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Never Thought I'd See The Day (When We Parted Ways)

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“I-,” Oikawa stayed still, not knowing what to say. “What do you mean you want to break up?”

Four days later, the memory was still fresh. It was like Iwaizumi had imprinted those words in him, like he had tattooed the words into his soul, making sure that Oikawa never forgot them.

“It’s just not working, Oikawa,” Iwaizumi said, packing his things into a luggage and zipping it shut. “I just don’t want to be with you anymore.”

Four days later, Oikawa was still in his bed –their bed. He was still in the big grey sweater that Hajime had left –whether it was accidental or purposely, Tooru will never know. He was still lying in bed, with the covers surrounding him, and he was still leaning against his pillow, which was now damp with tears.

“Iwa-chan, what do you mean it’s not working?” He asked, his voice slightly getting faster, “We’re fine right? Iwa-chan please tell me we’re-“ Tooru stops and turns to Hajime. “We’re fine, right?”

Oikawa’s heart races as he reaches for his ringing phone, hoping to God that it would be him, but just like always, it isn’t. He throws his phone across the room, wincing when he hears it thud against a wall. He probably cracked it, but he didn’t care. He didn’t care about his phone, he just wanted Hajime back where he belonged in their way-too-small-for-the-two-of-them bed in his spot right next to Oikawa.

Hajime smiles sadly, turning his head towards the door.“No,” He whispers, “we’re not fine and we’ve never been fine. We’ve been anything but fine Oikawa,” and if the way that Hajime worded it was to soothe Tooru, it was doing anything but that."

His heart was tangled, twisted, and was beating way too fast in his chest. Maybe it was all a dream, maybe Iwaizumi would kiss him good morning once again and it would all be just a dream –but it wasn’t, and Oikawa knew that, but he didn’t want it to be true.

“Iwa-chan, please don’t go,” He cries out, through his strained voice, calling the boy’s name over and over again. “Iwa-chan, Iwa-chan please, Iwa-chan,” but his efforts were no use.

Gripping the sheets, he curls himself into a ball, and inhales deeply. His scent is still on the shirt, his voice still rings in Oikawa’s ears and it hurts so badly. He wants nothing more than to see Iwaizumi call him “dumbass” and grin. He wants Iwaizumi to walk through that door and say he was wrong, say that he wasn’t thinking and that he loves him, but no. Oikawa knows that won’t happen no matter how badly he wants it to and it just hurts.

“You think I enjoy this?” Hajime says, shaking his head. “This is for you, Oikawa. You deserve better, much better.” And when Tooru tries to voice out, that Hajime is enough, and he will always be enough, the words don’t come out.

Oikawa grasps at his sweater, feeling his body warmth and inhaling his scent and it’s all just too much and –oh, how he wants Iwaizumi to press kisses to his forehead, to his neck, to his stomach, his thighs, everywhere. He just wants Iwaizumi and when his cellphone rings once again, he doesn’t hesitate to answer.

“Iwa-chan? Iwa-chan is that you? Listen I’m sorry for what I’ve done and I don’t want this to end please, just please come home and I’ll even-,” He gets interrupted faster than the speed that he was talking at. “Uh, hi.” It’s him, and Oikawa’s heart is pumping at a thousand miles per minute. “I’m sorry,” Oikawa says, “Please, just please come home and stay with me and never leave just please.” He knows he’s begging, he knows this isn’t like him but just hurts not having the one man he's ever loved –and will probably ever love.

He hears a sigh on the other side of the line, before the voice speaks again. “I was just calling because I think I left a sweater there.” Short and simple, just like the breakup. But Oikawa presses on, “Please Iwa-chan, just come back and be here with me. Please, I lo-,” He hiccups, and continues, “I love you so much, so so much,” He cries through the phone. And yet in the years and years that they’ve known each other, this was the first time Iwaizumi hung up the phone, without a goodbye.

Tears roll down Oikawa’s face, creating new wet tracks down the sides of his face. He wants to call back, he wants to tell Iwaizumi how much he loves him, he wants him back and it just hurts so much up until the point where Oikawa doesn’t know what to do with himself. But he can’t. And he understands that, but he wishes it wasn’t true.

“How is this for me, Iwaizumi?” Tooru spits out Hajime’s name like it burns his throat, which at this point, it really did. “How is this supposed to benefit me in anyway?” His voice is starting to get louder, yet he’s trying to tame his voice and he just can’t.

Hajime chucks a red alien plush that Tooru had given him on one of their first dates, and Tooru just stood in shock. “It’s just not working, Oikawa. You’ll meet better people, those who can make you happier, and those who will treat you better.” Hajime zips up the luggage, before carrying it to the door. “Just know that I love you,” He smiled gently, before opening the door and making his way out. “Iwa-,” He gasps for breath, not being able to breathe through his constant cries, “Hajime, I love you too, so much.” Hajime looks at Oikawa one more time, and whispers, “Goodbye, Tooru.” Oikawa bursts into tears, desperate to throw his arms around the other boy, begging, pleading him not to leave. “Iwa-chan,” He chants over and over again through his mangled breaths, and although he knows that the other boy is gone, he continues to talk, not wanting to realize that the other had already went out the door, out of his life, out of his reach.

And even now, he still doesn’t realize, because never in his life did he think that his best friend, his lover, his everything, would be gone. Never did he think they’d part ways, and yet here Oikawa is, on what once was their bed, in his sweater, but one thing is different, and for the first time, he’s lying in bed;

Without him.