“Let me guess, you're his other mother,” Regina said before she went back to packing her case.
“Yes, and your wife.”
Regina froze and turned slowly on the spot, staring open mouthed at the blonde woman before her.
“Excuse me?” she said, convinced she had misheard.
“Yeah,” Emma nodded. “After years of bickering and awkward friendship you finally confessed to me that the reason you had tried to run me out of town when I first arrived was because you thought I was insanely attractive. We got married last month but then the author showed up and disrupted our lives again. We didn’t even get a chance to go on our honeymoon.”
Regina slowly sank into a chair, her brain trying desperately to process what had just been said to her as well as formulating a plan to escape from the crazy people who had invaded her home. This unknown woman from an alternate universe had shown up and was claiming to be her wife. And she had a son, a son who was waiting outside for them so they could break some curse and return to … somewhere. She leaned forwards, arms on her knees and rubbed her face with her hands, trying to think.
A pair of boots appeared in her line of vision and she raised her head, meeting the simultaneously amused and concerned gaze of Emma.
“Nope,” Regina said, standing up and pushing past the blonde to continue her packing. “There’s a psycho woman in my cave trying to convince me we’re a family and I need to leave in ten minutes. I’m not ok.”
“Come on, just listen to me.”
“You’re insane,” she snapped at last. “You and Henry are completely insane. I don’t have a son. We’re not married. I’m not the Mayor of a town I created using some dark curse. And I’m not going to help you break this new curse by kissing my arch-nemesis, Robin Hood.”
“No, you're not,” Emma frowned. “Who told you that?”
“Henry,” Regina said. “He told me Robin was my True Love and then, coincidentally, I met him today.”
“And he smells like forest and is engaged to a prissy redhead,” Regina replied.
“Well he's not your True Love anyway,” Emma said. “I am.”
“Of course you are,” Regina snarked. “You’re my wife, after all.”
“Yes,” Emma nodded.
“Then why did Henry send me after Robin Hood?”
This time it was Emma’s turn to sink into the chair. She looked tired, Regina realised, and her whole posture appeared defeated.
“Henry isn't all that happy about us being together,” she said at last.
“Our son doesn’t want his mothers to be together?” Regina said, pushing aside how crazy the sentence sounded to her own ears because, for some reason, her curiosity about this family which had tumbled into her life, was piqued.
“Not exactly,” Emma sighed. “It’s more that he thinks we’ll hurt each other. Neither of us have the best track records when it comes to relationships and Henry seems to think that together we’re a recipe for disaster.”
Regina listened, waiting for Emma to continue.
“He didn’t know for months when we first got together. And then he found out without us telling him. I think he felt betrayed or something, I don’t know. But ever since then he’s been … reluctant to support us. Even when we got married, he wasn’t convinced it was going to last.”
“So he wants me to kiss Robin Hood under this new curse to prove that we’re not True Loves?” Regina asked.
Emma nodded, looking up at the woman whom she knew so well and smiling weakly. “Yeah, that’s about right.”
“But it won’t work? I mean, if I was … to kiss,” she made a face, “Robin, this supposed curse wouldn’t break?”
“No,” Emma sighed.
“Then what will break it?”
“Our kiss,” Emma said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “So I don’t know why we’re still sitting around in a cave when we could be back in our world with central heating and indoor plumbing.”
Regina barked out a laugh. “So … you want me to kiss you to break a curse, at which point we’ll be whisked away to a far off land where you and I are married and our teenage son disapproves of our relationship?”
“Yeah, sounds about right,” Emma nodded. “And yes, I know that’s a lot to ask you to believe but really all I need is for you to kiss me. If what I’m saying is the truth then you’ll return to our wonderful life and if it isn’t, then you’ll have had a great kiss with a sexy blonde.”
Emma winked and Regina rolled her eyes. If the blonde was telling the truth she couldn’t understand how she could possibly have fallen for the other woman. True, she was attractive. But she was also annoying and abrupt and …
“Put that down,” Regina snapped, snatching her bow out of Emma’s hand.
“Sorry,” Emma said. “You hate it when I touch your stuff at home too.”
“This is my home,” Regina huffed.
“No, it isn’t,” Emma implored. “Come on Gina. Just kiss me.”
“Yeah,” Emma nodded.
“I let you call me Gina?” the brunette asked slowly.
“Um, yeah,” Emma said. “You hated it at first though. You said it reminded you of your father because he called you it but over time you got used to it.”
“My … my father?”
Emma smiled sadly. “Do you believe me now?”
Regina sank back into her chair, eyes filled with tears. She tried so hard not to think about her father and how he had died protecting her from Snow White. His kindly face swam before her eyes, and an echo of his voice calling out her nickname filtered through her ears.
Emma crouched down in front of her and reached out to wipe the tears away. Regina flinched but allowed the contact.
“I’m sorry,” Emma offered. “I didn’t mean to bring him up. I know how much you miss him in our world so I’m guessing you miss him a lot here too?”
“I do,” Regina sniffed. “So much.”
There was a long silence, Emma staying crouched before her wife.
“Look,” she said after a while. “I don’t mean to hurry you but if we could break this curse and get back to our old lives then I could make you blueberry pancakes and a strong cup of tea and cheer you up a bit. I don’t think the comfort food here is quite the same.”
Regina sighed and wiped her tear streaked face. She looked up at the green eyes before her and felt her heart skip a beat. Well, what did she have to lose?
“Um … ok then,” she nodded, standing up and causing Emma to rise too.
“Thanks,” Emma grinned, stepping closer and taking Regina’s hands in her own.
The connection felt strange, but not entirely unpleasant. Emma smiled reassuringly at her as she reached up and brushed a lock of brown hair from her eyes. Fingers traced down her jawline and a shiver shot down Regina’s spine.
“I love you,” Emma murmured as she leaned in.
Their lips connected, the flesh soft and tender. Regina closed her eyes, parting her lips instinctively. As Emma’s lower lip slid between her own, it happened. A pulse of magic, white hot and delicious, exploded from between their mouths, radiating through the cave and out into the Enchanted Forest. The kiss didn’t stop however and Regina moaned in delight when Emma’s hands wrapped around her and grasped her ass.
They broke apart when they heard Henry’s confused tone. Then they both did a double take. They were standing in the middle of Storybrooke high street, arms looped around each other and various residents of the town clambering to their feet from positions they appeared to landed in moments before.
“It worked?” Regina said, eyebrows raised.
“Did you doubt it?” Emma asked, turning back to her wife.
“Well, not Storybrooke Regina, of course,” she said with a kiss to Emma’s smirking lips. “But Bandit Regina? Yeah, she thought you were batshit crazy.”
Emma laughed. “Thanks for that. But at least I was able to persuade you to kiss me even despite that. Clearly I’m just unbelievably attractive.”
“And modest,” Regina laughed.
“Moms,” Henry repeated. “Did you guys break the curse?”
The two women turned towards their son together, arms linked around their backs.
“Yes kid,” Emma nodded.
“We told you it was True Love, Henry,” Regina said gently. “Do you believe now that we’re both in this for the long haul.”
Henry stood for a moment, worrying his lip between his teeth before he flung himself into his mothers’ arms.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled into their shoulders.
“It’s ok,” Emma assured. “You were just trying to protect us.”
“But you didn’t need protecting,” Henry said as he pulled away. “You’re the Saviour and the Evil Queen. How did I not see it before? It makes complete sense that you two would be each other’s happy endings. Only an idiot would fail to see the logic in that.”