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A Gentleman Never Tells

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“Galahad, Kay, report to Arthur at once for your next mission assignment.” Merlin told them over com.

“On our way.” Jess replied.

Eggsy grinned and gestured for Jess to go ahead. Jess rolled his eyes but smiled a bit. It was a short, two minute walk down the corridor to Arthur’s office. Jess had every intention of knocking but Eggsy just burst on in.

“Haaaarry!” Eggsy said rather loudly, causing Harry to nearly spill his tea.

“Galahad.” Harry replied calmly, “Kay, hello. Both of you sit while I go over your new assignment.”

They each took a seat, Eggsy inclining to put his feet on Harry’s desk before Harry swiftly pushed them off. Jess smirked, Eggsy whined, Harry ignored.

“Now, there is a reason I selected you both for this mission. Kay, you’re quite familiar with the area for one, as well as knowing a few of the American Kingsman agents. You both will be sent to Hartford, Connecticut...” Jess nearly spit out his water. Eggsy couldn’t contain his laughter, not that he tried to.

“Excuse me, what?” Jess wanted to make sure he heard right.

Harry repeated himself before going on to explain the objective and time period. They were to be investigating and infiltrating a smuggling ring that quite a few members of Hartford High Society seemed to be a part of for the next few months. The meeting continued another 15 minutes before they were dismissed. “Galahad, Kay, do be careful.” Harry’s gaze lingered a bit on Eggsy.

“Yes, Arthur.” Jess replied before leaving.

“Don’ worry, bruv. M’ always careful.” Eggsy stole a kiss from Harry before all but sprinting from the room. Harry looked a bit shocked, but pleased none the less.


The next few days were spent prepping and packing for the mission. Merlin fit them with some lovely gadgets and weaponry. He also covered a few of the finer details with them and got them started on their covers, unfortunately Jess would have to use his real name do to the area they were headed, but Eggsy would be given a false name. Merlin also mentioned the possibility of the mission having some honeypot aspects in order to prepare them thoroughly.

After they were dismissed and packed, Roxy came to wish them luck and see them off. She had agreed to watch JB and Brixton for them while they were gone. An hour later they boarded the jet and were off.


They landed in New Haven around 2pm EST. They grabbed their things and headed to the car they’d be using for the duration of their stay, it was a black Aston Martin Vanquish. “I get to drive.” Jess said before Eggsy could call it.

Eggsy sighed and relented. “Fine, but I get ta drive it at some point.” They tossed their bags in the trunk and got in. Jess drove out of the airport and towards Stars Hollow. Eggsy had somewhat coerced them into staying there, he wanted to see what the place was like, plus the Inn had a room available, it’d also be good for their covers.

A few minutes into the drive, Eggsy put on Blank Space by Taylor Swift, Jess made a face, Eggsy spoke up. “Don’ ya even start, bruv. I know for a fact ya like this song. Caught ya listenin’ to it back at base.”

Before long, Jess gave in and sang along loudly with Eggsy. It wasn’t long till they were pushing 90mph. When they drove into Stars Hollow, they were just barely down to 50mph and still blasting their music. They certainly made an entrance to say the least. Jess pulled up in front of Luke’s diner and parked. Eggsy shut off the radio and they walked inside. The whole town was watching, really though Jess should have expected that. They were even more shocked when they realized one of the posh dressed men, was Jess Mariano. The bell on the door jingled as they entered. “Uncle Luke.” Jess greeted with a smirk.

"What the hell Jess?!" Luke nearly yelled in response. He couldn't believe his eyes. Not only was his nephew safe and alive but very clearly had made some changes in his life. "What's with all of that?" He gestured at the bespoke suit Jess was wearing. "And why the hell didn't you call me? Let me know you were all right."

Jess' smirk faltered momentarily. "I've uh...been working abroad in London..for a fashion house, we specialize in menswear. I actually have dual citizenship now. I'm sorry I didn't call, it slipped my mind.”

Luke frowned a bit. “And your friend?”

“M’ Taron Egerton, we work together, and he’s quite tha lover too.” Eggsy said with a shit eating grin.

Merlin choked on his tea via the com and sputtered a bit before he could speak “Galahad!” he managed to scold. “That wasn’t the cover we agreed on!” Jess looked mortified.

“Ain’t that right, luv?” Eggsy kissed his cheek. “I’ll be back in a sec, Merlin’s calling.” With that, he sauntered out to the car to call Merlin.

“Harry is going to kill me.” Jess mumbled to himself.

Luke’s eyes had gotten huge, Babette was having trouble processing and Miss Patty looked positively giddy. Meanwhile, Lorelai looked like she was about to have an aneurysm.

Patty chose then to speak up, “My, My, Mariano. That’s a fine young man you have there. You’ve grown even more handsome, yourself. That suit does wonders. We're glad to hear you're all right after that nasty simcard trouble.” Patty smiled almost lewdly.

Jess try as he might, could not stop the blush that colored his cheeks. “Thanks..”

“Don’t be a stranger, honey.” With that she got up and left, pulling Babette along with her. She shamelessly pinched his butt before scurrying out of the door. Eggsy who was walking back in, stifled a laugh.

Jess shot him a glare and Lorelai finally broke free of her shock and quickly asked Luke for a to-go cup. He came out of his daze as well and got her the coffee, no questions asked. She then headed off, to undoubtedly call Rory.

“ALRIGHT EVERYONE GET OUT.” Luke shouted. The remaining patrons quickly left, leaving only Jess and Eggsy.

“And you two, sit.”

They did just that.

“Alright, Jess. Let’s start with you. You up and leave the country, no phone call, no nothing! I don’t hear from you for months. Hell. I didn’t even know you left the country! You just bounce after your mom’s wedding, I want some explanations. Especially about all of that.” He gestured at Eggsy and the car. Furthermore do you have any idea how worried we've all been? Jess you didn't call, didn't write....I had no idea if you..." Luke shook his head.

Jess took a deep breath and begin to explain how he’d managed to survive the simcard bullshit and how he'd been working for a New York based fashion house when he and ‘Taron’ met. Taron’s boss was impressed with Jess’ work and offered him a job back in London. Eggsy helped Jess with some details, especially the ‘relationship’ since he was the one to spring that up.

After a rather lengthy talk, Luke was appeased. “ long as you’re happy Jess, I’m happy. Just….call more?”

Jess smiled a little. “I will.”

Luke pulled him into a hug before he went back to the kitchen.

Jess led Eggsy outside to the car and they got in. “What did Merlin say about your change of plans?”

“‘Ee was fine with it after a bit, said it might make some things easier on us, Roxy was still laughin’.” Eggsy didn’t go into much detail, Jess didn’t press.

The ride over to the inn started fairly quiet, but Eggsy broke the silence after a moment. “Who were the three ladies sitting at the table? Especially the hot one.”

Jess paused a minute before speaking. “Uh.. the ‘hot one,” Jess cringed a bit, “Is Lorelai Gilmore, Luke’s girlfriend and Rory’s mom.”

“Shit, bruv! The Rory you’re all hung up on?”

Jess glared but gave a slight nod.

“An’ the other two?”

“The town gossips. Miss Patty owns the dance studio and Babette is Lorelai’s neighbor.”

The conversation ended when they pulled up to the inn and parked.

They got their bags out and walked inside. Jess cursed internally, of course Lorelai would be at the desk. Sensing Jess was uncomfortable, Eggsy took the lead, grabbing his hand to pull him along and walked over to the desk.

Lorelai looked up and forced a smile. “Welcome to The Dragonfly Inn.”

“We’ve a room reserved under tha name Taron Egerton.” Eggsy said with a smile.

Lorelai found the reservation and grabbed their room keys. “Right this way, Taron….Jess.”

“Lorelai.” Jess nodded tensely.

She led them up to room number 9 at the end of the upstairs hall. “If you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask.” With that she quickly left. Eggsy shut the door and Jess set their bags on the bed.

“That was intense, bruv. Swore either of ya was goin ta suffocate under all tha tension.”

Jess flipped him off, Eggsy laughed and they started unpacking and settling in.


Lorelai had shut herself in the office and dialed Rory’s cell. “Rory..I have some rather unexpected, shocking and downright perplexing news. I still can’t believe it and I watched it happen. It involves the J-word. Mommy back. Bye Loin Fruit.”