi realizes, Kaito would be zoning now.

"You idiot! What is the big idea in running around like that? If I closed up the connection anymore from my end, you would've dropped out of the sky like a stone," Shinichi hisses.

With the bond open, he manages to call up his Air and wrap the both of them into his safe barriers, pulling them around KID like a warm blanket. The thief is visibly relaxing next to him, the faint trembles fading, replaced by a world-weariness he is way too young for.

"Thank you," he murmurs.

"Don't mention it. Where have you put that bell?"

"Next to Nakamori's van," Kaito answers.

"Good. Then we're out of here," Shinichi decides and pulls Kaito home along with him.



***



They don't speak on their way back. Kaito doesn't question the direction Shinichi takes. Shinichi keeps the thief's hand clasped in his own. They are no longer an adult and a child, but they still don't garner any questioning looks, not even for Kaito's clothing. Shinichi lets his Guide's aura roam free, so their situation just screams 'Guide helping his distressed Sentinel' at others.

Since the Haido Park isn't far from Shinichi's home, he decides to take them there. With Akai no longer living in his house, it's abandoned once more, and cold. Shinichi activates the heating, well aware it will take time to start up. So he also grabs a pile of blankets and throws them over the uncommonly quiet KID, who simply stays where Shinichi has settled him down, on the small couch in the corner of the library.

Shinichi busies himself in the kitchen for a moment, rifling through the cabinets for some tea and sugar. There is almost nothing left in them, but he at least manages to prepare this much, while getting himself a mug of black coffee. Putting everything on a tray, he carries it back into the library, puts it down on the low table by the sofa and takes a seat next to Kaito. He lifts the blanket and shifts closer to his Sentinel, who has begun to shiver once more in his absence. Insecure, Shinichi reaches for the other's hand with his now ungloved one. Kaito instantly grasps it and laces their fingers.

"Thank you," he whispers again, when Shinichi passes him the mug with his free hand.

He takes a sip from it before placing it on the table next to his side of the sofa.

Shinichi fiddles with his own cup.

"What's wrong? What happened?"

He keeps on trying to share his calm with the man next to him who can't seem to find his own.

"I..." Kaito starts, and then stops. He sighs and sinks further into the cushions, leaning heavily against Shinichi. "Can you just talk to me for a bit?"

"What do you want to hear about?" Shinichi asks.

"Your day. Just... Anything. I want to hear your voice," Kaito murmurs.

Shinichi would rather listen to his. KID's voice is so much smoother, much more musical than his own. But he obliges and starts to talk about everything that happened yesterday, which has, admittedly, been a lot, seeing as it's past midnight and this monster of a day seems insistent on dragging on into tomorrow.

Kaito just listens, never even interrupts to ask any questions, and Shinichi can feel him wind down next to him until his body finally goes completely lax and a familiar latin beat drifts across the bond again.

"I like how you speak," Kaito says, when Shinichi falls silent. "Your voice is always so calm and concise, and you're good at finding the right words for the right audience. You always take into account whom you're talking to."

"I used to be different. But finding yourself more than halved in size tends to change things up," Shinichi murmurs, feeling a little uncomfortable with the praise.

"Yeah, I can imagine. It just about turns everything upside down, doesn't it?"

The odd thing is how, while anybody might say something along those lines, in KID's words rings more than just a theoretical understanding. There aren't many people who know the feeling of your world being upended from one day to another. It's exactly the kind of emotion that Kaito is projecting over the bond now.

"It does," Shinichi replies quietly, "but I don't regret it. I know I did the right thing, in the end. Even if there were sacrifices to be made."

"How can you be so sure?" Kaito asks.

There is something morose in his voice. It tastes like heartache.

"It saved countless lives, I guess. That's the highest thing a detective can ever aspire to, isn't it?" Shinichi replies.

"Yeah, probably," Kaito says, followed by a short silence. "Aoko told me she is tired of waiting for me."

Shinichi knows those words. He has heard them in his nightmares. He has read them in Ran's eyes. Saw them in her desolate features after yet another incident where he slipped away, so close, and yet out of reach. She has never told him as straight forward as this, but she didn't have to, and she has come near enough. He felt this pain before. He knows there is nothing he can say or do to make it better. So he remains quiet and lets the bond convey what he thinks. It's better than words, anyway. For once, he is glad to have it.

"Oh Meitantei, don't be so sad on my behalf. It's my fault, not yours," Kaito murmurs.

"Is there anything else to feel then?" Shinichi asks him, voice just as low.

"No, I guess there isn't, is there?" Kaito sighs.

Shinichi doesn't speak. He isn't sure his consolation is what the other needs now. Kaito just stays where he is, propped up against Shinichi and smothered in blankets. Shinichi hasn't bothered with the lamps in the library; they are only getting some dim illumination falling in from the corridor. Shinichi finds the darkness oddly reassuring. It's easier to be honest without the merciless electric light exposing all of your failures.

"I don't think I was a good friend to Ran," he finally confesses, "and I would've probably been an even worse boyfriend. If I ever had the chance to truly be one."

"Why?" Kaito asks.

"It's not because I couldn't be there for her all the time. It's not because I'm always off to solve another case. She knows me and liked me regardless. It's that I don't see her in all of this. I never saw her next to me. Partly, because she doesn't want to be, and I don't want her constantly surrounded by death and crime. But partly, because I felt afraid for her, because I didn't believe she could stand her ground. I tried to protect her without even asking her if she needed me to. That's why it couldn't have worked," he replies quietly.

"Aoko told me she didn't need my protection rather clearly," Kaito says, and there is a lot of bitterness in his voice, but it's not directed at Nakamori-san.

"You could still try to work on it, you know? Go meet her halfway. Try not to make the same mistakes I did," Shinichi mumbles.

He doesn't want to lecture Kaito, but he also doesn't like to see him this dejected. It doesn't suit him.

"Can I tell you a story, Shinichi?" Kaito asks.

Shinichi just nods. Kaito probably doesn't see it in the darkness, but they are pressed up close enough that he must feel the movement through Shinichi's body. So he begins to tell Shinichi the story of Kuroba Touichi, magician extraordinaire by day and phantom thief by night. He talks about how he had a run-in with an organization that wanted for him to steal a certain kind of diamond.

"It's said to grant you immortality. I've got no idea whether I even believe in it, but if it were true, I'm sure they aren't the kind of people that should have it," Kaito tells him, his beautiful voice sounding as if it's coming from far away. "He didn't want to help them, either. So they killed him. He died in an accident on stage, or at least that's the official version."

"When did you learn about it?" Shinichi asks.

"When I was sixteen. I found a secret room that he left me, and some old recordings for me to listen to when I was old enough. Ever since then, I've been searching."

"For the diamond and the people who killed your father," Shinichi murmurs.

"Yes. I found them, too. Had a couple of confrontations with them. But it hasn't taken me any closer to my goal. And as long as they're still out and about..."

"You're going to keep on being KID," Shinichi completes for him.

"Yes," Kaito confirms, sitting up and facing Shinichi.

"I understand," Shinichi replies.

His eyes have gotten used to the darkness and find Kaito's effortlessly. They look gray in this light, gray like storm clouds, sadness, and secrets.

"Why is it that I find it so easy to tell this to you and not to Aoko?" Kaito whispers, his hand clutching Shinichi's underneath the blankets for support.

"For the same reason you knew about my identity and my enemies before Ran did, when we weren't even connected, I guess," Shinichi replies, "because we already know what it's like, don't we?"

Kaito is quiet for a moment, just keeps looking at Shinichi.

"I thought that looking at you in your real body would be like looking into a mirror," he says, "but you actually look quite different, don't you? Your hair is darker, your face a little more narrow, your eyes a completely different shade of blue."

"I know," Shinichi says.

"How come we're still so similar, then?"

"That doesn't have anything to do with our looks," Shinichi argues, lifting an eyebrow.

"Still, you can feel what I feel," Kaito says, and there is a small smile on his lips.

It's a sad one.

"I'm your Guide. Of course I can. But yeah, even if I weren't, I'd still know," Shinichi admits quietly.

Something passes between them. It's at once tiny and monumental. For the first time, Shinichi understands why the bond between them has snapped into place so easily.

Looking at Kaito, feeling him, is almost like looking into a mirror. There is so much about them that is the same it's dizzying, and the possibility of finding someone who might be ready to jump down even the most dubious of rabbit holes with him is making Shinichi's heart speed up. KID is someone he has come to trust over the years. Kaito is someone he has come to like over the short span of a couple of weeks. Combined, Shinichi realizes, that is a powerful mixture of emotions, threatening to overwhelm him. His gaze falls on Kaito's lips, before searching his eyes again, finding the other doing the same.

"Maybe we-" Shinichi starts, making to pull back, to break the moment before he does something stupid that he can't take back.

"Yeah," Kaito says, looking away for a second, then meeting Shinichi's eyes again.

He doesn't mean it. Shinichi doesn't, either. He is well aware that neither of them has taken the time to think about what they feel. There is just this recognition guiding them; a truth that seems bigger than them.

"This is probably a mistake," Shinichi tries weakly.

"I don't think one more is going to matter now, quite frankly," Kaito whispers.

Then he proceeds to lean in and kiss Shinichi's breath away.

Chapter 17: Vivacissimo

Notes:

Hi there!
I hope you've had a good week so far. I want to thank you all for your support and your comments on last week's chapter, it was lovely, once again :) We're at the metaphorical crossroads of this story now, I'd say, so I'm very curious what you'll think of this chapter, as well. Thank you for reading, and take care.

Chapter Text

Of all the good moments to be kissing your Guide for the first time, this isn't one. Kaito shouldn't be doing this. Not with his head and heart both in complete disarray, not when he is still in shock from Aoko's rejection, not when he only just realized that what he feels for Shinichi might be more than grudging respect and a kinship he hasn't got with anybody else. Shinichi is too precious to be used as a cheap, quick comfort, too important to be a fill-in for something else Kaito can't have. And Kaito truly believes he isn't, at least in his heart, but his head is screaming things at him that leave him not quite as convinced.

It's useless, though, all of his inner agonizing, because once they start, neither of them can stop. Shinichi is hungry, and Kaito is ravenous. They clash again and again, and it doesn't feel like anything Kaito has ever felt before. He is trembling all over as he wraps a shaking arm around Shinichi's waist while Shinichi's own arm snakes around his shoulder. They are both pulling each other in, further and further, like two opposite magnetic forces that snap together with an unstoppable momentum.

Kaito's heart is beating too fast in his chest, and the blood is rushing in his ears. He is keeping his eyes closed, frightened that any visual sensation might overwhelm him with his other senses already firing away, his ears catching the low gasps of Shinichi's breath and the rustling of fabric around them, his skin feeling every point of contact, every ounce of Shinichi's warmth so acutely it might as well burn, and his mouth tasting a mixture of coffee and Shinichi that is downright intoxicating.

Their tongues are dancing the age-old dance so many others did before them, only now, Kaito thinks, he gets what it means. It's like the tide, coming in and retreating, seemingly gentle waters lapping against the shore and eating away at it until it crumbles into the sea, just like Kaito's defenses come crashing down as he realizes that this Guide, this detective, Shinichi is someone he truly wants. As a friend, a partner, even a lover, if he is given the chance. He shouldn't be learning it like this, but Kaito is so hopelessly lost and so achingly lonely that he can't stop.

Shinichi pulls him into a firm hug, separating their mouths for a moment in favor of pressing his forehead to the junction of Kaito's neck and shoulder. He is so warm and so heartbreakingly kind Kaito wants to cry.

"I'm so sorry," he whispers, and Kaito can hear his heartbeat, just as quick as his own, matching his. "I shouldn't do this to you. I shouldn't take advantage of you when you're so sad."

Kaito hugs him back just as tightly. "You aren't. If anything, it's me who should apologize. I shouldn't be doing this right now, but I..."

Kaito knows he doesn't need to complete this sentence. Shinichi will know how he feels either way. The bond is wide open between them, and it's pulling and tightening and growing, an imponderable power bringing them together, too. At some point, Kaito knows, he has got to find the words, owes them to Shinichi. But right now they aren't there, and Kaito doesn't have the strength to go and look for them.

Shinichi understands. He lifts his head and finds first Kaito's eyes, then his mouth again. It's sweet, the way he kisses him, chaste almost, until his lips open. There is a question in each movement, an 'Is this alright?' pressed into Kaito's skin, and all he can return is a resounding yes. Yes, it's good, yes, it's exactly what he needs, and yes, he is going to regret this, but not because of Shinichi, never because of him.

They fall asleep in a tangled mess of limbs on the sofa, their coffee and tea long forgotten, Kaito on top of Shinichi, buried in a heap of blankets. It's warm and it's comfortable, despite the crick in his neck, despite numb arms and sharp bones pressing against their unyielding counterparts through rumpled clothes. Shinichi's arm slung across his waist makes up for it; Shinichi's breath in his ear is more than enough compensation.



***



Kaito wakes up on his side, facing a sleeping detective. The sun is streaming in through the large windows, the sky cloudless for the first time in weeks. His conscience is heavy, but he himself is warm to the core. For the first time in a long time, he doesn't feel alone, at all.

Shinichi's eyes blink awake under Kaito's sleepy stare. Indigo irises slowly drift into focus and a soft smile laced with the same sense of guilt spreads on his face.

"You're still here," Shinichi whispers.

Kaito's heart breaks a little. "I wouldn't just leave you."

Something seems to click between them, as the bond expands with might, falling into place like puzzle pieces, strong and inseparable. It has stabilized, Kaito realizes.

"Oh," Shinichi breathes, as the soft tendrils of his Guide senses test the connection.

Kaito can feel what he feels and swallows heavily upon sensing where they are glued together, stuck together.

"This seems rather sturdy," he tries.

"Cast in cement, more like," Shinichi replies in his habitual dry tone.

A surprised chuckle escapes Kaito's mouth.

"I think we severely underestimated this," he says.

"Haibara is going to have a field day," Shinichi groans.

His arm is still on Kaito's waist, though, and Kaito can't help but put his own around the detective and pull him in.

"It's going to be okay," he murmurs into Shinichi's ear.

Shinichi's voice is subdued when he replies. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," Kaito confirms with all the assurance he can find within himself.

It's a surprisingly great amount. He can feel Shinichi smile against his cheek.

They drift into the day slowly, to the pace of Shinichi's Air. Shinichi has to meet inspector Shiratori for the questioning of the wife of the dead physician from the center. He also wants to join him afterwards at the headquarters for the interrogation of the two sales representatives Yamada-sensei met on the afternoon of his murder. That is only going to happen later on, though, so the two of them have the morning to themselves.

Shinichi tells Kaito he is going to change back into Conan tomorrow morning, and Kaito thinks he has to make the most of the fact that they are the same height now. He is quite unable to keep himself from sneaking a touch here and there, feeling those big hands in his, or wrapping his arms around Shinichi's waist.

Once he began, he quickly notices hugging Shinichi is as addictive as watching that beautiful blush spread across his features. He can't stop. Kaito wonders how he missed all the signs before. In hindsight, the easy trust between them, the way they kept on drifting closer and closer, is painfully obvious.

Shinichi smiles at him from across the breakfast table they set after they returned from a grocery store and stocked up Shinichi's hopelessly neglected kitchen. There is a cup of cocoa sitting in front of Kaito. Shinichi has dropped the box of sweet powder into their cart unprompted, even though Kaito knows for a fact that the other prefers coffee as black as the soul of those terrible organizations the both of them are tied to in the most unfortunate ways. It's these small attentions, just like how Shinichi wrapped Kaito in his scarf yesterday after the heist, which make Kaito's heart swell.

"Do you have any plans for the day?" Shinichi asks.

Kaito returns his smile. "Not really. Maybe stop by Jii's place and say hi again, maybe call my mom. I'd like to be with you in the evening, though, if that's alright.”

There's a wave of happiness, tinged with wonder coming from Shinichi, as he replies, "Sure, I'll be here."

"You don't have to be so surprised that I'd like to spend my time with you. I thought we both made it plenty clear we appreciate the other being around," Kaito can't help but tease him.

The resulting blush in the detective's cheeks could leave a cherub envious.

"It's not like I've had time to get used to it. Stop saying these things. We both know it's not that simple."

"No, it's not," Kaito agrees, somewhat sobered, "but that doesn't mean it's not true."

"No," Shinichi murmurs, "it really doesn't."

Kaito reaches across the table with his free hand and puts it on top of Shinichi's, squeezing it in reassurance.

"I'll figure this out, Meitantei. I'll get it straight, I promise," he says.

"It's rather the question of whether it'll be straight or not," Shinichi replies after a heartbeat, leaving Kaito flabbergasted and blushing for once.

Shinichi smirks.

"That was pure evil, Shinichi, and I do take it personal," Kaito huffs, trying to snatch back his hand, but Shinichi is faster, turning his own and lacing their fingers.

It's too pleasant a feeling to make it stop.

"I'll try to do better by you in the future," Shinichi smiles.

Kaito chuckles. "Don't you worry, you're doing plenty good by me, darling. Let me sort this out, and then I'll return the favor."

"As long as you promise not to use any pet names on me," Shinichi groans, burying his burning face in his free hand.

Kaito chalks it up as a win.

He can't help but think how gracious Shinichi is. He isn't calling Kaito out on all the maybes, all the let's-sees between them; he isn't forcing Kaito to put all his cards on the table, to admit that half of his heart is still hung up on Aoko, has never known anything else and doesn't know how to deal with letting someone else inside. It's just that which makes the other half grow increasingly sure of this, of the fact that Shinichi, after all, might be it for him.

Maybe Shinichi is the one he can imagine by his side, because he is already there. Kaito didn't notice when it began, but now he can watch the change happening. It's astoundingly painful, yet cleansing. It's like getting to know himself for who he truly is. He wonders how he ended up knowing himself so little before.

The two of them spent the rest of their lazy morning together in the library. They stay huddled up against each other on the tiny couch under a heap of blankets, despite the heating having finally kicked in and the room no longer being a walk-in refrigerator. They both bask in the closeness of the other, letting the bond flare to life, senses and emotions cresting over them. The world has never been quite this detailed, this vibrant. Kaito feels tired and worn out, and yet alive like he never has.

They talk about books, comparing childhood favorites and bantering good-naturedly about the cultural worth of Sherlock Holmes and Arsène Lupin stories. They laugh about Hakuba's disgruntled face, Kaito finally getting to enjoy the lighthearted portion of yesterday in retrospect, especially, when he finds himself needled by Shinichi wanting to know how he got his hands on the professor's tinsel so quickly. Kaito is going to leave him guessing. It won't do to reveal all of his secrets.

Around noon, Shinichi drags out an old turntable of his father's, and the two of them work on getting it going again. It's in good shape, mostly, only needs some cleaning and being plugged into the amplifier Shinichi found with it, before hooking it up to the speakers.

"My dad wanted for this to be a multimedia room, but my mother thought those things belonged into the living room. Didn't stop him, though," he smirks.

"Our fathers would have probably gotten along well," Kaito says.

"They did, as far as I know. Your father was named by mine, after all," Shinichi laughs, and proceeds to tell Kaito about a delightful adventure he inadvertently went on with the original Kaitou KID.

"Imagine we had met then," Kaito says.

"Yeah, imagine that," Shinichi smiles.

Kaito wonders whether they would have gotten along. Probably not. Shinichi would have tried to see through every single one of Kaito's tricks and explain them to everybody else, and Kaito would have hated that. But it might have also driven him to reach new heights in trying to impress the other.

And who knows, sooner or later Kaito would have probably seen all the good sides there are to Shinichi, just like he does now. It might have simply taken time.

His eyes meet indigo ones, kind and smiling in the noon light. They sparkle in that impossible shade of blue that is so soft, where the lighter variations tend to look piercing, so warm, where the color is so often associated with something cold. Kaito's every cell is so caught up with him, so fascinated by what he discovered right by his side that he can't focus on anything else. His ears are filled with the sound of Shinichi's breath, his fingertips sense the warmth radiating from his skin, his eyes can't be torn from his face, and Kaito leans in across the record player between them on the carpet before he can stop himself. Shinichi doesn't pull back, his eyes drifting closed and his lips gently responding to Kaito's demanding ones, when a sudden noise from the door snaps them apart.

Shinichi acts quickly, jumping up to hide Kaito behind him.

"I've picked a bad time, haven't I," says the quiet voice of Shinichi's miniature scientist neighbor, who is presently appearing in the door frame.

Kaito doesn't need the input from Shinichi's fine-tuned empathy to know that she is in a state of distress.

"No," he answers in Shinichi's stead, "it's fine."

He throws a smoke bomb and changes behind its screen in a flash, donning his full costume so his features are hidden from her view.

"Sorry, Haibara, I was just surprised," Shinichi says quietly, not batting a lash at Kaito's actions. "Do you want to take this to the kitchen? We've got snacks and coffee."

"Coffee sounds good, actually," she replies, and it sounds rather grateful.

The three of them settle around the kitchen table with hot drinks, some tangerines and cookies, and an uncomfortable silence between them. Shinichi is still a little flushed, and even Haibara-san looks flustered, as if she isn't sure how to react to this. She takes a sip from her mug, clutching it in both of her small hands.

"What did you want to talk about?" Shinichi asks her.

She lifts her eyes and meets those of the Guide with an indecipherable mix of emotions in them. She feels like cut glass to Shinichi, cold and reflective, not giving away what is in her heart, trying to keep it in. Kaito can sense the other's worry through their bond almost as if it's his own. That girl, he realizes, is really important to Shinichi.

"I have to say goodbye to the kids," Haibara-san says and swallows. "I talked to Akai-san and discussed my options with him. He says it would be for the best if I went into witness protection for a few weeks. They apparently had another breakthrough in the case a couple of days ago, when they made that raid on a group of smugglers at the harbor. They were linked to one of their bigger labs. He says it probably won't take much more than a month to tie things up. But until then, if I want to start working and help people immediately, I have to go. So I'll need to say goodbye to them."

Kaito watches Shinichi watch her, sees how his eyes reflect her pain and his hands itch to comfort her but eventually don't. There is a distance and a politeness between them that seems to keep them apart like a veil, incredibly thin and yet such an immense barrier.

Kaito knows these things, has felt them in his life countless times. He thinks about what it was like last night, talking to Shinichi honestly, breaking through all the walls he constructed around himself and getting to finally see what it's like to not be a lone wolf for once. He gives Shinichi a simple nudge through their bond. Shinichi looks up, meets Kaito's eyes and seems to know what he is thinking. He sighs, straightens up, and reaches for Kaito's hand where it's resting on top of the table.

"I will be there with you, when you do it, I promise. If you'd like to, we can meet them tomorrow and tell them all about it. We can even tell them that you'll return at some point, even though it might be different. Once this case is finally wrapped up there's no need to lie anymore, is there? Not to our friends," he says calmly.

"Do you think they'd even believe us?" Haibara-san asks skeptically.

"I think they'll recognize us in any shape or form. Those kids know us. Names and ages are just signs and numbers, aren't they? Friendship can transcend that."

Haibara-san sighs. "You're incredibly optimistic for being surrounded by so many corpses on a regular basis, Kudou."

"It's Shinichi, Shiho," Shinichi replies quietly.

She stares at him for almost half a minute before her face breaks into the most brilliant smile Kaito has seen on her yet. It transforms her, makes her green eyes glow and her mind sparkle.

"Thank you, Shinichi," she says.

They accompany her to the door. Shinichi doesn't let go of Kaito's hand, and he won't admit how much it means to him to see this declaration of intent and commitment from his Guide.

"Take care of him," Haibara-san mouths at Kaito, when Shinichi is distracted by the mail lying on a table by the coat rack.

He nods solemnly back at her. When she is gone, Kaito changes out of costume again, and the two of them return to the library and their project, taking the untouched snacks and drinks along with them. Shinichi gives Kaito a slightly embarrassed smile, and Kaito returns a brighter one of his own.

The installation of the sound system proves more difficult than they originally assumed. They immerse themselves in their task so completely Shinichi has to leave in a hurry in order to make it to his appointments.

"I'll see you later," he tells Kaito and presses a quick peck to his cheek, when Kaito won't let go of his sleeve, trying to get in one last idea of what might be wrong with the amplifier and keep it from working as it should.

He leaves him in the doorway, slightly dumbfounded and with an army of butterflies in his stomach that don't quite know where to go. It only takes one sobering breath, however, for Kaito to remember there is a place he should be, a person he should talk to. He sighs and turns to Shinichi's wardrobe. There is no need to freeze to death on top of things, when he is already setting out to have one of the most difficult conversations in his life.



***



Kaito can't say what he expected to happen, but he isn't prepared for Aoko to simply invite him into her room without raising any fuss. She settles on the bed and leaves her desk chair to him. He feels like a sinner in church, hardly keeping it together. Shinichi's Air is far out of reach, and his own tango might prove a little too temperamental for this confrontation.

"I was wondering what to do if you didn't come here today," Aoko says.

"What would you've done?"

She shrugs. "I don't know. You're here, though."

"Yes," Kaito agrees.

He is. And then again, he isn't. She looks lovely, he thinks, healthier than yesterday, her cheeks having gained a little more color now. Her sky blue eyes look sad, though.

"So what now?" she asks him.

Kaito wishes he knew. But he doesn't, not really. He thinks of Shinichi, of his warm presence and simple understanding. Aoko asked him for the truth. A truth he still isn't ready to convey to her. There is a long list of things she should know but doesn't. Now, there is another thing to add on top of it. Unlike everything else, however, it feels like something that he can share. He takes a deep breath.

"Aoko, I love you. I've loved you for years. You're one of the most important people in my life. I don't think that'll ever change. Even if I make you wait, even if you never know where I'm off to next, I still care about you."

She just stares at him, quietly waiting for what she seems to know is yet to come.

"You were right when you said that I didn't give you a real chance to decide for yourself in that matter with the center. And you're right when you say it's not for me to decide when to protect you and when to let you face your troubles on your own. I've been blind and egoistic, and I'm sorry. But I can't promise you to change that. I can't promise you to always be honest with you. And I know that you don't deserve that."

"You're doing it again, you know? Here you are, deciding what's right for me and what isn't," Aoko whispers, but there are tears in her eyes now, and her voice sounds choked.

"I know. I can't help it. Besides, this is no longer just about myself," Kaito says.

He looks up and catches her eyes. "I'm a Sentinel, Aoko. And nearly three weeks ago I bonded with a Guide."

She is stunned into silence. He waits patiently until she recovers her voice. The tears never stop running down her cheeks, dripping onto the white fabric of the knitted sweater she is wearing and soaking into it, darkening the threads.

"Why did you keep it a secret?"

"Because I didn't want to go to the center and be bonded or medicated against my will. My parents had bad experiences with them and wanted to keep it under wraps," Kaito replies calmly.

It's part of the truth, even if not the entirety of it.

"But when I..." she starts and trails off.

Kaito doesn't need her to finish that sentence, though.

"I just couldn't tell you, Aoko. I'm sorry. I was too shocked, thinking that it would become impossible for us to be together once you came online. Which was wrong, as I should have known best. But I was so used to not talking about my status, I just didn't and left you hanging instead, even endangering you."

Aoko takes a moment to clear her throat before she speaks again. "Why did you bond with someone else?"

Kaito looks away for the first time since he started to speak to her. "It was an accident."

"An accidental bond?" she asks incredulously, and he nods. "But then you'll both want to separate again, don't you?"

"We did, in the beginning. But with the strength of the bond, I don't think we can, anymore. Not quickly, at least. And Aoko, I... I don't want to," Kaito confesses.

He can see her world collapse, when she connects the dots. It hurts more than he thought it would.

"You're falling in love with them.”

"Yeah," Kaito whispers.

Chapter 18: Intermezzo

Notes:

Hi!
It's me again. A little later than usual, but today is busy. So this chapter is sort of a break from all the emotional turmoil we've had in the last few chapters, so that we can finally work on wrapping up that case that's been going on. As always, I'd like to thank you all so much for your kind and encouraging feedback, you're awesome. Have a nice weekend!

Chapter Text

For the first time in years, Shinichi doesn't know what he is feeling. Ever since he came online as a Guide, interpreting and reading emotions has become second nature. Usually his own are his reference. He is used to know exactly where he is in his own emotional range, and he likes to keep that range narrow, to avoid feelings that can quickly turn overwhelming. He isn't the exuberant type, nor does he give too much room to the darker thoughts.

That is why he isn't used to the tingling sensation in his stomach pulling at the corners of his mouth, the spring to his step that just won't go. Shinichi could maybe describe what he feels as incredulity, amazement, and, last but not least, fear. It's not like he didn't know what was happening before, like he didn't guess his sentiments towards KID went through many different stages to finally arrive at the admiration and affection he feels now. Beyond all else, though, he can't help but be happy, so incredibly glad that Kaito allowed him to get this close to him knowing what Shinichi stands for, who he is.

Even if nothing comes out of this, even if Kaito decides in the end that he wants to be with Nakamori-san and not with Shinichi, it leaves him grateful and with the hope that maybe, maybe it's not impossible to find more people who think like him. There is Hattori, there is Haibara, and now there is Kaito, whom Shinichi is intent on keeping, no matter if as a friend or something else.

Still, it's nearly too much for him to come to terms with what happened last night, and he is sort of eager to get started on the case, if just to distract himself. He pulls up his barriers rigorously, flooding his mind with the sound of the Air in order to chase away any lingering confusion.

Shiratori is already waiting for Shinichi in front of the Yamada residence. It's a single-family home, standing detached from its neighbors within a pretty, well-kept garden. Fujimaki sends Shinichi an impatient look before turning to ring the doorbell. They are asked to enter swiftly.

The woman who opens the door for them clearly is some kind of housekeeper. She is in her forties, dressed in simple but functional clothes, and wears her black hair in a loose braid down her back.

"You'll excuse me for a moment," she says, after settling the three of them in the living room, and disappears into the corridor that she led them through before.

The house is eerily quiet. Shinichi casts a glance across the heavy wooden furniture. It looks expensive and massively made. All of it would be much better suited to a traditional Japanese home, but the house they are in is built in a decidedly western style.

They are seated by the low table in the middle of the living room for about five minutes before the mistress of the house finally enters. Shinichi is first struck by how slender she is. Her black kimono dwarfs her, making her fair complexion stand out even more against the dark color. Her Mofuku is in the traditional Japanese style and looks as out of place in the modern building as the furniture does.

Yamada-san glides into the room quietly and sits down at the table among them, all without uttering a word. Shinichi first thinks that she is a Neutral, until he catches a faint hum of senses underneath a wall of complacency and indifference, that marks her as a Sentinel. Her drawn looks make her appear older than she probably is.

Shiratori greets her politely and formally.

"I'm very sorry for your loss," he tags on.

She nods. "Thank you. It did come unexpected."

Shinichi is struck by the odd dissonance between what she is saying and the situation. She speaks and behaves as if her husband passed away from a sudden sickness. Her mind is strangely numb, and even though her perception should be sharper, it's Fujimaki, who first turns towards the housekeeper as she returns to bring them tea.

"Have you and your husband spoken about his situation at work much?" Shiratori goes on.

"No. We didn't talk about his work. It was of a confidential nature, after all."

Her speech is a little slowed, Shinichi notices, slurred ever so slightly around the edges.

"How did you meet your husband?" he asks her.

"I was his patient, once," she replies, an oddly incongruous smile on her face.

"Were you experiencing troubles with your senses? You are a Sentinel, aren't you?" Shinichi presses on.

She nods.

"Was he able to help you?"

A shadow crosses her face. It's so quick that Shinichi almost doesn't notice. Her feelings, though, remain carefully blank.

"He was," she says.

Shinichi is certain that is a lie. He reaches out a little further, carefully, gently probing her mind, but it's like the cold, impervious window facade of a modern high-rise, and his senses can't get through.

"Are you aware of any ties between your husband and a pharma lab or company?" Shiratori asks her next.

She laughs. It's a surprisingly rough sound, uncouth and callous. "Don't you know who I am, inspector? Doesn't my name ring a bell?"

Shinichi's eyes widen. "I chalked it up as a coincidence."

"Oh, no. My father is Yamada Hachirou, the heir to the Tou pharmaceutical group," she says.

"Have they ever worked together on any project?" Shiratori asks.

"I wouldn't know. They wouldn't talk to me about these things," she replies, uncaring.

The housekeeper, having stationed herself by the door, clears her throat.

"I think the Madam is tired," she says, "it's a hard time for her. Would you mind leaving us now?"

The three of them look up in surprise at the sudden dismissal. The housekeeper's formerly calm features display a certain stoniness now.

"We would have liked to have a look at his personal belongings, seeing as he was connected to the case of the new drug for Sentinels," Shiratori says, apparently hoping to get the permission by speaking candidly.

"Did you bring a search warrant?" the housekeeper asks.

Shiratori shakes his head.

"Then I'm afraid I can't let you do that, inspector. Besides, the Master is dead. You should not disturb his rest."

Shinichi casts a last glance at the petrified figure of Yamada-sensei's wife, before getting up to follow Shiratori and Fujimaki out of the room.

"Guide," the woman suddenly calls out when he is at the door.

Shinichi stops and turns. He is the only Guide in the room, so she must be speaking to him. "You noticed, didn't you? That I didn't speak the truth."

Shinichi faces her icy, brown gaze. "I did."

"Madam!" the housekeeper exclaims.

"I might as well tell you then," Yamada-san goes on, undeterred. "He wasn't able to help me. Not even a little bit."

She grins at him, an expression unfitting for her delicate features, making her face appear like a mask.

"Thank you," Shinichi replies quietly.

Her grin fades. Her eyes become serious, and she nods one time before turning away, while the frantic housekeeper ushers them out of the door.

"What was that all about?!" Fujimaki explodes once they are outside again.

"She clearly knows more than she told us," Shiratori muses, tapping his chin.

Shinichi remains silent, trying to structure his thoughts first.

"She most probably self-medicates," he finally says. "Her pupils were dilated and her speech was washed out."

"Yes, I noticed that, too. Her body tells a similar story, with how gaunt she is," Shiratori nods.

"Maybe she'd say more in the absence of that minder she has there," Fujimaki spits out.

"I doubt it," Shinichi says, "I think she told us everything she wanted to."

"Well," Shiratori sighs, "one representative we're talking to today is from Tou pharmaceutics. Maybe that will prove more illuminating."



***



After a prolonged stop for lunch and a coffee, Shinichi finds himself along with Shiratori and Fujimaki in the former's office. He is going over the information he gathered so far and sending it to an impatient Hattori, who already asked three times for the results of that first interrogation.

Shinichi rifles through his notes, pondering what to ask exactly of the witnesses they are to hear next. The Air fills his mind with serenity. The police building is fairly quiet, not as busy during the holidays as normally.

"Who is going to be here first?" Shinichi asks Fujimaki.

"The guy from Tou. Which is just as well. Might be our guy, that one, with the company tied to the family like that," Fujimaki says.

"Currently, neither of the two is to be treated like a suspect," Shiratori reminds Fujimaki, "we invited them as witnesses."

"Meaning they will appear without an attorney and we're not to press for confessions, yeah, yeah," Fujimaki growled.

Shinichi rolls his eyes at the other's impatience and goes back to rereading his notes on Yamada-san, which he later wants to share with Hattori.

The phone starts to ring about half an hour later, and Shiratori picks up, uttering a few orders to the person on the other end.

"They're here," he says after hanging up.

A few minutes later, a harried looking man in his late thirties is led into the room. He is stocky, his hair a little greasy and a bit too long, and he looks distinctly nervous. He is also a Neutral, Shinichi notes.

"Miyazaki-san, thank you for coming," Shiratori says, before Fujimaki begins by taking his personal information.

"So you had an appointment with Yamada-sensei at a quarter past five on the thirtieth of December, correct?"

"Yes, I did. But he wasn't there," Miyazaki-san replies.

"Is that so?" Shiratori asks, surprised.

"Yes! When I arrived and knocked on the door, it was locked and no one answered. I waited for about fifteen minutes before I left again," the sales representative answers, his hands twitching on his legs.

"Do you remember when you arrived, exactly?" Shinichi asks him.

"No, but it must have been very close to a quarter past five. Maybe a few minutes later. I took the same train that I always do, and that arrives at 17:12 at the stop directly in front of the center. Depending on the crowd, I can easily make it to his office in three minutes," the man replies.

"Did you meet him regularly then?" Shiratori wants to know.

"I did. He contractually received quite a few medications from the company and liked to be updated on new developments. I'd take samples to him, and sometimes I'd even deliver some of his orders directly. He was well connected, wasn't he? Son-in-law of the CEO, and so on," Miyazaki-san rambles.

"What did his orders consist of?" Shinichi asks.

"I don't know. I simply delivered the parcels."

"Was Yamada-sensei in contact with other people from the company?" Shiratori continues.

"I wouldn't know. Probably."

They don't gather anything else from him. He leaves shortly after, and Shinichi sighs, trying to straighten out his own nerves, which grew somewhat strained from the exposure to those of Miyazaki-san.

"He didn't know much. Was terrified, though," Fujimaki states.

"I think he realized that Yamada-sensei might have been dead already when he arrived at the center, or killed just around that time. He's probably scared to become a suspect," Shinichi says.

"Interesting, though, that he claims the door was locked. According to Nakamori-san and the other witnesses at the center, it wasn't."

Shinichi, being one of said witnesses, noticed that discrepancy, too.

"He might be lying. Or the culprit was still there when he came and had the door locked from the inside while they conducted their search for the medication," he suggests.

The second witness arrives twenty minutes after the first. Shinichi is surprised when a petite woman with western features enters the room. She is blonde, wearing her hair in a tight bun, and has stunning, gray eyes. She is well dressed and remarkably calm and collected. Shinichi instantly gets the mental image of a construction side in gray-scale, with workers sitting high up at a metal carrier, eating their lunch. He knows that photo, it's iconic, after all. She is a Guide, he gathers.

"Ms. Meyer," Shiratori greets her.

"Inspector Shiratori," she returns in fluent, hardly accented Japanese, and settles in her chair unruffled.

She is rather soft-spoken; there is an airy quality to her voice.

They go over the facts of the case quickly. She says she came to represent Parcey Pharma, an American company that has been on the rise in recent years. She has been working as their representative in Japan for over ten years now, beginning while she was still completing her studies.

"Did you come to Japan to go to university?" Shinichi asks her.

"No, my husband was a Japanese," she replies with a smile. "We got divorced a couple of years ago, though."

"Have you met with Yamada-sensei before the day of his murder?" Shiratori asks.

"Well, I didn't meet him then. When I arrived, he was already talking to somebody else, so I thought he mixed up his appointments, and left," she says. "I did meet him twice before, though, but only at bigger events with several different representatives from different companies."

"When did you get to the center?" Shiratori asks.

"At 16:35 about, I'd say. I ran a little late, missing the train I usually take," she answers.

"You said he was speaking to somebody else as you arrived. Could you tell us what the voice sounded like?" Shinichi interjects.

"It was a fairly deep voice, I think. I didn't catch what they spoke about, though. I had another appointment later on, and I decided to leave immediately to prepare for that instead. I intended to call him and reschedule, once I was done."

Shinichi nods.

"Did you notice anything else out of the ordinary?"

She shakes her head. Once the door is closed after her, Fujimaki groans.

"To summarize, we've got three witnesses that say they heard a male voice from that office during the time of murder, but with the scheduled appointment for the time being a woman and saying she didn't even see him, we're basically talking about an unknown suspect. It could have been anyone. The center is a public building!"

"I don't think it was, though. I think we're actually closer to the culprit than they'd like," Shinichi disagrees, "because all of this originates from inside the center, that much is for certain."

"How can you be so sure?" Fujimaki asks skeptically.

"The Kagami-case. No one apart from the people within the center had access to her. The culprit must be a doctor working on those cases. And it wasn't Yamada-sensei, we've got that confirmed."

"Be that as it may," Shiratori says, "we'll have to reconvene with the entire division on this. It's a high profile case. We've got four more cases of Sentinels that contacted hospitals, and six incidents of relatives and loved ones of Sentinels that died mysteriously recently contacting the police. The span of this is fairly large, so we'll have to work swiftly."

Shinichi nods and gets up. "I'll leave you to it, inspector. If I come up with something else, I'll be in touch."



***



The ride back home passes quickly. When he leaves the subway station behind, it's just around five in the evening, and the sun has already set. It's not completely dark yet, but the streetlights are already on, shining down on the remnants of snow, shoveled into piles by the side of the road. The sky is still cloudless, and the temperatures have dropped severely. Shinichi's breath is condensing in the cold air, the fog shimmering orange underneath the lampposts.

His thoughts are circling around the people he met today, the two women, one frail and deranged, one sharp and resolute, the man, frightened and nervous, the two doctors he met yesterday, who couldn't be more contrary. Only one out of all of them showed any indication that she knew about Yamada-sensei's style of treatment. Shinichi is certain, though, that she isn't going to help him any further. He felt it in her congealed soul.

His phone vibrates in his pocket, but he decides to take a look at it later, when he is not wearing gloves.

His mind is calm and settled now, ready to face Kaito once more, if he is still there. Shinichi half expects him to have fled the mansion, to have gone back to his own home, his own safe haven. He still has somebody waiting for him, despite what Nakamori-san's words might have suggested. Shinichi can't deliver a single argument in his favor, if the thief were to choose between them.

Still, when he returns, he finds the light in the library on and the house filled with the slightly scratchy sound of a record player running. Shinichi instantly recognizes the album. It's the one his mother liked to play for him when he struggled coming online. It consists of a collection of popular classical music that is overall calming and easy to listen to. Shinichi takes off his coat and shoes, placing them neatly on the rack, and walks into the large hall. It's like he is being steered remotely, his feet moving without his active consent. He stops when he reaches the door frame. Within the library, he spots KID, lounging on the sofa they occupied the evening before, a pensive expression on his face, even as his eyes move to take Shinichi in, and a smile spreads on his face.

"You're back early," he says.

"The questioning didn't take long. Neither of them were very forthcoming," Shinichi replies.

"Who would be, when the police knocks on your door?" Kaito replies, stretching and getting up to walk over to where Shinichi is still rooted by the entrance.

He has changed, Shinichi notices; he must have left in between. The clothes are his, not Shinichi's.

"Not you, certainly," Shinichi says drily, watching his approach.

Kaito smirks and places a soft kiss against Shinichi's cheek that leaves him flustered. "I'm politeness incarnate when it comes to law enforcement, am I not, Shinichi?"

"You're a nuisance, is what you are," Shinichi grumbles, crossing his arms on front of his chest to ward off the embarrassment threatening to overcome him.

KID laughs and reaches for his wrists, gently prying his arms apart again, and places Shinichi's hands on his hip.

"A nuisance that would kind of like you to say hi to him properly," he murmurs, closing in on Shinichi smiling like a Cheshire cat.

Shinichi should probably pull back and ask him where he is going with this. But he can't bring himself to, not when he actually doesn't want to know, at all, and instead would very much like to live in this moment for once. So he closes his eyes and kisses Kaito slowly and softly. It feels as incredible as before, making his heart speed up and his stomach flip in a good way. Shinichi can't say if that is because of the bond or the thief, but if he had to guess, he would probably say a mixture of both.

"How did you spend your day?" he mutters against his Sentinel's lips when they finally separate, opening his eyes to drown in the soulful, ocean-colored ones before him.

"Setting up your record player, of course. Went to get us food for dinner. Checked the donation status for the Haido Park's Temple bell," Kaito replies, weaving his arms around Shinichi's waist.

"Does it look good?" Shinichi asks.

"Excellent, I would say. They can buy that bell and restore the temple's aged truss along with it," Kaito smirks.

"Congratulations on a job well done," Shinichi smiles.

"It was a little too easy, with you not even trying to catch me," Kaito chuckles.

"I did catch you, though," Shinichi points out, pulling Kaito in by his belt loops, "didn't I?"

Kaito's face is open and soft. There is vulnerability in it, but there is also serenity, contentedness, and, above all, a tenderness that turns Shinichi's insides to goo.

"You did," he confirms. "So now you better take care of me."

"Are you sure?" Shinichi asks quietly.

"I am. I talked to Aoko, you know? She says she wants to meet you, when she can stand being in the same room with me again, that is. Knowing her, it's not going to take more than a week, though. She's always been way too good for me," Kaito confesses.

His smile looks a little bitter-sweet now. Shinichi wraps his arms around him more tightly, pulling him in so they are chest to chest, Kaito's cheek pressed against his. They really are just the same height.

"I'm so sorry," he says.

"Really, don't be, Shinichi. This was bound to happen one way or another. Even without this bond, we have a mountain of secrets between us, and even if I worked forever to carry it off, I don't think I could ever receive her full trust, just like I never gave her mine. I just didn't know it before I met you and saw what it was like to really do that, to be able to rely on someone."

Kaito's voice is raspy in his ear, and it raises goosebumps on his skin.

"I won't be around much. Especially not like this. Tomorrow, I'll be Conan again, and I'll continue to live like that for a while. And when I'm not anymore, I'm going to work on cases. With the police, with the FBI, wherever they'll take me. I don't plan on sticking around. Can you deal with that?"

"Can you handle me being away? You know it'll be the same for me. I've got something to see through to the end, too. And when I'm done, I'd like to see the world with my show. Travel a lot. Play many different places. Is that something you can live with?"

Shinichi shrugs. "It's pointless talking about it, isn't it? We can't look into the future, after all. But I think I'd like to try to be with you. And if I can't be with you, then I'd like to be someone you can return to. Or for you to be someone I can return to."

Kaito smiles warmly.

"That sounds about right to me," he whispers in Shinichi's ear and drags him into the library, just when the record player starts to play the Air that has become the sound of Shinichi's mind.

Shinichi is happily distracted from anything case related for the next two hours. He isn't quite sure he deserves this respite, isn't convinced he shouldn't be going through evidence instead, recapitulate what he heard today. But for once what his conscience tells him to do is defeated by what his heart, his body wants. Both of them are pretty sure that being cuddled up on the couch with Kaito and watching some old movie he has unearthed in the depths of the Kudou library beats looking at corpses for now.

It's only when he wants to check the time after the movie is over that he reaches for his phone and discovers a message from Matsuo Yuko. She is mainly apologizing for the tardiness, but the email also includes a list of information on the former members of her chair that have been involved in the fabrication and research of the compound. Shinichi skims over it, mostly familiar with the researchers already since he checked their author information. That's when his eyes catch the picture of Kaneko Risa, and he nearly drops the phone.

"What is it?" Kaito asks him.

"That woman was at the questioning today," Shinichi says, pointing at the picture. "Her hair was a little lighter, and her name is how Meyer, but other than that, I'm sure it's her."

"She didn't say she used to work with the group?" Kaito asks, and Shinichi shakes his head.

"She said she was married to a Japanese man, and that that was the reason she came here. Didn't mention her studies with one syllable," Shinichi replies.

"And conveniently forgot to mention that she went back to using her maiden name," Kaito adds, looking over Shinichi's shoulder.

"Say, there's no pictures of this Ota-san on any of his papers, is there?" he points out.

"No," Shinichi says, swiping through the material Matsuo sent him, "there isn't. We checked before, when we went through the publications."

"And this Murata is also missing," Kaito says.

"She sent us their full names, though," Shinichi says, going back to the first page.

"Murata Kana and Ota... Ota Hiroshi."

"Do you think...?" Kaito asks, sightly breathless.

"His resume didn't say anything about his scientific career, which is odd, but then again, if Matsuo is right, he didn't have the best reputation. We can find out, though. I've got a picture of Yamada-sensei's work ID," Shinichi says.

"Did you take it at his office?" Kaito asks.

"It was on his desk," Shinichi replies, typing in the phone number Matsuo gave him in her email as further contact information.

She picks up after the third ring. Shinichi explains the issue briefly and sends her the picture.

"That's him, yes. No doubt about it. I didn't know he got married, though," Matsuo confirms.

Shinichi thanks her and hangs up.

Kaito looks at him with huge eyes. "So you've got them? It's those two?"

"Well, Yamada-sensei we knew about. The problem is Kaneko-san, or rather Ms. Meyer. We can't truly tie her to the case, even though we know now that she lied to us about not knowing Yamada-sensei. She claims that she didn't see him that day, because he was already meeting somebody else, and that has been confirmed by both, Ito-sensei and Nakano-sensei. They both claim that a man has been with him during that time."

"Ito-sensei heard someone speak in Yamada-sensei's office? Isn't hers at the other end of the corridor? Those doors are heavy. Unless you're a Sentinel, you can't really hear someone speaking behind them, much less from so far away," Kaito says.

"You're right. Even Nakano-sensei only said she heard someone when she was passing directly by his door on her way to the dentist," Shinichi remembers.

"So how could Ito-sensei know?"

"Either she talked to Nakano-sensei about it and aligned her story to that of her colleague, or they're both lying and are in this together. But I don't think it's the latter. Shiratori told me today that they checked with her dentist, and he confirmed that Nakano-sensei had an appointment there at the time she mentioned," Shinichi says. "He also said they could confirm Ito-sensei's schedule. If she were the murderer, she'd have had less than five minutes to commit the deed. Which brings Meyer into this again, who has had the time, but is protected by those two statements that confirm there having been someone else at the office."

Shinichi's mind is firing. They have slipped into Kaito's music, he notices. It's a Flamenco soundtrack, one Shinichi thinks he has heard before, but he can't remember where.

"I'm missing something," he says.

Kaito holds up a hand. "Let's summarize. That woman is almost certainly one of the two people notorious for pushing that drug within that research group. She is linked to both, a pharma company and the center via Yamada. She's only protected by the statements of two witnesses who have heard a man talking to the victim while she was there, one of whom has to be lying. No one has seen said man, or her."

"Yeah. That's about it," Shinichi agrees.

"Well, then you should tell the police that they need to talk to the three of them again," Kaito says.

"Indeed," Shinichi sighs, "and this time, at least one of them should bring a lawyer."

Chapter 19: Accelerando

Notes:

Hi!
This time, I have a content warning for you guys. So, this work has been tagged as mature, and the reason for that aren't so much the crimes as what's going to happen in this chapter. Usually, I'm not a friend of spoilers, but in this case, I feel like I'm obligated to warn you:
If you don't want to read mature content, but are okay with a slightly more intense making-out scene, stop reading this chapter when things are taken upstairs.
If you don't like those either, start scrolling a bit faster when things begin to... well... begin, until a phone rings.
I hope that helps you avoid things you don't want to read:)
As always, I want to thank everyone for their support and encouragement. Have a wonderful weekend!

Chapter Text

Despite of all his claims about detectives being unimpressive and boring, Kaito can't help but listen closely while Shinichi finishes his calls to the police. The self-assurance and insistence with which he handles the situation are mesmerizing, and Kaito can't distract himself from it. He observes Shinichi circling the room, talking to the officers on the other end of the line with sedate assertiveness. It takes about half an hour before Shinichi is done and hangs up.

"You know, it's a little disconcerting having you stare at me like that," he says, walking back to where Kaito is still stretched out on the couch.

He is being honest. Kaito can tell by the gentle color rising in his cheeks and the way he won't quite meet his eyes. He puts his phone down on the table next to the sofa and takes off his suit jacket, hanging it over the backrest.

"You don't need to feel so insecure, Shinichi. I was only thinking how sexy you sound while giving orders to Division One," Kaito grins.

It has the desired effect of increasing his blush.

"Stop teasing me," the detective grumbles.

"I wouldn't dream of teasing you," Kaito lies and takes Shinichi's hand to pull him next to himself.

The detective follows without resistance, so he can't be too irritated. Kaito puts his head on Shinichi's shoulder, pressing against his side.

The turntable is still filling the room with its scratchy sound. It incorporates itself effortlessly into their shields, replacing the music that is stuck in their minds. Kaito turns Shinichi's hand, watches the slender, bony fingers, and holds them against his own. His are a little longer, but not by much.

"I'm going to miss you being grown up. Don't get me wrong, Conan-kun is adorable, and you're still you, but it's nice to have someone big too hold onto," he tells Shinichi.

"Mmh," Shinichi hums, lacing his fingers with Kaito's, "then you better make the most of the next twelve hours."

"Haibara-san said you might be able to get back to normal in about a month."

Shinichi shrugs, careful not to dislodge Kaito. "I'd choose a more conservative estimate, but I guess that by the beginning of March, I could be myself again."

"So two more months," Kaito says.

"Yes, more or less," Shinichi affirms.

Kaito nods against his shoulder, enjoying his warmth and the faint smell of mint and bergamot of his shampoo.

"Are there things you're looking forward to doing again?"

Shinichi chuckles. "Buying a cup of coffee at any store I want to, reaching the cabinets without a chair, telling Ran I'm back and spending an afternoon with her as myself, I guess. And maybe do this again."

"Do what?" Kaito asks, staring up at Shinichi.

"Just hang out with you, tinkering with old tech, talking about books, watching movies. It has been nice," Shinichi replies, running his thump over the back of Kaito's hand.

"It has," Kaito purrs, squeezing Shinichi's hand in return.

The bond is almost singing with energy, alive and striving. Shinichi's emotions, tense and worried about the case, slowly lighten up, easily shifting into the deep contentment Kaito feels at their closeness. The sounds of the house, the cracking of timber and the rush of the hot water through the pipes of the heating system, are low in the background, nothing but the backdrop to the music and Shinichi's heartbeat and breath. Shinichi's eyes are very blue. Kaito might drown in them.

Shinichi adjusts their shields with a soft smile playing around the corners of his mouth.

"You're so distracted," he says, voice like molten caramel, sweet and rich.

"You're being very distracting," Kaito counters and leans in to kiss him.

Shinichi doesn't resist this time, either. They kiss again and again for a couple of minutes, Kaito moving closer and closer, wrapping his arms around the detective and pulling him in further. They end up spread out on the sofa, like before, Shinichi's cheeks flushed and hair hopelessly mussed, but eyes alight with want as he looks down at Kaito. It sparks something within Kaito's own body that is foreign and faintly scary.

It's powerful though, making Kaito incapable of looking away.

"Have you thought this through?" Shinichi breathes down at him.

"No, I haven't," Kaito replies airily.

"Wouldn't it be better to-" Shinichi starts, but Kaito doesn't have the patience for that and pulls him back down on top of himself, searching his mouth once more.

"This is better," he whispers against Shinichi's lips.

"Of course it is, but shouldn't we take this a little more slowly?" Shinichi suggests almost pleadingly, propped up on his left forearm, framing Kaito's head.

The impression is ruined, however, by his eager right hand mapping out Kaito's torso with feathery touches. Kaito opens his mouth, and a breathless gasp escapes as Shinichi skims his sensitive side.

"If you really want that, you have to stop now!" he hisses, eyes shutting in bliss as Shinichi's hand worms its way underneath his shirt and strokes down his stomach.

The sensation is intense, especially with the bond still open. It feels like Shinichi leaves a trail of burning embers in his wake.

"Hmmm," Shinichi hums, his hand moving up towards Kaito's chest.

Kaito's own hands decide they have been out of the game for long enough and tackle Shinichi's button-down shirt. They make short work of it, even with most of Kaito's focus on the way Shinichi's lips are caressing his own and his hand tracing his collarbone, still underneath his sweater. He pushes Shinichi's shirt over his shoulders. Shinichi retreats a bit, searching Kaito's eyes. Whatever he finds is enough for him to hold himself up and shrug out of the garment, leaving Kaito's hands freedom to roam across his bare upper body.

It's marvelous, Kaito thinks. Shinichi is slim, not overly muscled, but still firm, and so incredibly warm under his fingertips. Kaito can see goosebumps rising where his fingers go, can watch his ribcage expand and deflate with deep, rough breaths that hiss through his slightly opened lips. When he manages to tear his eyes from the path his hands are taking and look up again, Shinichi's eyelids are lowered. He is staring at Kaito with an intensity that makes his heart skip a beat.

His right hand reaches for the hem of Kaito's own shirt and pushes it up wordlessly. His emotions flood Kaito with an overpowering need to be skin to skin. He pulls off his shirt faster than the other can blink. A surprised chuckle escapes from Shinichi.

"Right, I should have known that you've got routine in getting out of your clothes quickly," he says huskily.

"This sounds as if you're shaming me for something, detective," Kaito complains, voice breathy.

Shinichi just shakes his head in mild exasperation. Kaito would have continued the argument, if the detective didn't choose that moment to lower himself down so that their bodies are finally flush, one of Shinichi's legs between Kaito's own, their chests smooth and solid against the other, Shinichi's forearms now bracketing Kaito's head from both sides. Shinichi's lips find his again. Kaito couldn't say how his hands end up on the other's back, one tracing his vertebrae from the neck on downwards, the other clinging to his shoulder.

It's a lot to take in, Kaito's perception going into overdrive, and since both of their emotions are bubbling up to the point of boiling over, neither of them is capable of exerting even a sliver of control. Kaito thinks he might be panting, gasping quietly into Shinichi's mouth while his wandering hand has reached the waistband of the detective's suit trousers, and his audacious fingers start skimming underneath it, approaching a terrain that is far from what Kaito knows and is used to. Shinichi's breath hitches, his movements stilling for but a moment, before he carefully presses his hips down against Kaito's. That punches a moan right out of Kaito's stomach, and there is nothing he can do to keep it in. Their lips separate, and they stare at each other in genuine surprise, both of them caught off guard by how fast this is escalating.

"I-" Shinichi says, but before he can complete the sentence, his phone rings.

They both freeze in shock. Shinichi gives Kaito an apologetic look and sits up, reaching out for it. When Kaito catches a glimpse of the caller ID, he wants to throw something against the wall.

"Oh, this is so typical, I should have known it would be him!" he groans in what he has to admit is fairly frustrated desire.

"I'm sorry," Shinichi whispers and presses a quick kiss to Kaito's mouth, "we'll continue this in a minute."

He means it, and Kaito finds himself mollified as Shinichi pulls the blanket over their disheveled bodies and picks up.

"Hakuba-san, what a surprise that you should call me," Shinichi says.

Kaito can't help but fake a bout of retching next to him.

"Ah, Kudou-san, I'm very sorry for the late call. I hope I'm not interrupting your evening," Kaito hears Hakuba reply on the other end.

He scowls darkly.

"It's alright," Shinichi says politely, and Kaito would pinch him for it, could he not feel through their bond that to Shinichi, too, it really isn't. "What is this about?"

"You see, Hattori-san told me to reach out to you if I found something relevant while going through the data of the medical personnel at the Haido Sentinel-Guide-Center, since he is with his newly bonded girlfriend over the holidays and, uh, wished to avoid complications."

'So now we have to deal with those complications? We're with our fairly newly bonded one, as well!' Kaito mouths at Shinichi, enraged.

Shinichi tangles his hand in Kaito's messy hair and starts to rub his scalp, placating him. Kaito is loath to admit that it works.

"I see. You did background checks on the physicians, then?" Shinichi asks.

"I did. It was quite a list Hattori-san handed me a day before Christmas, so it took me a while," Hakuba replies, and Kaito can just imagine him, sitting all arrogant and almighty in his plush armchair.

This is building up to a long-winded explanation.

"There are several doctors whose background is a little dubious, which is such a stain on an organization such as the SGO, but for our case, I think there are two people that are especially relevant, disregarding, of course, Yamada-sensei, the victim of the recent murder. One has a history working with the chemical compound that was identified in the drug, being one of the leading researchers in that field. However, I can't establish a connection to a possible supplier for this one, and also, as far as I can tell, there are no activities that would incriminate that person."

Kaito wonders why he bothers talking about the physician in question, then.

"The other one, however," Hakuba continues while Shinichi listens with the patience of an angel, "has strong ties with the pharma lobby and a history of working with Sene at the start of their career. They are known to have been one of the doctors who distributed it liberally, even after it had long been criticized for its devastating effects on Sentinels. They have been vocal in their support to reestablish a treatment focused on medication for years, up until that opinion became too disputed to uphold further."

"Has this person continued treating patients with medication backhandedly?" Shinichi asks.

"The orders placed at the respective companies indicate that, yes. Most problematic mixture of medication, I have to say. I'm not certain if I've got all of the orders from all the companies together, though, seeing as their current partner already is a sales representative at one of the bigger ones."

Shinichi gasps. Kaito can practically watch as the puzzle pieces align in his head.

"Hakuba-san, this person you're talking about and their partner, they wouldn't happen to be..."

"Ito Tomoe and Lisa Meyer, who formerly went by Kaneko Risa, a research associate with Toudai. They form a Guide-Guide couple, which is rare, but not unheard of. I assume, the police overlooked it due to that fact."

Kaito and Shinichi stare at each other, baffled, the solution right in front of their eyes. The only thing that is missing is proof.

"Can I ask you for a favor, Hakuba-san? I need you to forward this information to Division One and order immediate searches of Parcey Pharma's Tokyo branch, as well as an apartment in Haido. I'll send you the address," Shinichi requests.

"Certainly, but don't you want to see this through yourself, Kudou-san?" Hakuba asks, surprised, mirroring Kaito's own sentiments.

"I'm a little indisposed tonight," Shinichi replies with a soft smile on his lips that melts Kaito's heart.

His eyes trace over Kaito's face, and suddenly, they widen a little.

"Another thing," he adds, "please try to get a hold of a sample of Lisa Meyer's voice when she thinks no one is listening and play it to Nakano-sensei from the center."

Hakuba agrees to the strange instruction and says goodbye. Shinichi puts the phone back on the desk after forwarding the address of Ito-sensei, unfortunately removing his other hand from Kaito's hair in the process.

"I don't see how I didn't think of it any sooner," he murmurs.

"Thought of what?" Kaito asks.

"Her voice, when she spoke to us. Meyer, I mean. It was strangely breathy and soft, even though her whole appearance was so self-assured and resolute. It didn't fit."

"She pitched it up," Kaito realizes.

"I would bet my watch that when we get our hands on a sample of her real voice and play it to Nakano-sensei, she will identify it as that of the man she heard in Yamada-sensei's office," Shinichi says.

"Ito-sensei learned from Nakano-sensei that she thought she heard a man in Yamada-sensei's office and decided to match their stories, in order to create an alibi for her partner that she could later use in order to claim she never saw Yamada-sensei that day," Kaito concludes.

"It was an honest mistake of Nakano-sensei that the two of them spun to their advantage," Shinichi says.

"How did you think of it?" Kaito asks.

A deep crimson spreads across Shinichi's face, beating everything Kaito has seen on him so far by a margin.

"What is that, Shinichi? Have you thought of something naughty?" he smirks, leaning closer to the other, intrigued.

"No!" Shinichi exclaims, "I didn't!"

"Are you sure, though? You look like you're ready to explode," Kaito teases.

"It wasn't! It's just... Well, maybe...", Shinichi trails off, burying his face in his hands.

"Shinichi... Tell me," Kaito sings.

There is a beat of silence.

Then Shinichi mumbles, "Your voice just now. When you moaned. It sounded like that."

It's a testament to both, Shinichi's courage and his trust that he peaks at Kaito through his fingers after saying something like that. It's also a serious blow to Kaito's image as the slick and composed one of the two of them, because that answer has his own face flaring up like a fire hydrant.

Shinichi lowers his hands slowly and reaches for Kaito's, that are motionless on his lap. The movement has unsettled the blanket on Shinichi, exposing his still naked torso to the chilly air of the library. His minuscule trembling, however, doesn't seem related to the temperature.

"It was a nice sound," he whispers, looking at Kaito with earnest, searching eyes.

Kaito struggles for air, fighting to get over his embarrassment.

"Don't just spring things like that on me," he bursts out eventually.

"You asked!" Shinichi retorts heatedly.

Kaito isn't interested in that conversation. He is more interested in tackling Shinichi flat on his back and kissing him until he is too out of breath to say things Kaito can't handle.

They are quickly back at the point where they left off, positions now reversed and hands wandering just as daringly. It's slowly bordering on too much for their state of dress.

"Let's take this upstairs," Shinichi mutters into Kaito's ears, his teeth worrying Kaito's earlobe.

They don't waste any time on the way, Shinichi taking Kaito's hand and pulling him along, up the stairs, through the corridor, into a room that smells of dust and leather and books, kind of like the library, but underneath it all there is a hint of bergamot and mint. It makes Kaito feel safe.

The bed is freshly made, even though they didn't sleep in it yesterday, and Kaito wonders who did that for a moment, but he is quickly distracted by Shinichi's hands on his jeans, touching the button hesitantly, asking for permission. Kaito just answers by going for Shinichi's belt. They slip under the covers just moments later, down to nothing but their underwear; that last barrier something they couldn't get rid off so out in the open.

Kaito's heart is racing and Shinichi's is echoing it beat for beat. They push and pull on and against the other, their bodies striving to get closer, tongues meshing, hands searching. Kaito reels Shinichi in by the hips when the detective has settled on top of him again and starts to grind up against him with abandon. Their combined want is too much to ward off, and no phone call in the world could stop this anymore. Shinichi groans above him and aligns his own movement with Kaito's, adding to the pressure building between them.

"Kaito, we-" he gasps, pulling at Kaito's pants.

By now, Kaito is too far gone to care about anything like embarrassment, especially underneath the protective cover of the blanket that traps their warmth within. Kaito pushes off his boxers, and Shinichi follows suit by shimmying out of his own. Kaito ends up using his feet to get them out of the way without the other having to move.

Kaito can hardly control his breathing at this point. When Shinichi presses down, another airy, high-pitched moan escapes him against his will. Shinichi shudders, and Kaito is stunned by the clarity with which he can tell how much Shinichi likes it.

Emboldened, he reaches down between them, wrapping his hand around the both of them and starts to move. Shinichi's hand comes to join his, falling into step effortlessly. Just like in every other aspect of their relationship, the two of them are in perfect synchronicity. It's way too overwhelming to last long, and Kaito can't say who tips over the edge first. He regains his senses slowly, Shinichi lying half on top of, half next to him, breath slowing down gradually.

"I think straight is off the table for good," Kaito chuckles.

"Hmm, probably," Shinichi hums.

His voice sounds low, rough, and content.

"Can't say I mind so much," Kaito muses.

Shinichi pushes himself up and presses a kiss to the corner of Kaito's mouth.

"Me neither. Though I could do with a shower."

"How unromantic. Are you just going to jump right up?" Kaito teases him.

"You are much more bothered by this stickiness than I am," Shinichi replies drily, and Kaito can't deny that, his sensitive skin already protesting. "And besides, what's romantic about lying in your own mess?"

"You are such a mood killer, Shinichi," Kaito complains, but he still lets the other pull him out of bed and into the bathroom next to the detective's room, enjoying the view of an undressed Shinichi in front of him.

Both of them being as exhausted as they are speeds up the cleaning process considerably. They are back in bed swiftly, Kaito wrapping himself around Shinichi from behind and pulling him close.

"This is simply too warm," Shinichi complains.

"Just deal with it for now," Kaito tells him.

Shinichi falls silent and pushes back against Kaito nearly imperceptibly.

"I really like you, you know?" Kaito whispers to him after a while.

"I do. Know, that is," Shinichi replies drowsily, a smile in his voice. "I like you, too, Kaito."

"I know," Kaito replies, tightening his hold on the other.

They actually manage to fall asleep like that, enclosed in warmth, security, and a feeling of belonging.

Chapter 20: Decrescendo

Notes:

Hi everyone,
what the hell happened to the last four months? How are they already over and we find ourselves at the end of July? How am I already posting the last chapters? Or, maybe, I could even say the last chapter, since the next one is going to be more of an epilogue? I have no idea. All I know, is that I'm so, so grateful for having been able to share this story with you. Thank you for being here and giving it a chance, thank you for your kudos, thank you for your comments. I'll be gushing about how wonderful I think you are even more next week, so I hope you've got a good time until then :)

Chapter Text

Without either of them setting up an alarm, Kaito and Shinichi rise at seven. The sun is just beginning to climb over the horizon in the east. The first signs of the looming transformation have begun to show themselves in the trembling of Shinichi's hands. They get up and dress in silence, even though Shinichi thinks it's pointless, with him going to have to change again in an hour. The music in his mind is heavy and slow.

Kaito reaches for his hand and pulls him through the house, heading to the upper level of the library that is accessible from this floor. He drags him to a window that faces the rising sun and settles on the window sill, the leg by the glass pulled close to himself, the other dangling over the ledge. He looks at Shinichi with a silent request written in his eyes, and Shinichi sits down in the space between his thighs, his back to Kaito's chest. Kaito wraps his arms around him, and Shinichi pulls his legs up, watching the sunrise with the other wordlessly, as the first flashes of pain lance through his system.

It is as if they have to say goodbye, even if Shinichi is going nowhere. Neither of them is interested in verbalizing it. There is no need, not with the bond at the core of both of them letting them know that the feeling is shared. Kaito radiates reluctance and unwillingness to let go of Shinichi, and Shinichi just leans into him a little more, relishing the soothing sensation of Kaito's warm lips mouthing at his nape.

The sky brightens steadily, promising another chilling, cloudless day.

"Two months?" Kaito whispers, squeezing Shinichi tightly when he begins to sweat and pant slightly, his bones slowly liquefying in his body.

"Two months," Shinichi whispers back.

Then it starts. It's as excruciating as always, his body convulsing in Kaito's arms, his voice barely contained behind his clenched teeth, breath coming rapidly as his own skin sets out to strangle him, and his organs collapse in on themselves. A single gasp leaves his mouth, and he shuts his eyes tightly, waiting for it to finally be over. After about a minute, it is. He sits in his too large clothes, back still pressed against Kaito's chest, his head now leaning against his clavicle, exhausted and drenched in sweat.

"I need another shower," he croaks hoarsely.

"Yes," Kaito murmurs.

Shinichi looks up at him. His eyes look suspiciously moist.

"Hey, it's alright, it doesn't hurt once it's over," he says gently.

"I could see how they intended to kill you with this," Kaito breathes into the crown of Shinichi's hair, so quietly Shinichi barely catches it.

"Yes," he replies, "they did. But they didn't manage. And now they're gone."

Kaito moves away and meets his eyes again. Shinichi can see the steel within those ocean-colored irises.

"And you're still here," he says.

Shinichi nods and smiles. Kaito leans down and presses a soft, chaste kiss to Shinichi's lips.

"I'm going to hang around then and make sure that it stays this way," he murmurs velvety soft.

"Only after I took a shower," Shinichi insists.

"As you wish, baby," Kaito replies and proceeds to get up, effortlessly hoisting Shinichi onto his hip.

"Stop that, you stupid thief! And shove your pet names back where they came from!" Shinichi seethes, struggling against the other's iron grip.

"Now, now, Meitantei, we wouldn't want you to trip and fall in your weakened state, would we?" Kaito tuts at him. "And why do you take such an issue with endearments? You didn't take any with me showing my affection in a physical way, so why does it bother you when I do it verbally?"

"It's just creepy, okay?! And I can walk on my own, so let me down!" Shinichi retorts, pushing against Kaito's shoulder.

"No can do, doll," Kaito sings, and Shinichi gives up with a groan.



***



They are just sitting at the breakfast table together, Shinichi enjoying the commodity of nobody being around to keep him from drinking coffee, when his phone rings. It's Hattori. Shinichi puts the device down between them and activates the speaker. Kaito is going to listen in, anyway, so he might as well keep his hands free and continue eating.

"Kudou, did you hear?" Hattori bursts out, as soon as the call connects.

"Hear what?" Shinichi asks, already having an idea what he is about to learn.

"They got them! Found the lab that produced the pills and apprehended the heads of the network that distributed them. Hakuba and Division One made a raid last night and arrested Ito and that woman, Meyer, that you interviewed yesterday. They were about to leave the country apparently," Hattori explains breathlessly.

"Ah, the first part I did know already. I asked him to, when he called me, after all," Shinichi hums.

"You did? He did? Why?!" Hattori asks incredulously.

"You asked him to," Shinichi replies guilelessly, taking a sip from his coffee.

Kaito smirks at him from across the table, amused by the little game Shinichi plays with the hot-headed Osakan detective. Hattori, however, is decidedly not entertained.

"Would you mind telling me what happened, Kudou?" he growls, and Shinichi relents, talking him through yesterday's revelations.

"So it was her, after all," Hattori concludes, once Shinichi is done.

"It was her," Shinichi confirms. "I just can't say whether they will be able to charge her with the murder."

KID sends him a worried glance, setting down his chopsticks.

"Oh, they will. They found the patient's data with her, you see? As obsessed with her medication as she was, she didn't get rid of it, hoping to use Yamada-sensei's notes for her research. Since Ito-sensei had an appointment during the time and can't have entered the office, and because the corpse was found so soon after the crime, the only way she could've gotten her hands on it is if she was indeed in that room after he died," Hattori says.

"The higher you climb, the harder you fall," Shinichi sighs. "Was she that convinced, even with the results they achieved?"

"Meyer stated that they've tried the drug on over four hundred Sentinels, twenty of whom have died and around eighty of whom are treated at the hospital as we speak. She was convinced that the effectiveness of her medication was proven and they only needed to stabilize the agent somewhat to make it more secure. Yamada-sensei was just as certain as she was, only he intended to truly help people, while she was in it for the money," Hattori explains.

"And why did she kill him?" Shinichi asks.

"Because he became too careless with the distribution," Hattori replies. "She was worried, and rightly so, that the police would eventually trace it back to him. Since she had another in at the center with her partner, who was covertly distributing the drug, though only among the cases where a heart attack wouldn't raise any red flags, and never when she was directly involved in the treatment, Meyer considered Yamada-sensei to be expendable."

"Ruthless," Shinichi comments.

"Very much," Hattori agrees.

"So that's it, then, case closed?" Shinichi asks.

"Only if you tell me whom I'm hearing eating with you in the background and why exactly you had to appear as your adult self at those hearings. Don't think for a minute I didn't catch on to that fact, Kudou," Hattori says slyly.

Kaito and Shinichi look at each other for a moment. It's Kaito, who answers.

"That would be my fault, Hattori-san."

"I know that voice," Hattori says.

"We met at the library," Kaito replies helpfully.

Hattori gasps. "Kuroba? The guy Hakuba thinks is KID? The friend of Nakamori Aoko, who was registered among the cases?"

"So he did share his suspicions with you, after all," Kaito laughs.

"Wouldn't shut up about it, actually. So you were at the center with him when they found Yamada-sensei, Kudou? What the hell are you two doing together?" Hattori asks, astonished.

Kaito smirks. "Well, we got in a bit of a predicament when we accidentally bonded, you see?"

"Wait, what?!"

The audio of Shinichi's phone is clipping at Hattori's exclamation.

"It's as he says, we are... Compatible, I guess you could say, and we got bonded by accident," Shinichi confirms, not bothering to mention when exactly that happened.

"I thought he was a Neutral!"

"I made sure to leave Hakuba with that impression. Wouldn't do for him to find more things in common between me and KID for his baseless accusations," Kaito replies sweetly, and Shinichi raises an eyebrow at him. "Besides, I had to keep my shields up around him, with how aggressive he is with his own."

"I can't argue with that," Hattori grumbles. "But are you kidding me? You're bonded? You don't even know each other that well, do you? Are you going to sever it?"

Their eyes meet. Shinichi smiles.

"No, I don't think we could right now, even if we tried. The bond is exceptionally strong. Besides, I'm quite happy with Kaito. I think we'll get along swimmingly."

"I can only agree with you, love," Kaito lilts, and Shinichi blushes again, despite trying his hardest not to.

"Would you stop it with those pet names? For the last time!"

"Sounds like you're rather familiar with each other already," Hattori comments drily.

Shinichi blushes even more, while Kaito cackles and purrs, "Oh, intimately so, Hattori-san."

"Stop it!" Shinichi groans.

"I concur, I don't need to hear this," Hattori mutters.

He sounds as uncomfortable as Shinichi feels.

"Well, if you're alright and lovey-dovey over there, you will excuse me, because I've got to get back to my perfectly normal, not at all accidentally acquired Guide," he adds.

"Take care, Hattori," Shinichi says and hangs up, before Kaito can embarrass him further.

"That was fun," the blasted thief sighs, looking for all intents and purposes like the cat that got the canary.

"It was not. You're a menace," Shinichi snaps.

"Yes. But you said you'd like to keep me, anyway," Kaito sings happily.

Shinichi huffs and laughs. "So help me luck, I really do."



***



Kaito doesn't stay all the day. He leaves around noon, wanting to check in on Nakamori-san again, despite the fact that he is almost certain they are simply going to argue. They decide to meet again on Saturday, because Shinichi has to return to the agency and be with the Mouri family for a bit, too, and Kaito has to meet his mother, who spontaneously decided to spend some time over the holidays in Japan. She is going to arrive tomorrow afternoon. The goodbye kiss he gave Shinichi still lingers on his lips after Kaito is gone and makes him feel giddy and winded.

Shinichi heads over to the professor's after while, once he is sure he is a bit more collected. Haibara invited the kids over at around two, which is another hour off. She opens the door for him, visibly more composed than yesterday and back to her silky, smooth barriers. She takes one look at him, listens to the upbeat Irish folk song in his mind, and smirks.

"So you and that thief of yours are an item now, aren't you?"

"He's not my thief. I don't keep criminals," Shinichi disagrees.

"You do keep me around, too," she reminds him.

"You've more than redeemed yourself."

She smiles and lets him enter. "Only thanks to you."

They sit with the professor for a bit, who excitedly tells them about the progress with his Christmas decorations.

"I couldn't believe it! One morning, I woke up and suddenly the tinsel just worked! Here, look," he says, showing Shinichi a strand of it that quickly varies between very aggressive shades of red, green, blue, orange, yellow, and pink.

Shinichi's brow is twitching on his face. He has a suspicion that this particular piece of tinsel isn't the professor's creation, at all.

"Just like magic, isn't that so, Shinichi?" Haibara comments, grinning sardonically.

Shinichi just laughs uncomfortably.

The kids turn up on time and fill the house with a cheery, good mood. They tackle the cake Haibara got for them with enthusiasm, talking incessantly about their holidays and what they did during them.

"My parents even took me to the KID heist on New Year's Eve!" Genta tells them proudly. "There was this really suspicious guy, you know? Looked just like KID when he disguised himself as Conan-kun's cousin! Wore a hat and a scarf so you couldn't see his face well, but I totally recognized him!"

Shinichi has a bad feeling about where this is heading.

"What did you do?" Ayumi asks excitedly.

"I watched him the whole time, but then the bell chimed, and I got distracted," Genta admits, looking crestfallen. "Then KID appeared and there was all of that weird decoration, and when I checked again, the guy was gone!"

"That must've been him!" Mitsuhiko cries, and Ayumi nods eagerly.

Shinichi has to focus very hard on keeping a straight face.

"Do you think your cousin could be KID, Conan-kun?" Ayumi asks him.

"No, he really can't. He was once at a heist where he shot at him from a helicopter, so that can't be," Shinichi explains, while Haibara behind him positively glows with mirth, her mind a bright yellow once more, the silky strands shining like the sun.

"Aww, such a shame," Ayumi sighs.

They go on to play one of the professor's new board game inventions, which turns out to be both, fairly entertaining and fairly complicated. It keeps then occupied for the better part of two hours, before Mitsuhiko addresses Haibara.

"Ai-chan, you said you had something important to tell us."

Shinichi and her exchange a glance. Shinichi lets his music wrap around her mind for a second, a wordless reassurance.

"Yes. I'm sorry, you guys, but I'm going to leave after today. There is somewhere else I need to go, and that means I can't be with you any longer," she says calmly.

"What?" Ayumi asks, eyes large and beginning to swim with tears.

Shinichi swallows. It's going to be difficult to say goodbye to them for him, too, but he knows the time is going to come.

"I won't be able to contact you for a while. But eventually, I'll be back in one way or another, and then I'll tell you why I had to go," Haibara adds quietly, handing Ayumi a handkerchief.

"Is Conan-kun going to leave, too?" Genta asks, subdued and worried.

Shinichi contemplates lying for a moment, but decides against it. This is a truth the kids will be faced with soon, so they might as well learn about it together.

"Eventually. By February or March," he says, "but I won't be out of reach, and Haibara will be for only a short time. We're not going to disappear on you guys," he says.

Mitsuhiko, who has been staring at them silently, is the one who turns to look at Shinichi earnestly and says, "It's a promise, then? In March, you'll be back with us and tell us what the big secret is all about?"

"It's a promise," Shinichi confirms, and Haibara nods.

The three of them exchange a look.

"Alright," they agree, reaching for Haibara and Shinichi with outstretched pinkies.

The two of them exchange a look and a relieved smile of their own. They link their pinkies with those of the kids and shake on it.



***



Shinichi makes his way back to the agency at around six. It's dark already, and the streets are much less frequented than usually. He walks along a particularly deserted road, remembering that first resonance a month ago that made him stop in the middle of the sidewalk. Now, there is the bond at the core of his mind; the music that runs through him, still that exuberant Irish folk song, fills not just himself. It's a strange thought.

His fingers brush against his phone in his pocket, and he takes it out on a hunch. He has a message from Hakuba, informing him basically of what Hattori told him earlier. Shinichi thanks him for his effort and is about to put his phone back, when he remembers one last question.

'That other person you were talking about yesterday, that worked with the compound, who were they, by the way?' he types into the messenger app.

'Another former member of the Toudai group. Added an additional qualification as a psychiatrist to their resume and began working as such with extreme cases. Did a study mainly based on stimuli, not working with any medication besides what you would give from a psychiatric point of view. Actually has been a lot of help in identifying the cases since it became public and has also pushed for involving the police in this. Her name is Hashimoto Aki, but her maiden name was Murata.'

Shinichi stares at his screen for a moment, suddenly recalling kind, amber eyes and a patient psychiatrist explaining him her new treatment methods in a sterile room with a dead Kagami-san in front of him. She's the psychiatrist from the very first case he and Hattori were called to, he realizes.

'It's the odd coincidences that make a case the most interesting,' he texts back at Hakuba and stows his phone away.

Ran is in a good mood when he enters the flat above the office. She just finished setting the table while Mouri is watching TV. Okino Yoko is singing in a New Year's special, leaving the man for once absolutely balanced and content.

"Conan-kun, what a great timing," Ran greets him. Her mind is a river sparkling in the sun. "Did you have a nice time with the professor?"

"Yes, Ran-neesan," Shinichi smiles at her, "How about you?"

"Oh, it was wonderful," Ran replies and tells him how she and Sonoko celebrated the turn of the year.

They met with the four of them, the girls bringing their boyfriends along, and apparently, Makoto-san had his hands full keeping up with Sonoko's whims.

"When she heard that KID was going to show up at Haido Park, we even had to go there, but we arrived after midnight and he was already gone, unfortunately," Ran says, and Shinichi can't help but be grateful for having dodged that bullet.

After dinner is over, Ran and Shinichi put the dishes into the dishwasher and return to the table. Shinichi can feel a certain tension radiating from her. He shoots her a questioning glance. She clears her throat.

"Dad, Conan-kun, I've got an announcement to make."



***



The next morning finds Shinichi up bright and early and vibrating with nerves. He tried to force himself into the steady rhythm of his Air, but it turned out to be difficult to keep, so he relented a while ago and leaned into the bond. A familiar sound is filling his mind now, the very definition of the Son Cubano. Chan Chan is playing in Kaito's head today. Shinichi doesn't understand a word of Spanish. He wonders if Kaito does.

Shaking himself from his reverie, he rings the doorbell in front of him. A moment later, he hears the quick pattern of steps coming downstairs.

"It felt like you were here. What's wrong?" Kaito frowns down at him when he opens the door.

Shinichi listens to the chorus of his song.

"Say, what exactly is the person saying in that song?"

"Right now?" Kaito replies, scrutinizing Shinichi closely, before translating,

"'From Alto Cedro I go to Marcané

I get to Cueto, then head for Mayarí'.

I understood it as a metaphor. Maybe it means that, no matter where you are at, there's another destination you can head to that will get you closer to where you want to be. Or it could mean nothing at all. I don't know."

Shinichi smiles. "No, I like the idea. That's a nice interpretation.”

"Shinichi, why is there a large suitcase standing behind you?"

Shinichi can hear the trepidation in Kaito's voice.

"Ran is moving in with Araide-sensei. She offered that I could come along, but I thought that maybe I have caused her enough trouble. So, I was thinking, I could either move in with the professor, what with Shiho gone and all, or I could ask you."

Kaito looks at him, stunned.

"I know it's quick. You don't have to say-"

"Yes," Kaito breathes, bending down to pull Shinichi into a hug. "Of course I'll have you."

Shinichi laughs.

"Thank you," he whispers in Kaito's ear.

"I can move in later though. I don't want to be in your way, if your mom arrives today."

"Don't worry about that. I'm sure she'll be delighted," Kaito replies, pulling back and moving around Shinichi to pick up his suitcase.

They walk towards the house together. Shinichi wonders if, maybe, he has been in the same situation as the person from Kaito's song. Maybe, he thought he needed to head to the wrong place all along, not aware of where he started from. He does know better now, though.

"Hey, thief," he says, and Kaito turns to him, beaming. "You wouldn't happen to know the way to Mayarí? It sounds like the place to be."

Chapter 21: Da Capo Al Fine

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

The atmosphere in the small bar is at the point of boiling over. Around the tables, a sizable crowd is gathered, despite the rainy, unpleasant weather. The water dripping from the umbrellas by the door has formed a puddle on the ground that reflects the stage lighting. Kaito claps his hands, effortlessly pulling his focus away from it, and shakes a dove out of his sleeve. Lucky coos at him good-naturedly and flies around the room. The audience starts to cheer and applaud.

"You have to excuse her manners. She has been wanting to help me do my show all night long," Kaito says, pretending to be apologetic. "I told her she would get to choose my assistant for the next trick. I hope you're okay with her choice?"

There seems to be general agreement, and Kaito smiles. The bond is particularly calm this evening, his own mind supplying him with his habitual Salsa.

The show works out smoothly, garnering him quite a few compliments and even some tips when the crowd trickles out into the night. A few patrons stay behind, finishing their drinks and talking in lowered voices. Kaito catches a few trying to analyze his tricks and smirks when they fail. He gathers his equipment and puts it into an old leather case that belonged to his father.

"Great show, Kaito-botchama," Jii tells him, when Kaito joins him at the counter.

"Thank you, Jii," Kaito says, accepting the clear drink that Jii places in front of him.

He takes a sniff.

"What is that?" he asks, noticing the strong smell of juniper.

"A Gin and Tonic, young master," Jii replies.

"I'm not twenty, yet, Jii. Aren't you going to get in trouble for giving alcohol to minors?"

Lucky alights on his shoulder, and he holds a treat out to her.

"Well, it's only going to be four more months until June, so I think it will be alright," Jii says with his usual gravity, proceeding to wipe clean a glass.

He is interrupted by another customer's order for a moment, before returning to Kaito.

"You will soon have gathered too many fans for this place, Kaito-botchama. You should think of another venue. Something bigger," he says.

Kaito lifts his glass and watches it closely. There is a slice of lemon and two ice cubes swimming inside, bobbing up and down due to the carbonated tonic. He brings it to his lips and tries a bit. It's sweeter than he thought it would be, though mostly, it tastes a bitter and somewhat fresh. He isn't quite sure he likes it, yet.

"Eventually," he says. "I want to get through with university first, before I focus on building up my career."

"Very sensible choice, Kaito-botchama," Jii agrees.

Kaito sighs and takes another sip of his drink. It's his third show, and the response is quite good, if he is honest. He can see it pick up speed quickly, and he isn't sure that is a good thing. After all, there is still Pandora to find, and a certain degree of anonymity might prove helpful. More than that, however, he is bothered by Shinichi's continued absence.

His Guide has missed all of his shows, so far, having been called to help on the last leg of the journey that is the take-down of the wide-spread crime syndicate he and Haibara-san have been working on, together with their friends at the FBI.

"I'll be back by mid-February, I hope," Shinichi said when he left.

It's almost March now, and there is still no trace of him.

"Are you thinking about your partner, Kaito-botchama?" Jii asks.

"He sounds so old when you call him that, Jii," Kaito complains.

"Well, what would you have me calling him, then?"

"Just call him Shinichi," Kaito says.

"Very well. Are you thinking about young master Shinichi, Kaito-botchama?"

"Is it that obvious?" Kaito asks ruefully.

"Your face gets a certain wistful quality when you do," Jii says.

"Oh, stop it. That makes me think of how Aoko looks when she talks about that new colleague of hers," Kaito groans.

"Isn't it nice that Aoko-sama found someone she is interested in so soon?"

Kaito chuckles. "It is. Still, she won't shut up about it, you know? I can only bear so much gushing over this perfect Guide of hers during our coffee-sessions, while my own is gone. So don't remind me, Jii."

"My apologies," Jii replies and bows his head, even though it wasn't really him who brought it up. A group of guests stops by the counter and pays for their drinks before leaving the bar. "By the way, young master, I wanted to point your attention towards the gentleman that sent you this drink. He said he'd like to speak to you after the show."

"Why didn't you say so immediately?" Kaito asks, confused.

"He said it would be better to wait until the bar was a little emptier."

Kaito turns towards the spot Jii is indicating, and his heart nearly stops.

"How...?"

He reaches for his bond, only now noticing that, due to his own excitement over the show, he didn't feel that Shinichi's side has been nearly completely closed off the entire time.

The man in the corner gets up and leaves the hat he has worn and drawn deeply into his face on the table. He is tall, just as tall as Kaito, and his indigo eyes sparkle even in the dim room. Kaito has crossed it and flung himself into Shinichi's arms in a heartbeat.

"You're back," he whispers into his cheek, as Shinichi laughs and hugs him in return, draws him in, his gentle hands tangled in Kaito's unruly hair.

"I'm back," the detective murmurs and kisses Kaito slowly, passionately.

"You idiot. Why didn't you say something? I would've tried much harder had I known you were in the audience!" Kaito laughs, while simultaneously blinking away some tears that threaten to spill from his eyes.

"Even harder than that? It was already a brilliant show, congratulations. I can't wait to see it on a grand stage, after we've found your diamond and made sure no one ever tries to kill someone for it again," Shinichi says.

"'We'?" Kaito asks quietly.

"Well, you know, I just so happen to be done with bringing down one syndicate, and I find I've got quite a bit of time on my much bigger hands, now," Shinichi chuckles.

"You're going to stay then?" Kaito smiles.

Shinichi grins. "However long you want me to.”

Notes:

And that's it. I'm officially done!!
Many thanks to all of you who've stuck with it until the end. Thank you for kudosing, and thank you so, so much for commenting. Your comments have been so kind and encouraging and just nice that it was a joy to post a new chapter each week. I'll miss you guys :'(
I hope you enjoyed this story. Take care 💙