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┬┴┤(・_├┬┴ Big Red Riding Hood

Today 10:27 AM
Red X: Hello, and welcome to the BTS! Our service is reliable, discreet, and best of all, free!

Red Hood: The hell is this?

Red X: The Bat Texting Service you never knew you needed.

Red Hood: When did you put the phone on my pillow?

Red X: When you were sleeping.

Red Hood: I could have shot you!

Red X: But you didn’t.

Red X: Your sleeping face is now the bg of my phone.

Red Hood: You are as creepy as your old man. Boundaries, stalker.

Red Hood: Does B know about this?

Red X: Not yet. I’ll tell him in a minute.

Red X: Btw

Red X: It’s good that you use proper prenounciation.

Red X: Wasn’t sure if you could.

Red Hood: It is pronunciation. And the hell do you mean by that?

Red X: If ciurse yiusd be the grammmer naszi

Red Hood: Now you’re just trying to piss me off.

Red X: Isd itg werking?

Red Hood: You’ll know in a minute.

Red X: Please don’t break down my door.


( /¯ °3° )/¯ B-Man

Today 10:45 AM
Red X: Yo, welcome to BTS. Glad to have you aboard, B.

Red X: Almost like you live in the modern age!

Batman: Is this device secure.

Red X: As secure as the mind-wiped assassin AI overseeing it could be.

Today 10:47 AM
Red X: B?

Today 10:49 AM
Red X: I think I messed up.


ヽ(ill゚д゚)ノ All Seeing One

Today 12:20 PM
Oracle: So not only is this network piggybacking off of the Justice League’s lines

Oracle: But you also have an ai watching over it in case they become compromised

Red X: Yeah, but the AI is locked out of the JS. It can’t do more than attach bytes onto the signals and use that to carry the messages via sattelate.

Oracle: I’ll need to take a look to make sure it’s all on the upside

Oracle: But I don’t see a reason to shut down the BTS

Red X: That’s good to hear

Red X: Considering I’ve already given everyone a phone.

Oracle: Who is everyone

Red X: The Bats + the Teen Titans.

Red X: Mayyybe Deathstroke.

Oracle: I’m not telling Batman for you


(˶′◡‵˶) Clone Boy

Today 1:04 PM
Superboy: Repeat that

Red X: ...I used the murder bot head to create an AI to moderate a superhero texting service?

Superboy: Does Ravager know?

Red X: I'm not crazy despite popular belief.

Red X: She doesn't even know BTS is a thing.

Superboy: Why not?

Red X: Like I would give her another way to contact me.

Superboy: Fair enough

Superboy: So

Superboy: The little face at the top is the AI.

Red X: The AI monitors who's operating the phone. It can tell if they're an impostor or if they're being forced to use it against their will.

Red X: It can even tell the difference between jokes and when to send an ambulance.

Red X: Oddly enough I can't get it to do more than emote in the chat.

Superboy: Whats its name?

Red X: Haven't thought of one yet.

Superboy: Call it Superboi

Red X: Your'e terrible.

Red X: How about Red XYZ?

Superboy: Now whos the terrible one

Superboy: Klark Cent

Red X: Wuce Brayne

Superboy: Lois Lane

Superboy: Wait


_(:3 」∠)_ 7 Wonders Girl

Today 4:18 PM
Wonder Girl: Impulse is sad that he’s locked out of the chat

Red X: When he stops spamming me he can get his phone previliges back.

Wonder Girl: What did you think would happen when you gave him the ability to send pics

Red X: He's the reason we can't have nice things.

Red X: I still have pics and emotes on lock down until the trauma goes away.

Wonder Girl: No one liked your custom emotes anyway

Red X: Gasp. You take that back!

Wonder Girl: The features are basic and there's a lack of customization

Wonder Girl: You also have the text bubbles on the wrong side of the screen

Red X: You make a super secure chat service that not even aliens can hack then.

Red X: And I'm still working on the user interface. Thank you.

Wonder Girl: You're welcome.


(𓌻‸𓌻) Old Man

Today 7:30 PM
Deathstroke: I see you haven't learned your lesson about working with artificial intelligence.

Red X: Batboogey won't betray me.

Today 7:38 PM
Red X: That's the AI's name btw.

Today 7:41 PM
Red X: Unless you have a better name in mind.

Deathstroke: Kaiser.

Red X: ...damn that's good.


U・ᴥ・U Bat Butler

Today 8:26 PM
Agent A: I have left your lunchboxes on top of the computer in attempt to keep Bat-Hound from eating them again.

Red X: Good to see the phone isn't giving you trouble, A.

Red X: I'll come by before leaving for work.

Agent A: I should warn you that I have attached even more monitors to ensure you consume what I have made.

Red X: Urgh

Agent A: Indeed. Do not give your food away to the first person who will take it again. I will know.

Red X: Yes, sir.


ಠ_ಠ B-Man

Today 8:32 PM
Red X: Agent A is scary.

Batman: Of course he is. He's the best agent we have.

Batman: Even I can't go against him. I can't save you if you decide to skip your meals.

Batman: Nor would I want to.

Red X: Thanks for having my back, B.

Batman: I always do.

Red X: I was being sarcastic.

Batman: I wasn't.


(¬‿¬) Big Red Riding Hood

Today 11:57 PM
Red Hood: Nightwing tried to grab the phone and got shocked into oblivion.

Red Hood: Is that supposed to happen?

Red X: Sounds like Kaiser's security system is working just fine.

Red X: Tell him to walk it off.

Red Hood: He's going to be a vicious dick about not getting his own phone. You know that, right?

Red X: He'll get a phone when he stops trying to take me to jail.

Red Hood: He only does that because you make his life a living hell.

Red Hood: I mean it's funny, but that whole step-mom thing would drive anyone over the edge.

Red X: It's not my fault Nightwing misunderstood B giving me that diamond ring.

Red X: Nor is it my fault that A or B won't correct his misunderstanding.

Red Hood: Just hurry up and get him his own phone so he'll stop bugging me about it.

Red Hood: You can kiddie-fy it or make it say Nightwing sucks or something if it'll make you feel better.

Red X: You have given me An Idea.

Red X: I knew you were my favorite Robin for a reason.

Red Hood: It's not much of a compliment when the only other Robin is on your shit list.

Red X: You have the best thighs in Gotham?

Red Hood: God you are such a creep.

Red Hood: But hell yeah I do.


━(((;゚Д゚)))━!!! She Who Must Not Be Named

Today 1:21 AM
Ravager: Hey Ein

Ravager: Heard something very interesting about your fancy new phones

Today 1:23 AM
Ravager: You have 30 sec to convince me not to kill you

Red X: I WILL STEAL A TRUCK OF GUM FOR YOU IF YOU LET ME LIVE

Today 1:25 AM
Red X: I'll have it delivered by tomorrow night!!!

Ravager: Fine. Now what is this about using the ai from the murder bot

Red X: It's not your uncle.

Red X: I scrubbed the copied info off which left me with a pure innocent as a newborn baby AI.

Red X: Don't be a baby killer R.

Ravager: If I find this thing doing anything outside its programming

Ravager: My blade is going through each and every piece of technology you own

Red X: Duly noted.

Red X: I will warn you that it's learning things like when to autocorrect spulling errors.

Ravager: Well I see it's as dumb as you

Red X: Newborn Baby, R.

Red X: Wait a minute.

Red X: I never made a phone for you.

Red X: ...how...?

Ravager: Do you really want me to answer that

Today 1:34 AM
Ravager: That's what I thought