“Yuji.. I can’t. I won’t.”
“You have to. The war is over.”
“War is never over.” my voice edges out harsher than I mean it to. I hate how complacent he looks, and those eyes that show no fear. His naked feet slap against the wooden planks of the floor - each step bounces in this tiny room.
A room I trained him in. Even Megumi in. So many times I had them laid out on their backs, struggling to even keep up with my movements. A room that used to also house memories of Geto. I hate this room.
Yuji is different though. He didn’t have to break my infinity to touch me. Of course, he didn’t, not him. He just walked right through it with a strawberry blush rushing over soft tan cheeks. His fingers just reached through and broke right through me instead. It felt so natural. Everything with him feels so natural.
But not this. Never will this.
Here he is again, his hands pressed against my chest, firm and unyielding with force behind it. I let him have his little victory and fall back against the floor, sitting up and catching him as he just drops in my arms.
Warmth pushes through his clothed back and lingers against my chest. Even with all these layers, his warmth always finds a way to invade me.
I wrap my hands around his waist and hold him tightly against me.
There is already a wetness pooling through his shirt and hoodie. He’s already done it? He never intended to make me do it. So focused on his face I didn’t realize it before.
Reverse technique tingles at the tips of my finger without a second thought -
“Gojo no. Sukuna dies today. With me.”
My hands clutch his sides and I peer down over his face, the grooves under his eyes deepen with each day as if he himself possesses two sets of eyes. Faded black ink growing bolder on his scared skin like the power swelling inside him. His control is slipping.
Tears move over his cheeks, what’s his or mine I can’t tell. Those fingers I wished I could have held at least once, pull down the blindfold from my face.
“So beautiful” he marvels at me with fire leaving his own eyes. He drapes the thick cloth over his eyes and sighs. His hands now clutching mine and my heart finally breaks.
It’s the first time and will be the last time - with touched hands like this.
“Maybe in our next lifetime I will be older or you will be younger. And I hope I will be bolder and kiss you when your eyes linger on me”, his voice bleeds out as everything feels too wet now.
Everything inside me breaks. I’ve never looked past my own desire - greed some would say - until I meet him. And now he's gone with no warmth left in his body, lips no longer smiling and body limp in my arms.
I’ve never felt pain like this.
“Please come back to me.” I sob softly into his hair, trimmers lacing every nerve inside me as I shake. Not even when Toji nearly killed me did I feel pain like this.
I want it to stop. I want Yuji back.
“ Our next lifetime..” it’s all the conviction I need, I don’t need to think. I don’t need this power to loom over others anymore. I don’t need to reshape the sorcerer society anymore. Megumi and Yuta can and will. My remaining students will make it better.