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Other Words for Desperation

Chapter 2

Summary:

Let's take a look at Vernon's point of view.
And I leave you with this quote:

The same water that softens the potato hardens the egg.

Notes:

Partially inspired by Hoshi's Spider.
Stream Spider, Side by Side, and Silent Boarding Gate.

Spotify playlist updated! This chapter covers songs 14-21

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Playboy shit - blackbear , lil aaron || &burn - Billie Eilish, Vince Staples 

Vernon knew he made a mistake. The moment Seungkwan said yes to his date proposal of meeting at the at.mosphere, he knew he was doomed.

You shouldn't have said yes to me, he thought as flicked through Seungkwan's cozy palette profile. They’ve never said yes to me.

In the months Vernon has spent on Palette, never has he encountered a profile like Seungkwan's. The bright, pastel yellow -no, dandelion - stood out in his sea of deep and dark profiles of poseidon, hunter and wine. He has never had such a light color suggestion. Even Jihoon, who had the misfortune of being suggested to him as a probable match, was a deep ultraviolet. Seeing Seungkwan as the lone light in his gallery of darkness was a thrilling opportunity. He knew he should be content with what he had, but if he didn't have it, then how could he be content?

Ever since he was introduced to Palette, he got hooked. The app that Joshua and his team conceptualized - which landed the American in marginally better graces of Seungcheol's brand of high society - was excellent. At their ages, online dating was deemed an insult. Among their peers, to be found selling yourself for a half an hour release was a stain that could never be removed and never be hidden. They were never supposed to make themselves available for anyone, it should be the other way around. But within his inner circle, the app told a different story. 

Palette became this sort of playground. The app boasted of a data driven algorithm that promised not only a personality assessment but also guaranteed a sense of belonging. People get the people that were cut from the same cloth.

It transformed into a game of trying to figure out who among polite society turned out to be not so polite after all. And it became a pastime for Vernon. It was a low risk, high return investment once he agreed to back up Joshua's ridiculously brilliant app and be part of the trailblazing users. Seungcheol and Jihoon turned their noses up at him for being so eager to be part of the social experiment but he liked to think he was one of the game masters rather than one of the players.

He liked it. He liked the flow of people and how they would eventually fall down before him. Everyone that he has successfully lured and made to want him gave him a satisfying thrill.  It wasn’t cheap validation that he sought, but it was a high that no cocaine could match.

"So, how'd you like our new update?" A voice called out from below. Vernon put his phone down and leant over his table to look out at the green beneath the deck. Just in front of the golf club's quieter restaurants was Joshua. The older waved at him as he alighted from the buggy; followed by Seungcheol who had his face contorted in unsuccessfully concealed distaste.

Vernon grinned at them and gestured for the two to come up. They disappeared from his line of sight and left the caddie to tend to their buggy.  

In a short while, the two made their grand entrance to the restaurant's outdoor deck, followed by the usual simpering members of the staff. Seungcheol only had to hold his hand  up, a signal to leave them alone for now and it amused Vernon to no end how they would always backtrack and scurry. 

Joshua, ever the more affectionate one, despite the fact that Seungcheol was his cousin, came running towards him with a big hug on the ready. The slightly older guy gave him a quick squeeze to the displeasure of his grumpy relative.  

"Hey Shua, bro," Vernon grinned as he came out of the hug. "Nice of you to finally come out of the hiding. I thought hyung here would never let you out of whatever penthouse he's gifted you."

Joshua chuckled, airy and freely, a distinct contrast to Seungcheol's pointed scoff. Vernon turned to his cousin and opened his arms wide. "Hyung! Congratulations on earning your day off from Ji-eun!"

Seungcheol glared at him, yet the older still stepped into the hug. "Good to see you too, Sol. And for the record, I haven't been hiding Shua, he's just been busy with that app of yours."

"And," Joshua added with a warning wave of his finger. "Don't hate on Ji-eun. I can't imagine raising a kid with Seungcheol would be easy, of course she's had to keep the daddy in line."

Vernon laughed, raising his hands up in defense. "Of course, of course, my mistake. How's the twins, hyung? They're still asking for you every night?"

"Just an odd night or two," Seungcheol said with a shrug. They took their seats and Joshua  signalled for the menu offerings.

"Ji-eun has finally got them believing that our setup was not that bad so there are less tantrums now,” Seungcheol continued. “Less calls at midnight, that’s for sure.”

"So you're not staying in Ji-eun's house now?" Vernon queried, he caught the elbow of the waiter with the menu before the guy left. "Bring us an ashtray, and a round of Hirsch."

"Of course he isn't," Joshua replied with an incredulity in his voice as the man lit up his slim stick. "Good thing you asked for the ashtray, I haven't smoked since we started living together and this guy got midnight calls. But you would have known that if you didn't keep refusing our invitations for dinner."

Vernon laughed but lifted up a knuckle to fist bump Joshua. "Oh wow, congrats bro. And of course, I know you, Shun-hyung. But hey, look at you, keeping the house and the man."

The older smiled smugly and inhaled deeply; he bumped their fists together. "God works in mysterious ways." Joshua puffed out a smoke and blew it playfully in Seungcheol's direction. "He definitely touched Ji-eun's heart and opened her mind to understanding Cheol's and my situation."

Seungcheol plucked off the lit cigarette in Joshua' fingers, snorting before he took a long drag. "God, alright. I guess her own penthouse and a guaranteed place in Dwight School didn't do anything to get her to understand us."

"Oh Cheolie, you talk as if you'd ever let your kids live in the slums," Joshua chided lightly as he leant on Seungcheol. "Besides, you are seriously underestimating Ji-Eun. She's a nice girl, your dad wouldn't have chosen her for you if she wasn't."

For that Seungcheol had no reply, instead the oldest just returned the stick of cigarette to his lover. Vernon watched his older cousin defer to Joshua and it was a fascinating sight to behold. Choi Seungcheol was one of the most uncompromising people that he has known but to Joshua, his hyung became much more agreeable.

"Wow," Vernon whistled out and admired the American's ability at the same time, the waiter finally came to drop off their shots and the ashtray. "Are you sure you can't quit your developer job and sit-in in one of our meetings instead? Hyung always flies off the handles."

Seungcheol tutted; Vernon could tell his hyung was itching to berate him but Joshua's warning pat had him backing down. "You know I can't, Hansol. Palette's my baby. Speaking of-- since you're the only one useful to the growth of Palette, how do you like the newest update we rolled out?"

"Hey, I also invested in Palette!" Seungcheol cut in, grumbling much like a giant baby deprived of attention. 

"I know, Cheollie, but you don't want to beta test for me, so you're only slightly useful to my baby," Joshua cheekily returned.

"Jihoon's beta testing for you," Seungcheol shot back petulantly.

Vernon restrained himself from rolling his eyes, it was just so obvious how much Seungcheol disdained his involvement in the app.

"And," Joshua lifted up his pointer finger, "He doesn't give me feedback ever since Jeonghan tied him down," he explained, hoping to placate his partner, before turning to face Vernon. "Now, only Hansol's my hope. So? Sollie, how's it?"

"How's what?" Vernon asked with a brow raised as he took his newly refilled glass of bourbon. He sniffed at it and looked expectantly at Joshua. 

"The new update? You know, the small glimpse of the other color groups?"

In nary a second, Seungkwan's smiling photo popped up in his brain as if it was called up. An update, huh.

"It's not a glitch?"

"No," Joshua shook his head. "It's something to spice things up. You get users who have their typical shade, tint, tone, and hue groups and it gets boring after. But if you introduced different gradations , say a tint into your shade, or a hue in your tone groups then that makes it unfamiliar right? Wouldn't you say you'd be tempted to find out more about them?"

Vernon hummed. So it wasn't a glitch. "I see, was it an experimental release?"

"Sort of. Only a few users have it for now."

Seungcheol  tried to stay disinterested and unbothered but he wasn't able to hide it well, grumbling he asked. "Shua, really, I love you but do you need to give Hansol any more reasons to stay addicted to your app?"

 

Vernon stilled at his cousin's poorly disguised judgmental tone and he attempted to tamp down the irritation by gulping yet another shot. His cousin wasn't typically a man to pry into others' business, but that courtesy seemed to apply only to outsiders. As the oldest Choi-Chwe cousin that was still part of the family business, Seungcheol seemed to take on the hat of another unnecessary father. Their latest and longest running point of contention would be Shua's Palette and Vernon's disappointing inability to become a man of respect and of upright standing (Seungcheol's words, not his). For some reason, his older cousin didn't find it hypocritical to harp on his back for being a free kind of man. The older always extolled the virtues of becoming a responsible, family man, and yet here Seungcheol was, flaunting his real love in an exclusive golfing restaurant, far away from his family of three.

Sometimes, people do have it all. And even through it all, they still find it in themselves to judge. Typical.

"So you've seen it?" Joshua interrupted Vernon's musing. "You've got a tint suggestion instead of your usual shades and tones?"

Vernon nodded, clearing the thoughts of jealousy in his mind. Joshua didn't deserve to witness just how much he wanted to eviscerate his cousin for being such a hypocrite, a hypocrite who got to eat his cake and have it too. It just wasn't fair. He cleared his throat and straightened in his seat and thought back to Seungkwan instead.

"It's different, I suppose," he started, thinking of what response would get Seungcheol off his trail the quickest. "But I don't think I would like more of the tints."

Joshua's disappointment was palpable as the developer sank into his chair, wincing, he asked. "Bad match huh? Maybe we still need to tweak the algorithm."

Bad match? Seungkwan wasn't bad, he was just someone Vernon couldn't read. That was something Joshua didn't need to learn about though. His inability to anticipate how a tinted palette would respond to him was no fault of the app, nor the developer. Nonetheless, that didn't mean that Vernon couldn't influence Joshua into removing that crippling feature altogether.

"I don't know if it was a bad match per se," he hummed. "More of it being a mistake, there's a reason similar people band together you know."

The shades and tones in Vernon's palettes never said yes to invitations to at.mosphere. That he could understand, no self respecting scion of the society would bring out their deep-seated secrets in a stage as public as at.mosphere. Contrary to what people liked to think, the at.mosphere was production designed for the statement. It's exclusivity was not for discretion; it was for private shows of how the wheels of society were run.

So it was refreshing, and at the same time utterly terrifying that someone bit on his bait. Seungkwan looked to be quite a catch, if Vernon was honest with himself (and with Joshua), but not every big catch was meant to be kept. Some of the biggest catches, Vernon was taught to let go.

"That's a useful insight," Joshua pointed out. "I'll get the team to run some FGDs and try to smooth it out."

Vernon nodded and Seungcheol, who had long tuned them out, caught Joshua's attention with the leather bound menu. 

The couple was fully occupied with ordering for their post sixth hole lunch, so he took the chance to send Hangyeol a single line.  

Oxygen. Saturday.

I can't let go now.

Because Vernon may be all the bad things a rich and attractive scion could be, but one thing he wasn't was a reneger. He promised Seungkwan a date, and a date the other would get. 

Rich Niggaz - J.Cole

Where would Vernon be without his intelligence?

Nowhere, that's where.

Friday morning found him browsing through the numerous files that his trusted sent. An ordinary person would have probably relied on social media to know more about their online paramours, but Vernon was no ordinary man. There was no such thing as data privacy if said data was bought by him. However he used it was at his discretion.

He sat inside the cramped little studio that Jihoon liked to work in, savouring the quiet and stillness as he stared at Boo Seungkwan's passport photo. 

 Boo Seungkwan.

A native of Jeju.

26 years old, will be 27 in 4 months.

 A Capricorn, a voice that suspiciously sounded like Hangyeol sounded in his mind. Tough match, but fruitful if you worked on it.  

He chuckled. Maybe Hangyeol's earlier foray into astrology stuck to him after all. If it was going to be fruitful indeed, he would have to wait and play his cards right. 

On Palette, Seungkwan tried hard to hide himself without truly hiding who he was. Despite the very obvious intention of masking how he looked like through  a plethora of in-action shots, artfully cropped selcas, and group photos that had too many faces, Seungkwan's persona still showed through. There was a feeling of pride in the way the younger man arranged his own moodboard. There were glints of gold from the record of awards, a shine that only marketers and advertisers hound on and a warmth that only a deep passion can create. And it all made sense, now that Vernon was looking at a snapshot of his date's life in his hands.

He continued browsing the file and it only proved to be an interesting one. Seungkwan was shaping up to be a brilliant gem of a boy, in every sense of the word, the more he flipped the pages of the report. 

The younger man was a talent in the making at singing, as evidenced by the files compiled list of awards in amateur and professional singing contests. Vernon believed that had he met the guy earlier, they would be having a vastly different relationship. Maybe, if they did meet, then the list of awards for singing wouldn't have stopped just to be replaced with awards in marketing and entrepreneurship. 

Vernon had to give it to him, Seungkwan was so decorated, even at his young age and despite his common status. The guy wasn't quite famous, but that was a fault of upbringing and the lack of an opportunity, that he was sure of. It still didn't make Seungkwan any less accomplished.

"Please tell me that's not another fuck buddy." The door opened with the owner of the studio walking in.

Vernon looked up from his seat and smiled thinly at Jihoon. "Onyx applicant," he said smoothly as he quickly hid Seungkwan's details. "Missed you at golf yesterday."

"I don't have time to bake under the sun and putt little balls." Jihoon threw his bag on the couch and stood impatiently over Vernon. "I'm not like you."

"Oh come on, Jihoonie," Vernon chastised the younger. He could see huge eyebags and a gaunt shadow on the other's face and it was not at all surprising. He stood up and placed his hands on the younger's shoulders. "What's the use of being an executive if you can't skive off once in a while? You're working yourself ragged, again."

Jihoon tsked and artfully maneuvered himself out of Vernon's hold. He sat down on the chair, his chair, that the older vacated and turned his back to Vernon. "What are you doing here anyway?"

Vernon sighed and leaned back on an empty wall. He couldn't blame Jihoon for being so prickly, but still, it felt a little like rejection. "I just needed a place to think."

The Onyx studios were typically located on the mid levels of the building, however Jihoon's Universe Factory (as the younger liked to call his studio) was located on the third basement level. The commercial lifts didn't go all the way down to the third basement level, one would have to walk on the stairs to access it. That alone gave anyone who stayed on this floor premium privacy.

"You've got an entire floor for your brain. You don't need my little dungeon of thinking," Jihoon said as he booted up his system.

Vernon shrugged as if Jihoon could see it. "Well, before you came in and took over this space, this was my little dungeon of thoughts so I'm sorry if I fell back on my habit."

"Uh-huh, habit. "

Vernon cleared his throat, grasping for something to talk about. "So uh, how are you and Jeonghan hyung? I haven't seen you both on our golf weekends. Is he, - alright?"

Jihoon nodded. "You know how he is."

Vernon sucked in his teeth and counted to ten. "By the way, I saw your palette. Ultraviolet huh, like your entire studio."

It took a while for Jihoon to respond. "Yeah, Jeonghan chose the pictures."

"He's not mad you're on there?" Vernon couldn't help himself from asking.

"Is this about Cheol hyung and his love hate relationship with Shua hyung's app?"

"No?" Vernon answered unsurely, though he was tempted to add that it was with himself that Seungcheol had a love-hate relationship with, not the little app. "No. It's not about Cheol hyung. It's just, well you know Jeonghan and you know how his family was...I thought he'd-"

"What? Hide me away like you did before? Or how Cheol hyung's hiding Joshua hyung?" Jihoon snipped quickly, there was a marked exhaustion in his voice and yet Vernon knew it was not done maliciously. The younger has always been straightforward to a fault. "Just because you're far removed cousins doesn't mean you share the same views."

Vernon didn't have an answer to that. 

"Anyway, Jeonghan's on it too," Jihoon continued nonetheless. "You know him. He's turned it into a whole marketing  experiment. He probably has students analyzing his and my profile hits and interactions."

"Not unlikely," Vernon said, thankful for the redirection.

The silence stretched on between them and Vernon knew he should get moving and leave Jihoon alone but he couldn't bring himself to leave the studio. 

"So," Jihoon broke the quiet. "Did you finish your thinking?"

Vernon perked up. "Not really...I don't think I ever really thought when I was here. This is just a good place for me, you know."

"I know," Jihoon echoed. 

"I'll see you around, Jihoonie," Vernon said, giving the studio and the man a last lingering gaze. He closed his eyes and shook away all the mental images before turning around to face the door, hand ready on the knob. "Golf with us,next week?"

It was only then that Jihoon swiveled in his chair to face the older's retreating back. "Sure, sure I'll see you around."

 

 

Vernon closed the door to the Universe Factory feeling very much unsettled. He should be used to it, years with Jihoon has left him feeling unstable most of the times they interacted, but he never really thought too hard about it. But now, it made him wonder about the nerves he felt with each of his exchanges with Seungkwan.  It didn't seem so similar, but it was too familiar for his liking. 

He was on the second basement level of the fire escape stairs on his way up to the office lobby when he got a phone call from Hangyeol. 

"Hello, brat."

"Is that really a way to talk to someone you're asking favors from, oppa?" She returned unamused.

Vernon just huffed in response. 

"So the Oxygen," she continued. "Anything I should know about? There is a waiting line for that room, you know?"

Honesty was always the best policy between him and his sibling. "Nothing, just fancied a date."

"A date?" She shrieked out, it was a good thing Vernon had a sense to take his phone off his ears. 

"Get a hold of yourself, Gyeol."

"A date? You've never dated anyone since then! Are you sure about this? Are you getting threatened? What the hell were you thinking? And at.mosphere too? Cheol oppa, appa and Harabeonim would certainly get a whiff of that. I thought you wanted them off your back!”

Hangyeol was quickly becoming hysterical in her questions and Vernon couldn’t disassociate himself fast enough. His last message to Seungkwan, a flirty message of “Can’t wait, see you <3” looped maddeningly in his head.

“I don’t know, okay,” he said as he stood, waiting for something, in front of the door that leads out to the grand lobby. "Plus, that is precisely why I asked for Oxygen. Cheol hyung could never learn about this. Just have your best guy serve us. I'll triple--quadruple pay his hours. All I know is I need to do this. I cannot not do this."

"Of course you can," she harrumphed. "Say no. I'm sure rejection is quite the norm for others. Tell him you were testing him. Unless of course he's just not another body."

"You make it sound like I'm doing a bad thing."

"Oppa, you know I'm the last person to judge you," she paused. "But can't I be concerned at the very least? Do you even know this guy?"

"Of course I do," Vernon rushed to answer.

"No," she hit back plainly. "What I meant was do you know this guy apart from what's been printed for you?"

Vernon bit his lip and his grip on the phone tightened. He didn't know Seungkwan, that was true, but what was so bad about wanting and trying to know him that everyone seems to be so against it? "That's why I wanted Oxygen, Gyeol. I am trying to know this guy."

There was only white noise. Vernon wondered if she had hung up on him but he was relieved to hear the unmistakable smacking of lips when she was thinking deeply.

"You're trying," she repeated. "Ok. That's ok. That's good. At least you're trying. Wow. That's something. Wow."

Vernon grinned at her inability to form a coherent response. It was very rare that he would get to stump his little sister. Somehow, despite being older, Gyeol always knew more than him and always had a ready answer for everything. 'Yeah, I am. I'm trying."

"What gives? Why now? It's not that I'm not happy for you. I just don't understand," she cried out. 

Vernon chucked softly and twisted the door open, stepping into the sunlit office lobby. "I didn't expect him to say yes, you know. He responded immediately. I don't know if I felt challenged to not back down, or if it intrigued me to the point of temporary insanity."

"Oh, oppa. You’re way in over your head, aren’t you?"

He looked around at his bright surroundings, and tried his eyes to get acclimated to the change in lighting coming from the darkness of Jihoon's underground studio. "You know what, Gyeol, I just may be."

"Alright then, that only means you really need help." She sounded so determined to help him out, and it warmed Vernon to have her trust. The determination though soon turned into a berating. "Don’t screw this up. And if you keep asking for oxygen, let me know in advance, ok. I can’t stand all these uppity bitches asking me if I know who the fuck they are."

Vernon laughed. "You should have told them that you own the whole place and their homes, probably. "

"Meh," she dismissed. "It’s better this way. I don’t have to deal with the sycophants and the fakeness. It’s a real good way to weed out the real nasties too."

"If you say so, Gyeol." For a moment, Vernon was glad he never had to deal with the more public properties of their company. "Thanks Gyeol, I really owe you."

"No, oppa, you don’t owe me! You owe my daughters though so you better show up sometime. Hopefully with this oxygen date of yours."

"We’ll see, we’ll see."

"Bye, oppa! Love you!"

"Love you too, Gyeolie."

Talking to Myself - Gallant

Saturday mornings for Vernon usually went like this: roll out of bed, take a Tylenol for his migraine and spend 15 minutes sitting on his bed, dazed, wondering if he had Leo today or not.

Leo was his and Hangyeol's cat. When Hangyeol got married and was allowed to move out of the Chwe Hanok, it became a huge issue of where Leo would live. While Vernon didn't live in the hanok anymore, he visited it often enough to be able to imprint on the tomcat. 

Hangyeol, initially, volunteered to take Leo, but the old menace, sticking to his high-maintenance image, refused to live with just her. After weeks of Leo pretending to limp around her penthouse and refusing to eat his wet food, she realised that maybe, the cat was missing his other owner; so she drove Leo down to La Marquise and handed him off to Vernon. 

That night, Leo feasted on wet food as his self-imposed hunger strike ended, and he also stopped limping. It was funny then, but months of basically following Leo's preference of where to live without any notice got just a little bit tiring. 

Leo has been with Vernon for almost two weeks now. Last night, the cat refused his wet food and decided not to sleep on the bed with him. That only meant one thing, it was time to send him off to Hangyeol's.

But first, Vernon needed to find him.

He found Leo glaring at him when he checked on the shoes in the entryway. 

"Wow, aren't you roaring to go?" He said to the cat as he crouched down to take a pic of the huge ball of grump and fur. "You're really a smart cat. You probably felt that I'm going to have a big night tonight and decided to leave me in peace."

"Mreow."

He took a photo and immediately attached it as a message to Seungkwan. He paused. And then he scrolled back up in his conversations. 

Fuck me. I'm going crazy, he thought as he read through every single time that he was the one to text first in the morning. He bit his lip as his thumb hovered over the send button. It's six am, and the first thing I do is text Seungkwan, great. 

He shook his head, put the phone down on the entry table and picked Leo up so he could start preparing the cat's travel bag. 

That's it, he mentally patted himself on the back. Leave the phone right there and busy yourself so you won't be tempted to text Seungkwan again like a needy partner. For the seventh day in a row.

That was some strange habit he has recently developed. For some reason, despite the fact that Seungkwan never woke up before 7 am, Vernon has been pretty consistent in sending the younger "Good morning" messages and random thoughts as soon as he woke up. It was weird because firstly, he hated texting and instant messaging. And secondly, it was insane to develop a communication habit with a person he only knew for seven days. 

He padded to his kitchen and sighed in relief when he found the kitty travel bag packed neatly on the counter. After checking that Leo had enough to survive a week or two at Hangyeol's, he set Leo down in front of the feeding station. Leo munched happily on the kibbles and Vernon felt a very strong urge to rush back to the entryway to retrieve his phone and send a video to Seungkwan.

Seungkwan, again. 

He let his head fall forward to rest on the cold marble. "Leo, I am being stupid right?"

The cat just continued eating.

"If I text him now, would that make it look like I'm too eager? Too sweet?" He sighed and straightened up. "How do I even go about confirming tonight for him? He could have just said yes at the moment. What if he made excuses, Leo?"

Leo looked up from his bowl and opened his mouth wide only to lick it. Without a sound, the cat returned to his food and continued to ignore his owner.

"Hangyeol would be pretty pissed if I canceled Oxygen."

This time Leo stopped feeding and stared at his owner like he was an idiot. "Mreow. Mreow."

"You're right. I have to convince him not to cancel tonight," Vernon gave the old cat a pat on the head which Leo promptly hissed at before jumping off the counter. He didn't mind too much though, he knew Leo was temperamental, plus he already had his back turned.

Leaving the cat in the kitchen, he made his way back to the entryway and grabbed his phone. Unlocking it, he saw Leo's grumpy face still waiting to be sent to Seungkwan. 

I am too old to be worrying about how I would be perceived. So what if he thinks I'm pathetic? I can't be pathetic anyway, I own 20% of Seoul.

And so, he told the truth. The truth about Leo's predetermined date at Hangyeol's and the eventual fallout that would happen if Leo was not rehomed this weekend. If Vernon ended up implying that Seungkwan's confirmation for the date was a pretty big deciding factor for Leo's week, then he would completely deny that. So he pressed the send button and exited out of Palette, knowing full well that the younger would not respond so quickly. Instead of waiting for a response that would come in hours later, he rang up Serim and told the driver one thing : "It's time to pick up the lion."

 


Vernon liked to keep his weekends full of all his favorite activities. Mid-mornings were spent outside; either practicing his swing at the country club, or training with Mustard Seed at the cross country. However, today, he didn't feel like doing either.

After Serim picked Leo up, Vernon found himself sitting restlessly on his couch in front of an open TV that looped the La Marquise infomercials. He knew he should be taking his breakfast now, and Serim even left him with his usual order of coffee and waffles plus a stern reminder of his morning medicines, but he didn't feel hungry at all.

He closed his eyes and for the nth time this week, asked why he was feeling this way but still found no answer. There were only a handful of times in his life that he felt this antsy. The frightening thing was, all these feelings of dread that settled deep in his stomach enough to keep him full have always been related to his relationships.

In his earlier years, his problems were all about his identity. Struggling and trying to find out who he was, what he was and what he wanted consumed his sober waking hours and left him keyed up. Coming out wasn't even an option for him but he still wished to define himself. 

Maturity brought him security in his identity despite the fact that only a few people truly knew him. Not even his parents knew; but if his mother had an inkling, then he wouldn't put it past her. She was brilliant and one of the only people who understood him best.

So when identity stopped keeping him thinking in answerless questions, it was Jihoon who reignited that loop in his brain. Jihoon was 22 when he was 28. A bright little production assistant at the Onyx when he was still trying to prove to his father that of course, he could run a department on his own.  

At 45, Jihoon no longer played endlessly in his mind. It has been years since then, and it took years to cover up the disquiet with loud things but Vernon managed fine. He knew it was only his age that allowed him to let go without putting up a fight, and he was proud of the product of the sum of all his years. But Seungkwan was making him hold on needlessly and even consider a fighting chance.

He opened his eyes. He knew what to do. If his body was itching for a fight, then he would have to give it a fight.

BOY - Aaron Porter

Vernon ended up spending the rest of the day in the gym and in the ring. He only looked at his phone once during the entire time he was out fighting weights and sandbags and that was hours ago. Even though he was bone tired from all the shit he voluntarily put himself through, he was still feeling on edge.

It was already 6:30 pm and in thirty minutes, hopefully the source of his frenetic fretting would show up and be able to dial it down for him. A twirling phone in hand and with nothing else to do, he decided to check up on Seungkwan who was quiet for the most part of the day save for some text this morning.

Vernon (Mulberry Purple)

 Seungkwan, you'll need to go to a separate lobby for at.mosphere

I'd try to tell you where it is but I'm terrible at directions

You would only end up lost

And I'm sure we wouldn't like that

Anyway, there will be staff to help you.

See you in a few :)

 Leo’s absence kept his mind free to run circles around his date. If only he had something to look at, then that could probably break off the cycle in his head. He pocketed his phone, stood up, and decided that waiting would be better done somewhere else. He took his coat and one last look in the hallway mirror to fix the way his hair fell. He wasn’t a vain man at the very least, and most people would have him pegged as someone who didn’t care much for fashion, but being presentable was always a bonus. After all, he didn’t want to scare or intimidate Seungkwan away; he just hoped he’d be as charming as he made himself out to be.

Coming to the lobby to observe people was just a way to settle his nerves. For a while, he just watched people. They varied little : there were the very few neighbours he knew, the usual group of more well-off tourists who clearly had dining arrangements in one of the hotel’s numerous restaurants, and the faces of the staff who bowed at him with familiarity. He sat, not too stiff, and not too relaxed, in one of the generously upholstered armchairs in the lobby cafe and had a perfect view of all the arriving guests. All in all, everything was of the norm, but still different enough to keep him distracted.

He saw Seungkwan as soon as his date entered the lobby of La Marquise. It wasn't like he intended to wait and stalk his date. It was only natural that he became more alert to the presence of his date as the time to meet came closer.  If he was able to identify Seungkwan only by the shade of his hair and the curve of his cheeks, then no one would actually know.

What he imagined of Seungkwan in the flesh was not too far from the pictures he was given and the person he was observing. If there was any difference though, it would be the fact that the younger was smaller, smaller than he imagined. And that Seungkwan apparently tried his best to fit in.

Seungkwan looked good, but the suit won't hold up to scrutiny in a more refined company. People who dressed like Seungkwan were usually the ones who wanted to impress; they were keen on blending in without acknowledging the fact that they would never fit in. They were the ones Vernon usually ignored. They were the kind of people who wanted a taste of the elite and chased it in ways he found just a little bit despicable. Of course he wouldn't do anything to crush them, but he didn't extend any help either. 

But Seungkwan, this Boo Seungkwan, in probably the best suit he could afford, was different. He didn't pretend to not gape at everything, and he didn't act like a wannabe social climber either. In fact, The younger just stood frozen on the spot. It was like the whole La Marquise got him in some kind of a hold. He looked like a fish out of water and Vernon had the unquenchable urge to bring him water, bring him back to life.

So he did. 

Vernon stood up from his perch on the cafe lounge and walked purposefully towards his date's direction. He put on his sunglasses and deliberately bumped into Boo Seungkwan.

That got Seungkwan moving. The man swung around with fire in his eyes. He looked rightfully angry. But the anger subsided, only to be replaced by a confused staring and then some sort of judgment.

"Sorry, sorry. Are you okay?" Vernon asked, amping up the concern in his voice and also taking the moment to hold onto the younger's shoulders. 

The judgment was gone in a matter of nanoseconds, and Seungkwan reverted to a detached politeness that only proved the younger's humility. Seungkwan gave him a slight grin and a dismissive nod that everything was fine.

It wasn't a huge bumping accident so it was unlikely that there would be a problem. Still he held onto the younger and even turned him around to check if anything was out of place. Eventually he had to relinquish his grip on Seungkwan because if he didn't, it may count as harassment but before he did, he gave  the younger a cheeky little grin. "See you around."

He stalked off to the private lobby for the residences, trying hard not to go back and be the one to guide Seungkwan to the restaurant. He nearly did a 180 just so he could make sure the younger was not going to chicken out, but he was already too close to the private lifts. 

"Going up again, Mr.Chwe?"  Munyeong, the security staff and lift operator asked as he contemplated his next move.

"Yeah, please." Munyeong was a good guy, of all the security personnel, he seemed to be the one who had an easy smile and an unafraid personality. 

"To your home?"

"Nope, Oxygen please."

"Of course sir, take Lift C. Enjoy your dinner sir."

He went to the third lift that exclusively served the restaurant floors and grinned at the staff member.  "I will, definitely, thanks again. See you tomorrow, Munyeong. Have a good night."

The doors of the lift closed before he could even hear Munyeong bid him goodnight. He was soon stuck alone in the glass walled box that looked out to the Han River. It was always a sight to behold, but he was used to this. Unbidden, the thought of how Seungkwan would react to this kind of view rose to the forefront of his mind. He shook his head free of those thoughts.

That's for the future and you gotta secure that future first , Chwe Hansol.

Guilty Conscience - 070 Shake

The door to oxygen was slid shut. Behind it was the boy (the man?) that should be the balm to his agitation. He inhaled deeply and thanked the heavens that Hangyeol wasn't present to laugh at his nerve wracked state. He cleared his throat and knocked twice on the door.

There was no response. But to be fair, The Oxygen was fully sound-proofed; there would be no way to find out if a party or a murder was occurring inside the room. Only the two people inside The Oxygen could have truly known what happened inside.

He held the doorknob in his hand and closed his eyes as he pulled it open to the side, opening them only when he heard the door hit the jamb.

Seungkwan stood in front of him with eyes wide open and a slight flush on his face. It was sort of endearing; Vernon could read the hesitation and feel the nerves in the younger and for a moment, he was glad that he wasn't the only one who felt as awful. 

Although, the Seungkwan that stood before him now seemed to be an entirely different person from the one Vernon just held a few moments ago. It wasn't at all bad, in fact Vernon could go as far to say that Seungkwan looked impossibly better than before.  He wanted to remain rooted in his spot and just study Seungkwan like a piece de resistance in his very own gallery; his very own Nu couché, but Seungkwan seemed like he wasn't breathing and it was up to Vernon to shake him up.

So Vernon stepped up and offered his hand, in what he hoped was his most confident tone, he greeted his date. "You looked better in person than your blurred pics. You weren't lying when you said you were the pride of Jeju."

"You're Vernon?!" Seungkwan couldn't seem to keep the incredulity out of his voice, eyes widening even further and the younger still hasn't made any move to meet Vernon's hand in a shake.

This was new, Vernon thought as he raised his untouched hand to his nape sheepishly.  Most of his dates didn't start out so awkwardly like this; but that was more because his palette meetings were kept strictly in the confines of a nondescript hotel room. He supposed he could be blamed for this discomfort that he brought upon himself. He looked around and felt that the once intimate Oxygen has become much more spacious and too ostentatious for such a folly. Still, he soldiered on. 

"Yeah, that's me," he paused and switched his attention to the table. "Should we sit down?"

Without waiting for a yes, Vernon quickly took Seungkwan's left hand. It was cold, and a bit clammy but he didn't mind. He had to let go of Seungkwan's hand as soon as he led them to the table though. Just like all his etiquette classes taught him, he pulled out the chair for his date. 

"Sit, Seungkwan," he said."I don't think we would be served standing up." 

Seungkwan mutely sat down, almost at a loss. Vernon just grinned at him, despite the curious rumbling in his ears and sat down too. Although he tried his best not to hide away from Seungkwan, the guy's unresponsiveness has become unnerving at this point. He didn't know what to think of it. Was there something on his face?  Was the younger so shocked at this whole thing? It couldn't be the fact that the younger was in the at.mosphere now, he had time to acclimatize. Nor could it be blamed on shyness, Vernon never really pegged him as the shy type, at least based on their conversations. 

 

There was something that clearly bothered Seungkwan...and Vernon knew, deep inside, it could be the fact that he must be way older than the typical online dating demographic, but he wasn't ready to admit to that just yet. He chuckled lightly in an effort to brush the off feeling away and to break the awkwardness. 

That seemed to do the trick, Seungkwan shook his head as if he had been awakened from a trance that he was in for the last minute. "Sorry, sorry, you must think I'm weird."

"No, no," Vernon was quick to interrupt, sure he was confused but he knew that it wasn't Seungkwan who was weird in this whole situation. "It's me who has made this weird huh, I mean. You must be wondering what a 45 year old man is doing?"

Seungkwan couldn't have dropped his mouth any wider. "Forty-five?"

It was a good thing that Vernon wasn't holding to anything, he wouldn't have known what he would have done. He would have probably dropped whatever his imagined object was, but it was likely as well that he would have gripped it tighter. Right now, his hands desperately wanted to grasp at something, even itching to reach for Seungkwan's hands that were hidden from him. For the first time in a long time, he felt his age as the strength from his core was sapped at Seungkwan's echo. A part of him wanted to beg, but he didn't know how and what for. All he knew was how to manage a crisis and offer a compromise.

"I'm sorry." Vernon tried to go for a nonchalant tone, but his voice sounded so thick in his ears. He had his eyes peeled on the moon winking behind Seungkwan and all he could hear was the man's soft whisper of wow; though he wasn't too sure how he should take it. "If you're uncomfortable, I won't stop you from leaving. We haven't ordered anything anyway, it won't be a waste."

"No, I'm not leaving." 

That took his eyes off the moon only to land on the younger's earnest face.

"I just -it's a lot to take in, you know."

"I know," Vernon nodded. It was understandable. A part of him thought that he ought to be incensed by the way all this is making him feel a lot smaller and a lot less accomplished. But the indignation couldn’t win out because he was mostly relieved that Seungkwan didn't choose to run away from him despite everything. "And, I'm sorry for springing this up on you. I just really wanted to meet you before I ruined it."

And this, Vernon could admit to himself and himself alone,  must be the first time he ever spoke so candidly. He wanted to take back his confession. It seemed so pathetic, so unbecoming to apologize and then fail to contain his eagerness. Even Hangyeol would have scoffed at him had she witnessed all of this. It didn’t feel like him, but at the same time, he knew it was also a hundred percent him . He didn't think he actually meant what he texted Seungkwan hours, even days ago, but it turned out to be a latent truth that had such an unfortunate timing in revealing itself. 

And despite all his bravado, Vernon couldn’t deny that a date like this would raise hackles. There was no denying the fact that Seungkwan was well within his rights to feel disgusted and to storm out of the room. Vernon wouldn't stop him even if he wanted to. But, when Seungkwan started shaking his head, it lit an ember of hope in Vernon.

"You didn't ruin anything!" Seungkwan offered reassuringly.

And just like that younger let the ember smolder within him. Vernon only hoped it wouldn't burn out or burn them in the future.

Sleeping with a Friend - Neon Trees (ASTR Remix)

If someone told Vernon years ago that he would have a lap full of feverish, burning male flesh, writhing and willing to prove his desire for him; Vernon would have smirked smugly back at that person and responded with a haughty "Of course." That was a given. Vernon didn't like to think he had a reputation that needed reformation but those who were close enough to comment on the state of his lap would know well. He was very sure that he would never find himself empty of someone who would be in want and that the other person would be left in shambles and most definitely begging.

This though, if someone told Vernon that this specific iteration of a yearning man would happen in the future; he would have laughed them out of the room. He would have scoffed and claimed that whoever that person was never really knew him. Because he was sure he would never be caught dead letting someone undo him like this in a public place, let alone after what most people would call a romantic date and certainly not after hoping and praying that said man wouldn't reject him. No, he has never ever let power run away from him so recklessly, he was and always would have had the upper hand.

And yet here he was; so grateful and too shy to take what he wanted. It was very much unlike the past episodes of him who would always chase his satisfaction first.

Seungkwan was draped on him like a blanket, hips still and heavy on top of his own but the younger's mouth was trailing kisses against the shadow on his throat. It would have made for such a sinful experience but it just felt like an undeserved grace. An encounter of the holy kind with every shifting of weight.

Vernon wasn't drunk, he's had a high tolerance for alcohol developed and honed over the years but he felt intoxicated. Seungkwan was surrounding him, from the rough material of the younger's suit against his bare forearms, to the soft cheek that was pressed firmly to his stubbled chin. He could smell peppermint from the younger's hair and the citrus and spicy accords of Bleu De Chanel stamped on his skin.

"You scare me," he found himself breathing out in between Seungkwan's light touches to his nape. He moved back a little so he could look at the younger properly; he locked his eyes on Seungkwan's darkened ones. "And I don't know why."

Seungkwan quirked up the corner of his lip. "Funny. You do the same thing for me."

He smiled at the younger before leaning forward to give him a peck on the mouth. "Then, that's one more thing we have in common, wouldn't you say?"

Seungkwan nodded, face adorned with a cute pout. "So it is…"

Vernon brought his arms around Seungkwan's hips and pulled him flush against his chest. Seungkwan tucked his head underneath his chin and Vernon rubbed the other's back comfortingly. The chair was tight around them, but even the discomfort did not take away anything from this surreal moment. Vernon even had the strong urge to start squeezing Seungkwan just to see if everything was real, but he was able to stop himself in time. The cramping alone was proof enough that this was real, no fever dream would let him feel the pins and needles as vividly so he moved his  leg a bit and stretched. 

Seungkwan must have noticed because in an instant, he untucked himself from under Vernon and stared at him with concern. The younger guy brushed Vernon's bangs lightly. "Am I heavy? Do you need me to get off you?"

"You're not heavy, I can take you." Vernon jostled his legs slightly to prove his claim. "Do you feel comfortable in this chair? Isn't it a bit too tight? I'm worried for your knees."

Seungkwan leant back away from him before pulling himself off from Vernon's lap.  "Sorry about that."

There was a blush on his cheeks that Vernon wanted to kiss away but it was already too far from his reach. He opened his arms wide and gestured for Seungkwan to come back. 

Seungkwan stood over him, staring.

Vernon raised a brow at him. "Well?"

"I wish I never met you."

Vernon crossed his leg and brought back his outstretched arm in. For someone who claimed not to be tipsy, Seungkwan's serious tone sobered Vernon up real quick. He put his arm up on one of the padded armrests, brought a finger up to his forehead and stared back at Seungkwan unflinchingly. "Where do you get your confidence from, Mr Boo? You could bottle it up and make millions from it."

Seungkwan pushed off from the table. "I'm only confident when I'm right."

"Wishing you never met me is not a matter of right or wrong."

"One thing you don't know about me, Mr.Vernon," Seungkwan started, his face inches away from Vernon. To Vernon, Seungkwan smelled like sweet wine and looked like maraschino cherries. "Is that I can predict the future."

"Oh, can you?"

Seungkwan nodded, closed his eyes and hung his head. "That's right! I have a good sixth sense. It's more than a gut feeling. I can totally tell how things would always end."

"You must be fun at movies."

Seungkwan shrugged. "I really am. It's not my fault people don't see the patterns around them and what would happen next."

"Ah," Vernon stood up and taking advantage of Seungkwan's unawareness, he pulled the younger male into his arms. With one hand supporting Seungkwan's lower back and the other gripping the other's hand; they looked ready to start a waltz without music. "Can you tell me how this night would end?" 

"We'll share one last kiss - say our goodbyes and never see each other again." 

Seungkwan stared at him like he was  trying to get Vernon to believe it too. "Is that how you want it to end, or is it how you think it would end?"

"Despite everything I said earlier, of wanting to know you and being absolute- I also know my limits and when I am being delusional. I get brave when I'm drunk. And I'm even more of a logical, excuses-making coward when I'm drunker."

Seungkwan continued. "I'm honest to a fault, I can't even stop myself from telling you how much of a mess I am, Vernon. You wouldn't really want to deal with that would you? But I want you to deal with me even after all, but I am warning you that I can be maddening."

"So you're saying whatever we will have is going to end badly? Is that it?"

Seungkwan didn't say anything. 

"Maybe I shouldn't have given you wine."

"It tasted like shit."

"Sorry," Vernon said with a chortle. "But can you please do me a favor, Seungkwan?"

Seungkwan nodded slowly at him. "I'm listening."

"Can we take this one night at a time?" Vernon asked though he was unsure himself of where he was heading. "Let's not think of the end of the world just yet. Let's take it one night at a time."

"What if it's inevitable anyway?" Seungkwan pouted. "Don't we just drag things out?"

Vernon hummed. "All things perish, Seungkwan." It sounded so aged and patronizing even to his ears, but he didn't know how else to stop Seungkwan from thinking so fatalistically.  "We need to enjoy the things as they come and go, even if it's just this night."

"And maybe, this only means you can't predict the future, Seungkwan."

Seungkwan didn't make any protests and neither did he agree. "What's next then? Do we just stay in this room the whole night and wish this night never ends? Coz I don't want this to end."

Vernon shifted his hands away from their hold and brought it up to cup Seungkwan's warm face. "Would you allow me to take you home tonight? You're drunk, and I don't think I can entrust you to anyone else in your state."

"Ok, Vernon. Ok."

I Feel It Coming - The Weeknd

Oxygen, and the rest of the private rooms in at.mosphere shared one common thing: they were all accessible to the owners of La Marquise. At each corner of at.mosphere were two rooms meant for discreet meetings. These eight rooms were connected by a walkway hidden under the glass windows of at.mosphere. These hallways shared a landing which contained the same lift that served the upper floors of La Marquise where the owners (like Vernon), or board directors (like his older neighbours who left the hanok life and chose to view normal people like ants from their glinting tower) resided. 

"Did you need your parking validated?" Vernon asked Seungkwan who was concentrating on the flickering lights of the distant Banpo Bridge.

"Huh?" Seungkwan turned away from the lift's glass walls to face him. "I don't drive."

"How did you get here then?" 

"I took the metro," Seungkwan went back to viewing the scenery. "And from the station, I took a taxi. It's a lot cheaper that way."

Vernon approached and tapped him on the shoulders. "Can you drive?"

Seungkwan faced him. "I can't. I don't have a license. I don't think I really need to?"

"So how do you get around? Metro and taxis?"

"And bus- just how rich are you, Vernon? You sound like you've never been really outside," Seungkwan jeered at him. 

Vernon shrugged just as the lift pinged to announce their arrival to his penthouse suite. He could hear Seungkwan scoff behind him but it soon changed into a gas as the doors of the lift slid open to a dimly lit entryway. Stepping out of the lift and into his house, the whole flat came into soft light. 

Seungkwan took off his shoes without taking his wandering eyes off the apartment. "Woah. I thought only movies have this automatic lighting thing."

Vernon chuckled, he opened the shoe cabinet and swapped his shoes for his slippers and swapped Seungkwan’s for a plastic sealed pair. "It looked nice in films but they're really useful."

"Do they turn on and off when you clap?"

"You could try."

Seungkwan clapped once, when nothing happened, he clapped again though this time it was a stronger clap. Vernon bit on his lip to keep himself from laughing out loud when the younger continued to clap sporadically. After a few more tries, Seungkwan gave up and glared at Vernon. 

"Oh my god, you're such a liar."

Vernon finally stopped holding back. "Well, I didn' t say I had light clappers on. There was no lie."

Seungkwan rolled his eyes at him, but followed into the living room nonetheless. "I think I'm going to overuse my 'Wow's' tonight."

Vernon didn't think there was anything wow-worthy in his living room. It had three, long, modular couches with blankets thrown over it, surrounding a low coffee table that contained his laptop; a giant, multi colored bean bag and a pair of rattan swings near the balcony glass doors. Behind his couches were a wall of vinyl records and of course, his most treasured turntable connected to the house-wide sound system. To the other side wall, just before the stairs to his bedroom, were four rows of bookcases filled with random reads and an occasional collectible or one of Leo's toys. It wasn't topnotch interior designing at all, but it was Vernon's life condensed in 45 sqm.

"Your living room is three quarters of my entire flat," Seungkwan said, dazed at the sheer size of it all.

"Ah, that," Vernon awkwardly started. On the spot, he realised that he never really had anyone over for the past three or four years? It has always been family or friends that visited him, and they all thought he had such a lackluster place that he didn't know what to do with Seungkwan's admiration. So he led him to one of the couches and sat him down instead. He located the tv remote control and turned on the screen. "Make yourself at home, Seungkwan. Do you want anything?"

Seungkwan sank into the couch readily and stared curiously at Vernon. “You’re making me stay the night?”

“You said you didn’t want the night to end?” 

Seungkwan bit his lip, then narrowed his eyes at him, then he opened his mouth but ultimately said nothing.

Vernon forewent the idea of changing into his home clothes and immediately sat down next to Seungkwan. “Did you want to go home? I could call my driver for you. It can’t be safe for you to-” 

“I’m a virgin.”

Vernon was going to put his hand on Seungkwan’s shoulder but it froze midway at what he heard.

“What?”

“I won’t have sex with you,” Seungkwan continued, obviously unfazed by Vernon’s question. “I can’t have sex with you. Do you want to have sex with me?”

Vernon inched just a bit further away from the younger, confused he took his hands back. “I-You should sleep off the alcohol, Seungkwan.”

Seungkwan threw himself on Vernon’s lap. “So you don’t want to have sex with me?” 

Vernon gulped. It wasn’t like he didn’t want to sleep with Seungkwan, in fact, the earlier moments in the Oxygen already had him uncomfortably hard. Had Seungkwan been less inebriated, he would certainly be offering the younger something else. But, Vernon, unlike his peers who seemed to thrive on power and usually dipped too far on the wrong side of propriety, would never take advantage of anyone. Besides, his looks did not require him to force himself on others. 

"Don't is very different from won't."

He shook his head in fond exasperation and hauled Seungkwan up to a sitting position. Making sure that Seungkwan’s eyes were focused on him, he trailed a hand down the flushed face before cradling it softly. His eyes flitted down to the younger’s red lips before moving back up to Seungkwan’s own to ask for permission. 

Seungkwan closed his eyes, long lashes fanning over the pinked cheeks, and licked his lips. 

Vernon took it as permission. He blew a soft puff of hot air on Seungkwan’s mouth before edging closer to nip at the younger’s slicked lips. He bit down gently and Vernon felt the mouth part before he heard him gasp. With his free hand he smoothly guided Seungkwan's palm down his own chest; and he almost broke off the kiss with the way the younger brazenly trailed his nails south. The wondering hands stopped at the buckle but Vernon could feel the tension in the younger’s restraint. So he nudged Seungkwan just a little bit lower to where the answer to his questions lay.

Seungkwan’s hand on him was an open furnace that seemed intent to burn off his resolve. He pushed those thoughts away by grinding himself up towards the other’s grip. The weight on him was steady and sure and for a moment, Vernon thought that Seungkwan must have lied about his experience because this shouldn’t be making him want to lose control so much. He was close to showing just how much he wanted the younger despite everything, but he shot that line down.

With difficulty, Vernon untangled himself from Seungkwan’s fervid mouth and pursuing hand. Seungkwan whined at the loss; the younger was breathing fast and shallow, eyes glassy, and looking far deceivingly sedate but his hands were holding on to Vernon’s belt loops firmly. He gave the younger a kiss on the forehead and swept off imaginary lint on the younger’s suit.

“You’re taking my bed,” Vernon whispered as he ran his hands through the red locks. “I’ll sleep here on the couch, okay?”

Seungkwan whined and vehemently shook his head. “No. I don’t want to. Either you sleep in the same bed with me or I sleep here on the couch.”

“Seungkwan, you’ve got to take the bed.” Vernon patiently repeated. “I wouldn’t ever dream to take advantage of you, but I would rather you wake up tomorrow sure and with a clear conscience.”

Seungkwan pulled away from Vernon. “I’m 26, not a kid! It’s great that you’re so respectful but I would never let you sleep on a couch in your own house! I’ve slept on worse things before.”

Vernon sighed. “Seungkwan…”

“Vernon…,” Seungkwan cheekily returned as the younger pulled on Vernon’s face close. “Do you really think I would allow you to do anything that I wouldn’t want you to do?”

An injection of weariness shot up Vernon’s back, he’s never had someone this convincing and precarious before. “It’s my first time having a guy over.”

“Since forever?” Seungkwan asked, disbelief evident in his voice.

“A few years…”

Seungkwan ahhed. “And did you ever hurt the last guy that was over?”

Unbidden, Jihoon’s face popped up in Vernon’s mind and he had to wonder if that would mean his answer would be a resounding yes. Before he could answer though, Seungkwan has taken his pause as  a “No'' and grabbed his arms to pull him back into the younger’s orbit. 

“So it’s the couch, or sharing the bed with chastity belts on. Your pick, Mr. Vernon.”

Vernon tried to sound miserably and groaned, though he ended up laughing instead. He took Seungkwan’s hands and pulled the man up with him. Walking around the coffee table, he started to lead Seungkwan towards the staircase. “You’ll have to take a shower, and I’ll give you a fresh set of clothes too. It can’t be comfortable to sleep in a suit.”

Seungkwan smirked slyly at him. “Oh Mr. Vernon, you only want me out of my clothes!”

Truly, Vernon didn’t understand how Seungkwan could be both so innocent and so flirty and so dangerous at the same time. He rolled his eyes. “You’re such a roller coaster, Boo Seungkwan.”

Seungkwan grinned at him, eyes turning into little, overturned smiles and teeth showing proudly. The younger didn’t say anything, but Vernon was suddenly reminded of the guy's earlier claim. Maybe there was a kernel of truth to the other’s predictive prowess.

Staring at Seungkwan who kept shooting him satisfied smiles, all Vernon could think of was it’s beginning to look like an ensnarement.

Spider-Hoshi

 

 

Notes:

This is not beta-ed. As you can see, I'm having some sort of trouble trying to weave in the multiple facets of each character...It's difficult to balance the trait of being a three-dimensional character and being a flimsy one. Anyways, I thought this fic would be 20k tops, but I've already filled my notebook with scenes, back stories for the other characters, and histories and futures. And we're gonna be in for a long haul.

Thank you to all those who commented, kudos-ed and recommended this fic.