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Desperate Measures

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Cosima stirs slowly moaning happily at the sensation of lips kissing her cheek, down her neck.

“Mmmmm.” She hums happily, hands automatically reaching out to pull Delphine in without thinking or even fully waking. Soft lips meet hers in tender kisses, toying with one lip and then the other. She opens her mouth allowing a hot tongue to slip in, to meet her own. A rush of arousal shivers down her body, heat pooling between her legs. Yes, Cosima thinks… oh god yes.

Delphine feels softer, she can tell that much, but so good. Cosima lets her hands run up Delphine’s spine, tangling her fingers into curly hair. Straightening it was too much of a pain these days.

“Delphine…” She moans again, finally truly awake Cosima stops with a start, “The baby, where’s the baby?” She holds Delphine still.

“I put Céleste in her crib,” Delphine whispers back, “She’s just been fed, she’s out.”

“Another milk coma?” Cosima giggles, kissing Delphine back softly. She has to ease off, she doesn’t want to get too excited. Céleste isn’t even a month old yet, it’s too soon, they have another 2.5 weeks to go before 6 weeks. Blissfully, Brigitte had left yesterday, it was just them and Céleste now.

Delphine grins, leaning back in, “Mmm oui.” Soft lips begin their delicate torture, tongue teasing mercilessly, “She’s asleep, don’t worry.” Cosima groans contentedly, kissing, why had they stopped kissing like this? Her body responds near instantly with arousal dripping from her within minutes. Delphine is pressed completely against her, her body not caring about the small differences. Delphine’s breasts are heavy, and larger. She still has a bit of a belly… Is her nipple wet? Cosima puzzles for a moment, before deciding on baby-saliva as the best explanation.

“Woah… Delphine… I’m getting like really excited here.” Cosima holds her lover by the shoulders, keeping her lips off her, temporarily, “We need to stop or slow this midnight makeout session down…”

“Non, ma chérie, I’m going to make love to you.” Delphine pushing forward, kissing whatever she can reach.

"But we can’t -" Cosima protests for a minute, before one of her own nipples is enthusiastically sucked into Delphine’s mouth. She lets out a low groan in response.

"I need this." Delphine assures releasing her nipple with a pop, returning to the same gentle torture. Her pyjamas are peeled off quickly, “I need to be with you.”

“We… we can wait. I can wait.” Cosima protests half-heartedly. Not fair certainly, but her body longs to feel Delphine’s again. Even if it’s only this. She’s already swollen and hot, aching for Delphine. Is this just for her? Could she touch Delphine? The lochia stopped, but… they still had 2.5 weeks to go.

“Oh mon amour, you’re so needy… Let me do this.” Delphine moans, feeling between her legs, “I still excite you.” Delphine breathes slowly, claiming her lips in another languorous kiss.

“Of course you do.” Cosima reassures with tender kisses, with her own hands grasping at Delphine’s body.

Delphine fingers stroke her gently, slowly before gliding in, “Mmm,” She hums in delight.

“Oh fuck…” Cosima curses quietly, she cannot stop her breath from catching with Delphine’s thrusts.

“Is this good, or do you want my mouth?” Delphine murmurs sweetly, working her gently.

“Don’t stop…” Cosima breathes, rocking her hips upwards, clasping at Delphine’s back, Delphine’s hair, “Oh please don’t stop.”

It’s quick, Delphine’s fingers working her to climax expertly as she continues to kiss and suck at her skin. She crashes over the edge with a low cry, aftershocks shuddering through her body.

“Delphine…” Cosima kisses her cheeks sweetly, her mouth, “That was so good.” Fast, Cosima reasons, but intense… She lets her eyes wander down Delphine’s body. Would she let her touch her breasts? Fondle them? Taste? Should she offer something in return?

“Shh… you might wake her.” Delphine strokes her face for the minute, laying a last tender kiss on her lips, before disentangling their bodies and rolling back over.

“What?” Cosima reaches for Delphine, “Is that it?”

“Get some sleep, Céleste will be awake in less than two hours.” Delphine murmurs sleepily into her pillow.

“But… Delphine...don’t you want...something?” Cosima shifts to lean over her, laying a soft kiss on an exposed shoulder.

When she receives no response, she glances at the clock. 2:41 am. “What the hell?” Cosima shakes her head, but it takes time for her to settle to sleep once again

**

Céleste whimpers, but before Delphine can climb from the bed to get her, Cosima shushes her, “I’ll get her.”

“You’re awake?” Delphine smiles, “Merci.”

She walks the few steps to the crib and gently scoops up the baby, “Awww hello hungry one. Who’s Mommy’s hungry baby?”

“Cosima, give me the baby before she starts wailing.” Delphine holds out her arms.

“Right, right,” Cosima passes off Céleste and climbs back into bed, rolling over.

She pulls her baby to her bare chest to nurse, it’s getting easier, Delphine remarks silently as she lays back, letting Céleste feed. She finds herself humming softly, looking down at her baby.

“Do you want me to change her?” Cosima mutters, “I’m awake anyways.”

“Oui,” Delphine smiles as she feels Cosima slip from the bed to grab the changing mat and a fresh prefold diaper. Cosima had exceeded expectations, watching videos, reading books… and yet she worries. Cosima’s not… the same. Not the sex...

“You okay?” Cosima regards her softly, flicking on the lamp to the lowest setting.

“Are you? With me? With this?” Delphine elaborates from her reclined position.

Cosima smiles, “Well… yeah.”

“It’s not as good for you, is it? The sex.”

“It’s not you, Delphine,” Cosima rolls her eyes, “It’s… it’s been like this since the hysterectomy. It’s still good. I still love you. I still orgasm… it’s just… not the same.”

“I wish I could make it the same,” Delphine tears up, stroking at the soft curls on Céleste’s head. Their daughter continues feeding, unperturbed by the conversation between her mothers.

“It’s not your fault.” Cosima punctuates the sentence with a kiss to the head, “You could...let me do something for you?”

Delphine snorts softly, “Maybe next week… next time we do this.”

“Next week? You’re scheduling this? Like a chore? Every thursday get Cosima off?!” Cosima looks at Delphine incredulously, she’s put it together.

“Yes.” Delphine answers simply, “I...I don’t want you seeking this elsewhere. I want to maintain this, for you anyways.”

“Are you that worried about losing me?”

“Yes.”

“Even now?” Cosima gestures between themselves and Céleste, “I mean, it’s not official yet - but her last name is Niehaus-Cormier, it’s going to be on her birth certificate and her health card… and everything. I mean I know I’ll have to like adopt her… which is shitty… but-”

“But what?”

“We’re like a family? The three of us.”

 

“And your sisters.”

“Yeah. And my sisters. Always my sisters.” Cosima nods and rolls her eyes.

Céleste unlatches herself and Delphine quickly holds her out for Cosima to change, “Here change her.”

“Don’t you want to finish the whole feeding thing? You’re lopsided.” Cosima gestures with a smirk.

“If I give her the other breast, she will fall asleep feeding and then you will have to try to change her without waking her…Which you won’t be able to do. And then you can try to put her back to sleep.”

“Right right… sleeping baby thing.” Cosima pulls Céleste into her arms with a smile, “Hi Celeste…”

She watches Cosima change her with a grin on her face, quickly switching out the wet prefold for a freshly folded dry one and refastening the cover on their baby. She’d gotten the hang of that. Maybe even more quickly than Delphine.

“Je t’aime. Je vous aime.” Delphine sighs softly, looking over at her lover and baby.

"Oh my god this is awesome." Cosima remarks happily as she re-snaps the sleeper, "She’s smiling at me."

"Mon ti-ange. " Delphine leans over to croon at Céleste.

Cosima looks up from their happy smiling daughter, "Let's have another one!"

"What?" Delphine responds shocked.

"Another baby?" Cosima tries again more sheepishly, “Not like tomorrow… or even next year… but… umm eventually?”

Delphine blinks in disbelief, “You’d want that?”
“Why not? You’re already the love of my life. Mother of my child… well gestational mother of our child… technically, but that ruins the whole flow.”

Delphine giggles despite herself, pulling Céleste back in to finish her feeding on her side, as Cosima runs the wet diaper over to the wet pail and tosses it in.

“We can talk about it on her second birthday.” Delphine volunteers after a short deliberation.

“Delphine have you thought about getting our own diapers I was reading online we can save a shit-ton of money washing them ourselves… Or I could wash them myself… and you could not deal with it?’

“Demain… Tomorrow.” Delphine begs, she’s too tired for this now. Surely Cosima must see that.

“Okay, I love you…” Cosima grins, flicking off the light and crawling back into bed.

“Je t’aime aussi.”

“So… umm as I am bizarrely awake… when are we going to make this official?”

“Quoi?” Delphine blinks in confusion. What is Cosima even talking about. What now?”

“Marriage Delphine. Our marriage. You know a wedding… or not, we could just go down to city hall and get it done… go out for dinner right after, bring Céleste right along with us.”

“You want to marry me?”

“Yeah. Of course.” Cosima leans in closer, spooning behind her, “That’s what I’m talking about isn’t it? Us… for the rest of our lives. And whoever else come along… you know… our family.”

“Yes.” Delphine tries not to cry, failing terribly, “I’ll marry you. Tomorrow if you want.”

“Well… it’s up to you… we can like wait a couple months. Or a year… whatever. But I kinda want to do this ASAP, you know?”

Delphine smiles, tearing up again more, “This is everything to me… do you know that?”

“I love you… even when I’m pissed at you… we’ll make it work. We’ll make this work, you know?” Cosima kisses her shoulder, attempting comfort, “Oh don’t cry, please don’t cry my love.”

“You never call me your love.” Delphine sobs.

“You are… you are, you know. I am totally in love with you. I always have been.”

“But you’ve loved others… not just me.”

“Yeah… but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you. Or that I don’t want to be with you.” Cosima comforts with soft lips and hands.

“I’ve only loved you.” Delphine sobs, leaning back into Cosima’s embrace.

“I know, I know… and when we’re pissed you love me, when I’m an ass you love me…”

“Please don’t be an ass again.” Delphine manages to laugh through her tears.

“I won’t… I’m going to try. This is it. You know?”

“Yes… I do.” Delphine nods, tears slowing. She has her daughter, and she has her Cosima, for now, that will have to be enough.