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life is about choices; some we regret and some we are proud of (family is my strength and my weakness)

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life is about choices; some we regret and some we are proud of (family is my strength and my weakness)

By: MadHare

AU: Chaos Crew

Alternatively: 5 times the Chaos Crew made Will regret his job, and the 1 time they didn't

"For there is no friend like a sister in calm or stormy weather; to cheer one on the tedious way, to fetch one if one goes astray, to lift one if one totters down, to strengthen whilst one stands."
~Christina Rossetti

"Life is about choices. Some we regret, some were proud of, and some will haunt us forever. 'Black Rain' was very much about choices. The message - we are what we chose to be."
~Graham Brown

1.) Eating coffee grounds - Jay Halstead

WebMD: You're going to give me heart palpitations but still not what the issue is

ChaoticGood: …

ChaoticGood: Was it me eating coffee grounds?

WebMD: Yes it was you eating coffee grounds, you absolute imbecile

FireBuck: that's kinda valid tho

SWATBoi: done that on a few 24hour shifts

Stabby: been there, done that

HartBreaker: Not condoning it… but I understand

ChaoticNeutral: i mean…

ChaoticGood: I just got a text from Connor asking why Will is screaming into a couch cushion

Will wasn't saying that he hadn't been tired enough not to bother with the coffee maker. That's not at all what he was saying. What he was saying was that if you're tired enough to totally forget to use the coffee maker it's time for you to go home.

Upon texting into the group chat about it, he got very little actual information. When he asks, Jay offers a few different answers. Will can almost feel his heart leap out of his chest when he's told about the minefields. He's so close to wrapping his brother up in bubble wrap and never letting him out of the house, military training be damned. Jay finally gets the correct answer, and so Will rightfully calls him out on it.

Then, of course, comes the fact that the others have, in fact, also eaten coffee grounds. Will sets his phone to the side and picks up the couch cushion to his right. Then, with a brief thought spared to that fact he's at home and doesn't have to hold back, he presses the cushion to his face and screams.

This has the added effect of bringing his surgeon lover running to the room. "Will?" Connor calls, footsteps stopping at the door.

Will's screaming continues, unbothered by the interruption or new audience.

He hears Connor type something into his phone, then come over to the couch and sit down. "Will, you alright?"

Will groans, "I regret going into medicine."

He was ninety percent sure that Connor was smiling when the surgeon replies, "No, you don't."

2.) Mistaking a concussion for  a migraine  - Matt Casey

Will wasn't meant to have his phone out right now, but he didn't have anything pressing to do, and for the moment his patients were taken care of. So, he felt safe enough to check on his idiots for a minute while the hospital was calmer. The first thing he sees is a notification for his name specifically.

Surprisingly, it's from Casey, who doesn't tend to get into that much trouble that often. The medical questions he came to expect since he was a doctor and they were all accident-prone idiots, but he hadn't expected it to get so hard to get said accident-prone idiots to go to the hospital or to get checked out by a medical professional. Matt didn't usually do that; since he was a fire captain and his loving life partner Kelly Severide bugged him to go get checked out. However, Will was fully aware of the fact that Kelly was teaching classes in Indiana right now, and therefore because Matt had little self-preservation skills when it came to himself as he didn't want to bother anyone, it was highly probable that Matt had gotten himself into something he couldn't handle alone.

This probably meant that the pain had been going on for a while.

I've had this migraine for like two days and they don't usually last this long. I have a shift tomorrow, reads the message.

Will raises an eyebrow, asking the younger what he's been doing when this headache had come on. Matt's response was that he'd woken up with a migraine. Will asked what he'd done beforehand, Matt replied that he'd been on shift. Will raises an eyebrow, waiting, then sighs as another text comes through informing Will that Matt had cracked his head on the concrete after a victim had tackled him because the new probie had lost his hold on him in the struggle.

Will jumps up like he's been burned, startling Reese as he moves past her with a quick, "Excuse me." He rushes to an unused exam room and calls Matt.

"Hello?" Matt asks, sounding startled.

"Please, for the love of God, come to Med so I can check you out," Will says in way of greeting.

"It's not that bad, it's just a migraine," Matt protests.

Will wants to start crying. These idiots will be the death of him, he knows it. "Matt, you don't have Kelly there to look after you right now and I can feel the echoes of pain you're trying to hide from the chaos bond. Just come to Med and let me make sure you're okay. Please," Will begs.

When Matt did break down and come in, Will found that Matt had been concussed and told him to take the next shift off just to be safe. When Matt protests, Will puts his foot down and threatens to tell Kelly. Matt, who lives in a state of anxiety over disappointing Kelly, pouts as Will wraps up the examination and sends him back home with a note for Boden.

"Thanks, Will," Matt says as he grabs his jacket and heads back home. Will can't help but think it's good that some of them are grateful for his help.

When Will tells Connor about it later that night over coffee in the break room, Connor smiles and replies, "At least this idiot lives in Chicago instead of LA."

3.) Stabbed in the arm at home - Marty Deeks

Will had been taking a nap in the break room when his phone pinging had woken him. He checks it and sees a message from Marty asking how much blood one can lose before passing out. Will's immediate response was for Deeks to go to the emergency room.

It's not that bad, just a stab to the arm, Deeks replies.

This doesn't make Will feel any better. In fact, it ratchets up the worry. Will's heart gives a few sharp thumps and if he didn't know any better, he'd almost say every beat whispered, 'panic, panic, panic'. He can't count how many times he's begged for Jay to let him check out a wound or suspected injury, now adding the Chaos Crew into the mix and Will knows he's scaring quite a few of his coworkers with how stressed and snappish he is every time one of the Chaos Crew is hurt.

It's literally just a cut, though, Deeks says.

Will demands a picture because if Deeks isn't going to the hospital, then Will will bring the hospital to him. The 'cut' ends up being a hole in his arm because Deeks managed to stab himself with a fire poker somehow and Will wants to start screaming. When Connor wonders in, Will is still sitting on the couch staring at the picture he'd been sent.

"Which one this time?" Connor asks, forgetting about the jacket he'd come in here to grab in favor of sitting next to Will.

Will hands over his phone in response.

Connor hums. "Won't go to a hospital?"

Will shakes his head.

Connor hands back the phone and brushes his hand over the mark tattooed into Will's shoulder. Warmth blooms through Will's body, radiating from the mark. Will sighs and finally relaxes again. Connor smiles, kissing Will's cheek, "You'll get him there. You always do."

Will hums, "Eventually." He kisses Connor soundly, then watches as Connor leaves with a coffee cup to answer his pager. He sighs, then grabs his phone and gives Deeks instructions on how to properly clean and bandage to wound. He makes Deeks send a picture of the bandage to prove it was taken care of and the sighs. He regrets being a doctor, really he does.

4.) Untreated knife wound - Nick Torres

"Don't answer it," Connor whispers against Will's lips, trying to keep him in the present.

Will complies, attaching his mouth to Connor's neck. The phone dings again and Connor groans, collapsing back against the wall with a sigh. Will kisses him apologetically as he pulls his phone from the pocket of his scrubs. When he sees the message he sighs. Pressing his forehead to Connor's, he whispers, "I'm sorry."

Connor hums, "Shouldn't be trying this at work anyway."

Will smiles, "See you at break?"

Connor nods, "I'll bring coffee." Then he's gone, disappearing as fast as he appeared with a kiss on Will's cheek.

Will sighs, then answers the phone. As he reads the message, he cusses them out mentally for interrupting his moment with Connor. Nick Torres is another one of the few people Will doesn't often have to worry about. Between Jimmy, the ME that Nick was dating, and Gibbs, the leader of the team, Nick was pretty covered in the medical area. Can I just leave a knife wound?

What happened? Will sent back.

I was trying to make dinner for Jimmy and Tony, but the knife slipped and I cut my arm.

Will sighs, setting his head in his hands. He decides against typing and just calls Torres instead.

"I'd say I didn't expect this, but I think we both know that I'd be lying," Torres says. The phone clunks against what Will assumes to be the counter.

"Are you keeping pressure on the wound?" Will asks.

"Yeah," the agent replies, "Bleeding's slowing down now."

"How big is it?"

"Diagonal from wrist to mid-forearm."

"You're going to need stitches."

He hears the whine and petulant pout when Torres replies, "Can't I just have Jimmy stitch it?"

"If he's home, sure, but something tells me he isn't." Will starts pacing the small hallway. "You need to get to the ER."

"Why can't I just wait for Jimmy?"

Will hisses, "Because you can't let a knife wound fester, you idiot!" He suddenly turns and comes face to face with a nurse, Amanda Gibbons.

She stares at him, then hands him a chart, "Dr. Manning wants you downstairs for a consult."

Will nods, "Be there in a second." The nurse leaves and Will goes back to the phone, face burning bright just as red as his hair.

5.) Rebar through the chest - Chris LaSalle

Will sees it the moment Dr. Charles starts coming towards him and he knows exactly what the man wants to do.

"Dr. Charles," Will says as the man comes over.

The therapist sighs, "I've come to request your phone. It seems to be making you stressed at work and I'm afraid it will begin to affect your ability to effectively treat patients."

Will could almost hear Connor laughing from across the ED, could almost hear April, Maggie, and Sarah too. However, instead of saying a word about it, he pulls out his phone and scrolls to his most recent mention before he pushes the phone across the desk to the psychiatric doctor. Looking up at Dr. Charles, Will recites the entire chat from memory.

"Sunday, March twenty-second at 0726 in the morning Chris LaSalle messages me with the question, 'How many useful organs are in your chest? On an unrelated note, how likely is a piece of rebar to hit vital organs in your chest?' My response at 0727 was immediately, 'please, for the love of God, just go to the hospital'. He protested heavily, 'it's not like it hit anything important, Sebastian was hurt far worse than I was, he's the one with the bullet holes, I've just got a piece of rebar sticking out my chest'."

Dr. Charles raises an eyebrow but doesn't comment.

Will continues, "He goes on to say, 'If it gets worse I'll go to the ER', but as every doctor and nurse in here knows, you can't exactly wait with a piece of rebar sticking out of your chest, so I continued trying to convince him to go to the hospital. He told me now more times than I care to admit before I finally convinced him to go to the hospital by reminding him that if that rebar happens to shift and hit somewhere important like a lung or his heart, he may very well be dead by the time someone can get to him. He went not because he thought it was best, but because it would tear up Sebastian and King if he died when they could have stopped it."

"What does this mean?" Dr. Charles asks specifically.

"I'm not an idiot, he would eventually figure it out himself. I'm just the one that deals with the fallout because a member of my familial bond decided to be stupid and not go to a hospital. I have no delusions, they're all idiots, but they're my idiots and I love them."

Dr. Charles nods, "I see." Then he gently pushes the phone back to Will and smiles, "My apologies Dr. Halstead. I'll leave you to your work."

Will nods, then turns back to his charts, pocketing his phone again. He tells himself he's not upset all the way up until Natalie comes closer and gently informs him that his ears are burning red.

+1.) Shot in the vest - Will Halstead

FireBuck:  alright guys that felt like two shots to the vest @ChaoticNeutral @ChaoticGood @Virginia @GIJoe @HartBreaker @SWATBoi who got shot

Connor hears the dinging from Will's phone, but he can't bring himself to answer it. The pain he'd felt was still too raw, worry and fear war for attention as he paces around the small hallway he was in. His mind brings up the images he'd seen without his permission. He flinches, hearing phantom gunshots echo in his ear. Tears come to his eyes as he suddenly turns and hits the wall. He sobs as he turns and leans his back against the wall. The tears spill down his cheeks as he slides down the wall.

Will had gone out to an active scene trying to save a man because he'd been there. He'd taken two shots and dropped like a stone to the ground. Connor remembers the way he'd shouted, throat still raw and painful, and tried to get to his Soulmate. He remembers the way the police had held him back, one hand on his shoulder, the other around his waist.

The officer, Adam Ruzek, belonged to Connor's familial bond, which was the only thing that saved him from getting hit when the arm looped around his stomach. Connor remembers the soft reassurances in his ears, but mostly he remembers the screaming. He'd called for Will so many times.

"Baby?" asks a familiar voice.

Connor doesn't look up. He can hardly see through his tears and he knows somewhere that he's sobbing. Warm arms gently wind their way around him and he scrabbles for a hand-hold on the arms, gripping fabric tightly and burying his face to hide from the rest of the world.

"It's okay. It's okay," whispers the voice.

"You got shot," Connor gasps, "How it that o- how is that okay?"

"It didn't hit me, it hit my vest. I'm alright, baby, I'm alright."

Connor looks up, catches a glimpse of red hair, and sniffles. "You still got put into harm's way. I can't-" he swallows, tries to clear his throat, "I can't lose you, Will."

"You didn't. I'm right here," Will promises.

Connor nods, "I know."

Will grins, "Good. Come on, let's get home, hmm?"

Connor nods. Then he stands, Will's arms still wrapped around him. He smiles at his Soulmate, letting the warmth seep back into his bones.

They make it outside where Will stops suddenly and grins. Matt and Jay stand outside, both waiting patiently with Kelly and Mouse stood off to the side. Both light up when they see Will, coming forward with smiles. Connor lets go of Will for the moment and backs away to let Matt and Jay have their time with Will. He knows the phone's been lighting up with messages, knows it's the rest of the CC. He watches his lover with a smile.

Will converses with his brother and Matt with ease, calming fears and soothing worries as easily as breathing. He asks himself how he could ever regret going into medicine when it gives him the ability to help his idiots. With a grin, he lets them go, citing tiredness as a reason. As Matt and Jay leave with Kelly and Mouse, Connor comes back over and wraps his arms around Will's torso. Will smiles and wraps an arm around Connor's shoulders.

"Going into medicine was the best decision of my life," he says to Connor.

Connor smiles, laying his head on Will's shoulder, "I know."