She should have been better. If she had just been faster, if she had just have gotten there in time, three people wouldn’t have died. She crashed into an alley-way, bringing her knees to her chest, trying to breathe through the crushing ache in her heart. Everything was so loud, she couldn’t focus, she couldn’t breathe. She hadn’t even acknowledged the cut that was slashed across her stomach. The Kryptonite that had lined the blade leaving her unable to heal herself. A warm hand rested on her shoulder. She felt the person slowly kneel next to her, covering her hands with their own, their voice making its way through the chaos.
“It’s okay. I’m here. I’m here, we’re okay.” She leant into the warmth the other person provided, suddenly all too aware of her own shaking.
“Lena.” Her voice came out at a mere whisper.
“I’m here Kara. I’m right here.”
“I couldn’t save them Lee. They died. I couldn’t- I wasn’t fast enough.” A choked sob escaped her as Lena tightened her hold on her.
“You managed to save so many lives here Kara. You saved all those people.” Her hand softly drew patterns on the Kyrptonians back, hoping to help soothe her,
“You can’t always save everyone Skulir gem khap, i zrhueiao shed,” She waited for Kara’s eyes to meet her own “Khap zhao rrip” (Look at me, my beautiful girl, I love you.)
“Khap zhao rrip” They both just sat there for a few moments more, Lena slowly and carefully rocking her back and forth like a mother would do to comfort her child. Kara’s sobs slowly subsided until she was left with a dry mouth and runny nose, her body still trembling.
“Let’s get you to the DEO.” They slowly stumbled their way to the awaiting car, Lena never once letting go of the blonde's hand.
Once they were at the DEO, Kara was instantly guided by Alex towards the infirmary. Yellow sun lamps already set up for her arrival. Alex left a moment later, wanting to give the two some privacy, knowing they had their own routine when it came to hard missions.
Kara was asleep in no time, the stress of the day mixed with the come down of her adrenaline draining her. The silence was filled with the soft hum of machines and the chatter of agents outside the room. Lena’s hand was intertwined with Kara’s while the other softly drew patterns in her hair.
“Oh Darling, whatever will I do with you.” She knew the toll this would take on Kara emotionally, the Kryptonian always wanted to save people so the few times she wasn't able to, crushed her. She always felt so guilty, so responsible despite the protests from those closest to her. Lena didn’t know how long she sat there, just gazing at Kara and how relaxed she looked asleep. How her features finally seemed to rest and her shoulders no longer held the weight of the world and its occupants safety.
She was so distracted, she didn’t notice Alex approach behind her, so when the older Danvers made herself known, the raven jumped. Alex just smiled gently, holding out a bottle of water and a sandwich.
“I figured you hadn’t eaten or drunk anything since earlier.”
“Thank you.” She took them both from the agents hand, sighing.
“Yeah, I’m just worried. We both know how she takes these missions.” Alex rested her hand comfortingly on the Luthors shoulder.
“I know, I also know you’re one of the few people that can make her feel better after these types of missions.”
“Thank you for the food. I’d completely forgotten about it.”
“I figured, but Kara would throw me into the sun if she found out that I wasn’t making sure you were fed and well.” The two chuckled. It was known that Kara cared and worried about her loved ones wellbeing more than she did her own at times. Alex went to leave before Lena’s voice stopped her.
“Alex, thank you.”
“Always, you’re family and family takes care of each other.” The admission made her heart swell. She had truly found her place in the world with the Danvers and their chaotic group of friends.
“Let me know when she wakes,”
They were only there for an hour or so longer before Kara woke. Once Alex had checked to make sure she was healed, they were given the all clear to go home with the order of rest for the next couple of days. The car ride home to Kara’s apartment was spent in silence, Lena’s hand resting on Kara’s thigh to remind her that she was there for her. Kara mostly relied on Lena to guide the way upstairs, thankful for her girlfriend's understanding as she led them both towards the bathroom. The CEO stripped of her own clothes before gently helping Kara out of hers. The warmth of the water hitting Kara’s skin caused her to let out a sigh of relief as she rested her forehead against the wall. The day's events were seriously catching up to her and she didn’t know if she had the energy to move. Lena left a trail of soft kisses over Kara’s shoulders, knowing more than ever of the comfort her girlfriend needed.
“Want me to help you wash?” Kara nodded, not able to find her voice. The CEO gently scrubbed away at the ash and dirt from the day, carefully washing away the dried blood that was left behind from the cut.
Kara’s shoulders started to shake as she tried to hold back her tears.
“Darling, look at me.” Kara slowly faced her, tears rolling down her face.
“Oh i zhao.” (Oh my love.)
Lena softly cupped Kara’s cheeks, wiping away her tears with her thumb.
“Lee-” The CEO rested her forehead against the Kryptonians, the water running down both of their bodies.
“Darling, I am so proud of you, you hear me. You saved so many people today.”
“No buts okay. You tried your hardest, you still fought to protect people even after being stabbed with kryptonite. You’re a hero Kara Zor-El. Never let yourself forget that.” The blonde started to cry harder, falling into her girlfriend's arms.
“You once promised me that you would always be there for me, and you would always protect me, now it’s my turn okay? Let me help you this time.” Kara nodded, her face still buried in the crook of her neck.
Once they were showered and Kara’s tears had stopped, Lena led them towards the bedroom, pajamas already laid out for the both of them. They both cuddled up on the sofa, boxes of Pizza and potstickers waiting for their arrival.
“It might need a bit of reheating.”
“That’s what laser vision is for.”
“Tastes better reheated anyway.” The two laughed quietly. Kara leant into Lena, resting her head on her chest as the raven covered them in a blanket.
“You’re safe here Kara.”
“I’m safe with you. rrip nahn khuhtiv zehdh.” (You are my home.)
They rested on the sofa for a while, eating reheated noonans and watching the Wizard of Oz at Kara’s request. They only made it halfway through before the kryptonian began to fall asleep and Lena had suggested they make their way to bed for the night.
Kara had fallen asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow but Lena lay awake for a little while longer, just admiring the alien next to her. She truly was beautiful. She seemed to radiate goodness and light. Lena softly tucked a stray piece of hair behind the blondes ear. Their life would never be easy, they had already had to overcome so much. From all the assasination attempts on both their lives and Lena’s familys ever looming presence. It was hard to find good in the world. But that's what Kara was, she was the good and the love that Lena needed. She was her home, her anchor when things got tough or she was forced to face the music of having ‘Luthor’ as a last name. The kryptonian was always there, protecting her, defending her, convincing anyone that would listen how different she was than the rest of the Luthors.
Lena smiled at a memory, they had been only dating a few weeks when someone had decided to stand outside Lcorp, megaphone in hand, shouting about how Lena was no different than her family. That soon she would turn into a megalomaniac like Lex and would turn on Supergirl. Kara had heard and Lena had laughed at Kara’s voice, berating him. She had stood in her super suit, arms folded telling him how wrong he was. All before crushing his megaphone and flying up to the balcony to drop off lunch for Lena.
There were so many instances Lena could think back on where the Kryptonian had defended her against all odds, when it had seemed the whole world was ready to pass her off as the next Lex Luthor, Kara was there to shut it down. It hurt, seeing Kara so broken. All she ever strived to do was help, to be a force for good. She soon fell asleep, memories and dreams of the alien by her side filling her mind.
Lena was dragged from her sleep by the sound of a pained whimper. She sat up quickly, trying to regain her senses, noticing Kara starting to fight against the bedsheets that had wrapped around her. She grew increasingly more distressed, more whimpers and cries making their way past her lips. Once she realized what was happening, Lena was alert instantly.
“Kara. Kara you’re having a nightmare.” The CEO softly rested her hand on Kara’s shoulder, hoping to wake her up.
“Lena. No Lena. Please. I can’t lose you.”
The nightmare only seemed to be spiralling. Lena wrapped her arms around Kara, gently whispering Kryptonese.
“rrip nahn voi kahrah, rrip nahn zehdh.” (You are safe Kara, You are home.)
Kara shot up with a sob, her breathing was erratic as she tried to remember where she was.
“Hey, Listen to my voice, you’re home, you’re safe.” She met Lena’s eyes and relaxed slightly, pinching the bridge of her nose as she laid back down.
“I’m sorry for waking you.” Kara whispered into the darkness.
“Don’t apologize darling. Do you want to talk about it.” Kara didn’t say anything for a moment, and Lena didn’t pry. Kara would always tell her in her own time when she was ready.
“It was you.” Lena remained quiet, waiting for her to continue,
“Instead of the people that died today it was you. No matter how fast I tried to get there, you died.” Kara’s voice broke and Lena moved so the blonde’s head was resting comfortably in her lap.
“I held you as you died in my arms.” Lena softly ran her fingers through Kara’s blonde curls.
“I’m right here okay, and i’m not going anywhere.”
“I promise.” Kara slowly fell back asleep to Lena’s loving whispers and the feeling of her hands drawing soothing patterns.
She woke up the next morning to a sticky note on Lena’s pillow. The word breakfast written out in Lena’s handwriting, signed with a small heart and an L. The kryptonian quietly made her way out to the kitchen, wrapping Lena in a hug from behind.
“Goodmorning i zhao.”
“Goodmorning Darling.” Lena leant back into the touch, leaning her head back to kiss the alien.
Kara grinned, spinning her around to kiss her properly. Lena let out a soft moan, kissing her back.
“Well that’s a nice way to wake up.”
The blonde blushed, hiding her face in Lena’s neck.
“How do you feel?”
“I got you Noonan’s breakfast.”
“You’re my favourite.”
“I know.” Kara chuckled, opening up the breakfast.
“This smells amazing.” They both ate in silence, Lena’s hand intertwined with Kara’s free one as she read through her emails.
“What’s your plan for today?” Kara asked, trying not to show her sadness that Lena would have to leave for work.
“Spending time with you. I had Jess push everything back until tomorrow.”
“Of course. You had a rough night, and as the amazing girlfriend I am-” she smirked, laughing,
“I wanted to be here for you. I Thought we could spend the day in comfy clothes, eat food and just have a down day.” Kara smiled, squeezing her hand.
“I love you Lee.”
“I love you too Darling.”