“One day...I’m going to marry you, Alexander Lightwood."
Alec looked at his best friend Magnus laying next to him. “Boys can’t marry boys.”
Magnus laughed. “Then we will be the first.”
Alec smiled at that.
It would be fun to be married to your best friend, he thought.
“Of course we have to wait until we’re older,” Magnus said with a casual smile.
Alec had met Magnus in Kindergarten. Magnus had come up to him during recess, asking him if he wanted to play together on their first day of school. Alec had said yes and every day since then, they had been playing together.
Three years had passed and they had remained best friends.
Every day of their summer break was spent together with sleep overs, camping trips, beach vacations, dips in Alec’s pool, and treks through the woods behind Magnus’ house.
“Okay,” Alec said, his voice small and quiet.
“Yeah...okay,” Alec said with a laugh.
Magnus rolled over onto his side to look at Alec.
Alec rolled over onto his side to face Magnus, a shy smile on his face.
“It’ll be so much fun-” Magnus began just as Alec’s mom’s voice shouted from downstairs.
“Magnus! Your mom is here for you!”
Magnus dropped his head, pretending to be dead.
“This is why we should be married, then we wouldn’t have to leave each other because we would always be together.” Magnus opened his eyes, a sad look on his face for having to leave so soon.
“I’d like that,” Alec said with a nod.
Magnus smiled at him. “You’re spending the night tomorrow for my birthday party, right?”
“Yeah...my parents said I could,” Alec said.
“Good!” Magnus clapped before leaning down and giving Alec a quick kiss on his cheek.
Alec felt his cheeks grow hot and he put his hand up to touch where Magnus kissed.
Magnus jumped up and slid his shoes on his feet, making his way to the bedroom door. He had his red backpack with Pokemon patches on it slung over one shoulder, and he turned to look at Alec with a sly grin on his face. “Tomorrow...I’ll be older than you.”
Alec narrowed his eyes at Magnus and threw a foam football at him. “Just for a couple of months!”
Magnus laughed and was quick to get out of the ball’s way. He flashed Alec a quick smile before sliding through the door. “Bye, Alec, see you tomorrow!”
Magnus walked home from school, Alec by his side.
Now that they were ten years old, their mothers had given them permission to walk the four blocks back to their neighborhood together.
Alec had a yo-yo that he was slinging down and bringing back up again with ease.
Magnus smiled at the yo-yo that was now skidding across the sidewalk.
Alec looked up at Magnus, the corner of his lip up in a smile. “Walking the dog.”
Magnus chuckled. “Those things are impossible.”
Alec brought the yo-yo back up to his palm and tucked it away in the front pocket of his backpack. “Just takes practice.”
Magnus stopped and took Alec by the elbow.
“What is it?” Alec asked, looking down at where Magnus was holding onto him.
“Let’s take the shortcut through the woods,” Magnus suggested.
He saw Alec look at the sidewalk they were supposed to take home and then at the woods before finally settling his gaze on Magnus. Magnus could see the war Alec had going on his mind; torn between doing what his mother instructed and doing what he wanted.
Magnus shrugged. “We don’t have to, it’s fine.”
Alec shook his head. “No, let's go.”
Magnus smiled and headed toward the woods, cutting through someone's backyard. He heard Alec’s uneven, awkward steps behind him.
Magnus paused at a fallen tree and easily climbed over it. He turned and held his hand out to Alec to help him over.
With Alec safely over the tree, Magnus kept their hands together, enjoying the feeling of Alec’s hand in his.
He looked over at Alec who was looking down at their joined hands.
They walked through the woods, hand in hand until they ended up in their woods, the woods behind Magnus’ house that they had explored every inch of.
Alec paused at the gate of Magnus’ fence. “I guess I should get home and do my homework. I’ll call you when I’m done, maybe I can come over after.”
“Okay.” Magnus leaned down and placed a kiss on Alec’s cheek. “See you later.”
He let go of Alec’s hand and went through the gate, a smile on his face as he crossed his back yard.
Alec and Magnus walked through the woods, their steps crunching loudly on the dry, dead leaves and twigs.
Magnus kicked at a rock as they walked.
“Where is this waterfall?” Alec asked, zipping his hoodie up to his neck.
Magnus looked over at Alec and let out a laugh at Alec’s pink tipped nose and his pink cheeks. “You cold?”
Alec shivered, his teeth clattering. “No.”
Magnus pulled his hands out of his hoodie pocket and took Alec’s ice-cold hand in his. “Better?”
Alec smiled and sniffed back his runny nose. “Yeah…your hand is warm.”
“The better to warm you with, my dear,” Magnus said in a wolfish voice, leading them down the path he had discovered yesterday.
He felt Alec thread his fingers through his.
Magnus dropped his chin down and smiled to himself. It wasn’t the first time they had held hands, they had been doing this since they were children but they hadn’t in awhile and this time something felt...different.
Magnus stopped and felt Alec crash into his back. He pointed down at the small stream and the small fall of water that could hardly be considered a waterfall, but water was falling so that’s what he called it. “There.”
Alec moved closer to the edge and looked down. “How are we just now finding this back here?”
Magnus glanced to the side to look at Alec.
Alec was looking down at the waterfall, completely unaware of Magnus. His cheeks were flushed, his bottom lip was chapped and trembling from the cold. Magnus had been looking at this face for what felt like his entire life, and yet he somehow missed the small changes that had happened recently. How Alec’s jaw was now stronger and his cheekbones more defined. His once clear skin now marked with red pimples that Alec was always so embarrassed of, they formed a triangle at the tip of his chin and Magnus could tell Alec had been picking at them.
He was beautiful.
“Want to go down there?” Alec’s words brought Magnus back to the moment.
“Why else would I bring you out here?” Magnus asked with an eyeroll.
“Shut up,” Alec said with the hint of a laugh in his voice.
“We gotta climb down this way.” Magnus let go of Alec’s hand and braced himself on the small tree, securing his footing on the boulders that led down the steep drop off.
“Be careful,” Alec called down.
Magnus jumped and landed securely. “Always am. Your turn.”
He saw Alec’s hesitance and he watched as Alec awkwardly tried to follow in his footsteps.
Magnus reached his hand up. “Take my hand, I won’t let you fall.”
Alec’s eyes met his for a moment and he took Magnus’ hand. He leaned into Magnus’ hold, putting his trust in Magnus by letting his weight bear down as he climbed down.
Alec jumped down, Magnus’ hand in his, stumbling a little on his landing and Magnus was quick to catch him under his arms. “Got you.”
Alec stood up straight, his height not quite reaching Magnus’. He let go of Magnus’ hand and ran it through his thick black hair. His eyes were a light brown, matching the woods around them and Magnus felt his stomach twist when they looked up at him.
“I thought you would get less clumsy once you turned twelve,” Magnus said with a sideways glance at him and a smirk.
Alec rolled his beautiful honey-brown eyes at him, pushing past him to get to the waterfall.
Magnus was standing in front of the mirror, trying to style his hair in the new spiky trend that they had seen on the beach.
Alec watched from his spot on the bed as Magnus danced along to the music that played from the stereo. He was dressed in nothing but black gym shorts and white tube socks. His skin was tanned from the week they had spent in the sun, only the tops of his shoulders showed a tint of red from sunburn. Magnus' voice rose slightly as he sang along to the song.
The balcony door was open and the sound of the ocean outside was coming through along with the salty breeze.
Alec’s parents had agreed to letting them get their own room, next to theirs, on this vacation and he and Magnus felt like proper teenagers. This was something they could go back to school and brag about. Well, Magnus would. Alec would just silently stand beside him, awkwardly towering over everyone in their class. His height had jumped up almost overnight a year ago and he was now taller than Magnus; a fact Magnus was not happy about.
Magnus finished at the mirror and dropped down on the bed right next to Alec.
“Why did you style your hair when we’re going to bed soon?” Alec asked before stuffing a handful of popcorn in his mouth.
Magnus shrugged. “Maybe I want to look beautiful while I sleep.”
Magnus was always beautiful, Alec thought.
With his tan skin, bright smile, and dark eyes. Everything about him was beautiful, and it always had been, at least to Alec.
Magnus groaned. “I don’t want summer to be over yet.”
Alec groaned in agreement, pushing back his thoughts on Magnus, filing them safely away. It was not good that he felt this way about his best friend.
His best friend that was always there to talk to him and to make him laugh.
Alec felt Magnus run a finger up his arm, following a vein, and the touch caused goosebumps to prickle up across his skin.
Magnus sighed. “I have to get braces next week, Alec. I’m going back to school with a mouth full of metal. A freshman with braces. I will be the laughing stock of the entire ninth grade.”
Alec rolled his eyes and put his box of popcorn on the nightstand between their two beds. “Don’t be so dramatic. You only have to wear them for ten to twelve months.”
“That’s a lifetime.” Magnus pouted. “Too bad my teeth aren’t perfect like yours.”
“My teeth aren’t perfect,” Alec argued as he sat up.
“Everything about you is,” Magnus said casually as he grabbed the white sheet from the foot of the bed and whipped it up, filling it with air.
They watched it fall slowly down around them, covering their bodies completely.
He sat up on his knees in front of Magnus. It had been a while since he let himself look at Magnus, really look at him. Now Magnus was in front of him, surrounded in white, nothing to distract Alec from noticing every little detail there was to appreciate.
He saw Magnus’ dark brown eyes flick over his face.
Alec took in the small stubble that lined Magnus’ sharp jaw line, his golden brown skin smooth everywhere else. While Alec was still very much in his awkward phase, Magnus was not.
Puberty had hit Alec like a truck, whereas puberty had taken Magnus under its wing and Magnus had emerged better than ever. His already perfect features even more perfect.
Magnus smiled back at Alec, a closed lipped smile.
Alec reached up and flicked Magnus’ bottom lip with his finger. “You should smile with your teeth, it makes you look happier.”
Magnus laughed and Alec smiled, enjoying the sound. He loved the way Magnus’ eyes would squint and the way his nose scrunched when he laughed. He loved Magnus’ smile, his bright white smile with his two crooked teeth. He loved everything about his best friend.
Magnus’ laughter died down and he licked his lips. “Uh, Alec…”
“I’ve been thinking. I was wondering if you would…” Magnus’ smile fell and he shook his head. “Never mind.”
“What is it, Magnus?”
“It’s stupid, really,” Magnus said with a nervous chuckle.
“Try me,” Alec said.
Magnus looked back at Alec, his eyes going to Alec’s mouth and lingering there as he swallowed nervously. “I was wondering if you would kiss me.”
Alec felt his stomach jump up, his throat closing in around it.
Red tinted across Magnus’ cheeks. “I’m just...I’m gonna have braces and everyone is going to be kissing somebody and I don’t want my first kiss to be with metal in my mouth.”
Alec let out a small laugh. “Who’s going to be kissing in school?”
“Everyone is. Everyone but me. I’m sure you’ll be kissing someone too.”
“I’m not going to be kissing anybody,” Alec said confidently.
“You don’t know that,” Magnus said, shrugging one shoulder up.
Alec swallowed. “And you want me to kiss you? You want me to be your first kiss? Magnus, I don’t even know what I’m doing.”
Magnus laughed. “Neither do I. We could be each other’s practice. Get the awkwardness out of the way- then we can be professionals whenever we find someone to kiss. We’re best friends, it’s not like it’s going to be weird or anything.”
Alec chuckled. “You’re right. We’re best friends. It won’t be weird.”
“Okay?” Magnus asked.
Alec moved in closer to Magnus, adjusting the white sheet that was still over them.
Magnus lifted his heels under him, his seated height almost reaching up to Alec’s height.
Alec leaned in, his heart pounding.
Magnus leaned in, his eyes open and looking directly into Alec’s.
Alec looked down at Magnus’ parted lips and gulped loudly as he looked back up at Magnus.
“Maybe we should close our eyes?” Alec asked Magnus nervously.
“Good idea,” Magnus said, his breath hitting Alec’s lips.
Alec closed his eyes and leaned in. His nose brushing against Magnus’ before their lips met.
The flap of butterfly wings fluttered violently in Alec’s stomach.
They held their lips together for a moment before pulling back.
Alec inhaled sharply before opening his eyes to find Magnus looking at him.
“Was that bad?”
Magnus shook his head and leaned in again, his hands holding Alec’s jaw as he kissed him again.
Alec closed his eyes and let Magnus kiss him.
Magnus tasted sweet like the cherry coke they had shared earlier and Alec was immensely aware of the fact that he must taste like popcorn. He wished he had known this was going to happen. He would have chosen to snack on something sweet instead.
He felt his blood rush to his head, emptying his mind of all his thoughts. He felt as if his heart was going to explode from his chest when Magnus’ lips parted against his. His breathing stopped completely when Magnus’ tongue swiped across his lips. Alec followed Magnus’ lead and opened his mouth slightly, feeling Magnus’ tongue move lightly against his tongue.
Magnus’ leaned more into their kiss, and Alec brought his hand up to rest against the bare skin of Magnus’ waist. Magnus’ breath was heavy against him, reminding Alec to breathe. Their teeth knocked together, their tongues moved tentatively against the other, exploring each other and learning the correct way it should be done.
Much too soon, Magnus pulled away and Alec opened his eyes to see Magnus sitting there, his thumb brushing against his bottom lip, his breathing heavy, his eyes still closed.
Alec tried to catch his breath, his raspy breathing coming out in soft pants. He watched and waited for Magnus to show his reaction. Aled didn’t know if the kiss made Magnus feel the same way it made him feel. He felt his skin tingling, his nerves buzzing, his pulse quick, his limbs numb. The lights of the room even brighter than before.
A smile spread on Magnus’ face and he laughed softly.
Alec smiled and laughed with him.
“That...that will last me through the year.” Magnus opened his eyes and leaned in to kiss Alec on his cheek. “Thank you.”
“Anytime,” Alec said.
He noticed the look of shock and confusion flash through Magnus’ eyes and Alec wished he hadn’t said that. He knew the smile on his face made it painfully obvious that he had fallen in love with Magnus, but he couldn't let his feelings show, that would make what just happened between them weird. Magnus had come to him as a friend and Alec had kissed him as much more than a friend. Because even though they were best friends, Magnus was so much more to him than that.
“I mean, what are best friends for, right?” Alec said with an awkward shrug before laying back, lacing his fingers on top of his chest.
“Yeah...best friends,” Magnus said with a small smile as he pulled the sheets down and laid next to Alec.
He felt the warmth of Magnus resting his head on his shoulder. Alec closed his eyes and took deep breaths to calm his racing heart.
Magnus shut the door to their dorm room to find Alec sitting at his desk between their beds, headphones in his ears, his pencil scratching across the notebook pages.
Magnus had wandered around the campus, trying to clear his head from all that he had on his mind tonight. But standing here in the same room as Alec, he felt every ounce of his bravery seep out of him.
He breathed in deeply. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t confront Alec about his feelings.
They had been best friends to each other since kindergarten and they had also been something else to each other since before Magnus could remember. But Magnus couldn’t put a name on it, there were no words to define what they were for each other. Alec had been Magnus’ first kiss and since that moment, Magnus knew he never wanted to kiss anyone else, but he could never tell Alec that. They had never spoken of that kiss again, and after that night, nothing between them was ever the same again. They had fallen back into the comfort of their friendship and Magnus didn’t want to mess that up.
Tonight Magnus had been asked out by a girl in his Chemistry class-Camille. And Camille...she was beautiful, and dangerous; the target of every man’s attention in that class and yet she had chosen Magnus.
Magnus couldn’t give her an answer because the minute she asked him, his thoughts had turned to Alec. He told her he would text her tonight and so he had come back to the dorm to confront Alec once and for all about what they were to each other.
Magnus knew he didn’t want to date someone else but he also knew he couldn’t spend his life pining for his best friend. He was in love with Alec and he had been his whole life, but he couldn't keep this up. He needed to know how Alec felt about him.
Magnus went up to Alec and pulled the ear bud out of Alec’s ear.
“What the hell?” Alec looked over his shoulder, his brows drawn together. His eyes softening when he noticed it was Magnus.
Magnus sat down on his bed, elbows on his knees, palms together, fingers pushing up under his chin.
Alec’s eyes grew worried and he pulled out his other earbud, the soft sound of classical music coming from the earbuds on the desk. “What’s wrong, Magnus?”
“Camille asked me out,” Magnus blurted out.
Alec’s brows shot up. “That’s...that’s great.”
“Is it?” Magnus asked.
“I think so? Is it not?” Alec’s voice sounded confused, as it always did when it came to the subject of dating.
“What should I do?” Magnus asked, running his hand through his hair.
Alec popped his knuckles and licked his lips. “What do you want to do?”
Magnus looked up at Alec, his eyes were glowing green in the lamplight, matching the green sweater he was wearing. His hair was sticking up on one side, where he had surely been scratching at his head with his pencil as he did his homework.
Everything about Alec was familiar to him, every little thing about him was home and memories.
The scar that cut through Alec's eyebrow had been put there when they had attempted and failed, at building a tree house. The scar under his chin was there from when they both took up skateboarding; Magnus had tried to teach Alec how to ollie and Alec ended up hitting the pavement chin first. Magnus knew everything there was to know about Alec. He was his entire childhood and his whole life.
Alec licked his lips again and Magnus wanted nothing more than to kiss him right now. That was all he ever wanted to do when he would catch Alec licking his lips like that, his tongue curling out, drawing his bottom lip in before retreating back into his mouth, leaving Alec’s lips wet and pink.
Magnus groaned and grabbed his Chapstick out of the drawer beside his bed and threw it at Alec. “Here. Keep it. Never in all your life have I known you to use Chapstick.”
Alec looked down at the Chapstick in his palm, his brows still drawn in confusion.
“Licking your lips dries them out more, you know?” Magnus stood up from his bed and paced back and forth in front of the door.
“Thanks?” Alec asled as he rubbed the Chapstick across his lips.
Magnus looked back at him, his pink lips now glistening softly in the lamp light.
The Chapstick just made it worse.
Alec turned in his chair to look at him. “Magnus, what’s going on?”
“Do you mind if I go out with Camille?” Magnus asked. He held his hands in front of him, his thumb and fingers rubbing together nervously.
Alec shook his head, nonplussed by the question. “Why- why would I mind?”
Magnus felt his hopes fall and he let his shoulders drop. “I just...didn’t want to date her if you didn’t like her.”
Alec shrugged. “I don't know her. But if you like her...go ahead.”
“Okay, I will then.”
“Okay,” Alec said.
“Okay.” Magnus turned and left the dorm.
Your soft hand in mine,
A thousand rushing heartbeats
Stilled by your sweet lips
Magnus read the poem from the notebook Alec left lying open on his bed. Alec was sleeping soundly beside it, his pencil still in his hand, his earbuds playing his classical music in his ears. His lips parted slowly to let out a soft breath and sleeping moan.
Golden skin gleaming
Laughter a beautiful song
Your smile happiness
Magnus traced the indentations the pencil had left in the pages. He felt guilty reading Alec’s private thoughts, without permission and while he slept.
He leaned over and closed the notebook. He didn’t want Alec to know that he had left it open by accident. He knew how private Alec was and having his poems read would probably embarrass him to no end.
Magnus brushed the dark hair away from Alec’s forehead and took the pencil out of Alec’s hand, setting it down on the desk beside him.
Magnus felt his heart ache in his chest as he sat back on his bed.
It seemed his Alexander had found someone to love. Someone that had apparently caught his attention enough to have romantic lines of poetry written about them. Someone that wasn’t him.
Alec tossed and turned in his bed.
He checked the time on the clock that sat on his nightstand.
Magnus had left four hours ago on his date with Camille and Alec had felt sick to his stomach since then.
He didn’t even know why he was waiting up for him like this. Not when there was the very real chance that Magnus wouldn't even make it home tonight.
The thought made Alec’s stomach turn even more and he had to rub at his eyes to stop the room from spinning.
Magnus had given him the chance the other day. The perfect opportunity to finally tell him how he feels about him and Alec had chickened out. He hadn’t expected Magnus to care about his opinion on who he dated and Alec had lied, saying he was okay with it when in fact, the very thought of Magnus being with someone else killed him.
Magnus had only dated one other person, their senior year of high school, and it was short lived. Imasu, the mysterious foreign exchange student. Alec hated Imasu for no good reason other than the fact that he was dating the love of his life.
The familiar sound of keys unlocking the door flooded the room, relief washing over him.
Magnus walked in and kicked his shoes off, locking the door behind him.
“How was your date?” Alec asked from the darkness of his bed.
“Jesus fuck, Alec!” Magnus said, his hand clutching over his heart. “Why are you just laying here in the dark?”
“Couldn’t sleep,” Alec said casually when what he really wanted to say was, I couldn’t sleep without you.
“Oh.” Magnus removed his shirt, throwing it into the laundry basket in the corner.
The moonlight streamed in through the window, landing in horizontal streams over the strong muscles of Magnus’ back, the dimples on his low back standing out as he bent over to remove his pants.
Alec knew they had done this a million times before, he had seen Magnus in various stages of undress and yet he felt ashamed for watching him in the dark like this. When he was watching for his own selfish reasons.
“Your date...how was it?” Alec asked again, looking at his hands instead of at Magnus.
Magnus let out a long sigh and sat next to Alec at the edge of his bed in nothing but his underwear. “You really want to know?”
Alec sat up on his elbow. “Yeah.”
“It was awful,” Magnus said with a laugh. “Camille is awful.”
Alec felt a weight lift off of his chest and he did his best to hide the satisfaction in his voice. “Oh yeah?”
“Turns out she has a boyfriend. I almost had my ass kicked,” Magnus said with a laugh as he stretched his arms over head.
Alec’s eyes wandered down to look at Magnus’ strong abdomen, every muscle flexing from the motion.
“I’m sorry, Magnus,” Alec said, trying his best to sound genuinely apologetic.
“At least I found out on the first date, right?” Magnus asked resting his hand down on the bed.
Alec reached out and curled his hand over the top of Magnus’. “You’ll find someone.”
Alec saw a sadness fall over Magnus’ features and then Magnus smiled at him through pressed lips before standing up and crossing over to his own bed.
“Good night, Magnus.”
Magnus sat at a table in the corner cafe. He scrolled through his news feed, idly passing the time.
He refreshed his feed and saw the breaking news article.
Magnus smiled widely as he read through the article.
He got up from his seat and threw his cup of coffee in the trash as he pushed his way through the line of customers.
He ran down the busy sidewalks.
He was only a few blocks away from the one place he wanted to be right now.
He reached the apartment building, climbing the stairs quickly. He wasn’t even sure if he was home but he had to check. He dug into his pocket and pulled out the key he had been given. He unlocked the door to the apartment and ran in.
He turned the corner and found Alec reading in his nook along the window.
Alec looked up at him and smiled, not bothered at all that Magnus had let himself into his apartment without warning. “Hey, I didn’t know you were coming over.”
Alec set the book down and looked down at his watch. “Did we have plans?”
“No.” Magnus panted. “We didn’t.”
“Oh.” Alec stood up from his seat. “Did you run here?”
“Is everything okay?” Alec approached him. He was wearing the thick tan sweater that made Magnus want to bury himself in his arms, his hair was messy as usual, his beard dark and overgrown.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just felt like running.” Magnus walked over to Alec’s bed in the corner and had a seat.
Alec went over to the small kitchen in the corner and poured Magnus a glass of water.
“Here,” Alec said, holding the glass out to him.
Magnus drank the water and set it down on the nightstand. “Thanks.”
Alec sat next to him on the bed, crossing his long legs. He looked over at Magnus and his mouth jumped up into a smile. “I like the gold eyeliner, is it new?”
It took Magnus a moment to remember he had used a gold glittery eyeliner today and he loved that Alec noticed.
He nodded. “Yeah, just got it yesterday.”
“Well it looks good. I like it,” Alec said, repeating his compliment.
The nerves returned to Magnus again. The same crippling fear of not knowing what Alec’s reaction would be, but he didn’t want to miss out on another opportunity.
“What’d you want to do? Want to go out and grab some lunch?” Alec asked.
Magnus reached up and ran his fingers through Alec’s hair in an attempt to fix the few flyaway strands.
Alec blushed and whispered softly, “I look like a mess, sorry.”
"No," Magnus whispered. His weak attempt at contradicting Alec's self criticism.
Magnus couldn’t take it any more. He couldn’t sit here and pretend for a minute longer that his heart didn’t pound at the sight of Alec’s smile or that his stomach didn’t flutter from the gleam in his eyes when he smiled. He had to say something.
“Have you seen the news?” Magnus asked.
Alec’s brows dropped. “No, I haven’t checked it today. What happened?”
Magnus rose from the bed, followed by Alec, who stood in front of him, waiting for him to explain.
Magnus reached out and took Alec’s hand in his. The long, slender hands he had grown up with, the same ones he had held as a child and had come to know in every way throughout their lives together.
He laced his fingers through Alec’s and was happy to feel that Alec wasn’t pulling away.
“What is?” Alec’s thumb swiped across the back of Magnus’ hand, sending a shiver up his arm.
“Marriage equality. It was just announced.” Magnus watched as Alec’s furrowed brows rose in shock, his mouth parting to speak.
“Alec, I had to come tell you-” Magnus felt his breath rush out of him. Alec was watching him, his brown eyes patiently waiting for him to finish. Magnus swallowed and took in a deep breath of air and let it out slowly. “I had to come here to tell you that I have been in love with you for as long as I can remember, and I feel like our entire relationship has been dancing around this place of being best friends and something more...and I just, I needed to know if you feel the same way. Because, I know what I want, and what I want is...you. Just you, for the rest of my life, Alec.”
Magnus paused, his eyes never leaving Alec’s. “And if you would have me, I would marry you right here and right now. I would spend the rest of my life being your best friend and your husband.”
Alec’s eyes widened, red creeping across his cheeks and his hand gripped tighter in Magnus’ hold.
He licked his lips slowly, his eyes moving across Magnus’ features, his breath hitching in his throat as he spoke, “Magnus…”
Magnus’ smile fell and he took a step back.
His fear crashed over him. He had been wrong. There hadn't been anything more than friendship between them.
He had never meant to fall in love with his best friend but he had and now he had ruined the best thing in his life. “I should go.”
Magnus turned to leave and he felt Alec’s hand hold onto him, pulling him back towards him until they were chest to chest.
Alec’s other hand trembled as it traced a line along Magnus’ jaw. “Magnus, you have always been the love of my life. I’ve known that since we were eight years old. I just- I never thought you would feel the same way about me, but you are all I have ever wanted.”
Alec’s hazel eyes were focused intently on him, his pupils blown wide, a smile curving the corner of his mouth. “Did you just say you want to marry me?”
Magnus let out a small laugh. “It shouldn’t be such a surprise. I mean I already told you once before…”
Alec’s brow went up. “You did?”
Magnus let go of his hold on Alec’s hand and wrapped his arms around his neck. Alec’s arms instantly hugging around his waist, drawing Magnus in closer.
“Mhm, I did.” Magnus kissed the pink, full lips he had dreamt about ever since that first kiss.
Alec breathed him in deeply, his mouth parting for Magnus, his hands gripping tightly on Magnus’ waist.
Magnus could hear his blood pounding in his ears, Alec’s breaths deep as they kissed, the sound of their lips moving against each other.
Alec moved one hand to the back of Magnus’ neck and pulled him in more, crushing their mouths together, his nose pushing against Magnus’ cheek.
Magnus curled his fingers into the thick yarn of Alec’s sweater. He could taste the sweetness of caramel on Alec’s tongue, and smell the fresh scent of his soap on his skin. The feeling of Alec’s arms around him felt like home, Alec’s chest against him felt right, as if everything was as it should be. This unspoken thing between them was finally complete.
Magnus pulled back and brushed his lips along Alec’s jaw line. The scratchy beard was rough against his kiss swollen lips, as he found his way to Alec’s ear.
Magnus whispered into Alec’s ear, his voice raspy and shaking from exhilaration, “One day...I’m going to marry you, Alexander Lightwood.”