Simon was scared. Not his normal pissing his pants terrified like he usually was when it came to downworlder drama. He’s been a vamp for a little over six months now and he’s still scared of this life. This though? This was the most scared Simon had ever been in his life.
When he talked Raphael into helping Clary and the others in taking down a pack of rabid werewolves who just didn’t care about anything but killing mundanes, Raphael did a lot of grumbling and ranting but eventually agreed. Simon didn’t know, didn’t think anything like this would actually happen.
He watched as Raphael went down, a werewolf attached to his front trying to bite and tear as much as it could and Simon saw red. Sure Raphael and him still argued and teased each other but it was different now… It was almost friendly. And for the last two months Simon was blatantly ignoring his growing feelings for the man.
Before he realized what he was doing, he launched himself at the wolf, dragging it away from the now unconscious Raphael. He didn’t even think as he attacked the wolf, he didn’t feel anything but rage. He didn’t know how long he was on top of the other, he just knows Jace and Alec pulled him off looking uncharacteristically shocked.
Clary was in front of him saying something but he didn’t hear it, his eyes went to Raphael who still hadn’t gotten up. He tugged himself away from the Shadowhunters and stumbled over to the man. He heard Clary saying his name and Isabelle telling her to let him be. He dropped to his knees next to Raphael and grabbed the other's hand. He couldn’t lose him, he realized. He knew he had feelings for the elder vampire but he didn’t realize how much until this very moment.
“Get up. Raphael I’m serious GET UP!” He shook Raphael’s shoulder but nothing.
He knew for a fact if he had a heart it would be beating a mile a minute right now.
“Raphael please. Come on get up! You need to wake up I can’t do this without you!”
He heard Clary crying behind him. He ignored her.
“Please. Please!” He shook Raphael’s shoulder once more and started to pray to any god that would listen that Raphael would hear his words.
He almost turned to Clary to tell her to shut up when he realized it wasn’t her who spoke. He looked down and Raphael’s eyes were fluttering open. Simon let out an unnecessary breath.
“God don’t scare me like, that what’s wrong with you!” He slapped Raphael’s shoulder and tried to look annoyed like Raphael usually did to him. He didn’t want to show how relieved he actually was that he was alive.
“Oh I’m sorry was my almost dying scary for you." Raphael grunted, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
Simon rolled his eyes but gave a small smile. He leaned down close to Raphael’s ear, ignoring the others standing close by.
“Please. Please don’t ever do that again.”
He wasn’t really expecting Raphael to say anything and if he did, he was expecting something with Raphael’s normal brand of snark but Raphael’s hand grabbed his and he squeezed it lightly.
“I’ll try. I’m sorry for scaring you” His voice was low and sincere. Simon smiled down at him and he was pretty sure Raphael was going to return the smile when he heard a throat clearing behind them. Simon sat up, remembering that they had an audience. He looked over his shoulder to see Izzy and Clary smiling, an annoyed Jace and a very bored looking Alec.
“If you're done having your weird little moment we need to keep going,” Jace said and Simon glared at him.
“We’re done for the night. We aren’t doing this until he’s rested.”
Jace glared back at him. “We only got half the pack, Simon, this can’t wait. They’re killing people!”
“And he’s not dying for your cause,” Simon yelled, letting his fangs drops. He realized what he had said, it wasn’t their cause anymore it was the Shadowhunters'.
"Simon,” Clary whispered but he shook his head.
“I love you clary and I’m always happy to help you but he’s not dying for this, we can continue tomorrow or we’re out.”
He stood and held his hand out to Raphael who took it and Simon tugged him up. Raphael’s jacket and shirt were shredded. For the first time ever, Simon was the one to hand his jacket to Raphael. Raphael raised his eyebrow but took the jacket and shrugged it on.
Simon watched as Raphael started to take a step and falter. He quickly grabbed the man around the waist to help hold him up. Raphael didn’t say thank you but the look he gave Simon said it for him. He turned to the others and Jace looked like he was about to say something when Alec shocked them all by being the one to speak up.
“We got half of them, we can do the rest tomorrow. We all need to be patched up and rest.” He stared Jace down who just glared and walked away.
Alec turned to Raphael. “Will you be willing to help us tomorrow?”
Simon knew he hated asking downwolrlders for help with anything and gave Alec a small smile in exchange.
“I’ll be here tomorrow."
Raphael sighed next to him. “Well I’ll be here, to see this moron doesn’t get himself killed.”
Simon rolled his eyes. “Right because I didn’t save your life or anything”
Alec cut them off. “Right we’ll see you tomorrow then." And he was gone, following Jace.
Izzy game Simon a smile before leaving and Clary was the last to go with a small wave and a “we are so talking later”. Simon watched as they left and turned towards Raphael when the Shadowhunters were gone.
“I totally saved your life.”
Raphael let out an annoyed noise and shook his head.
“Just admit it," Simon said, helping the other walk down the empty back street.
Raphael didn’t say anything for a moment but stopped suddenly, making Simon lose his balance for a second.
“What? Are you okay,” he asked, looking up and down Raphael’s body for any injury he might have missed before.
“I'm fine. Thanks to you.”
Simon was sure he was hearing things. “What was that?”
“I’m not repeating myself,” Raphael said between his teeth and Simon nodded and helped the other begin to walk again.
“But just to let you know, I’d do it again,” Simon said and as he said it he realized it was true, he would lay his life down for this man.
“And I’d do the same for you.”
Simon knew he was probably only saying it because Simon had saved him or because he was part of the creepy family Raphael had but a part of him wanted it to be because Raphael felt the same about him.
“I know,” was all he could think to say and really it was all that needed to be said. He helped Raphael to the hotel. The place he used to hate, the place he now called a home. The place that now felt like a home. Simon smiled to himself as they walked up the steps. It wasn’t home because it had to be, he realized, it was home because Raphael made it feel like home.