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The Misadventures of Slitherfuck and Metalface

Summary:

To Cobra, "probation" was perhaps the most grating word he'd ever heard. To Gajeel, it was just another job with an aggravating teammate. Dragons are territorial and tend to be combative - but when other dragon instincts get in the way, being argumentative is the least confusing thing about their new partnership.

Notes:

The first 9 chapters of this fanfic are co-authored by two people: Zephiraz (Jeely on FF.net) and LilyKotsu. The events in this story began in roleplay, and then evolved into something much more. Chapter 10 onwards is one author, Lily.

Please note that mentions of alpha/beta/sub/etc. in this fic do not mean the same as in ABO genre. In this fic they apply to dragon-social hierarchy stuff.


Winner of Best Drama Fiction award for The Guild Awards 2022 T2 season!



Transformative Works policy: Please feel free to podfic, translate, or create fanart related to this fic! (As long as it's NOT on Wattpad.) All I ask is that you send me a link (or on AO3, list it as a related work) so that I can link back to it.

Chapter 1: Ouroboros Begins

Notes:

Credit to Rhapshie for the image below! It was commissioned by the former co-author (Zeph) and has been posted (and edited) here with their permission.

Chapter Text

 

"... Dragons, while mostly solitary creatures, can congregate in what is called a ‘flight’. Similar to a wolf pack or lion pride, there is always a clear alpha; usually male, though alpha females are not unheard of. The alpha's rule over the less dominant dragons in his flight is absolute, unless he is dethroned by a challenger..." ~ Dragon Historia, pg 12

 

Chapter One: Ouroboros Begins

Dank, dark, and altogether miserable; not words one would want to describe an unpaid job, but Gajeel found himself stumbling into them far too often. This time they accompanied a mission given to him by the Master in secret. As the Master's grandson had recently been expelled from Fairy Tail it fell to Gajeel to track Laxus and ensure the boy had come to no harm nor been discovered by certain darks guilds out for his life, and Gajeel was none too pleased. He couldn't refuse a direct order, however, so the Iron Dragonslayer set off for misadventures untold.

It was easy enough for a seasoned Dragonslayer to track Laxus down. The scent of fresh air after a storm and cloying cologne drew Gajeel to the outskirts of an old graveyard overrun by moss and ivy, the myriad branches of late-blooming trees meshing together to form a flowering wall above the rotting remains of wooden fencing.

Another smell - that of blood, leather, and battle - mingled with that of the Thunder God, fighting to make itself known above Laxus' stench. Gajeel kept to the moss to muffle his steps and stayed well downwind of his quarry; but as he drew closer to the heavy scent that was undoubtedly Laxus, he noted the unfamiliar scent was closer than he had originally thought.

"I doubt he'll kick up too much of a hassle," Laxus said, leaning against one of the larger mossy graves. He folded his thick arms over his chest, then waved one of his hands for emphasis. "Old man loves a good redemption story. He won't turn away somebody who's injured, either. Not saying I'm playing his chords, but... just saying it works in your favor." There was a thoughtful pause, and the sound of a rustling cloak.

The sounds returned to the eerie quietness of the old graveyard. Any further movement to see lead to only one sight: Laxus, dressed in common clothes and a traveller's cloak, leaning against a crumbling grave while the air about him seemed to be stained with an overwhelming smugness.

The scent of blood had moved closer, however. Almost like it was right behind Gajeel...

"What are you doing here, low breed?" came a gravelly and sneering voice, just before a foot kicked the back of the iron dragon's head.

Bright spots erupted in Gajeel's eyes and he stumbled out of cover, but he quickly caught himself and swung around into a defensive stance as instinct took hold, metallic scales growing along his raised forearms.

Before him stood an unfamiliar face. Dark red hair, tan skin, stupid slanty eyes. Fucker was injured, his right arm in a bloody sling that he tried to hide under his own traveller's cloak. He was very thin and wasn't very big, he was just about Salamander's height - which seemed almost dwarfed in comparison to the Thunder God over yonder.

Most importantly the stranger wasn't pressing the attack further, and he certainly didn't smell like anyone from Raven Tail.

"I oughtta be asking you that same thing, ya dirty fuck," Gajeel retorted. "What, you trying to drag Laxus to the dark side?" But even as he asked, Gajeel knew it wasn't true. A dark guild wouldn't employ such a shabby recruiter, nor send someone already injured into a possible fight. Then again, most dark mages he knew were complete dicks.

The stranger's posture didn't change, a stance that, even with a bum arm, seemed to be eerily confident. He looked at Gajeel's scales, but seemed completely unphased by their presence. "Your Master sent you to spy on Laxus." He gave a tired smirk, then looked to Laxus. "So this is the idiot you were talking about," he commented, moving past Gajeel with silent steps.

"Figures," Laxus grunted, stepping away from his grave. "Might as well invite him to the party, then, eh?" His guest didn't seem all too pleased with the proposal, but Laxus was already hatching an idea. "I don't need some recycled waste of space tailing me everywhere I go, but maybe you can make yourself useful. I've got a job for you, trash, and I'll even pay you for it, unlike that old man of mine."

Gajeel bristled under the rash of insults, but here Laxus was willing to provide something he sorely needed; rent money. Pride could wait, Gajeel decided as he begrudgingly followed the redheaded weirdo into the mossy clearing.

"So you've knocked some sense into that thick skull of yours, have you?" Laxus smirked when he received no response. "Good. Now, listen closely. You're going back to Fairy Tail, you're gonna get the Master, and bring him here. Understand?"

"Yeah, yeah, I got it," Gajeel responded gruffly. "Now how much you payin' for this shit?"

Laxus' smirk grew into a full-blown smug caricature as he stepped forward and pinned a letter to the front of Gajeel's tunic. "I'm paying you by not killing you," Laxus growled, warning sparks skittering across his arms. Where they strayed too close, the errant electricity arced onto Gajeel and burned his skin. "Got it?"

"Y-Yeah..." He should fight. He knew he should fight. But the excruciating memory of taking the full brunt of Laxus' fury so Natsu could survive was still fresh in his mind. He had no choice but to comply.

All the while the stranger had climbed up on one of the larger graves and made himself content in the soft moss and princess pine that covered it. His narrow eyes keenly watching the situation, he then turned his violet glance away and smirked at Laxus' form of payment. "Impressive, a First Gen that knows how to take orders," the redhead commented, leaning back on his one good arm. "I can hear how well you've trained him." 'Like a dog' the stranger's tone seemed to imply, though the words weren't said.

Gajeel had to look away to keep from glaring literal daggers. He had made a promise to the old man that he'd bring him news of the brat without causing a commotion. He would have to let this one go. That didn't mean he couldn't think about beating them both to a bloody pulp, which he did with gusto as he turned and skulked from the graveyard. Neither would have a bone left in their body by the time he made it back to the guild.


 

Fairy Tail was as lively as ever, noise and rowdy energy radiating out of every mage present in the large guild hall. So much so, that no one seemed to pay any attention to the black-haired man that came stalking in through the front doors; a man with a scowl that could have drilled through skulls.

It was with some misfortune that he almost tripped over the smiling shillelagh that suddenly stuck out from behind one of the great pillars. The short, elderly man who emerged soon after was at no loss for his own aged smile, looking up at Gajeel with a warm expectation. "I can only guess from that look on your face that you came across my grandson out there," Master Makarov commented. His voice held with it a promise that it would be fine if the iron dragon hadn't.

"I found your brat alright," Gajeel said with some distaste. "I got found out; he had some freak with him, and now he seems to think I'm the official Dreyar errand boy. He wanted you to have this." He withdrew a heavily crumpled envelope from a deep pocket it and shoved it in front of the Master. The envelope was plain, aside from a single etched lightning bolt on the front; an enchantment that would no doubt zap whoever opened it were they not the intended recipient.

Makarov took the envelope and withdrew a letter, reading in silence. His kindly smile morphed into a mask of surprise as his eyes scanned the page, then melted into a tired frown and a sigh of resignation. "I've a new task for you, Gajeel. You need to show me to where you found Laxus - he didn't write down a meeting place. This could be dangerous, so I want you to keep an eye on things while we're there."

Damn. He really was the Dreyar errand boy.

In the background, Natsu's grating voice unfurled a story of how he shouted some guy half to death and then somebody got shot. If Gajeel wasn't careful, he thought he'd go the same way at this rate.