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Nonlinear Revelation

Summary:

A sequel to Moeka's Linear Bounded Phenogram story, The Quantum Awakening.

Notes:

This is my first fanfiction and I know it has some issues, this isn't fully finished and I will iron everything out. The gay stuff will come later but its sad for the first few chapters.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Quantum Reverberance

Chapter Text

The world is dark. I can’t see a thing. My vision went black after I used the last of my strength to give Kurisu and Mayuri my phone, having written a D-Mail in order to fix this. A D-mail to FB years in the past telling him I won’t become a rounder. I knew this D-Mail would certainly lead to me, well, no longer being around. Me being absent would allow Okabe to keep the IBN 5100, it would undo my actions. I let myself go.

The world remained dark, unfeeling and quiet. A moment went by feeling like an eternity when suddenly I felt my sense of hearing come back to me.


“Moeka-san, wake up!” I hear a voice calling to me. It’s Kurisu’s, I’d recognize her voice anywhere. She’s telling me to wake up? I wonder why I can still hear her voice.


“Wake up, sleepy head!” That voice was definitely Mayuri. Her enthusiasm in everything she says is unmistakable. I didn’t understand why I could hear their voices until it finally clicked. I must have finally reached another-

heaven.

 

I open my eyes expecting to see something grand, but instead I see myself laying on the couch of the lab. I feel Mayuri’s giant Upa plush up against the back of my head. I’m wearing some sort of apron? It’s green and says something about CRTs from what I can see. I turn my head to see Mayuri and Kurisu sitting on the floor next to me. Okabe is off in the corner drinking a Dr. Pepper.

“She’s awake!” Mayuri yells, startling me a little bit. Her joy is unreal but completely her.


“I can see that Mayuri, I’m not blind.” Kurisu says, “Moeka, I’m glad you’re awake, you’ve been asleep for 6 hours now.” 6 hours? They saw me fall asleep? The last thing they should have seen of me was me bleeding out on the floor. I thought I would be in some sort of heaven but this feels so real. I could reach out and touch their faces and it wouldn’t feel anything out of the ordinary.


“Mayushii missed you Moeka!!” Mayuri pouts a little bit, “Mayushii was also worried, you don’t usually sleep this long!”


“She’s probably just a bit extra tired from working overtime at the CRT shop. There’s barely any customers except for yesterday. Felt like the whole damn town wanted a CRT.” Okabe chimes in from the corner. He’s looking at some gadget in his little workshop section of the lab. What’s this about me working overtime at a CRT shop? I know I’ve never worked there before in my life. This all feels too strange to be some heaven.


I turn my head to look directly at Mayuri, her smile is infectious. She’s truly happy to see me awake. I can feel my eyes start to water before a streak of liquid goes down my cheek. I don’t deserve to see her so happy, not after what I did. It doesn’t make sense. Mayuri’s expression changes to a look of confusion and worry as I start crying harder.


“Moeka? What’s wrong? Did Mayushii say something wrong?” She’s so worried about me, like she’s really my friend.


“Moeka what’s going on? Is everything alright?” Kurisu says as she moves closer to me. She says this with the same worry Mayuri has, she’s genuinely worried about me of all people. I shift my body on the couch to be a bit more sideways as I grab Mayuri and pull her in to my arms, my head resting in her chest, my tears soaking her dress. Mayuri was surprised but immediately held me back. She was always astute with what to do in an emotional experience. Kurisu was taken aback but moved in to get in the hug as well. These two girls, my friends, hugged me so tightly. I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve this at all.


“Mayuri, Kurisu,, I’m so sorry.” I say through my tears. “So much happened, I did a lot of bad things, I almost kill-” I stopped my sobbing becoming even louder. Okabe sharply and suddenly turned his gaze towards me. I couldn’t see it but I heard him get out of his chair to look at me. “I almost killed you Mayuri, I was so close to pulling the trigger before I stopped myself. I’m so sorry.” Mayuri and Kurisu were both insanely confused, believing me to just be talking about a bad dream. Okabe was shocked at what I was saying, I heard him drop his Dr Pepper to the floor, luckily he had put the lid back on before he stood up.


“You *almost* killed Mayuri?” Okabe was shaking with his words. He seemed far more confused than the hugging me. He regained his composure somewhat before asking me, “Moeka, I need to talk to you on the roof as soon as possible. Girls make sure she’s okay and send her up to me.” He walked out the door, presumably up to the roof. The door shutting behind his lab coat.

I was silent as the two girls hugged me, a crying mess on the lab’s only couch.

Chapter 2

Notes:

cw// mentions of suicide

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Kurisu was the first to speak, “What’s he on about? It was just a bad dream, right Moeka?”

I said nothing in response. Kurisu knew something was going on after that, she was insanely smart. She stood up from me and turned to Mayuri,

“Mayuri we need to let her get up.”

“But Mayushii doesn’t want to let her go! She’s clearly upset and we need to help her!” Mayuri was intent on holding me. I got even more emotional but tried to keep it down and stop myself from crying any more.

“It’s okay Mayuri, let me get up.” Mayuri was hesitant but she let me get myself up after that. I stood between Kurisu and Mayuri, who was still sitting on the floor. My outfit was soaked and my face was a complete disaster. I wiped my tears and held both of them in a soft embrace. I didn’t deserve them, but I didn’t want to make them any more upset.

I grabbed my phone from the table and began to walk outside. Mayuri was still on the floor, confused and sad. Kurisu I assume knew what was going on, at least to an extent. I left the lab and was met with the setting sun outside the lab stairs. It was a beautiful evening in Akihabara.

I walked up all the stairs to the roof of the building. I saw Okabe standing near the guard railing, looking down at the city. The city was still bustling with people even at this hour. Akihabara truly was special. I walked up to the side of Okabe, leaning myself over the railing too. Being this high up filled me with images of that night. The night FB first contacted me. The night I was ready to end it all.

“Shining Finger,” Okabe turned to talk to me, he used the name he had been calling me when I was a lab member. A goofy nickname based on how I always talk using email. “Sorry, Moeka,” He was shaken up, I could at least tell that. He wasn’t Hououin Kyouma right now, he was just Okabe Rintaro. “What is the last thing you remember?” He asks me quietly, and I feel scared to tell him.

I shake a bit before deciding I need to be honest, even if it makes him hate me. “I, I was raiding the lab with Sern’s rounders,” Okabe winces a little bit, “they arrived and I had to do my mission. I held you all at gunpoint,” he gets a little more shaken, “but I couldn’t shoot.” Okabe is shocked at what I said, it must be terrible to learn your friend tried to kill you. “You all talked me down, I was crying. I didn’t want to do this. You were all my closest friends in the world, my only friends. Mayuri and Kurisu, they told me to trust them.” I was going to cry again, but stopped myself before I could.

“Another Rounder tried to shoot Mayuri himself, but I jumped in the way of the bullets. Suzuha took them down and rushed to my dying body with the rest of the lab members. I gave you my phone with a D-Mail to FB years in the past telling her I won’t become a Rounder. I knew that would stop me from being around to steal the IBN 5100.” I trailed off and got even more emotional. I knew that D-Mail would cause me to kill myself in the past. I was so close to doing so back then. I was so alone.

Okabe turned and held me in his long arms. He put his hands around my back and held me close. “It’s okay Moeka, that’s all in the past now. This is the perfect timeline, you don’t have to kill any of us.” I was shocked, what was he talking about? The perfect timeline? “I have no idea how you ended up here in this timeline, my version of events was different to say the least.” I look at him in silence, he looks back, his face filled with despair from thinking.

“In my version you killed her without a second thought.”

I felt like I was going to throw up. That can’t be true, I thought to myself. Mayuri was alive and well now, how could I have killed her? How was I alive? Okabe looked at me, sensing my shock and pain. “This is the Steins Gate. It’s a worldline where you never killed Mayuri. Where she lives. Where everyone lives.” I didn’t understand what he meant. I was never very well versed on worldlines.

“As for FB, I have no evidence you even work for him, well as a Rounder anyways. It’s highly probable you aren’t one in this timeline.” “him? FB is a woman.” I was confused, FB always said she was a mother to me. “A lie, FB is really Yugo Tennouji, or Mr Braun as I usually call him. He’s the man who owns the CRT shop under the lab. The one you work at.” He points at my apron. I look down and realize what the “CRT” meant, it’s a uniform.

I pulled out my phone, I had messages on there from everyone in the lab. Mainly messages from Mayuri and Kurisu. I saw it there, my messages from FB. I open them, and in them is nothing that I could have ever expected. The messages are all about when I'm going to be working, and pictures of his daughter. I scroll up and up until I reach the first message.

“Hey, I know you’re going through a rough time Moeka, but my daughter just told me how much she likes spending time with you. You’ve been a great sitter for her, and I’m eternally thankful for that.”

I fall to the floor of the roof, reading that message over and over in my head. The next few messages were me telling him how bad things were, and him being rather fatherly in telling me it was going to be okay. He offered me a job at his CRT shop just so he could look after me and make sure I was okay. I must have gotten down from that roof to talk to him, he saved my life. Okabe stands and looks at me for a bit. I was so close to crying at that moment I'm surprised I didn’t.

I turned my head to look up at him, “I’m sorry for,” The words won’t come out of my mouth. “It’s okay,” Okabe interrupts me, “That wasn’t you, it was another Kiryuu Moeka. You didn’t do anything wrong. From what I gather you saved her in your timeline.” He was right, I didn’t kill Mayuri, I sacrificed my life just to save hers.

I take one last look at the messages from FB on my phone, and turn it off.

Notes:

I had this chapter like 99% complete already so I finished it off to upload. I'll keep working on more chapters soon :)

Notes:

I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Like I said this is a very early draft and a WIP. I will be smoothing this out and most likely reformatting it to be more like a fanfic and less like a book. I wrote this at like 12 am while dead tired lmao.